If I Die Tomorrow

🔰This is a sad poem that is trying to make you feel better.
I've been working on this poem for quite some time because I was searching for the correct story to carry this feeling of "endings and beginnings". The final story that seemed appropriate was this of 2 people that can communicate without language and can understand each other on a deeper level. I hope you enjoy the softness of the final result and the intricacies of human nature that I humbly tried to capture and present.
P.S. This wouldn't be possible without my friend and the stray cats that she pets.
🔰Support me on Patreon: / illneas
🔰Find me here 🔗 / _illneas
🔗 / illneas
🔗 / illneas
🔗open.spotify.c...
Second channel
🔗 / @akidwithacameraorjust...
🔰Communities
- / discord
- / 2314655172176122
- / searchingformeaning
🔰References
-The narrator is Melissa Varela
/ melissa_melicious
/ @melissa_melicious
-The music is this:
LO.OSE - Fragile Feeling
open.spotify.c...
🔰My equipment:
I film handheld with a Panasonic Lumix
G80
amzn.to/2uGqmQZ
GX80
amzn.to/33e5Tye
📷Olympus M.Zuiko Digital 45mm F1.8 Lens
amzn.to/2vr9P3N
🔰If I Die Tomorrow by illneas
If this was my last day with you
I would silently observe the reflection of this room in your eyes
Hoping to feel present for the first time
If this was my last day here
I would break the glass resting on my skin
That invisibly separates me from this world
And from you
If this was my last day with you
I wouldn't tell you
I would talk to you about my half-finished poems
As if I had the courage to write again
Hoping someday you will finish them
While you might be searching for me
Between the lines
Or trying to forget me
If you notice my voice shaking
While talking to you
Try to ignore it
If you notice my eyes getting blurry
Find comfort in your sudden disappearance
And wait for gravity to reveal you again
If I die tomorrow
I would finally realize that the ambient pain
Is another proof that I'm still alive
You know
I know
The fragility of everything
The fragility of me
I know
You know
That as the sunset approaches
Every time you smile
I die a little bit
I'm sorry
I haven't touched you enough
You see, I can only say "I love you"
In silence
You might be angry with me
For hiding it from you
But all I wanted
was another normal day with you
If I don't die tomorrow
I will live as if I could

[@ikpergerard7558]

"Knowing" that life is ephemeral is profound and has an insightfulness of how we treat people we come in contact with and we acknowledge every relationship as a fleeting privilege and make the best of the "now"

[@illneas]

You did not just use the word "ephemeral"!!! It has Greek roots and I use it constantly because I believe in it's meaning. Thank you for watching this and for your input.

[@ikpergerard7558]

@@illneas I like what you do so much that most times, I just sit still and listen to the poems, repeatedly. Wish you the strength to carry on doing this good work you do

[@one_man_studio]

czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@dougsam6341]

What type music is this?

[@Hello-le1lf]

@@dougsam6341it’s a poem, and it expresses the meaning of life

[@kaosaechao4049]

“I would talk to you about my half-finished poems as if I had the courage to write again, hoping some days you will finish them.” These are beautiful lines. Legacy shall be carry on by someone else.

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@criminalchicken499]

​@@farrah9748what?

[@orgestmalaj2244]

"And even if this was my last day with you, I wouldn't tell you .."
"I am sorry for hiding it, but all I wanted was just another normal day with you .."
"And even if I don't die tomorrow I will live as If I could .. " 🌒

[@nathasha6763]

This title reminds me of "If tomorrow starts without me" by David Romano✍️

[@user-rm4uw1uc7p]

I was thinking of that too lol

[@Crymeaseaaa]

Sameee

[@fatmazohraben6799]

Same

[@ichinikochiniseokjinie7361]

That was such a beautiful poem.

[@the-hitchhicker]

Same here ;)

[@conflicted_mind7]

Made me teary-eyed. Illneas,man you're one of the finest of artists I've ever seen.

[@illneas]

I'm blushing, thank you for this

[@firenzexstr2667]

@@illneas can you please do Roll the dice by Charles Bukowski? Thanks for these great works

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@humalien6957]

I agree i hope he knows how many souls he saves everyday

[@sofiaperaza885]

Dear kid with a camera,
I wanted to tell you I, also, have an own poem also titled "If I die tomorrow" and the feelings portrayed by two poems called the same (yours and mine) are so entirely different and I find that amazing. How using the same words one can portray such contrasting ideas. You never cease to amaze me.
A stranger on the internet.

[@illneas]

You can share your poem on my discord

[@hellinas77]

La

[@congruentcrib]

“I just wanted another normal day with you”
This hurts. So many people take their lives and it comes out of nowhere.
Always heartbreaking when it happens

[@its_leyl.a]

If I don't die tomorrow, I will live as if I could.
WhAt!!!!! Wow. There are so many good lines here. Also, can't believe I am saying this, but this video might have one of your best visuals ever. Thank you, yet again, for making some thing that's inspiring me to write.

[@illneas]

Thanks Leyla, it was shot during the sunset in a really cool location, glad you liked it.

[@DemetriPanici]

*“He who fears death will never do anything worth of a man who is alive.” - Seneca*

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@gaganamanjunath732]

20 seconds in and I already know this would tear my heart apart beautifully

[@khushijakhar6264]

DUDE, I TOTALLY ADORE YOUR CONTENT. THE WORDS HAVE DEPTH AND THEY HELP ME SEE LIFE FROM A DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE. VERY OFTEN WE ARE CAUGHT WITH IN OUR HEADS WITH OUR OWN TRIVIAL ISSUES, BUT THE WORLD IS SO BIG AND BEAUTIFUL. YOUR CONTENT IS BEAUTIFUL AND I LOVE YOUR CLIPS AND HOW YOU TURN THEM INTO A MASTERPIECE. I WUD REALLY LIKE TO DOTHAT IN FUTUTRE. I LOVE THE IDEA OF EXPRESSING ONE'S EMOTION THROUGH HEART TOUCHING WORDS. AND NO WONDER, I CAN SEE WHEN VISUALS ARE ADDED IT MAKES IT MORE APPEALING AND EASY TO RELATE. YOUR WORK IS VERY INSPIRING.....

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@soumyadeep1412]

Once again man loved every bit of these 3 and half minutes. Learning a lot from you... haven't been able to watch past 3-4 videos...gonna binge them all.❤️

[@illneas]

Thank you for giving me an opportunity, I really appreciate it

[@allinaflutter6117]

How do you manage to capture how a person can feel, express it so beautifully, yet never have met them before? This is just so beautiful, the words, the cinematography. Speechless 🌸

[@illneas]

Τhank you for sharing this

[@nsingh9286]

Goosebumps every single time, you are amazing artist Illneas.

[@illneas]

❤️❤️❤️

[@madison_drew]

That part ‘I wouldn’t tell you’ looked exactly like my cat Autumn and when she died that was ……like losing a daughter my goodness much love this is very well done.

[@DemetriPanici]

*"Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present." - Marcus Aurelius*

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@bhadraviswanath5184]

"If I don't die tomorrow, I will live as I could."
This, this single line hit so hard.
Hats off illneas. You are truly an artist.
As you wrote, it is a sad poem trying to make us feel better. It surely did.
And a big round of applause to all the patrons who made the editing
You all did such a great work👏👏👏👏

[@Saturns48]

You see I can only say I love...in silence- Just one of my favorites. Your ability to craft words, and embed emotion into them is truly beautiful. You touch on so many unspoken or hard to conceive feelings and thoughts, and even harder to express...you words express what I cannot and bc of that I can breath a sigh a relief that I'm not the only one❤

[@illneas]

Thank you once again for experiencing my work ^^

[@Soulie_alze]

I am literally the biggest fan of yours like the way you shoot everything is just AMAZING!!!! And the poems are so great I watch your every live!! And I aslo like to write poems and speeches...(I had also wrote and comment my poem but you never see it I am not telling in a rude way )and you disevere so many subscribers,pls never leave CZcams!!! BORAHAE 💜
Edit:( thankyou so much illness and people who liked and comment)

[@Soulie_alze]

@@crealibro what is her channel name??

[@A.G.Birajdar]

Your comment is too so emotional
Whenever someone says never leave I felt it.
May your love keep him here for forever.

[@Soulie_alze]

@@A.G.Birajdar thanks ☺️

[@deepanshisubba4619]

I would love to know that channel name.

[@Soulie_alze]

can I share my poem 👉🏻👈🏻?

[@Thilde1]

This poem reminded me of the poem “the morning after I killed myself”, that you made a vid about too. I appreciate your work, it is truly a beautiful art form.

[@illneas]

Meggie Royer is always an inspiration^^ thank you for watching my video.

[@alifewithpoetry]

Wow, I had to watch this again and again. Your videography is outstanding, one of your best yet. It manages to compliment the poem beautifully, in a surreal story way, with the sunset kissing each scene. Hugging every line. The artistic effects come into full circle, around the deepness of the poem. I like how you blurred the scene after “if you notice my eyes getting blurry” - The sunset shots are truly incredible. Brilliant creation. 🙏✨I love it 🥺 This was well worth the wait 💫

[@illneas]

Damn you noticed so many things, that little blur was a mistake I didn't correct, it came out perfectly

[@alifewithpoetry]

@@illneas ha! It did come out perfectly, I love how it added more emotion to the line. Interesting how little details, at times, minor errors, make projects even more beautiful. It’s a reminder that beauty can truly come out of mistakes. (I have a poem that I made a mistake on as well and same kind of thing happened, I left it because it added to the artistic side of that specific line in the poem - nobody noticed though lol!!!) Hope you have a great day!

[@devrim-oguz]

I'm so excited. I feel like you speak my feelings for me.

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@prachiyadav1332]

I've been a fan of your work ever since you uploaded 'If' by Rudyard Kipling. I remember it because this was the first time I ever felt deeply drawn towards poetry and your video visuals are a cherry on top of the amazing poems that you bring to life. Much love and support to you. Keep up the good work and never ever stop writing poems because they are just wonderful !

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@stevenlomon]

You make some of the most meaningful and profound videos on the entire Internet. I just wanna give you a hug and say that these videos expand my worldview and change my life for the better ❤

[@illneas]

If you ever meet me, pls hug

[@someoneinthecrowd3162]

This is just so meaningfully beautiful. It hits different at this point where I discover I fell in love with her, while I am hoping my life to end soon.

[@alifewithpoetry]

Looking forward to this 😍

[@Denchanted]

Made me quite sad. Beauitful, longing, and tragic to feel this way, The part about her poetry truly hitting my soul SPOT ON!!

[@SIX06_]

I love seeing your channel growing so much!! 🥰🥰 So many people here now

[@illneas]

Awww thank you so much

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@Lucid_Poetess]

Its beautiful like always, but it does not make me really sad. In fact i could feel my younger self in your words and how i thought that time. Im always fascinated by your supernatural ability to combine words, film, music and of course the voice that reads your poem. I still have the feeling to be not before the screen, it feels like being inside the colours, the smell of the sea, the meows of the cats ..... sosososo, i stop writing a story now :-)

[@illneas]

Pls write a story, thank you for your kind words

[@DozyDruid]

As always..thanks for sharing

[@priyankasharma5974]

Every time you smile...I die a little bit.❣ loved it !!.

[@mariamiller9942]

Another amazing project. Your keen sense of emotional observation is inspiring. Your images were the perfect envelope to store your words. Once again, we'll worth the wait. Thank you❤

[@lst_sul2118]

Everything is flawless ❤️.
Visuals , voice ,poem everything..touches my heart to witness it 🕊️☮️

[@frances2184]

Been watching your videos for a couple months. Every line touches my heart. Hats off, Illneas! 👏🏻

[@illneas]

Thank you so so much

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@a.l_caneli]

You truly have a way with words, Illneas. This is such a beautiful and bittersweet poem. I truly need to catch up on the last videos you posted; once again, beautiful work 🌻✨

[@illneas]

Helloooo again, thank you for sticking around for such a long time

[@lopsidedlollipop]

This is beautiful. Your poems always somehow capture what I'm feeling when I listen to them.

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@bhaskarnath1374]

I just love your poems❤️ all of them ! And this is one of my favourite CZcams channels:)

[@puparia8420]

Every now and then i come back to this channel to find out there’s more relatable feelings and thoughts i’ve been feeling strange about and to give a way of comfort that it is okay to have them and keep going! Thank you

[@artisan1800]

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. . . 😢😢😢 and I'm not neccesarily talking about just the poem. The women is truly eloquent . . .

[@psychedelicalina8253]

Literally everything that went and still goes through my mind each time i sit alone i a room, keeping my words in a box wondering if the people i love will ever find them or try to.

[@marylinnik3115]

I believe someday someone will!💞

[@mrsprite399]

Just want to say that your channel is one of bestest thing to exist.
Keep going 👍

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@erikhiserodt6433]

Been keeping up with your stuff still and damn man this may be my new favorite video of yours. This is one of the most powerful poems I've heard. Take care and keep up the great work.

[@obstsalat8118]

this video was what I needed rn. thank you so much illneas. your poems, as well as the visuals are just unbelievable beautiful and together it's just... a foreign universe full of magic and depth. 🖤💭💫

[@illneas]

Aww thank you for saying this

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@mushroom_kid9353]

the visuals are so amazing omg so many beautiful shots and so many beautiful lines

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@Gloomy_Vieve]

This is such a beautiful poem and a great reminder to live every day to the fullest because you never know when your life will end. Thank you for another amazing poem Illneas :]

[@KasaChaineSecrete]

You have a really talent for cinematography, your clip are always so beautifull

[@juliemcneill8087]

😢 this was written...I don't have words. so haunting. the message in the last line...we should all carry that within in us and silently repeat it to ourselves in the mirror each morning...

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@parul209]

Loved it, leaves you with a transient feeling , everything is temporary, yet all that which is worth living somehow lives on ❤️

[@simonporwal5152]

You are a legend !! Your poems have my heart 🥺💞💯 The way u edit those videos the way you portray things is just fantastic 💞💯 there is no day that exists when I don't listen to your channel 💫💯 this made me realize how transient life is worth watching 💫💯

[@duaahmd3662]

Your just an amazing writer and the voice of this person is so calming in a sad way

[@A.G.Birajdar]

So emotional, so touching, so relatable
so beautiful✨
Voice of deep within me.

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@jhonabeliber6892]

This is absolutely beautiful! I'm in tears while watching this. I can say that this is one of my favorite in your videos. Really. Been a fan of your channel for a while now. ♡

[@anagoricki1407]

Every time you drop a video I can't help but smile ☺ have a great day!

[@illneas]

Have a great day as well

[@yarahilal6544]

I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have your channel. You’re my go-to channel when I need motivation and inspiration for poetry and i’m so grateful for that. Really, thank you

[@mikejox]

Thanks for all your impact in my life

[@illneas]

☺️

[@philipgermani1616]

Your last line is devastating. Thank you.

[@loveleenkaur3381]

M addicted to your work

[@ioannislentas5226]

Amazing video! I am sure Charles would love it!

[@void3824]

You never fail to amaze me. I love it. I shed a tear (‘: it’s so beautiful

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@us73421]

If I die tomorrow I would like to listen this masterpiece till my last breath 😌 The poem really touched my heart 🥺

[@illneas]

Live as if you could

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@lazarus8599]

Im having a mental breakdown right now and suddenly this popped out from youtube recommendations on my notification bar. Ive been depressed for a lot of reasons. My mental illness has taken its toll on me. Ive been contemplating on kms. And this poem is just the right words I have in mind.
Honestly, I just wanna be saved. Because no matter how compelling the idea of death is, a part of me still wanna live. Not for myself, but for my cat.

[@StrikerCup79]

waking up to reality knowing life is merely pain,suffering sadness,anger and futility
everywhere we will go we still can’t escape reality since we are living with it
so dying is like a blessing and living is like a curse

[@mell1685]

I hope you’re doing well. I have felt the same way but there are many moments now I’m discovering the blessings in life despite all the suffering. I know you commented this 10 months ago, so I hope things have changed for the better?

[@airaai7524]

this being recommended and pop up in my notification, i have no other words :) and it's been awhile since i watch short like this, like months. and this is literally how i feel & think all this while.

[@frogchair]

I liked that line about ‘the glass resting on my skin’

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@ASMinor]

I am an avid #MentalHealthAwareness advocate and spoken word performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my CZcams channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. 💙❤

[@highschoolthoughts8950]

You should make a poetry competition, where viewers could send in there poems, for a chance to feature in a video. That would be really cool!

[@MeeraWadher]

this is such a great idea!

[@coffeestudy753]

the ambient pain
Is another proof that I'm still alive
beautiful!

[@snowlied]

I love this. Being present is, I think, the only real purpose of life. Present in anything and everything you do. Every moment you spend with others and yourself.

[@mikenicoletti3899]

Beautiful! Both the speaker and the poem. Incredible, thank you 🙏

[@insidiouslyfanatic714]

I think you are the first person who has truly defined the word aesthetic by your work. What is most beautiful about your writing is that it is excruciatingly real, it's daunting yet it is beautiful. That is what urges me to check every video that you have made, cause it will both stir my thoughts and calm me down. Your work deserves a lot more appreciation.
Bing bong you have a new subscriber ❤

[@varshahoa0107]

One place where we can hide silently is in your poetries...I don't have enough words to say what I feel.. and this,this literally made me cry...and I kept watching to shed out the tears. Thankyou for this sweet bitter pain,Illneas.
Much love🖤

[@illneas]

The same applies to me, we all need sometimes to hide somewhere or be invisible. Thank you for this

[@AloSpace]

No sé porque este video de alguna manera me da la sensación de recuperar la esperanza y que me faltan hacer muchas cosas más

[@pheelmacababe2861]

"If i die tomorrow, i would finally realize that the ambient pain is another proof that i am, still alive." i love this line, knowing even if you die, your still alive in peoples memories, no matter how sad and painful

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@oladosvinzuella6998]

no not the words , but the feeling that there is something in common between all of the sceneries you put in the video is what makes this art outstanding

[@illneas]

Thank you friend

[@david_johnston7880]

Who are those who thumbed down this piece of art? Seriously? I mean, anyway it's hard to find such talents nd on top of that there are dislikes. Just like the likers complement such talents in the comments, haters kindly educate us what did u dislike abt it. I mean what could you possibly dislike here.

[@Sassybell]

I am out of words but this gave me goosebumps. Thank you for your words. Its beautiful.♡

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@jazzy000]

I became addicted to your videos 🤩!!! I look forward to each new video! So many emotions not only in songs....in shots, movements, music! Youu conquer human hearts you conquer the world❣❣❣❣❣

[@manshanaseer9649]

I am impatiently waiting for this video❣

[@janeaustenswife4333]

I watched this a few days before I tried to take my life. It somehow makes me so angry that I'm still here and watching this again.

[@snehanazifa7931]

These poems are so beautiful

[@sakshiraj3496]

I’m touched . what an appreciable work of art !!!!😩

[@moonchild_ash]

"I wouldn't tell you"

[@swamp6825]

This really reminds me of the book “They both die at the end” I recommend it if you enjoyed this poem

[@layaguinmaryfaithc.8814]

that as the sunset approaches every time you smile, i die a little bit OMG 😭😭😭😭

[@Tes73792]

All these videos in this channel are phenomenal.

[@divinelyh]

Your videos literally mean a lot to me . Thank you .

[@illneas]

❤️❤️❤️

[@Fromtheforgottengardens]

Always try to live life you wish from tomorrow. I recently experienced it

[@TheElissaA]

Oh thank you! It brings me tears, thank you illneas

[@patsymalone3518]

Beautiful poem and video. You are my favorite modern poet. Thank you.

[@meh3083]

Thank you for expressing and mending the soul, whatever the soul really is. Art..

[@farihanishat9795]

This is so beautiful, it made me cry. Still crying.

[@illneas]

Awww hope it helped in some way

[@farihanishat9795]

@@illneas yeah, it did. Thankyou 💗

[@gauranshisingh4338]

😍😍😍😍😍😍cannt wait...

[@deborahostmo]

so impactful - I aspire to create content like that - almost like a movie

[@illneas]

Τhanks for the compliment

[@thechancellor-]

To the *incredible person* that's seeing this, I wish you all the best in life❤ don't ever blame yourself, accept things and go forward. Your smile is precious and the keys to a happy life is in your hands.

[@one_man_studio]

Here is another visual for this poem
czcams.com/video/NlYA20lN2eE/video.html

[@az.x25]

Spend time with your parents like today is your last day with them EVERYDAY! ✨

[@roryasrorri701]

gosh, your words hit harder and harder, sir. thank you for posting them.

[@deathbyme2333]

You never know what could happen tomorrow, so live everyday as if it were your last.

[@LilyGraceySa]

The fragility of me sounds like a great title to an upcoming poem!💜
Besides, I adore this one.💜
It's sooo soothing, peaceful as well as remarkably written.

[@illneas]

Post it on my discord if you write it

[@LilyGraceySa]

@@illneas OMG!! I'm so going to try hard to write something, hopefully.💜

[@oculus4521]

Why is everything on this channel so sad and depressing @illneas put a little light in that morning tea bro

[@65-ayshasiddiqua8]

After ages!!! But worth the waiting🧡