My Russian Side (Full Documentary) (2014)
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- čas přidán 18. 03. 2017
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On this channel, I invite you to join me in exploring the intricate tapestry of my life. As a Russian-New Zealand adoptee, I open up about my experiences, shedding light on topics that resonate with fellow adoptees. From vlogs to illuminating stories, this space is dedicated to sharing not only my own journey but also the inspiring narratives of others who've walked a similar path.
Having been adopted at the age of two from an orphanage in Arkhangelsk, Russia, into the embrace of my New Zealand family, I delve into the path of my cultural upbringing, the history that has shaped me, and the meaningful connections I've made with my birth family. My quest to uncover the missing links of my heritage takes me to Russia, Ukraine and Kazakhstan, each step a chapter in my evolving story.
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![[Vowel]물고기는 물에서 살아야 해🐟🤣Fish have to live in the water #funny](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3G9MH063Cx4/mqdefault.jpg)
Hello Everyone! As the music here is in fact royalty free and we have the correct licence, a copyright holder has claimed the entire documentary as their own when they only have a short piece of music at the start. This documentary has since been trimmed with their music removed so the first original 35 seconds of this documentary is now removed. So it might seem like it's jumped a little bit in the beginning. Sorry about that!
Your birth father's face the entire time you were around = pure joy.
To me, finding out about the baby sister was icing on the cake!!! I hope the two of you grow closer and closer and are always in each others lives! What a treat and joy that would be!
He definitely has his father's personality and some of his mother's gestures.
He looks like his father, physique, and personality
Your mom loves you, she seemed shocked and maybe full of pain ,guilt ,remorse..I'm sure the next time she'll be more loving. I'm so happy for your you.
I love how emotional your dad gets about the other children in the orphanage. He would have taken all of them if he could!
She had to survive. She gave her little boy the best she had - a chance to live safe and fed. The good Lord blessed you with great adoptive parents. My heart is overjoyed by your story.
I think part of his Mom's holding back emotionally at first was shame of her getting pregnant outside of marriage and then on top of that taking him to an orphanage. Plus, there were so many people there. Any woman taking a child to an orphanage would have deep emotions about that. Seeing his baby pictures was probably very very hard for her. She has had a hard life. I think she is a good decent woman. She did agree to meet him which was very brave because she didn't know if he would blame her. She seemed sad about her loss of seeing grow up and embarrassed and ashamed about adopting him out. But her courage in doing so allowed him to be adopted into a better life. I really felt for her. Her son, Alex, is wonderful person and I know she is proud of him for the good man he has grown to be. I think he did the right thing in contacting his birth parents for his and his parent's sake.
Holly and Ivy i might able to feel her emotion when she looks the photos of you growing up. It might had wrenched her heart...
And she probably does not want to get attached to him knowing he is going to leave
His mother has never been mothered herself so it would be hard for her. And the guilt as well my goodness.
Exactly.
And not wanting to burden your child with your own emotional needs - oh gosh that's so Mum.
Alex if you ever see this, if you were my son I'd be so PROUD.
His birth Dad is quite amazing... but I feel that way about his birth Mom too... She was nervous and felt bad... but she met with him... and facillitated the meeting with Alex's birth Dad... thats pretty cool... Good on her!!!!
It's a an amazing story. I feel sorry for the mum, she looks so sad and depressed, it looks like live wasn't easy for her. I hope you'll bond with her.
I suspect she's too embarrassed to smile because of her teeth. She'd most likely be a different woman if her teeth were fixed. She would have liked to laugh openly, I'm sure. As it was, she had to keep her lips together and when she smiled, she covered her mouth. She was beautiful when she was young as shown in the photo of her when she was about 18
b I agree. She looked so uncomfortable the whole time. I know what that feels like and you can't wait to get whatever it is over with so you can hide away again.
@Reuel T what?!?
@@BND58469 she is still beautiful
Your papa and mama in new zealand are very nice people.
Your mother seems to have had a tough life, stuck in poverty and hardship. I can imagine she had to turn off alot of her feelings just to get by. It sounds so horrible but it seems giving you away was the best thing she could have done.
tamousha that’s the way they are, Russian don’t show feelings😬
+esteban cervantes do you know any Russians or ever lived in Russia?
@@estebancervantes9023 wouldn't agree completely. They usually don't do towards foreigners, but when people get to know you better, they change completely.
@@estebancervantes9023 that doesn't make any sense. His father is also Russian and he shows plenty of emotion
@@estebancervantes9023 not true
You look like your beautiful mother. Your father is gold.
Alex looks so much like his dad. I loved his dad taking him to the park that was so cute dking father son bonding, he just seemed to want to do fatherly things with him
Your birth mom and her husband, both miss you before you even left!! Beautiful!!
You and your birth dad are so much alike!! Laid back and fun. I’m glad both of your parents desire to spend more time with you. You have a beautiful baby sister waiting to learn more about you, also. You are richly blessed with 3 families. Cherish all 3 families and make precious memories with them.
The mother's husband was so welcoming and so cute! he got really teared eyed
He looks so much like his Dad! Their profile is the same!
Alex, your father is an extraordinary person! He wanted to do something special for you, i'm sure giving his demeanor and personality that in some way he was making up for not being there for you and not knowing you existed even. So this was his way of doing something "crazy" something memorable that you will think about and smile lol even tho it was colder than a witches foot outside. He seemed so overwhelmed with joy and happiness to know you, most men would have not been this way; maybe even rejected you because he had a family of his own and another very young child.
He looked as tho he could have done back flips for you, his reaction to meeting you was overwhelming for me and also made me miss my dad who has long passed. Your Mother on the other hand was more timid i think because of her living conditions and her life. You are very much like your Dad, you made her feel so much at ease and that it was all about her and not of what she did or didn't have. It was very obvious that her life had not been very kind to her but, your visit i'm sure made her feel that she had done something right in her life; you are her bright spot and i know she thinks about you daily. Alex, you are a bright light that comes from both your birth parents and your adopted parents. They did an awesome job raising you to the person you are today, both sets of parents are very proud of you. Keep shining your light on others and spread the love my friend, i also am proud and don't know you.
Pinky Ackerman your words are so profound. I am crying...
A very nice comment, indeed
Well said.
Pink Ackerman, If she was born in 1972 all girls around the globe constantly were told at school, on TV, by parents, everyone don't do anything unappropriated and stupid especially with guys. Tatiana when she was young could get some education, be a nurse or childcare worker (those courses are not so difficult to graduate from). She could definitely have different life, but her choices were opposite. Probably she was in relation ship with someone else, that is why she didn't try to talk about her pregnancy to Michael. She was not a little girl when she gave birth to her son in 1992. She was 20 years old. At list she could protect herself from getting pregnant. Condoms were available at any pharmacy at that time.
All girls from such countries like Russia know very well don't have sex before marriage or if they have sex, they must protect themself, because if they get pregnant their lives will be difficult. My friend is the same year birth as Sasha's birth mother. She had the same vocational education course as Tatiana, but my friend lives in Portugal now. I immigrated to different country too as my few other friends as well.
Tatiana when she was young decided to have fun instead. So...
@@4Dwooorld From what I have learned from the story is that she grew up in an orphanage and that the orphanages at the fall of the Soviet Union were awful. We don't know the whole story of her life and why she did what she did. I think it's very harsh judgement that is being placed on her here. She could have aborted, if she had the chance, but did the right thing in placing her child in an orphanage where he was eventually adopted into a better life. She also had no other kids afterwards, and so I don't really see a reckless young girl having fun here.
Your birth dad seems like an AMAZING person. I'm jelly AF I've always wished for a father in my life :(
No one is mentioning the presence of the camera, recording these wonderful meetings. For the younger generation, CZcams and social media seems harmless. But for an older generation, perhaps one that can remember the Soviet Union when being filmed could result in something very bad happening, such meetings in front of a camera could cause a person to feel uncomfortable and need much longer to relax, trust and warm up.
How eloquent. Everybody's so warm, and human...your mom did what she thought was right at the time. I don't know how I would ever have acted in the same situation (I am an American woman, aged 70, living in NYC with my hubby)...
I haven't watched the entire documentary. I've only seen the two short videos. People are saying
The father only knew about his son's existence for a short time. In contrast the mother was the one that would have went through the pregnancy, birth and eventually having to part ways. She lived with that for what 20 years? I seen the comments saying that she faced many hardships in life. So it's understandable that she wasn't able to express many emotions. Her upbringing and life must have made her suppress her emotions. People were making mnay negative comments about her being 'cold'.
What a contrast between the homes and lifestyles of Alex's biological mother and father. The scene in the dining room of his father's apartment in St. Petersburg was unreal. All those fruits on display and the abundant food, those were very expensive. Champagne in the freezing park! What a journey.
Dianne Williamson and the father is trolley driver, so works for the city. That just shows you if you have a job, any job you can have pretty good life in Russia. His mother’s lifestyle is her own fault: drinking, probably can’t hold a job. Over 12 million people live / work illegally in Russia ( mostly people from FSU) so there are plenty of jobs.
Mila Schon
Having to give away one’s baby can do GREAT damage to one’s soul....please, don’t judge her. ❤️
It's also common in Russian / Ukrainian culture to make a lot of food during meetings and celebrations for guests. Very good hospitality . My gf comes from Ukraine. . And I don't speak a word of Ukrainian or Russian. . But I found myself completely bombarded with gifts, food, and caring attitude towards me whenever I visited them.
He's a combination of both ... lovely young man - she did what was best for him & he is beautifully mature in his manner towards her on first meeting... she must've secretly been ecstatic that he came looking for her... I like her hubby ...he is friendly & kind to him... she is definitely emotional about it all... her hubby is giving her backing mentioning how young she was...which is loyal love in it's nicest form... as someone commented below, he now has THREE families.... all caring peeps...& additional siblings...
you look like your father, smile and warm personality. i hope you'll have a good life so you can help your birth mom to have a better life.
bella Rusli ...u sound SO kind... yes - am sure he will help his mom & her very welcoming hubby, Andrei ... he comes across as a caring, warm hearted young man... sure some lucky girl will marry him one day & Russian holidays will be part of scenario ... hope so... Godspeed u lovely, warmhearted peeps - restore one's faith in the belief of fellow feeling...
what a lovely young man. amazing parents, and am happy for the birth parents as well. I just loved this young man's smile throughout his interaction with his birth parents.
Alex, you're such a neat , friendly, happy person . I hope you keep in touch with each other.
Amazing you are lovely boy, you have a big HEART take care always Alex
Actually, your birth mom said that nobody asked her, when they gave you up to an orphanage, because she was not yet 18.
They say sometime around the 14th minute that it was a forced decision. (Meaning because she was a minor, they forced her to give up on her son.) - that is my understanding at least.
@@lenkapolka yes, I am a Russian speaker and I confirm that is what his birth mom Tatyana said - nobody asked her anything when her son was taken to the orphanage.
Oh please go back and spend lots of time with your mom!!! please ❤️❤️❤️
Just found out this vid. You have ur mom's face and ur dad's personality. At the end, you have 3 family who love you. Be bless always.
Hope, in the meantime you'll speak fluent Russian, visit your parents in Russia again, stay there for longer time and get to know them better. About your mom, being raised in an orphanage leaves prints, also living in a provincial russian town is no bowl of cherries too. But you saw that yourself. You're so lucky to have such nice foster parents. I'm happy for you and think that your mom is really happy for you too, seeing that you're doing well and grew out to be a kind and good young man.
Галя Безпалева But his adoptive parents , are his parents , not foster parents. He was raised by them, and he was raised with love and empathy towards his bio parents. Great kid!
I'm watching and I'm crying, and I'm thinking that's so heartbreaking sad
They didn't want to let you go. Not being able to speak the same language is very hard. You will need to learn to speak Russian. I could feel the love that you all have for each other. I pray that you all will be able to spend time together.
Mrs Pamela Stanley.
I'm adopted too. I found my biological mother a few year ago. She couldn't have contact because of her mental health. My biological father died in 2013. I found my biological brother from Ancestry DNA last year. He didn't know I existed. I found out about him at 15 years old.
That is really special that you got to do that!! I am also adopted from Russia and hope to meet my biological parents!
Never give up hope if you decide to search :)
You can see the pain on his mother face, pretty sure is no easy to see the son you put in adoption 20 years ago. He do look like his dad. I he said his dad reaction it was different, yes it was and the different is his dad "discover" he have a son, his mother was face to face with the son she knew she has a have to put it in adoption and probably was hard for her to see that she made the right decision. Is never easy to make such a decision, you not need to be a mother in order to guess it was hard for her. Obviously the father has a better economic situation than the mother, but he should try to understand the mother situation and her as a person.
Yes, for the Father, it was a joyful discovery. For the Mother, reliving a deep trauma that she surely was desperately trying to push aside and forget. You can see in her face the pain, and she hesitates to reach out and connect with her son. I have such sympathy for her.
You’re a lucky deserving young man, I hope everything is still going well for you
He was a gorgeous baby and I see why he was chosen. His smile is everything...
I crying alot during watching ur video
Aye, I'm a soggy mess.
A hearbreaking story, such a tough life for Tatiana as an orphan who then had a baby adopted with little real choice in the matter.
Such a dad and son thing to do, lift you up and tousle your hair, something I do with my son, he's 22.
This is great. I see that you have your mother's looks, gestures, and your dad's hair, and sense of humor. Also that contagious smile. :) This is so heart warming to watch. Although I don't think Russia is an ideal place to live, if you're used to living in New Zealand. I bet cha it was a culture shock! I would be. Anyway, I was always interested in the cold weather of Russia, because I'm from Canada, and I'm pretty sure that the Russian, and Canadian weather is almost the same. Hahah. okay, I'm rambling on. Anyway thanks for sharing with us your story. This is awesome. Keep on smiling Alex. :) xx
Love this and thank you for sharing.
your video when you first got to russia meeting your birthparents, you have the nicest smile i've ever seen in this whole world
You look like your dad.. happy for you Alex..
Your journey is so interesting. Your love to your parents (biological and adopters) is so genuine. Thanks for inspiring me to love my parents more and help children who would like to find their parents. - Liam from Manila, Philippines
when i met my mother she had no idea who i was so happy for you mate.
So sorry for you😭I hope you're 🆗 now❤️
I noticed that Alex's birthmother looks at Alex while he looks away, and as soon as he looks at her she looks away. :-) how cute!
Спасибо что ты есть, Алекс. Спасибо твоим чудесным родителям, которые вырастили и воспитали тебя таким хорошим человеком. Твоя улыбка согревает мое сердце. Чувствую тепло на душе. Своей улыбкой и смехом ты даришь радость людям. Оставайся таким жизнерадостным всегда. Как и твой отец Миша. Счастья, здоровья тебе и твоей семье.
Very cool to see :) I hope one day to do a similar thing if I ever get reunited with my parents.
Congrats on making it all happen and having these memories for yourself.
Oh yeah! i subbed you because i hope you will let us all know from time to time how things are going, it will be like waiting for a letter from a long time friend. Thanx!!!
His dad is amazing . Blessing to mom as well
Мне грустно смотреть на вашу биологическую маму, время тогда было очень тяжёлое. То что она жива уже чудо.
Thank you for sharing your story! You are a wonderful young man. It would be great if you could use your platform to raise awareness of how it is actually to grow up in an orphanage. Your birth mother is being questioned and attacked for her decisions and how she is, but she is simply a product of her environment. She never learned to properly bond with humans, because in an orphanage you don't get a chance to bond with people so this affects the rest of your life. She did the best she can with the cards she was dealt. Thank you for showing so much kindness towards her.
You mother did the best she could for you. You have to be pretty thankful... Visit her whenever you can and try learn some Russian. Don't judge her. Good documentary.
Its life journeys like this that break the barriers of nationhood and make us all realize we are ONE HUMAN FAMILY!!! AWESOME Alex!!!
Alex, you are a wonderful young man. I wish you will success in your life and hope your birth mum will get better
Watching him say goodbye to his birth mom and her husband was very difficult. And I'm heartbroken that her husband passed. 😞
Thank you for sharing your beautiful story
I think he should build a relationship with his mother because she seems to have had a touch life.
What a great kid. Any mother would be delighted to have you in their family. You are a great example of how to make everyone in the family feel treasured! Well done!
Beautiful ending ... second half with father... lovely peeps... fascinating meeting family members who are of a different culture...
Enjoyed this so much! I hope you have them come to New Zealand, and if so, that you please make a video of that, too!
hope you are well.ty 4 sharing,x
Your mums husband is just the sweetest guy ever ! Made me very emotional when he teared up as you left. What a sweet lovely guy and Alex at the end of the video you as a baby omg!!! Your soooo chubby and sweet
Fantastic story!
Actually very interesting. Thanks! :)
I love the bbq in the park in the cold !
Your dad is awesome!!
Happy for you Alex❤️ Thank you for parents who raised you such a good people ❤️
Such an understanding young man 💞
heart wrenching....
I love this documentary Alex. The emotional details is incredible. Loving this Alex. You are a good person, raised by your NZ parents.
Alex - this is a wonderful video of your comments on your Half siblings.
Beautiful story! 🙏💝
Amazing story.
Very touching story
Heart warming..I cried ..amazing family you have.. You're and amazing guy..
Wow.. wat a great personality you have alex . You are charming well raised . God bless you
Although my story is very different from yours, I feel very nostalgic about Russia and my extended family. I don’t have contact with anyone from my extended family apart from my Mum and brother who are still living in Russia. I’ve not spoke to my father for nearly 15 years, as he no longer wanted to know me. I’m not angry at him anymore, he has mental health difficulties and is very set in his ways. Even if I reached out again, I’m certain the will not want to reconnect. I left Russian when I was 12, and forgot all about my Russian roots and Russian traditions and culture.
And watching your videos I started to feel that I want to reconnect with and learn more about Russia, traditions and culture. You’ve been on an incredible journey, it’s been emotional to watch it. But it’s amazing to see the progress. Wishing you and all your family all the best.
What a beautiful story! I think your father wanted to saturate every moment he had with you and was the reason why you had a very cold picnic lol
I love all your stories.beautiful.
Beautiful video about reconnecting with your roots. Amazing
Алекс, я очень за тебя рада! Твои мама и папа очень хорошие. Ты так на них обоих похож! Надеюсь, у тебя будет всё хорошо. Ты тоже очень классный!
Привет из России!
Да, да. Очень хорошие. Хух...
You are such a nice guy, so open minded and understanding. You are replacing the nurturing your mother lacked in apparently a very tough life life. You are an angel and I hope you have many happy years with her. I am praying for her and all the mothers who had to make this selfless decision. You are blessed, Alex
Your story is so beautiful!
Thank you for watching! :)
Очень рад за вас. Прочитал на Медузе статью.
I love both sets of parents, your adopted mom must have done good for you to maintain that magnetic smile of yours all throughout your adult life...I really loved your birth father the best, for acknowledging and really, truly appreciating your adopted parents, that to me tells a lot, I have seen a lot of adopted children reunite, never anyone said thank you as you real dad did to your adopted parents, I believe who raised you is your real parents...that's what I truly believe in my heart... I have watched so many episodes of you on these little Clips but I never clicked to leave a message but few of them I just put like like like this is the first message I'm putting out there you're awesome thank you for all your videos that I really enjoyed even the Russian interview that lasted 50 minutes I've watched even that barely understanding...good luck to you, never forget the hand that fed you...love to all of you...you are all BLESSED....THANK YOU AGAIN FOR YOUR LIFE STORY...
I'm so happy you got to see your birth parents.
I'm happy for U
Hope you can give happiness all the time to your parents especially your mother
One of the most interesting and best documentaries I ever watched. I'm glad for you to finally find you way back home to your roots. 🙏🏽 It's a shame that New Zealand is so far away from Russia.
Love your story. Watching from philippines
❤ so heartwarming❤
You have your mum's face and Dad's personality. Your dad seems to have a good life, please take care of your Mum, she seems in need of lots of love and care. I am sure she is thinking of you e everyday after you left her. There is a certain longing in her eyes. Your attitude towards both of them was simply beautiful ❤
What a gorgeous young man you are. I felt a bit bad for you when you met your mam but I think you understood and showed great empathy and compassion that she just didn’t know how to be a mother, she had no mother herself to learn from. She was also in front of a camera which would be nerve wracking. I’m bet she is very proud of you ❤️ Your Dad is just lovely and wanted you to know how much he wanted you as his son 💙 I hope you all continue to grow your relationships.
I really wish you were able to have a better translator for the first time you met your birth parents. I understand Dmitry was doing his best and was more than just a translator to you in your journey, but there are many moments where he isn't able to translate what you're saying, or the translation is very different. There are too many dropped sentences of yours to even count, but as far as mistranslations go:
13:19 "They made a good decision to get me", this was translated to your birth mom as "Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to leave (to New Zealand)". Eek.
She then replies (to what she thinks you said) at 13:27, "Well that's how it worked out... and anyways, nobody asked me anything (about what happens to you)". But to you this was translated as "she didn't ask you". This point sort of got resolved, but what was missed is she's referencing the fact that she didn't leave you at an orphanage, but rather the hospital (and had no input in what happened after).
14:28 "I hope I didn't shock you when I was trying to find you" was translated as "he was really shocked when he finally found you and he couldn't believe that he did".
15:41 "He has the same humour as me" got translated as "he also has a sense of humor" which is awkward because it sounds like a response to her suggestion that you say hi from her.
At the end of the day, none of this really matters. The emotions, the feeling of the moment mattered a lot more. But I do hope you get to have conversations with them through a strong interpreter who is really, really fluent in both English and Russian; it could lead to another kind of discussion and intimacy with them. And I admire your undertaking to learn Russian :)
My dear Alex, you are such a brave man to take on this journey. My heart bleeds when I see you trying to please so much, trying so hard. Shall I tell you a secret of life: in the end, you are born alone and you die alone. Your very precious energy and love should be directed to healing yourself. But, even if I do not know you, so proud of you! (mother of two sons who look and act a lot like you)
What a lovely story.
What a wonderful reunion he had with his parents and what a lovely young man he is and a credit to his Kiwi family.
Living here in N Z you tend to never think about international adoptions so that was very enlightening to watch and heartwarming as well. I know one day he will get back to Russia to spend some more time with his parents and half sister hopefully when shes old enough to keep those memories. Best thing I have watched this year.
Wish it had subtitles! Your a wonderful young man.
Hello! Regarding the subtitles at the time it was very hard to understand some points. Maybe soon it will be something I will definitely work on! :) Thanks for the support!
I really wish Peter enjoyed a healthy long life.
Alex you are so cute and a very good kid. God Bless You!
Thanks Chloe!