Finally talking about it
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- čas přidán 2. 04. 2023
- I am really nervous to post this and shaking for real and I hope it goes over well and I'd love to hear your thoughts on this video for real. I will be reading!!
My new songs:
spotify - open.spotify.com/album/5SewCh...
apple music - / half-asleep-single
pre-save my album - distrokid.com/hyperfollow/dre...
I also talked 30 min more on my Patreon - / drewmonson
Song credits for “Half Asleep” and “Typical”
Written, performed, and mixed by Drew Monson
Mastered by Sam Beckley www.myaudioeditor.com
hi. im serious - Komedie
Jesus you're brilliant. An hour of you speaking feels like 3 minutes. Love you Drew, your sincerity is both moving and inspiring. Keep holding on. Also, stoked for the new album and also that boom box with the built in vinyl player built in is melting my mind it's so cool.
Right!? I was just gonna say it didn't feel like it was an hour. It's reminiscent of The Catcher in the Rye.
AYO the Gare Bear here be spitting straight facts
You both are such beautiful people
Spooky boys reunited pls
@@JohnnyFaith yessss!! they totally shoulf someday!!
When he said "tough love only works if you believe that person loves you" that was so real and I really felt that.
Chills!
He says things I’ve been trying to express for soooo long. When he said that I paused. I think that’s validation happening.
Havent gotten to that part of the video yet but that should be a quote.
He has a knack for saying really deep things in a way that makes it sound lighthearted and a joke
@@Stephania006 "Tough Love" is love or affectionate concern expressed in a stern or unsentimental manner (as through discipline) especially to promote responsible behavior. But if you don't actually believe that person loves you or cares for you, it won't register it as an act of kindness. It just feels like random cruelty.
this video was the catalyst for my sobriety. I’m at four months today
thank you so much for posting this.
congrats :))
This is incredible. You are incredible!
This comment made me tear up. I’m proud of you
Congrats!
I came back to this video because it made me feel so good and hopeful the first time - now I’m going to go into new years sober and needed another watch 🖤 thanks for the inspiration thru sharing your story drew
The doctor's reaction is BS: If someone is coming to the ER multiple times for drug-related reasons that is a cry for help and that person needs support and care
Right? A doctor shouldn’t be screaming at anybody like that💀That’s so unprofessional and weird.
i thought the exact same thing. that doctor was being willfully oblivious of that.
Yeah that doctor needs to go.
@RebaMcImTired Unfortunately, not all, but alot of doctors lack basic empathy, and just life experience to be able to understand situations people can go through such as Drews. From personal experience. Not all doctors are equipped for that, not saying that it is an excuse but it is super shitty.
LA drs are like that
hi so im reading the comments right now and so much of it means a lot to me, im not replying to every single one but I just wanted to say that I probably saw it and made a face at it or felt it in my stomach. especially people who have been watching me for so long and relate to this, it's such a special bond and hope I go on a real tour one day and see people. this was scary for me but im so glad I did it overall.
my 2 new songs are on all streaming platforms now. i hope u listen to them and my album is out on April 17th. and as always I talked 30 more minutes on my patreon patreon.com/drewmonson
Presaved your album and filed the paperwork to change my name to Tyler
here's the Spotify link open.spotify.com/album/5SewChIZlTHVzp7dZuuBUi?si=omQTEV2uQUK52U_F0Otvfg did u listen to it??? btw if you are reading this before watching my video I swear there's more to this and this isn't one of those videos where its called like "my secret" and the secret is they wrote a damn book
i hope you’re having a great day! take a deep breath. you did it. im so proud of you.
I love you so much Drew that I had to reset my facebook password just to sign into my Spotify just to pre-save that darn album. But it's selfish also because those songs are delightful and I can't wait to put them on my playlists.
Also, I'm a fellow addict who is in recovery most of the time. I love you and I support you.
listening to the songs rn drew, love the vibe!!!
Your transparency is brave even if you find it cringe or embarrassing, its not. It's honest. Thank you.
I wanna make a joke so bad but I think I’m just gonna accept your niceness..
I didn’t have a joke in mind by the way I just mean I’m chandler brained..
@@mytoecold That's ok Drew. We know. I know you worry a lot about what you post and how others will perceive you but as someone who has watched all of your content for years, your realness is what draws people to watch you. You aren't trying to sell something or be some influencer. You influence others with your authenticity, with your humanness and all the quirks that so many have and feel ashamed of. Be proud of yourself.
It can be cringe and embarrassing and honest all at the same time. I'm sober and if I couldn't look back on my struggles and laugh at the cringe, I'd go crazy.
I agree ❤
Agoraphobia is one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced
I'm currently trying to get out of it, it's so hard
@@golbetty007 I’m sorry you’re dealing with it :( try to be hopeful, it does get better with time. Mine took a few years to go away but I finally snapped out of it through exposure therapy (by myself) and I can finally look at the world around me and appreciate its beauty like I did when I was a kid instead of being scared of it.. acceptance is probably the key word in all of it. Sending you my love🫶🏻
I've been fighting mine for a while now, I've been getting by, but only by not paying mind to the fact I'm surrounded by people. It's horrible and a struggle because staying home all the time becomes stifling.
@@benamisai-kham5892 I know the feeling of being trapped in your house :( keep exposing yourself to the uncomfortable situations and eventually** it will get better ❤️ stay hopeful I know it’s hard
I feel like I kind of dealt with it a couple years ago for about 1-2yrs. My anxiety got worse than what it was after graduating highschool. Even just going out the front door made me want to start crying. Getting in the car made me super anxious and I just wanted to get back in my room where it was safe. Eventually I started taking my dogs on walks around my neighborhood. Trying to get further from my house every time. Then I started looking into jobs , got one & now I’m free to do whatever I want whoever
as someone who is currently in the addiction stage you described it so so perfectly it made me cry. you make so many people feel so much less alone and it’s incredible. we love you so much
You deserve to get better! @alyssaolinger3721 reach out soon. One foot in front of the other, you can do it, you aren't alone, and you are worthy
"tough love only works if you believe that person actually loves and cares for you"
WOOF thats a kick in the nuts
Right? That part got me too
Please don’t ever delete this video, Drew. It's extremely helpful. I've never seen anyone talk about this the way you have. Thank you for this.
The day I was born my brother who was 2 at ta the time and being minded by a babysitter. He got away went to the farm sad was killed by a tractor. I don't know how my parents coped. My dad died a few years after that.
All I am going to say is I have gone through every conversation and I don't think either of us would have been happy.
My whish I wasn't convinced. His wish the babysitter was better or not needing an income so he didn't need to work that day.
@@ook428I had a hard time making sense of all of that?... But if I am getting it right, I'm sorry that all of that happened.
Upvote
Hi Drew. Guess what? NINE MOTHERFUCKING MONTHS SOBER!!!!!!!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!!!!!! ❤
This video was my wake up call. I was actually smoking a joint on the curb outside my apartment when I clicked on it, not knowing what it would contain. And surprise, surprise, it was just your face and voice appearing in my life and letting me know that I wasn’t alone in my struggles, and that it was okay that I needed to get help. So I finally did. After years and years of knowing I had a problem, of making a breaking promises to myself, of trying to quit and falling back into the name nightmarescape of destructive patterns, I did it. I reached out and got help. And now I’m 9 months sober.
And guess what? I was just elected Secretary of my home group meeting!!!! That’s right, not only am I sober now, I actually run and facilitate an entire MA meeting!! I have a script and everything! All the world’s a stage, baby, and I made the cast list!!
I’m actually super honored and excited about it. I’ve subbed in as secretary a few times already and it’s wild to be of service in the same room that 9 months ago I walked into, broken down and withdrawing and so fucking tired of living through the same old bullshit.
My life is so different now.
Thank you, in your own way, for being a part of my recovery community. Parasocially, sure, but you’re still a real human who effected my real human life. I’m different now, my life is so different now, and I’m so grateful for it. Thanks, Drew. You’re a real mensch.
i’m so proud of you :)
Great going! Congratulations 🎉
ADHD-haver here! After my diagnosis when I took adderall for the first time, it was SO QUIET in my brain and body. It felt like I’d had an army of bees flying around inside my body and mind for years and that the adderall made them take a nap for 8 hours or so. I was so stunned by the silence and lack hyperactive thoughts that, for the first time in my life, I sat there with my eyes closed and was actually able to think about nothing.
Another ADHD-haver here! Stimulants never worked for me, unfortunately. They make me feel like a zombie and don't even help with productivity. So everyone is different, just a PSA.
@@soho6435 o yea, i’m aware! i’m very lucky that they work so well for me cuz i’ve known people in the past who have the same reaction you do. sendin good vibes your way, hope you’ve found stuff to help ya out!!
Totally relate to that!!! After I took adderall for the first time I took the best nap of my life, without having to deal with the incessant inner monologue/random thoughts
@@xXjules13Xx Thanks!
@@emilyetheridge8081 Yeah the only thing they did to me was cure my lifelong insomnia lol. Ever since I was a child I could NEVER fall asleep and turns out its cause of ADHD
I swear Drew is the only person who can share some extremely painful and difficult life experiences and have me cackling with laughter the whole way through
right!! his storytelling is just immaculate
“Sick of having control” is such a great way to describe that feeling. When you’re a perfectionist or people pleaser you get to that burnout point.
this.
right??!!
Oh god you're making me realize this xkkdkd. So true.
yeah.
Yesss
I grew up with Drew.I always felt we were soooo similar with our sense of humor. I’m almost 30 now and have substance abuse disorder. When I tell you this video made my jaw drop. I felt so seen and I feel like us addicts always are on the same wavelength. I can’t really explain it well but thank you drew. It was brave of you to say this. I am proud of you. There are more people like you out here than you think. The overthinkers. ❤
This.
@@goingeverywherefastthat
This and that
Man, I totally remember the first panic attack I had smoking weed. I legit was convinced I was dying. I remember thinking, "I am going to be the first person in the world to die from smoking weed" and being 100% convinced it was the end.
Happened to me too 😅 I literally went to the ER in an ambulance lol so embarrassing
*sigh* brings back memories to when i was stuck on the wall of my hallway for a good minute because i got too high hahahahaha
I work on an ambulance and you’re literally not alone, I’ve had to do a looooot of patient education about panic attacks. Fun fact you can get one from smoking weed whether its your first time or your 1,000th time 😀
I remember being in the car with my “friends” at the time and she took the long way home but in my high paranoid mind they were trying to kidnap me and had laced the weed. I ended up having a panic attack, thinking I was dying and convincing them to take me to the hospital. Good times 🥲
I stopped smoking weed in 1980. Last year I got my medical marijuana card for pain. The weed out there now is so much stronger than the best weed available in the day. I hate to admit it but I can’t handle it. I wish I could, but no matter the strain I still get paranoid or anti-social. I’m a broken Hippie.
Only you could make this story not feel like an uncomfortable trauma dump. You're brilliant. I've missed you.
real
honestly that is kind of my goal thanks
let's be real, it's the Spongebob jokes
The term "trauma dump" is so dumb. It's called being a person.
@@fshoaps trauma dumping is very much real but not necessarily in this context
I’m a 60 year old mother of 4 adult children (your age) and I’ve watched this video 5 times already. Why? Because I’ve been sober for 16 years and this video reminds me why. It is so important and helpful and appreciated. Thank you Drew for sharing your story. Recovery works when you remember where you came from and that you’ll die if you go back.
Anywho…..thanks!
You're a strong fighter. Keep fighting the good fight ❤️
Yes this was a good reminder as to why I am sober; even though it’s only been 9 months.
Congrats on 9 months !! @@xlightknightx
Oh Mama you're the kind of success story the world needs more of. You're amazing.
@@xlightknightx there’s no ONLY in sobriety. It’s one day at a time. Congratulations on 9 months!
I had no intentions of watching the full hour in one sitting, but I couldn't stop. It literally felt like we were on Facetime. Thank you so much for sharing, it's really wonderful to have this as more representation and awareness. I'm so glad you felt safe enough to share and that you're doing better!
There’s very few creative people on here that can talk about something real while being incredibly engaging and funny and relatable. And you just GET it. You name the unspoken thing. And everyone finally breathes feeling like their favorite person really sees them. You’ve always popped back on CZcams when I’ve needed that voice, thank you for existing the way you do and letting us see it, Drew💕
“When you’re so attached to something, you’re not going to blame anything on it because then you lose your coping mechanism” 15:28 this explanation is better than anything I’ve ever heard in regards to this
so so true
I could really relate when he said that because I've struggled with addiction/alcoholism for almost my whole life sadly. Still struggling...with weed and the pills. No more alcohol though. My liver is SHOT from being a raging alcoholic for a long time sadly. I can't drink at all anymore or I won't stop and I'll die and sooner than later....Got a little over 2 years sober from booze!
i can’t imagine how scary it is to upload this, just know we are all here to listen and be with you. so much respect and love, drew. wishing the best for you always
I wish the best for you too
Thanks dude. I’m 46 days sober from cocaine and alcohol, I did 33 days of inpatient treatment and it changed my life. I have a long way to go though. Unfortunately a friend I made in treatment relapsed after and did not make it. My best friend sent me your recent video on loss and both of these have helped me more than you know.
I hope you’re doing well!
Over 90 days sober. Thank you, Drew. ❤ this is the longest I’ve been sober in over a decade. I kind of can’t believe it. I’m so glad I have people supporting me in my sobriety, and at the same time I’m sad that I feel like I lost some people in my life by making this choice of myself. I’m so proud of myself and my choices, and yet the other weekend I was at a bbq and saw some of my old friends who kind of ended up avoiding me. No one said anything to me about my sobriety, but I did notice that no one offered me a joint, which is very unusual, so clearly word has gotten around without me having to say much of anything.
It really hurt my feelings and confused me. It was weird. I wish my friends could be proud of me, but instead they’re acting distant and putting up a wall with me. It made me feel sad in a little kid way, like how it feels when you realize everyone has been invited to a birthday party except for you. I’m glad I didn’t let it effect my choices and just stuck to sipping my spindrifts all night, but I still can’t really wrap my head around their reaction. The way they’re acting makes me feel like I did something wrong, or like I’m some sort of social pariah, even though I’m the same me with the same sense of humor. I wish they could be proud of me, or even just saying something about it to my face. I still hang out with one of my old stoner friends; they still smoke around me and I don’t partake and everything is cool and fun still. Idk why my other friends are treating me so weird.
I’m glad I’m making new friends through my queer sober group. I’m really excited to get my 90 day chip and a hug at the meeting tomorrow. I also joined a sober DnD group, I’m meeting up with some folks to march in the Pride parade on Sunday, and I had a three hour very adhd phone call last night with one of my new friends where we just talked about music and black holes and it was awesome.
I still can’t quite process the hurt I feel in my heart surrounding my old friends, though. I want to speak up to them and say something, but I don’t know what. I wonder if I want to be friends with people who treat me this way. I can’t help but wonder if I did something to deserve this. I wonder if they’ve all decided something about me behind my back. It all feels so backwards and irrational, but I can’t ignore the fact that they’re pretending like nothing has changed while treating me totally differently.
I know it’s probably for the best. I know I want to keep being sober. And I know friends who can’t support that aren’t the sort of friends I want to keep.
But in quiet moments, I still feel sad and lonely and confused. Those sort of feelings were what would cause me to use in the first place. But I’m not allowing myself to numb out and run away anymore. I’m breathing through the hurt. Moment by moment….
I hope you’re doing okay! You got this
@@Puffamallow Seven months and 23 days sober :)
@@clarion3204so very proud of you!! you’re doing amazing :)
@@clarion3204LETS GOOOOOO
I’ve been sober since 2019
And contemplating relapse. I needed this. I’m so grateful you posted.
❤
You got this!
You got this Lindsay!!
ur a tough cookie lindsay u got this
Keep going it's worth it❤️❤️❤️
This is the most honest addiction story i've ever heard. Thank u drew.
i got high and was gonna watch some youtube. i didn’t realize this was gonna be my last time getting high. i needed to hear this.
it’s been exactly 3 hrs and i’m smoking again but this at least gave my the motivation to clean my house instead of binge eating 🙂
I saved this video to my "watch later" 9 months ago when it first came out, and I had no idea what it was about back then but I knew I was intrigued seeing someone from my "childhood" back on CZcams. I never got the chance to watch it back then, and yet I feel like seeing it now was the best time of my life to have ever. After 2 years of struggling with my addiction, I am finally sober. I really agreed with your statement on how addicts can invalidate each other with their own struggles. But the crazy thing is, in my 2 years of severe addiction, there was a solid 3 times that I almost died, and that STILL wasn't enough to encourage me to get clean. So the boundaries are different for everyone, and I totally agree that if it is interfering with your life in any shape or form, that is enough to want to get sober. You don't have to hit rock bottom to finally get help because truthfully had it not been made entirely inaccessible to me, I don't know what my boundary would have been. I probably would've ended up dead.
Watching this video, I have GENUINELY never related more to someone else's content. And that's the thing, I have never felt more understood than when interacting with or hearing the story of another addict. No one will ever truly understand until they themselves have been there. It's so easy to question why someone could "throw their life away just to get high" as an outsider.
I even related to your internal monologue of the vision of your sober self giving an interview as that is something I did exactly amidst the peak of my addictions. I guess it's a coping mechanism that helps us look to the future. I'm glad to say that I'm finally sober now in the year of 2024, but the withdrawal was quite literally one of the hardest things I have ever experienced both mentally and physically. Thank you so much for making this video and for being so candid.
As an alcoholic, currently in treatment for the 6th time…my daughter sent this to me…she said “I just wanted you to feel seen by a CZcamsr we’ve always loved.” Thank you for this ❤
i admire your bravery in trying to improve your situation. you can do this!!!! i believe in you!!!
I lost my mother to alcoholism when I was 19. hadn't seen or heard from her for at least 3 years before. her body deteriorated and by her death she was 5'6 and 75 pounds. i eventually fell into addictions of my own that I'm just starting to climb out of at 26. thank you for choosing treatment, no matter how many times it takes. I hope your daughter never lives the reality I and so many others have. people like you give people like me hope for the future. ❤
This comment made me tear up. I wish you and your family the best. You’ve got this!
You're stronger than you realize! You can become healthier!
Proud of you for getting help, no matter how many times it takes. My dad had a brain aneurysm due to alcohol, and now lives in rehab and will for the rest of his life. He's blind in his left eye, and has basically no short term memory. I wish he would've gotten help, and not been enabled by people around him. Sounds like you have people who support you and that's amazing. Good luck on your recovery journey ❤️
Amazing how you can speak on such a serious subject while being extremely funny simultaneously. I really missed you and your videos!
I don't comment much cause it's scary to me but I felt as though I needed to express my appreciation. Thank you for this video.
Really impressed with your music. Please keep writing if it's something you love, it shows.
SAME, I just realized it existed a couple weeks ago, and I can’t stop playing the album. 100% the vibe and sound I jive most with, it’s so good!
It’s it amazing! “Learn From This” was my most listened to song on Spotify this year.
“dad if you see this call me and apologize, i’m serious” is incredibly honest and simultaneously hilarious as well as too relatable. drew i hope you know how brave i think you are for sharing this much of your life with us, no matter how cringe you might feel like it is or how uncomfortable it might’ve been for you. thank you thank you thank you.
this
read this right when he said it lol
this dude's the only youtuber who can create videos that literally make me giggle in the middle of almost weeping. it's so interesting cause i only ever experience those moments through comparatively elaborate films or music that's perfectly contrived to induce that sorta reaction in the viewer. it's remarkable and beautiful to me how something so ordinary, simple, as a barely edited, random, stranger throws me into such a vulnerable moment
That’s deep and I’m with you on that 100% he is really good CZcamsr and I feel that I can relate to him.
Well said, so true
Yeah, this resonates a lot.
Totally 👍
@@taylorbores7604 t
As someone who deals with alcholism on my dads side and mental illness on my mom's side...I see you, I understand you, and I love you. Thank you for making this video ❤
Be yourself
You are not your parents difficulties
Create your own reality
I’m serious, this really touched me. I’ve been extremely anti-social and depressed since covid hit, and during the past few years i’ve had a lot of emotional trouble that I attempted to fix with an excessive amount of weed and alcohol. Just recently i’ve been trying to get my life back in order and try to feel normal again, but it’s been really hard, so I guess it’s just nice to have even a single person that I can look at and think to myself, “If they can be strong in the face of this, so can I”.
I’m 406 days sober today. I’d listen to hours and hours of you talking about your recovery!
I’m so proud of you.
@@joyfulcookiegaming it's normal to recover from addiciton?
Congrats!!! Way to go! I'll be two years sober on May 31st. Such an awesome feeling. I agree. I could listen to Drew forever.
Omg congrats on your recovery! You’re amazing 💓
@@joyfulcookiegamingSweet child
Being against substances because your family are addicts and then falling into the same thing relates so hard to me. Love you Drew, as someone in active addiction this is putting me in a step I the right direction.
Im in the same boat. Active addiction. Always was against drugs because of my family. Now im an addict just like them. Addiction sucks
I hope ur doing okay. You got this.
Same here. My older brother ruined his life and I always looked down on him and judged him, now I’m in the same boat. It’s so hard when people have no idea about addiction and want to judge you for it. Addicts know EXACTLY what judgements they’re going to face and we’ve heard it all before, but that doesn’t change anything. We ignore the judgement or we let it drag us further into our addiction. I’m glad I’m able to experience what being an addict is like so I am able to understand my brother more and addicts in general. Everything about it is so sad but so liberating at the same time. We will come out Alive. I love tou
I'm five years free of my addiction, it's difficult but it's possible, I wish you the best.
You've got this, friend! No matter how hard it gets, you've got this. I am praying for you.
I'm on day 0 of my recovery. Tried 3 times already and I am going to refer back to this video if I feel that strong urge to make the wrong choice again. It's been a really long and exhausting cycle of trying different ways to numb the pain of things I've mostly brought on myself. I've been in-patient several times due to weed induced psychosis and the trauma of those episodes just gets buried and never resolved. It's an easy cycle to fall into. Getting out will be the most challenging thing I've ever encountered so far. But you have given me so much hope. ❤
this is no joke the best video I’ve seen on this platform in such a fucking long time… I come from a long line of addicts and do agree it definitely has a genetic component to it that makes one more predisposed to addictions. Also I see you and I don’t hate you, you’re a person you aren’t your addictions and you aren’t the mistakes you’ve made. Love you Drew and wanted to comment that this must have been incredibly hard to make and it was well worth it. This video was seriously great thank you man hope the best 4 you always. Congrats on the tunes too, they R dope
I can’t describe the joy I just felt seeing this notification
I clicked so fast
same!
please try I need it!!!!
i started tearing up. i missed him so bad
@@mytoecold it feels like a tingling relief in a pink and yellow way
Ive never really seen someone talk about addiction candidly like this and it kind of humanized it in a way? It was really insightful. Proud of you for working so hard for yourself and for uploading this!
Right?! It's usually the same textbook explanations when anyone is addressing addiction publicly and they don't really hit me authentically... The way Drew explains it is so realistic it's refreshing! Plus he still peppers in SpongeBob jokes, music, dancing, and jokes that keep it entertaining w/o coming off forced or fake or any of that!!💕
Ok, that doesn't make that much sense, but I think u guys get it.😅
The only thing people felt while watching this Drew was seen. More people struggle with this than you know for the same reason you just now felt comfortable enough talking about your struggles. It’s something people typically go through alone and hide, and I’m extremely proud and refreshed to see that this is an issue we can all acknowledge and get through together.
i’m so incredibly proud of you for sharing and pushing through❤️ you’re amazing!!
The bravery in this video is big. It was big of you to be able to talk about such a hard topic and personal struggle.
“When you’re so attached to something, you’re not going to blame anything on it or you’ll lose your coping mechanism.” POWERFUL ❤
I’ve watched this video at least 12 times since you’ve posted this. hope you know this is comforting to those struggling with similar issues. thank you drew ❤
i’m very late but this is genuinely one of my favorite videos on the site. you’ve always been one of my favorite creators growing up and i’m so happy to see you doing well. your words are so vivid, and, i hate to say it but, relatable. and then imagine my shock when you said “anyway, tyler”, i’m a bit of a mess right now but thank you Drew for sharing your story. sending all my love!! 💖
Sending you love Tyler ❤
Sending you love Tyler! 💗 we’ll get through this.
I'm 5 months sober. And to hear a creator that I have loved for close to 10 years is going through the same struggles, means so much. We all love you Drew, thank you for being so open and honest.
Congratulations!
This really does make me so happy for him & a little more seen bc you never hear about anyone online dealing with these kinds of struggles be so open about it 🥺
I'm proud of you stranger :')
That's a huge deal. Be proud, and keep going strong!
Oh wow this is a blast from the past! I went to middle school with you Drew, we had band class together! You were hands down the funniest kid I knew. I remember you started doing youtube around that time and we'd all talk at school about how hilarious your videos were. It sucks to hear that you went through such a tough time but congrats on your sobriety! I'll always be rooting for you!
This warmed my heart so much
This is so sweet
Hope he sees this
what did you play??? thats crazy!! im trying to remember you! my memory is kind of bad (because of the things I mentioned in this video)..but seriously thank you so much!! much love
I was soo bad at trumpet right
DREW! I felt this story in my bones. I went into detox at the beginning of the year for alcohol. I had been drinking 12-14 drinks a day (+/- a few) and I'll be hitting my 8 months soon! I see this video was about 4 months ago, so congrats on your 10 months!! I'm turning 28 next week, so it's really nice to hear a recovery story from someone my age. You're not alone, we're in this together
Congrats!!
I’m currently in alcohol withdrawal and I want to make this the last time that I detox or drink.
Thank you for making this video. You’re making me laugh and I feel just a little better.
I hope you’re doing well. X
We are so proud of you for hitting 6 months sober. This is incredible. You deserve to be healthy and happy.
4 years clean from Heroin/Fentanyl, & 2 years from EVERYTHING else. This is a brave & wonderful video to see. Your honesty is refreshing. Love you Drew ❤
massive congrats to you, keep it up
Happy for you! I wish I could 😔
I'm so proud of you! I am 4 months clean from heroin but I still struggle with cocaine here an there. I do gabbapentin every day and without it in sick but in slowly weaning myself from it
Congrats Anna!! Its hard to do , one of the hardest things I've ever done for sure. Thats amazing. Lets make our 4yrs into 5 and be on the journey together :)
year and a half here!
I have never seen your channel before. I was curious about your topic and hesitant about the length of the video, but the time flew by. You’re an excellent story teller, very engaging. I’m glad you’re overcoming your addictions and shared your story. Continue to hold on!!!
Hi Drew. Today I hit EIGHT MONTHS SOBER!!! Thank you, again, for this video ❤ My life is so different these days. Last night I got back from a Potluck and Game Night I organized and hosted at my local queer recovery center, and I was so happy and full of energy and good food. It was amazing to be in a room full of sober people laughing, playing and having a wonderful time. When I hit my rock bottom earlier this year, it was marked by a feeling of such deep isolation and loneliness. I felt like my life was just an endlessly repeating pattern of going to work, coming home, getting high alone, passing out, waking up in the morning, getting high again, and going back to work. Things felt so sad and grey and I didn’t know how to change that because I was so resistant to giving up getting high. I knew it was probably the source of so many of my problems and isolation, but it also felt like the one relief I had from those problems. I didn’t see how getting sober could really be a way to make my life better, but watching this video of yours made me come face to face with my problems and consider that maybe, just maybe, it was time I finally give it a shot.
I had so much fun last night at the potluck. There was so much laughter and so many people came up to me to tell me what a great time they had and thanked me for organizing the event. I know I never wouldve had the follow through to put something like that together if I was still getting high all the time. It was especially heart warming to meet people there that were new to recovery, like I had been just a few short months ago, and watch them prove to themselves it’s possible to have a really fun Saturday night without getting high.
I’m learning how to build the sort of communities I want to participate in. I’m not isolating myself anymore, I’m reaching out and bringing people together. The other month I started an ADHD Book Club, and i’ve been meeting up with friends at coffee shops for writing dates. In fact, I’m now running late to a writing date right now. I’m still so anxious about writing and caught up in my perfectionist tendencies, but finding accountability buddies who relate to that struggle makes a word of difference. Okay, I’m gonna run, but I just wanted to pop in here on my 8 month soberversary with an update and another thank you thank you THANK YOU. I hope you’re doing well, Drew. :)
I have so much love for you I literally kissed the screen. That is all ❤❤❤
We feel the same when you post ❤❤❤
This comment is ADORABLE 😍❤️ and I'm with ya!!!
Aww❤
i love both yalls vids.
Love you Alexandra!! 😍😍😍
I’m so deep into this parasocial relationship that I genuinely thought drew knew how much I needed this and decided to come back for me.
no same.
@@jessicaireland9052 same. 🤎
It is such a parasocial relationship. I’ll like fall asleep to his videos
Honestly same
Same beach
If I could like this video twice I would. Second time watching this and I still get goosebumps. So incredibly proud of this stranger on the internet. Way to go Drew.
I think this is something people need to hear, its easy to get emotionally attached to substances and its so easy to get ahold of them now. im so proud of you to be able to talk about such a sensitive subject to so many people and to be able to overcome a situation that's so so difficult to leave and get help for
Watching this actively high is making me feel like I need a wake up call. I started it sober, finished it high, but changed my viewpoint entirely. Thank you Drew.
Ditto. We got this!
you can do this, you are strong
tried not to hit my pen the entire time i watched this
Same girl
same
I’m sure this will just get lost in the comments, but this video helped me recognize my problem with alcohol. I quit cold turkey two days ago, and spent the last two nights in the ER being treated for withdrawal symptoms. My mother was an alcoholic and passed away from complications with her addiction, and I never want to be there. Thank you for helping me recognize I needed to make a change.
i don’t want this to get lost in the comments, im very proud of you!
im so proud of you like seriously
i'm sure you probably know this now but just in case. If you ever have to quit again do not do it cold turkey. It's too dangerous when it's alcohol. As I'm sure you learned in the ER. Hope you never have to do it again but never be too afraid or ashamed to keep trying if you have to go though it again.
I know you can do it. You can do it, you can do it, you can do it. I am so proud of you.
You CAN do this, as the ones before me have said. I am clean three years- they have been some of the best years of my life! Sober is always better ❤
My daughter had this video on, and I've always liked your content, so I sat down to watch and just wanted to say, I can 💯 relate to the addiction. Especially the pills and when you were describing the breakdowns (even though you had me cracking up) It was like you were describing my exact experiences. Stay strong, sweetie!
Watching this video for the first time now, I guess this is when I needed to see it. Thank you for continuing to be you, being honest, and giving us your art ♥Thank you for continuing to come back, we definitely miss you during your absence but I'm so grateful you were getting the help you need to heal. Keep writing and sharing your music!! Your impact on the world is immeasurable.
drew i’ve watched you since 2015, and this sounds so cheesy but genuinely your videos are art. the way you speak, the profoundness of your words, the comedic relief, like truly you are so gifted. i used to play your break up video over and over again and cry just to feel something. miss you, wish you well
He’s so amazing and a gift to the world. He doesnt even realize how he really makes our day and his candidness is so refreshing.
Every time you upload it feels like getting a video message from a middleschool penpal I havent heard from in 15 months but I'm glad to see you, even if you aren't doing well or arent happy its nice to know you're around. its ok to not be doing well, but we're all rooting for you.
My thoughts exactly ❤
I resonate with you so much Drew. You put into words so many struggles that I’ve been reluctant to even be vocal about and I appreciate you so much for that. I want to thank you for your vulnerability, I’ve truly always adored your humor and manner of telling stories ❤
Thank you for this, I’ve never really watched your videos, mostly just collabs. I really relate and feel seen I’m recently sober off the ZaZa and nicotine and it’s been a roller coaster. The way you describe how it made you feel I really related to and it feels good to know I’m not alone. I hope you’re doing good and keep up your sober streak! You got this! We got this! Anyone out there struggling you can do this!
Very strange timing of this video 😅 I’m 38 days sober today after having a very nuclear mental breakdown and realizing I need to get clean. I wish you the absolute best Drew I have so much faith in you to live the life you deserve. ❤
I have faith in you too!!! honest and thank you so much
I can’t express how thankful I am that you are talking about this candidly. I think I needed a sign, and this video was it. I hope that makes sense. If you were hoping this video would help at least one person, it did ❤
take care ❤️ i believe in ya 💐👑
You are worth it. Take care of yourself. You can do this.
You absolutely got this. 🧡🧡
you’re not alone, i hope we both get to the changes we need to❤
🫂
love you drew. you are such a light even through hard times. you are one of the only CZcamsrs i will still watch. you deserve the best
I have never heard you before but thank you for sharing and being so vulnerable. This was really open and honest, the way you do storytelling is entertaining yet this will still help those who are struggling also with similar problems
This is one of the best conversations on addiction I've ever seen. You've always been an incredible story teller and quick witted, but the severity of the topic isn't compromised. And you're so right about "not being enough of an addict" talk making people apprehensive to asking for help. You're the coolest, drew
I just realized what scares me most about addiction- not the danger to myself, but the judgement of others. It is terrifying to think people would look at me like I'm worthless because I'm an addict.
Yup. I struggle even telling people im recovering. 8 yrs sober i should be proud to say it, you'd think.
@@littlebrandylovexoxo i’ve been surrounded by addicts my whole life. if anything, recovering addicts are the best people among us. congratulations on being sober, and i’m praying for you even if you don’t believe in god. truly happy you got out of a world where either you die or get out, there’s no inbetween. congratulations again.
@@aryannawooten3283 thank you so much!
we JUST starting to realize it's a health issue and not a moral issue. i personally have no problem with telling people i was a heroin addict because i hope that going thru that and now being 6 years sober, may inspire people. and for the people that judge and say ignorant/hurtful things; thank you just showed me your true colors! had a coworker tell me once he thinks all addicts should be taken to an island and left there. it helped me know he wasn't someone i wanted to waste my time conversing with.
@@littlebrandylovexoxo you should be proud, you should feel amazing about that feat, not shamed. remember some people truly just don't understand and don't know what it's like to live as an addict or love an addict. but the people that do understand, will find strength in your story. congrats!
This was so moving, and appreciate you sharing your story even though its so personal. Ive always loved your videos and this is no different. I will definitely be listening to your music, and cant wait to see more content, but be sure to take care of yourself first❤
I remember watching you years ago and thinking you were (and still are!) such a unique and creative person. I never got so bad with my alcoholism that I needed to go to rehab, but a lot of what you talked about resonated so much with me. I'm now 14 months sober. I am so happy for you and so proud that you are able to reflect on all that happened and be able to speak about it. That part is so important.
I’m so fucking proud of you. I know this is a parasocial relationship, and my words do not and should not matter to you, but if you do see this, Drew, (or if you’re a viewer reading this who is thinking about getting clean or has gotten clean for any amount of time,) I really am proud of you.
I’ve had a lot of people close to me, and in my life generally, who have struggled with addiction in many forms. I’ve seen people lose their lives and take their lives at the hand of substance addiction. I’ve seen the aftermath of families destroyed by this.
It’s a brave act of compassion for yourself and those close to you for you to work toward your own physical and mental health and stability. It’s hard work and healing isn’t linear, so please, please don’t forget to be at least a little kind to yourself through all of this. It may not be worth much coming from me, but I do really believe in you. And I know there are other people out there who believe in you too. Please don’t give up.
My partner took their life in July. We used to love watching Drew together. I hadn't realized I haven't seen him post since. This notification was a wild ride. Love you Drew, thanks for being vulnerable and hilarious
I am so so sorry to hear about your loss. Please know that you’re not alone and I really hope that seeing this video brought back some good memories. I really wish you the best❤
Sorry for your loss🙏🏼
I’m sorry for your loss
I'm so sorry for your loss. ❤
This happened to a close friend of mine with her partner. I don't think she will ever stop hurting.
She has recently married (quite a few years later) and loves her spouse, but will always love and miss her partner who has gone.
What I'm trying to say is, you are not alone - though it may feel like it right now.
Sending love to you ❤❤❤
That’s very true feeling like your addiction isn’t good enough for rehab & detox. I once was at detox I checked out early coz I overheard one of the nurses saying they don’t think I should be there because my addiction was prescription drugs. And my addiction has persisted ever since those 6 years ago. Now this month I plan on going to detox but not sharing with any of the people there what for again.
This video really spoke to me, especially the end about judging others. My family has a history of addiction and I always held some judgement against people who would use substances, but hearing your story and really understanding your words changed my pov on it. It's not a choice to become addicted, even if it was a choice to try a substance. And people should be given compassion, space and time to heal. thank you for sharing
I work in addiction medicine and the stigma is astounding, people don’t see how much work it is to get sober and maintain recovery. Drew and everyone struggling with an addiction, please be kind to yourself and recognize how much work you’re putting in ❤
“Even if it’s sort of a horror show, somewhere else is good enough”. This really resonated. So grateful you shared, addiction is so powerful. I’m 4.5 years sober and grateful every day for sobriety.
resonated with me too. i remember trying edibles for the first time and crying from relief because i had found somewhere else i could go
I read your comment at the exact moment he said this quote i don't like that
im not addicted to any drugs, but i am addicted to self injury. so many experiences you shared in this video really resonated with me. being so obsessed with it that you start connecting it to everything around you, and worrying/being embarrassed that you're not "bad enough" to get help are really relatable. this video really opened my eyes to what im actually doing to myself. i know it isnt the same but when you said "just the stress alone of having an addiction, no matter what it is, cant be good for your body" really really made me realize how much im destroying myself. i dont need to be the "worst" to get help and recover. idk where im going with this but i just wanted to say thank you for this video
This one feels like being at a sleep over with a close friend. Thank you for being real. ❤
I struggle with drug addiction too. It’s at a point right now where I feel like I really do want to stop. I take seeing this video as a sign that I definitely should.
It’s time my love. Your best life is ahead, along with some of the hardest parts as you learn to lean on your strength to cope with being in recovery. You can do this!!
I had a 25 years coke addiction - the last few years it was nearly everyday. But I’ve been just over 3 months clean and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done. My health has improved and I have tons of money now. Please do it now so you’re not like me and ruin your life because it’s 25 years I can never get back. Good luck 🤞 you can do it 💪🏼
I am proud of you and rooting for you!
@@zoegrimes2070 I don’t know if you mean that to me or the poster. Either way thank you 🙏🏽❤️❤️
@@emmajane9403 both ❤️
you’re an absolute creative genius even when you feel like you’re not. I’m so proud of you for putting this out there and I think it shows so much healing. we love you drew! and your new music rocks
Well said :)
I hope he knows how loved and appreciated he is. This video made me feel so much better, and I can relate to almost every point.
I agree with you 💯
You are creative, you are better clean, you are loveble, you deserve the empathy, you can't be "not sick enough", life is tough but you made it! congratulations buddy
Ive been watching your videos for the past 10 years and ive always thought you were so funny and real in a way nobody else was on youtube both at the time and now. The past year i spiraled hard and this video came on my newsfeed when i needed it most so thank you. Watching this video feels like a hang out session listening to an old friend explain what they've been going through down to the candid funny nervous moments, this has helped me to see things from a different perspective. Im so happy to see you live your honest truth and help others to discovered theirs
My brother died from a laced heroin overdose 8 years ago today, 4/3. So echoing the people that have said this came out today for a reason. So happy that you are on this journey and doing well.
Blessings to you as you heal ❤
:( what a sad coincidence but I choose as well to believe it’s a good one! I hope you like SpongeBob wow
@@mellymel6447 thank you ❤️
@@mytoecold I’ve honestly never seen the show but I still got and appreciated the jokes 😂
DREW you have been missed tremendously so happy to see you ❤❤❤❤❤❤
thank you Holly. your shirt makes me believe u are happy so thanks
Teddy fresh drip
@@mcweezwe love teddy fresh, bout to watch the pod rn 🫡
@@mcweez manifesting drew on h3
drew you are so wonderful. i loved listening to this i feel like it contained subject matter so many people can relate to and i appreciate you being so open about these experiences. i relate to u on a spiritual level and i loved hearing ur experiences and how ur currently healing from them. i’ve never heard someone articulate these experiences so well, beautifully put
So so so so well spoken, your story is very important and well told, and I'm happy to be able to listen to it :) I relate in a lot of ways.
Y'know despite all the real talk in this video it's still told in Drew's lovable storytelling and you just want to laugh and cry at the same time
Literally
Your candid honesty is amazing. It reminds me of Katya Zamolodchikova talking about her addiction & psychotic break. It's not a world I've been in, but hearing people talk openly & honestly about how they got to where they are/were is a great way for people to gain some insight on addiction & hopefully some empathy, too.
It reminded me of her too
OMG Katya and Drew are two of my fave people!!😅😅 How random!💕💕
@@CrystalCat24 same!! this comment made me realize how similar they are lol
Really enjoyed the clips of your music! Immediately went and downloaded. I’m excited to listen to the rest of the album and I hope that your music career thrives 😊
I just found your channel, I’m glad you are taking care of yourself. I’m subscribing for the long haul!! I can’t wait to see what kind of content you put out.
Also, if you’re still clean, congratulations on 10 months of being sober. That is fantastic. 💕
I was in the middle of taking a hit of [insert bad drug here] when you said "stop being so mean to yourself". My eyes welled up and I started crying. I've been doing this shit almost 15 years. I wouldn't wish an addiction on my worst enemy. Drew you are so strong for making this video. I'm in awe of your honesty. I can't even be honest with myself, yet you just opened yourself up to the entire freakin' internet. That takes massive guts. Thank you for being so candid and for reminding me that I deserve better than this. We all do.
at some point, we'll be ready too.. schöne grüsse
You can do it! The leap is hard but when you allow yourself the opportunity to prove to yourself that you can be the change that you cry about when you're getting high and mentally beating the shit out of yourself!! I'm a year and
Traci did you die before you could finish that comment
Different but similar. I just finished purging (I've had an ED for a decade) and hearing someone talk about their struggled in such a genuine way, reading the comments... It's both heartbreaking and comforting in a way I can't yet explain.
The video didn’t get but this did 😢
When you talked about having agoraphobia during the pandemic I almost cried because I haven’t heard anyone talk ab having the same struggles, I stopped going out of my house before I turned 18 and I am 21 now, hoping to get the help I need soon. I’ve been watching your content for years, You’re amazing drew and I’m proud of you :)
I have agoraphobia as well. It means a lot when I see someone who’s like me.
Good luck to you ❤. My husband has it, so I get how hard it is.
I struggled with agoraphobia since I was 15 and had anxiety induced seizures until I was 18 when I slowly improved and adjusted . Covid really brought the problem back , it’s hard to get back out there . I hope you get the help you need ❤ advice my psychiatrist gave was to sit by the window everyday for some time and stand inside but with the front door open , and eventually sit outside a little bit everyday , as long as you can even for a minute . Hope this is some bit helpful 💕
You are not alone ♥
This is embarrassing, but I'm 30 and I still struggle with a lot of the agoraphobia I did in my 20's.. but one major difference; when I DO find myself out in public.. I honestly just don't really care anymore. I used to feel like everyone was staring at me. Now, I make it a point to lift my head and look around.. the reality? No one even cares or notices you. Go out, be comfortable, feel safe, and have fun, even in a Target aisle. Keep going out more. If you can, go out with friends, or someone you trust a lot. It helps to make you start going out on your own.
From one raccoon to another, I hope things get better for you ♡ getting out is hard
Hi Drew, thank you for making this video and sharing your heart. It got me through a very difficult hour in a difficult day, and I know it’s going to be incredibly helpful for other people to hear you talk about your story. I love you and appreciate you and am so glad you’re here
I use to work at an ER and it's so true most of the nurses and doctors have zero sympathy for anyone coming in for using any type of drug/addicts, the homeless, and sadly most of the SI children (they always say they do it for attention). It broke my heart, they are very desensitized, never look deeper into any situation and just judge and project. I was only registration at the time but am in school now
Ya I've experienced this & its horrible. I've been clean from pills & cocaine for many years. I put so much shit up my nose for a good 10 years & because of that I have a bad deviated septum. I've been to 2 ENT's in my town for help. The second they realized my septum issue was from drugs, the whole mood changed. They sent me back to my family doctor because they said I needed "more help" which is just so wrong. I've been clean for so many years & had proof with urine tests for all of those years. I still haven't had help with the issue. I kind of gave up. I want it fixed because I've worked so damn hard to change my life for the better. Its a reminder of the mistakes I made in the past. I wish I could get help with it so I can really move on.
I've had this; I am a disabled 'vulnerable' adult with learning disabilities. Was committed for depression after an attempt. It had on my notes that my mother had abused me...the first things someone told me after waiting five hours was "it is selfish to do this, what would your mother say?"
The world needs you! Good luck with school❤
yeah, i think they see self-inflicted situations as being a waste of their time.
i remember being in the ER after an attempt by overdose. a nurse snapped at me for being drowsy and not understanding a question. i've never forgotten that moment. i had started to feel numb and tired, and the way she spoke to me right then shocked me back exactly an hour and a half, right before i had decided to swallow all the pills. i remember apologizing to her, which just pissed her off more because she needed an answer to a question lol.
Amazing bc children are literally incapable of lying abt that