Why Walking Away From Men ALWAYS Works
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- čas přidán 11. 09. 2024
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Thanks Jonathan. A great video. I needed to hear this. I had a place holder for a year and I walked away. I deserve so much better.❤
Your opinions come at a most appropriate time. Why walking away from men is very important not only for the purpose of attraction but an all out course on how not to get scammed.
Word to the wise even attractive wholesome chats with so called doctors could lead one down the path of heart breaking love conversations. There are middle of the night what appear to be automatic love messages that lure the lonely hearted to accept their attraction whims to be told they are overseas. Then to have them request money to bring them back to the states. Beware then there are a series of calls from remote areas of the country and even other countries with foreign area codes like Nigeria that will follow up if you do not send money. Making the recipient feel guilty from not rescuing the lovers from their foreign situation. Please di not be fooled into thinking these are real lovers who will appear. They will ask the 😢tearful waiting desperate person to send money cash via Federal express leaving no track of who will receive the money all under the guise of being abroad on a special government mission. One has to be strong emotionally to avoid the romantic lure. Your financial future could be in jeopardy and never reveal cellular accounts or any account that could lead to future ruin.
Thank you for this forum. Please alert the men or women who are in desperation seeking Mr. Right. Even the most sophisticated looking face could scam you.😢
I walked away immediately after.
The first encounter.
It is the only encounter. Because I set this boundary for myself no friends with benefits. I have suggested your rules for dating. the ball is in his court. My self respect and love are in tact
You are so right Jonathon....shame on the person who uses another human being as a place holder before they meet the right one. More than likely they will be treated in the same way when they think they have met the "right one". No one should be taken advantage of.
Yes, I agree
Agree. Discernment and intentionality.
Karma always has an address.
There are always consequences and payback.
I'm no man's placeholder, option or back up plan. Keep your standards high and never settle for anything less than you deserve ladies. 👍
Manipulators don't like standards and boundaries. A backbone and a bs detector. It weeds them out.
These boots are made for walking. Treat men exactly like they treat you.
It's raining great healed evolved and empowered men!
I just went through this and had to walk away. I was definitely a place holder but fortunately found out early on. The worst part is their denial. You have to have self love and walk away without worrying about closure; which can be difficult. I’m still fairly new to dating and am wondering if anyone has any tips for keeping your energy and enthusiasm for dating up? I consider myself an outgoing/social people person, but it can be overwhelming if I start over thinking about how many people you might have to start from scratch with. I was with my ex-husband 30 years so needless to say its changed since I was 18.
A significant relationship has NO ambiguity! Yes! But, every time I pull back, he comes back stronger… ??? He wants me to move in with him, and I’m not 100% sure…
@@lanapalij4014 to me back and forth in a relationship is not a good sign
I was flat on my back, sick as a dog, and running a temperature for four days. He knew and he did nothing. I called him a jerk for letting me down when I was at my weakest and most in need. I informed he that we were done because I cannot accept that in a partner. Fair weather friends do not qualify as lovers.
I’m sorry you felt that that crappy! Did you ask him for something specific to help you were he ignored your request?
It happened to me, too. Didn't even offer me a glass of water. I thought if I needed him, he would come through for me. Total fail. We broke up. Best day of my life as hard as it was to have loved him with all my heart and gave until I was just a shell of myself as he took, took, took, and didn't invest or give back. Thinking he just wasn't ready. Well he didn't have it in him to be a giver and reciprocate in a relationship. Total waste of time. He doesn't have healthy relationship, conflict, and communication skills. One healthy and invested partner is not enough to make it work. It's exhausting and unfullfiling and mostly a waste of time.
I not feel well, they not care, I left-no contact.
Told by them, not to take their words personally. I take their actions of not caring, personally. Still follow, when someone tells you who they are, believe them. Non-caring people are not that ‘special’ and a waste of my precious time.
Good points. Ladies.
Time is our most valuable resource.
Embrace aging! You are beautiful as you are!
Older, experienced women are harder to manipulate.
That sucks
Took your advice over 5mos ago and left a guy who led me on for FOUR YEARS. NO regrets!! I’m now in a healthy, happy, juicy relationship where we both value each other and are all in. We asked the hard questions early on and he answers every question I ask and without hesitation. Your advice ROCKS!! 🥳🥳🙏🏻🙏🏻
WooHoo... great
Juicy relationship? Oranges and watermelon are juicy. Gossip stories are juicy. Not relationships.
👍 Maribeth
I walked away. Hoping one day the right person will come my way.
Match the other person’s energy and you will save yourself a lot of headaches and heartaches. Women tend to overgive. Don’t. Be thoughtful, be kind and have good manners, but don’t go all in until the “discussions” happen that Jonathon teaches us in every video. It’s that simple.
P.S. Thank you, Jonathon, for all you do for us! Also, I may be in the minority, but I appreciate the “f” word that flies out on occasion. It’s part of who you are and I miss it.
I don’t see how energy can ever increase. If both people are just matching energies then both are afraid to put in anymore.
Before this fabulous talk I have decided to walk. Not to hurt him. I’ll be a lady. But I am moving on.
👍🏼
5:58 The ONLY way to find the right person is to walk away from the wrong person. When we undervalue ourselves we try so hard to fix *the person* instead of realizing relationships can be improved but people can only make developments in *themselves* if they want to.
Exactly
Marriage takes work too, regardless if you have been married for 1 year, or 30 years. 💯 Communication really is key. I've been married twice, and my second marriage was much better, because I know it takes change from within, to see results outside of yourself. ❤
Indeed
Marriage does not take work. Getting along should be organic.
All relationships require work. Maintenance.
@@sherriflemming3218Effort, not “work”.
I love the analogy! Would I invest with 75% chance of failure?? Heck no! But in relationships we often cling to the thought that things will get better even when there is little sign of this happening. Thank you J.
People don't want to be alone, so they settle, that can even be marriage as a placeholder.....yikes.
I am a grower and the builder and I'm having difficulty finding people of the same mindset
My red flags: I’m a martyr.. I want to do everything then get upset when no one does the same… I’m insecure about my body and health. I’m insecure about my lack of academic achievements.
I’m in a holding situation with a “nice” guy. 😮 He is slowly looses his intentionality. The fog is lifting because you are putting a definition of what is happening. Time for me to walk! Thanks for the insight.
@@lindahahn1823 in the same situation. Ugh! Things were going good, he was being consistent but wanted to move faster than I was comfortable with and now I'm getting bread crumbs - he still reaches out to me, not like he was- he's a decent guy but Im feeling like a place holder- why am I doing this?
I had to walk away for the first time ever. i didnt even want to do it but knew i had to. It hurts. Im disgusted with the person now. Everything i thought I knew was a complete lie. Everything.
Thank you Johnathan , I am a sixty something Uber driver , I am glad. You are putting out healthy relationship advice ... I often hear from riders how difficult it is for young people to have relationships today in American society...social media and hook up apps have twisted expectations in relationship dynamics ...thank you for sound advice and really good book suggestions ...I really enjoy your videos
Always fall for the wrong ones. I know better. It happens anyways. My huge red flag is my severe trust issues. Even with my Ex Hubby I never took his name because in the back of my mind I knew it wasn't going to work out. I always wait for the bottom to fall out, whether platonic or romantic. I got this way from childhood trauma. No one can ever tell you what they really think or feel. They play games and then once they've totally got you outta your mind they gaslight you and act like you're crazy. This is why I now keep to myself and don't date. Only I can truly love myself and keep it real with myself. I might get lonely but at least I'm not getting used and hurt.
That must be a hard way to live... 🙏
@@JonathonAslay sometimes. I go to Counseling to work on my trust issues but I know if there is a right person out there for me, I have work to do and eventually he'll come along.
Thank you Jonathan for sharing this. It speaks true Ive been too kind and give too much. Yet for near 5 years and he won’t even move in with me. Acts like my husband, always at my house yet leaves 5 days a week to go back to his house to sleep to wake up for work and come back to my house. He’s not deep, gets angry over my questions over our future. I know I need to walk away but my self confidence is blown. I feel so used by he won’t let me go. It’s so hard when he has good traits where he’s loyal, something I never had. But I want more and he obviously is wasting my time.
You did amazing, thank you for this. I’m sorry about your son ❤
You are so right, Johnathan. I had done this but I've done the work on myself to where I know and feel my worth as a woman. I finally can say I love myself and am happy with where I am in my life. Woohoo!🎉
Jonathon, I have to say, I think your estimation of growers/builders at 20% is highly optimistic. I think these people are unicorns, especially in the middle age demographic. This is so much work, so many broken people to sift through, so frustrating. I believe in kindness, but this whole process is exhausting. I was actually relieved when my last guy just ghosted me for the 3rd date. I am perfectly happy on my own. Open to a relationship l, but only with a grown up who adds value to my life (and whose life I would also add value to). Dating is like a part time job!
Indeed
Great advice Jonathon. I live day by day engraving in my mind and soul everything you said. It’s hard to spot the difference between the builder vs the spender/transactional types. I had the courage to step out from that hot seat a couple of years ago. We are always learning. Two years of self knowledge,self love and introspection is being so powerful. We can only share what we have. Appreciating kindness,honesty, generosity and deep respect needs to be mutual.
Love that!
Thank you Johnathon!
Good advice. I seem to attach myself to soon...cause I crave the affectionate side of a relationship. But also the acceptance of just being myself...wanting someone to share my life with.
How does one just relax and just let happen what happens? I'm a good catch with a heart of gold.
I spent to long with a controlling partner/ narcissistic person.
I did the Hoffman Process 6 years ago and I highly recommend it for anyone and everyone!! 🥰
Me too, 6 years ago in August. What about you?
Thank you, I hope it’s affordable for me…
@@JonathonAslay I went at the end of July in Connecticut. And planning on gifting this experience to my 2 boys when they graduate from college. Thought it would be a great way to start their next chapter in life. ☺️
What is meant by loving myself. I embarrassed myself by visiting my ex and he wouldn’t answer the door although he was home. It’s extremely hard for me after breaking up after 11 years.
Place holding would hold you back from personal growth in being a better person to attract a better person. Otherwise, to stay in place holding/wrong person relationship, you continue being the same/worse or inauthentic to self/them.
Love your comment I will walk away from the wrong person to be with the right person ❤
I'm only 13 minutes in to watching your video. I really like what you just said about kind people are usually very appreciative people. The only problem is sometimes kind. People attract unkind people negative. People are attracted to positive people. I have had to leave many situations where people were not putting in the effort necessary to sustain a healthy relationship.
I just love watching your program I have spoken to you about my situation and am struggling to accept your advice which makes sense. It’s difficult but continue to think about our good times and really not concentrating on the bad. I’m older 73 he was my best friend I miss the good parts of him. I need to let go. Difficult for me to do😞
Yes you do...
So sorry you are going through this. I am also 73 and in a relationship. I have given it my all in. There are issues with family and he. I'm doing the best I can to move ahead. Sometimes I think being in a relationship is harder than being married.j
It's hard to finally do but I did it Two years ago and it was so Hard to do. Do I miss him? Yes. And the memories. Yes. I wish I could talk to him each day. But I don't. We made amends so the hurt is gone. I haven't found anyone that I have the same things in common with or chemistry with like him. I pray for him each night to get better.over the addiction to the depression pills he takes. That's mood changers for sure. Side effects from it. Do I still have hope if he did get clean we could try again? Yes. But I know it's not likely. Maybe it's just the memories. Maybe it's feeling lonely. Who knows your heart feels like it does.
Good for you
I wholeheartedly needed to hear this. Thank you so much for sharing this. 😊
Glad it was helpful!
Giggled, I remember asking my big brother for advice, so many years ago, he had no idea. You can be my big brother!
Deal👍🏼
I love these Lives! This and a couple of other content creators are all the mental exercise I need every week. I am trying out your advise in real time. ❤
Awe... thank you 😊
Take a woman on vacation after 30 days? Where are these men?
Lots of places
just what i needed today. thanks so much. yes its all about intention.
Wonderful!
What's important in a relationship:
1. Connection and chemistry
2. Kindness, being a giver, generous, appreciative (not focused on what can I get, focused on physical attributes, being entitled)
3. Leaning into making more effort in the relationship. Invest and test, like a ping pong game.
4. Seeing people in a variety of circumstances.
5. Intention - why are we doing this?
Great points! My boyfriend was missing #2. That was enough to make the relationship tank. And emotional maturity was missing. I think they're related: having difficulty being empathetic and not being emotional mature go hand in hand.
You are brilliant & validate I’ve grown so much & spiritually centered when it comes to romantic relations. Divorced, 55 & happily single until an emotionally grown, stable & spiritually align man shows up. Txs 👍🏻
I would add that Growers and Builders are AUTHENTIC..it just seems that there are less people that have their act together as a balanced, healthy, uplifting human being...and that's what Authentic People are...many people are stuck! I know you're helping loads of people.👍💜
A man said in an interview with a meditation coach: about how meditation changed his performance in sports and in life.
"I used my aggressive physical power in sport because I thought it would make me a better athlete,
but I realized (after practicing meditation) that it was not the power I needed, to be a better athlete but the better rhythm."
"When you fall in love with the process, everything you experience is just a flow
and flow is the most beautiful thing I experienced in my life."
Maybe the same philosophy can be applied to relationships when people start new relationships or rebuild old relationships.
Go with the flow of love.
Creating momentum, not just with jobs, hobbies but also with relationships.
It's not using more power but better rhythm.
Even though some coaches say that all men care only about sex, and nothing else but sex and pleasure coming from their hormones etc,
maybe what men and women really want is the flow. and momentum, in the moments when their hormones dont dictate their lifestyle, but hormones of love and joy, oxytocin serotonin and other hormones help them to feel the energy of love.
Indeed
Ladies, men aren’t only about sex! They are human first. They have different hormones and brains though, so we have to accept and understand that they’re different. I don’t get the posts that say every man they meet tells them they want to have sex immediately. I dated A LOT and never had that happen. A man joking about sex or making a comment about it isn’t sex! Men are looking for a cool girl who understands a how men work and aren’t hostile against men.
Yes, those are grown up men.
I hope you are correct, but I highly doubt it
Poor Jamison. I'm glad you kept going with him....funny thing is he sounds like deep down he wants the actual intentional relationship. Seemed like he was actually 'searching' even though he was tossing out several negative comments...I also benefitted from your responses to Jamison. I hope he leaned in on your coaching to him... (sorry I couldn't help but comment on Jamison's dialogue) ❤
I have been a placeholder many times, NO MORE
Every person should really take a human development class. The fact that monogamy is looked at as a bad. Relationships as you age rely on the security that monogamy provides. Your advise is great.
Awe... thank you
I 💯% AGREE WITH YOU - I DISLIKE THE SAYING "YOU COMPLETE ME" OR "MY OTHER HALF" - BECAUSE THE 1ST SHOULD BE MORE LIKE "YOU ARE MY SOULMATE" (& THIS BECAUSE HOPEFULLY OUR "HEARTS & SOULS" & THE THINGS WE CARE ABOUT & HAVE MUCH EMPATHY FOR & TOWARDS HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON) - & THE 2ND STATEMENT SHOULD BE MORE LIKE - THIS IS "MY PARTNER IN CRIME" , LOL , TO BE IN EFFECT SAYING "THIS IS MY SOULMATE FOR LIFE" - IF I CONNECT WITH SOMEONE ON THIS LEVEL I AM AUTOMATICLY ATTRACTED TO THEM , & IF I DONT - THEN I SIMPLY DONT & WONT DESIRE THEIR COMPANY AT ALL !!!!
& P.S. I DONT HAVE ANY DUCT TAPE ON MY MOUTH , EVER - LMAO
Before a date, my last significant other always cleaned his car, and paid the bill. He wouldn't even allow me to take care of the tip. In turn, I always went all out making myself look beautiful. He was beaming when I turned heads as we entered the venue. A perfect give and take! I would never date a miserly guy!
Yes, don't date broke, cheap or miserly men.
What happened to this relationship?
@@JonathonAslay He passed away
@@JonathonAslay Hi Jonathon! I wanted to add one more thought: To go from average to glamorous takes planning, time and money. When I go out with my girlfriends, I am fine looking average. I won't get a second glance from anybody, I believe. For my man I put in the effort! By the way, you have a beautiful girlfriend. Treat her well and she will find ways to make you happy in return. Good luck to both of you.
When should you have sex… 51:15
C.A.R.E.S
C= when you are comfortable/trust
A= aware of the consequences (they could leave after one time)
R= what are real intentions? Is it a hook up? Situationship? Or wanting commitment learn their real intentions
E= exclusive (monogamy exclusivity , if having sex more than once )
S= safety (when there’s emotional and physical safety (including no STD/I’s)
Thank you for being there🙏🏽 I will make an appointment with you to chat but am afraid of realistic answers but do need realistic and solid advice. I’ll get in touch with you soon😵💫
Will do... Www.jonathonaslay.com/coaching
This is amazing !!!! You are so intuitive I just spent six months with a spender he warned me at the beginning but I fell in love with him and he still wants to see other people We got along great and I don’t think he was expecting to meet somebody that he liked so quickly after his divorce…I fell in love I had to walk away last weekend I couldn’t imagine him with someone else Even though he was honest and told me he wanted to date other people he hadn’t up until that point and he promised he would tell me but as time went on that’s not what I wanted I couldn’t even imagine him being with someone else and me being OK with that so I had to leave I’m crushed but I would’ve been even more crushed if I stayed
You did the right thing for yourself Lynn. 🫂
Hi Jonathan! There's a guy I had a strong connection with and we talked a few times for hours. I never saw him in person because he began to flake away. I then de-friended him from Facebook due to the flaking. Four years later he requested my friendship again. I never stopped thinking about him. After he said hi and asked how I was, he asked me to let him know when I will be in town so we can see each other (my family lived near him). I proceeded to try sparking a conversation online like normal, however, he was basically just responding to my questions or statements. There was no effort on his part. He then began posting weird memes regarding how he's done proving himself to people and that everybody always has something negative to say about him. I asked him what was wrong and all he said was that was better now and didn't elaborate. He doesn't reach out to me unless I say something. I'm not going to tell him when I'm in town because he's not making any effort. I have no idea why this is happening. He just should have left me alone! What is going on here?
He's not into, but he likes it that you're into him.
@@JonathonAslay I guess you're right! If I delete him again, it will actually be the third time lol. I feel like telling him off but I need to keep myself glued together and walk away with dignity.
@@suziequesbiznessYou can do both.
I strongly agree with you. I can’t ever imagine a place holder.0. Why not be real?
I want someone who wants to have the same as I want. ( Long lasting commitment leading to marriage. I enjoy
listing to you!!
Thank you for your reply. We plan to marry soon as is possible.
Jonathan, your talks are next level!!! I enjoy each and everyone of them... all the way from South Africa
I know in my recent responses, I have seemed .. hmmm, not positive here, but I actually am. It just seems like dating shouldn’t be so difficult and when you meet someone, and believe me, I have met many men in my previous profession.. Very upstanding Men, actually great people, but very few, something just clicks with a few, it’s interesting to me… Funny thing while raising my daughter. Told her while she was dating, now 39, happily married and has my only Grandchild.. 2and a half, told her.. never marry a man you wouldn’t be willing to push in a wheelchair, you never know what tomorrow will bring, because that is real commitment and love❤️She listened.. wish you all the best and sometimes watching you, my heart hurts for you because I see an outstanding man that really cares about people, ok, enough with my rant.. keep doing you brother!👍
What makes humans believe it should be easy... it's the most important decision in a person's life 🙏
@@JonathonAslay Agree, just a peaceful process, and I think we all know when something is off.. I do, not either persons fault, I never blame a relationship ending, it just is what it is.. and not the end all to finding your own peace, the most important thing in life to me🙏
If a guy asks me out on a date- He’s paying! And YES, makeup, clothes, hair, nails, shoes, etc costs waay more $ than what men do to groom!
.
Self love is a wonderful thing
Interesting to hear travel is your childhood wound. Travel is easy for me. Mine is cleaning. I can clean once I get going but getting started is rough. My Mother yelled about cleaning so much duringmy childhood. When I was an adult she told me her father killed her Mother when she was 6 years old. She told herself that her mother left because she was too messy. My Mother had a lot of bad childhood experiences. We never know what is behind what people do.
Walking aways works because it's a signal that you are no longer playing the game and staying in there would only add to the present pain and anxiety. From the other person's point of view, your walking away makes you weak and vulnerable
and most importantly, the other guy has lost control. If they want to kiss and make up, it's too late for that because you've gone off to greener pastures, off the reservation.
This is on point! I value your video and shared it to a friend too.
Never thought of it as a “ placeholder “
Great eye opening - don’t want to stall my man whom I’ve been manifesting ( far too long now but i trust him to show up )!!! ❤
Yes this world is full of people that need something from another - being kind is soo important- I’m going out with a guy and we both appreciate each other - it takes an age to get to know another person
Men do leave great relationships Jonathon! A taste of something different!
I am very surprised that you stated that!
New South Wales, Australia
What are you surprised at?
Haven't had a healthy mate partner in my whole life. An agreed upon relationship that is not forever. Most marriages end in divorce so its better to do this than that! (1 divorce)
Narcissistic husband. This is way better
I just broke it off with a guy that told me I was using him as a place holder. I told him I was looking for my future husband. He said why do you want to label it. When he said that I knew it wasn't going to work.
1st husband 2 years
2nd husband 13 years - we would still be together but he passed away
3rd husband almost 1 yaer
Mostly I think your messages are sound advice and helpful.
I so disagree that a Woman dresses nicely for other Women or those around Her . I do not , if it’s a date I put my best foot forward and yes would like my date to try the same .
What made You conclude Women feel entitled simply because they wish to create a positive impression
If I hear that lame term “ entitled “ one more time
I now joke about it as I being mid sixties was recently called entitled by a 25 yr old . It made my day , I’ve joined the club
Jonathan , you made extremely powerful content in this video! Thank you.
I appreciate that!
I don’t like the way my boyfriend talks about our situation in front of our friends when I’m not around. Someone asked him, why don’t you just go move with her? And he says, “It’s more complicated than that cause she has kids.” And, “well…I really like her.” But then he tells me he loves me. But, he wouldn’t dare say that in front of others. Something triggers me with this.😢
He wants to take his time, while I just wait over here.
I was telling my sister this …. She is dating a guy who was with a woman for 5 years then dated someone for one year after and now is dating her. I told her , he is not healed and now he moving their relationship along so fast. I don’t trust him because men do not move so quickly unless their desperate or need someone
Bingo on that!
He will only ‘worry’ IF he is interested, invested & cares.
You are so honest . I wish I had a person that guidance me like you when I was more younger. Anyway I had to learn all by myself the harsh truth. Thanks God I’m in stable relationship right now and I don’t even want to think about if I has to start over again 😂 is crazy out there these days.
Question-a man from neglected childhood & sexually suppressed by mother who then becomes gigolo & with 50 women in early life then marries late for common goals vs passionate love & compatibility & eventually wants to separate as wife allegedly sleeps on couch first 7 yrs, can he ever overcome a fear of abandonment to sabotage when getting closer & stop trying to get love from sexual acts vs a real relationship?
That’s so cool you watched Alex! I only watch him when i am not respecting myself enough in my relationships lol ❤
it does not really matter. I am elderly and we full aware of those issues. The things that you read online and in news . shocking attitudes of society. Never mind the males we have. I had brothers 4 of them so I sorta know how males are in a house. I hope you do well. sorry your women did not work out. It is hard living with siblings and here we want to be with a guy that we never met. My first husband my only one,. He was homeless and it a blind date. we hit it off right away then I married him in a month that lasted 47 years until he passed away. I had a great guy. once. sure we disagree some but that meant we are not boring.
What kind of society have we become where we accept years of communication and never meeting the person live? I don’t get it 🤷♀️. I added in my profile, not interested in digital relationship.
Agreed
¡Uff! PREACHING THE TRUTH!!! "Why do younger guys prefer mature women?"... (44:28) LISTEN UP COUGARS! Don't say you weren't thoroughly advised!!! I absolutely LOVE your straight forward honesty, Jonathon ❤ Ladies, don't hate. Appreciate!
awe... thanks
Thank god f Ur advice...at least at this point in my 60 odd life ..wish I knew all this 35 years ago ..I certainly would have been in a better place today❤😢
You are so welcome
He states older adults don’t change so you have to learn to accept a relationship that is not ideal for you as your options are very limited at this age in 50s
Hi Jonathon. Question: I get that men are driven by lust and limerence but i encounter an attitude by a lot of men on and offline who want to treat women like a Baskin Robins ice cream flavor they want to sample sexually first before committing to. How can I and other women whom have gotten this same attitude or expectation from men get men to simmer this down and not treat women as something they can sample before commiting?
Yes
Don’t be the ice cream.
Indeed. You're worth more than this. If they're still like a kid at the candy store, and are low character, low Chakra men, they aren't trustworthy , healthy, mature or evolved.
Self control is powerful.
Not a man worth your time. This is often a ploy to have sex with you and drop you and move on to the next sucker. It's manipulation and not relationship material. He a player. Stop playing games with clowns and wasting time.
Don't let them sample
I expect a man to treat me 100%. I put a lot of efforts to make myself look nice for the date, not for me. I don't consider myself entitled at all. If men can not afford to buy a plate of food for a woman, there is not future.
Noted
Question-a man from neglected childhood & sexually suppressed by mother who then becomes gigolo & with 50 women in early life then marries late for common goals vs passionate love & compatibility & eventually wants to separate as wife allegedly sleeps on couch first 7 yrs, can he ever overcome a fear of abandonment to sabotage when getting closer & stop trying to get love from sexual acts potentially behind your back vs a real relationship?
This 'place holder' concept is an easy out for not keeping a commitment to work through the seasons of a marriage or relationship. Causes a lot of pain for people. If only we all read your book recommendations...especially Gottmans.
some men only play a game and they say we care but they do not care it a dead end you will never meet. I like talking but some are one way. You never get a conversation. They want to be with you but not to talk.
I appreciate the statistics..they help me be a little more brave when searching for a partner. Instead of telling myself something is wrong with me..I can tell myself the odds of things working out. Does anyone else tell themselves statistics? I was happily married for 8 years..unfortunately my husband chose substance abuse over me. I spent a year sad and grieving. Now I'm trying to get myself together to date again. 😊
100% Karma believer here 🙋🏻♀️ I’s metafísica, just as Dharma. What goes around, comes around 🌀 Sooner or later!
I need to know how to spot a genuine grower and builder.
Www.jonathonaslay.com/coaching
MEN WANT TO PASS ON THEIR GENES & WOMEN WANT PROTECTION; ESP WHEN PREGNANT. THIS DATING WORLD IS BACKWARDS. KEEP IT SIMPLE ❤
My audience is the after baby making years...
So so good! Thank you Johnathan
You're welcome 😊
Hi Jonathon, I am in a significant relationship with I, myself! I am safe now!
New South Wales, Australia 💝🌺👌
Everything you say highlights the commonalities and differences between the sexes -- as much cultural as economic and social. One thing seems to be missing -- how to reckon that sex drive on both sides is an impelling force, seeking an attractive and potentially serious love interest. Hollywood fails us all miserably with its shallow, pervasive, profit-driven inculturations.
Genuine female sexual need impels women to in-between relationships as well. Toxically, these are pervasively one-sided, ignorant, and misogynistic on the part of male self-satisfaction and utter lack of mutuality of shared appreciation and male-female dialectic consciousness and complementarity.
Women will engage in sex as readily as men, but it is accompanied by expectations of at least some mutuality of pleasure, respect, consistency and understanding. Many men are clueless about female sexual pleasure and orgasm and behave in an indifferent, callous, transactional way. This pervasive chasm creates great friction in all areas of social interaction. It is a topic aside from finding one's mate, because it part of the journey to that end. In-between sex for women requires skillful lovers, and this is broadly ignored as a major blind spot in all cultures. To have satisfactory in-between as well as enduring relationship experiences, men must be taught in earnest about mutuality and differences that are exciting and worthwhile. Tantric exploration is grounded in female consciousness and is intriguing but very misunderstood. It is ignored in place of the many other factors you eloquently and convincingly cover.
I would like to know what triggers emotions (like the vacation) up front, however, I would like to know that one’s awareness of themselves is accompanied with the ability to emotionally stabilize themselves. But will someone ‘tell’ on themselves? ‘Sorry, but I may lose my cool’
Triggers?
Toxic relationship: If I feel the need to compete with someone, today I will show my partner who is the boss.
Good relationship: If I feel the need to compete with someone, today I will show my partner love empathy, kindness and gratitude or also humor, to show other couples how it works.
This mindset means my intention is not to waste time competing with my partner, because it's useless for me but to compete with other couples, who probably need improvement and nice inspiration.
Exactly
Well said. Competing challenging and constant tests aren't healthy. Comparison and competition are the thief of joy.
Yes I love the wiping the vomit for the person…. Yes true love…. I’m hoping I can find a man to hold my hand when I take my last breath…. Best memory my dad doing CPR on my mom 34 years ago…. That was love , would love to find that one day ❤
Dalexis (Alex from Mindful Attraction) is another one of my favorites!
I like him too 👍🏼
Great video Jonathon. I learned a lot
Glad it was helpful!
Oh my god I have literally just spent two weekends with this person 😭
Dating 63 year old men he is ghosting me at his age I am shocked
I think I would enjoy going on a date with you! I love your personality and sense of humor. 👍
I'm flattered. Well, if you're ever in Redondo Beach, CA I'm always up for coffee and fun conversation. 😀
O my, It really is surprising of the questions women will ask. They already know the answer, but just continue the denial behavior.
Question: How do you get these women to understand that they are being used?
I truly enjoy watching your videos, Jonathan and wish you all the luck in finding your special someone. Hopefully, you are not being too analytical. It's difficult living with someone who is unconsciously observing and analyzing why and voicing their opinions on every daily behavior. Leaving the toilet seat up means you are not yet adjusted to having a female in the house. LOL. Forgetting two to three times is understandable, but after that, maybe a problem of accepting a permanent relationship. Why do I say this? Well, from experience.
Question- once you find he has not been honest with you, can you ever overcome that & get past feeling & acting suspicious?
♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ resonating; sinking in;
Wonderful!
Question- how do I respond to the statement that once you’re married and have kids you can’t have another relationship the same way because you’re not building same type of future together or pair bonding like you are when you are young?
Thank you Jonathon
My pleasure 🙏
So, if you walk away; and they come back within a few days... What then? Do you continue with him??? I'm here; but this is really early and I think there is a divorce recently. That's my concern but I'm not sure how to ask, or is it too soon to ask?
Hard to say... I need more information
I love father Alex mindful attraction but this is a great video
Glad you enjoyed it!