Can you be too attached to your therapist?

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  • čas přidán 1. 09. 2021
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    Have you ever worried about becoming too attached or dependant on your therapist?
    Building a connection with your therapist is important in the healing process. But, how can be sure it doesn't get to a point that is unhelpful, or possibly even unhealthy?
    I talk about what healthy attachment might look like and its role in healing.
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Komentáře • 65

  • @PeggyOliveiraMSW

    Get your FREE Letting Go meditation (Guided Meditation)

  • @ladytube64

    The relationship with a therapist has a very fine line.

  • @Isabella-yh8ls
    @Isabella-yh8ls Před 2 lety +12

    Peggy thank you for addressing this topic. Having purposely avoided attachment and letting anyone close, ever, any feeling of trusting and any feeling of hoping a therapist cares does feel like over attachment, as it’s new and there is nothing to compare it with. The self protective drive definitely wants a written signed guarantee that there won’t be abandonment by the therapist, and at the same time can be scared witless by the idea of attachment or being cared about as that leaves the possibility open to be hurt. Does that make sense? 💕

  • @amandabiesinger4046
    @amandabiesinger4046 Před 2 lety +7

    I ran from this so called attachment with a few therapists. As soon as I started to feel any care or love for that therapist I would run because it scared me! Now learning to trust these feelings and trust my therapist I have been able to hold on to this relationship and not run. I agree, I think trust and care is necessary to be able to truly heal!

  • @kelly4770
    @kelly4770 Před 14 dny

    I crave connection and attachment, but I’m deeply fearful of it at the same time. It feels impossible to trust that someone could care about me, especially if they really know me. I don’t feel deserving of anyone’s attention or care. But, I do get attached, very much so, and then I’ll usually do something to ruin it. I wish I could navigate relationships better, especially the therapy relationship. It’s so hard and I feel so afraid.

  • @alexfromoakland2862
    @alexfromoakland2862 Před 2 lety +6

    Hi Peggy and everyone. I’m currently experiencing this. This definitely resonated with me. The first time I felt care from my therapist was when she called me “sweetie,” a normally, very endearing term. I had not ever heard growing up, I think I may have even grimaced when I heard it. It has been a difficult road in continuing the relationship and see someone model this type of care, something I never had. I am deeply afraid of developing feelings toward anyone, especially her.

  • @annabel952

    I find. It hard when the therapist doesn't answer my emails

  • @mitralize
    @mitralize Před rokem +2

    How do you tell your therapist you may be too attached to her without scaring her away? She tells me it’s ok to be attached but I don’t want to be because it’s hurting me.

  • @joyacuna-rivera5276
    @joyacuna-rivera5276 Před rokem +3

    I have a lot of childhood trauma, therefore I have trust issues. I have a wonderful therapist and I finally felt I could trust her and open up more. Then she recommends biweekly appointments, which made me feel somewhat of the abandonment fear. I don’t mind having biweekly appointments but I have so much going on all the time and so much trauma from my past that even just weekly hour sessions aren’t enough for me to let everything out. I usually feel a little worse after therapy because of me being vulnerable and ending therapy a little emotional. But I don’t know if biweekly sessions are enough. I kind of feel she’s pushing me away.

  • @janetnewman5737

    This video made me cry and my heart ache. My therapist, I don’t think can ever do enough for me. I still will worry worry worry. She tells me that she is in this with me for the long haul. She gives me her time, 2 times a week for a solid hour. There’s not anyone that I can trust except her. I worry that I am too needy, that I am taking too long. She told me that therapy takes a long time sometimes. It’s been 2.5 years and much of that time has been 2 times a week. Thank you for this video, you truly tried to tell us to trust and to feel safe leaning on our therapist…but it doesn’t matter. I still worry about her leaving me all alone like a small child. But this was a very good video.

  • @stephencaudill2422
    @stephencaudill2422 Před 28 dny

    I tell my patients we're gonna work together for 3 to 6 months, in the last month we plan for the final session. However they can come back on a monthly basis for any maintenance therapy

  • @sunnative818

    I’m really glad I found your video. I’m dealing with trying to be excepting of being attached and that it is OK. for me, my abandonment issues are the holy Grail of my journey. I truly believe I found the right therapist to help me with this. Especially after seeing your video.🦋🙏

  • @dianeluck8355
    @dianeluck8355 Před 2 lety +4

    Hi Peggy

  • @denisf.1744
    @denisf.1744 Před 2 lety

    Hi Precious Peggy,i could relate too all that your talking about which i found happening with every therapist that i was assigned to,and i don’t know why but i just always thought it was normal,and i was okay with it all,thanks for the videos,lovin’it,love Denny😘🙏🦋

  • @sasshleysays5922
    @sasshleysays5922 Před rokem +1

    I think this video was made specifically for me :P Thank you for affirming and validating the fears involved in this. I really like how you brought in the importance of the relationship for those specifically who have experienced relational trauma. And all the things (hyper-dependent, afraid of abandonment, pushing away, doing something to rupture the relationship) were so spot on! I needed this, this week- so thank you!

  • @brianh1969
    @brianh1969 Před 2 lety +1

    Have been working with a fantastic trauma therapist. Have had concerns about attachment and connection yet have recognized the healing. Recent trigger & I pushed away hard. Ultimately, abandonment was at the root. Good now. This video was definitely helpful. ☮️

  • @barbaramulhall9470
    @barbaramulhall9470 Před 2 lety +2

    Great video...😊❤

  • @denisf.1744

    I could relate to this video with all your talking about with a therapist certified as a professional,and all went better than I expected with this last one only ending up with her leaving,and then I didn’t continue any more ,and I got sad feelings because it was much better than I thought it would be as she would initiate it all and i found it turned into connection which I didn’t mind at all as it was a release of what was needed,and wished it would have continued 🙏Namaste 😇❤️😑

  • @klear1440

    Hi, this hits home with me as I tend to be attached to my therapist too much and then when they end it I am devastated. I have had childhood trauma and abandonment issues and crave that attention and feeling like someone cares. I’m having a hard time even finding a therapist right now. I appreciate these videos you are sharing

  • @denisf.1744
    @denisf.1744 Před rokem

    i could relate to all your talking about,and i wish i saw this video at time when i was with these therapists it might have been different for me to be more open with her,and probably been able to help me more,and might of been able to practice as is said,and if she could have initiated it more