Mo'Nique Tells Black Women Not To Wear Bonnets in Public

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  • čas přidán 13. 09. 2024

Komentáře • 4,7K

  • @beauty4667
    @beauty4667 Před 3 lety +3575

    Ghetto isn’t an income bracket, it’s a mindset.

    • @Im_Monique
      @Im_Monique Před 3 lety +46

      Preach🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️ this statement

    • @mrspgrew
      @mrspgrew Před 3 lety +20

      True

    • @alfordromney8784
      @alfordromney8784 Před 3 lety +19

      Well said

    • @moonlite1752
      @moonlite1752 Před 3 lety +46

      THANK YOU!!! Please say it louder! And they need to stop blaming it on “the younger generation”. Like, stop!🤨😒

    • @Blessedwoman67
      @Blessedwoman67 Před 3 lety +15

      Yes lord you just drop the mic!! Amen sister.

  • @MaryLou913
    @MaryLou913 Před 3 lety +1219

    She didn’t say anything wrong and wore kids gloves when delivering her message. She insisted that we instill pride back into our appearances. You know you ain’t supposed to be out in PJs, house shoes and no bonnet.

    • @locksalot7152
      @locksalot7152 Před 3 lety +16

      🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿

    • @mssugamoma
      @mssugamoma Před 3 lety +15

      Ghetto

    • @patlui7542
      @patlui7542 Před 3 lety +9

      High FIVE ! 💯🎉🎉🎉🎉💕

    • @Dionne3116
      @Dionne3116 Před 3 lety +20

      I agree but do you see the irony of her saying this in a bath robe with no bra & a million followers. 😕

    • @christopherbrown5409
      @christopherbrown5409 Před 3 lety +55

      @@Dionne3116 in her home, not on the street.

  • @Jeanie7933
    @Jeanie7933 Před 3 lety +555

    She talked about other behaviors as well. Not just the bonnet. She told the absolute truth. Have pride when ya step out in these streets.

    • @natinapowell7990
      @natinapowell7990 Před 3 lety +5

      So true!

    • @MyHoney2222
      @MyHoney2222 Před 3 lety +18

      @Jeanie7933… You are absolutely correct - Monique addressed a number of things as they related to how someone should carry oneself in public.
      Funky Dineva is also CORRECT … there is a difference between Ghetto and poor.
      “Ghetto “behavior is disgusting whereas being “poor “ is a financial state or condition a person is in - nothing to do with BEHAVIOR.
      It certainly is ironic that generally speaking - these Loud, Aggressive, slipper & pajama wearing women are the same ones with hair not combed - and wearing a bonnet .
      Therefore this conversation is NOT about stereotyping Black women wearing bonnets - it’s about leaving your home looking messy, unkept and sloppy and not having any pride about how you present yourself in public.
      The way you DRESS 👗 is the way you will be ADDRESSED !!!
      No One knows who you are - but they certainly can see the way you look.
      We may not want to admit it - but most human beings use the VISUAL to make a snap decision or judgement call - this is just the way our brains are wired.
      Hindsight is 20/20 .,.. but first impressions are typically LASTING impressions.

    • @KWoo10DesignsLLC
      @KWoo10DesignsLLC Před 3 lety +5

      You are right. It’s not about the bonnet. It’s about the image of Black people because we know that we represent each other. We see ourselves in each other. That’s why we get emotionally triggered every time something happens to one of US. When you wear a bonnet in public you are look at in a certain way. It’s the same as the half dressed Whypipo you see at Walmart. Take a few seconds to throw on some sweats, jeans or a hat. Stop wearing your sleepwear in public cause nasty behind is just bringing the outside into your bed.

    • @tylx3000
      @tylx3000 Před 3 lety +2

      That PART!!!!! I see no lies lol A satin bonnet is for bed lol but if you wanna wear it in public go awf I guess lol but don’t be surprised if ppl stop n stare.

    • @nikajay9893
      @nikajay9893 Před 3 lety +6

      Pride in this racist ass system people don’t care anymore

  • @aprilella5027
    @aprilella5027 Před 3 lety +489

    It's messy bun life for me. I'm not stepping out in no bonnet, PJ's, or slippers nowhere period.

    • @rodnape
      @rodnape Před 3 lety +10

      Or a hat!

    • @traciescott1871
      @traciescott1871 Před 3 lety +3

      Gen x......

    • @LadyLoveMsSunshine
      @LadyLoveMsSunshine Před 3 lety +4

      Right! Neverrrrrr

    • @traciescott1871
      @traciescott1871 Před 3 lety +4

      @@LadyLoveMsSunshine I can see you've been released from the hospital..that has happened but when straight to pharmacy then HOME! Other than that...um, yea.. it's going to be a not happening. You never know "who" you might run into.

    • @LadyLoveMsSunshine
      @LadyLoveMsSunshine Před 3 lety +6

      @@traciescott1871 if I'm being released from the hospital or any place like that my mom or one of my sister's will definitely make sure I'm not wearing a bonnet...they know better. If anything they'll slap a wig on my head first LOL

  • @RP.123
    @RP.123 Před 3 lety +1895

    Its crazy how EVERYONE was laughing at Derrick Jaxn’s wife for wearing a bonnet but as soon as someone addresses not wearing it out in public we got all kinda bonnet advocates. Folks be so wishy washy

  • @PRTEEGRL
    @PRTEEGRL Před 3 lety +792

    It’s a shame that someone had to publicly address this. My grandmother and my mother taught me to never leave the house without wearing clean clothes, having my hair combed, and wearing my lipstick. Smelling good was a must too!! We’ve got to bring back the pride ladies!!

    • @evitathediva371
      @evitathediva371 Před 3 lety +16

      👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

    • @rogers5622
      @rogers5622 Před 3 lety +40

      Right . Some people are not taught that u don't get back in your bed with those same PJs you wore on the airplane 👀

    • @bricbrac28
      @bricbrac28 Před 3 lety +9

      Period. Nothing else to discuss!

    • @candidbutsweet9613
      @candidbutsweet9613 Před 3 lety +23

      I agree with Monique and I applaud her for falling on the sword for the betterment of our people.. We can do better. THE TIME IS NOW! WE HAVE TO WALK IN OUR GREATNESS 💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾

    • @CallMeBossLady
      @CallMeBossLady Před 3 lety +14

      @@candidbutsweet9613 I stand with aunti Monique also. She told no lies tho.

  • @crystalanderson6345
    @crystalanderson6345 Před 3 lety +279

    Personally, I would never ever wear a bonnet in public. They are meant to be slept in. Not worn out in public. Have some pride about yourself.

    • @miacarter8097
      @miacarter8097 Před 3 lety +12

      Thank you! That's exactly how I feel.

    • @Amanda-th6pi
      @Amanda-th6pi Před 3 lety +5

      Exactly!!!

    • @chillcharm7822
      @chillcharm7822 Před 3 lety +8

      it says on the pack ONLY WEAR THEM INSIDE ? no

    • @ktee1424
      @ktee1424 Před 3 lety +3

      @@chillcharm7822 My sentiments, exactly. I don’t wear bonnets out, but I also don’t wear sombreros out and don’t understand what classifies one as sleep headwear and lacking pride vs. any other. We can all choose what we like to wear or don’t like to wear when we go out, but it seems silly to pass judgment about who wears what to a place we simply choose not to. Where does the bonnet package or tag say only for sleeping? If it doesn’t, why are we stereotyping, assuming, judging, and criticizing women for where they choose to wear which head or hair coverings?🙄

    • @chillcharm7822
      @chillcharm7822 Před 3 lety +3

      @@ktee1424 exactly some women just like hearing themselves talk tbh and they want to feel like their better just cause they won’t wear it but it doesn’t make anybody better I would say one is insecure if she feels she needs to wear make up everyday

  • @caseys9641
    @caseys9641 Před 3 lety +436

    I don’t care how many ads CZcams puts on these videos, I’m still not buying premium 😂

  • @floridagirl5207
    @floridagirl5207 Před 3 lety +472

    We was offended by the character Auntie Jemima being a representation of black women. It’s important for us to present ourselves in the best way in public.

    • @VanessaElizabeta
      @VanessaElizabeta Před 3 lety +4

      Valid point.

    • @letakeokuk5446
      @letakeokuk5446 Před 3 lety +16

      Ooh @Florida Girl. I’m so glad you said it....these bonnets are no where near attractive...giving off Aunt Jemima vibes. No one is saying dress up but the bedroom look ...... no not what I would do, EVER. Maybe it’s my age group that thinks a different way from the millennials🥺

    • @KinkyXristian
      @KinkyXristian Před 3 lety +1

      Sheeeed---the woman with the box braids in a Mr. Clean commercials used to irk me too lol

    • @Red1Green2Blue3
      @Red1Green2Blue3 Před 3 lety +10

      @@VanessaElizabeta Not valid at all. The problem with aunt jemima is about how white people (and corporations) portray us - black people not having agency over our own bodies. We need to stop policing each other, white people don't feel responsible for the actions of the trashy members of their ethnicity

    • @jb3702
      @jb3702 Před 3 lety +2

      @@Red1Green2Blue3 I hear you but I don't know if we can/ should compare ourselves to them.

  • @shubbrown
    @shubbrown Před 3 lety +368

    I always say, “we have lost our self respect. This generation has no self respect therefore don’t respect others.”

    • @Red1Green2Blue3
      @Red1Green2Blue3 Před 3 lety +19

      middle aged to old people been saying this every generation since the victorian era. Moral panic isnt new

    • @welawe5804
      @welawe5804 Před 3 lety +11

      Thank u! Us older folks have forgotten what we was doing in our 20’s. Let the young generation do their thang!

    • @princesspassiveincome
      @princesspassiveincome Před 3 lety +1

      AMEN!!!!

    • @cjjones6264
      @cjjones6264 Před 3 lety +8

      I'm a product of the 60's. I got several years on Monique. My parents sang that same song back in the 60's, and you know they did! Their parents sang the same song back in the 40's, and on and on and on! We keep singing this same tune to younger generations. I don't know if it's our last ditch effort to assert superiority and dominance before death or what. Cut it out people! Make your own impression on the world. DO YOU! and stop expecting every other Black Person to DO YOU Too! We can reprimand these nieces and nephews in our own biological families, but we can go around the world being Bonnets Police and Saggy Pants Patrols to the entire Community of Black Folks.
      One more thing.... can you imagine if all this energy was put into how they are still trying to take away our vote; have introduced more than 400 Jim Crow bills in almost every state; trying to remove even more black history from school curriculum; over-policing our communities; police cover-ups; and trying to re-install a White Supremacist to the White House by August???? smh. Those are the things that will affect the Black Community. Yet, and still - here we are, talking about a damn Bonnet.

    • @shelley-anneharris6817
      @shelley-anneharris6817 Před 3 lety +10

      For me...it's the incessant calling of each other.....hoes and bitches. When and how have we as black women come to settle for this? Not just settle but accept that doing so is cool?

  • @MsFrageria
    @MsFrageria Před 3 lety +318

    How you dress or represent yourself can also boost how you feel…looking presentable can make you ready for any occasion.

    • @franettesparks9949
      @franettesparks9949 Před 3 lety +7

      Well said!

    • @angelmiller9254
      @angelmiller9254 Před 3 lety +6

      I Agreed

    • @mrs.germain4911
      @mrs.germain4911 Před 3 lety +5

      Yes!

    • @reinamacaren-a4132
      @reinamacaren-a4132 Před 3 lety +6

      How people feel is their business. As long as they aren't harming anyone, who cares?

    • @antoinerobeson4434
      @antoinerobeson4434 Před 3 lety +6

      What is sad is that this is actually a conversation. You mean to tell me with everything going on in the world that this is the best we could come up with is Women wearing freaking bonnets bro??? C'mon, it's not that serious! People just need to mind their business and stop trying to change the world with how a person should present themselves in public. There's far to much going on in this world to be focusing on head gear!!! Tf!!!!

  • @blueseah1
    @blueseah1 Před 3 lety +300

    It's not just the bonnet. It's the dusty ass looking pajamas, gray unlotioned hands, & face, loud phone conversation, and house slippers!

  • @alizeshelby3028
    @alizeshelby3028 Před 3 lety +250

    I’m 23 years old and I completely agree with Monique .... bonnets ARE FOR BED TIME !

    • @Berth407
      @Berth407 Před 3 lety

      Exactly!

    • @kevincarter2638
      @kevincarter2638 Před 3 lety

      So gym shorts only for the gym 🤔

    • @alizeshelby3028
      @alizeshelby3028 Před 3 lety +1

      I don’t go to the gym 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @kevincarter2638
      @kevincarter2638 Před 3 lety +4

      @@alizeshelby3028 so u just missed my whole point🤦🏾‍♂️ I can tell you are 23 😂

    • @makishacox6100
      @makishacox6100 Před 3 lety

      I wear bonnets during surgeries at the hospital.
      They are cute and fancy now

  • @Breeeee03
    @Breeeee03 Před 3 lety +817

    I have always loved how my mom carries herself. She wouldn't even walk to the mailbox without looking put together. So I followed suit. Being put together doesn't mean a full face of makeup, a Gucci fit and red bottoms. You can look presentable in sweat pants. I am not one to police what women should or shouldn't wear , but I will always take pride in my appearance. There was a point in time when our ancestors were not even allowed to look presentable!!

    • @MrsButtersworth82
      @MrsButtersworth82 Před 3 lety +16

      Exactly!!

    • @pgdarling301
      @pgdarling301 Před 3 lety +12

      Yes ma'am!!

    • @geocyo8835
      @geocyo8835 Před 3 lety +33

      That's it! Our ancestors were not _allowed_ to look presentable. For (Black) women in Louisiana, once upon a time, there was an ordinance that they must cover their hair because White wives of men in charge of legislature were jealous of the attention the Black women would get because of their hair.

    • @stacylala2816
      @stacylala2816 Před 3 lety +3

      Facts!!!

    • @ms.juhntialit7664
      @ms.juhntialit7664 Před 3 lety

      @@MrsButtersworth82llo

  • @Night88owl
    @Night88owl Před 3 lety +257

    If you’re upset about what Monique said, she was clearly talking about you. Hit dogs always holler.

    • @traceytracey3756
      @traceytracey3756 Před 3 lety +4

      😂😂Exactly!

    • @FrauMase
      @FrauMase Před 3 lety +3

      🤣🤣🤣🤣 facts!

    • @kristijjones1087
      @kristijjones1087 Před 3 lety +2

      #BoomBamPow....Enough said

    • @teachertan1
      @teachertan1 Před 3 lety +1

      😂😂😂

    • @DaFinestDuchess
      @DaFinestDuchess Před 3 lety +11

      I’m upset with the standards and judgement placed on black people by black people. White people do not do that to other white peoples.

  • @YvetteB04
    @YvetteB04 Před 3 lety +398

    I was taught: "Dress for the life you want NOT the life you have." "First impressions are EVERYTHING!"
    What Monique said, is stated by many more times than not in conversations. She has a large platform and she utilized it to convey the sentiments of many. It's not just about a hair bonnet and slippers. It's about decorum. Having an energy of worthiness.
    You can't walk around looking like and behaving like the stereotype, then mad when you're treated like the stereotype.
    I'm a professional woman with a teenage daughter and I'm empowering her with the sense of worthiness.
    Any and all that are offended are the intended targets of Monique's message. Get it together so that it doesn't offend you.

    • @kairilyn
      @kairilyn Před 3 lety +9

      Period!

    • @brokgrl85
      @brokgrl85 Před 3 lety +11

      🗣️DÉCORUM

    • @ktee1424
      @ktee1424 Před 3 lety +12

      More focus should be given to why we’re developing and fueling the stereotypes to begin with... I’m not offended because this doesn’t apply to me, but I also wouldn’t venture to associate a woman’s worth or decorum with where or when she chose to wear which cap or head covering. It’s silly to assume anything about anyone based on a single article of clothing that hasn’t been mass / universally produced to only be worn to bed / in home🙄

    • @jasminehill6312
      @jasminehill6312 Před 3 lety +5

      Say That!!!!!

    • @Moonewitch
      @Moonewitch Před 3 lety +3

      💯💯💯💯💯🙌🙌🙌🙌

  • @BeautifullyMade-ur6yc
    @BeautifullyMade-ur6yc Před 3 lety +2002

    It's sad because people are attacking Monique but she's just trying to help us. As black women, we need to learn how to take criticism a little better. If the black man/women can't tell us anything, who can?! It's just ridiculous.

    • @lisasimpson8607
      @lisasimpson8607 Před 3 lety +136

      Amen sis. We don’t have to cuss out everybody about everything.

    • @rogers5622
      @rogers5622 Před 3 lety +125

      Exactly . The offended are the offenders🤔

    • @JaneOrShine
      @JaneOrShine Před 3 lety +55

      Help us? Her whole platform was built on body shaming other women.

    • @maryjanesbaby9392
      @maryjanesbaby9392 Před 3 lety +47

      Monique came off as passive aggressive. So how was she helping us when she was the same woman that stood on stage and disrespected Oprah, Tyler Perry, and Lee Daniels publicly.

    • @BeautifullyMade-ur6yc
      @BeautifullyMade-ur6yc Před 3 lety +100

      @@maryjanesbaby9392 Just because she had a disagreement with those people, doesn't mean she isn't for us. And FYI: she opened up to Oprah and told her about her brother molesting her. Oprah went behind her back and had her estranged brother and mom on the show to exploit her. I'd have beef with her too. Smdh

  • @pinkpetals601
    @pinkpetals601 Před 3 lety +219

    I personally like wearing hats, turbans, or those pretty head wraps. You will never ever catch me anywhere with a bonnet or pajamas. I take too much pride in myself and I was not raised that way. Thank God for my upbringing.

    • @melanatedhoneyforever137
      @melanatedhoneyforever137 Před 3 lety

      AMEN!!

    • @kayfeathers7209
      @kayfeathers7209 Před 3 lety +1

      The fact dusties are debating THIS!! My gawd it’s so ghetto and tacky to wear a rag and pjs in the street. I could NEVER. I was called rude and classist 😂

  • @marishajames3581
    @marishajames3581 Před 3 lety +870

    We wanna twerk in restaurants and wear bonnets while running our errands. We have some serious shadow work to do. I will say this. If you’re gonna wear a bonnet, make sure it’s clean and not old, oily and stretched out. Do you boo! I however will never be caught out in public with a bonnet. It’s not a head wrap.

    • @melaniesaunders8950
      @melaniesaunders8950 Před 3 lety +44

      Preach and dropping your kids off like that to school is unacceptable as well wearing bonnets and slippers I agree we as a collective got a long way to go I was raised not to go out in public looking a mess period

    • @jaiblessed6337
      @jaiblessed6337 Před 3 lety +15

      I've worn a bonnet a few times to the neighborhood store for a quick run but the tweaking I can not. And I agree make sure they're clean.

    • @melaniesaunders8950
      @melaniesaunders8950 Před 3 lety +6

      @@jaiblessed6337 see that’s fine it’s not everyday wear for you

    • @faiththomas1749
      @faiththomas1749 Před 3 lety +7

      @@melaniesaunders8950 I am a certified tomboy ( the ONLY time I wore a dress was my senior prom ( and it wasn’t even a dress it was a pantsuit, I have long sleeve shirts and the only time I ever wear something “cute “ is if I am forced too ( I usually wear sneakers, pants and a long sleeve shirt

    • @shadyzbabii420
      @shadyzbabii420 Před 3 lety +23

      Who is we? You see whites calling out other whites? The richest white people wear the dustiest, crustiest clothing and sneakers...yell at black people in restaurants, on the streets, at traffic lights ..but dancing and wearing bonnets is an issue?

  • @shantahughes3568
    @shantahughes3568 Před 3 lety +737

    People killing me focusing on half of her statement. She talked about the idea of trifling broads wearing pjs and house shoes as well. It isn’t sanitary to wear outside something you have sweated in laid up in the house in not washed your behind in and decided to go to the airport. You can’t be that busy. How you show up in the world says a lot about you. I see broads in pjs, house shoes and bonnets I think that person did not wash her ass period. It’s the lazy trifling behavior that bothers me.

    • @rubysbaby822
      @rubysbaby822 Před 3 lety +48

      If you think people just get put of bed and not wash to go to the airport because they are in pjs you’re dumb.

    • @Conversations_with_Jazz
      @Conversations_with_Jazz Před 3 lety +76

      Some people are really triggered 😤, but I agree sis. I see this shit everyday and it’s trifling, somewhere down the line women have dropped the ball, why is it acceptable to walk around in house clothes in the street, and for some women to think it’s ok to just show up any kind of way anywhere, let’s me know what the mindset is..... “Ghetto.” It’s not that hard to throw on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt.

    • @BlackAdonis73
      @BlackAdonis73 Před 3 lety +6

      Exactly!!!

    • @caramel-cutie065
      @caramel-cutie065 Před 3 lety +4

      Yes ma’am!!!! I agree ☝️.

    • @teebee4000
      @teebee4000 Před 3 lety +5

      @@Conversations_with_Jazz Simple and well said!

  • @Tiger44140
    @Tiger44140 Před 3 lety +262

    The irony of this is I actually heard Monique say in an interview, “never leave the house looking like shit” and I actually wrote that on a cute flash card and posted it by the door, cause hell, it’s true!!!

    • @welawe5804
      @welawe5804 Před 3 lety +3

      But she did a whole live with a robe on...hypocrisy at its finest. What happened to looking presentable? I’m never taking Monique’s advice cuz she loud and ghetto her damn self minus the bonnet.

    • @nikajay9893
      @nikajay9893 Před 3 lety +3

      But she looked crazy while saying it in A robe with no bra 😏

    • @RHOgu4
      @RHOgu4 Před 3 lety +8

      @@welawe5804 Her hypocrisy doesn’t invalidate her point. It would only do that if you were more intent on focusing on the messenger than the message itself. It would be true whether she said it a robe or ball gown.

    • @RHOgu4
      @RHOgu4 Před 3 lety +3

      @@nikajay9893 So then you agree with her - that there are standards to looks and how one presents themselves to the public. You recognize that she didn’t meet her own bar by how she presented herself in that moment. Your acknowledgment of this supports and adds to her point.
      Edited to add: I️ agree with you and Mo, btw. Coming in public in sleep clothing without the proper undergarments does look “crazy”. Non verbal communication is just as loud as blasting your music through Walgreens.

    • @candylove49
      @candylove49 Před 3 lety +12

      @@RHOgu4 Exactly, anything to take away from the POINT. They don’t want to take accountability for themselves at all. She was also wearing a robe in the comfort of her home.

  • @asiaz248
    @asiaz248 Před 3 lety +616

    A hit dog will Holla lol. I 100% stand with Mo'nique. She's simply correcting us with love. Too many people hate correction.
    *Update
    Yall really mad about my opinion? Well stay mad! 🤣💜

    • @blakely1976
      @blakely1976 Před 3 lety +24

      💯! Too many hate correction and accountability!

    • @pimpindymepiece
      @pimpindymepiece Před 3 lety +31

      this the one. I didnt feel offended or affected at all- i took it as sound advice and kept it pushing. The hit dogs are in comments HOWLINNNNN lol

    • @shadyzbabii420
      @shadyzbabii420 Před 3 lety +7

      She delivered the message to MILLIONS in a bathrobe with no bra.

    • @deaflistener
      @deaflistener Před 3 lety +19

      @@shadyzbabii420 She was at home....

    • @alyciacooper2
      @alyciacooper2 Před 3 lety +13

      @@shadyzbabii420 she was indoors tho

  • @giovannalbradley
    @giovannalbradley Před 3 lety +59

    Monique's right. Wearing bonnets in public and online is classless and tasteless

    • @glowpopupcommentary9183
      @glowpopupcommentary9183 Před 3 lety

      👍Totally Agree...KEEP YOUR
      BONNET IN THE HOUSE👀
      There are to many 👁JAZZY
      HATS THAT YOU COULD
      WEAR..."OUTSIDE"😊

  • @ckjbabiesstringer629
    @ckjbabiesstringer629 Před 3 lety +397

    Toya’s bonnet line is “BEFORE “BED” HEADS”! Bonnets are to be worn to BED or inside your HOME!

    • @advancedmaternalmae7671
      @advancedmaternalmae7671 Před 3 lety +28

      idc what she calls it it after I paid for it I wear it when and how I want

    • @ckjbabiesstringer629
      @ckjbabiesstringer629 Před 3 lety +16

      @@advancedmaternalmae7671 That’s your prerogative! Do as you please!

    • @genuineheart7070
      @genuineheart7070 Před 3 lety +2

      @@advancedmaternalmae7671 😊😁👏🏽👏🏽

    • @ktee1424
      @ktee1424 Před 3 lety +5

      Furthermore, is every bonnet Toya’s brand? Do all or even most bonnets’ packaging or tags say anything about wearing to bed or inside your home? If not, who cares where, when, or why anyone wears a bonnet vs. any other cap?

    • @Moonewitch
      @Moonewitch Před 3 lety +5

      @@advancedmaternalmae7671 You should create your own damn race them. Pathetic.

  • @Andrea51108
    @Andrea51108 Před 3 lety +323

    I spend a $100 every 2 weeks getting my hair silk pressed. I’m guilty of wrapping it up, putting on a ball cap, and running a quick errand or two (a la how you described early in the video). For all the public knows, I have either a fade or a short cut under my cap, because there is no evidence of the wrap underneath.
    Bonnets were made for sleeping. There is no way, in my opinion, to make a bonnet look presentable - bedazzled or not. Add the PJs, slides, and poor public decorum… no ma’am. I 100% agree with Monique on this one 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @nikkyluv2244
      @nikkyluv2244 Před 3 lety +23

      Same... Before I locked my hair, I would put a hat on over a scarf in a minute, ( what’s the difference they ask)? Everyone recognizes a hat to be for outside... scarfs are associated with sleeping

    • @dougedoug2105
      @dougedoug2105 Před 3 lety +2

      One of the best things to ever happen to me years ago was a falling out with my barber. I easily gave him $100/ month getting my haircut, but our issues forced me to take some initiative & cut my own hair. The wake up call was that my barber was a homeowner and I was not. $2400/ yr on a stylist is a tad bit excessive when I personally learned how to cut my hair right here on the CZcams; even learned how to do do hair watching Tyler Perry’s on set stylist Deeper Than Hair. She even plays trap music while teaching people how to silk their own 😉

    • @sassygreen5024
      @sassygreen5024 Před 3 lety

      Girl store runs dont count...

    • @gonewin
      @gonewin Před 3 lety +7

      @@sassygreen5024 do you have a store in your house? Because if not, it does count because you're outside in the public.

    • @nikkyluv2244
      @nikkyluv2244 Před 3 lety +5

      @@sassygreen5024 outside is outside babes lol

  • @mrsgigi8862
    @mrsgigi8862 Před 3 lety +174

    I was on a flight from Baltimore to Ft Lauderdale years ago and there was a group of sistas on the flight wearing sweats, bonnets, flip flops and being all kinds of loud. I was so annoyed and embarrassed. Doesn't mean I'm tapping anybody on the shoulder. I just tried to ignore them and mind my business. It's just not something I would wear. I really don't think Monique was wrong in what she said. Like someone else said in the comments, we have to be able to take criticism.

    • @sylviabell5871
      @sylviabell5871 Před 3 lety +6

      So it’s actually not the bonnets sweat pants or flip flops. They could’ve been wearing anything and still be loud.

    • @ROYAL12366
      @ROYAL12366 Před 3 lety

      I’m glad you minded your business!

  • @tikaavery
    @tikaavery Před 3 lety +80

    I remember when I was younger about to leave to go to the mall with my friends, my mama checked the shit out of me because I was wearing a bonnet… She said I was not about to leave the house looking like I just rolled out of bed… I carried that lesson with me till this day!! Thank you Mommy!!

    • @mariaddubkg531
      @mariaddubkg531 Před 3 lety +10

      Yes indeed! I get what you said. I tried to go over my mommas house with a scarf on and when I got there she read me down and told me to go in the bathroom and comb my hair out. She was not having it and I never forgot it. I respected and obeyed my momma no matter how old I was😂

  • @laterramiller4507
    @laterramiller4507 Před 3 lety +131

    My mom told me always look a little presentable when you go out in public, because you never know who you gonna run into that you know.

    • @ShayMac311
      @ShayMac311 Před 3 lety +5

      Yeesss same.

    • @brownbeauty8578
      @brownbeauty8578 Před 3 lety +4

      THIS 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

    • @donnac.3273
      @donnac.3273 Před 3 lety +5

      Exactly, I was in the mall picking up some items speaking to the cashier asking how her day was going, you know just making small talk. A week later, I had an interview for a job. I got the job and the interviewer told me she remember from the mall in how much I went out my way to ask how the cashier day was going etc. So you never know.

    • @daughterofthemosthighgod1889
      @daughterofthemosthighgod1889 Před 3 lety +2

      @@donnac.3273 🎯🎯

    • @laterramiller4507
      @laterramiller4507 Před 3 lety +1

      @@donnac.3273 yesssss. Congratulations 🎉🎈

  • @thedarkestdawn1
    @thedarkestdawn1 Před 3 lety +220

    She said what she said! Don't sugar coat shit if it ain't supposed to be sweet.

    • @Berth407
      @Berth407 Před 3 lety +3

      Tell it!

    • @LeeLee-cp3rv
      @LeeLee-cp3rv Před 3 lety +3

      But she was really sweet about it though....👀

  • @chrystlaw1
    @chrystlaw1 Před 3 lety +117

    I saw a woman at my son’s school show up for parent teacher conferences with a bonnet, house slippers, cut of jeans and a tank top with no bra. She may have been comfortable as hell but her kid looked embarrassed as hell. 🤦🏻‍♀️

    • @celly9719
      @celly9719 Před 3 lety +3

      Awww nawww

    • @DoubleAA82
      @DoubleAA82 Před 3 lety +3

      yes, cause he know that's house wear ...smh

    • @KeeKeeSoto
      @KeeKeeSoto Před 3 lety +6

      Oh poor baby 😱🤦🏿‍♀️

    • @bluquartz2
      @bluquartz2 Před 3 lety +1

      You don’t know why she had on a bonnet?
      Leave people alone and stop projecting- by child could have been embarrassed for any other reason

    • @cherellepeterson3079
      @cherellepeterson3079 Před 3 lety +3

      @Mzz Moe YES!

  • @klmshadybay12
    @klmshadybay12 Před 3 lety +101

    We’re living in a “i’ll do what i wanna do and nobody better not say anything to me or i’ll beat you up/politically correct dont police me, dispute any logical thoughts, forget the elders” society

    • @Thundercattt
      @Thundercattt Před 3 lety +3

      Agreed, and it’s truly sad.

    • @nikkiw3734
      @nikkiw3734 Před 3 lety

      🎯

    • @tackytoya
      @tackytoya Před 3 lety +7

      They don't respect their elders because their own parents don't respect themselves. The longer we keep our head in the sand, the worse it will get.

    • @EmauniSimone
      @EmauniSimone Před 3 lety +4

      @@tackytoya the black community doesn’t have real elders just older people who have created toxic cycles and generational curses they pass down and refuse to acknowledge or heal from if we being honest. We ain’t had big mamas/ real elders since the 80s and 90s lmao grandma keisha and jasmine have taken over

    • @valthomas9786
      @valthomas9786 Před 3 lety

      Could NOT have said it better Kay!

  • @JM-ip1es
    @JM-ip1es Před 3 lety +424

    It’s scary how many women think wearing a bonnet in public is okay... Damn we are doomed

    • @bluquartz2
      @bluquartz2 Před 3 lety +56

      If that’s what’s dooming us, I’d hate to see your measuring stick

    • @SmithandWessonismyprotection
      @SmithandWessonismyprotection Před 3 lety +25

      It's these young and some old ratchet females

    • @rosegoldbanks4842
      @rosegoldbanks4842 Před 3 lety +27

      @@bluquartz2 you don’t get it smh that’s the problem yes there are deeper issues but the point of it is have dignity if we build that back up then it will take a step in to solving deeper issues, to solve anything you need dignity, pride and class

    • @tyriexs5
      @tyriexs5 Před 3 lety +2

      @@SmithandWessonismyprotection Y'ALL RAISED EM

    • @sjlewis271
      @sjlewis271 Před 3 lety +31

      We're doomed from bonnets and not poverty, high rates of illiteracy, dangerous neighborhoods, and unclean water?! Naw baby. That surface thinking is what will have YOU AND YOURS DOOMED. 🙄

  • @StarringShameka
    @StarringShameka Před 3 lety +382

    I’m apart of the younger generation. I’m only 26 but a lot of things that these women do and how they carry themselves is just tacky. Like you said, loud on the phone, drawing attention to themselves, with the slides, usually pajamas. Loud music playing. Just a mess. It seems like my generation lacks class and common sense. It truly irks me when I see people in public blasting their music. Like where are your headphones?? I can’t defend my generation, we’ve dropped the ball on a lot of basic common sense & courtesy for others

    • @CeCeMe1
      @CeCeMe1 Před 3 lety +24

      I saw a young girl in Nordstroms with a full ass pajama set!!!!!! My second hand embarrassment ran me up outta there. Mind you, it was 3pm in the afternoon.

    • @nessajenean8705
      @nessajenean8705 Před 3 lety +18

      Right literally earphones are $1 if you just need a temporary pair.

    • @StarringShameka
      @StarringShameka Před 3 lety +8

      @@CeCeMe1 how about I saw one at 6pm in a family dollar parking lot with pajama pants & the furry house slippers!!!!!!!!

    • @CeCeMe1
      @CeCeMe1 Před 3 lety +19

      @@StarringShameka oh Lord...so she been sitting up, stanking all day in them PJ's. Eating hot Cheetos and scratching...🙄.

    • @Berth407
      @Berth407 Před 3 lety +2

      Yes Young Queen!

  • @deaonrowlette8509
    @deaonrowlette8509 Před 3 lety +182

    Your ability to firmly, insightfully and articulately critique and expound on various topics while dropping pearls of wisdom is a breath of fresh air ❤️

  • @justdc3517
    @justdc3517 Před 3 lety +81

    Monique didn’t just mention the bonnet. She also said the pajamas, blankets, and slippers. People zoomed in on the bonnet but she was talking about the full package.

  • @mylikamorton5858
    @mylikamorton5858 Před 3 lety +228

    Sir, you just preached a WHOLE word tonight! It’s not so much about the bonnet, it’s the mentality and the mindset behind it. And it’s not just the younger ladies either. I’m grateful that back in the day at my predominantly black high school, we had certain dress code standards when we had ROTC and track field trips. Even while traveling, we couldn’t just look any kind of way. That mindset has stayed with me. If that’s considered respectability politics, oh well. I’m grateful for it!

  • @blane6592
    @blane6592 Před 3 lety +155

    My granddad always said “I bet not catch you outside with your head scarf” IVE NEVER EVER DONE IT!!! It’s TACKY AF!!!

    • @TheeCourageousQueen
      @TheeCourageousQueen Před 3 lety +8

      A head scarf is not a bonnet so granddad needed correction.

    • @iceprincess825
      @iceprincess825 Před 3 lety +1

      I agree 100%

    • @Cream_of_wheat
      @Cream_of_wheat Před 3 lety +1

      My grandparents too

    • @Cream_of_wheat
      @Cream_of_wheat Před 3 lety +9

      @@TheeCourageousQueen welp my grandparents regarded them as the same. It’s a garment meant to be worn about the house, not outdoors.

    • @blane6592
      @blane6592 Před 3 lety +2

      @@TheeCourageousQueen no…if you THINK they’re Different…YOU NEED A CORRECTION AND THEM 7 other simpletons that thumped up this foolish ass comment!

  • @cpear015
    @cpear015 Před 3 lety +284

    My dad always said “dress how you wanna be addressed.” I hear that playback every day before I leave the house haha! I’m probably the only one in my friend group who still irons their clothes! Nothing wrong with taking pride in yourself, but for some odd reason…some people choose not to 🤷🏽‍♂️

    • @jadiraboutisma7704
      @jadiraboutisma7704 Před 3 lety +5

      Agree

    • @redbuddha8373
      @redbuddha8373 Před 3 lety +3

      Respect ✊ to pops

    • @KittyGothXO
      @KittyGothXO Před 3 lety +2

      I still iron and plan to continue.

    • @vivelavidalivelife3617
      @vivelavidalivelife3617 Před 3 lety +6

      I dont want to be addressed while running errands. But ppl still treat me very nice. All my problem where at my jobs where i never had a bonnet or pjs on. Now i work for myself. And i dont iron , hang my clothes up right out the dryer. No wrinkles.

    • @nanadoctrove5590
      @nanadoctrove5590 Před 3 lety

      thats RIGHT

  • @ItsJustmeEB
    @ItsJustmeEB Před 3 lety +225

    “It’s the loud and obnoxious.....cussing in front of old folks....” Yes! That exactly it. The people associated with the bonnet give the bonnet a bad name.

    • @Evelyn-pl3we
      @Evelyn-pl3we Před 3 lety +13

      This! Idk about the bonnets but the obnoxiously loud folks, cursing infront of elders/strangers will NEVER be okay.

    • @tackytoya
      @tackytoya Před 3 lety +7

      YES!! Everything he said is on point. And people that dismiss everything under the guise of respectability politics are actually the one's obsessed with the gaze of others. Like how about you just respect yourself?!!

    • @tiffanyjones5469
      @tiffanyjones5469 Před 3 lety +2

      And I just saw her pitiful azz in Dunkin’ Donuts with her phone on speaker 🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @moniquewest3277
      @moniquewest3277 Před 3 lety +3

      No class, no decorum.

    • @moniquewest3277
      @moniquewest3277 Před 3 lety

      @@Evelyn-pl3we Self absorbed and no concern for anyone outside of their 3-ft bubble.

  • @lakeishasolomon315
    @lakeishasolomon315 Před 3 lety +125

    Monique only said what my grandmother instilled in all of her grand daughters the same with the boys and wave caps ijs

  • @Indiegirl007
    @Indiegirl007 Před 3 lety +418

    There's headscarves and then there's a bonnet. A headscarf can be tied in to a myriad of beautiful ways, and has always been seen as a symbol of style and class. When women of color were not allowed to show their hair, due to our gravity defying hair irritating the jealousy of our oppressors, they tied on Tignons. These Tignons would be absolutely stunning, and these black women would be KNOWN for the gorgeous unique style of their Tignon.
    A bonnet......is not a Tignon.

  • @dr.dermixgirlmd7479
    @dr.dermixgirlmd7479 Před 3 lety +450

    We don’t have to be in couture walking through the airport but can we just at least not be wearing something that belongs in a bathroom or bedroom? Where is the home training?!? DECORUM. Lawd! 🤔🙄

  • @cookiebiscoe3170
    @cookiebiscoe3170 Před 3 lety +214

    My Southern Belle Momma raised me to NEVER go outside the home with rollers, scarves, slippers, etc. She said a “lady” is always done outside the house.

  • @Cocoamama03
    @Cocoamama03 Před 3 lety +270

    I agree with what she said. For me the issue is we have gotten away from being able to be corrected by our elders and can't take constructive criticism. The village can't hold us accountable any longer without ppl getting in their feelings. We see how the village not being able to talk to us has caused our village to be in shambles right now. So it is bigger than the bonnet.

  • @sampa2nyc
    @sampa2nyc Před 3 lety +137

    Ms. Shirleen said, "If you got a bonnet on you ain't wash your tail, I believe that." "You got on house shoes and a bonnet? You ain't wash your tail." LOL

    • @anitabrown9344
      @anitabrown9344 Před 3 lety +6

      That’s exactly what Ms. Shirleen said 😂

    • @lindsayblair5181
      @lindsayblair5181 Před 3 lety +3

      I'm with that thought 🤣

    • @nayakiabates8814
      @nayakiabates8814 Před 3 lety +7

      Exactly, I don’t think anyone takes a good bath groom themselves all up and then put a bonnet and pjs on 😂😂 just don’t believe it!!!

    • @Bee-pg1fv
      @Bee-pg1fv Před 3 lety +2

      Who is Ms Shirleen?

    • @areyoublind2502
      @areyoublind2502 Před 3 lety +1

      😆😆😆

  • @ainetmonroe
    @ainetmonroe Před 3 lety +199

    Monique is right. But let’s be honest, we will never be able to get all black people to agree on something.

    • @DoubleAA82
      @DoubleAA82 Před 3 lety +2

      this!!

    • @rydapin
      @rydapin Před 3 lety +8

      Thats all people.

    • @donyelledaily
      @donyelledaily Před 3 lety +5

      Which is why we are where we are now in the world. No progression will be made until we get one 1page. They’ve divided us and they’ve conquered

    • @mwright0428
      @mwright0428 Před 3 lety +4

      EVER! I say the way to help the black community is to not be part of the problem. Unfortunately there is a very loud minority of people that insist on disagreeing with everything. But most rational people understand Mo’s viewpoint and don’t take offense to it.

    • @ainetmonroe
      @ainetmonroe Před 3 lety

      @@rydapin true but i really wish our people could get on one accord with just a few simple things.

  • @ewilliams9981
    @ewilliams9981 Před 3 lety +123

    My mother raised me to be a lady always and I'm raising my daughter the same. She tries it...but I don't allow it. You never know what type of opportunities you get passed up for because of your presentation. She already has two strikes against her in this world as a black woman. No way in hell imma let her set herself up for failure by wearing a bonnet in public.

    • @vivelavidalivelife3617
      @vivelavidalivelife3617 Před 3 lety +3

      @NotSoTypikal lazy about doing what. No one has to have an excuse for you to wear whatever they pay for. Its not a crime to wear a bonnet in public nor is it a action that will get them fired at work or hired in the first place. If im taking care of my business and not dependent then what extra work is needed.

    • @Fans-am-i-inferto
      @Fans-am-i-inferto Před 3 lety +5

      @Crystal Barker While I understand where you’re coming from, and agree that people can wear what they want and don’t have to explain sh*t to anybody, but I disagree with the job part... If you come in to do a shift at your job, let alone the interview to GET the job, wearing a fkn bonnet? Then yeah you look lazy as’f and it can most DEFINITELY play a part in your hiring or dismissal. A lace front or a shake n go takes less than 2 mins to get together. The reality of it is some of these people are really just that lazy and are just mad that someone said something about it. Sorry not sorry ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    • @vivelavidalivelife3617
      @vivelavidalivelife3617 Před 3 lety +2

      @@Fans-am-i-inferto i never said to wear a bonnet work job or and interview. Im talking about running errands.

  • @abriaangel9986
    @abriaangel9986 Před 3 lety +83

    It amazes me that people are really fighting for the right to be raggedy in public.

  • @honeybee8929
    @honeybee8929 Před 3 lety +75

    Exactly
    Monique didn’t say anything wrong
    We don’t just represent ourselves
    We represent our families and our race

  • @shelceyhampton5253
    @shelceyhampton5253 Před 3 lety +54

    One of my best friends recently made a FB post about hearing her late mother's voice say "dont leave this house lookin like who shot john" and we had a good laugh about how our moms had a standard for how they presented themselves and I'm thankful for it

  • @robynviney1228
    @robynviney1228 Před 3 lety +238

    I noticed with this generation that a lot of the young ladies are wearing the bonnets more than u see their hairstyles

    • @la_southernbellebroughton7513
      @la_southernbellebroughton7513 Před 3 lety +23

      Preach! A lot of people don’t want correction, it’s a time and a place for everything.

    • @ericathetaurus3913
      @ericathetaurus3913 Před 3 lety +26

      They lazy and nasty. Period.

    • @wanda01141
      @wanda01141 Před 3 lety +4

      And more weaves instead of seeing real hair too

    • @MrsAriEllow
      @MrsAriEllow Před 3 lety +4

      Everyone in this section is speaking nothing but facts. 🙌🏾

    • @sunshineleslie1460
      @sunshineleslie1460 Před 3 lety +11

      🤔 don't forget the earlier generation wore hair rollers outdoors as well (dropping and picking up kids from school)

  • @cous516
    @cous516 Před 3 lety +267

    When Big Mama was living certain things just were NOT allowed! You were to be clean, neat and respectable in every way outside of your home.

    • @angelicjames
      @angelicjames Před 3 lety +2

      Exactly!

    • @tyriexs5
      @tyriexs5 Před 3 lety +13

      Bc slavery taught big mama her looks MATTERED more than her bank account

    • @craigharris4792
      @craigharris4792 Před 3 lety +6

      That 👏 Part 👏!!!!!! My grandma always told me you need to look like where you going!

    • @PositiveRaina
      @PositiveRaina Před 3 lety +5

      @@tyriexs5 You trying it!

    • @sjlewis271
      @sjlewis271 Před 3 lety +14

      Big Mama allowed cheating, domestic violence, ignoring mental illness, gambling in her home, teen pregnancy, and dropping out of school to "raise a family" as well. Let me know when y'all will be bringing that back. I'll gladly become a Kardashian that day. A lil blque sometimes. 😒

  • @latececo09
    @latececo09 Před 3 lety +126

    This happened during the “ No fuck given era” when everyone was becoming so comfortable, we forgot to “give fucks” about how we represent ourselves rather than what people think of us in general. Love your videos Q. Wish you even more success than you have. 🥰

  • @latoyajones8463
    @latoyajones8463 Před 3 lety +99

    This is my take: A Bonnet is meant for the house. There is nothing classy or elegant about wearing it outside. Periodt. I wouldn’t be caught going to the mailbox with a bonnet on. When I see folks out with bonnets, it says a lot about how they feel about themselves. Let’s elevate our thinking and life! I endorse Monique’s message.

  • @mrlustud3d
    @mrlustud3d Před 3 lety +238

    "Monique in my opinion," didn't drop the ball. However, the parents have dropped the ball. They haven't holistically, put nun in their offspring(s), to exemplify class of any sort.

    • @Deon-sd2jr
      @Deon-sd2jr Před 3 lety +10

      Exactly... I think she did a good job presenting her case and it needed to be said , she should speak on the adult ms wearing their PJ’s to the store and every where else

    • @InMyCruisingEra
      @InMyCruisingEra Před 3 lety +9

      It does start in the home indeed

    • @DaFinestDuchess
      @DaFinestDuchess Před 3 lety

      Class is made up by white people.

    • @mrlustud3d
      @mrlustud3d Před 3 lety +6

      @@DaFinestDuchess The word "class," was translated by caucasian, at in Oxford English Dictionary. That time period was around 1891.
      However the word of "classy," came from the Hebrew word, "ˈklasē!" That derived from the ancient cultures of Africa, when it was was called Hu-Ka-Ptah(kemet).
      Do yourself a favor and learn more about your history. We are mostly powerless, cuz many of our ppl don't know anything about the great "Great" African kings and Queens, who ran it all. Caucasian came on the scene long after the earth started, and they genetics are considered as a "genetic mutation!"

    • @gloriagrace2555
      @gloriagrace2555 Před 3 lety +1

      Exactly

  • @lapvegeta
    @lapvegeta Před 3 lety +57

    We gotta keep it 100. Conversations like this are important and REAL.

  • @angelicjames
    @angelicjames Před 3 lety +70

    We can’t even go to my family’s house for Christmas, Thanksgiving or other holiday gatherings, in casual attire 😭😭 But i understand, we were raised to be presentable 95% of the time.

  • @msnikinell5818
    @msnikinell5818 Před 3 lety +102

    We had structure and decorum in the 70's, 80's and early 90's.
    Decorum: "behavior in keeping with good taste and propriety."

    • @rubysbaby822
      @rubysbaby822 Před 3 lety +3

      That’s a lie. It was head scarves or rollers before. They talked about that too. There was always something. Meanwhile our men been sagging pants for decades and we just act like that’s ok.

    • @veemiller8525
      @veemiller8525 Před 3 lety +1

      There was definitely structure and boundaries back then. We live in a world where anything goes....no rules, no pride, no expectations, no standards. It's sad. This is not a generalization. This statement does not represent all black folks of course. But far too many of us have fallen victim to trends, no matter how dumb.

    • @cjjones6264
      @cjjones6264 Před 3 lety

      @@rubysbaby822 yup. agreed. thanks for saying that. I come from way back in the 60's, and unless I slept through those 30 year's, the 70's, 80's, 90's. I aine see all that! Ya know.... there's some people out there who will even go so far back as to tell you that Black People were better, and at our best when we were Slaves! #RealTalk! Like... wth! That #CounterfeitNostalgia. I aint gone lie: some of this idea is true, that we become more morally bankrupt as a people, with each new generation - BUT IT AINT A BLACK THING! It's a social thing! it's an **Evolution of the Human Race** thing! So our people need to stop telling ourselves that we are The Immoral Beasts of Society! geeze! Except, maybe for a few minor subtleties, we are no worse than any other group of people!

  • @Evelyn-pl3we
    @Evelyn-pl3we Před 3 lety +9

    I'm 26 and I COMPLETELY agree. A lot of people in my generation are obnoxiously loud and have no respect for anyone else. This isn't about respectability politics, this is about common decency that transcends all cultures and people's.

  • @syllocs
    @syllocs Před 3 lety +82

    It’s a bonnet you sleep in to protect your hair call it what it is......A Damn Sleep Cap To Protect Your Hair!

  • @aliyah7148
    @aliyah7148 Před 3 lety +86

    My grandmother didn’t play about wearing bonnets or scarves (unless the scarf looked nice); and no wearing pajamas and robes etc

  • @MrsButtersworth82
    @MrsButtersworth82 Před 3 lety +64

    Monique saying something I’ve said years ago. I don’t lose sleep over this but I hate seeing folks with bonnets on in public.

  • @keshastanford8413
    @keshastanford8413 Před 3 lety +122

    I'm Sorry. I like to be comfortable on my day off or running errands or when I fly as well. However, It is NOTHING CUTE about wearing your pajama bottoms, a Bonnet, DU Rag or house shoes out in public. If you want to be comfortable or if your just running to the store/ errands out put on a baseball hat, scarf ( there are Many different styles), turban, headband, wig, leggings, jogging pants hammer pants, lounge/ palates pants jeggings/ jeans, skirt etc.... Too many options besides looking like you rolled out the damn bed and went outside. Come on now. This is exactly why " THEY" talk about 'US" calling us Ghetto and thinking we aren't unemployable. Have some decorum about yourself. Look at our history. In the 50's, 60's, 70's they wore suits and dress Everyday. WHAT HAPPENDEN to THAT????

    • @vivelavidalivelife3617
      @vivelavidalivelife3617 Před 3 lety +7

      They were talking about us un the 50's, 60's, and 70's. They are going to for ever not except us.

    • @KP82457
      @KP82457 Před 3 lety +14

      @@vivelavidalivelife3617 Y'all got it twisted.Being dignified and self respecting people has nothing to do with trying to impress white people.

    • @vivelavidalivelife3617
      @vivelavidalivelife3617 Před 3 lety +4

      @@KP82457 it does when the arguement is that we have to act a certain way to combat stereotypes or when u tell a grown woman/ man how to show that they respect themselves. What standards are we using. Who said that a bonnet is only for the bed. Y dont u feel that ur hair doesn't need protection outside with that same practical purposes that a bonnet can provide. Farther more y are we fighting to act shallow. Certain for Clothing is shallow. Are u aware of the many ways to show that a person is worthy of respect. The way u dress is not one of them. Which is my point i have no other point in this debate.

  • @Theenrichmentlab
    @Theenrichmentlab Před 3 lety +223

    Honestly, we should encourage our daughters to look and be their best at all times. It's how you present yourself to the world. There could be a fated meeting that could change your life that day. 🙏🏽

    • @Jay_490
      @Jay_490 Před 3 lety +8

      it affects how you feel about yourself as well! Its a mental health boost and overall confidence boost

    • @bladeowens
      @bladeowens Před 3 lety +5

      Totally agree! I always have my face beat and dressed to the 9 when I travel!!! But I’m also in my 50’s. I do wear very fashionable African head wraps when running errands.However, I do dress it up with a nice shirt.

    • @JohnSmith-xg9wx
      @JohnSmith-xg9wx Před 3 lety +3

      Daughters AND sons.

    • @PHOENIX980567
      @PHOENIX980567 Před 3 lety +3

      @@bladeowens Yes. A fashionable head wrap is not the same as a bonnet. They wear that on runways

    • @Theenrichmentlab
      @Theenrichmentlab Před 3 lety +2

      @@bladeowens 💃🏽😊

  • @soulchild61
    @soulchild61 Před 3 lety +229

    But Q, Monique was in her home, and she wasn’t “checking “ in a negative way, Mo said what needed to be said

    • @EmpressNic
      @EmpressNic Před 3 lety +12

      Thank you. I don't see why folks are saying she was inappropriate.

    • @plt4life629
      @plt4life629 Před 3 lety +3

      Thank
      You!! I soo agree with her whole statement!!

    • @Monique319__
      @Monique319__ Před 3 lety +6

      She made a video for the public, so just like we have to look presentable in a zoom meeting she should have done the same. What's ironic is more people have seen her braless in this robe, than would have ever seen those women in the airport...

    • @Cosmoshairco
      @Cosmoshairco Před 3 lety +2

      @@Monique319__ 👌

  • @adelaidet4218
    @adelaidet4218 Před 3 lety +210

    I’m part of the younger generation however I have always associated bonnets as something only used for sleep and if worn outside the house it was ghetto to me also bc girls who did that always had the additional attributes that Dineva touched on, it wasn’t just about the bonnet. Me personally I was raised to step out into the world looking presentable and first impressions matter. Now have I stepped out my house in sweats and just looking a mess yes but it’s always still looked presentable one way or another. Another thing with this generation that annoys me is that they’ve completely let go of guidance and have this whole “I do what I want” attitude even when they’re completely in the wrong. This all about me attitude lacks common decency and common sense. Let me not go on a rant bc there I go sounding like an old head and complaining about my generation 😂 but I completely agree that bonnets, house slippers, etc. Should only be worn at your yard, period.

    • @SimplyaLady92
      @SimplyaLady92 Před 3 lety +5

      My generation was like this too hun, we just grew up 😘 good luck

    • @besmithj167
      @besmithj167 Před 3 lety +7

      I see no lies here🤷🏾‍♀️🚶🏾‍♀️

    • @zanobiizanobia
      @zanobiizanobia Před 3 lety +7

      Very well said 👏🏼👏🏼 representation is everything especially for our culture. Lord knows they already have their stereotypes about us

    • @Jazzde
      @Jazzde Před 3 lety +2

      It's not like the past generations had guidance either and once you are an adult you get to make your own decisions. That is the very same concept that led to change. Today's generation isn't doing anything different than the past generations.

    • @SimplyaLady92
      @SimplyaLady92 Před 3 lety

      @@Jazzde 👏

  • @McLovin0788
    @McLovin0788 Před 3 lety +60

    I remember my Na Na (great grandmother) would get dressed even if we didn’t have anywhere to go..

  • @sljcsu
    @sljcsu Před 3 lety +38

    Coming out the house with a bonnet, pajamas and house shoes on, tells me you didn't wash up!

  • @t.walker8641
    @t.walker8641 Před 3 lety +51

    Monique made sense to me. I was taught, and passed on to my children, never leave the house without looking presentable, meaning hair done, clothes clean, and smelling good

  • @ashalb7857
    @ashalb7857 Před 3 lety +114

    I might run into rich man in these streets!! I heard if you stay ready you ain’t gotta get ready 🤣

    • @ladycapricornia
      @ladycapricornia Před 3 lety

      Amen😂😂

    • @moonlite1752
      @moonlite1752 Před 3 lety +1

      And what if she pulls a rich man in a bonnet while only dusties approach you. I know you’re joking, so No attack on you, sis. Lol No I don’t support the public bonnet wearing. Just saying, it may help to check your mindset.❤️

    • @jadeehm
      @jadeehm Před 3 lety +2

      @@moonlite1752 😳 It’s her mindset that needs checking??? Okay🙄

    • @sydneyjackson9037
      @sydneyjackson9037 Před 3 lety

      Say that shit! You are so right lol

    • @daughterofthemosthighgod1889
      @daughterofthemosthighgod1889 Před 3 lety

      That part 😂😂

  • @neenee12201
    @neenee12201 Před 3 lety +40

    I wish I could like this 1000 times! You said a word! No one can tell this young people anything. Just wild and reckless with no respect. It’s sad!

  • @lemonlover9164
    @lemonlover9164 Před 3 lety +197

    This whole bonnet situation is no different from the sagging pants situation. We as BF need to do better. Peridot!

    • @kawaiipotatolewis9507
      @kawaiipotatolewis9507 Před 3 lety +4

      Nah I can’t think of no good reason for saggy pants, that’s just disgusting (to me). However, I could understand if someone had to wear their bonnet outside.

    • @lemonlover9164
      @lemonlover9164 Před 3 lety +1

      @@kawaiipotatolewis9507 - Oh I agree with you. What I’m saying is this.... people who sag swear by they style and sagging is still popular. Regardless if we agree or not, the conversation was needed. Hopefully some women will be more conscious about wearing them in public as much. It was just crazy to me how people attacked Monique because she was coming from a loving place. Ijs

    • @kawaiipotatolewis9507
      @kawaiipotatolewis9507 Před 3 lety +1

      @@lemonlover9164 gotcha!

    • @neknek4121
      @neknek4121 Před 3 lety +2

      I think the bonnet is fine depending on where you are example the airport should be fine because you will probably be sleep at some point but I see ppl at doctor appointments and court houses I don’t agree with those type of places but to each its on

    • @lemonlover9164
      @lemonlover9164 Před 3 lety

      @@kawaiipotatolewis9507 - we may not find a good reason to wear sagging pants but the ones wearing them feel strongly about their style and can care less what we think or say, Ijs Im just glad Monique addressed the situation and hopefully it will touch some women nerves and they’ll do better when it comes to certain places

  • @kitas.8759
    @kitas.8759 Před 3 lety +39

    When growing up my mom told me I was a representation of her & I needed to be put together when leaving the house. I keep myself groomed nails, hair, brows, toes, etc. Also, I keep comfy clothes on hand if I need to run out in a hurry. My mom told me to stay ready & you'll never have to get ready. I even keep lip gloss I'm my car....perfume too

  • @miamigirlredd9885
    @miamigirlredd9885 Před 3 lety +142

    The most intelligent, thorough, well-rounded and honest response, I've heard. 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

    • @entrepriseenfondcommun2024
      @entrepriseenfondcommun2024 Před 3 lety +3

      Yes👏 Come on brain🔥

    • @QueenTitiLoves
      @QueenTitiLoves Před 3 lety +2

      Its the absolute truth! Our young girls need some granny's. My nonprofit will be doing some class training events!

  • @robinmajor6798
    @robinmajor6798 Před 3 lety +78

    I really appreciate your commentary on this issue. Honestly I’m saddened to see young women not presenting themselves in a classy manner. I often wonder how this happened?? I have a 30 year old daughter in raising her, I stressed the importance of being a lady and having class.

    • @livefree1111
      @livefree1111 Před 3 lety +4

      You have a 30 year old? You look great sis.

    • @maurice1263
      @maurice1263 Před 3 lety

      Look sometimes people just want to have lazy days and not do much. Each to their own I suppose

    • @kenya9549
      @kenya9549 Před 3 lety +1

      @@livefree1111 Same thing I said. Beautiful indeed.

  • @candaciey2674
    @candaciey2674 Před 3 lety +49

    When I see it out in public, I give a slight eyebrow raise but then I do a shoulder shrug and keep minding my business🤷

    • @AprilDawnInc
      @AprilDawnInc Před 3 lety +2

      Exactly... And, that's what we all need to do these days.

    • @tonielizabeth4828
      @tonielizabeth4828 Před 3 lety +2

      THANK YOU

    • @jazzsayin8435
      @jazzsayin8435 Před 3 lety

      I work at Walmart and i have seen grown women and even grown men come dressed in flannel or fleece onesie. But that's not unusual, I've seen much worse. Walmart brings in all types of clients into "fashion"

  • @SimplyaLady92
    @SimplyaLady92 Před 3 lety +290

    If we're going to be a community then we have to police each other. These talks are necessary.

    • @Rio_Monique
      @Rio_Monique Před 3 lety +32

      What if people don't want to be policed? We have enough police lol. For me, if you don't have a heaven or hell to me put in or are not my late mother or grandmother, keep the policing to yourself.

    • @SimplyaLady92
      @SimplyaLady92 Před 3 lety +24

      @@Rio_Monique communities have rules and standards. Sometimes you have to just fall in line, every battle doesn't have to be fought

    • @Rio_Monique
      @Rio_Monique Před 3 lety +27

      @@SimplyaLady92 In my opinion, one of those battles that don't have to fought is people's hair and dress choices (unless they're at work of course). People should get to present themselves to the world in the way that they choose. Can people have an opinion about what a person wears, sure but it should stop there. You get this life and then you die. Spend it looking how you want. Not for people that don't cut you check or they're not God.

    • @SimplyaLady92
      @SimplyaLady92 Před 3 lety +8

      @@Rio_Monique ok, rebel 👌

    • @Rio_Monique
      @Rio_Monique Před 3 lety +17

      @@SimplyaLady92 Just engaging in friendly conversation but I caught your sarcasm. Have a good day ma'am. 👍🏾

  • @shehound1778
    @shehound1778 Před 3 lety +60

    The bottom line ...Presentation is everything..💯!!

  • @ladiescorpion5029
    @ladiescorpion5029 Před 3 lety +77

    Me personally, I wouldn’t wear a bonnet in public BUT when I see other people wearing them; I just mind my business because it’s not me

    • @Cocktailsandnails
      @Cocktailsandnails Před 3 lety +4

      What's the purpose of doing our hair to have a bonnet on all day....or you can't even do a ponytail...like come on

    • @nataliet.3023
      @nataliet.3023 Před 3 lety +6

      I totally agree with you. While I would never go out in one myself. I dont judge or pay mind to people that do. Because I understand that life happens and idk what one has going on in their personal life. I'm going to extend kindness and grace regardless.

    • @dollface9639
      @dollface9639 Před 3 lety +6

      The world would be a better place if people would mind their damn business and keep it moving.

    • @moniquewest3277
      @moniquewest3277 Před 3 lety +1

      @@dollface9639 And I'm fine with that, if it's not rooted in self-centeredness. If you are minding your own damn business because it has no impact on you, then you have other problems for sure.

    • @dollface9639
      @dollface9639 Před 3 lety +3

      @@moniquewest3277 if a person wearing a bonnet has a personal impact on you then you have other problems for sure.

  • @beemocha
    @beemocha Před 3 lety +231

    “Don’t blame it on no perm ya momma gave u when u was 11” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
    I agree w/ Mo’Nique 100%. Also,she was coming from a lovin place when she said it. It really is ghetto 2 wear a bonnet out in public 😖

    • @euniquewatson3577
      @euniquewatson3577 Před 3 lety +6

      Thank you sis.. Tell them again. I'm tired of them trying to drag her for the truth!

    • @mariahwhitneycelinejanetmadona
      @mariahwhitneycelinejanetmadona Před 3 lety

      Bev, is this true tho? I've heard women say that something happened to their hair as a kid and it never grew back right

    • @letrice2892
      @letrice2892 Před 3 lety +6

      @@mariahwhitneycelinejanetmadona that's not true at all I have hair issues myself and wear wigs and when I dont feel like putting on a wig to run a quick errand I will wear a scarf underneath a baseball cap in a ny minute women wearing the bonnet outside is simply being lazy and not having an ounce of concern as to how you're presented to the world smh

    • @mariahwhitneycelinejanetmadona
      @mariahwhitneycelinejanetmadona Před 3 lety +1

      @@letrice2892 i was asking about the veracity of the “I had a perm at 7 and my hair never grew back even tho I’m in my 20’s” stories

    • @toni9890
      @toni9890 Před 3 lety +1

      It’s not ghetto, if your bonnet is clean then there’s no problem with wearing it in public especially to run errands? Y’all call anything black women do ghetto

  • @tameishaewilliams7314
    @tameishaewilliams7314 Před 3 lety +109

    Nobody should be in public wearing pajamas and bonnets ‼️ Period ‼️

  • @bellzzzzz
    @bellzzzzz Před 3 lety +266

    I agree with her. There’s a time & place for everything.

    • @dbajanredhead
      @dbajanredhead Před 3 lety +23

      Absolutely. It's not a hat and it's ghetto af.

    • @mzlo2057
      @mzlo2057 Před 3 lety +17

      She is so right.Pajamas.bonnets and slippers out in the street.Sistas get your self together.

    • @mzlo2057
      @mzlo2057 Před 3 lety +13

      And the same slippers you wear in the house your out in the street with them on.Pjs you wear to bed your strolling around in the supermarket with them on.its so low life .

    • @brandygee9954
      @brandygee9954 Před 3 lety +1

      @@mzlo2057 That's so nasty.

    • @wave_Dee
      @wave_Dee Před 3 lety +5

      I agree with her also. It's not appealing, I don't care how tired I am or how hard life get, I would never be caught outside with a bonnet. I don't wear them period, but I do own a couple

  • @teebee4000
    @teebee4000 Před 3 lety +37

    When Ghetto culture goes 'mainstream', this is what we get. But as soooon as Leslie Jones plays a 'broad with a bonnet' on Saturday Night Live, the same black women will be ready to cancel her...such hypocrisy.

  • @quaniquaepps-brown6003
    @quaniquaepps-brown6003 Před 3 lety +110

    Monique was keeping it 💯💯 we have become to comfortable with ratchet culture

  • @truthseekerForever
    @truthseekerForever Před 3 lety +213

    She was on point! Take off those damn bonnets!

  • @firstname8348
    @firstname8348 Před 3 lety +135

    I agree with Monique. I don't believe in leaving the house looking like I just woke up.

  • @Deresco1
    @Deresco1 Před 3 lety +20

    “Bald headed to the damn root”
    I can’t take much more of these Blossom openings 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @MsRiceTravels
    @MsRiceTravels Před 3 lety +23

    You explained it exactly how I feel. It's not about the bonnet, it's the attitude and the way you carry yourself with it on.

    • @Brandi_.
      @Brandi_. Před 3 lety +2

      Exactly. It’s not the bonnet it is the behavior and the mentality.

  • @waterseveon1
    @waterseveon1 Před 3 lety +52

    My children thank me for raising them old school! They look at theses kids in their era and say it sad!!

  • @greenbyrd3665
    @greenbyrd3665 Před 3 lety +135

    "It's not just the bonnet." It's the bonnet lifestyle! lol

  • @SashaBoo429
    @SashaBoo429 Před 3 lety +13

    A woman with any kind of polish about her wouldn't be caught dead with a bonnet or sleep attire on outside. Period.

  • @allthingzblack9306
    @allthingzblack9306 Před 3 lety +102

    I personally think that bonnets, scarfs, robes, pajamas, house shoes ect are for the house.

  • @MsClassyDiva
    @MsClassyDiva Před 3 lety +52

    It is a sad day when women rather take verbal abuse from a KEVIN SAMUELS and disregard what an older woman is saying. No matter how she presented the message, there was still an IMPORTANT message. I also agree with Dineva; its not just the bonnet.

    • @danielleporter8106
      @danielleporter8106 Před 3 lety +3

      SO TRUE

    • @kdotty1543
      @kdotty1543 Před 3 lety +5

      I JUST SAID THIS SHIT SISSSSS....NO LIE...OUR WOMEN ARE WRONG AND THEY DONT WANT TO TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY. THEY HAVE BOUGHT THE WHITE MANS DELUSION AND ITS SAD...

    • @MsClassyDiva
      @MsClassyDiva Před 3 lety +1

      @@kdotty1543 indeed!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

    • @Jenna1394
      @Jenna1394 Před 3 lety +1

      And that's the issue, they don't want to listen to black women that actually care about them, but rather black men that berate them.

  • @jonrichdoe84
    @jonrichdoe84 Před 3 lety +45

    The articulation of this post was EVERYTHING!!!!! Good job Q

  • @theycallmestoosh
    @theycallmestoosh Před 3 lety +27

    Dress how you want to be addressed. I strive for respect, dignity & class therefore bonnets/slippers etc is a hard NO.

  • @adriannathompson2399
    @adriannathompson2399 Před 3 lety +116

    The bonnet is equivalent to wearing the plastic shower cap back in the day for Jheri curl out on the street

  • @MotherDivable
    @MotherDivable Před 3 lety +43

    You just disclosed where the breakdown started. I remember when we were wearing wraps and wrap scarfs with a hat ON TOP OF THE WRAP SCARF.
    Bonnets are for in the house, just like pajamas and house shoes.

  • @only1adrienne
    @only1adrienne Před 3 lety +98

    I agree with Monique. Time and place. You’re right, it’s not about Black and White respectability policies or being concerned about the White gaze. There are social and cultural norms regarding what we wear in certain settings. You don’t wear sweatpants to a wedding. You don’t wear a bikini to a funeral. You don’t wear a bathrobe to a movie. They could put on a scarf with a baseball cap or satin-lined hat and protect their hair while being presentable and fashionable. It’s not about the textile or the material it’s about the usage. A bonnet’s purpose is for protecting your hair while you sleep, it’s not for wearing it outside the house or traveling.

  • @janicesanders9981
    @janicesanders9981 Před 3 lety +11

    Not just the bonnets but also the clothes, the loud respectful language and music, the profanity. I'm praying for our young people so hard. Monique said it as best she could and she was not lying by a longshot.

  • @tanishacrosson7041
    @tanishacrosson7041 Před 3 lety +20

    I agree with Mo 100%! She didn't say anything different than what the elders in my family would say.