Compilation Of Michael's Best Jokes About Babies And Toddlers | Michael McIntyre
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- čas přidán 28. 05. 2019
- Trying to make a baby, overdue baby, playgroup and teaching babies to walk and talk.
Website: www.michaelmcintyre.co.uk/
Facebook: / themichaelmcintyre
Twitter: @McInTweet
#MichaelMcIntyre #Babies - Komedie
The way he said "theft" had me dieing 😅
Same 😂
dying*
Katarina Šuljug literally who gives a toss, this was 2 months ago ahahah
The way you spelled dieing had me dying
@@karrahxeros1103 ha
"you never wake a sleeping woman" so true
Or a sleeping man.
🤣🤣🤣
G for gnome. 😂🤣😂 I lost it!
N for gnome
And here come I convinced he actually meant genome.
HE'S FRENCH!! 😂
HE'S A GENIUS!!
Marielle Hjeltnes she’s talking about what Michael said in the video, dumbass
😂 had to clutch my stomach, laughed so hard
🤣
@@idek6219 learn to spell British DUMBASS
Marielle Hjeltnes takes one to know one
I remember my mum telling me what my first word was. Mama and papa are the Dutch words for mum and dad. Turns out the first word that came out of my mouth was mapa. So when I yelled MAPA I'd basically ask both my parents to come.
Haha my son is 2 and when he wants both of us he also says mapa 😂
My mom doesn't remember my first word because: "You always talked so much!" ... Being the 3th child.
In my language mapa means map. (Filipino if you're wondering).
I don't know what my first word was but I Always called paracetamol (asprin) pielepallepolletjes XD
My first word was cow and my 16 yr old aunty used to complain cause she was certain it was directed to her.
The three dislikes are from the family whose child STOLE his kids toy head
Its at 298, its a war against lineages now
It’s now in the 300s
I am so happy I found this dude. Best comedian EVER!
AwstheticBunny He is great yes, but check out Dave Allen too.
Listen to his Audiobook. Its available on here on CZcams somewhere
@@chriswilliams6568 Dave Allen is crap, boring , not even humorous. Sean Locke is the guy.
@@lastjellyontheplate8828 millions would disagree, and I have never even heard of Sean Locke.
@@chriswilliams6568 Dave Allen is old hat, and if you haven't heard of Sean Locke then you're probably not English.
Whenever I need a giggle or laugh out loud I come back to Mr McIntyre.
NO JOOOS I'm dying xDDD
Not so funny peanutbrain
As a baby I, apparently couldn’t say „hello“, „hi“, „hey“ or anything like that. I could however say „how do you do?”
Omg you must have been the cutest, most accidentally sophisticated baby ever
This is so British and so excellent
My little brother, he's three, can't say duck yet he can say platypus.
😀 so cute
My first word was..
Daddaddaddaddaddaddadd
6:52 “It’s snowing In August” Michaels been watching Nanny McPhee
Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, Echo, Foxtrot, Golf, Hotel, India, Juliet, Kilo, Lima, Mike, November, Oscar, Papa, Quebec, Romeo, Sierra, Tango, Uniform, Victor, Whisky, Xray, Yankee, Zulu. For those wondering.
That's what q is thanks
India, indigo can sound like kilo on broken net.
@@steelleey7263 oop didn't notice I thought it said India
G is for Gnome according to Michael.
Woundering what?
The child of friends of mine was very quick with talking. When they took him to the doctor she asked them if he could already make small sentences, two or three words in a row. And their boy answered with. 'Mommy, what does that woman want from me?'
Me as a baby!
My kid was freakishly good at memorising random stuff she heard and when a friend and I took our kids through an echoey tunnel the kids started shouting "ECHO!" to hear their voices sounding back and my kid shouted "ECHO LOCATION DEVICE!!!" We were like wtf??! 😂 must've heard it on the TV. Precocious little shit.
LOL!!
My best friend's daughter was around 18 months old when my husband asked how she was feeling that day. She replied, ummm exuberant.
wooowww amazing
When I was learning English as a child I had "x for x-ray" :D
Or xylophone
That was a very weird way to learn English.
X-ray is pronouncing the letter X, but xylophone is how it is used in a word, like a "z" sound.
You must be an Aussie ☺️ am I correct ? Or not even close ?
My grandson couldn't say top but he could say abacus. Go figure.
The running gag is that in wealthy families the first world babies are taught is prenuptial arrangements.
Which is sort of true ;)
My son wouldn’t say please but could say lawn mower
When you realize his kids are now 14 and 11
Anna T wait what
Anna T I already knew! It feels strange watching this!
Oh wow-
That’s really weird, his eldest son is the same age as me I swear he was younger 🤔
Omg no way
I’ve just discovered this amazing comic, and now I can’t stop watching his videos... I’m laughing my head off 😂😂😂
N for knickers. Absolutely one of Michael's funniest things he's ever said
Absolute talented entertainer! Hysterical, without having to use expletives unless it’s absolutely essential!
Hello Denise how are you doing today,merry Christmas
Playgroup.... summed it up amazingly!!!! 😂😂
"Licking batteries..." 😂
I HAVE BEEN WATCHING HIM FOR 2 YEARS NOWW NEVER BORD
Omg Michael I love you. You've saved my sanity throughout this lockdown what a gift to humanity you are 🥰😂
I make a point of listening to Michael for at least fifteen minutes daily. I’m a much nicer person because of this ritual, and I haven’t murdered my husband yet, which was definitely on the table before Michael came in to our lives!😃
Blessings! 🙏🏻
Jesse.🌹
Help its 2am and everyone's alseep.
HES FRENCH!!!
Laughing and snorting at the same time🤣💜
XD the random man in the audience calling out "Curry!" X3
He's French accent is so good !!
YOU LITERALLY CAN NOT BEAT BRITISH HUMOUR 👏👏👏
TRUE. ONLY CANT UNDERSTAND HALF OF WHAT MM SAYS. TOO LOUD, TOO FAST. I KNOW HE CAN BE FUNNY BUT NOT WORTH THE EGFORT. TRY SLOWER AND LESS DEAFENING, MM !!!!!
@@gwae48 oh well at least Brits can understand everything he says
hes the best comedian by farrrrrrr
"sorry i was busy" 😂
"G for gnome"
Im totally using that! 😀
That is SO accurate about the diseased toys in manky church halls!!
#playgroups
This guy is awesome and he doesn’t use vulgar or filthy language 🤣🤣
Look up on CZcams Michael McIntyres Midnight game show you’ll be in the stitches
One of my sons first phrases were. “Don’t do dat”. And Put dat down”. I felt it a reflection of my parenting. 😉
"Nooooo Jeeewwws" 😂😂
Love Michael"s humour. His humour has a great deal in common with the sensibility of women humourists. Nice to see a man who "gets it"!
In Italy we use the names of the towns to spell words... same struggle: when you need it, you can't think of a single town with the letter you need! 😂
My little brother says no all the time! It’s so funny he’s 18 months and it’s so cute 🤣 and Micheal is so funnyand what he says is so true as well 🤣😂🤣😂
Slight age gap?
English isn’t even my first language and I had X- for “Xylophone”
2020 anyone👀... nope? Just me binge watching all of his shows? Okay...
My daughter Sarah wants to see you in a live performance. She has tried for almost 5 years. You are too popular. She is now going to Montana in the states because her husband is in the military. Thank you for being so funny and I myself have had a wonderful time watching you. The Dentist is the funniest thing I have ever seen. I told my son who lives in Colorado to watch it. He enjoyed it as much as I did.
Genius!
He is arguably the funniest comedian on the planet.
I love how he says he had another baby. Lolol
A for aisle
C for czar
E for euphoria
G for gnome
H for hour
K for knurl
N for mnemonic
P for pterodactyl
Q for queue
T for tmesipteris
W for wryly
This is awesome. What you're really doing is testing their spelling abilities.
He really is fantastic
*“If a celebrity has died or it’s snowing.”*
😂😂😂
I love the curtain between the different jokes😍
"You will never meet a xylophone player in your life!"
Me, someone who actually plays xylophone: Well lucky you!
It should be X for Xanax lol
"You'll need that when you grow up love"
N for knowledge
That was the quickest 10 minutes of my life
My Mum worked for the army, we use Alpha zulu etc in my house, lol.
I always use the nato phonetics when trying to spell something on the phone like my surname or postcode, I was never in the army or police I just learned it for some reason =P
Alot of people use it. It wasn't made for the military and it isn't exclusive for them either
We in the Travel industry in Canada use the phonetic alphabet over the phone to prevent mistakes in passenger names as it is so important it be exactly the same as the name on their passports. But when we speak to USA suppliers they often do not know it. Same as they rarely know the 24 hour clock.
This guy is comedy genius 🤣
Love this guy laughter guaranteed sides will hurt
i'm crying so much
my eyes sting like hell right now
N for Knickers 😂😂😂
m for mnemonic
P for Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis
P for psychic
Nick Winz it’s actually pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis not koniosis. Lol sorry I’m just a dumb 12 yr old that somehow knows how to spell the longest word in the English dictionary...
I love you so much @Michael McIntyre!!! You are truly a gifted and amazing comedian and help to amazingly lift the vibration of this wonderful blessed world even higher… Thank you so very much for helping to brighten my life, Dude! And thank you to everybody involved in sharing this video with all of us! God bless everybody and everything everywhere joyfully, peacefully, funly, deliciously & cleanly! Woo hoo! Thank you very much Mother/Father God/Universe! 🙏💡😇⚓️🍀🪴✨🎉🦀🍶🙂🎂🇺🇸☮️🌟💚💐🌈👍🏽💖😜👌🦤🎈🦾🏍👏 much respectful love to all from Texas! 🇨🇱✨🎉
He is soooo friggin funny😂😂
He wants brioch HES A GENIUS!!!!
LOVE THIS HAHAHA! SO FUNNY 😂💓😂💓
🥺
Brilliant
Love him 😅
His talent is seeing the comedy in our everyday life. Mu husband makes me laugh all the time accidentally.
He is so funny it's clean fun and I love it that the royals are being a part of it nice
Have you seen the Boston hornbook Primer? "Xerxes the Great did die; and so muft you and I". At least Xylophone is cheery XD XP
One of my todlers would jump up and down and excitedly shout "fuck! Fuck!" I worried people would think he had be raised realy badly so I would have to correct him so as everyone could hear "yes darling, its a big truck!"
No turkey no car should be a song. XD
I genuinely once had a taiwaneese guy on the phone read out 'E for Eye'
Michael... looking for a word to use when verbally clarifying an alphabet letter can be even better if you quote from this book: "P Is for Pterodactyl". The book is subtitled: "The Worst Alphabet Book Ever". I await a new video... heehee!
I am SO glad I happened to find your videos! You're hilarious!
My father used to say "You spend the first 2 years of your child's life to teach them to walk and talk... and then the rest of their lives wishing they would just sit down and shut up"
also, I work in customer service and what makes me laugh is when I "N like Nancy?" and I get "No, N like November" as a response
Love Michael ❤️
Worked for an airline. On our first day on the phones my co worker blanked and said v for vagina lol
I really like this episode of Michael mycentyre he is so funny in this episode
The french part had me loling
Such a good laugh
I'm watching this for like the 400th time lol x
“no joosssss” 😂😂
I’m Keith’s and I’m cry-laughing. My little siblings have done the same thing 😂
"he's french!" 😂
It’s snowing in August 🤣
I actually thought the same thing about Xylophone until 2 weeks ago when we were at the music lessons and the first thing they pulled out was a Xylophone 🙈.
Love the "G" for Gnome. That goes well with the "K" for knife and "I" for king 🤓.
The camera person must go crazy with him. So funny, but a bit hyper.
Love him
I once said K for Kit-Kat down the phone to student loans. Both the call handler and my mam and sister were in hysterics.
😄😄😄
First you've got to set the house on fire then you've got to knock on the door... "fire department!" "Evacuate!"
what?
@@jayamarillo628 curry + sex = labour
My boy couldn't say superhero went round asking g for shitinaboat
LOL "He's French!!!!" Canadian here, when we told our two children that we were going to have another baby, our 4 yr old asked, "Will it have a British accent like Nana and Grandad?" LOL
that spotlight guy is getting his workout🤣
My sister started babbling and forming words from a few months old. I didn’t speak until I was two years old. And then I just spoke full sentences. So yeah, everyone is different.
Exactly.
Dude, babies escalate from 0 to Genius in like a friggn year. Meanwhile, I'm over here fumbling with a USB drive, still trying to figure out how to fit it into its stupid port.
G, for gnome.. I've actually used that before! 🤣
No matter how much I see this "you will never meet a xylophone player in your life" will always be funny
"No,Caaar" 😂
As a non-native English speaker living in the UK for a while I can say, that the phonetic alphabet is the first thing that you will learn to use, if you are willing to learn the language at all or to integrate, because you'll have to spell soooo many things about yourself, or just because the pronunciation is not on point.;))
I'm an American secretary, and speak with many different nationalities bearing many different accents over the phone. One of my favorite types of people to speak with is the person who has a heavy accent, but they KNOW that and they spell everything phonetically! Although I'm pretty good with accents now, and never want to embarrass anyone, it can be a huge help.
Good idea! Hang around cars. 🤣
xD, How can u be that funny 😂😂
When u like ur own comment😭😭
Lol every time 🤙
We can't help it! Us commenters are just so funny!
3:25. For whenever I need this joke.
When my boy was in playschool and took him in the others would mistake me as one of the people working there 🤣
I couldn’t stop laughing the whole vid omg 🤣
What x for x-ray I’m a genius 😂😂😂 finally thought of a different one lol 😂😂😂 that’s one quite useful for me I have scoliosis and everybody will probably have one xray in their lifetime xx