“They will eventually shoot themselves in the door” that’s a word from God right there. The narcissist entire gameplay is to over react until you react so they can play victim.
I beat one in court by staying calm and dropping the receipts. Save all your conversations sometimes i would take screen shots an send to a folder in my email name custody so if i lost my phone i have all the proof
What kind of conversations where they? My fiance is trying to get custody of his son and has texts between the mother and his son with the text say "you know why I didn't want to come, your DRUNK" Do you think stuff like that would help his case?
@morganmuldoon most definitely. Save all arguments concerning the child and parenting. You will need it as proof to counter what the other person is claiming. You never know what they will come up with, especially if you are dealing with a narcissist. Even if it's petty arguments, it will show a lack of ability to coparent, communicate about small matter hence making sole custody a valid option etc, and also give props where it's due because the judge will highly respect that. Save all your screenshots, documents, and pictures in one folder and save as you go to make it easier when you are ready to submit information because it can get chaotic. Hope that helps.
True. Evidence is SUPER important. Video, screenshots, audio, even keeping a handwritten notebook of the B.S. helps. Best advice I ever got. Also staying calm. Half my court dates end up with the narcissist going nuts, the judge threatening to throw them out, and everyone else rolling their eyes.
This is excellent, thank you. As someone who has had my son taken away just because my wealthy ex didn’t want to pay child support anymore, it is so incredibly hard to NOT REACT. But you are EXACTLY RIGHT - that is the best action - do not reply! Do not respond! Because yes, the court will label you as “crazy” just like an abuser does. They push you and say you are unstable. You must not take the bait. After a year in court, I finally really have learned this lesson. The abuser FEEDS off of seeing you upset. It’s like starving a monster. Starve the monster!!
I wished i knew this before all my journal with the family courts. I broke emotionally in court because when I thought about what our daughter had seen what her mom done to me in front my daughter when I try to explain the events to the court. I am a man who married an immigrant who Is an attorney herself, but not practicing in the states who also is a Narcissist. I got asked twice if I was on medication by first of a hearing officer and second when the judge asked me when I was showing a little emotions. It’s not that I nuts or nothing, I been through a lot of gaslighting and deflection and all that a Narcissistic has to offer. I don’t know if I hurt myself by doing this, but I am only a creature of God and like every man and woman, we was all built with those emotions. I found out from an attorney 7 weeks ago that the clerks of courts are purposely sabotaging me case (I have this attorney on audio explaining this to me) and allot of fraud where for one, I filed for a divorce Nov 2021 in a deferent town. She challenged domicile because I moved to another town with in the 6 month rule, and She challenged venue of convince because here whole life is still back in our marital town. She won the venue of convince, lost the domicile issue. My attorney at the time gave venue to the court of the marital town. My wife (no my ex) enrolled my in Title IV-D and in August 2022, and as I was sitting in (I Think) my first appearance with the enforcement, I got served with her divorce papers. I was very puzzled why I am getting served with her divorce papers when I filed first. I did not have an attorney at that time and I really don’t want one. I’ve been holding the Title IV-D against the wall a little bit, but they’re not letting go they’re grip on me. I already recused the fake judge on the non-support case this pass May 19th. So far with all the evidence I have (I’m talking about texts, 4 years of my journal of the daily events between the wife and me, allot of audios) that I can prove she used me to get into the country, I can prove her intent was to set herself up through me and then drop the hammer on me, I can prove (if the courts will listen and examen evidence) this Narcissism, I can prove our daughter was severely getting coerced by her mom, I can prove alienation (not physical, but emotionally and psychologically) and had mentioned a few details about all this in documents to the courts to pop the red flags with this. I even got physically assaulted by her 4 times already (unprovoked) and of those 4… 3 was witnessed by my our daughter, but she tells me all this is in me head. But with all this I have, the court wasn’t taking interests in it. It’s like, I am being ignored. I was a single parent to my first daughter when she was a child and starting when she was 7.5 years old. As a single parent dad raising a daughter is not easy because you really got to build a trust bond with them (And i did). Today shes 33 years old and we’re very close. Since I didn’t see the court raising concerns over what I was describing what our daughter and I was going through at the hands of her mom, I asked an attorney to look into my case. I was very surprised and afraid at the same time what he told me… I did not retain him officially, but just asked him to dig. This was in July I asked him. On August 31st of this year, we met face to face and first thing he told me was, “ok, alright dude, let me just tell you this, i don’t know whats going on with your chit, but your file is FK up, you know that? You know how bad? (he continued as I was trying to say something) ok, I tell you whats going on, from the beginning, I’m about half way through till now. You can’t look chit up by date, it’s all wrong. (Something he said) transposed. There is no (On the recording when he was explains exactly what it was, the background noise hampered clarity what he was explaining until he spoke a little louder at this point) no wonder you can’t find anything. She was trying to find additional (un intelligible). It appears to her (he’s talking about another clerk that was helping him find files on my cases) that was intentional. At this point I was explaining to him, “when I file something, I always get a copy and ask the clerk to time and date stamp the copy with her wet ink signature on it (he cuts in and explains again what it is, but the background noise and him talking a little low, you cant hear what he says and my editor can’t take out the background noise) the entered incorrectly and they probably entered it incorrectly as far as she is concern on purpose (he was talking about the clerk that was helping him) it’s sabotage… He was mentioning about dates, and something about it not correctly indexing I think is the word he used. Now, since then, he has been ignoring me, I do not know what to do or go for help too initiate an inquiry or investigation of this matter with this clerks and no one wants to help. What to do? Get railroaded by the courts? Or fight back and how to fight back when no one wants to do the honest right thing with all this corruption and fraud that people are doing to innocent people. Yeah, I wished I would of shown my emotions in court. I think thats the least of my worries.
There was allot that he uncovered and I found out through him that my divorce petition that I filed first in November of 2021 was not found in this court at all. We’re suppose to be on my petition of divorce, not the now ex wife petition. How this happened?
I'm dealing with similar issues right now,my husband is saying he is fighting for custody and I know it's over child support originally,so I decided to sign off on child support,now he wants to claim them on taxes and honestly just hurt me,he def doesn't want the responsibility of raising our children,he never did,also he is manipulative and mentally abusive to the children,but the only proof I have is from the children and I refuse to put them in a position to go against their father,whom they love regardless of his actions
I'm in such a different place than a year ago. I was emotional, now I don't even respond to the hate filled messages. However, our child is still in the midst of the hate coming from the other side, which does make things difficult
This is great. Nothing is more important to me than my children. Fellas, ladies, listen to this lady. I did exactly this and I’m going to get custody of my 7 and 6 year old very soon. Everything she’s saying is right. Thank you for this video. The legal system was the only way for my case. She’s going to jail, and it’s her own fault. The legal system is doing great for me, I have a great attorney, glory to god.
It can be tough as hell being a single dad... I talk about my own struggles/dealing with child support on my channel if you think it’ll help you. Keep your head up and fight. 🤝
We may not have the same kind of outward emotional reaction, but it's because we're terrified. All we can think about is, "What if they believe her?" and we will be non-reactive to a fault.
In court? 10 to 15 years ago, when I was dealing my lying, narcissist, alienating ex, our "court" didn't care about the damaging affects of my ex's tactics with the evidence I had. I couldn't find a lawyer that would help me. But I had no problem finding a funeral home to help out when our son committed suicide from all the alienating damage my ex did.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that, and so sorry for your son 🙏🕊️🌹 I was treated like that too ,the court system where I live didn't care about anything I had, even having proof . But God help me get my house back and Full Custody of my 6 Children,only because my Ex Narc didn't want to take care of 6 Children. But he only sees them 2 times a month and that's ok. My Narc still hasn't paid child support, he quit his job. But I'm sure he will have something up his sleeve to cause me pain and suffering. He's like a thorn in my side. But I'm a fighter , even though he's caused me PTSD and the Children are going through Trauma with his manipulation and lies. I pray to God every night ,that it will get better. 🙏
Thank you thank you THANK YOU for continuing to do what you do and being a great person. I don't mean to open old wounds but you and your late husband have helped me threw the hardest time in my life. I have narcissist victims syndrome (I'm a survivor and thriver not a victim) and your videos give me solus. Thank you for your kindness and affirming words of help and self reflection of myself.
This has been so helpful. I am currently going through this with an toxic narcissistic alcoholic violent mother trying to gain legal access to my child. Thankyou...
This is SO GOOD, Tammy, thank you! In our situation, when Dad has not responded to high conflict Ex, she’s threatened to keep the child from him because “your lack of response makes me not trust you.” Instead of getting emotional, the dad learned to get small and shut down. This pattern showed up in mediation, unfortunately. I love the specific tip you give here of saying “you know that’s not true.” I’ve passed this video along to the dad to help start the strengthening process. I would so love to see him start speaking to his son’s mom from a place of empowerment instead of fear. You’re truly a godsend, Tammy.
“From a place of empowerment instead of fear” is so perfect. That was me for almost 2 years. Now I’m close to getting full custody of both. Tell him find a good attorney
Thank you for everything that you were saying it is extremely knowledgeable I am actively going through the worst situation of my life... My children have been taken by their father against court orders on bogus accusations and this has been going on for 5 years and it has cost my children the personality they could have had who they would have been he has taken away their whole family on my side.... I live in Aurora Colorado and I am currently going through the Arapahoe court system and he has lied consistently on court papers and I'm just so it's so hard for me because I'm a literate with the court systems and I don't even do computers I like not having this knowledge is the death of me and my children and that is a butterfly effect of a lot a hurt going on in this society
Mine was more invested in being a victim. It was easier to smear me behind my back and garner sympathy. Just had to push him to sign off on the divorce decree & the custody was included in that. He could've cared less about thus children, except for parading them around looking like father if the year.
Please we need help, my daughter has never been married to baby daddy, her daughter was taken from our home for a weeks visit, we got custody order done in courthouse sent to him he threw them away. Judge in Dade city Florida did nothing to help. He moved in with a girlfriend and is not revealing her daughters location or allowed her to see her daughter for almost a year. My daughter is in school on deans list to be a pharmacy technician. How do we as a family help her. Please she is so heartbroken. Also she has a two year old son with her fiance and he cries for his sister. What can we do we just moved to Texas to our forever home. Please advice help 😢😢😢 is what he's doing illegal cuz it should be
Thank you. Spot on. How about a video about domestic violence but the other party has custodial rights still until court orders and court isn't listening to the claims to care for custody decisions. It's been over a year and it seems it's not getting resolved, just continued.
Going thru this right now. I was a stay at home dad and full time caregiver. After my narcissistic wife shoved me down and then tried to push me down some stairs as I was trying to flee the home from her, I told her I was filing for divorce. She went straight to the court and filed a restraining order against me, making all kinds of false allegations. I was given 15 minutes to get out of the house or face arrest. It is now over 4 months later, and thru a perfect storm of events beyond my control, I still have not been given an opportunity to present my defense. She has not presented a single witness or even the tiniest shred of evidence to support her lies. Just this morning, yet another hearing was cancelled and rescheduled, this time not until late March. That will be more than 6 months from the time I was initially served. I have multiple witnesses who were in the home and can testify as to what really happened, but witnesses are of no use when you can’t even get a day in court to present your case.
It’s crazy because I’m 22 and fighting to find my child I haven’t seen since 5 months because my baby father I’ve been with since 15 and him 21 . Took off with her after I threatened to expose him a million times to him and his family . They fought me , and I called the police because I was too “ crazy “ and couldn’t keep my composure because I’ve been FED up with them and them and I couldn’t STAND still sitting there listening to them lie to the police . There was no court order or nothing . He just left to CA while I’m stuck in GA and he ignores me and blocks me makes me wanna die at times
My daughter is going through this in court and both her rx and his mother are narcissistic, his mother has gained custody of my granddaughter. She has gotten the judge to believe everything she says. I don't know how it happened but the investigator came up with a scathing report, agreed with all the lies the grandmother said about my daughter and none of it is true so the judge will not listen to my daughter and allows the grandmother to talk over her. Its disgusting. The judge was supposed to get another investigation done and refused to order it, that was a year ago. My granddaughter wants to come home but is scared to death to go against her grandmother who has custody. Even getting a new court date is proving impossible. My daughter has proof of all the lies she's telling and how shes continually blocking visitation in so many ways yet she can't go to court to show the judge. How do you even fight all of this? People who've been helping hear about what's going on are stumped, they all say well that can't happen then it does. She served my daughter legal paperwork and it had the wrong date and time for when the custody was being determined, she signed on for the zoom meeting and was told she missed it and why the grandmother was able to get custody. Its apparently easy to add false papers in with the real ones, no one was interested in checking and since she lost custody she was told it's too late because the judge made his decision. If she tried getting her daughter back that way, it would cost over $20,000 (just to start the process) for a lawyer. Its gone downhill since and my daughter never did anything wrong or has ever been in trouble.
As a former attorney, clients never listen no matter how many times you tell them not to react. It's the children that suffer. I always put the child first in my advice and I realized most people don't love their children above their needs to get back at their ex. People say they love their kids more than anything in the world but ask them to behave in the child's best interests, and they just can't act above their own emotions. It's the same all over the world in the court system. People need to understand the court doesn't actually care - they're not there to hear your dirty laundry - as long as the child is not in danger, they don't really care what happens to your family - it's not the place to prove how virtuous you are and sling mud on your former spouse. Listen to your attorney because they actually do care and are trying to protect you (from the other party but also from yourself). I'm currently overseeing a bitter child care matter where the mother is the narcissistic parent and I feel so sorry for the child and the father. Don't allege parental alienation just because your child has made their preference for the other parent - it's a technical assessment done by a forensic psychologist who will provide a report to the court, not just an accusation you throw around. Make sure you don't cause your children to resent you. Listen and take advice from psychologists and your attorney. Don't play dirty when it comes to children because it will come back to bite you when they're older.
It is really strange how even you attorneys tell people not to record with their phones. is that because the real truth would come out and be exposed while you guys make excuses about the judge claiming that oh that might not be the full video or what did you do before that. Sorry.But if you record mom telling you that you can take your son to the mall while she takes your daughter to the dance at school and then fifteen minutes later she text messages you and says since you decided to take my son without asking I called the police and reported you for kidnapping. Guess what? I was recording when I asked her if I can take my son. But even with solid evidence like that I bet you the court your attorney and every other attorney will say that I can't use it. There's only one reason for that.Because you guys are making a fucking killing on this. The longer an attorney can drag out a case for the person he's representing the more money he makes. You are all in cahoots. The judge child custody DA and even your own attorney. Your pockets are getting fat. Prove me wrong and volunteer to help 1 person who doesn't have money for an attorney. Does anybody know of any attorney that's representing parents that actually has done this? Nope and you never will. They don't give a shit about your kids. I'll tell you right now.Removing a loving parent from the life of a child is never in the best interest of that child.I don't care what anybody says.
What if the child is 15 and has been completely turned against me (mom) sisters and even her brothers from her dad they saw through him but she seems to be so brainwashed and we had 5050 and I was the primary custodial parent and he never paid any child support and didn't see her for 6 years😢 now he's a saint
You gotta be fucking kidding me. You're saying that dad's are the ones that are usually starting shit and trying to take custody away from the mom? I have not read the The comments yet but i'm pretty sure they're going to prove you wrong on that one.
My daughters father hit me pretty bad with my 8 month old daughter in his hands and for the first time I called the police in all the times he hit me. When he got out of jail he completely left me and doesn’t want to make our family work even after I dropped the charges, and because I betrayed his trust by calling the police. So now after physically and emotionally hurting me he expects me to drop my daughter off to him when he feels like it. I’m having a hard time doing it as there is no court order in place and he can keep her since police won’t get involved. can I get in trouble for just ignoring him and his requests to see her? It’s very toxic and she’s just a little baby he’s using this to hurt me purposely. He just blames me for ruining our family I just don’t want to deal with him 😩😭 I really feel like he’s using my daughter to hit my heart. Can I just ignore him until he goes to court to get custody? Am I wrong for thinking this does this make me the narcissist ??
Therapists who specialize in p.a. unfortunately have their livelihood jeprodized by testifying in court. It's such a double bind for all of us trying to protect our children in this situation. 😢
In family court lying is perfectly acceptable, I was served with a sons with a false sworn statement of false testimony and when I arrived in court I was told not to worry about that as she had a new false aligation for me to defend myself against. Her testimony that day consisted in her explaining her emotional abuse of our son then I was told I could no longer see my children until I worked on my parenting skills. I'm sure when my son asked her why I didn't show up for our next visit she told him the truth. Right? Her name is Christie Sanford from Napa California.
Because. She isnt interested in shared parenting, you will never be equal, you will last on the list of her priorities. Shes probaby looking for income. If she says i want a partner inall ways and i will value you as an equal she might just be a keeper.
@@deathlt9623 The fact that she is spending so much time talking about it on the very first day shows that she is not ready to be in a relationship. Its nothing wrong to give them most priority. The problem is, those same people are not good with balancing life. And thats the issue.
“They will eventually shoot themselves in the door” that’s a word from God right there. The narcissist entire gameplay is to over react until you react so they can play victim.
Bro you said that......the mother thought she had control over her lies until I showed up for final judgement with receipts
When I'm right no one remembers. When I'm wrong NO ONE FORGETS.
Ditto
I beat one in court by staying calm and dropping the receipts. Save all your conversations sometimes i would take screen shots an send to a folder in my email name custody so if i lost my phone i have all the proof
What kind of conversations where they? My fiance is trying to get custody of his son and has texts between the mother and his son with the text say "you know why I didn't want to come, your DRUNK"
Do you think stuff like that would help his case?
@morganmuldoon most definitely. Save all arguments concerning the child and parenting. You will need it as proof to counter what the other person is claiming. You never know what they will come up with, especially if you are dealing with a narcissist. Even if it's petty arguments, it will show a lack of ability to coparent, communicate about small matter hence making sole custody a valid option etc, and also give props where it's due because the judge will highly respect that. Save all your screenshots, documents, and pictures in one folder and save as you go to make it easier when you are ready to submit information because it can get chaotic. Hope that helps.
True. Evidence is SUPER important. Video, screenshots, audio, even keeping a handwritten notebook of the B.S. helps. Best advice I ever got.
Also staying calm. Half my court dates end up with the narcissist going nuts, the judge threatening to throw them out, and everyone else rolling their eyes.
My favorite response " You know that's not true"
This is excellent, thank you. As someone who has had my son taken away just because my wealthy ex didn’t want to pay child support anymore, it is so incredibly hard to NOT REACT. But you are EXACTLY RIGHT - that is the best action - do not reply! Do not respond! Because yes, the court will label you as “crazy” just like an abuser does. They push you and say you are unstable. You must not take the bait. After a year in court, I finally really have learned this lesson. The abuser FEEDS off of seeing you upset. It’s like starving a monster. Starve the monster!!
I wished i knew this before all my journal with the family courts. I broke emotionally in court because when I thought about what our daughter had seen what her mom done to me in front my daughter when I try to explain the events to the court. I am a man who married an immigrant who Is an attorney herself, but not practicing in the states who also is a Narcissist. I got asked twice if I was on medication by first of a hearing officer and second when the judge asked me when I was showing a little emotions. It’s not that I nuts or nothing, I been through a lot of gaslighting and deflection and all that a Narcissistic has to offer.
I don’t know if I hurt myself by doing this, but I am only a creature of God and like every man and woman, we was all built with those emotions.
I found out from an attorney 7 weeks ago that the clerks of courts are purposely sabotaging me case (I have this attorney on audio explaining this to me) and allot of fraud where for one, I filed for a divorce Nov 2021 in a deferent town. She challenged domicile because I moved to another town with in the 6 month rule, and She challenged venue of convince because here whole life is still back in our marital town.
She won the venue of convince, lost the domicile issue. My attorney at the time gave venue to the court of the marital town. My wife (no my ex) enrolled my in Title IV-D and in August 2022, and as I was sitting in (I Think) my first appearance with the enforcement, I got served with her divorce papers. I was very puzzled why I am getting served with her divorce papers when I filed first. I did not have an attorney at that time and I really don’t want one.
I’ve been holding the Title IV-D against the wall a little bit, but they’re not letting go they’re grip on me. I already recused the fake judge on the non-support case this pass May 19th. So far with all the evidence I have (I’m talking about texts, 4 years of my journal of the daily events between the wife and me, allot of audios) that I can prove she used me to get into the country, I can prove her intent was to set herself up through me and then drop the hammer on me, I can prove (if the courts will listen and examen evidence) this Narcissism, I can prove our daughter was severely getting coerced by her mom, I can prove alienation (not physical, but emotionally and psychologically) and had mentioned a few details about all this in documents to the courts to pop the red flags with this. I even got physically assaulted by her 4 times already (unprovoked) and of those 4… 3 was witnessed by my our daughter, but she tells me all this is in me head. But with all this I have, the court wasn’t taking interests in it. It’s like, I am being ignored.
I was a single parent to my first daughter when she was a child and starting when she was 7.5 years old. As a single parent dad raising a daughter is not easy because you really got to build a trust bond with them (And i did). Today shes 33 years old and we’re very close. Since I didn’t see the court raising concerns over what I was describing what our daughter and I was going through at the hands of her mom, I asked an attorney to look into my case. I was very surprised and afraid at the same time what he told me…
I did not retain him officially, but just asked him to dig. This was in July I asked him. On August 31st of this year, we met face to face and first thing he told me was, “ok, alright dude, let me just tell you this, i don’t know whats going on with your chit, but your file is FK up, you know that? You know how bad? (he continued as I was trying to say something) ok, I tell you whats going on, from the beginning, I’m about half way through till now. You can’t look chit up by date, it’s all wrong. (Something he said) transposed. There is no (On the recording when he was explains exactly what it was, the background noise hampered clarity what he was explaining until he spoke a little louder at this point) no wonder you can’t find anything. She was trying to find additional (un intelligible). It appears to her (he’s talking about another clerk that was helping him find files on my cases) that was intentional. At this point I was explaining to him, “when I file something, I always get a copy and ask the clerk to time and date stamp the copy with her wet ink signature on it (he cuts in and explains again what it is, but the background noise and him talking a little low, you cant hear what he says and my editor can’t take out the background noise) the entered incorrectly and they probably entered it incorrectly as far as she is concern on purpose (he was talking about the clerk that was helping him) it’s sabotage…
He was mentioning about dates, and something about it not correctly indexing I think is the word he used. Now, since then, he has been ignoring me, I do not know what to do or go for help too initiate an inquiry or investigation of this matter with this clerks and no one wants to help.
What to do? Get railroaded by the courts? Or fight back and how to fight back when no one wants to do the honest right thing with all this corruption and fraud that people are doing to innocent people. Yeah, I wished I would of shown my emotions in court. I think thats the least of my worries.
There was allot that he uncovered and I found out through him that my divorce petition that I filed first in November of 2021 was not found in this court at all. We’re suppose to be on my petition of divorce, not the now ex wife petition. How this happened?
Why did you lose your son
Agree!!
I'm dealing with similar issues right now,my husband is saying he is fighting for custody and I know it's over child support originally,so I decided to sign off on child support,now he wants to claim them on taxes and honestly just hurt me,he def doesn't want the responsibility of raising our children,he never did,also he is manipulative and mentally abusive to the children,but the only proof I have is from the children and I refuse to put them in a position to go against their father,whom they love regardless of his actions
I'm in such a different place than a year ago. I was emotional, now I don't even respond to the hate filled messages. However, our child is still in the midst of the hate coming from the other side, which does make things difficult
This is great. Nothing is more important to me than my children. Fellas, ladies, listen to this lady. I did exactly this and I’m going to get custody of my 7 and 6 year old very soon. Everything she’s saying is right. Thank you for this video. The legal system was the only way for my case. She’s going to jail, and it’s her own fault. The legal system is doing great for me, I have a great attorney, glory to god.
It can be tough as hell being a single dad... I talk about my own struggles/dealing with child support on my channel if you think it’ll help you. Keep your head up and fight. 🤝
You sent the mom of your kids to jail? What did she do?
We may not have the same kind of outward emotional reaction, but it's because we're terrified. All we can think about is, "What if they believe her?" and we will be non-reactive to a fault.
In court? 10 to 15 years ago, when I was dealing my lying, narcissist, alienating ex, our "court" didn't care about the damaging affects of my ex's tactics with the evidence I had. I couldn't find a lawyer that would help me. But I had no problem finding a funeral home to help out when our son committed suicide from all the alienating damage my ex did.
Dealt with that over the past few months all the evidence and they don’t listen I just get dismissed with a “I understand”
I'm so sorry you had to go through that, and so sorry for your son 🙏🕊️🌹
I was treated like that too ,the court system where I live didn't care about anything I had, even having proof .
But God help me get my house back and Full Custody of my 6 Children,only because my Ex Narc didn't want to take care of 6 Children. But he only sees them 2 times a month and that's ok. My Narc still hasn't paid child support, he quit his job. But I'm sure he will have something up his sleeve to cause me pain and suffering. He's like a thorn in my side.
But I'm a fighter , even though he's caused me PTSD and the Children are going through Trauma with his manipulation and lies.
I pray to God every night ,that it will get better. 🙏
😢
NO the court system only cares if they have physically harmed you@@burtcharleslancaster1501
So sorry for your loss❤
Its called reactive abuse. And it should have more awareness. I get emotional as a man.
Exacty, if you react it's never forgotten and used against you.
Exactly this
Love your voice and even more your personality 😍 thanks for making these videos.
This is gold! The video I needed 5 years ago but better late than never ❤🎉
Thank you!!! Very wise advice!
Thank you so much that was very useful information. I got more help out of your video than I have in three years from others so thank you.
Thank you thank you THANK YOU for continuing to do what you do and being a great person. I don't mean to open old wounds but you and your late husband have helped me threw the hardest time in my life. I have narcissist victims syndrome (I'm a survivor and thriver not a victim) and your videos give me solus. Thank you for your kindness and affirming words of help and self reflection of myself.
You also usually have a good sense of the lies they’re going to tell.
Very interesting video i am dealing with a narcissistic 4 past 4years thanks for your advice....
Great stuff. 😊 thank you
You are amazing!!! Subscribed :)
Thank you!
So helpful! I'm so thankful for your content 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 thank you!
You are welcome! Thanks for the kind words!
Thank you so much
Love this
This has been so helpful. I am currently going through this with an toxic narcissistic alcoholic violent mother trying to gain legal access to my child. Thankyou...
This is SO GOOD, Tammy, thank you! In our situation, when Dad has not responded to high conflict Ex, she’s threatened to keep the child from him because “your lack of response makes me not trust you.” Instead of getting emotional, the dad learned to get small and shut down. This pattern showed up in mediation, unfortunately.
I love the specific tip you give here of saying “you know that’s not true.” I’ve passed this video along to the dad to help start the strengthening process. I would so love to see him start speaking to his son’s mom from a place of empowerment instead of fear. You’re truly a godsend, Tammy.
Beautifully said. It works.
“From a place of empowerment instead of fear” is so perfect. That was me for almost 2 years. Now I’m close to getting full custody of both. Tell him find a good attorney
Thank you ❤
Stoic philosophy. Love it
Talk about hitting the mail on the head. This is so accurate it’s scary lol this video should have 100,000 views at least
Thank you for everything that you were saying it is extremely knowledgeable I am actively going through the worst situation of my life... My children have been taken by their father against court orders on bogus accusations and this has been going on for 5 years and it has cost my children the personality they could have had who they would have been he has taken away their whole family on my side.... I live in Aurora Colorado and I am currently going through the Arapahoe court system and he has lied consistently on court papers and I'm just so it's so hard for me because I'm a literate with the court systems and I don't even do computers I like not having this knowledge is the death of me and my children and that is a butterfly effect of a lot a hurt going on in this society
After being taken to family court for 12 years by one of these people, I agree with this.
This is the video for me right now
Record everything.
This was excellent, can you go into domestic violence and divorce/custody with a narcissist
Mine was more invested in being a victim. It was easier to smear me behind my back and garner sympathy. Just had to push him to sign off on the divorce decree & the custody was included in that. He could've cared less about thus children, except for parading them around looking like father if the year.
Facts
Please we need help, my daughter has never been married to baby daddy, her daughter was taken from our home for a weeks visit, we got custody order done in courthouse sent to him he threw them away. Judge in Dade city Florida did nothing to help. He moved in with a girlfriend and is not revealing her daughters location or allowed her to see her daughter for almost a year. My daughter is in school on deans list to be a pharmacy technician. How do we as a family help her. Please she is so heartbroken. Also she has a two year old son with her fiance and he cries for his sister. What can we do we just moved to Texas to our forever home. Please advice help 😢😢😢 is what he's doing illegal cuz it should be
What about if the father has the child at his house and he's threatening to never let you see him again
Thank you. Spot on. How about a video about domestic violence but the other party has custodial rights still until court orders and court isn't listening to the claims to care for custody decisions. It's been over a year and it seems it's not getting resolved, just continued.
Going thru this right now. I was a stay at home dad and full time caregiver. After my narcissistic wife shoved me down and then tried to push me down some stairs as I was trying to flee the home from her, I told her I was filing for divorce. She went straight to the court and filed a restraining order against me, making all kinds of false allegations. I was given 15 minutes to get out of the house or face arrest. It is now over 4 months later, and thru a perfect storm of events beyond my control, I still have not been given an opportunity to present my defense. She has not presented a single witness or even the tiniest shred of evidence to support her lies. Just this morning, yet another hearing was cancelled and rescheduled, this time not until late March. That will be more than 6 months from the time I was initially served.
I have multiple witnesses who were in the home and can testify as to what really happened, but witnesses are of no use when you can’t even get a day in court to present your case.
It’s crazy because I’m 22 and fighting to find my child I haven’t seen since 5 months because my baby father I’ve been with since 15 and him 21 . Took off with her after I threatened to expose him a million times to him and his family . They fought me , and I called the police because I was too “ crazy “ and couldn’t keep my composure because I’ve been FED up with them and them and I couldn’t STAND still sitting there listening to them lie to the police . There was no court order or nothing . He just left to CA while I’m stuck in GA and he ignores me and blocks me makes me wanna die at times
Find a good attorney.
Keep fighting for the sake of your daughter. Was there an amber alert?
In the same situation
Hey great video
My daughter is going through this in court and both her rx and his mother are narcissistic, his mother has gained custody of my granddaughter. She has gotten the judge to believe everything she says. I don't know how it happened but the investigator came up with a scathing report, agreed with all the lies the grandmother said about my daughter and none of it is true so the judge will not listen to my daughter and allows the grandmother to talk over her. Its disgusting. The judge was supposed to get another investigation done and refused to order it, that was a year ago. My granddaughter wants to come home but is scared to death to go against her grandmother who has custody. Even getting a new court date is proving impossible. My daughter has proof of all the lies she's telling and how shes continually blocking visitation in so many ways yet she can't go to court to show the judge. How do you even fight all of this? People who've been helping hear about what's going on are stumped, they all say well that can't happen then it does. She served my daughter legal paperwork and it had the wrong date and time for when the custody was being determined, she signed on for the zoom meeting and was told she missed it and why the grandmother was able to get custody. Its apparently easy to add false papers in with the real ones, no one was interested in checking and since she lost custody she was told it's too late because the judge made his decision. If she tried getting her daughter back that way, it would cost over $20,000 (just to start the process) for a lawyer. Its gone downhill since and my daughter never did anything wrong or has ever been in trouble.
The narcissist only cares about themselves.
Adonda adonda I put in the Honda make it go poof like it's Cosmo and Wanda
I am actually in the same situation what you are saying.
I'm praying for you because it's not easy😢
As a former attorney, clients never listen no matter how many times you tell them not to react. It's the children that suffer. I always put the child first in my advice and I realized most people don't love their children above their needs to get back at their ex. People say they love their kids more than anything in the world but ask them to behave in the child's best interests, and they just can't act above their own emotions. It's the same all over the world in the court system. People need to understand the court doesn't actually care - they're not there to hear your dirty laundry - as long as the child is not in danger, they don't really care what happens to your family - it's not the place to prove how virtuous you are and sling mud on your former spouse. Listen to your attorney because they actually do care and are trying to protect you (from the other party but also from yourself). I'm currently overseeing a bitter child care matter where the mother is the narcissistic parent and I feel so sorry for the child and the father. Don't allege parental alienation just because your child has made their preference for the other parent - it's a technical assessment done by a forensic psychologist who will provide a report to the court, not just an accusation you throw around. Make sure you don't cause your children to resent you. Listen and take advice from psychologists and your attorney. Don't play dirty when it comes to children because it will come back to bite you when they're older.
It is really strange how even you attorneys tell people not to record with their phones. is that because the real truth would come out and be exposed while you guys make excuses about the judge claiming that oh that might not be the full video or what did you do before that. Sorry.But if you record mom telling you that you can take your son to the mall while she takes your daughter to the dance at school and then fifteen minutes later she text messages you and says since you decided to take my son without asking I called the police and reported you for kidnapping. Guess what? I was recording when I asked her if I can take my son. But even with solid evidence like that I bet you the court your attorney and every other attorney will say that I can't use it. There's only one reason for that.Because you guys are making a fucking killing on this. The longer an attorney can drag out a case for the person he's representing the more money he makes. You are all in cahoots. The judge child custody DA and even your own attorney. Your pockets are getting fat. Prove me wrong and volunteer to help 1 person who doesn't have money for an attorney. Does anybody know of any attorney that's representing parents that actually has done this? Nope and you never will. They don't give a shit about your kids. I'll tell you right now.Removing a loving parent from the life of a child is never in the best interest of that child.I don't care what anybody says.
Hey I need your contact information pls
We both the narcissist
reversed here.. i struggle she knows how to get to me
😢
My N ex wants me to have zero custody. She is alienating me from our daughter. Unbelievable.
What can I do when she works within the courthouse
Find a good attorney
What if the child is 15 and has been completely turned against me (mom) sisters and even her brothers from her dad they saw through him but she seems to be so brainwashed and we had 5050 and I was the primary custodial parent and he never paid any child support and didn't see her for 6 years😢 now he's a saint
What I meant was if I'm the one with custody and he takes him and threatens not to give him back to me
Great video. Educative.
Hey, I'm a youtuber focusing on narcissistic relationships. Please lets connect
Will they be willing to give up there child to save the guy there with career
You gotta be fucking kidding me. You're saying that dad's are the ones that are usually starting shit and trying to take custody away from the mom? I have not read the The comments yet but i'm pretty sure they're going to prove you wrong on that one.
🎉🙏🏼
My daughters father hit me pretty bad with my 8 month old daughter in his hands and for the first time I called the police in all the times he hit me. When he got out of jail he completely left me and doesn’t want to make our family work even after I dropped the charges, and because I betrayed his trust by calling the police. So now after physically and emotionally hurting me he expects me to drop my daughter off to him when he feels like it. I’m having a hard time doing it as there is no court order in place and he can keep her since police won’t get involved. can I get in trouble for just ignoring him and his requests to see her? It’s very toxic and she’s just a little baby he’s using this to hurt me purposely. He just blames me for ruining our family I just don’t want to deal with him 😩😭 I really feel like he’s using my daughter to hit my heart. Can I just ignore him until he goes to court to get custody? Am I wrong for thinking this does this make me the narcissist ??
The fact that you are asking if you are the narcissist answers your question that you are not.
So many excuses are made for women.. When we are all human smh 👑
Or believe her female nark also exist
How do you deal with a lying therpist hire by my ex and her atty. I mean just complete lies.
Therapists who specialize in p.a. unfortunately have their livelihood jeprodized by testifying in court. It's such a double bind for all of us trying to protect our children in this situation. 😢
In family court lying is perfectly acceptable, I was served with a sons with a false sworn statement of false testimony and when I arrived in court I was told not to worry about that as she had a new false aligation for me to defend myself against. Her testimony that day consisted in her explaining her emotional abuse of our son then I was told I could no longer see my children until I worked on my parenting skills. I'm sure when my son asked her why I didn't show up for our next visit she told him the truth. Right? Her name is Christie Sanford from Napa California.
If a woman on a date says nothing’s more important then her kids, or my kids are my life. Check please, split the bill, By
How is saying her kids is her everything a red flag?
Because you childish men think she should be your mommy and her life should revolve around you. 🤮
Because. She isnt interested in shared parenting, you will never be equal, you will last on the list of her priorities. Shes probaby looking for income.
If she says i want a partner inall ways and i will value you as an equal she might just be a keeper.
@@deathlt9623 The fact that she is spending so much time talking about it on the very first day shows that she is not ready to be in a relationship. Its nothing wrong to give them most priority. The problem is, those same people are not good with balancing life. And thats the issue.
Yup check please, I'm out!! Why would I stay to be second in her life ? When she wants me to make her first?
Get to the point. Keep repiting same samw