3 Reasons Your Kid Won't Follow Directions
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- čas přidán 28. 06. 2024
- This is the topic I’ve been asked the MOST to share more about. In this video I explain the mistakes getting in the way of your kid actually following your directions, and show you how to give directions the right way.
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Video Timestamps:
00:00 Intro
00:56 Mistake 1
02:56 Mistake 2
04:25 Mistake 3
05:48 Solution & Takeaways
I came back to comment because I was skeptical that the advice you gave in the video would work. I definitely thought I was already giving clear directions, but I was actually making statements. Over the last week, I’ve been giving clear, timestamped directions in a firm voice and it’s been effective at least 95% of the time. Thank you!
Way to go! Thanks for coming back to share. I'm proud of both of you.
Do I have kids? No. Am I paying attention to this advice like I have 10 kids? Absolutely 😂😅
Same!
For leaving the park, I give a pre-talk. We will be here for 1 hour. Then I tell them 30 > 15 > 10 > 5 > 1 min left. Give them one last chance to go down the slide and then it's time to go. Hold their hand and redirect them to getting enthusiastic about the next activity, usually lunch or snack time. Also, actively play with them if there's no other kids their age.
Now for vegetables, I believe it's important to have them try a little of everything. They don't have to finish it. If you left it up to them, you'd have kids that just refuse to eat vegetables all together. I know several grown men like this. Sometimes it helps to go back to the drawing board on how a vegetable is cooked/presented. Seasoned and roasted is often tastier than boiled or even steamed. And sometimes you can "hide" pureed veggies in other dishes, especially ones with sauces. Get creative.
Exactly. You are completely doing the right thing. Good mumma. Wish more were like you.
1. For moving from a preferred activity to a less preferred one I give a 2 minute warning.
2. In my videos you can see my barely 2 year old sounding out "cat". He previously did it independently & surprised us so we've continued doing it with mastered letters!
I've decided that part of your effectiveness with kids is your bright engaging eyes. Great Vid! I got this tip from one of your shorts - make both decisions result in the outcome you want - thank you!
I got the shit beat out of me a few times and then I’d learn whatever my parents wanted me to learn. So doing it a different way feels like I’m walking around blind. So grateful to have this lesson here. I’ll try on the playground tomorrow! 😅
Good job breaking that cycle!
Right here with you!
Omg this works!! 😮😮😮 the key thing I keep forgetting is getting to eye level and touching my tiny toddragon. When I do that, it works like magic! Thank you so much! ❤❤❤
😂😢😂
😂😅😅😂😂😂
Thank you! More examples of “how and what to do”, please. I feel one is not enough. There are different situations that require different words.
I don’t have any kids and im not a teacher but i still want to learn these things because i think its important to know this stuff. Sometimes i am put in charge of children and i have no idea how to get them to do stuff they aren’t interested in. Don’t want the lids to learn that im the pushover adult that lets them do whatever. Thanks for your tips! They are very helpful!
I just want to thank you for these videos. When I was a 1st time mom I had no one to helped so I reached out to parent classes books and even when I was breast feeding I joined support groups to learn. I am a person who doesn't want to follow how I was raised which was a very bad abusive emotional and physical childhood. Do I try my best for my kids. I always feel "what can I do better, what am I doing wrong" so learning more is so helpful especially in Non judgement areas. I've been told "oh your kids are spoiled you should spank" nope I don't believe in that nor do I yell. I teach them to express and use words so I can raise children that know to communicate. So watching your teaching videos are so helpful I thank you!!!
Excellent video!!
We had a brilliant part-time nanny for one of my kids for a time and she taught me a fantastic tip. Give them heads up: we have 5 minutes then we will... . When times comes tell them it's time to ... And then count them off: I'm going to count to 3 and you will get into the car/put shoes on/ go brush your teeth. Then you count loudly and slowly.
I don't know what magic happens but kids start moving and doing and usually get whatever it is done by 2.
If they get to 3 (that's so extremely rate that I only remember it happening twice) you say - you lose. :) at which point they scramble to finish even faster.
Of course when they finish before the count is out - you have to say WELL DONE! i don't know how but this works.
The main trick is to keep it positive! It's a fun drill, there's nothing impressive about it and there's never a punishment. It's a little hurry up magic tip.
Thanks for sharing
This is great, how do I stop yelling tho 🤣🤣🤣
😂
🤣🤣🤣
That part
Right!!!!
True story …. Ugh
Well done, yet again!! It is never too late to start giving clear directions and children will respond, although they may try to get you to be more flexible, stand your ground. I believe getting anyone to follow your directions begins with your mind set. If you have the attitude that you expect your directions to be listened to and followed they usually are. The sooner you establish who is in charge the better and it makes for a more positive relationship with your children. You don't need to be mean, just firm.
😂 When I was 19, I learned how to receive directions at Marine Corps boot camp. In grammatical context, I believe it’s called the imperative mood?
It is. Commands start with a verb. "Open your books to page 12." etc. Advertisers use it every day.
Thanks for the examples. I didn’t know what clear directions meant. I’ll try that.
Thanks! My son is in a “hold on” phase, I hope this helps me 👍🏼🙏🏼
😂😂😂 "Hold on mom" "You got about 12.5 seconds to change that hold on into a yes ma'am"
Haha yeeeea so is my almost 4 year old daughter! Like “ok hold on I’m just doing something right now…”
I give her a second and then I remind her of what she has been gently instructed to do :) she used to try to milk it but I simply explained she was being disrespectful and explained what disrespect is and so on… we live by God’s Word so she quickly reconsidered her poor decisions 🙌🏽
Lol my son will be three next month and he always says give me one second Momma or one second Dad
This is Awesome! Thank you
Great help, thanks for the video
Thank yyou.
Thank you! I have been able to use your methods to help my children. My toddler has such a strong personality with big emotions, I plan to try this technique with him.
Me tooo
Thank you, agree
Thank you so much for this video.
Totally agree--excellent advice
Thank you for your contact I will practice this with my kids starting tomorrow🕊️❤️☀️
Great video!
Excellent!!
You are AMAZING!!!
I'm grateful for videos, I sent them to my son and daughter in-laws . Blessings on your success ❤
Thanks for sharing, appreciate the support!
You're a good teacher, this is exactly the way to go. I've been giving directions ever since I first heard about it a few years ago, and let me tell you, it works (like mostly) 😅 There will be days when my kids are but nah, I don't want to, I'll explain them why it has to be and what the (actual !!!!) consequences are when they don't do it. at the latest it works out then. Like for example: If you don't wear a jacket you're probably gonna get cold. The bonus is, my kids know I am reliable. I hope this stays that way for a long long time ☺ I can't wait for puberty when probably everything will go downhill 🤣
😂 it’s my fear as well 😢
Hi can u make a video on defiant children and what strategies we can use as parents.
Thanks for this video
Those dinosaurs crack me up 😂😂
I'm still working on being a parent... I have a tod and now a newborn 🤦♀️. I always catch myself asking questions... Then i have to rephrase my commands.
This guys just great !
Good job dear friend
Stay blessed and keep sharing ♥️🥰💚😍
Many love and success
This is so good!!
This is great! Thank you for sharing! I saw a clip of you using sound cards/blending, do you have a suggestion on a product? I have a young toddler I would like to get started with teaching how to read but there are so many products out there. Thank you in advance! ❤
Super vidéo 👍🏼 les enfants fonctionnent pareil dans le monde entier.
I'll try and see how it goes
Thank you for this, exactly what I needed to learn! Question, how does this work when you are trying to get your kid to stop doing something you don't want them to do, rather than directing them to do something you do? Looking forward to learning more from you ✌️
Makes sense
I will try this today. But im sure this should work.
I don't ask. "Alright lets go" they follow now they may say mommy we not ready to go, however they are getting their butts in the car I dont do fits😂🤨
If they don't listen, or they pitch a fit, how do you handle that?
What makes them feel compelled to listen to you?
Asking because I spend time watching my nieces and nephew and 2 of them don't listen.
Me: "I think it's time to go now..."
My 4yr old: "No, I think I want to stay here."
Me: 👁👄👁
😢 thank you
I love this guy so much, thank you!! I’m definitely more a statement parent.
While I disagree with the "finish your broccoli" statement, Dude you need to go on a Nationwide Campaign spreading these truths to parents everywhere.❤
Does this work at all ages?
5:22 lololols literally! Kiddos looking at me like “mmmk…” then take off running
It’s been a journey indeed!
This is the best parenting video ever! Could be improved with more examples, btw...
Back in the 90s, my mom used the Chancleta strategy" to get me to listen. And guess what, I did. 😂 still a mommas boy too, haha
my toddlers used to follow directions because I was really good at getting them to do what they had to do
Do you have advice for teenagers though? Because they don't listen to me at all now that they are grown up hahahaha it is a constant battle, they are way worse than toddlers
I really need help with feeding my child he won’t eat, please refer to a video that may help
Have you tried making protein smoothies?? Thats what I had to do for 1 of my toddlers
Eventually they will eat. Please don't push food. I was nice and thin. Dr told parents to give me milk shake and I became overweight.
Give them healthy food and eventually they eat. Don't substitute junk food
Made them super yummy, peanut butter and jelly(dates) tasting, chocolate cherry, etc. They all (4 kids) enjoyed drinking them and I didn't have to worry about fruit veggies or protein intake
Do not listen to people who say eventually your child will eat! You never should do the wait and see approach there are so many good pages on Instagram with great tips! The mini me dietitian she’s great! And then explore early intervention as well it’s free for all kids 3 and under maybe even older than 3 depending on where you live ☺️☺️ my child went through this and I trusted my gut instead of listening to people say one day he will eat, now he has a waaay better relationship with food! You got this mama💖💖
I've found my boys eat more when they help me cook or they pick a recipe from YT to cook. I think they like being involved in the process.
Hello, I did all of this when my child was younger but what about when they listened before and now they are 10 years old and say no =(
Is it too late to try this on my 15 year old? 😩
Dwl...for a 15 year old if I saw let's go and they fuss, I would just leave them at the play ground 😂 with busfare.
@@hopalmorrgen3206 😂😂😂😂
Why is telling your kid to finish their broccoli inappropriate? Honnest question.
Seconding this question. Getting used to eating well, varied, and what is served is "important" I think. Is it not worthy of direction, then? If not, why? A suggestion in our home typically leads to, "hmm, no, I'd rather have ice cream".
It’s not.
Because you’re being demanding when you need to understand even though they are kids they are human and they may not like broccoli and have preferences, how would you like to be told to eat something you don’t like? It’s all about learning your child and giving them options to try other things they might enjoy. Also not only does it sound demanding and forceful but that’s not going to give you any results because you’re asking them to do something you know you’re going to fail simply because you do not understand your child.
nothing's wrong with it, people just don't want to put in the effort. My mum made us it Brussels sprouts. it was the grosses thing ever to me as a kid. But she showed us how to eat it quickly, or mix it with food we did like, drink it down with water, Or she turned it into a competition game between me and my brothers. She understood eating vegetables is important for growing bodies. So she made sure we ate them, and a variety of vegetables, not just the ones we liked. Now as a adult I'm not a fussy eater, I can go to anyone's house and eat whatever they serve. I'm glad my mum made the effort.
Well. I have a 10-month-old. Puppy disobeying me on a daily basis. I need help, please.
My 3 year old doesn't want to eat food she refuse it and cry and run away how do I get her to eat
Back in Asia my mother would slap me and drag me through the dirt to take me home. And guess what next time she says time to go home I go home. 😂 no questions asked no suggestions made, I love her she loves me.
Yeah sounds about right 9 in 10 kids report CA in some Asian counties 😂😂😂
@@Yomommasboyfriendsonsource?
@@Yomommasboyfriendson there is no reporting CA no such concept 🤣 its the culture it’s heritage. Respecting elders is its cornerstone.
@@Yomommasboyfriendson on the contrary 9/10 kids are well behaved and well mannered. They remember the shoes sandals and belts which they ate in childhood.
@@Yomommasboyfriendsonraising respectful adults who understand boundaries and consequences is not CA. It's actually good parenting
Hello I have a beautiful daughter who is 10 years old she cannot read fluently please I am reaching out out to you for some help she has a tutor but she cannot fluently read she makes the correct sounds to the letters however she does not blend and put the letters together to make a word she is going into 4th grade and I need her to be able to read before the summer is over is there any suggestions that you have I am open for anything please help me desperate desperate mom I had them hold her back in the first grade cuz I knew something was wrong then since then I have been begging her teachers for more guidance and I have been getting zilch in help fourth grade is a very pivotal year in your educational jourday I know this because number one I had the same issues when she was little I failed 4th grade however I didn't have anybody to advocate for me or be my voice she does I have her a tutor that all I can afford is for her to come one hour a day three times a week I am trying to get grants to put her in private school but I need her to be able to read before school starts
Hi there, I recommend assessing her skills and then learning how to teach those skills at home. I have lots of resources to help you to help her here: www.toddlersread.com/
This work not only with kids but with your spouse
Yes but what about this kids that hate control, even hate to be a child because he feels parents or teachers are controlling all his life and he can't be himself. He has options but some kiddos question everything, don't like to be followers and and not easy going in a way that they want to be them.
My 6yo won't listen to his teachers!!! It makes me sad because he's a wonderful kid
DO I NEED TO FOLLOW DIRECTIONS??? NO! WELL FINE THEN YOU NEED TO FOLLOW DEEZ NUTS
This didn’t help me because I’ll say “let’s go now” and sometimes it takes them a minute and I’ll have to repeat myself… what to do when they are hardheaded. I’m tired of threatening them with a spanking! I’m tired of it! I just want them to listen to me because I’m their mom.
I have 3yrs baby girl she always use no even if we give her directions 😒
Did he just say, telling your kid, "eat your broccoli," is wrong?!
1. he
2. bad
3. asl
😆
Is it just me or does anyone else get annoyed when people pronounce frustrated without the r after the f?
Yes its so fustrating!😅