Why The Narcissist Came Into Your Life
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- čas přidán 13. 09. 2022
- There is an important fact we must accept - we can't control pathological, toxic, and abusive people, who they are and what they do.
Yet, in my heart of hearts I know that when you learn the deeper truths about abuse and painful relationships and how to heal for real from them you CAN break free. You CAN live a new reality that bears no resemblance to the life you once lived even before abuse.
In my most recent Thriver TV episode you will see the truth of why the narcissist came into your life. And I’ll explain how to shift your life completely so you're no longer vibrating at that lower, painful, traumatized frequency, and then you're going to be better than free … then you can start Thriving. Watch now!
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John Bradshaw stated in his book: "Healing the Shame that Binds You" - "You have to leave home and do the healing work. Face, Feel and Grieve the pain of the loss of love you didn't receive from your caretakers/parents as a child." Accept that they didn't love you, for whatever reason?
Stop the Repetition Compulsion - The Dance of trying to remedy that lack of love through people that replicate the unavailable, abusive or absent people from your childhood. We must come out of Denial and Face the Truth of what really happened to us. The Truth will set you free.
I know why. I was a source beacon, having grown up with a narc mother, sister and brother. Dad was the enabler and I learned from him. I then attracted a narc husband and his mother....Once I learned this a few years ago, it really was a revelation. My emancipation :-) The relief of knowing it was never about me.
I've come to be grateful for the 20 years I've had to deal with it, because without the hell I wouldn't have grown like I have.
11 years i lost everything i had a beautiful life and this relationship changed me as a person this Evil thing blood sucker nearly took my life he nearly took me away from my babies 😞 i now see the light even tho I did but wasn't strong enough to deal with IT i see and felt it for years now hes blocked 🚫 my silence will heal me x 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙌🙌🙌
They should be prosecutable. Narcissism should be a crime that gets life in jail. They take so many lives.
Power to you for blocking 🚫 don't open any doors ever again. They are monsters. !!!
Been there too. I feel for you, pray for you, and am so proud of you for blocking him! I know how hard it is even if no one understands. I’m a 15 year survivor. I will never know what my life could have been, but I am grateful it is finally over.
Self-care & self-focus have helped me heal.
It has been a personal growth healing process bringing me closer to peace all the time.
I am not concerned with the narcissist, I am devoted to myself.
It has taken 6 yrs.
This makes so much sense to me because everything is energy. I’ve noticed that I’m attracting kind, authentic and genuine people. ❤ Thank you!
For me narcissist try to keep you from healing, then you have more to heal from. Then you have to heal in a way that's entirely different from anything else. Then it's still more difficult to heal form narcs because of the way narcs screw your energy up beyond any baseline you've ever had. ☺
When you say the narc is mirroring the empath/HSP, I think I would call it a black mirror.
God, I needed to hear this today, I've hit a low patch and have been feeling ignored, invisible and depressed .
I just happened to find this video and you've described my entire life story, yet given me hope again.
There is indeed no such thing as coincidence...
Thank you so much Melanie 🙏❤️
Lows suck, in one too..hope you come out soon.
@@JohnSmith-wo7ns Thank you. You too! x
Spot on Melody!!! I know that I share in the toxic attraction! My childhood was about being treated like I was invisible and a coach who abused and devalued me a lot, leaving me confused and emotionless. Felt like I had to take the abuse from authority, so never set any boundaries or had a clue about doing it! I was a vulnerable codependent as an adult for sure and a sure attraction to any narcissist! Many narcs at work and in my family also dishing out abuse. I prob need years of counseling but can’t afford it in retirement. I take relationships with huge caution and I am very independent and unsure about my future with people! I won’t get hurt again by a narcissist that’s for sure! The rest is in work…
Glad you tell it like it really is as many are being FED that the only problem is the narcissist and that’s untrue! We are all messed up on both sides! My emotional sensitivity prob kept me from being a narcissist myself from my devalued abandoned childhood. I am quiet and introspective in general.
Spot on correct! Thank you for sharing this "next level" info that is truly a key to freedom should one quiet their Egoic chatter and receive the wisdom available!! 😊🕊️💜
A few months ago i came to conclusion i was given my dreadful covert nArc relationship last year so i would learn about their behavior -so i could better manage my expectations and disappointments i feel from the mistreatment i get from my adult covert nArc daughter - who i can’t go “no contact “ with, as she has specific real (and many manipulatively exaggerated ) needs. So this video really hits home. Thanks!
I love you Melanie ❣️ Thank you from the bottom of my heart
Well, I have also experiences extreme spiritual warfare at the moment I had done most of my healing. Actually, that was the moment the attacks done by people around me were at its worst.
How would you bring spiritual warfare into this mix?
Also, I think that these people will be drawn to our aura regardless, but I think that the more you have healed, the better you deal with them. Perhaps their behavior doesn't bother you anymore that much or perhaps they fall away due to strong boundaries. I have really seen that higher levels means higher devils and that makes sense because to turn back to unconditional love we must learn to love our enemies and that will not happen if you keep pushing everybody away from you. Imo its more so a matter of becoming so shielded by selflove and selfworth that their digs do not hurt you anymore and that you can approach the situation with compassion.
Lessons learned!!! No more narcissist!
The last 25 years and the 13 year marriage before this was is ENOUGH!
I thought the second one was my gift from God. More like a gift from hell.
Devalued me to the point of almost dying from leukemia.
Turned my children against me.
That in turn took my grandchildren away from me. I haven't seen my oldest grandchild in over 3 years.
And he destroyed my family.
Ty for sharing. This is almost identical to my life too. Xxxx
@@veronicabrannigan6594
I'd say it's time for a change for the better!!😀
“Better than free”. “Spin the blame on everything and everybody else”. Which modules should we focus on to be healed and delivered of the constant slander, defamation, twisting of my words to cause discord, etc?
I did released the pain from my exboyfriend by using brain spotting, emdr, and inner family systems therapy...all at once. I recognized it was a mother wound. I feel so much better.
Melanie Thank you 🌷
Thank you soooo much. Truth 🙏
You're right; I'll admit, I was a bit "triggered" at first by your words. And it's true, I was treated as 'invisible' by both of my parents. Unfortunately though, I see now that I in turn treated my own (now 'adult children') as if they were invisible too when & while they were young & growing up. You make so much sense wrt "so within, so without"; I took NARP back in June 2020 & I think I am a "slow learner" but I remember getting positive results & lots of relief right away (it WAS a lot of hard work & I gave it my "all"). I sort of "slacked off" for awhile in the last year. However, as time passes & I continue to use the tools & processes that I've learned through NARP (I took the Gold Program) as well as watching new thriver videos when you put them out, I'm starting to understand a whole lot more... Thank you so much though for "re-stating" what I just can't (or haven't been & haven't seemed to be able to "understand" before); I now 'get' that the narcissist was truly some sort of a "catalyst" put in my life in order to present to me the 'opportunity' for me to change my own inner programming. And through the beneficial teachings I've learned in NARP, I know now (thanks to you & NARP, Melanie); that I have the strength, desire, courage & tools to walk on into my future life. I now can "accept" that the narcissist(s) in my life were (& 'are' put there 'FOR' me; in order that I can "grow" past them or around them, into a much "better" life. In the past, I was headed for such a 'lost' & uncertain future. I'm so grateful for all of the healing I've experienced & continue to experience. I really am beginning to now feel freedom from the chains of my past. Love to you Melanie & to all of your staff,
Laurel Marshall
Narcissist survivor freedom 🙏 I struggle to forgive the narcissist devil demon monster abuser wearing a mask 🎭👺
And that’s ok! They should not be forgiven even though they were a result of a very bad childhood as cause! I don’t regret not forgiving any of mine! I feel relieved and vindicated and sad about my inner wounds that caused me to go for narcs. Always going to be a recovery to my last days I think. ☹️
@@Juke582 Because "my narc" is my older sister, and I grew up with her, and am personally aware of what may have led to it, I can't "personally" go this far. Rather I view the situation as similar to seeing someone drowning and desperately grabbing and pulling down the very people who care enough to save them. You can try...and it's admirable to try...but all you can do is your best, and at some point you "must" save yourself...which means you must "let go" and accept that their fate is not in your hands.
Thank you Mel....
This was a very informative video clear and concise I was able to listen intently and understand everything as I've been in this community at least 6 to 7 years thank you so much for your clarity about the unhealed parts and the matching energies that come to reveal them and I don't have to struggle I just need to recognize the distresses what they are really all about thank you so much from beginning to the end I also like what you said about staying to yourself and harboring those energies and then running into them again because you thought you were safe ... And basically losing the old programs if we can identify them instead of being re-traumatized over and over I don't know how a new person would receive this video but of course it is clear to me now because I've been on the path and you said it so beautifully and easily with each step ❤️☝️
This was a good one. I listed to it 3 times. I've been married 18 years and I have been on my own journey of healing for years now which he wants no part of. He is still at spare 1, maybe 2, but he has his own journey to do. Now I'm wanting to move on to better things because who I am no long fits this sinario with him at all, but I feel stuck because I have become his caretaker since he got on dialysis and is legally blind now. I want to live my life and be happy before I get to old. I'm already 55.. ugh!
Phenomenal 💕thankyou, very special woman you are
This was absolutely stupendous, Thank you Melanie, You're absolutely beautiful 💞😀😁😍🥰😘💞😀 Peace, love, joy and happiness to you and everyone, Thank you universe👽🌌🛸♾️😃🐉🌈🫂💫☘️✨️🧿👁🦄😁😍🥰😘💞😀
Is narc abuse ever diagnosed as another condition such as bipolar, depression etc.. ?
Sociopath, borderline personality or antisocial personality disorder.
Hi there. My mother is a narc. I was born in Odessa, Ukraine. I agree with some of the information you provide but not all of it. As you know many ppl on our planet r in relationships with narcs. It just doesn't sit well with me that acc. to you we all came into this life with pain and fear from previous lives. Human consciousness has to shift out of trauma and fear for all of us, including narcs. That is what I think it might be.
17:32 - Or they don’t match the internal program of their love isn’t giving me the dopamine boost that I’m used to.
Needed this today wow. My narc is famous and made a video about our custody and completely lied about everything - it made me literally throw up and have a panic attack. He’s alienated both our daughters -but they become him to a T before they discarded me as well.
I just wonder why so much - why did this happen to me.
My mother killed herself- was a single parent and I’m an only child. She was schizophrenic. Abused me in every way. I was a fantastic mommy to them as O had always dreamed of having daughters and being able to give them what I never had- attention and affection and understanding g and love.
It’s crazy to see your own children love bomb and then shit all over you. It has to be genetic as I was their main parent 90% of the time as he traveled a ton.
After a year of them not speaking with me, I moved out his hometown I hated where he was a big fish in a small pond. I was abused by proxy.
I rented a condo on the ocean in Florida and am trying to live my best life and heal❤
Ty so much. I watched you about 10 years ago when the narc and I split and it was helpful. Here I am again - ugh. Glad you’re still here 🤗
Please be aware Australian watchers, if you sign to Melanie’s program, the pricing is in US dollars - not Australian dollars - which can make it quite more expensive than quoted in promotional videos. I support what you do Melanie, but this information needs to be upfront when reaching out to vulnerable, traumatised and often, financially compromised potential clients of your program. Making this information upfront will only improve the integrity of what you are offering.