TELLING BONUS JOKES | Jimmy Carr: Telling Jokes

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  • čas přidán 30. 07. 2020
  • Here are some of the bonus jokes from TELLING JOKES. Subjects include US Presidents, Ann Frank and Origami Dinosaurs.
    Taken From Jimmy Carr’s Telling Jokes
    Jimmy Carr marks 10 successful years in comedy with the release of his most controversial DVD to date, Telling Jokes. Featuring over 90 minutes of material that’s just too rude for television, the new DVD sees Jimmy Carr at his best; unleashing his delightfully crafted one-liners upon the nation and putting down brave hecklers.
    The Official Channel for the biggest face in British comedy (literally the biggest face - it's like the moon.)
    For the latest tour dates and tickets: www.jimmycarr.com/live/
    #JimmyCarr #Bonus #StandUpComedy #Comedy #Jokes
  • Komedie

Komentáře • 167

  • @SirDamatoIII
    @SirDamatoIII Před 3 lety +273

    That guy losing his seat is pure comedy gold.

    • @invictus3075
      @invictus3075 Před 3 lety +26

      That guy was not happy 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @phildann9225
      @phildann9225 Před 3 lety +9

      @@invictus3075 not sure he really knew what he was letting himself in for lol

    • @simonrodgers8902
      @simonrodgers8902 Před 3 lety +9

      It's a bit strong after paying for a ticket.

    • @timber72
      @timber72 Před 3 lety +7

      That guy looked like he was about to start a fight.

    • @utubetrutharrowmichael-and9105
      @utubetrutharrowmichael-and9105 Před 3 lety +1

      Yes I assume Mr Carr was escorted to his CAR lol

  • @darraghcorr2520
    @darraghcorr2520 Před 3 lety +127

    Jimmy really gave that guy that went to the bathroom the 'ump. He was not happy at all. Hilarious for everyone else though. Especially that "Was that a very long word?" remark.

  • @aryansarin485
    @aryansarin485 Před 3 lety +417

    I'm willing to bet the guy who went to the washroom was waiting for Jimmy outside when the show ended

    • @C3rdito
      @C3rdito Před 3 lety +20

      Then i guess he's still waiting... highly doubtful that Jimmy just casually walks outside the front door to take a walk home after a gig :)

    • @simonrodgers8902
      @simonrodgers8902 Před 3 lety +49

      You can tell he's not happy.

    • @matthewbailey7421
      @matthewbailey7421 Před 3 lety +22

      I think he was actually trying to push him out the chair, he didn't look happy at all.

    • @simonrodgers8902
      @simonrodgers8902 Před 3 lety +3

      @@matthewbailey7421 Why did Jimmy do that with the chairs anyway? A bit involved and pointless really.

    • @sarge019l4
      @sarge019l4 Před 3 lety +16

      @@simonrodgers8902 because they were filming it and a gap in the front row wouldn't look great.

  • @xkaylan1
    @xkaylan1 Před 3 lety +31

    Give this man a 3rd Netflix special!

  • @thegruffalo5383
    @thegruffalo5383 Před 3 lety +87

    That poor guy, he got so embarrassed

    • @ChattyCinnamon
      @ChattyCinnamon Před 3 lety +5

      Yeah I was thinking that, I felt bad for him, I think he actually handled it pretty well, that was quite cruel of jimmy, no remorse there lol

    • @iagree3742
      @iagree3742 Před 3 lety +4

      @@ChattyCinnamon well he gotta stay in character.

  • @troywalt4834
    @troywalt4834 Před 3 lety +58

    She's in the attic 😂

  • @feralferret
    @feralferret Před 3 lety +130

    I feel sorry for the woman sitting behind the man that looks like a microphone.

  • @AleksandarIvanov69
    @AleksandarIvanov69 Před 3 lety +54

    That bloke got rekt :D

  • @lukebalderstone3850
    @lukebalderstone3850 Před 3 lety +122

    love this stuff

  • @100ksubssoicanbragtomyfrie4

    0:44 Might be Toby's mum...

  • @dexedrine7939
    @dexedrine7939 Před 3 lety +3

    This has lightened up my day !

  • @welshwarrior5263
    @welshwarrior5263 Před 3 lety +14

    Great adverts. If you look closely you can see Jimmy doing amazing comedy.

  • @ThomasLeonard454
    @ThomasLeonard454 Před 3 lety +2

    Dude you have some funny sets.
    Just right amount of profanity to go along with the levity of life.

  • @TreasureHuntingNana
    @TreasureHuntingNana Před 3 lety

    I just love Jimmy :)

  • @marcelloberry6829
    @marcelloberry6829 Před 3 lety +2

    The sign of a great comedian

  • @friendofbeaver6636
    @friendofbeaver6636 Před 3 lety +1

    Origami Dinosaur sounds like a band I would like.

  • @djscottymashups
    @djscottymashups Před 3 lety +3

    Hilarious!!!! ❤😆👏

  • @superstormday993
    @superstormday993 Před 2 lety +3

    Never enough of Jimmy Carr...

  • @Hoople57
    @Hoople57 Před 3 lety +6

    I heard that Pia Zadora bit must be 30 years ago. But I couldn't remember where I heard it and never heard anyone do it. Until now. It got a nice laugh. Bravo.

    • @andreakoroknai1071
      @andreakoroknai1071 Před 2 lety

      it was on the Golden Girls, Dorothy says it about another (in-universe) actress

  • @montel4eva
    @montel4eva Před 3 lety +3

    Origami Dinosaur is a nice name for a band

  • @dookiemane
    @dookiemane Před 3 lety +1

    called that man mongo. im dead

  • @WilliamHBaird-eq2hp
    @WilliamHBaird-eq2hp Před 3 lety +2

    That guy got Schooled! What a drip!

  • @revengefrommars
    @revengefrommars Před 3 lety +9

    Hey, new jokes. Thanks.

    • @TASMAN-1
      @TASMAN-1 Před 3 lety +2

      Were you born last week ?

    • @lewiskelly14
      @lewiskelly14 Před 3 lety

      This almost doesn't sound sarcastic

  • @MegaFat1
    @MegaFat1 Před 3 lety +18

    7:08 "She's shown women everywhere that there are limits".
    Oof.

    • @forcedtohaveahandle
      @forcedtohaveahandle Před 3 lety +2

      Back in ya box

    • @MegaFat1
      @MegaFat1 Před 3 lety +1

      @@forcedtohaveahandle It was just a comment of hindsight, not a political opinion. Calm down.

  • @treknology1068
    @treknology1068 Před 3 lety +5

    That"mage' might have looked spectacular after a Magazzle

  • @iamgreezy9327
    @iamgreezy9327 Před 3 lety

    2:06 lol

  • @matthewpurcell2653
    @matthewpurcell2653 Před 3 lety

    Excellent comedian

  • @xdanonymoususer7802
    @xdanonymoususer7802 Před 3 lety +1

    This is the beesstt

    • @Tapio86
      @Tapio86 Před 3 lety

      4.5 " outie becomes 4 " innie = 8.5 inch difference. Your welcome!

  • @kingjawbo1110
    @kingjawbo1110 Před 3 lety +1

    I'm dead💀

  • @ethanh6370
    @ethanh6370 Před 3 lety +3

    That bit about the "man" who had a baby would never fly today. Although Jimmy might just be uncancellable.

    • @paulgianni
      @paulgianni Před 3 lety +1

      The man that gave birth had a man-gina.

  • @JoesDragons
    @JoesDragons Před 3 lety

    "I've put weight on" 😅

  • @iamanevutable981
    @iamanevutable981 Před 3 lety +1

    6:58 and 7:40 are the best points

  • @sbk1398
    @sbk1398 Před 3 lety +2

    When are we going to get the full Telling Jokes Special? Or Where can I purchase it?

  • @user-tj6tr4qx3p
    @user-tj6tr4qx3p Před 3 lety +2

    That guy who returned to the bathroom didn't feel comfortable at all

  • @TeeteringTod
    @TeeteringTod Před 3 lety +3

    I call bullpocky on that 8.5"

  • @KnugenMooMoo
    @KnugenMooMoo Před 3 lety +6

    Mungo my new favourite word

    • @asa-ks1vf
      @asa-ks1vf Před 3 lety +2

      Mungo

    • @E2O10
      @E2O10 Před 3 lety +4

      Mongo* i believe. From "mongoloid"

    • @KnugenMooMoo
      @KnugenMooMoo Před 3 lety

      @@E2O10 i tho it mite been mongo but fingers told me other things

    • @stewcountrysongsstew4980
      @stewcountrysongsstew4980 Před 3 lety

      Wasn't it mongo like the big brute from the blazing saddles film?

  • @jameshughes3556
    @jameshughes3556 Před 2 lety

    The thing I want most is to hear an origami dinosaur track

  • @sciencehistoryandentertain734

    Origami dinosaur really got good publicity

  • @Robinallenyukon
    @Robinallenyukon Před rokem

    looked up origami dinosaurs .... good idea for an opening act

  • @yashisaleo6997
    @yashisaleo6997 Před 3 lety

    When are you coming to South Africa 🌍

  • @nospam4488
    @nospam4488 Před 3 lety +3

    Why was this reuploaded? Have seen this e few days ago

  • @specialkettle7511
    @specialkettle7511 Před 3 lety +30

    Me: I'm scared of the backstreet boys.
    Therapist: tell me why?
    Me: ajdjdjdjdusjsjenrrjfirididkxjcjcjffjdj!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Runs out of rehabilitation*

  • @DMCM1
    @DMCM1 Před 3 lety +3

    🤣

  • @ziadrachid7655
    @ziadrachid7655 Před 3 lety

    A munt 😅

  • @edt8535
    @edt8535 Před 3 lety

    Gawd this dude is funny...

  • @dodekaedius
    @dodekaedius Před 3 lety

    Oh I fucking love your job

  • @MurderBong
    @MurderBong Před 3 lety +1

    Munt. 😅

  • @Rage-of-War
    @Rage-of-War Před 3 lety +1

    Funniest man on the planet.....

  • @owensanfordstuff
    @owensanfordstuff Před 3 lety +4

    Guy went to a comedy gig, say in the front row and went to the toilet, what did he expect😂

  • @PhrostyGaming
    @PhrostyGaming Před 3 lety +3

    I wonder if origami dinosaur is still together

  • @Hudson316
    @Hudson316 Před 3 lety +2

    This exact video but 10 seconds longer got posted like 6 weeks ago

    • @dubious6718
      @dubious6718 Před 3 lety +1

      So its not the exact video then..

  • @oneshotme
    @oneshotme Před 3 lety

    Seen all of them to many times already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • @user-co7sb9qo3l
    @user-co7sb9qo3l Před 3 lety

    8:30 vaguyna

  • @Tularis
    @Tularis Před 3 lety +4

    7:58 never a truer word has been spoken!

  • @BobbyIronsights
    @BobbyIronsights Před 3 lety +2

    Anybody else google origami dinosaur band?

  • @zolf3141
    @zolf3141 Před 3 lety +6

    Got enough ad interruptions?

    • @lunsmann
      @lunsmann Před 3 lety

      There were ads?

    • @kajenbop
      @kajenbop Před 3 lety

      Don’t have to watch it mate

  • @mike14991498
    @mike14991498 Před 3 lety +3

    Suicide bombers - what makes them tick?

  • @Leftyotism
    @Leftyotism Před 3 lety

    7:39 THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I TELL PEOPLE XDXDXD ♥ ♥ ♥

  • @chetanmcgrath8408
    @chetanmcgrath8408 Před 3 lety +2

    hi.

  • @ryanrobertson2462
    @ryanrobertson2462 Před 3 lety

    Lol

  • @johnathanroe6245
    @johnathanroe6245 Před 3 lety

    Mary killed a little lamb.

  • @isabellabain6666
    @isabellabain6666 Před 3 lety

    Hi

  • @TASMAN-1
    @TASMAN-1 Před 3 lety

    "Bonus repeats".

  • @bitzibaerlie
    @bitzibaerlie Před 3 lety +1

    Anyone who has found Origami Dinosaur?

    • @bitzibaerlie
      @bitzibaerlie Před 3 lety +1

      @@yesthat3302 Thanks! They are not half bad.

    • @johnnythefoxify1
      @johnnythefoxify1 Před 3 lety +2

      You mean they're totally bad?

    • @grumpyoldman3458
      @grumpyoldman3458 Před 3 lety

      They're pretty good if you like that kind of thing (which I do BTW).

  • @mofhiryjones8272
    @mofhiryjones8272 Před 3 lety +6

    Frustrating in a 10min video I gotta stop for an ad nearly every minute. I swear I've seen less commercial ratio in cable!

    • @lewiskelly14
      @lewiskelly14 Před 3 lety

      They deliberately make videos last 10 or more minutes because they get more ads out of it

    • @gurimisenpai2358
      @gurimisenpai2358 Před 3 lety +1

      You know you could just skip the end and repeat it if it's that much of a bother.

    • @iainmillar1532
      @iainmillar1532 Před 3 lety +2

      Depends where you are i think. I'm in the uk, i got a 5sec ad at the start and that was all. I don't watch CZcams in the usa because of all the ads.

    • @dubious6718
      @dubious6718 Před 3 lety

      I have never watched an ad on CZcams

    • @kajenbop
      @kajenbop Před 3 lety

      Why don’t you watch it somewhere else for free with no adverts?

  • @hartzellos
    @hartzellos Před 3 lety +3

    Repost :/

  • @yannah159
    @yannah159 Před 2 lety

    Jimmy would you do jokes about all generations, baby boomers to gen z

  • @tegijamees
    @tegijamees Před 3 lety +1

    first

  • @qutube100
    @qutube100 Před 3 lety

    Adds ruined it again wtf youtube!

  • @paulgianni
    @paulgianni Před 3 lety +1

    The man that gave birth had a man-gina.

  • @benpatterson241
    @benpatterson241 Před 3 lety

    Bums

  • @josephgeorge1612
    @josephgeorge1612 Před 3 lety

    hi

  • @redbrick1400
    @redbrick1400 Před 3 lety +23

    Anybody feel sorry for the dude who went to the toilet and got back to everybody hanging up on him

  • @rickshawthe3nd112
    @rickshawthe3nd112 Před 3 lety

    Bruv

  • @vishwajeetnandyaduraj4804

    We Indians learnt English from British and yet American accent sound easier to understand. Am I dumb or what??

    • @one2sree
      @one2sree Před 3 lety

      Indians didn't actually learn accent from british but rather the vocabulary. You find easier to understand american accent because most media that you consume is american. British humour is quick, witty & dirty so you need good grasp of language & dark humor to understand

    • @vishwajeetnandyaduraj4804
      @vishwajeetnandyaduraj4804 Před 3 lety

      @@one2sree Kuch bhi matlab??

  • @jimmyyaeger8494
    @jimmyyaeger8494 Před 3 lety

    *test*

  • @einousmi
    @einousmi Před 3 lety +3

    Toinen

  • @DoISmeLLikeWeed
    @DoISmeLLikeWeed Před 3 lety

    Hi Jimmy or his hired guns reading, positive warm comments from USA. I do love your stuff and the Countdown as well. I have laughed until I hurt! BUT C'mon Jimmy! Did you not lift the Anne Frank joke from Bea Arthur......who did it BEST!!!! Thank you for all the laughs! If anyone deserves a tax shelter its you and Roger Moore.....Bye.

  • @creepycassette
    @creepycassette Před rokem

    Dude dont sit right up front and get up to leave like bro ur done

  • @elizathegamer413
    @elizathegamer413 Před 3 lety +2

    Lmao idk how at 8:40 ish the transphobia is so strong but I can't help but laugh lol

  • @chubbygroundhogbushcraft

    Any Americans here?

  • @rubenashleywesterhoff2664

    he had no vagh

  • @Shaun.Stephens
    @Shaun.Stephens Před 3 lety

    I've seen all of this on youtube in other videos on this channel. I mean, are you catering for goldfish or something?

  • @zacmills8752
    @zacmills8752 Před rokem

    I just realised im 7 1/2 inches less of a man

  • @jimandrews4261
    @jimandrews4261 Před 3 lety +6

    Transgenders disliked this video

  • @kiningroseburg9288
    @kiningroseburg9288 Před 3 lety +1

    Why do you only upload very old comedy sketches?? not worth watching new videos anymore, cause I know all the jokes

    • @JanKGames
      @JanKGames Před 3 lety +2

      It's a pandemic. There is no live shows ontop of how most of his shows aren't recorded. If you want Jimmy, EOOTCDCD is your best bet

  • @ManiacAbuse
    @ManiacAbuse Před 2 lety

    The dude had to go to the toilet and he reseated him and made fun. That bit was kinda lame

  • @aarbear83fierce
    @aarbear83fierce Před rokem

    Ooo no… the transphobia…. Not cute.

    • @amazinandwatumeanbythat1514
      @amazinandwatumeanbythat1514 Před rokem

      🤦🏼‍♂️ you're brainwashed little girl, go be offended somewhere else

    • @aarbear83fierce
      @aarbear83fierce Před rokem

      @@amazinandwatumeanbythat1514 I am actually kinda impressed you called me a girl… soooo thank you for sharing your opinion…… …. I am impressed you didn’t try to miss gender me. So thank you…

  • @mikehopkins4040
    @mikehopkins4040 Před 3 lety

    He is about as funny as
    running a marathon with a stone in your shoe.
    Painful.

  • @ryanrobertson2462
    @ryanrobertson2462 Před 3 lety

    Lol