Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 9 - Team Four Star (TFS)
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Hellsing Ultimate is owned by Kouta Hirano and Studio Madhouse, and licensed by Geneon, Madman Entertainment, Manga Entertainment, and Funimation.
Episode 09: Abridged Over Troubled Walter
CAST
INTEGRA HELLSING - Corinne Suberg
ATHUR HELLSING - Connor McKinley
RICHARD TRAITORO HELLSING - William Grant Smith
ALCUARD - Curtis Arnott
HEINKELL - Kira Buckland
SERAS VICTORIA - Jesse Nowack
PIP BERNADOTTE - Scott Frerichs
THE CAPTAIN - Marc Swint
THE MAJOR - Nick Landis
HERR DOCTOR - Lawrence Simpson
YUMI - Kimlinh Tran
WALTER C. DORNES - Remix
YOUNG WALTER - Howard Wang
GIRLYCARD - Monty Glu
ISCARIOT MEMBERS - Mackenzie "Hayabusa449" Murdock, Logan Laidlaw
EDITED BY: Stephan Krosecz and KaiserNeko
Support us on Patreon:
www.patreon.com/tfs?ty=h
Alexander Anderson (Hamilton Parody)
/ s-w5jan - Auta a dopravní prostředky
Integra's father: You must stand taller than us all
Integra: grows up to be 7 feet out of sheer willpower
SHE'S 7FT!?!?
Wait, if she's 7 feet tall, HOW FUCKING TALL IS ALUCARD?!?!
@@randomentertainment8927 *yes*
For some sense of scale: Seras is average height for an English woman, but she looks rather short compared to the other members of the main cast
@@netherdominater9960 I mean most character are either massive solders or superpower demon monsters
Abridged version: Walter turned traitor because sexual frustration.
Me: Seems legit.
Well what would you have done when you are a boy who has a crush on a girl which then turned out to be an some hundred years old Vampire Dude who was just trolling you ?
I mean i can understand Walter.
@@susakuzero I'm pretty sure Walter already knew what Alucard looked like when he first saw the girl (or at least he knew Alucard was supposed to be a guy), in the flashback he questions Alucard's appearance. He wasn't even "tricked" which makes it even funnier.
Honestly, it's clearer than why he turned traitor in the original. Always found that confusing.
@@Krwzprtt It's been a while since I read the manga, but basically he always made a big deal about aging like fine wine but in the end he did not actually handle aging well at all and wanted to relive his glory days.
well he dodged a bullet rows of teeth....like a shark
Anderson: "This is a serious fight, okay."
Alucard: "Of course, my beloved nemesis."
vs
Walter: "Take me seriously!"
Alucard: "No 🙃"
The irony is Alucard was going to give Anderson a serious fight at his full power as Dracula but Anderson refused because he just wanted to fight his frenemy.
@@wolfman210 But Alucard still summoned his slaves, he still didn't play fair
@@Breakaway-ic5gjyeah so it literally putting a holy nail into your heart that gives you some god like powers but they aren’t complaining if it’s fair or not hell
@@wolfman210he did give him a full fight. His form has no effect on his power strength. The major says it. They're all faces and souls stolen. Well I guess not dracula since that's what he looked like as human but you get my point
@@simon-peterwilliamson2412but anderson was the better man.he forgave him and even sacrificed himself to get an audience with god.thats something else
The second Alucard explained his relationships as “tags on Pornhub”, all I could think of was “That is terrifyingly accurate”
15:50
He also called her Seras.
I think the repressed memories of the police girl's would have plenty of clips that would go viral on that site by today's standards!
I would probably have a gander at them...
@@Adamnlaw(sprays with a water bottle)
No!
Bad!
I am sickened! Yet curious.
"That's right. It's a blast from the past with that sass and loli ass"
Never change, Girlycard. Never change
Ananda Lel, saw 69 likes on this XD
@@TheDementedSig now's it's 96
girl Alucard should be called Lolicard
Now its 494
Should we really continue
@@dylan030201 You just activated my lolicard
"Oh no, the poison *killed* your father. I *murdered* your father."
Beautifully proper use of the words kill and murder.
Howling Din It’s still the same thing! Lol
@@coreylucas5346 no, it's not.
@@coreylucas5346 Denotatively they imply the same thing. Conotatively, they are rather different, and this scene excellently differentiates between the two.
@@coreylucas5346 Murder is a legal classification of killing or causing the death of another person with the specific intent to do so. Otherwise it is manslaughter. So no, kill and murder are not inherently the same thing.
Mike Pence In that case it would be more like my grandma died of lung cancer, the cigarettes killed her.
"made of vampire DNA"
"You could've asked me"
4 years later I finally get it
Hahaha it's because he wanted Lulu not Alucard
Oh facial.
Huh
Amateur hour
:-0 i just got it.
Holy shit 😂
Alucard: Ever heard of updog?!?
Walter: Nothing much, how about you?
Best line of the night.
"First you kill my dog, then you anti my fucking joke!!"
“Fucking nazis about everything” has it beat
15:00
i’m whooshing myself can someone explain the joke to me😭
@@cor289 The full joke is supposed to be...
Alucard: "Ever heard of updog?" or "God it so sad Billy died of updog."
Walter: "What is updog?" (This sounds like "What's up dog?" like "What's up dog? I haven't seen you in ages.")
Alucard: "Nothing what's up with you?"
It's like Joe Mamma or Ligma Balls. The joke is that Walter saw this coming and thus skipped the second verse and said the thing Alucard was supposed to say. It ruins the joke which is why Alucard said, "you anti my fucking joke" which is why it is funny.
@@alvincarter9686" WIRE you so upset"
"I know it's filthy rich coming from me, but your powers are bullshit" - Holy, this made me laugh so much.
Alucard kind of has a point. At least for the vampire powers, it's magical/supernatural BS. Unless Walter is using some sort of magic (or nanobots like Alexander?), his wires make no physical sense based on their movement. I know Millennium turned him into a vampire and may have given him powers, but it's apparently just Walter in his prime.
@@samuelcacnio9548 Still makes for a badass fight nonetheless.
@@samuelcacnio9548 Yeah, true, that fight with Anderson made a lot of sense for me in original, there was whole thing about symbolism with Dragon and Holy Crusarder trying to kill it, going against his weakness, but succumbing to power at the end... Walter fight? Just a "Meh" factor, because it wasn`t even that cool- i liked "Elevator Action" far more- in english dub, when elevator goes down, you can still hear policemen screaming for help, while Akucard kills them. I mean Hellsing from, i think, 8 tome, went too "Dragon Ball" for my taste, and fight with Walter was just almost "forced" into the plot. Feels rushed and out of place compared to previous fights... Which makes me glad, that TFS did noticed it :)
@@samuelcacnio9548 Nanomachines son
He’s a vampire with vampire-hunting skills. I think. He said somethin’ about vampire DNA.
"I know it's Rich coming from me but your powers are bullshit" - Alucard 2018
Who's powers aren't bullshit in this show? They just sort of tick along until someone arbitrarily wins...
Literally pretty much every character in this is op in their own way
"Power levels are BULLSH*T!'
*WE HAVE COME FULL CIRCLE.*
@@sigilbreaker2628 Hellsing is to Shounen what Deadpool is to Marvel.
But I enjoy both because my inner child will never grow up.
Ok but that line “No mama, he’s was my dog, I’ll do it!” Is too badass for no reason
Do you think he reads books or just eats people who did read them?
@@bodenking He eats the books
@@JS-ys8su I am 100% certain that he has done that at least once, just for shits and giggles.
old yeller hits harder in this format lol
FOR REAL
"Forgetting to feed one's gimp is a common mistake"
Sounds like Richard Traitorus Hellsing is speaking from experience
We don’t know how many dead bodies they got in the basement
I missed that line, where was it?
@@masscreationbroadcasts3:41
I'm a fuck-mothering vampire! I killed a lot of people to get this title; I deserve to be called such!
"It's a blast from your past, with that sas and loli ass"- Alucard 2018 XDDD
"Am I moe enough for you?" - Alucard 2018
@@codytheisen5655 you know it. Also, who is that?
@@M12GProductions who is who
@@M12GProductions I was wondering that too.
M12GProductions it's Alucard as a b**** from the forties
“After all these years, you finally get to stick it in me, and you put it in the wrong hole.” - Alucard 2018
"You are finally inside me, how does it feel"- Big Tittied Police Girl
Tshwene Vincent Baloyi That's what happens when an innocent girl becomes Alucards big tittied police girl. She gets just as perverted a mouth as he.
@@eliteofartorias9162 well i feel like that was more because of pip since he kind of becomes a part of her personality
lets not forget these two gems as well "its a blast from your past, with that sass and loli ass" and "but really you're dodging a bullet there... rows of teeth, *laughes slightly* like a shark"
Ahh! Walter San! Daisuki desu!
I love how Walter is countering Alucard's jokes with wordplays until he starts loosing composture while Alucard never stops being a idiot until his jokes finally manage to get the best of his opponent.
It wasn't just a physical battle, it was a Monkey Island style duel.
“So Arthur’s an *actual* daddy now” had me dying
"Then your first order is.... Keep your arm steady." Bruh the badassery of that line warrants more respect for her character than the canon or otherwise did for her.
I fucking love Integra. Probably one of my favorite lines from her is 'Oh god, is there a rest stop between now and the fucking point?'
I strongly disagree. In the canon, Alucard didn't really even need to ask. She becomes so steadfast, that after picking up the pistol, she doesn't even bother commenting on the situation.
@@jdbrodmdimdidmdu4449 Also disagree broseph. Pointing and shooting in silence is in no way more badass than instantly transitioning from fear and confusion to giving a direct ORDER to an immortal badass legend we know as Dracula.
@@Mizgrievoux The point is also that she didn't even need to order him. He instinctively goes along with what she's doing and she simply asks what his name is as she points the gun. What's more impressive, a dog fetching it's owner's ball after being told or knowing when to fetch it's owner's ball with no request?
@@jdbrodmdimdidmdu4449 whatever you say
"And there is no one alive who can comprehend my sexual preference!" Holy shit Alucard wasn't joking!!!
Like a shark...
Wait... do sharks give birth to live young or lay eggs? Because now I'm thinking about how Alucard would... well I guess now we know what the spawn of Hell is.
@@thesandwich5321 Eggs but the eggs hatch inside the mom and some of the shark species eat each other inside the mom.
@@beiggo21 Now that's just a standard Saturday night.
@@thesandwich5321 no she's just saying it's like a sharks mouth
Heinkel: "I'm fine. How is Yuumi? Can we save her?"
Priest: "Like... in tupperware containers? Because I didn't bring any."
Lmao
Alucard screaming "I feel like we're not on the same waveleeeaaaauagghngth!" as he gets dragged through the building kills me every time. 🤣
One liner fights are always side-splitting!
10:39
"Our family relations can be described as tags on pornhub." LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
I dont get it lol is it because they're always together? XD
@@rebecal.maldonadoperez586 "step"-family.
NoGround step? Sorry I’m not getting it
Titus Lee just go on pornhub and search “step”. It ticks the taboo of incest without actually being taboo. Then it got meta with people making videos starring “not-step siblings”.
@@rebecal.maldonadoperez586 >vampires
>big tit blonde
>police girl
>dominating british woman/(women?)
>insert alucard's entrance as a girl here
Watch any of the other previous episodes and you can pick up on it. There's plenty other queues as well. Either way, that line had my sides in orbit for a while
"Our group relationship can best be described as tags on pornhub, now go." -Alucard 2018
I just wanna know which tags
Go to pornhub and find hellsing episode 1 and that quote is on the video
@@aquamarinerose5405 Nowadays? Most of them.
Try nhentai tags
"Should you come at me? Should I come at you? Should we come together?"
"So, you're finally inside of me. How does it feel?"
Lines like this, delivered when Seras has a psychotic smile on her face, are absolute weapons grade writing. Putting aside how cute and funny it is, it's an example of just how dramatic a shift in her personality Seras has experienced. She's gone from this meek, doubtful, submissive half-breed to a fully fledged hellbitch of the night. Her soul is steeped in bloodlust, excitement and sex. She WANTS Pip to play along. She WANTS him to encourage her, tease her, gas her to commit acts of extreme viiolence. It feels good. She's finally found herself, and he was right there when she did.
POV English teachers:
I was peeing myself laughing when the werewolf died. I was not expecting a high pitched scream.
I was milking a goat when I watched this episode for the first time. The noise I made scared the crap out of both of us.
The screech had me rolling on the ground.
@shewolfroux6091 first time I saw it that noise scared the crap out of my cats especially our Maine coon
@@shewolfroux6091oh if that got recorded, you would have such a funny video
@@assfuckerthejointpounder5834 I keep joking that I need to get a helmet go pro for this exact reason.
I'm still fucking calling it, Schrodinger's real name is Michael McDoesntexist.
I hope to God ur right dude.
Oh my god, that would be fucking epic.
I can't believe I didn't think about that.... what an extremely long set up for a joke
I hope you're right.
I swear to Jesus, that’d be the f*cking longest time coming
"Yes I'm grateful to see you're still well my brother..."
"Richard Traitoro Hellsing"
guys... the uncle was litterally called "dick traitor" pfft hahahaha
He knows he's the traitor, so he pulled off one final trick.
I’m sure if he ever got any power, he’d be a “dictator”
Out of the entire cast, he might be my favorite. Grant steals the first five minutes of this episode
@@bodenking yea, as someone that basically just appeared in the Xenoverse lets play, hes really come into his own as a TFS member! glad that he got a voice role
I just want to point out that in the original Hellsing, Richard was the uncle’s actual name
I get the jokes of "Walter betrayed them cause he want that loli ass" and I do find that hilarious. But I do find it an interesting difference between the original and this one. And I'm going to talk about it way more then I should.
Obviously in the original Walters reasons are different, I think it had something to do with how he wanted to leave a mark on the world. Where instead of being just a servant that grew old, died and was forgotten, he wanted to be useful to the very end and decided that killing Alucard would be the way to do it, becoming obsessed with the idea (and he then joined Millennium, which is why he was "on vacation" during the coup and didn't stop it)
In this one I think it's exactly what he said. He's a vampire hunter, and after having met Alucard, he vowed to kill him. Realising he couldn't do it, he bided his time by serving hellsing and keeping close to him until he could find the right moment. He grows old, and needs to have the Nazis help him regain his old strength to hopefully kill Alucard, especially since now he has no souls left and is vulnerable. It's interesting how the Abridged simplified the motivations for all the characters while still staying partially true to the original. The whole loli thing is probably just Alucard messing with him, especially considering Walter lifterally says "Why aren't you taking this seriously".
And well, while Alucard was messing with him, he was partially right, in the end, Walter did become obsessed with Alucard and the only thing he cared about at that point was killing him, sort of mirroring the original in a simpler way.
@Malenrick So what you're saying is that if it weren't for that beast of a woman Integra, Walter would have fucked the red right out of Alucard's eyes? Symbolically speaking.
In original it's not fully explained but I think it's something to do with him getting beaten by the Nazis in ww2
“Ya, I’m getting balls like a Smurf here”
Never understood that line without the captions, and now that I do, it’s *golden*
After 2 years, I still don’t get it
@@neonshiji3595 smurfs are blue. The nazis interrup the battle hence Alucard is blue balled. Goggle the term, mate
@@legiontepes3474does one need to put on their beer goggles to do so?
After years of watching this i just realized that Luke said "things are finally luke'ing up for this valentine" and now I finally understand why he had to die
I dont.
Bad pun
So that's how the major rembered his name
What a great joke, but why does he have to die
No mama he was my dawg, ill do it
"Forgetting to feed one's gimp is a common mistake." Incredible.
Sounds like he has experience...
Itz true. My ex wife can attest to that. :v
@@VendreadMike95 left tied up too long and forgot you?
@@cunningsmile4166 yes I did
"So Arthur's an *actual* daddy now?" I hate the implications. And mental images.
Weirdly enough, after three years, it just now hit me that it wasn't just Dracula calling Seras by her name instead of police girl; he still does it as Alucard after the change. Very nice touch.
“Sorry. This red riding hood BITES BACK”
That’s such a clever line from Seras. She finally got a great one liner.
"No Mama he was my dog.."
"I'LL DO IT"
Had me dying.
I dont think the younger crowd gets that joke. spoiler its from old yeller the movie.
@@rodneypendleton5911 You know it was a book first, right?
@TheGamingDice Lmao.
😂😂💀💀I can't breathe
The fact that he doesn't seem sad about it totally makes this better. 12:03
"Walter doesn't live in the dungeon he lives under the stairs"
*grunt*
Sepulchre13 a cupboard under the stairs in England because he is a wizard
Almost choked on that one lol
Even her father didnt trust him
@@turma8eac Walter har no freedom
I just noticed, you guys "fixed" the unlit cigar Integra tosses during the Major confrontation.
17:17 the delivery of that "Oh my god-" sounds so perfect, like it fits the genuine disgust and shock of seeing something like that
Dungeon Master: "Why can't you take this seriously?!"
Player: "Because that's what you want! And I'm not going to give it to you!"
D&D in a nutshell.
Honestly, I always though Alucard was more of a VtM man than a D&D man.
Yep
@@Prince__Teclis Same. I wonder what clan would he belong to...the Baali bloodline maybe?
@@JessDC2006
Tzimisce.
Unironically they're famous because Tepes/Dracula is a Tzimisce himself.
"That or my pussy."
Bard: "RRRRGH!"
"Why can't you take this seriously?!"
"Because that's what you want, and I'm not going to give it to you."
Story of my life.
this isn't about you silly head.
So either you deal with a lot of people who don't take you seriously or you're dealing with a lot of asshats who expect to be taken seriously and get mad when you don't
That's a pretty short story
@@TheAnonyomusGuy In all honestly, it's both. Sometimes, you're not taken seriously when you feel you should. Sometimes, ya just gotta lighten up. In this case, you aggressor knows that, and holds it over you.
"Why can't you take this seriously"
Global warming, a fucked up rigged stock market, genocide galores and clowns for politicians and you want me to take this adult foreplay of a society seriously? Be serious yourself and be honest for once WITHOUT anything you learnt to do after childhood. Or did you do like everyone else, and forgot what made you happy at all and pretend like acting as an adult is growing up?
I love the look of utterly adorable concern and disappointment on Sera’s face when she asks if Alucard is using words he heard on social media again 😂 It’s like somehow seeing his daughter make a 101% genuine disappointed mother face and I like to imagine Sera’s actually makes that face FREQUENT when Alucard starts spitting out mad funny’s lol
"in the mouth" and "at least pay my cab fair" made me love that character
"It was a spa day, a deep tissue massage, and a face mask...of vampire DNA."
"Pfft, if you wanted one of those, you could've just asked me."
Nice. Nicely done.
"That and a facial of vampire DNA"
"I could have given you one of those a loooooong time ago"
@GeissRoyal15
In all seriousness, yeah, Walter could've just asked...
Took me three watches to realise that was a bukkake joke...
@@howlingguardian9005 oh ooooooh
I think I get the joke. So what he mean about giving him a face mask of vampire dna he meant by cum. Or maybe it's me thinking wrong.
"Then your first order is keep your arm steady," may be one of the most bad ass things I have ever heard.
Best one......big tittied police girl. That line will go down in history, since she never did. 😉
"Rows of teeth...like a shark" aside from the jolly wally lime that made me laugh even harder
Did you noticed that Integra got sexual aroused when she saw Alucard cosplaying a meat grinder?
When?
HUH?!
"He hit you! What are you going to do?"
"Hit him HARDER!"
Goku applauds xD
That sounds like something Goku would say
"That sounds like something Goku would say."
_"Yes. And remember that time you never beat him?"_
"RGAAAAAAH!!!" *>punch
You get back on your feet, and EAT. THAT. HORSE!
"Holy shit. Its almost as big as my love for you."
"You mean your erection?"
"That is what I call it, oui."
LOVE your profile pic and username!!!
" a blast from your past with mad sass and loli ass..." Is one of the single greatest lines I've heard from tfs
Privilege: Checked!
The voice switch was very disturbing
Joko Luzon but not surprising
"Wait, then that implies that the queen..."
mason ranks i foresaw him saying this 😂
I like to think the only reason Schrodinger is annoying like that is because he gets off on getting shot in the head
"huff and puff and blow me" god damn my sides
The scream after😭😭😂
'But Walter doesn't live in the dungeon he lives under the stairs."
"...That was my favourite pillow!!"
Kimichi Fubaki Walter secretly the child who lived
@@thomas-stilinski8149 walte is the chosen one
You're a wizard Wally!
I've never seen harry potter.
That's why he betrayed Hellsing :^
The pettiness of the line "You're gun looks ridiculous. " is criminally underrated.
Insert TABG heavy barrel
Your*
@@aasdkoaskdasddad6515 are u really gonna be that petty
@@lucascur9310 you*
Z
I like how Walter and seras still have respect for each other after everything
6:38 Al's entire personality makes sense! He's learned everything from the Internet!
"that's right, it's a blast from your past, with that sass and loli ass!" Alucard - 2018
Ben Collier Surprise SENPAI! FBI OPEN UP!
*The FBI wants to know your location*
LOVE that line.
No homo but who else wanna smash that ass
@@csgotrainingbot2160 don't forget the rows of teeth.
14:57
Fun fact: Hitler actually spearheaded the world’s first anti-smoking campaign.
So, yes, quite literally he was a Nazi about smoking.
TFS you beautiful, bastard geniuses
Hey, even the worst of the worst have to have standards.
Oh, well now I really hate him.
Not to mention he loved dogs and wanted to have meat production ended, so add Veganism to that list. Ignore the dogs part as it's a compulsory human trait.
@@Twocoolman115 or maybe authoritarianism and telling citizens how to live their lives is unethical.
*HOW DID I NOT KNOW THEY FINISHED THIS SERIES?!*
Also, Seras and Pip flirting with each other was gold
I've watched this a dozen times and I only now just realized the call back with Walter's vacation in Brazil
"Can we save Yumi?
"Like in Tupperware containers?.....cause I didn't bring any!"
.....best line ever.
Don't forget the line were he says it is like a shark with the roys of teeth down there. It is better
Laura Carey like a shark
Steve po I totally agree best line ever 😂.
@@lauracarey4
*That's hot~*
Looks like Walter made *SUSHI* out of *YUMI* in today's episode!
Walter: "I'm sure you're wondering why I went through all this... Why I abandoned my home and duty, just to KILL YOU!?
Alucard: "oh,because you want to F*** me."
*Silence*
That was golden. Thank you for the show.
lumberluc I agree
In that moment of silence I was like
"He didn't deny it...
*HE'S NOT DENYING IT!!!"*
lumberluc then a few seconds later "consider yourself fucked, Alucard!"
@@excitedcat9517
EXACTLY! So Alucard was right...
@@DemonicRemption If Walter didn't betray them, would Alucard be down to... Go down?
Walter did you know you have paid vacation days?
Oooohhhh.
🤣
Hellsing - “this will be a great anime”
Team four star - “hold my beer”
Jesus I’ve never gotten this many likes before :0
Hellsing: "This will be a great anime"
Team Four Star: "We know how to make it better"
Team Four Star: give me a minute
"Also, get outta me boob!"
"But zere's so much space in here!"
Not IN-accurate.
Phoenix B mmm~
I'd sneak back in and stay...
@@et3inuyasha Ba dum tsssss
I don't get that one. Is it a breast cancer joke?
Legit, out of everything I love in this series, Pip giving her his consent and living on inside her is the best part. When he speaks up and she has that realization, and the conversation between the two of them is just hilarious and epic at the same time. :D "How does it feel?" "Mh-hm! Let's put a pin in THAT!"
"No mama! He was my dog to put down!"
The perfect quote
You literally got the quote wrong
Stand User: Seras Victoria
Stand Name:[Pip My Ride]
The Stand name needs to be something more French
Aren't stands usually song references? To be fair I dont watch jojo's bizarre adventure so i could be wrong
@@mikecabral2420 normally yeah. At the beginning they where tarot cards references and later became song references. [Pip My Ride] is a reference to the song "Pimp my ride".
@@lyraspasar649 oh yeah right. My mind went straight to the TV show and forgot about the song.
@@mikecabral2420 they were named after Tarot cards first. Then some were named after ancient Egyptian gods. Then in part 4 they were named after songs or artists and bands. One of them was both, and had powers that referenced two other songs. After that they stuck to mostly songs but there are a few artists and bands referenced as well.
I would like to see a castlevania abridged just so we can keep the alucard voice actor
I TOTALLY AGREE
Dude yes! Scream it from the hills.
Takahata is great.
@@scotcheggable Dracula, but probably the beginning of the man we love.
He plays Cell in dbza. Perfect cells personality is identical to Alucards as well.
9:39 I mean, so like, it was heavily implied ESPECIALLY in the abridged series, but…like…does this confirm that the entire Hellsing staff are swingers for each other? In terms of the abridged series that is. 😭
I mean, with that level of overt sexual tension, I'm surprised they don't do it every Friday
Seras:"get out of me boob"
Pip:"BUT THERE'S SO MUCH SPACE IN HERE"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Pip was so real for that
"No momma. He was my dawg. Ill do it."
Ol yeller.
Structured differently, the old Yeller quote? Or did you just misquote?
My question is how the hell he even gets that reference.
He got TV like a month ago.
@@antitheist3206 He got *A* TV like a month ago. He's been active for about a decade. And that movie came out before he was imprisoned. Plus he's been eating peoples souls and memories and what not. Soooo yeah, lots of opportunities to pick up on Old Yeller.
@@tinkerer3399
Not really.
Alucard doesn't interact with most humans, and again he *just* got television.
Aside from him devouring people, not too many opportunities at all.
@@antitheist3206 Anti Theist Huh? He's been shown to be a voracious consumer (ha) of media. He has had access to dozens of TV's over the Hellsing estate since he was woken up over 10 years ago. He only recently got his *own* television (and even then he could have had his own TV before that, just not a big screen TV). Additionally he wasnt imprisoned until after Old Yeller had been released for around 20 years. Plus even if you wanted to say that those dont count Old Yeller was originally a book that he could have easily read being in a big posh mansion with a huge library. Even being kept in seclusion for 20 years that's still between 30 and 45 years that he could have gotten that reference. And all of that is without counting all the memories he drank.
At 16:38 oh my gosh lol, need a relationship like pip and Sera's abridged version lol
"Thats right. Its a blast from your past with that sass and loli ass." One of the best lines in this abridged series.
“To think someone so JUVENILE could be so POWERFUL!”
Goku enters the chat
It’s be goku has left the chat goku already watching apparently abridged he’ll sing is one of chi chi’s pornos
Only super Goku is childish
@Mr. Logic Man but I would like you to compare an actual child to a 40 year old manchild.
@Mr. Logic Man you said dragon ball the original. Where Goku was a child.
And you used "as well" to compare the two, even though one is 40+ and the other is under 22
@Mr. Logic Man What're you talking about? The first comment is about Goku, but you made a comparison? Are you not comparing DB Goku to DBS Goku even thought your comment clearly says "Goku was goofy back in the original as well"?
The original comment says "How can someone so juvenile be so powerful?" Followed by "Goku enters the chat"
And then you said "he was pretty goofy back in rhe original as well" you compared the original to dbs by saying he was "goofy in the original as well" AS WELL
FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS I LAY DORMANT WHO DARES DISTURB MY oh its hellsing abridged.
LOL
Vincent: Hello.
I believe this is going to be a VASTLY underrated comment.
Lmao
*laughs in Kakarot*
Alucard's propensity for zoomer lingo is one of my favourite gags of the series, because it's one of those jokes that seems silly and random on the surface, but makes perfect sense on a deeper level. An immortal being is naturally gonna develop a habit of adapting to new language trends; language evolves so quickly that if they didn't it'd become nearly impossible to communicate in only a few generations. It would actually make less sense for him to speak in a way that sounds old-timey, because what sounds old-timey to us is still hundreds of years ahead of his original speech.
13:19 Had to look up the flavorade part and he’s not even kidding. God I love the attention to detail in this show.
I mean the "No smoking" joke is also true. The nazis were super against Germans smoking.
"Did you know you have paid vacation days?"
Walter: "Ooo." Goes to Brazil. LMAO
I think after that, Integra made sure to never let anyone enter Brazil.
@@vaniljacob uhhh u dont know about Alucard in Brazil I'm guessing?
I do, that's why I made that joke.
Now we know where Walter got the idea from for Alucard.
"But Walter doesn't live in the dungeon he lives under the stairs!" "Hmmm"
Walter Potter?
"You're a butler walter" - Hagrid
My favorite line in this episode 2:08
Richard: So did you actually search for her... *OR DID YOU ALL GO TO THE FUCKING SUNGLASSES HUT!?*
I still can’t believe how good the voice acting was
"Keep your arm steady..."
DAMN I love how badass Integra is even when she was young!
And the awesome touch of her girly voice turning into the deeper, BADASS voice she has as an adult.
That´s why Alucard loves her
@@Sabiyori In original sub he tells her that he gets a boner from listening to her while they talked over the phone.....
fucking power move and a half
@@abhabh6896 He said it too here in the abridged too...
That "No Smoking Sign" is a clever joke: considering that it was *_Hitler_* of all people that spearheaded the worlds' first "No Smoking" legislation due to research done in Germany that supported the fact that Lung Cancer was heavily-connected to smoking. Enough support was done into the "No Smoking" campaign that it was mandated throughout most of Germany during WWII.
I think he also put up a bunch of animal right laws and was a vegetarian
@@olivercopeland5438 that's weird, I've heard about him eating meat while he was in prison, before he was elected
@@sasir2013 He lived a long life. Hitler changed over the years.
@@olivercopeland5438 Crazy how even a monster like him could actually have _some_ positives going for him. _(not like they justify the bad shit)_
MrDibara
I mean, most racists tend to love their families. Cognitive dissonance and all that. It’s how we have radical groups willing to dehumanize groups and individuals to the point of mass execution.
"He hit you! What are you going to do about it?"
"HIT 'IM HARDER!"
Okay, Goku
"Rows of teeth.... Like a shark!"
Still would
Walter: "Why can't you take this seriously?"
Alucard-ette: Because that's what you want, and I'm not going to give it to you."
Alucard's character summed up in a single sentence, right there. He doesn't take anyone seriously, specifically because everyone wants him to take them seriously, and nearly all of them aren't worth the effort.
this current form of alucard is named, girlycard. just letting yknow
@@hunterwolf5482 Or maybe *Trap-Card?*
@@hunterwolf5482 don't you mean Galucard?
he took anderson seriously i'm pretty sure, but since alucard knew walter would get cucked by his own surgery, he didn't have to worry.
Alexander Anderson got his seriousness though, he was totally worth the effort
“Except my boss is a woman.
I was a chick in the 40’s.
I hate EVERYONE EQUALLY.
AND THERE’S NO ONE ALIVE WHO CAN COMPREHEND MY SEXUAL PREFERENCE!!!”
That line has SO much more meaning now, holy shit.
rows of teeth
like a shark
Eyes for days, eyes for days.)))
I read the manga so I knew what that meant
@dumbshadow111, Alucard/Dracula/girlycard, changes appearance and form every time he reincarnates, its not that he can change sex so much as hes a new person with the same soul, he can revert back to his previous incarnations but they each have their own differences.
@@aster1760 So... is he a Time Lord?
From "Walter San, Daisuke" till the end, It's just continuous delivery of laughter 😂
"but walter doesnt live in the dungeon, he lives under the stairs!"
"*sad hmm*"
Is Walter Harry Potter?
@@yayap52 eh it could be references
Michael Jazz Yet, hilarious
@@issa4767 nah, if i recall correctly, he has a sweet room (canonically)
*Evil Morty theme playing*
WE WAITED 7 YEARS TO HEAR HIM SAY "Seems like things are Lukeing up for this Valentine"
worth it
No joke I straight-up called that line like four years back I mean if they didn't use it it would have been kind of an obvious joke just left there
Fear the Pig Gaming when you straight up call a joke
7 years..
20:45 Alucard: Mocks anime waifus whilst literally being an anime girl!
"Oh... so Arthur is an ACTUAL daddy now..." that line was underrated
Pip: "he hit you!! what are you going to do about it??"
Seras: "hit him harder!!!"
Piccolo: "that sounds like something Goku would say..."
"Who have you never beat?"
Nail: Have you tried it?
Sera:Ok who because I don’t remember having green slug man in my head or inside me huh gross
Piccolo:You know you sound racist
Hahaha, Nail on the head. Pun intended.
And remember that time when you never beat him?
"that's right, it's a blast from your past with that sass and loli ass"
Alucard sounds like the MC at a burlesque show announcing a very morally questionable performer
Shhh don't talk about Taka's side hustle.
Xtorin O'hern what does he mean by that, plus what did Alucard and the butler turn into
Isn't that how he normally sounds?
@@briannagarrett6637 Alucard was a chick in the 40's and Walter was a teenager that had a boner for that Loli booty
@@briannagarrett6637 what do you mean ? Walter began rapidly aging backwards because of the rushed human to vampire surgery and to taunt him Alucard took the female ( Girlycard ) form he was using when Walter was that young and they were slaughtering Millennium the first time.
Alucard: found in basement
Nazi werewolf: found in attic
whats next zombie in the shed?
"let me get some sip" sounds like something out of a commercial.
Seriously they made seras and pips relationship so wholesome like all the bittersweet aspects is gone...
Even though, they literally make innuendos for most of the time they were together
How exactly ... is their relationship in canon?
@@Shikaschima I have no idea what i meant
@@Shikaschima never really explained, like Alucard’s relationship with Seras and Integra. I think it’s up to the viewer’s interpretation
@@7sLucky I mean they kissed
The captain being a werewolf is actually a call back to a SS guerilla unit called the werwolves who miserably failed at their job
Kyle Shiflet bahhaha
Why the bahaha
Kyle Shiflet it’s funny
@@thomastakesatollforthedark2231 oh
Maybe, maybe not. It is quite possible that he's a werewolf because werewolves and vampires are often associated with each other in popular culture. Another indication that this is likely not the case is that he is wearing the uniform of the Afrika Corp rather than the SS. Fun fact, not all German soldiers were Nazis... many theories exist that the Captain is nothing more than an unwilling participant in Millinium. This becomes more apparent when you analyze his fight with Seras where he basically lets her kill him. That and he wears the Afrika Corp uniform, a unit of Germans that did not commit widespread atrocities like their SS counterparts.
So for a long time I wasn't sure why he was a werewolf AND a ghost. I finally have the answer. The Benandanti. It's a type of werewolf that basically astral projects its wolf form.
Benandanti are Italian witches not werewolves. They astral project yes but no beasts.
Maybe he's a Benandanti AND a werewolf @@glanguish9390
For a moment I forgot I was watching the abridged version.
The:
"Father I dont want yo say goodbye"
"Integra that's quite selfish , I'm dying "
Got me, it was so smooth.
Me : For thousands of years I've laid dormant , who has disturbed my oh it's hellsing
Lmao.
Perfect!!!
@@t0pno7ch33 cell
Think of how strong Dracula would actually be after drinking Hellsing blood. A physical manifestation of evil drinking the blood of people literally descended from angels.
Hellsing is a family of angel descendents? When was that revealed?
@@zombiedemon1762 It isn't revealed in this series, but in mythology, the original hellsing, was the arch angel gabriel, who was sent to earth to destroy great evils. But he took the form of a human man. Hence, he was part human, part angel. Since Integra Fairbrook Windgates Hellsing, is descended from that man, she is in fact, part angel.
@Snoogen11. Thats amazing. I thought Hellsing was only made up by the creator of the Hellsing manga.
@@zombiedemon1762 he was in the book Dracula and he was a goofy doctor and the best version
@Silver days. Gabriel was a goofy doctor?
18:40 *Perfectly cut screams*