YES, You Can Heal Childhood PTSD Symptoms -- These Actions HELP.

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  • čas přidán 12. 02. 2023
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    ***
    You've probably sought help for the problems in your life that (whether you realize it or not) are driven by childhood trauma. You were probably told you need to TALK about it (and talk and talk and talk). As you've probably experienced, talk is not enough to produce change in your life. Once you've decided you're willing to do what it takes to heal, don't wait! These 10 tips will guide you toward actions that make a difference.
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Komentáře • 799

  • @alisoncanty1894
    @alisoncanty1894 Před 9 měsíci +223

    "Learning to make money is self-empowerment." This is absolutely true and something I'm learning right now. I love this video, Anna, because I finally feel understood by a professional for the first time in my life. Can definitely relate to the "abandonment melange" because it landed me in a hospital many years ago but also everything else. Your point about choosing friends who are working on themselves is like gold to me because I think this is a huge part of healing, too, since you can get mired down with people who are remaining in their dysfunction. I need to do The Daily Practice. Wish I would have known about all this 29 years ago because my life would have been so different but now I do! Thank you!! 💝💖

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 9 měsíci +7

      I'm so glad you're here now! -Calista@TeamFairy

    • @FlyHoneyBre
      @FlyHoneyBre Před 8 měsíci +9

      so true. I don't know how to make money and that's been really hard lately.

    • @joycejones5881
      @joycejones5881 Před 8 měsíci +4

      😊😊

    • @Zeadalamusic
      @Zeadalamusic Před 6 měsíci +1

      ​@@CrappyChildhoodFairy❤

    • @mattkinsella9856
      @mattkinsella9856 Před 5 měsíci +3

      I can absolutely relate! I spent most of my 20s and early 30s making a lot of money and it helped massively with my childhood trauma (in that it helped me get far away, create genuine healthy boundaries, so I could be myself). In recent years I felt guilty and worried I was being shallow and too money oriented but now I see for me personally it's self empowering and makes me feel safe in my independence, so I can stop feeling negative about that aspect of my drive to make money 😊

  • @psykmeistr
    @psykmeistr Před rokem +845

    1. Learn to emotionally regulate yourself.
    2. Save your social and romantic energy for people who can reciprocate. The attraction to unavailable people is very tempting but needs to stop.
    3. Get really good at ending relationships that aren't reciprocal. Be aware of abandonment malange (mashup): rage, fear, and sadness.
    4. Choose friends who are working on themselves and are doing things you admire.
    5. Find activities and hobbies that bring you growth. Take a class, learn about money, etc.
    6. Look for people who are wise and fair. Morally good people. Stop crap-fitting like you had to as a child with CPTSD.
    7. Seek to be a generous and charitable person. If you're staying in relationships with people who let you down and then you have to nag them, it turns you into someone you're not. How do I feel after I hang out with this person? Inspired and energized? Or drained and bad about yourself?
    8. When a good relationship has broken down, keep your words minimal. Learn to apologize for your part without bringing up all of their part. Check your agenda. Do your exits gently and kindly.
    9. Acknowledge the suffering you've been though, but focus more on the now; on what you can change now. How to deal with your triggers now.
    10. Seek out and practice techniques that actually help you, aka The Daily Practice 🙏🏼

  • @hv935
    @hv935 Před rokem +845

    I feel safe and seen when I listening to you.

  • @SuraDoes
    @SuraDoes Před rokem +253

    The emotional dysregulation is TOO much. It happens so quickly. You snap and then you immediately have to apologize for acting out of character. Then you feel shame or guilt. Sometimes the triggers are so tiny you can’t identify them.

    • @ittyfittykelly
      @ittyfittykelly Před rokem +11

      Exactly my issues

    • @mystic627
      @mystic627 Před rokem +32

      When I am triggered, I feel like I have been caught in a tornado that drags me emotionally through the mud. I feel totally out of control, hopeless and helpless and very scared. I really need to learn how to deal with the triggers.

    • @cathrinegray2947
      @cathrinegray2947 Před 10 měsíci +12

      Get a Therapist who deals with CPTSD- I have found one and you can get better. I just have started with this therapist- but the hope I have to get my mind better is just so exciting for me- I have only realized what the crux of my issues are and I'm over 50. It's never too late- ever. Best of good wishes for you.

    • @Rossbach2
      @Rossbach2 Před 9 měsíci +7

      @@mystic627 I think that what Anna is suggesting is that if we can name the fear (the tornado, in your case), we can manage it, which greatly reduces its power over us.

    • @estherconstantakis6304
      @estherconstantakis6304 Před 8 měsíci +10

      I have struggled with emotional dysregulation for years. I never knew what it was until I found this channel. I felt so bad, because when it was triggered, I would run from people without any explanation. I would get so frustrated, unable to speak, and I would just run away. I always hated that I did that, but could not control it or explain it to the person I did it too.

  • @karenr5870
    @karenr5870 Před 11 měsíci +153

    “Feeling your feelings is important, but feeling your
    Dysregulation is destructive!” Wow! This is so on point 😮

    • @mystic627
      @mystic627 Před 9 měsíci +1

      Well feeling your disregulation can’t be helped dealing with it is another matter.

  • @TheMidnightModder
    @TheMidnightModder Před rokem +213

    "It's okay to feel your feelings, just don't let all of them manifest into actions." Is a good way of understanding one of your points.

  • @laurier125
    @laurier125 Před 8 měsíci +53

    I wish I had heard this in my 20’s. Better late than never. I’m 62 and I’m looking forward to learning another way to live. Thanks!

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 8 měsíci +1

      Glad you're with us and open to healing!
      Nika@TeamFairy

    • @bushcraftcreationsbykristi2590
      @bushcraftcreationsbykristi2590 Před 4 měsíci +2

      I’m sending the list of ten to my 20 yr old b/g twins. I’ve just now started to heal and I see soooo much of this in ALL of us. I’m an alcoholic and just realized I’m a hoarder, so they need this just as much, if not more than me. I sure wish I’d seen this decades ago!

    • @ginaleith1510
      @ginaleith1510 Před 4 měsíci +2

      I completely understand and empathise! I'm still going to try too - it's not too late. Don't give up! ❤

    • @bihippychic
      @bihippychic Před 2 měsíci +2

      thank you soooo much for commenting that you are brave enough to start this journey. i am brave too

    • @lisaibrindle2230
      @lisaibrindle2230 Před 26 dny +1

      Me too❤

  • @MjF809
    @MjF809 Před rokem +46

    I saw a phd that is a trauma expert.
    He said a study was done about support groups and medical research proved that re hashing or listening to other peoples traumas makes the trauma more severe.
    We absorb positivity and negativity from others.

    • @codacreator6162
      @codacreator6162 Před 2 měsíci +3

      Can. I think the consensus is that rehashing your trauma can retraumatize you. But I think it’s important to do at least once, to get it all compartmented. Then, you can go about dealing with it. I think it’s equally damaging not to address trauma at all. How do you know you’re dealing with it all?

  • @hasnachandika
    @hasnachandika Před rokem +85

    Just wanted to share that I had a realisation of what CPTSD is.. I have a rabbit - he is cute but he very often bites to get attention so I have to be very aware of where he is when he is outside of the cage. So not long ago there was a cat in my flat for a week. Cat is a similar size to the rabbit, moves quietly, but does not bite. When I was doing my things and noticed the cat moving towards me, I immediately started to pull away or defend myself from reflex. Although there was no reason to defend from a cat, I very often still had the reflex. So bringing it to adulthood - i see now that I have a reflex of defending and hiding myself from people. Even from people who would never bite.

  • @mygdaliafierro0731
    @mygdaliafierro0731 Před 4 měsíci +14

    I can be a horrible person to others who don’t deserve my anger….then my guilt for being so angry. Your videos are a blessing!!! Being sexually abused, beaten, verbally called a “whore” by my mother at 4yrs old….I can go on and on with the pain. I do want to stop the damage! I want to show love and kindness.

    • @danabennett4098
      @danabennett4098 Před 2 měsíci +1

      You WILL get there - stopping the damage. I had a narcissist mother who sexualized the entire family. And she got other family members to do her dirty work. All I can say is - HANG in there, and follow the good advice, as much as possible. Take in the unconditional love when it comes along - "love without strings attached". You WILL know it when it shows up - but honestly, not right away. Just let the "right and good" people stay long enough to show that.
      This video and the Good Practice is the BEST thing to come along for me in a Very Long Time. But others preceded it. Even at 76 years old, I'm a Work In Progress!! You have LOTS of company

    • @monikagin
      @monikagin Před 14 dny

      Hey, I am in the same boat as you..
      We are all trying to be better 1 step at a time.

  • @charlottetaylor4471
    @charlottetaylor4471 Před rokem +32

    I am so ANGRY. How dare parents do this to us. I can't get past the anger.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +16

      When it is stuck like that, we call it resentment. That's what The Daily Practice I teach is for. I hope you'll give a try.

    • @1234lowkey
      @1234lowkey Před rokem +7

      For me, I found it useful to have a lens of compassion towards them. Instead of having an expectation of how parents should behave towards their children, accept that they are flawed humans. Most of these parents have their children walk away from them because their own insecurities prevent them from having actual relationships with their children. That’s a sad and pathetic way to go through life. You can learn from that and choose a different path which is a blessing.

    • @piscesempress1978
      @piscesempress1978 Před rokem +5

      @@1234lowkey I will never give any compassion to my father.. He does not deserve it.

    • @DJWakening
      @DJWakening Před rokem +5

      Hmm, I think having a lens of compassion is different from giving the abusers actual compassion, but I can understand both sides of the above statements. I agree, observing the past with a lens of compassion helps. understanding that whilst they are accountable for their deeds, they were/are also broken people. Most broken people don't fully understand they're not as they should be because they are consumed by their disordered way of being. Give thanks that we're not condemned to be like them, as they grew even more bitter over time, and karma is not kind.

    • @mellifergold
      @mellifergold Před 10 měsíci +3

      ​@@piscesempress1978
      But YOU deserve being free of anger/ resentment
      - it is YOUR burden...

  • @GTaichou
    @GTaichou Před rokem +52

    Honestly, "charm school for feral women" would have sold me 100%. I've always embraced the idea of a "wild woman" as a woman with dreams and opinions. It feels strong as heck to me. :)

    • @ShintogaDeathAngel
      @ShintogaDeathAngel Před 5 měsíci

      Me too, shouldn’t be that way (we should already feel like our opinions and dreams matter as much as anyone else’s, no matter our sex/gender) but yeah!

  • @lifescalling8080
    @lifescalling8080 Před rokem +94

    I love the way you can explain such heavy things while still keeping a lighthearted tone. It makes it so much easier to absorb and accept the information that is needed for personal healing and growth. I really appreciate what you are doing! ❤

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +4

      Thank you for your kind words :) -Calista@TeamFairy

    • @jaytoussaint9598
      @jaytoussaint9598 Před 10 měsíci +2

      It’s a gift that not very many people have and should be cherished. I’m glad she uses it.

    • @tomkore7865
      @tomkore7865 Před 9 měsíci +1

      It's very difficult for me to heal myself I'm 75 too late. I've been neglected by parents molested by my brother, molested by my neighbor, all this before I was 9 yes old. I try to forget but it comes back to make me feel sorry for myself. But I like listening to you, and I thank you.

    • @MaleneMaare
      @MaleneMaare Před 7 měsíci

      ⁠@@tomkore7865Dear you, I'm 61 and I have the same feeling sometimes, that it's too late. Your comment made me think about that we have to look at how to make our today a little bit better than yesterday - not that grand 'feeling absolutely happy' that we think we can see in others and envy them for - and loose all energy because there are too many steps on that ladder. You are beginning your healing by being here, listening to Anna and reading comments. That is actually a big step considering how new the CPTSD diagnosis is. (I'm not sure it's even recognized yet in my country Denmark). It IS very unfair that we will maybe never get that complete feeling of happiness and being at ease with ourselves and the world, but we can do alot to get a little better if we break it down into more manageable pieces. We have the right to feel sorry for ourselves because much bad happened to us, but it can also become a shield that prevents us from a lot of small good things that could make us feel better. Try to look at everytime you have a choice, to say yes or no, to go right or left - hesitate a bit and think about what would actually, truly make you feel a little bit better in this situation. Play with the thought that you are a 'neutral' person, not a traumatized one - what would you do if so? Is there a part in you that protects you in a healthy way, and is there a part in you that protects your identity as a traumatized person? You are your own healer - and that is damned because it is so hard and lonely and blessed too, because you have yourself with yourself all the time and can become your own best friend and advisor.
      I wish you all the best, I'm writing this just as much for myself to live by. Love Malene

    • @sathya999
      @sathya999 Před 6 měsíci +1

      @@tomkore7865 It is never too late. I am 80 and loving the information and practice. "It's too late" is nothing more than a negative thought...

  • @justinesimone5343
    @justinesimone5343 Před 7 měsíci +16

    I don't feel dysregulation coming on. I am almost totally solo. I have one friend who accepts me how I am, but she has a loving family who contact her and show love and respect daily. She doesn't get it when I try to explain why I must back off from my daughter, who gives me breadcrumbs and disrespect. It's just pain!
    You're right about finding joy somewhere! I just took an art course which I didn't need to learn from- just to make me get back into my creativity!
    All began when I was a baby. My Mom used to ignore me. She'd leave me in the carriage in the yard even after my nap was over and I was screaming, or in my crib way too long. She didn't want me. Then at 9 years old I became Cinderella, responsible for cleaning our apt. Grocery shopping and cooking. My brother and sister had no responsibilities. If I was out playing and didn't clean the house, my (4 years older) brother would pull me up the stairs by my hair to do "my job." We were all sexually abused by my Mothers Father. We all had a lot of anger or rage. My brother took it out on me. He beat me and stomped on me.
    It went on to me attaching to the wrong men. (Abusive, alcoholic, cheaters, disrespectful). I'm now 78 years old, I'm done with crap fitting. Solo is better.
    Years ago I went to a PTSD women's group. 12 of them gave a synopsis of their trauma. Each one turned to drugs, alcohol, sex, etc. I realized how strong I am because I became a good citizen. Had responsible jobs until I could buy my own home, had my own business, put my daughter through UPENN etc. Ironically I lost my home (on the water)and all belongings to mold and a greedy attorney. Now living in a low income housing apt.
    Thank you for your teaching, it gives me understanding about wrong decisions I've made. Many Blessings. ❣️

    • @CS-fz2iw
      @CS-fz2iw Před 3 měsíci +1

      Thank you for your sharing. It shed a light on some similarities.
      May your space and home be(come) a safe heaven, container of nurturing and joy and lots of laughter.

  • @frappalina
    @frappalina Před rokem +65

    This is so helpful for me. When someone gets angry at me and calls me out for behaviour that I don't feel should have offended them I often explode in anger (I was punished and beaten for small things so it triggers me immensely) or, at best, I shut down and start to resent them so hard that I end up cutting them out of my life... and it it so hard to apologize. whenever I do that, it feels like abusing myself. But I understand that it is just projection of my childhood trauma on other people.

    • @greyladydamiana
      @greyladydamiana Před 9 měsíci +4

      That’s absolutely what it sounds like - - you’re treating them like you want to treat your parents. As much as you want to rage at your parents and cut them out, you wind up repeating that pattern on somebody else.

    • @annagro2225
      @annagro2225 Před 3 měsíci +3

      OMG you are explaining my life

  • @Phoenix487559
    @Phoenix487559 Před 11 měsíci +31

    I really love Dr Maté, but man girl you hit the nail right on the head. I’ve been teaching, counseling, and HAD read so many books and have gone to therapy for years and why doesn’t anyone know about this? I was a Chaplain Assistant in the Army and man, we could have really used your advice when dealing with Soldiers and their families too. Because as a lower enlisted person in the military you joined bc you had no other options. Your whole life was trauma and then you live and work around a bunch of other people who are traumatized so we all just fuel each other. And this leads to being very self destructive as a young person in the military. We need this message more than ever right now!

  • @allgoodanimals6769
    @allgoodanimals6769 Před rokem +50

    My mother is 81 and whenever I go visit my parents or talk to her on the phone, I get so triggered, irritable, and depressed. It takes me two weeks to detox after visiting her. But I go to see my dad. I feel so guilty saying that I can’t stand being around her. She treated my older sister much differently than she treated me. I’ve had low level depression since I was a kid.

    • @paulaw9764
      @paulaw9764 Před rokem +5

      I resonate with you, I felt the same. It does make you feel guilty, but the truth is the truth and parents who fail miserably with their Children, they get their karma one way or another. Often by being discussed and their faults pointed out to other people, that's their karma for their failings, why should we feel guilty.

    • @TheblondJane25
      @TheblondJane25 Před rokem +1

      Same here!

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Před 10 měsíci +4

      My mother was deceptive in her behavior & words she used with me. She was a great cook/baker & we had people over all the time. And of course, my mother loved the attention. She made the food for my wedding reception, which was very nice of her, right down to the cake. The reception was at the house and about 31 people, small. It turned into a show for her. How good the food was, how great the cake etc. Which compliments were fine but it was no longer about me & my groom. It was another chance for her to gain the admiration of people, some of whom she did not know. I did feel slighted but what am I a monster to not be thankful but in reality -- It was MY wedding & MY reception with my new husband.
      She even sewed my wedding dress - so that got her even more compliments. It was nice of her to do all of this for me but where was the razzle dazzle for us?

    • @allgoodanimals6769
      @allgoodanimals6769 Před 10 měsíci +3

      @g: wow that is awful. I’m sorry to hear your big day became about her! So selfish. I can totally relate to this. Doing “nice” things gives them fuel through accolades. They thrive off of the attention. If they are denied the attention or accolades they get angry or pout. I could share so many stories of my own…

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Před 9 měsíci +1

      @@allgoodanimals6769 I do appreciate her making food for the small reception. But for once could I & my groom have been the center of attention? I was never the center. She adored her son. She ruined one daughter & I was the quiet good girl. Don't ever be the "good girl". The good girl has no power & when you try to make your own decisions, rather than support you get a response of: is that a good idea or you can't do that. The next day I went to the house to retrieve gloves for the honeymoon & my Dad saw me walking up the driveway & said - "what are YOU doing here?" Was he afraid I was running back home?

  • @charlottetaylor4471
    @charlottetaylor4471 Před rokem +16

    I have no purpose, no motivation, I'm utterly stuck with zero idea what to do. I can't try to heal and do normal things like start a career etc.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +6

      I'm so sorry that's how you're feeling. If you're interested, I really suggest you check out Anna's free course 'The Daily Practice', it's a great place to start the process of healing. Here is the link: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice -Calista@TeamFairy

    • @BMfixit
      @BMfixit Před měsícem

      I'm getting better. Grief Share is a group setting that people gather in a group. It's sad to hear all the stories but it helps me feel I'm not alone. Taking about your trauma is hard to near impossible at first. Once your able to speak on your story without breaking down, your on the road to recovery. Forgiving the ones that's harmed us is the final key. Forgive the living or the deceased isn't for them, it's for us to deal with the hurt. Focusing on the good things alone isn't enough without talking about it

  • @simonehejazi2304
    @simonehejazi2304 Před rokem +23

    I totally understand why you discourage talking about trauma. We create new neurological channels when we do something in a different way, but the brain keeps the old ones and prefer them due to familiarity. example if we were conditions by trauma to react with anger and we choose to change our ways we need to be very careful not to slip back to the old path because it’s the automatic option. And makes us feel hopeless

  • @kimberlyeisenmann8036
    @kimberlyeisenmann8036 Před rokem +14

    Whenever I talk about my childhood, it feels like speaking about someone else's childhood. I'm completely disconnected from it

  • @Stillness1
    @Stillness1 Před 11 měsíci +48

    This message of “You CAN heal” resonated so deeply in me today that I cried, because it’s been such a long and difficult journey, and I’ve come so far but still feel held back by my traumas. Thank you for saying what I needed to hear!

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 11 měsíci +1

      Absolutely! You got this :) -Calista@TeamFairy

    • @mystic627
      @mystic627 Před 9 měsíci +4

      Yes but we don’t heal ourselves we allow the healing to happen.

    • @Stillness1
      @Stillness1 Před 9 měsíci

      @@mystic627 we do heal ourselves.

    • @monachauncey7772
      @monachauncey7772 Před 9 měsíci

    • @Evilmindy12
      @Evilmindy12 Před 9 měsíci

      Felt, for me it’s locating all the wounds. I find sometimes that I didn’t know it triggers me till I come across it, but I immediately hop on the “ time to do some shadow work” train.

  • @luise_sams
    @luise_sams Před rokem +41

    12:10 growth can also be physical! It helped me a lot to start training and regain some muscels. Working on outer strength helps the inner strength.

    • @Cravenn5
      @Cravenn5 Před 10 měsíci +4

      ❤ indeed my growth journey❣️

    • @StudiosDelirium
      @StudiosDelirium Před 6 měsíci +4

      Discipline and keeping our promises to oneself is indeed growth.😊 Self love.

  • @1963christmas
    @1963christmas Před rokem +49

    How amazing are you Anna?! It takes a very special and wise person to dedicate their life to first learn, then use that knowledge to aid others in their recovery of CPTSD. Thank you so very much. Xx

  • @vivistar2232
    @vivistar2232 Před 8 měsíci +20

    It's easy for her to say that we should find healthy wise people that surround ourselves with. The problem is, the pool of healthy, wise people is extremely limited. Most people are manipulative codependants speckled with narcissists. Like Anna says, "Become a ninja at being alone."
    It is truly better to be alone than to be caught up with those who are perishing.

    • @junemyres1435
      @junemyres1435 Před 8 měsíci +4

      Better to be alone then be with unhealthy people 😂

    • @kursengamer4699
      @kursengamer4699 Před 4 měsíci +2

      I wish my ex would go through this help as well then we could at least have it in common

  • @miavos3610
    @miavos3610 Před rokem +4

    People who mock you for abstaining are the ones who can't help themselves.

  • @motsnrub
    @motsnrub Před rokem +54

    Today marks one month that I've been doing the free, 'Daily Practice', two times a day, as shown in the link below the video. The other videos are great at marking the course of our healing, but it's actually doing The Daily Practice that seems to really catalyze the healing process. Get on it, folks! Thanks 🧚‍♂🧚‍♀🧚

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +13

      yes! Thanks for saying it. I'm a broken record on this one.

    • @charlotte5671
      @charlotte5671 Před rokem +13

      I was just thinking- ok maybe I need to start that. I'm seeing that I need to heal my relationship & communication skills. I feel like I don't know how to express my feelings, I don't say something when I am upset. I want to have solid friendships & meet a partner who wants to enjoy life together ❤️ I'm ready to make new decisions that make my life more full. Happy Healing all 💙

    • @Ozzychk
      @Ozzychk Před rokem +7

      I’ve been listening to this page for at least a year, but just this week started writing down my fears and resentments. Today will be day 3 ❤😂

    • @lpetitoiseau9146
      @lpetitoiseau9146 Před rokem +5

      Okay! I’m going to give “the daily practice “ both time & effort. Gently & consistently practice it.

  • @nwabisaphikwa9790
    @nwabisaphikwa9790 Před 11 měsíci +34

    I am on a self discovery, healing & self improvement journey and so i recently discovered this channel and after listening in on this video and taking down notes I was convinced to subscribe to this channel. I believe discovering this channel might be the best thing to have happened to me currently in my life. Thank you so much for every word you have shared on this video. It has been eye opening and so so helpful for me personally! And I can’t wait to share with others

  • @SS-in1ts
    @SS-in1ts Před rokem +14

    Very true, when counselors have told me to feel my feelings, I had to explain that I can only acknowledge and then move on and distract myself because I’ve almost gone into a mental breakdown from feeling my feelings, it is too much and it’s not safe to do for me. I could’ve ended up in a hospital. Sometimes denial or distraction is useful until more time passes.

  • @andersenaquatics4236
    @andersenaquatics4236 Před rokem +19

    This video just changed my life, you have said everything I’ve ever felt in the past 26 years of my life. I’ve had the worst childhood. And it bugs me to no end that I try to figure out what’s wrong with me, and doctors immediately try to shove medications down my throat for the way I feel. I realized today that I have childhood PTSD. And today I vow to try my absolute best to fix the behaviors and actions that come with constantly being emotionally disregulated. I would really love to speak to you in person if this is possible. All I ever wanted was to speak to someone that can understand me. And I feel that you can understand where I come from.

  • @KM-dx5wn
    @KM-dx5wn Před 2 měsíci +1

    Your work is a godsend to me. I'm in my 60's and I have suffered my entire life, never being able to figure out why nothing seemed to work for me, no matter how hard I tried, or why I couldn't attract "sane, normal" people in romance, or jobs that treated me with fairness, or why I could never seem to connect the dots. I would stare at "normal" lives and think, "why can't I have that ... why can't I get there?" It was alwauys out of reach. It's been isolating and filled with adversity. I've self-medicated to stop the triggers.
    Now I undersand the trauma and abuse I suffered as a child propelled s life I never wanted to lead, a life filled with sadness and frustration. I've underearned and undervalued myself at every turn. I've accepted crumbs and "crap-fitted." My housing situation was never secure. It's finally taken a life-threatening illness to wake me up and seek true, deep level healing. I stumbled across this channel by Divine Intervention. I feel as though my head has been opened wide, and enormous light let in.

  • @miriamhamsa
    @miriamhamsa Před 9 měsíci +12

    I've described myself as having a feral childhood too. Not that I was actively abused or abandoned, but my family wasn't loving, nor did they teach me anything about the world, relationships, anything. No conversations. I was told a few months ago I needed better quality people in my life, and I have been working on it. This is so deflating at age 76.

    • @user-ff8vo1se8v
      @user-ff8vo1se8v Před 7 měsíci

      my story, same age.

    • @user-ff8vo1se8v
      @user-ff8vo1se8v Před 7 měsíci

      Never heard , I love you, from parents.😢

    • @vanessapetrea2490
      @vanessapetrea2490 Před 7 měsíci

      There’s an empowerment knowing this now. You’ve a clean slate to feel how you can now feel and love and parent yourself with this new knowledge. I know you can do it!!! I have faith!!🙏🏽💗🙏🏽

    • @danabennett4098
      @danabennett4098 Před 2 měsíci

      I'm 76 years old, too. And have been around the ringer so many times. Ultimately, I did find some VERY RIGHT people. I HAD to move from the physical environment of the STATE OF FLORIDA - to finally do it! I moved to Colorado nearly 40 years ago - and FINALLY, slowly but surely, the right people and right healers, making great friends SHOWED UP. Darlin', It's NEVER TOO late! Day by day, start doing things for yourself. I recommend a book on creativity - that helped me AND A LOT OF OTHER PEOPLE TOO! And you'll start by thinking - I'm not an artist! BUT we all are, us humans. "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron. Daily lessons to read and DO!!! It works - easily.
      I DO HEAR YOU, @miriamhamsa !!!

  • @RT-fo4up
    @RT-fo4up Před rokem +10

    Charm school for feral girls😂😂😂 Gosh I really need that!

  • @cindyrobinson3882
    @cindyrobinson3882 Před 7 měsíci +15

    This was soooo awesome!! After 30 yrs of therapy, I learned more from this short video than in 30 yrs of therapy. At 61 yrs old, its time for me to "live".😊 ❤ 🙌 🙏 I remind myself, I didn't get this way overnight, but I see the "light" now. When I went thru chemo alone, I had 21 surgeries & hospitalized multiple times.....I wld remind myself, these are "speedbumps" in my journey. They may slow me down, but they are not going to stop me. 😊

  • @Courtney-pn5lr
    @Courtney-pn5lr Před rokem +31

    Emotion dysregulation is the biggest hurdle. Rejection and deception are huge triggers for me. Practicing DBT so I'm learning the tools, but it's hard to implement them in the moment.

  • @lilyruby3733
    @lilyruby3733 Před rokem +8

    Kind fair wise people: =the pursuit of happiness 😊

  • @iheartbellatutu6915
    @iheartbellatutu6915 Před 7 měsíci +2

    Coming here to have my safe space. I wish she’s my Mom.
    I’m just imagining she’s my
    Mom. I just love the way she talks. She speaks to me lol.

  • @Rayasratchetplants
    @Rayasratchetplants Před 11 měsíci +5

    Im 48 years old...And I swear I could totally sign up for Charm School for Feral girls..even today! Gen X raising with additional childhood Trauma did us dirty😅

  • @joymoody2372
    @joymoody2372 Před rokem +15

    Mom was diagnosed with advanced cancer when I was 15. The fear & 11 years of anticipatory grief were never discussed inside or outside of the family.

  • @riadrossos-usa4415
    @riadrossos-usa4415 Před 11 měsíci +13

    ❤❤❤ You translated my life in real words. Thank you for existing in our world. Thanks for being real to yourself and us.

  • @mendingmandy869
    @mendingmandy869 Před rokem +29

    I get really confused about the friendship arena. I have friends who aren't bad but things seem to become one sided. I become a counselor to all of my friends which is ironic because I'm the most traumatized. Can you do a video on how to know which friends aren't great? I know toxic signs but not friends who are just okay. Do you cut just ok friends out?

    • @kadraabdoulkader8033
      @kadraabdoulkader8033 Před rokem +5

      im in the same positions as you

    • @Kate98755
      @Kate98755 Před rokem +4

      If the friend isn’t caring for your soul, being kind, looking out for you, they aren’t real friends. Friends don’t tear another friend down, like sarcasm, that is verbally attacking someone, it’s a weapon because some part of it is true…and long after the comment you’ll still be thinking about it. That’s not good for you.

    • @valeriezaitzieff1462
      @valeriezaitzieff1462 Před rokem +9

      Maybe instead of trying to fix your friends' problems, focus on fixing your own, then share your progress with them. Conserve your energy and let them take responsibilty for their own lives.

    • @mendingmandy869
      @mendingmandy869 Před rokem +4

      @VALERIE Zaitzieff definitely good advice :) I've been doing that more in the past few months and putting up boundaries. It's going a lot better

    • @ShintogaDeathAngel
      @ShintogaDeathAngel Před 5 měsíci +1

      I don’t think you have to cut “just ok” friends out - ask yourself how you feel in general after hanging out with them etc. But I agree you need to stop the counselling. Signposting resources here and there can be ok but step back a bit and spend that energy on yourself from now on.

  • @donaldwilliamson1200
    @donaldwilliamson1200 Před 3 měsíci +1

    I wanted to thank you for your content. Thank you lol. I was diagnosed with ADHD, autism, and cptsd. I never realized how much problems came from cptsd. I always thought it was the ADHD, autism, and OCD. I found your content and quickly realized it's the trauma that I was looking past that's controlling my life. I'm 40 years old and I couldn't figure out why I could only heal so much before I got bad again. I now know why and am getting so much better in such a short time than ever before. I was abused Sexually, emotionally, physically and was taken from my family as a child. Being abused and then taken away was so painful and confusing. I thought it was all my fault I mean how couldn't it be it's all happening to me and now I'm being taken away. Anyways now I'm oversharing. I found the adhd and autism is easier to manage as I take care of the ptsd. You are amazing thank you so much for being you.

  • @glachloser
    @glachloser Před rokem +16

    Abandonment melange and dysregulation are synonymous for me and I don't have to be abandoned to have it triggered. Anything like even thinking about a woman will trigger it but not necessarily hijack me if I'm regulates but it just builds. Thoughts as triggers as Pete walker says

  • @nallelygarcia2232
    @nallelygarcia2232 Před 11 měsíci +7

    I spent the whole last 48 hours binge watching your videos and Omg 🖤😭 where have you been my whole life. These videos have been more helpful
    Then any therapist I've been too

  • @remissao13
    @remissao13 Před rokem +29

    Whenever I need some energy to deal with the challenges brought about by CPTSD I come here and listen to Anna some. It's amazing you survived, it's amazing we survived.

  • @FinalfantasyFRANtic
    @FinalfantasyFRANtic Před 9 měsíci +4

    What really helps me with 'abandonment melange' (currently alone in a shared flat since I wanted to avoid a vacation with an abusive roommate but that also cuts me off from the group) is going out into and connecting with nature: barefoot on the grass, naked (ok, I kept my swimsuit on) in the water, BREATHING, FEELING morning dew, raindrops, chilly grass, and the water resisting my strokes as I make my way across the lake

  • @BlankName88
    @BlankName88 Před rokem +6

    I've been told I need therapy I don't know how many times, but I think I'm doing a great job healing without it. I beat alcoholism 4 years ago and only smoke weed, and I'm able to control my anger. In fact, I think weed helped me more than any therapist could. It's helped me work through a lot of emotional block ups.

  • @stephaniez2349
    @stephaniez2349 Před rokem +30

    Your videos have been so helpful to me. I always knew something was wrong but I didn't know what or how to control myself. Once I heard you explain emotional dysregulation I knew exactly what you were talking about. Once I knew what the problem was I could stop myself and respond instead of react. Thank you!

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +1

      Wow, I'm so happy to hear that! Thank you for taking the time to comment, I'm sure Anna will want to read this. -Calista@TeamFairy

    • @Borsfrancis
      @Borsfrancis Před rokem +6

      Naming this thing that's been there for 40 years often negatively affecting my life is a revelation and a grieving. I feel a completely different person aged 52!

  • @AnEsotericMind
    @AnEsotericMind Před rokem +10

    naming things is so powerful. I am getting soooo much better at moving away from people and situations that do not serve me, because I can name the reasons why.

  • @toe2toelikeimali
    @toe2toelikeimali Před rokem +32

    thank you for everything. i’m struggling trying to heal but we all probably are lol but these videos and your intellect and such informativeness has pushed me ahead tremendously.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +4

      It is a struggle to heal. But It's great to hear that you are trying. Sending you encouragement. Jack@TeamFairy

  • @katiesmith6659
    @katiesmith6659 Před rokem +22

    I done your daily practice for the first time yesterday and during the meditation I felt like I released so much, like it was yawns but not from tiredness or boredom but to release staleness from inside I don't know how to explain it, but it was amazing and made me have relief for like 3 hours which was nice

    • @normabarker8958
      @normabarker8958 Před 10 měsíci +2

      Yawns are toxicity leaving your body. Always happens to me when I start working out again after taking time away from being physically active

  • @nataliemarkham6182
    @nataliemarkham6182 Před 6 dny

    I’ve never felt so seen in my entire life - I feel the kind of amazement when a magic trick just blew your mind. It’s a little uncomfortable but also full of hope.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 5 dny

      Thank you for watching and taking the time to comment! Hope you will find help here!
      Nika@TeamFairy

  • @suzihazlove4979
    @suzihazlove4979 Před rokem +5

    You KNOW SO WELL. I see so much of my wasted energy trying to make a relationship work that doesnt. Made me toxic. And i didnt like myself. He needs to fix himself and i need to do me. He doesnt want my help. And i had to accept that.
    Now im gonna be me with the right people.

  • @linettaalexanderislam2751
    @linettaalexanderislam2751 Před 10 měsíci +4

    Whew! Number 6 punched me in the gut…so stalling the divorce process and having daily phone calls with my husband when I know we’ve exhausted our relationship and there is no way we can be happy and healthy together is not only crap-fitting 😢 but also I’m retraumatizing myself…and probably him as well?!?!?!!!! 🤯

  • @miavos3610
    @miavos3610 Před rokem +4

    I've been talking about my Crappy Childhood for FAR TOO LONG. Thank heavens God is guiding me to a better life. Year after year. Decade after decade. Things happened to fast forward my healing.

  • @anon6056
    @anon6056 Před 9 měsíci +2

    1. learn how to emotionally regulate
    2. Save your social and romantic energy for people who can reciprocate it
    3. Get really good at ending relationships with people who are bad for you
    4. Choose friends who are working on themselves and do things with their life that you admire (be with people you respect, not just wherever you end up around and relates to you)
    5. Find activities hobbies things to do in your spare time that bring you growth (especially hobbies that help you learn how to make a living)(and reading books)
    6. When you're looking for people to have in your life look for people who are wise and fair (charm school)(seek people you can learn from)(people with integrity better than what you learned at home)(you will be so affected by the people you are around so choose them well)
    7. seek to be a kina and generous and charitable person (of spirit)
    8. How do you feel after you hang out with them? This is how you tell who's good for you. It's a sign (but keeo in mind negative feelings can be emotional flashbacks so it may be confusing)
    8. When a good relationship has broken down even when its plain to you how the other person contributed to the problem, dont tear them a new one. Learn how to walk away from a broken relationship without a big fight. Keep the explanation minimal and simply set your boundary and leave. Don't be venting at them for no good reason. Live in a world where no one is destroyed by you and you maintain your own power over who gets to be in your life. A lot of things you want to say when you're dysregulated are a bad idea so run it by a mentor first
    9. Acknowledge your suffering in the past but focus on what you can do to heal now. Now you want money and healthy relationships, your whole life is ahead of you, you can't see it in your imagination. Start anywhere
    10. Seek out practices that help you bring down your cptsd responses. She teaches the daily practice

  • @jacquietarr7280
    @jacquietarr7280 Před rokem +7

    I’m 65. Just wish I had found you earlier. Thank you so much for your knowledge, compassion and generosity ❤

  • @arlettasloan6453
    @arlettasloan6453 Před rokem +8

    I would totally go to Charm School for Feral Girls. I feel like a school with that name would have the understanding needed for the situatios that will develop. Even though, like the some of the kitties on my porch, I am fairly benign for being feral so long.

  • @dreamylove4196
    @dreamylove4196 Před rokem +10

    Does anyone have advice for how to feel allowed to feel happy? How do we feel worthy of happiness?? How do we feel good enough to be happy and have good things?

    • @beverleymacca4737
      @beverleymacca4737 Před rokem +11

      What I found helps is to parent myself. I treat myself the way I would treat a child I care about. So, I encourage myself to have fun, I praise myself when I do good things, I don't belittle, berate or criticise myself. I encourage myself to do the 'right' things in a gentle way. I celebrate achievements. I break things down that I find hard, etc. I check in with what I really feel and what I really need and I give myself what I need. Those continuous actions to care for myself add up over time to feeling loved and cared for. It helps to build my self esteem and see myself as someone worthy of happiness 🙏

    • @rixatrix
      @rixatrix Před rokem +8

      This might feel weird, but I try to think of myself as an animal. We’re all mammals, like dogs or cats. And everyone loves dogs and cats just how they are-big ones, little ones, sweet ones, standoffish ones, cute ones, ugly ones. We don’t judge them as worthy or not worthy of love-we just love them, all of them, because they’re delightful.
      So picture yourself and your fellow humans like that. There’s nothing you need to do to earn love. You’re worthy just because you exist. Take a nap in the sun. Run because it feels good. Play with your favorite things and eat your favorite treats. If your self critic starts speaking up, remind it that you’re just an animal doing what animals do and that’s enough.

  • @jaylaw.7660
    @jaylaw.7660 Před rokem +19

    Thank you Anna, I think you’re so beautiful! 😘❤️ your courage, wisdom, and support speaks volumes!!

  • @totalwomanja9105
    @totalwomanja9105 Před 3 měsíci +2

    Anna, you are like a mother to me. You are so helpful and kind. I listen to you on my way to work and my days are so much better when I do. Your videos are a wealth of knowledge and you have helped me so much. Thank you.

  • @IzabelaKuchta-zk8rj
    @IzabelaKuchta-zk8rj Před rokem +9

    Hi, I found your videos accidentally. I used to be very considered about all my surrounding until I was diagnosed with lots of autoimmunities diseases which by the way are linked to my childhood trauma (Gabour Mate). I am in the process to learning to love myself and putting myself first.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +3

      That's great, we're all rooting for you :) -Calista@TeamFairy

    • @RomyRudolph
      @RomyRudolph Před 9 měsíci

      Maybe findng these videos wasnt accidental at all....:)

  • @hansisgarten
    @hansisgarten Před 6 měsíci +2

    “You get to catch up now”. This is the exact feeling I have about my life rn. I feel like I’m catching up on things I was never able to live through. Healing is learning, lesrning is healing. Thank you for your videos

  • @itsbeebaby
    @itsbeebaby Před 4 měsíci +2

    Had to take a break to let myself cry. I just stumbled across your channel and it’s like you’ve listed everything I’ve gone through. Still processing my childhood and my feelings towards my parents but OMG

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 4 měsíci

      You are in the right place. A great way to get clarity about difficult relationships is through Daily Practice. Check out the free course here: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
      Nika@TeamFairy

  • @Leslie-ye2is
    @Leslie-ye2is Před 21 dnem

    Lived a life with ptsd, addiction, prison, life crisis over and over, anxiety and panic disorder, Reocd, social and relationship avoidance, that's the story of ptsd and not truly attempting to seek out the help that is out there.

  • @grietlaenen8169
    @grietlaenen8169 Před 10 měsíci +4

    Wo, i have cptsd. Why has no therapist ever been this clear to me? I just kept talking and indeed, seeking recognition for my troubles while wanting to grow. Thank you so much!

  • @jadegreen1554
    @jadegreen1554 Před rokem +2

    “Your problem is that you don’t care enough (about yourself) to leave”.
    Seek out people who are generous and considerate and try to figure out how to leave the people without integrity behind.

  • @user-bs4nr8jk9n
    @user-bs4nr8jk9n Před 5 měsíci +1

    I remember when I was a young teenager and was having extreme anxiety about school - life and my abusive parents. My father was in a car pool with three other men. Once, I was late for school so I got in the car to be dropped off. While in the car and before my father got in - the three men started telling me what a total jerk I had for a father. They said they all hated him - and didn't want to be around him. I was devastated - but it confirmed what I had knew to be true. I think I'm starting to open up a little. I never shared these things - I always blamed myself. I cry a lot and it helps. After that - I learned my sister was sexually abused by a Catholic priest. My parents were staunch and strict Catholics - and she knew that if she said anything at all- They would blame her and never stop. My father would force us every Saturday to go to "confess our sins" to the very priest that abused her. I guess I have PTSD from all of these things. I could go on and on about the abuse. I wonder why I'm still here lots of times.

  • @cannedspecters
    @cannedspecters Před rokem +14

    You are a Godsent Anna! I have never ever had anyone explain it the way you have and I feel someone finally understands how I have always felt... Thank you so so much for what you do to help! 😊🤗

  • @jennifermarie1230
    @jennifermarie1230 Před rokem +4

    My childhood was a mess. Addictive parents. And at age 46 i just got out of a 27 year relationship with my husband, my kids dad. An. Alcoholic and narcissist. Im a mess!!

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před rokem +1

      I'm glad you are here for some support!
      -Cara@TeamFairy

    • @normabarker8958
      @normabarker8958 Před 10 měsíci +1

      I’m 43. I’m out of a 8 year marriage with an alcoholic and a narcissist. Since the divorce he’s gotten sober and seems like a decent human. Now. I Don’t know why i stated so long. And having a hard time figuring out how to move forward

    • @debbiemckenna5
      @debbiemckenna5 Před 7 měsíci

      I can totally relate to you. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and a Narc father. I was an only child. I am 53 and I married and divorced a Narc. The trauma continues to cause me problems in all areas of my life. It is debilitating. I have 3 children and they are the Only thing that keeps me going.

  • @marylind6626
    @marylind6626 Před 2 měsíci

    I am so grateful to God for finding you on CZcams.

  • @MsCarolynseah
    @MsCarolynseah Před 4 měsíci +2

    I’m stunned that after all these years. I find you. I finally feel forgiveness and compassion for my mistakes and failures caused by the condition.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 4 měsíci

      Wow, that's amazing. I'm so glad you found the channel :) -Calista@TeamFairy

  • @gretchenthreet6750
    @gretchenthreet6750 Před měsícem

    I can really relate to being raised feral and the need for charm school (17:20). I grew up in an upper middle class family and was sent to private schools starting at age nine, yet was never taught any social skills beyond the most basic table manners. However, when I inevitably made social faux pas and embarrassed my mother in front of others, she would fly into a towering rage. It wasn't until I was grown that I realized that it wasn't my fault for not having finishing school manners. It had been HER responsibility to TEACH me how to behave the way she wanted, not to expect me to just "know" everything. Back then, we didn't have options like search engines the way we do nowadays.

  • @janesturgeon4404
    @janesturgeon4404 Před 5 měsíci +1

    Anna, thank you. 💗 When the student is ready the teacher appears. 😘 Xx

  • @Mushibaby
    @Mushibaby Před měsícem

    1. Emotionally regulate- stop the damage to calm emotional regulation, tune in, airplane taking off about things
    -feeling your dyaregulation is destructive
    2. Save your social and romantic people who can reciprocate- healthy relationships to heal your trauma
    -if you have bad rel can block the progress
    -choose people who are available
    -seeing love where no love more than just crumbs
    3. Get off rel wc is destructive - abandonment wound
    -intense emotion, abandandoment
    4.

  • @michaelshifflette
    @michaelshifflette Před 10 měsíci +1

    I think CPTSD has given me the ability to judge a person and if they are a liar or not.

  • @GinaMFlorida
    @GinaMFlorida Před 20 dny

    I've had grand mal seizures since age 6. I'm 60 yrs old and started having pseudo seizures around age 50 due to CPTSD. I'm having to take therapy very slowly.
    Your videos are so very informative. I answered yes to all the symptoms except one. Life isn't fair, however this really is unfair that we should be going through this when it's no fault of our own.

  • @vanessapetrea2490
    @vanessapetrea2490 Před 7 měsíci +2

    We can’t make anyone feel any way. We all are responsible for our own feelings. This is at 20:02 in the video. We can say we’re sorry our connections weren’t sooner for them, and we are here now. Codependency is being responsible for everyone’s feelings, and we are not. That’s also part of CPTSD, and being blamed for everything as a child. We aren’t to blame.

  • @wandaprubant2082
    @wandaprubant2082 Před rokem +11

    I love this womans honesty and authenticity, van really relate.

  • @elizabethalexander6528
    @elizabethalexander6528 Před 7 měsíci +1

    I am 61 and its been the last 8 years that I have been supporting myself and focus on me.

  • @paulpgoddard76
    @paulpgoddard76 Před 3 měsíci

    "Feeling your feelings is important, but feeling your dysregulation is destructive." 4:21
    Thank God this was said.
    Another good one by Dan Harmon: "Emotions are real, but they aren't reality."

  • @user-bs4nr8jk9n
    @user-bs4nr8jk9n Před 5 měsíci +2

    I had aunts and uncles that were Catholic priests and nuns. It ran deep in my abusive family. My father’s sister, my aunt was a Catholic nun. My parents always abused us kids - all my childhood was abusive in many many ways - and my parents always hid this from everyone - all the time - but us kids knew it. My aunt would come to our house and dozens of times - pull me into a room - alone and tell me what wonderful parents I have - and how much God loved me and how lucky I was to have them. She was totally clueless and all it did was shame me more and sadden me more. Even God was mocking me. When she died I felt no sadness. When my parents died I felt no sadness. It just felt strange. And still does. Sorry to offend anyone. I don't want to hurt anyone.

    • @ShintogaDeathAngel
      @ShintogaDeathAngel Před 5 měsíci +1

      Many of us understand and aren’t offended or hurt.
      I’m not sure your aunt was as clueless as you think, however. She likely did see, but instead of stepping up to defend you, as an adult should have, she was trying to gaslight and silence you from the sound of it.
      I also felt nothing but relief when my adoptive father passed, nothing when his parents passed, and not sure how I’ll feel when adoptive mother passes, but probably will be similar. Some people would definitely be offended by that, but acknowledging it really helps.

  • @solestellamaebabas9933
    @solestellamaebabas9933 Před 10 měsíci +4

    Im grateful to my friend who gave me your channel. This is such a great help to me since I'm dealing with my traumas now. Im always a victim of abuse and betrayal from my family experiences and from my own broken marriage. Im really trying to cope up from all of my traumas. You are an angel to all of us, thank you!! ❤❤❤

  • @peichunlin1122
    @peichunlin1122 Před 4 měsíci +1

    I can still hear some pain in your voice. Takes a lot of courage to heal and stand up for oneself when someone has been through childhood abuse. Thank you for your amazing work! ❤

  • @kimp7977
    @kimp7977 Před rokem +2

    I feel it in my chest and then my skin gets hot and then.....
    ... no control I explode and there is No Stopping the explosion!

  • @znowicotton5176
    @znowicotton5176 Před 6 měsíci +3

    Thank you for being you. We need people who live and experience what they teach, and we can feel that you truly know what you say.

  • @YellowTreeB
    @YellowTreeB Před 3 měsíci

    So many key points here- how to behave socially, manners, how to plan your life, find your passions and nurture them…..

  • @roxanes43
    @roxanes43 Před 6 měsíci +2

    So glad I found you, as a former feral girl still trying to learn life in my 50s 😮, your advice really resonates!

  • @brca1853
    @brca1853 Před rokem +3

    After my abandonment malounge three years after I got cancer. To try to be a good person and to have relations with good people is such a good advice, thank you

  • @traceybennett6236
    @traceybennett6236 Před 2 měsíci

    thank you for your information, i am 41 learning about why i have cptsd... mental health told me i was bpd but it didnt sit right.. soon as my narc mother told me my stepdad got cptsd from arguing (he went crazy) i began to learn about complex ... it hits me soo hard. i was abused and scapegoated all the the time.. 'idiot' 'dumbass' and physical abuse from both parents..y real dad comit suicide after arguing soo much with her so i put it all together.. she was the prob and its sooooo sad.. i feel soo bad for her like a trapped child. and tbh her parents had to have subjected her to abuse as well.. i can not hate but cus of her i grew up around her being enabled and then i wemt on to bad partners.. i was very codependant and i ended up becoming songle and i have noticed aoo much like an eye opener..
    its true we can heal

    • @traceybennett6236
      @traceybennett6236 Před 2 měsíci

      meant i cant hate her because shes a narc.. she had a hard life too but now its 0 contact for anyone since the covid/vax thing. i dont need any more bs my children need a present healthy mother.. i chose my children over them

  • @sweetesthawaiianprincess8086

    Be Charitable, honest, not crap fitting to those more dysfunctional or disinterested, kind and not critical which opens to a self-negative path!!! GENEROSITY of SPIRIT‼️❤️👍🏻 ELEGANCE is not dumping and pointing out the others flaws- own your own stuff and avoid hurting the other. Self regulation with self respecting boundaries 👍🏻🥰‼️Anna, sounds like we both relived and relived and relived our traumatic childhood on the couch in long term psychoanalysis😳/

  • @SenoritxJaneDiamond
    @SenoritxJaneDiamond Před rokem +14

    Thank you so much!! I have these symptoms and I just want to heal so thank you💗💗💗

  • @livelearnandgrow5422
    @livelearnandgrow5422 Před rokem +1

    When my last husband left me, I went crazy. I didn’t know there was a name for what I was going through. I didn’t know I had post traumatic stress disorder. The episode was so terrible. I feel bad about it now, but I cut them up really bad it was bad. it took years for me to get stable and learn to love myself. Now I’m able to let of people that’s harmful to me.
    My last break up when the guy didn’t show up and just ghost me and it’s been two years now he still go see me I didn’t flip out. I felt the pain I recognized what was going on with me and I release them with love if only I had this CZcams channel when I was growing up to listen to you I would’ve been a much healthier person.

  • @clarksondarling
    @clarksondarling Před rokem +2

    I shut down all of my emotions for years including major major traumas. . Now I'm in trouble

  • @bipolarcollie
    @bipolarcollie Před 7 měsíci +1

    As a aging baby boomer, I've known about cptsd all my life. Before it had a name & doctors blew everything off. But I live with it every day.
    What fascinates me most is how differently it manifestz in my large sibling group. Each of us is different yet we experienced it together (the first five of us were botn in less than six years.
    I'm pretty much the only one who speaks of it and who works at processing it all. Pretty hard when half are in near total denial and the will rarely talk about it but always seem to be waiting to be smote by a bolt of lightning.
    I mostly maintained my sanity by moving away for almost 30 years. Now, I feel like Covid has been a blessing - i can avoid them and isolate. There's peace in bring alone.

  • @michaelholtzman1463
    @michaelholtzman1463 Před 8 měsíci +3

    Honestly, I can't thank you enough for your time and commitment. Your work and videos have been an unbeatable resource for me.

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 8 měsíci

      I'm so happy to hear that! Thank you for sharing, I'm sure Anna will appreciate this :) -Calista@TeamFairy

  • @lynneivison5773
    @lynneivison5773 Před rokem +2

    Gosh can it also be acknowledged that people who begin working on themselves are not necessarily healthy just beginning to make changes - that is all.

  • @danabennett4098
    @danabennett4098 Před 2 měsíci

    "it needs to be healed" - that's what really grabbed me. I've gone through therapy to heal a lot of my early childhood trauma. And I did have ONE very good therapist who helped me the most. And taught me how to do my own biofeedback to calm myself down. BUT these practical, daily things that bring me down - the clutter that builds up - NEVER had these practical things taught to me. To help ME solve these "clutter" issues around me. And yes, I even have medical PTSD because of a long illness ending in a transplant surgery - plus the loss of ALL the resources that had held me together - my condo and the neighborhood it was in, my car, two pension funds! All to pay for medical expenses. (Most common form of bankruptcy in the US now)
    But NOW my clutter of JUST the paperwork itself - I have a plan now, thanks to you! And I'm now studying the Daily Practice.
    I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH!!!!!

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před měsícem

      So glad to hear you're studying the Daily Practice! Good luck on your healing journey!
      Nika@TeamFairy

  • @stevetroxel7195
    @stevetroxel7195 Před 2 měsíci

    I’m so grateful I stumbled upon your channel ❤ my CPTSD manifested itself in my current relationship. I went down the rabbit hole of learning about attachment styles and what I learned is that is just a symptom and not the cause of my distress. I’m so happy to have a blueprint for success now. Regardless of what happens in this current relationship I want to be better and improve the most important relationship. The one with myself ❤

  • @user-sh5nl4ge3y
    @user-sh5nl4ge3y Před 2 měsíci

    I wish I've come across this or something like this many many years ago. I'm 50 and My life would have been different . I just found this chanel this morning . The understanding of why I'm like this is such a relief and so mind opening. I was diagnosed with clinical depression 9 years ago and to this day , it's still there from time to time , however ,now it's clearer . Thank you .

    • @CrappyChildhoodFairy
      @CrappyChildhoodFairy  Před 2 měsíci

      Welcome to the channel! I'm so glad you're here now :) -Calista@TeamFairy

  • @rebeccajones8628
    @rebeccajones8628 Před rokem

    Excellent video Anna.