Why You Can't Stop Consuming Video Games & Anime
Vložit
- čas přidán 2. 07. 2024
- Our coaches are trained to help with this! Sign up for the waitlist here: bit.ly/3kyqOZh
▼ Timestamps ▼
────────────
00:00:00 Intro
00:00:20 Interview Start
00:03:42 Frustrated Because of Not Achieving Goals
00:13:10 the Need To Consume
00:39:27 Parent’s Divorce, Not Blaming Mom and Dad
00:49:00 Dr K’s Thoughts
01:00:40 Stuck Between Two Worlds
01:22:27 Where Do Goals Come From?
01:26:50 Not Wanting To Wake Up, Suicidality
01:38:41 Closing Thoughts and Practical Advice
01:53:18 Being a Gigachad
01:57:51 Meditation
────────────
DISCLAIMER
Healthy Gamer is an online community and resource platform for gamers and their families. It does not provided medical services or professional counseling, and it is not a substitute for professional medical care. Our coaches are peer supporters, not professionally trained experts, and they cannot provide medical service. If you or a loved on are experiencing an emergency, please call your nation's emergency telephone number.
All guests of Healthy Gamer are informed of the public, non-medical nature of the content and have expressly agreed to share their story.
Become a Healthy Gamer!
Healthy Gamer Merch Store: healthygamerstore.com/
Discord: healthygamer.ac-page.com/discord
Support us on Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/healthygamer
Interviews & Lectures: / healthygamergg
Twitch Channel: / healthygamer_gg
Podcast: open.spotify.com/show/6VaJwyS...
#videogameaddiction #psychology #mentalhealth
btw our coaching program helps with problems like video game or internet addiction: bit.ly/3kyqOZh
We're having a ton of coaching spots opening up in september
Love your videos, keep up the good work! :)
Where is the blog post link Doc?
It's actually insane how much this guy and myself have in common , even down to chat saying he has a good voice for radio I've heard that all the time lol. This was definitely an insightful watch for me.
.
Can't find a single coach, always full.
Stuck on the waitlist... Whenever a slot opens up, it notifies me at 3 am in the morning (Sydney time) by the time I wake up, spot is gone...
I would literally pay triple the price just to get access for 1on1 coach
I cannot stress enough how much better Regular viewer interviews are than Streamer ones. It's night and day. The problems are more relatable, there's more space for introspection, acknowledging genuine personal flaws and shortcomings, less of a need to maintain an image, you name it.
Been trying to get on for a loooong time, even took a break and started applying again.
fully agree!!!
I say this all of the time. 1 million percent agreed
@@bobbywhite5319 Out of curiosity, why do you want to get on? Is it because there's a specific issue you'd like Dr. K to talk about?
The maintaining image part is the big issue. I liked steamer interviews initially because it humanized them a lot but part of it also felt slightly for publicity
I really like this guy-he's probably the most well-spoken non-streamer that has been on the show. I can easily picture him being successful. He has the wit, the charisma, the sharpness, just needs direction. If I could invest in Dom stocks I would.
its because he watches this channel a lot, it makes you smart
He is a liar. And quite good at it too... But it's really unfortunate that I found out because now I don't know if even any of his story is trustworthy at all.
Live laugh Love is not from a movie...
@@TokikataMDXV what makes you say that?
@@leonardodavinci4259 same. I wanna know too
"No one wants to write a book, everyone wants to be a writer"
You'd think gigaChad Dr. K would've said "Everybody wanna be a bodybuilder, nobody wanna lift no heavy ass weight"
Well, Dr.K wrote his own book on gaming addiction, so that’s probably why that’s the comparison he went to
Ronnie Coleman
Love it. I think the best variation of the quote comes from Austin Kleon who put it this way. "Lots of people want to be the noun without doing the verb."
I mean, for me the training itself is enjoyable. The end result is much less important to me.
Yeah budddaaayyyy lightweight babyyy
*Puts girl on pause for Invincible* King
She doesn't understand the grindset
Jesus christ that part about his Dad had my eyes watering and that rarely ever happens for me. Dom seems like like he'd be cool as fuck to have as a friend tbh. I totally relate to the chad/nerd wombo combo, you can sort of isolate yourself because you almost fit into neither camp. Too 'normal' for the nerds, too gaming obsessed for the casuals 🤷♂️
Yeah man, what fucks me up in college is almost the same but i chose the other path by faking my self to hangout with the "chads". In the end i only have a handful of true friend that know me inside out for who i really am.
He is a liar exaggerating facts and changing the subject so he can tell more stories. It's obvious. But he illustrates a real problem well.
@@TokikataMDXV I'm curious, why do you feel like he's exaggerating facts and changing the subject? I don't think he'll get anything out of that.
@@TokikataMDXV why do you have a hate-boner for this guy? Grow up
@@TokikataMDXV I’d also really appreciate if you could elaborate why you think this?
Destroy the false dichotomy between Chads and Weebs. Become a Cheeb and you will find peace and strength. In all seriousness, there was so much in this that I related to. Wishing you the best, Dom. Hope you and your fam have better and happier days ahead
A cheeb... We need this to become an official term. A cheeb. I wanna be a cheeb. Cheebhood intensifies.
@@SuperAlphaKirby Let's do it bro
Dom 2: Rise of Cheeb
Let's make a Facebook group!
Im not but a few minutes in, but this guy is extremely relatable to my own issues. Wanting to be playing music, work on professional life, maintain a relationship, play games as a hobby, maintain exercise. On the outside it looks cool and fun, but it feels sometimes like a prison you’ve chained yourself to. ‘Be good at everything you do, all at once, all the time’. It causes massive analysis paralysis when free time does arise. What of my 16 hobbies will I engage in today? Or which of those 16 hobbies am I going to sit alone in my living room feeling guilty and angry at myself for not practicing? Well, my switch is here, let me play some smash with my friends…oh…
Dom is a hero and so relatable. Being torn between worlds is how I feel being torn between my goals to be a scienctist and to be a composer/musician and not being able to combine them and aim for something has left me paralysed for years. Now starting to get my life together and in doing so I'm able to resist gaming and other forms of procrastination.
Hey. What about neural networks which compose music. Sounds like science and music to me. :D
There are a billion ways to combine science with music, just look deeper into experimental music. Besides, plenty of people in the field play just for a hobby, no shame in not being able to combine disparate interests.
I go to one of the best science high schools in the US and play piano, and am nearing a crossroads where I will have to focus one or the other. I don't envy your choice.
You could scientifically explore what impact music has on human emotions and do musical therapy with compositions tailored to your patients
i relate so much except mine is Like 13yr Old Version lol hahaha
I feel like a milk drinking, Justin Beiber haircut, bass playing, track athlete with a naruto shirt would be a very memorable and interesting person to meet.
nice ODST profile pic mah dude
whats wrong with drinking milk???
@@sakuya1185 Literally nothing. Watch the whole vod for full context.
Everything. Drinking milk means supporting the dairy industry, which repeatedly rapes cows via artificial insemination to keep them constantly producing milk. They're immediately separated from their newborn calves (who are slaughtered for veal) despite their cries when taken away. Finally, after years of abuse and confinement, milk cows are ultimately sold for meat themselves at a fraction of their lifespan the moment their productivity begins to slow. It's a barbaric, indefensible system.
@@SillyLittleBiscuit or now burst that small bubble you live in, and support your local farmers and buy milk from them, your non-existant problme has been solved.
Wow. I really connected with this one. I used to be a D1 American football collegiate player and started every year as a safety. Thats how everyone knew me as, but I loved gaming and nerdy stuff like Dom. I didn't love football but I was really good at it and really enjoyed the team aspect and comradery that came with it. But when I didnt make the NFL, I felt discarded by friends/family and my overall self-worth plummet. I went from endless potential and attention to a nobody that everyone had pity for in a matter of weeks.
Even now I am trying to 'define' or 'figure out' who I am supposed to be. My whole life I had coaches telling me what to do and gameplaning for success and it usually worked with results to show. But in life, its not so clear cut.
After football I listened to the wrong people and got bad advice that has landed me in debt, terrible jobs, and feeling like I wasted many years of life. I have tried to be independent by moving away out of state, but I still feel lost with little self-control and tyrannize myself for not being more motivated or as disciplined as my old football self. Luckily I have an awesome family but I still push them away cuz they just dont understand/cant empathize what I am going through mentally, emotionally, financially and socially.
hey, I can kind of understand what you’re going through. If it helps, I took an entire year off from my “football” and just did all the things I always wanted to do like game and just not be a machine people wanted me to be. It mentally helped me more what I really wanted to do aside from game all day, because I was too stressed out from what other people expected me to do, if that makes sense. Sounds like you’re burnt out. I hope you can take time off and just be you and figure out the way you want to things out, and fck what other people think. Hang in there, buddy.
Dom from the stream: Thanks for sharing man. It's not only tough comparing yourself to what you could be, but what you USED to be. These last 2 years have been that for me in a lot of aspects. I don't have the answer, and I am still getting through it. But I'll maintain my promise to Dr. K I made at the end of the stream, and struggle on. Tomorrow may be worse than today, but I'll push through it none the less. One day at a time. Will you carry on with me?
Expect for the sport part I resonate with this feeling a lot.
It's tough to just be you like Dr. K was saying Dom needs to find in himself. Introspection is the key and we need understand who you are and who others identify you as aren't the same. Life's a journey and we can just be in the moment.
Wow were people really expecting you to join the NFL? That’s some insane expectations right there, I don’t know how anyone can be disappointed in you for not living up to that. Especially when you aren’t particularly passionate about the sport.
Dom is basically me, minus the divorced parents. I’ve been watching Dr. K for a year now and this stream really helped me gain clarity over being stuck in between “two worlds” in my own way and trying to figure out a direction that caused me to be stuck for years.
Thank you for bringing Dom on- watching this was almost like having a session with Dr. K for me and hopefully others too who can relate.
BTW, Dom has a great podcasting or radio voice.
Yeah im also hikimori...
I can relate to him a lot too, except my parents eventually got back together a few years after separating. I guess happy endings do exist lol.
We consume entertainment so we can distract our brain from the big sad caused by existential loneliness. We are supposed to get our happy chemicals from human interaction, and when we can't get that we look for other ways to get our fix.
Well said
Brilliant.
Escapism
@@nootics you can't escape the fact that humans usually need other human interactions. Sure it works without some people live alone on some mountain but nobody can be forced to live this way
The real story.....harsh truth of reality can only be bearable through a coping mechanism
Man, the Chosen One is such a thoughtful, soft-spoken and self-aware dude. Having been stuck between worlds myself, on the other side of the ocean, I wish I could hang out with him.
If Dom ever reads this, thank you so much for sharing your story brother. A lot of what you were talking about with Dr. K is not easy to share by any means but I can tell this interview will help a lot of people; it helped me out for sure. Such a cool guy who deserves all the respect for this.
Thanks my man. It was scary coming on, and thinking about it I felt I talked too much and didn't let Dr. K speak. Thank you for the kind words:)
@@dominic3646 no. You speaking is the whole idea He just nudged you in particular directions.
@@dominic3646 Thank you for talking and sharing so much my friend. I am usually rock solid and I was crying hard when you were defending your Dad. I know that pain of feeling deep down that they did something wrong but still knowing you owe them so much and feeling torn. It is so hard to open up and you did it live on Twitch, seriously shows a strength of character and a deep down desire to feel better. I wish you all the best on your journey man.
@@dominic3646 Thanks for sharing Dom! I relate so much to what you shared. Can you tell us where we can find your blog. I really wanna check it out :)
I can relate a lot, especially the "filling" the time I can't balance my desire to consume Anime/ Manga and games and focus on study even tho I make progress it's so slow and with beeing harsh to myself I feel guilt for doing the things I like too much. It's a very weird form of guilt.
I feel like I'm going to be personally attacked by this one 😂
You'll get used to it! 😄
I literally skipped it for awhile because of this, hit too close to home lol.
Hmm. Honestly they didn't that much about anime. Just in terms what you willing to sacrifice. Learning how you are. Struggling with idenetity. Divorce. Trying to be who you are in the moment.
I consume because when I don't consume, I have this need to do something productive but I am literally trapped in a small room.
Same bro
oh interesting, i'd like to talk to you about that. if you want i'll give you my discord
@Sanningen you sound like a right wing libertarian dude
@Sanningen If a farmer could make an iPhone companies would’ve never been a thing my dude.
@@Ordinary_Peasant I think left wing libertarian because of the dislike of government and corporation but in the end those are just labels used to create divisions and conflict. You can't truly label anything accurately.
What a wholesome Weeb-Chad. Really enjoyed this interview
Giga-Weeb-Chad if you ask me
Good lord. "The greatest honor a man..." piece almost knocked me over.
I’ve been trying to figure out this exact problem for a little over a year now and this was so relatable and helpful in so many ways. These streams helped me really dig into recovering from DID, with the help of a great psychologist who also now lives way out of state. Now I’m struggling with a sort of recovery from the recovery, or the long term effects. So empty.
I think I’m going to start writing in my journal everyday asking myself “who am I going to be today? The kind of person who does ___ or ___?” And start answering.
I’ve been setting myself up for failure for so long, feeling trapped because I’m setting up these traps for myself. I’m scared of failure and even more scared of success. I get a high off the content binge. And then a bonus high off feeling ashamed because I’m so scared to succeed and scared to fail, but even more scared to just be okay with myself where I’m at. And to just be okay with doing the things I want to do.
Best of luck to Dom too, and I’ll try to make sure to check out the blog.
We can all gigachad this, guys! Hang in there!
How was you're DID treated and did you recover completely?
@@izio1111 thanks for asking! I can do my best to share a bit about my experience. There’s so much misinformation about DID that held me back.
Mostly lots of trauma/talk therapy. A lot of CBT, DBT, and really needed a will to do it. Asking myself a lot of hard questions.
Slow gentle and non-forced integration of alters over time looking back at old trauma/samskaras… kind of hard for me to explain, doing my best ^^
And then at the very end I did a little peyote with spiritual/religious intent (it’s legal in my state for “good faith religious/spiritual intent”, also I’m part native Osage so I think that’s a big part of why I felt a deep connection to it and thought it might work) I did it with my partner in a courageous mood with a lot of love and support and we opened up about personal traumas and it all just finally clicked together. I don’t know if the peyote would have worked without all that hard work building up to it, or if it was just the final push I needed, but I had a sort of worried, peaceful, then excited reaction to realizing I was all of me at the same time when it kicked in, lots of happy crying too.
I wouldn’t recommend anyone do it unless they are ready/know what you’re doing and if it’s legal in their area.
Not DID but I can relate. I once discovered self-actualization and it changed my life, except I became merely stable instead of happy and with a meaningful life. I wasn't completely useless anymore, but I'm still completely lost about what to do with my life, and am still grappling with nihilism on a daily basis. Glad you could turn your life around. Your boyfriend too sounds like an amazing human being! Best wishes.
@@destroyerinazuma96 thanks for best wishes! And likewise! I hope a pleasant journey for you to discover your current mission in life
"What am I going to do today?" feels like a fucking cheat code.
These are often more relatable because no time is spent talking about content creation and it's mostly on the viewer side of things, which we all are to some extent
It hurts how much ive related to almost this entire interview, especially the 2 worlds stuff and potential
I relate to this, it's weird considering myself as an outcast in that regard. I've been the type of person to not only like video games and anime, but also working out, drawing, playing instruments, editing, "spirituality," etc. I just like different things, and that might've overwhelmed me because I didn't understand how to "be" so I was naturally an outcast, middle school--througout college even. No matter how similar friends I'd find there's always a few things that still keep me an outcast, but I'm ok with that it's not really an issue.
Wow, I relate to this comment so strongly. I've always been the same way - pretty athletic and into sports like swimming, soccer, and baseball, and I workout at home. I've played piano for almost a decade, and share that aspect of my life with like 1 friend, and otherwise my connections there are online. Then, I've also always read a ton and been a bookworm and nerded out over Lord of the Rings and other series. I also play video games, both games with groups of friends like Call of Duty and FIFA, and playing Minecraft with others. Then to add on to that I got into anime over the last year, which I share with some friends, and not with others.
TL;DR: I'm into a ton of different things, and it's really hard for me to compartmentalize these things across my different friends and groups. Pretty much everyone finds parts of me weird and parts really cool, which makes me always just a little bit outcast.
Yup sounds like me too. I binge tv shows, anime, audiobooks, albums, games and hit the gym 4 times a week, keep my body fat around 12% and eat ridicously healthy, I code websites, do graphic design for games, do massive DIY projects renovating my home, read into politics, science, tech etc. I have kids now but I've single for 7 years now and though I don't ever find myself being lonely. Yet I feel I have this void or empty feeling, like is there more to life? I find myself questioning should I go on wild holidays, climb mountains or live extrovertly? yet those things I'm not interested in.
I have everything I want, as well as happiness and friends to talk to, but It's like maxing out a character in an RPG, the game gets a bit boring once it's too easy.
@@MELK0R87 Yeah, seems you're similar. Although I still have way more to do before I'm "maxed out," lol, primarily fixing my god awful time management and procrastination.
@@MELK0R87 aaa teach me how you manage to do all that, do you have 24h in a day too??
Lol, I'm not saying I do this all in one day. Take yesterday for example, I got the kids to school, then straight to the gym listening to Times of Grace's new album (wasn't good), then afterwards I was listening to pet semetary whilst mixing up some cement and ballast to fill a hole where I had re-plumbed my toilet waste the day prior, filled 15 bags of rubble, I then showered, played some genshin impact whilst watching some Dr K, I then tidied the house, did some meal prep in a slow cooker (it's more efficient and healthy, bone broth, rice, anti inflammatory veggies etc), got the washing out on the line, got to the shop for a weed cover, picked the kids up from school, then the kids and I were back in the garden picking weeds and I also had to render some parts of the outside walls as I noticed they were blown, then we then played mario 3d world together and watched some stranger things, got them to sleep after going back into the garden and using a lighter and house spray to kill gnats (more for entrainment than anything), then it was back on genshin whilst watching Dr K videos and editing a business card (play for a bit make some edits, repeat).
Come Wednesday I'll be working a condensed shift so I'll be stuck at my desk (at home) so I'll binge some anime, probably Dr stone. If I don't have anything to do around the house like I have recently then I'll spend my entire time watching anime/films/TV and playing games at the same time. I'm not socially awkward but I don't feel like what I do and who I appear to be are the same people. When I started my job this nerdy looking guy would never talk to me so I started a conversation with him one day as I noticed he had a Naruto keychain, we talked for hours and he said at the end I would never have guessed you were like this, once again not bragging but I'm sure it was because I was muscular and I dress well with clean haircut, from the outside I look like the typical guy who goes clubbing on the weekend. I just like to take care of myself and binge entertainment
I cannot stress how impactful these streams are, and even more so when Dr. K talks with regular folk who deal with a lot of the same problems that I face. I also need to try and channel a lot of the advice into my real life rather than just contemplating on it.
bros what mic is this guy using his audio is flawless!?
he also has nice voice
@@jaspa99 AHHHHH
im not sure but if it's detachable, it seems like the vmoda boom pro
replying in case someone says what mic it is bc i'm curious myself lol
@@jaspa99 true
this stream kinda fucked me up but in the good way. I was a colligiate track jumper, I played valorant competitively, and i grew up a musician playing guitar and also writing scores for small projects, split family, all the good stuff. I stopped school 23 units from my degree during covid and spent the last year not training, studying, or reading and just gaming hard and smoking a copious amount of weed. This was a really good guest, though I may be kinda biased. Hope you all have a healthyweek.
You as well boss man, glad you enjoyed
The part abt wanting to be hit by a car was strangely relatable-- not even just wanting to cease to exist but specifically by getting with a single blunt force that'll put me out immediately? Ig i specifically think of cars since its all i ever saw when commuting to and from school
the real chad move was bravely coming on and sharing your experiences my man. thank you Dom and Dr. K for this great and meaningful dialogue.
Am I about to watch a two hour video about why I spend too much time online? Yes.
Facts this is literlly me.
how much time do you spend online now? if it’s the same amount u know somethings gotta change
MAN do I relate to this guy. I have to keep my gaming/weeb side on the super down low when meeting people because I was part of that crowd.
Yeah...
I can not get enough of this… seeing men talk, heal, and learn themselves. Ugh my heart 🥺
It's clear how Dom keeps talking about how he's surrounded by friends. He's tight, bro! Anyone would want to be friends with Dom! He's the kind of guy that can do anything he wants... but just needs to figure out what he wants. Extremely great episode.
GOD I forgot how powerful these interviews are--damn.. I also hope this man knows he is very good and easy to love, I wish him so much joy and care and peace.
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
Dom you are a very brave person. Be proud of what you already accomplished. I think the best and hardest advice Dr. K gave was to open yourself to both your parents. I was in a Dark Place once and I was so ashamed to ask help. My house was a garbage dump, I did not have one single piece of clothing decent to wear, I did not had the strength to clean up my own house, I didn't even knew where to start, and was sick with myself because I felt like a loser. One day my father and stepmom went to have lunch with me (we live in different cities) and during lunch I got a lump in my throat and finally gained the courage to tell them not to go home. To come to my fucked up home and help me. I was so ashamed. But they came, they did not judge me, they spent the whole afternoon helping me clean up the house (dozens of thrash bags went away that day), they took all my clothes and washed and iron them. It was so hard for me, but I felt so relieved. I started again that day. I had someplace to start. I changed for the better, today I have not a perfect home but a decent one and a girl I love. All because I asked for help to people that are really not only my family but my friends. Love you and admire you Dom, for all that you experienced already and overcame. Life is hard and full of wonders and we should be grateful for all the good things and the lessons we learn along the way.
Thank you for sharing man. That situation you explained is easy to fall into as your mental state can be a very slippery slope. I respect your insight and know that it will benefit not only yourself, but those you interact with along the way. A quote I heard and love is "Everything we learn as young men, prepares us to be better Fathers." And I have a sense, that if and when your time comes. Your kids will be lucky to have you as a dad :) (Or mon, as you didn't state your gender and I'm just assuming lmao)
I've been in the same spot before, and arguably I'm still in it. I think the challenge is this transition phase where we were kids, and now we're adults with responsibilities. And we're simply not used to having this responsibility. Like we need to work out, spend time "grinding", which is all the stuff you don't like to do, but you have to do now that you're an adult. It's very easy to go back to a comfortable place. We grew up with the internet, video games, and you go back to this comfortable place where you don't have to deal with things you don't want to do. I don't think it's an addiction. As least to me. It's this attempt to find what was comfortable because often times, responsibilities can be uncomfortable, boring, tedious, meaningless.
This guy essentially is living exact same life as me. The only thing is i am a 24 white guy who just graduated college with his engineering degree. different sport and specific goals but other then that I COMPLETELY understand your struggle. I was a good wrestler (athletic all american in junior college) who also likes Gaming and anime/manga. It gets you stuck in this limbo land of not really getting along with the "losers" but you also dont get along with the "cool kids". We really are the "chosen one" in that we get the luxury of being able to live both types of lives if we choose to do so. I would get real pissed off after coming out of those gaming/anime binges and would take a step back and get angry/depressed with myself just like you described. I also have a HUGE problem with viewing myself after quarantine and how I let my physical body go. I am very much am stuck between two worlds as well. Thank you for taking the time to come on. Been a long time since i watched a stream that i so wholesomely resonated with. I too need to ask "what do i want to be today" every single day. I wish we could meet in person. we would be absolute homies.
Thanks for sayin that man. Over 2020 I gained like 24 pounds. And as a wrestler, I'm sure you can understand how important weight is when it comes to power/stamina. Trying to get back in shape has really been a struggle (Today I had to convince myself to finish the next set throughout the whole workout, almost walked out of the gym twice). I'm glad my issues were able to reach someone. Lets struggle on together
@@dominic3646 yes certain movements after gaining weight require way more energy. I've had to compesate through caffeine but it's only for short term... man that sht hurts
This
jeez dude stop acting like a victim.
Same bro exact story man but with a different sports and with physics
13:40 Dom: “A couple of weeks ago I binged watch Attack on Titans… from Friday to Sunday.”
Doctor K: *smiles and nods* “Nice.”
I WANT TO BOOK AN APPOINTMENT WITH YOI DOCTOR K!
That need to consume is something I relate to so much. I sometimes use anime and manga for motivation but then I don’t feel closure until I’ve completed the series. No matter how long it is. Then I move on to something else and the cycle continues.
His first mistake was getting into the smash community
Your profile picture is so funny with that comment
This but unironically, what a horrible environment
This is one of my fav episodes and I'm still floored by how good the conversation is. Game and watch anime because you enjoy it and are so passionate about it. Then slowly work on the other goals that interest you, but not because someone else told you to do it. And it's totally alright when your goals change! In the end, most people really care only about themselves, so don't put your happiness in the hands of best friends; everyone's human and can't meet all expectations set on them.
Dom thank you so much for going on the stream and doing this, insane respect. You opened up and you even knew it would help people by being honest. Thank you again Dom.
"You're already exactly what you need to be. It's okay not to be where you want to be".
I needed this ❤️
Thank you Dom. Related on a lot of things and uncovered a lot of things that I didn't know was there .Knowing someone else stuck between identities really helped me pull through these last couple dark days. Good luck and can't wait to see your update!
What an amazing interview. Thank you for everything you do, Dr. K. And thank you to the guest for being so wonderful and sharing his intimate life details. We appreciate it.
This was very relatable. One thing I wish they explored a bit more is the concept of "everyone wants to have written a book but nobody actually wants to write one" Is there an extra layer of growth to get to this point or is chasing goals futile? Do we need to learn to do actions in the present that we don't initially want to do for our goals or do we just accept that we aren't that person yet and may never be?
Check out the vid about Dharma, it helped me a lot when it comes to working to goals.
@@marreco6347 Thanks for the reply dude! Appreciate it. I know sometimes he probably has touched on things elsewhere that I might have missed since there are so many vods on youtube now. ^_^
I can not stress how much I can relate to him. Ive been binging anime and playing video games for the past 6 months. Its to the point I feel sick and tired of not being productive yet I dont do the things I plan to do.
Same. At the same time scheduling projects is scary due to fear of failure and fear of ridicule.
this conversation really helps, damn i feel like i dont hate me self anymore sometimes its ok to binge and then just keep going. i really want that mentality focus on now let go of the end, damn i am having this same hype that dom had in the end. dive in to now be who you wanna be right now. this channel is freaking amaizing.
despite the video title, I came into this one thinking I won't find it very relatable but it'll be interesting to watch just like other Dr. K interviews... but it WAS quite relatable to me, personally. especially the binge consumption of content like that.
Thanks to Dom for sharing his experience. I wish him all the best.
Hey Dom and Dr K, big thanks for doing this. It was very helpful, I wish you guys the very best. Lets go
That was a stroke of brilliance from good 'ol Alok at the end there. I have a feeling that was a calculated move on his part giving Dom the responsibility of proving people wrong that it can't be done. See how hyped up he was at the end. Love it.
Not gonna lie, kinda wanna be this guys friend.
Thanks for not lying... 😏
Why lie? 'Not gonna lie' that's weird to even say lol lying is a sin! Evil and leads to mental illnesses.
Dude, same. This guys cognitively 100%.
Thank you for baring your struggles for us Don. As you can see from the comments we’re all rooting for you and this conversation has helped at lot of us reflect on similar issues.
When he started tearing up a bit talking abt his dad, i really felt that. It was so sweet and sad ❤
I'm at that age where I took up new hobbies in favour of vidya. The reason I'm slowly giving gaming up is because personally, I don't want to support the industry for what it is doing and secondly, I feel like I've experienced everything there is to experience. I'm not a multiplayer guy, so I can't spend so much time online.
I took up motorcycle riding and camping instead, and traveling. Made some of it into a life goal (traveling across the country). Physical activities have their own rewards.
I'm not saying this because I want the bros to give up vidya. I just want them to find new avenues in life.
how has it been?
Come one man what does the gaming industry has done to you lmao
This is true gaming just became soul sucking and kinda dry sadly when u grinded so much that u could be doing things in the real world sadly :(
It really is nice to see a regualr viewer interview. The streamer interviews are genuinely helpful and insightful, but it can be nice to see the other side of the coin to see how these lessons can be applied for those of us who haven't made that jump towards success, fame, wealth, and maybe never will.
I love these because it helps me ask these questions for myself and try to answer them. I would love to have a one on one with Dr.K
We believe in you Dom!
But like, not in a "pressure to do every day perfectly" kinda way, more in the "you're already a cool and inspiring guy that can grow and accept himself more every day."
Just keep going, gigachad!
I cannot thank you enough for making this channel, so glad I could find it 🙏
This hit home. I’ve spent the last decade (maybe longer?) in this mindset, with it never really getting better. But I’ve always felt like I’ve been pretty good at living in the moment and accepting me as me, but it’s this outside pressure from what others expect of me that I feel is making me feel like living in the moment and appreciating it, isn’t enough.
Awesome interview. Always a pleasure listening to these. Props to this guy for opening up on the internet and thanks Dr k for all the great advice.
I turned to video games and anime because they are more interesting to me. I never fit in anywhere and still don’t and dealing with insecurities and ADHD(which i didn’t know I had the first 22 years of my life) these two were an escape. I know know I can’t keep running from a world that seems so alien to me. I have to confront my challenges in order to truly live.
Just watched a video by Academy of Udeas on how pursuing safety hurts people, and recalled Dr K. talking about how taking on more challenges is sometimes the solution. Therefore I can relate to what you're saying, though taking anything on scares me to no end. And it's not as much pants shitting sweaty fear as it is putting up a front, but then devising an exit strategy and running away from the problem as fast as possible when no one's watching. Hard stuff, man.
Ps Admiral Thrawn is a cool character :)
I relate to the having multiple good friends flaking/not being there for you so much. It happened to me yesterday, and it all just adds up. First I joined my friend's discord and they hit me with some light-hearted jokes, jokes that wouldn't usually bother me, but this time they did for some reason. I ended up just being silent and eventually left, I joined my other friends discord and I was saying "hello" for like a good 10-15 seconds before they even acknowledged me (they were deep in ranked game of Valorant). I ended up just leaving a few minutes later. I had plans to go to the bar that night to meet up with a couple coworkers. I was super tired and didn't really feel like going but I got myself up and ready anyway. One of the coworkers couldn't go because of something in the morning but the other coworker was still down to go. So I make my way to the bar and sit outside waiting for them to finish closing. I waited for like 15 minutes, saw my coworker get in their car, and then get a text saying, "Sorry, something came up with my kids at the house, I can't go". Totally reasonable, but in addition to everything that happened before, I was LIVID. Sad, depressed, lonely... I sat in my car, completely off and just sat there in silence for 20 minutes with so many thoughts going through my head. Thoughts of giving up, thoughts of not wanting to exist anymore, etc. I ended up just saying fuck it, and went inside the bar alone and just drank and ate by myself. Something I don't mind doing, but man was last night such a bad day. It was so bad I just called into work today.
What i love about this conversation was that I felt like it would be a good conversation for me to be in both with Dr. K AND Dom, so many themes that i actually have a opinion and personal experience, it is ultimately differently to the streamers show...
lets see how relatable this is...
Your profile Pic is giving me ptsd
100% relatable
I would say 99 percent relatable and most relatable right now
I hate how much I relate to this
I hate how much I relate to this
Dom if you're out there, when you report back on your quest a while from now, I hope you were able to answer the question of who are you most days. If you were not, remember you can still ask it again. And every day there's a whole life waiting for you in the present, in which you can figure it out.
So if you done it, congrats bud. If you didn't, let's give it another go homie. You ain't alone in that quest.
So much about this interview hits so close to home... not wanting to exist is something i've been dealing with recently aswell.
This was shockingly relatable to me, it was a bit upsetting at parts but im glad im not alone. You tend to forget that people have similar experiences to you which makes you feel more alone.
"It's okay not to be where you want to be, think about what you want to be today." Man that motivated me to vibe with myself the whole day plus it made me feel much better about myself too. Thank you!
1:37:15 I burst out laughing when he said this, I'm mixed (black and white) and my best friend in 6th grade wore his hair like JB and I remember frequently wishing my hair was straight enough for me to pull that off cause I thought it looked cool
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
I didn’t feel the two hours pass for me, I related to dom in so many ways especially family wise. I shed some tears and burst out a lot of laughs along the way, great stream!
This guy isnt stuck between, he's best of both worlds
This might be the most relatable one for me. And I appreciate that he's able to hold the conversation most of the time.
One of the best streams I have seen in a while. In my opinion, better than interviewing mainstream streamers
I can't stop consuming CZcams
Its actually so scary when i think about it. The amount of life and time ive invested into youtube being a consumer. I thought it would be like teenage thing but no its going on for like 10 years now and I dont know how to stop watching and not feel depressed.
Unsubscribe from every channel, delete CZcams on a phone and block it in your browsers. Month later, install it again, subscribe for USEFUL AND HELPFUL channels and set restrictions on usage time. Worked for me 🙂
@@degus7760 that's a bit extrem but sure can work the create an second acc with 0 subscriptions is a good start
dopamine trap.
@@degus7760 its not how it works man
You can't just say don't buy drugs to a drug addict
Awesome content man ! The being trapped between two words part is my favorite, I will think it out more
"you're watching some sus material online , and then you climax, and then you open your eyes, you come over the water and you're like "this is some gross stuff, i don't like this"" LMAO
Dr K's face when he goes into this out of nowhere 🤣
This interview is amazing and I learned a lot from this. I'm going through this same thing as him and can't focus on my studies. This started a couple of weeks ago after going through a mental breakdown/burnout and now I spend my time either playing genshin or reading(binging) manga instead of doing my assignments. Sleep schedule was ruined, my workout and meditation stopped, and my attention problem isn't helping much either. Now I'm trying to get back up by fixing my sleep schedule and meditating, but still don't feel motivated to study. Hopefully, things get better from here.
This but I dont got too school sadly my sleep schedule is messed up
I can't describe how close to home this whole interview hits, I- have some things to think about
This is a great talk, very relatable. Also, I am jealous of having a family LAN room and y'all gaming together! Good luck man
I don’t understand why he sees the binging games/shows it as an issue outside of the fact he skipped a workout the one time and doesn’t practice base as much as he wants. It feels like he’s got a misplaced sense of guilt based on games being considered a “waste of time” but it sounds like he actually enjoys it and just needs to work the other things he wants to do in more.
Same. I felt like he was pretty affected and influenced by those previous friends of his who looked down on the weeb/gamer/geek types.
consuming media to that degree is just inherently unhealthy
He just need to schedule better lol. If the guy keeps demonizing things that are fun to him he would only torture himself
@@Taylor_King "unhealthy" for him or for the society ?
@@xaen-kfpstammkunde3081 for anyone
I think Dom would be a great CZcamsr! He's multifaceted, he has an eye for things that are really good and he likes sharing those things with people. I think he wants to fill that void through creation, so he could make videos on his favorite shows and graphic novels or even learn on camera how to play bass or skateboard
I've related to almost everything that Dom has mentioned, and it's quite scary. Never in my entire life have I ever been able to put it so clearly in words but he just did it on stream like it was nothing.
Honestly, this was profound. Specifically, the portions about being who you want to be versus being who you are and the thoughts around the "Goal Oriented" mind. Whew. Struck like Mjolnir at the sentiments around "I just want to Rocky Montage my way through to the end" and "People want to have written a book but do not want to write the book." Man...
Thank you both.
I don't normally comment but hearing him talk about his dad made me start crying. Genuinely touching and I feel grateful he was willing to share that
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
I’m a full Latino first-gen American with blue eyes and white skin. Growing up with Latino culture but only having white friends led to many identity issues. Thank you for being brave and sharing your story. I resonated a lot with the way you think and how you interpret things.
I look forward to seeing your success story
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
I related a lot to this conversation. We all have goals, dreams, and desires. But today media, games, comics have become so immersive that we just binge and easily lose control.
Always need to take a step back, reflect, and ask ourselves what matters. Especially applies to our 20s.
Good luck to you Dom. 👍
That's where nihilism does one in. If one looks back and find an ugly void, and certainty that nothing is worth doing, things get bad very quickly.
man, i really loved this vod.. really resonated
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
Love you Dom
Wow, this video being uploaded was great timing. I was resisting the urge to play vanilla wow after reading 1 scientific paper for an upcoming exam covering 35 papers (though, now I'm just watching Dr. K, so while that's better, I'm still ultimately not working on what I need to).
I can relate a lot to what he is saying, I'm above average in looks and workout, so I've never appeared to others as a "gamer". Despite this, I'm a huge anime and gamer at heart and always have been. I can remember playing 8 hours of vanilla wow every day after high school.
I had to pause the video and write this comment when he stated his major. I'm currently a PhD student in nutritional sciences and I'm really struggling lately. I appear as having my life together and going in an upward trajectory to friends and family, but I feel the appearance is becoming more and more of a facade. The shift from take these classes and do well, to now your required classes are complete and focus only on research is very challenging. This challenge is enhanced when you have little lab experience, no project of your own, and no lab members working in a similar area in the lab.
Man, I'm studying publishing and I haven't touched my thesis in months. I hate research with a burning passion, so it's not helping either. Highlight of my year was an internship. Ever since it ended, I'vs been gaming non stop.
Is this truth: from my observations vast majority of people who suffer from consuming media (not counting ones with addictive behavior like this man) is actually not from consuming media but from beating themselves for having "wrong" priorities?
I agree
Reminds me of ED recovery methods, where the shame, scarcity, lack of control of dieting feeds into the cycle of binge eating or anorexia.
@@alexanderbrandt9816 I think the term escapism alone is stigmatizing and negative. I play games or watch movies because I want to do this, I enjoy it. This is only the problem if you really don't want to
Like he said about him playing basketball, for myself I can recognize a few reasons I do it.
1. I don’t like being alone with my thoughts
2. I wish I had a group, so I dive into new fandoms and shit
3. My goals and priorities feel overwhelming when I face them without the right attitude
Idk, I don’t really beat myself up about it, I just see how it’s negatively impacting my life, (I dont have a job or go to school, I don’t really do anything “productive” and it’s hurting my life/future)
But honestly playing games, watching Netflix, twitch, CZcams is so much more enjoyable than everything else, I’m not upset at myself for doing what feels good, I’m upset that it’s so difficult to find a path in life that seems to fit me, I’m upset that I don’t know a productive way that also doesn’t feel incredibly painful
I’m lost, so I escape and distract myself in media entertainment, hoping eventually a path will reveal itself to me
Maybe being a CZcamsr or streamer is the right path, but I’ve never tried because I don’t believe that I could be successful
Anyways thanks for letting me vent a little here lol
I can relate to u Dom.. U r not the only one.... Lost in certain stage of life... We ll become stronger together and win the life.. . Maybe Goku said it already 💪🏼
I relate alot with Dom, I think a lot of ppl can, which is also sad so many of us feel we're wasting our time and want to do better but something inside just prevents it
This is very good and very helpful
god damn his life mirrors mine so much, that was 100% my experience when i was younger, and it eventually led to hardcore drug abuse when i hit the exact point that he's at - where you fully realize what you've done and even have some serious introspection about why it is that you do what you do but the compulsion is too strong.
literally i did the exact same thing: deep dives into video games and all kinds of subjects that just pop up initially as fleeting thoughts or suggestions. benders that last for fucking weeks, and then you get moments to breathe, it could be something as simple as being emotionally vulnerable and introspective while talking to a friend you made online or even just taking notice of how much time has passed since you stepped outside. it's absolutely crushing. i got unlucky (in a sense) that i ended up getting exposed to opiates essentially at this exact moment, and to compound that the drug use was a social thing (as in i did it as a means to get closer with other people initially) and eventually ended up continuing to use because the euphoria covered up the anhedonia i was starting to feel when i was no longer able to enjoy gaming like i once did.
also, i wouldn't say i was a chad in the same way he is when i was younger, i didn't have a lot going on beyond being a bad kid and running the streets in my neighborhood, but i will say i would have considered myself very socially intelligent and very much a part of the culture (inner city neighborhood, really bad place to grow up) and that allowed me to both be cool with the popular kids while still empathizing emotionally and intellectually with a more outcast, socially awkward crowd. i think i would've probably come out alright (or maybe not, it's totally possible i would've ended up trapping and in prison or dead) if i stayed in the city rather than moving out to BFE at 14 where there was no chance at being around people if i wanted to
im a part of the Dr. Kult, this stuff is really enlightening and helpful just to watch. even if its not directly relatable to me, it feels therapeutic just to hear them talk.
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
This interview was brilliant! This guy is so well spoken!
man he is so handsome
Of course its dr k
I didn't know when I decided to watch this I'd see myself. It's just in a male bass-loving self, rather than female dance-loving self. Dude, the whole story mirrors mine... The parents, the anime needs, the porn pun/joke thingy, the jealousy towards 'more stable' families, fascination about getting hit by a car.. I... am speechless.
I am in so much tears listening to him. All he said is so relatable. Wanting to belong, disappointment, dissatisfaction etc. he is so articulate with his thought and makes it so relatable.
anime and video games is dogshit!
Superhero and Horror movies is better
video games and anime is lame!!!!!!!!
@@Warning-34079 *are
i mean, i would watch the heck out of the chosen one's streams, his honesty and his natural way of talking about things is really great