As someone who believes in the importance of being equally yoked, the moment I realize that our core values don't align, I'll respectfully end the relationship. If our core values don't align, there's no point in continuing the process of getting to know each other. Being equally yoked is so important. I wish more people stood on that principle.
@@conversationswithadriannebrokenness, moving too fast to name a couple... I did this to myself a few years ago and after 5 years of hell and a child I have since then left.. as I began to find myself, get in therapy and pursue God. The healing began.. I would never even entertain the idea of being with someone who's unequally yoked. But it's like I was so broken it made me subconsciously desperate. Stupid to put it frankly... forcing something that I knew deep down just wasn't working... focusing only on the good to make it through. But I had to realize that having good moments doesn't make it a good relationship..it doesn't matter what a person says or what they do for you, it matters how that make you feel and when I was honest with myself I realized that even in the "good" moments I wasn't fully enjoying then because foundation was just off. There are many ways people can end up in a relationship with someone they arent equally yoked with.. this is just my story, hopefully it helps sis❤!
@@conversationswithadriannesometimes we feel we can change that person. Or base it on hope. I was guilty of that. No you're not going to agree on everything but where is the foundation?
One of the biggest cures to toxic relationships. I told so many you can not fix toxic things. You have to exit. No fixing it. No tolerance. Just leave. No matter what you have to do. What he said is so true.
@@ladyonthecoast Yes, it was! It's a decision that I have to live with for the rest of my life. My mental health is in a much better place now. You can't take care of others if you're not taking care of yourself.
@calvinmack7124 I'm glad you are in a better place now. I know going through the process feels like purgatory. You are so right, though. I have always heard it said, 'You can't give from an empty well.'
@@ladyonthecoast appreciate it! Purgatory sums it up... Overwhelmingly distraught! I didn't even have a spoon to my name. I had to find a new job/new place/rebuild everything all while finding who I am as an individual. It's definitely a mental process.
@@calvinmack7124Takes a strong person to make that decision and start from scratch pretty much. I’ve been there and am Happy you were able to find peace down the line.
Too many Godless pookies & pookieshas are new age pseudo "life coaches" who act as if they're dropping gems but it's mostly feminist, emasculated rhetoric that is purely subjective & personal or just made up to sound intelligent to get attention, applause and notoriety...💯
He is absolutely right on this 💯%. It's not easy but pray to God ut first then get yoyr money right. If yall have kids then start planning for that 2 week or 1 week on and off situation because that's coming. Don't get petty. Do it gracefully. If they wrong you, let God deal with them their absence will be one of your biggest blessings. It will hurt at first but on time you will see. There's no price on your peace 🙏
The best lesson I ever learned was realizing and accepting the FACT that I wasn't the one for my spouse. It was an epiphany, I wasn't sad, angry and had no regret. We had an amicable split. Two things can't occupy the same space at the same time, you have to be willing to simply let go to allow something else in. Ase.
Ive been to the point where there was nothing else i could do. Its the most painful thing to let someone go when you still love them but its better to in the long run
YESSUH, I AM A LIVING TESTIMONY. I STARTED WORKING ON MY EXIT PLAN IN 2006 AND IN 2007 I WAS EMBARKING ON NEW BEGINNINGS. NOW LIVING ON THE OTHER SIDE OF JOY, HAPPINESS, PEACE, SAFETY & PRIVACY IS NOT UP FOR NEGOTIATION.
I whole heartedly agree!!! Once I noticed that he did not care about hiding that he was talking to other women around me and the resentment was very loud. I started my exit plan. At first I was scared because all the fears ran rampant in my mind about all the what ifs but then I realized that I had the upper hand because i built up both of us. I was the driven one, the educated one and the brains behind our success! I packed all my stuff in my cargo van and bounced!!!! Not even a week later he called me because he was fired from the job I did his resume to help him get. It was then that I realized he only wanted the access I provided him. I stayed in that relationship 5 years too long. I left him in 2019, I been on the up and things for him haven’t been working out. Just like Trip said I was in that window of there’s nothing more I could or was wiling to do!!!! At that point I had to show up for me!!!
Exit plan I have been advising everyone about having a exit plan for years. I learned this 20yrs ago in my own situation having a exit plan from any good or bad situations is a must. being able to protect ones own agenda is paramount to your ability to grow up and fly right. Be easy my friends 🎉🎉
Real Talk Plain Simple Facts: 💯 Lenny Williams' song sound very good but it also turned men into stalkers but if somebody Dnt want U, let them go. Be Bless Not Stress & work on you
I did just that! First, I made my ex fiance believe I was afraid to leave. Then I repeatedly told him how much I loved him and he was hurting me. He was never home and I blew his phone up to make him believe what I said. I knew he had someone else, therefore he wouldn't call my bluff. I did this for 2 months. The night before I moved out, I told him I was leaving that morning. That morning was his payday and I knew he wouldn't be home. By 1230pm, I was moved out! He called me at 430pm and repeatedly said, I can't believe you actually moved out. Nothing he could say could convince me to come back. The woman broke up with him 2 months after I left. He had the nerve to leave a voice-mail message saying me chose the wrong woman.
Wish I'd heard these words decades ago. 33 years in a marriage, two good people not good for each other. Dedication and commitment is a good thing, if they are a part of growth and progress, they are incredibly damaging when they are a part of maintaning something unhealthy. Now separate, we are both growing, in different directions of course. Wish her the best, but our paths are diverged now.
Now all theses lady will go home and say "it not because u cant it because u wont yep and thats what yo problem is u never step up for me, u never be a man cause u dont want to, u never this is that." #1 of ladies is listening to other people.
After dating for a few months and realizing that he wasn’t over his ex while feeding me “the trajectory we are on is for you to be my lady” I simply made a mental note and had an end date.
This message is for black men that you should have an exit plan as early as the first half year of your relationship to mitigate losses if the break up so happens.
Yeah when I was in them moments and understood there's nothing else I can show this individual with my presence had to give him my absence...mental health is very important
I’m in a shitty toxic one sided relationship and this shit is mentally tough. This woman can vent to me about whatever she going through or how she feels about me. However, the moment I express how I feel or vent to this woman I get interrupted, she’s passive aggressive, and highly defensive. So I’m at point just cut ties and be along fuck love
Spoken Truthfully as well as elegantly....we all understand that peace in any type of relationship is needed in order for it to work and be wholesome individuals.❤❤❤❤❤❤
He is spot on. I know someone who's marriage is like that. They are steadily sticking around with each other on a effed up marriage. There has been multiple cheating, limited communication. They're putting on a act to their congregation and some family. They Stupid and it's irkin me
My advice:Some ppl require a lil patience and end up changing as a better person/spirit. Trust me i kno. But that is a rare cause tho. It can happen also depends on the person💯
I wouldn’t know…….I’ve never left a relationship, situation-ship, fling etc. the other person checked out before I did and i responded. Whether they didn’t keep things going, left for another, or just down right disrespectful……I wasn’t ever the first to get up and leave.
Each person and relationship is dif. If u all stop treating a man or a woman like they are every man or woman. And acknowledge them intently as an individual. And your relationship as unique and stop taking advice from whoever then it will go farther.
Back story: Son makes breakfast in the morning and leaves a mess in the kitchen; dad takes son to school every morning after walking the dog. I want dad (my husband) to make sure that our son cleans up his mess before leaving the house. Husband: "How do I make sure that he cleans up his mess if I'm asleep?" (he's not sleep, he wakes our son up). Me: "You smell the food he's cooking, you know he's gotta clean it up." Him: "My brain don't work that way." Me: "So you're saying that your brain don't work that way and you can't tell our son to clean up his mess after making breakfast?" Him: "Why you make that sound negative?" How do I make this sound positive?
I don’t think “making it sound positive” is the issue here. Y’all have a communication problem, and these little things are only going to get worse. He might be stubborn or whatever else, just take your time, calmly and non-combatively, without emotions, have a conversation about how to solve the problem. Compromise if you have to. It’s hard to argue with someone who doesn’t want to argue Rn you’re arguing about smelling food and waking up and that isn’t taking you nowhere
@@rtj2397where did you read that she asked the husband to clean it up? she specifically said the husband needs to make sure the son cleans up.. did you just want to respond without actually reading?
As someone who believes in the importance of being equally yoked, the moment I realize that our core values don't align, I'll respectfully end the relationship. If our core values don't align, there's no point in continuing the process of getting to know each other. Being equally yoked is so important. I wish more people stood on that principle.
Amen!!
Amen! Facts
Genuine question: how would a person get in a relationship with a person whose core values aren't aligned with theirs?
@@conversationswithadriannebrokenness, moving too fast to name a couple... I did this to myself a few years ago and after 5 years of hell and a child I have since then left.. as I began to find myself, get in therapy and pursue God. The healing began.. I would never even entertain the idea of being with someone who's unequally yoked. But it's like I was so broken it made me subconsciously desperate. Stupid to put it frankly... forcing something that I knew deep down just wasn't working... focusing only on the good to make it through. But I had to realize that having good moments doesn't make it a good relationship..it doesn't matter what a person says or what they do for you, it matters how that make you feel and when I was honest with myself I realized that even in the "good" moments I wasn't fully enjoying then because foundation was just off. There are many ways people can end up in a relationship with someone they arent equally yoked with.. this is just my story, hopefully it helps sis❤!
@@conversationswithadriannesometimes we feel we can change that person. Or base it on hope. I was guilty of that. No you're not going to agree on everything but where is the foundation?
Nothing more that I can do or Nothing more that I am willing to do 🔥🔥🔥🔥. Ohhhh weeee 🙌🏽🙌🏽 he speaking facts.
I will love to have coffee and conversation with this brother. Tapping into other intellectual mindsets is a deep interest right now.
Why coffee..to funn
I love Tripp and Ms. Kittie!
Been having these conversations with him for over a decade and I'm glad other people get to hear these thoughts.
@@rodneytimpson1608stop 😂😂
He's big on accountability. Can you handle that ?
Tripp is a very intelligent man..
Every time I hear him speak,he always makes my antennas rise up..
Much respect & Thank you Tripp 🫡💯!
What's his full name?
tripp fontaine. he has a "Ted Talk" out there that's just as good as you get here. one thing for sure, he's always on.@@user-gr7js8zj3u
He Said, "Just Go On Ahead and Start Working On Your Exit Plan" Spot On✨🎯💯🙏🏽
One of the biggest cures to toxic relationships. I told so many you can not fix toxic things. You have to exit. No fixing it. No tolerance. Just leave. No matter what you have to do. What he said is so true.
At the end of my marriage I was emotionally depleted... I just woke up one day and left....no plan.
Sometimes its just time to go.
That's the hardest decision to make.
@@ladyonthecoast Yes, it was!
It's a decision that I have to live with for the rest of my life.
My mental health is in a much better place now.
You can't take care of others if you're not taking care of yourself.
@calvinmack7124 I'm glad you are in a better place now. I know going through the process feels like purgatory. You are so right, though. I have always heard it said, 'You can't give from an empty well.'
@@ladyonthecoast appreciate it! Purgatory sums it up... Overwhelmingly distraught!
I didn't even have a spoon to my name.
I had to find a new job/new place/rebuild everything all while finding who I am as an individual.
It's definitely a mental process.
@@calvinmack7124Takes a strong person to make that decision and start from scratch pretty much. I’ve been there and am
Happy you were able to find peace down the line.
Word
From the moment you can’t be yourself any more, time to go.
I agree with the brother
❤
Too many Godless pookies & pookieshas are new age pseudo "life coaches" who act as if they're dropping gems but it's mostly feminist, emasculated rhetoric that is purely subjective & personal or just made up to sound intelligent to get attention, applause and notoriety...💯
That hit home for me, especially the situation I am right now😮😮
Wow! Me too!
Man what.
Facts! Me too😢
Me three!
Me too 😢
He is absolutely right on this 💯%. It's not easy but pray to God ut first then get yoyr money right. If yall have kids then start planning for that 2 week or 1 week on and off situation because that's coming. Don't get petty. Do it gracefully. If they wrong you, let God deal with them their absence will be one of your biggest blessings. It will hurt at first but on time you will see. There's no price on your peace 🙏
REAL TALK!! Stop wasting people time. Stop wasting your time!! You can't get it back!!
Facts! Like he said, "Even if it's you!"
The best lesson I ever learned was realizing and accepting the FACT that I wasn't the one for my spouse. It was an epiphany, I wasn't sad, angry and had no regret. We had an amicable split. Two things can't occupy the same space at the same time, you have to be willing to simply let go to allow something else in. Ase.
When the respect is not longer there when you see you are nothing for them. Thank you for always inviting me to leave relationships.
That's Husband Right There 🙌🏼👑❤🏆👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Ive been to the point where there was nothing else i could do. Its the most painful thing to let someone go when you still love them but its better to in the long run
YESSUH, I AM A LIVING TESTIMONY. I STARTED WORKING ON MY EXIT PLAN IN 2006 AND IN 2007 I WAS EMBARKING ON NEW BEGINNINGS. NOW LIVING ON THE OTHER SIDE OF JOY, HAPPINESS, PEACE, SAFETY & PRIVACY IS NOT UP FOR NEGOTIATION.
Never regret doing what's best for yourself Never settle for less than what you deserve in life.great message ❤
This was a clear direct message from my ancestors!!
I whole heartedly agree!!! Once I noticed that he did not care about hiding that he was talking to other women around me and the resentment was very loud. I started my exit plan. At first I was scared because all the fears ran rampant in my mind about all the what ifs but then I realized that I had the upper hand because i built up both of us. I was the driven one, the educated one and the brains behind our success! I packed all my stuff in my cargo van and bounced!!!! Not even a week later he called me because he was fired from the job I did his resume to help him get. It was then that I realized he only wanted the access I provided him. I stayed in that relationship 5 years too long. I left him in 2019, I been on the up and things for him haven’t been working out. Just like Trip said I was in that window of there’s nothing more I could or was wiling to do!!!! At that point I had to show up for me!!!
man is speaking truth and I know it's hard fellas but we gotta keep it real with ourselves and understand life on earth is too short.
I love listening to and being around intelligent people. This brother right here is exactly that!
Scared to be LONELY 😭😭
Sometimes you're in a bad relationship and still lonely.
@@mignalyortiz4589 TRUTH!!
People easily forget, ONE is a whole number....
You can be in a relationship or marriage & still be lonely.
@@gashafashi08 TRUE
This man is a gold mind when it comes to articulating emotion fr, love hearing him break it down so effortlessly.
He’s always on point!!! 💯 💯
I like that he is not animated and when he talk it’s calming.
I love him still but I could not stay it was a requirement to leave and a demand to never go back. We hav to make choices in life.
Exit plan I have been advising everyone about having a exit plan for years. I learned this 20yrs ago in my own situation having a exit plan from any good or bad situations is a must. being able to protect ones own agenda is paramount to your ability to grow up and fly right. Be easy my friends 🎉🎉
Alot of this makes sense however people can grow through their immaturity together. So not everyone should move in this way. Js
The truth🙌☝️💞 ..Wisdom at it's finest 💎💥
Ask yaself those questions, NOT OTHA FOLKS‼️✔💯
He is speaking the TRUTH 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
I could talk and listen to this man 24/7 🙌🏽🙌🏽
This is why if you're not married, you have no business living together.
Bruh seemed to be chatting with me….. Relationships can be work and not everyone can handle it’s reality🙏🏾💯
Amen my brotha you better tell it 💯.
💯 resonated with my past!
"If you cannot show up in your relationship healthy and wholehearted, you need to leave." That's it.
Key 🔑 words, can do or willing to do. ❤🙏🏾
Preach Sir Amen!
Thanks for the advice, needed that because I myself I'm in that situation.
AMEN THANK YOU ❤❤❤
Always be ready✊🏾 I totally agree
Maaaan I really needed to hear that!
Real talk 💯
Real shit 💯
Dang you don’t even know how much I needed to hear this. ❤
He speak with such passion and meaning
FACTS 🌬 💯🎯🔥
This is the guy that made me subscribe to this channel actually ❤
No one will be able to prosper in life if they are in a stuck or stagnant position, they will fail in any relationship they come across.
Real Talk Plain Simple Facts: 💯 Lenny Williams' song sound very good but it also turned men into stalkers but if somebody Dnt want U, let them go. Be Bless Not Stress & work on you
Thats real sht 💯
I needed this 💯💯 Facts Tripp. Yes it's time for a escape plan 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽. Thank you so much for this advice Tripp 💋
I did just that! First, I made my ex fiance believe I was afraid to leave. Then I repeatedly told him how much I loved him and he was hurting me. He was never home and I blew his phone up to make him believe what I said. I knew he had someone else, therefore he wouldn't call my bluff. I did this for 2 months. The night before I moved out, I told him I was leaving that morning. That morning was his payday and I knew he wouldn't be home. By 1230pm, I was moved out! He called me at 430pm and repeatedly said, I can't believe you actually moved out. Nothing he could say could convince me to come back. The woman broke up with him 2 months after I left. He had the nerve to leave a voice-mail message saying me chose the wrong woman.
I love your videos because everything you say is very relatable. I would like to see you write a book.
love this man so knowledgeable
Well said
There was nothing more that I wanted to do. 😎✌🏾after 30 yrs.
he is a beautiful being
This !! I need this !!
Straight facts start making a exit plans to move cause it’s getting a bit to much for me now👍🏾
No truer words could have been said.
He's right!!
CORRECT I DID THAT ASAP 👑🙏🏽👑💯🎯👸🏽🎯💯🎯🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️
Wish I'd heard these words decades ago. 33 years in a marriage, two good people not good for each other. Dedication and commitment is a good thing, if they are a part of growth and progress, they are incredibly damaging when they are a part of maintaning something unhealthy. Now separate, we are both growing, in different directions of course. Wish her the best, but our paths are diverged now.
My heart has left and my feet will follow. As soon as we finish this last biz project, i am gone...keeping it cordial until then...
Now all theses lady will go home and say "it not because u cant it because u wont yep and thats what yo problem is u never step up for me, u never be a man cause u dont want to, u never this is that." #1 of ladies is listening to other people.
Definitely nothing more that I can do and nothing more that I'm willing to do. Time to move on. This too shall pass. Self love is the best love. ❤
After dating for a few months and realizing that he wasn’t over his ex while feeding me “the trajectory we are on is for you to be my lady” I simply made a mental note and had an end date.
You could see dude in the audience crumble... I hope he makes the right decision for himself... 🙏🏾
Well said
This message is for black men that you should have an exit plan as early as the first half year of your relationship to mitigate losses if the break up so happens.
😂😂
The message is for the gender who don't take accountability for their actions
@@bashsnk1 there is a gender called fools?^^
Yeah when I was in them moments and understood there's nothing else I can show this individual with my presence had to give him my absence...mental health is very important
Dang,that hit bro hard, you can tell he’s like damn I gotta start packing when I get home.
Current situation 😏 Exit plan Is activated 🙏🏾
God i love Tripp....❤
That's some wisdom he just spoke.
So true!!
I’m in a shitty toxic one sided relationship and this shit is mentally tough. This woman can vent to me about whatever she going through or how she feels about me. However, the moment I express how I feel or vent to this woman I get interrupted, she’s passive aggressive, and highly defensive. So I’m at point just cut ties and be along fuck love
Shes emotionally unavailable or narcissist sometimes its both
Tripp just trips me out w the wealth of knowledge this young man spits. Is it more so from experience or educational background?
Spoken Truthfully as well as elegantly....we all understand that peace in any type of relationship is needed in order for it to work and be wholesome individuals.❤❤❤❤❤❤
I think as men we need to be able to be alone and it be healthy not from anger or disappointment but to better ourselves
I know that is right! I love God and I love me! I don't need and want the drama! AND NOW LIFE IS GREAT!
Is there a full video of this conversation? Where can I watch it?
He is spot on. I know someone who's marriage is like that. They are steadily sticking around with each other on a effed up marriage. There has been multiple cheating, limited communication. They're putting on a act to their congregation and some family. They Stupid and it's irkin me
💯💯💯
Can someone please tell me where is the full video or live stream?
💯
1000% AGREE!!
Real talk
My advice:Some ppl require a lil patience and end up changing as a better person/spirit. Trust me i kno. But that is a rare cause tho. It can happen also depends on the person💯
This is so true
I wouldn’t know…….I’ve never left a relationship, situation-ship, fling etc. the other person checked out before I did and i responded. Whether they didn’t keep things going, left for another, or just down right disrespectful……I wasn’t ever the first to get up and leave.
This message in the wrong hands is actually dangerous
Know when someone is not worrhy 0f you and trust me Gee
You got cha answer right there
Each person and relationship is dif. If u all stop treating a man or a woman like they are every man or woman. And acknowledge them intently as an individual. And your relationship as unique and stop taking advice from whoever then it will go farther.
Facts!!!
Respectfully❤
AMEN
Back story: Son makes breakfast in the morning and leaves a mess in the kitchen; dad takes son to school every morning after walking the dog. I want dad (my husband) to make sure that our son cleans up his mess before leaving the house.
Husband: "How do I make sure that he cleans up his mess if I'm asleep?" (he's not sleep, he wakes our son up).
Me: "You smell the food he's cooking, you know he's gotta clean it up."
Him: "My brain don't work that way."
Me: "So you're saying that your brain don't work that way and you can't tell our son to clean up his mess after making breakfast?"
Him: "Why you make that sound negative?"
How do I make this sound positive?
I don’t think “making it sound positive” is the issue here. Y’all have a communication problem, and these little things are only going to get worse. He might be stubborn or whatever else, just take your time, calmly and non-combatively, without emotions, have a conversation about how to solve the problem. Compromise if you have to. It’s hard to argue with someone who doesn’t want to argue
Rn you’re arguing about smelling food and waking up and that isn’t taking you nowhere
Tell your son to clean up. Why are you asking your husband to do it?
@@rtj2397Because a lot of women are more interested how they want it to happen rather than the ultimate result!
@@rtj2397where did you read that she asked the husband to clean it up? she specifically said the husband needs to make sure the son cleans up.. did you just want to respond without actually reading?
@@jas1565 same thing apple pie face. Did you just want to respond?