Every Southern State Giving Directions
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- čas přidán 9. 03. 2023
- Alabama knows exactly how many Dollar Generals to pass, Texas reminds you just how big Texas is, Kentucky wants you off his property, and Oklahoma is just happy to be here. Sorta. Not Really.
- Komedie
Subscribe or take a ride on Cranky
... Can we take rides on Cranky even if we're already subscribed? Like, is there a line, are the rides free or is he willing to take chicken nuggets as payment?
Matt, you absolute fool.
You oughta know by now that we are all doing both as fast as we can.
Just to be safe I created another account and subscribed just to avoid any potential issues.
Don't you threaten me with a good time. Either way.
But I want to ride cranky, subbed already. Sorry, but I'll be measuring him for boots.
True story: My mother was up in the Texas Panhandle with a friend from Scotland, and when asked where he wanted to go next he said he always wanted to go fishing in the Gulf. So they set out from Abilene to Galveston... And got a motel for the night in, I wanna say Dallas. Next morning as they started driving Scotty asked "So, how many states do we pass through until we get there?" "Oh, we've been in Texas the whole time," came the reply, "It's just about another 4 hours away." The Scotsman was stunned; they'd been driving for 2 days by the time they got there. If you try to drive anywhere back home in the UK for more than a day you're gonna need a boat because no matter what direction you go you're gonna run out of land.
When Texas hosted its State Championship football games in Houston in 2015, the local newspaper compared the distance where each team was coming from to the distance of European countries.
Did you mean Amarillo (in the panhandle) instead of Abilene (west central Texas)?
@Kim Sadler as someone from Lubbock I'd agree that Abeline isn't the panhandle
@@DevinMoorhead I lived in Abilene for 24 years. Moved out of state and still miss Texas.
@@Naturesong56 it's beautiful just off the caprock
The aggressive Southern Hospitality shown by Mississippi is so accurate 😂
And the knowing of their kin- folk
It ain't just over there in MS, half my family in AL and GA are the same way.
Biedenharn Coca-Cola Museum 1894, Coca-Cola was first bottled for consumers 🎉
Vicksburg, Mississippi, Red Carpet City of the South, home to the Miss Mississippi Pageant, with 4 Miss America Titles
As a representative of Virginia, we thank you for your kindness for telling D.C. what all of us think
Fellow Virginian born and raised!
I used to go up to DC to buy weed and psilocybin mushrooms and that's probably the only good thing I can say about the District of Columbia
DC now has recreational cannabis sales for every tourist. Being from Rocky Mount Virginia we considered the Mason Dixon line was just North of Charlottesville. In Rocky Mount to be local it took a couple of generations that is if you're not too uppity, then it may take 5 generations.
@@randystone4903you need to rethink that. As a representative of Madison county, we are north of Charlottesville and would like to annex them to NoVa. I’m sure Greene, Orange, and Culpeper would too. Cville is a sh!thole.
Hi fellow Virginian I’m also a representative And the dc thing is totally accurate idk if anyone’s heard The song Rich men north of Richmond
Shup up, border state, you're basically 50% Yankee. Take DC out of your economy and you're basically Mississippi without the seasoning.
Born in Alabama. Grew up in Virginia. Live in Texas. Spent time in Georgia, North Carolina, and Mississippi. You’re spot on for all of them.
Moving to NC from Washington state next week for the better year round weather, option of lakes, the ocean, and mountains, and for the job opportunities in my field. I also have some family on that side of the country. What do you think of North Carolina? Will I like it? I’m excited but also nervous to move out of my hometown
I hope you like spring. Because it’s the growing season in NC year round… there are orange cones and barrels growing everywhere.
Except in the actual spring when the pine pollen turns the state yellow.
@@goheat007I've in Charlotte for 5 years and I can tell you it'll be great.
And orange vests only half the time. For speed enforcement reasons (never read the boy who cried wolf. 1 NC Politician)
as a Tennessean i thank you for saying what we all think when we hear " hi i just moved here from California "
Exactly. Quick story:
When I was in college, I had a class with a girl from CA. One day, she made the mistake of saying "well, THIS is how we do it in California (can't remember what we were talking about, but she was implying that the CA way was the correct one)." It was followed by a room full of eyerolls, and the professor - I repeat, PROFESSOR - said "well, why don't you pack your shit and take your happy ass back there." She learned a lesson that day. When you move to TN, you never, EVER, begin a sentence with "well, where *I* come from..."
Fellow Tennesseean here, I feel the same way. I live in Knoxville, so I’m not as annoyed if someone moves to Nashville, but I just don’t want them to go any further east.
Hat's Off to this man for correctly representing how we feel as Members of the Volunteer State ! LOL
Tennessean here, nailed it, absolutely nailed it
Consider yourself blessed, all ours in South Carolina are from up north. Two thirds of my class at the University of South Carolina were from the north. Of course, most people from South Carolina can't get in the University of South Carolina business school, but I don't think they should all be from up north, or foreigners. Stay strong.
As a Virginian that was 110% accurate.
"You're going to DC?"
"Why?"
Had my giggling silly.
And he dressed like most people here
As a Virginian, I was just happy to be included in a video about the South
I'm from Virginia, living in Florida now. I expected the usual: head on up 95, see the sign for Dumfries, y'all are purt near there. But it gets weird the closer you git. Are you sure that's where you wanna go? Why? Well Bless your heart, y'all take care now.👋
But that's just my directions.🤣
👵☮️🖖 Have a blessed day now.
@@TintagelEmrysright!? I was pleasantly surprised.
In reality, you would probably get directions to a moonshine distiller way out in the mountains instead.
As a former Louisiana resident, I understood every word he said
Me too🤣
I can understand most Cajun as it really isnt that different from the Kentucky hillbilly speech my dad spoke.
Yeah Wasn’t hard to understand him . I have known folks around here sound like that just a little wound up is all.
How? It sounded like straight gibberish.
@@JanelleGodwin-zl8li It's quite simple, just live in louisiana for about 2 months, and you'll understand
As a proud Cajun from south Louisiana, I can confirm the accuracy of the Louisiana directions. Especially the part about stopping for a link of boudin. Though we too use Dollar Generals and Jesus billboards as landmarks. And "big rig wreck lawyer" billboards too, unfortunately. So many billboard lawyers..........Hey! Maybe we can feed some to Cranky!!!!!!!!!
I lived in Lake Charles for a little while and I loved it! One of my favorite places I lived. Even though I couldn’t understand a lot of ppl, they were always friendly! And I loved the drive thru mixed drink tiki huts. Never saw those anywhere but LA.
Hello cousin from central louisiana. It's just easier to take people to their destination and Yes, we're stopping for boudin.
You guys actually understood that?? LMAO
I live in New Orleans and I don’t understand anything anyone says in the rural parts west of Baton Rouge, and I’ve lived in the south my whole life. I even had family that lived up in Morehouse Parish, far up in North Louisiana, and their accent is straight Southern up there. I understand that just fine. The folks that talk with that Cajun influence though are truly speaking a different language, even when they’re not speaking a different language.
I actually understood the last third of that! I’ve lived with a man who has chaw in his bottom lip for most his awake time and has a bad MS accent anyway plus is quiiiiiiet. I can understand him now about 75% of the time, so the LA guy was fun once I realized he wasn’t gonna talk so he was intelligible.
LOL
When I was a kid growing up in Texas, I'd ask my parents "Are we still in Texas?" on long road trips. The answer was always "Yes". Now, in my mind, Texas is the default size of a state and all other states are just small.
You should try diving in Alaska. :D
You're not wrong!
Tennessee counts if you happen to be going east/west. We went from East Tennessee to Oklahoma and the halfway point was in Tennessee.
Same. Even more confusing are all the places with towns touching each other.
If there ain't at least two rest stops between them, can you really call it a seperate city?
As a Californian, I have the same sort of mindset.
As a Floridian, this is PAINFULLY accurate. It’s either toll roads ‘till judgement day, or backwoods routes that are better navigated on alligatorback
@@parkivich if you're talking about around downtown Orlando or Tampa, I agree with you. Try navigating I295 at the Buckman bridge or the I10/95 interchange. True story.
I know at least 4-5 ways to get somewhere that don't cost tolls. and they're all back roads.
@@lelandconner3337
Malfunction Junction
@@parkivich I always feel like I'm getting ready for the start of shuttle launch whenever I hop on I-4. "Alright, passed the toll, heading into the loop. Getting ready to merge in 3... 2... 1... vvvvrrrRRRRRMMMM!" Cause if you don't step on the accelerator somebody going 5 times the speed of sound is gonna slam you like a pancake.
@@brianhall4182 same thing on I75. I hate driving on it! Who needs to go to a Daytona race when you can just drive on the fricken interstate. 😮
Mississippi is so true. I stopped at a little country store to ask directions. Didn't know anyone, But ended up having lunch with the owners, and then they "fixed a bag" for me to take for later. It was great!!
As a Mississippi resident, we humbly await your return
(We enjoyed having you)
As a native Texan I actually had a Ms Darlene and she gave directions as you go over yonder and …. Her father was a baptist preacher who was passed before I met her but he painted the winged pegasus sign on things across Texas. She was related to Buster Welch and once had a party where I met Tex Hill of the Flying Tigers. True story.
As a former Quarter Horse cuttin' horse owner / competitor here living in Illinois - the late great Buster Welch is still & always be my inspiration ! ( my best cuttin' mare was Southern so hope maybe I'm a little bit Southern by that connection ? )
As a Cajun who's lived in Texas his whole life, I can confirm the Texas one is true and I'm proud that I understood every single word spoken by the Louisiana guy
I, sadly, did not..
Can you please transcribe it?
My grandfather’s side of the family are Cajun and his Louisiana directions made me laugh so hard
@@mochimochi7669 It became an accurate imitation the second he mentioned boudin 😆
Southeast Louisiana here, as in Texas. I understood every word as well, but Texas...I am convinced they just make shit up here! Nothing is pronounced the way it is spelled. At least in Louisiana, we can blame it on the French, but not so much in Texas.
@@orp8428 if you're referring to towns, then yep, that's definately true. Some examples: Buda, Manchaka, Blanco, Bexar (yes ik it's a county). It's ridiculous 😆
As someone who moved to Louisiana twenty-five years ago as a child, I am proud to say I understood a full _three-quarters_ of what he said.
Then PLEASE tell me what Dr. John was saying in the live version of Iko Iko. I mean the English parts. Please.
Ain't nothing like a coonass trying to tell you something to question the English language
I'm from Tennessee and I got about half. But I used to watch Justin Wilson's cooking show. He told great stories and boy could he cook!
Born and raised in Louisiana and he wasn't saying anything, he was imitating the dude from Waterboy 😂 we don't talk like that... unless you go real deep in the bayous
But, he did say in the middle "you see that alligator you gone jump right over him. Move on over I'll take yall there"
@@sheilab15 omg he was the best!!!!!
As a southerner from Kentucky, I can say that the Kentucky one is partially true. Theres 2 different types of Kentuckians, the one in the video and then there’s the “oh you poor thing lemme show you where to go!”
Don't tell them how nice we really are, they'll want to come here.
What I noticed is the more city they grew up, the ruder they are like if you ask directions from a guy in Louisville he’ll be exactly like In the video but if you ask someone from say SouthWest of South Central Kentucky they’ll be like “Oh bless your heart you poor thing so you take this road until you see………”
As a Kentuckian. Please don't let the truth out.
Funny cuz they're true.... as a Southerner my whole life I am absolutely amazed by how accurate these sketches are... great job once again!
I was a firefighter/EMT up in North Georgia and was new to the county I was working in, and we got a call in the middle of the night. I stopped by the dispatch office (in the same building) to get directions, and she told me "Go by where Farmer Tucker's barn used to be, turn left, and go down a smidge."
🤣🤣🤣
I live in NW GA, 15-20 mins from TN line and I can confirm this is how directions are given 🤣 I try to avoid Atlanta bc of Peachtree everything!
@@renaesmith687Traffic is horrible too
@@renaesmith687 Who would want to travel ITP anymore.
Is farmer Tucker like the Texaco Mike of Georgia?
As a 25 year resident of Louisana I can attest to getting directions nearly exactly as you portrayed, only longer and even more confusing. It all stemmed from a supposition that I knew where “John’s former gas station” was. Things went downhill from there. 😅 Thanks for the laugh, Matt!
At this point just direct them to a Walgreens which is either near or at where they are going
I agree! Although, we usually pull out a napkin and draw an equally confusing map cause we’re a visual folk. Friendly too…
Lol. When I moved to Southern MO ( and , yes, it's the south) I was so frustrated by " where the furniture store used to be". That was 30+ years ago. We're civilized now. Unfortunately.
@@YSLRD Most sources I found call Missouri the MidWest
@@badelementofstyle5238 Significant parts of Missouri are Midwestern but they are known for BBQ and SEC football, so they are getting absorbed by the South. If you meet a native who says Missouree, they are the Midwestern variety, while the Missourah ones are Southern
Dude, I've never seen your channel before, but I'm glad I stumbled onto this.
First, as a native Nashvillian, a thousand AMENS to your portrayal of sending the Californians back to where they came from.
And although it was subtle, I caught your little jab about driving until their electricity runs out. Nice touch.
Second, as one who has lots of family in Texas and having driven all the way across the state many times, your Texas impersonation was also spot on and hilarious.
Also, seeing as how I couldn't understand a word the Louisiana guy said, that also was fantastically accurate.
Furthermore, I loved all the repent names in South Carolina.
And finally, the Virginia one about DC, so true.
The accuracy of each is what made them so good.
Well done sir.
Ditto! Subscribed!
Idk as a native Floridian I don't remember hearing anything like that, though most of the time I just ride with someone else anyway. Not to mention my mom is a native Midwesterner (born in Indiana but raised in Illinois)
Lived in Florida half my life and Georgia the other half. Oh man I wish we could send the NYC transplants back to where they came from
Kentucky born
"What you Wont" was accurate af
The fact that I'm born and raise in SC and I knew exactly which Repent sign he's referring is sending me over 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
BAHAHAHA ITS ACTUALLY *REAL*?!!! That’s soooo much better!
😂😂😂😂😂 omg now that's hilarious
Same 😂😂
Oh goodness, that's hilarious. I live in SC, too, but I don't take the interstate enough to know that.
This is why I laugh when europeans say you "Americans" should be able to get around by walking. I say "bless your heart...sure if you live somewhere like NY city, but it isn't that way in the south." Here you can drive from one side of Texas for 12 hours and still be in Texas and that's not to mention it's hotter than coal fires of hell if you happen to be doing it anytime past June. Then I invite them to come on down in August and see how far they get walking...😂
Ikr! They don't get it because of how things are portrayed in movies and on TV. I have heard from folks overseas that all they know about the USA is places like NYC, or the wild west and cowboys, lol. I have an uncle who came here from Thailand as a young man, and he totally believed that the whole USA was just like wild west and cowboys everywhere. To this day, he has cows and horses and believes that is the way to "be American". He is all about anything that he thinks is the American way, and for him, that's cows, horses, and rodeo, lol. But i will say, he loves this country and appreciates it more than most who were born here. He's a good guy.
@@crystalparker2542 LOL, bless him I bet he's a hoot!!! If he loves and respects our country then he's alright by this Texans standards! We have so many ungrateful half-wits and a lot are moving here to Texas from terrible states! I just wished we could switch them out for those that would come here and respect what a privilege it is to live here, people like your uncle!
Satan doesn't dare come here in August.
I've always said that we need to focus on making those changes up north. But yeah, alot of the south and Midwest just too spread out. I'd say you guys would get more out of rail. But yeah unless they intend to make cities into huge shaded areas with massive mirrors like some 1980s Sci fi stuff
Right now in Fort Worth it is 105 degrees (40 celsius) and has been for weeks. I barely walk to my truck.
Georgia, SC, and NC had me dying. I'm from Asheville NC, so that Biltmore thing? Ooooh yep. I remember when it wasn't so bad, we'd get a season pass, go walking the gardens and such, but dang. The price now? Absolutely painful.
As a Floridian, there are at least 3 ways to get anywhere: The freeway(or turnpike/ toll road, depending on where you are), the back roads, or the water. The first is crowded, there’s no cell signal on the second, but you get the choice of toothed creature depending on the salt content of the water you’re on. It’s either ancient lizard or ancient fish
You must not be from the Panhandle. We have to use either Hwy 98 or I-10. Need to Evac for a hurricane? Better leave the day before they tell you to leave.
@@lakeirelandreal Floridans don’t evacuate
True southerners understood the Louisiana voice on the first listen.
I did!! Grandpa was from Jennerette, LA. I was born in Savannah, GA but raised most of my life in TN
I mostly grew up on the West Coast but a lot of my family is from Southeast Texas, so that's probably why I had no trouble understanding it.
teywutscootoballtakeyadeah!!
Yep. Have family from the Monroe area. 👍🏽
Had family in Grosse Tete. I'm from South Dakota and can't understand much, but their kindness always shines through.
Florida: “It’ll cost you an arm and a leg in tolls”
New Jersey: “awww that’s cute”
Avoid tolls by taking back roads, my brother has a master degree in back road shortcuts lol least in Florida😂
Pennsylvania looking at the other two: Oh you have no idea
FL has 734-ish miles of toll roads, the most in the US , so here’s your beer back 🙃
@@kaelanmcalpine2011 Yet we still have the worst roads ever.
HA. Have you driven in South Carolina? I don't know what they spend their money on but its not Highway maintenance.
"Get off my property." Yup that is us in Kentucky.
Same in WV 😂😂
That or you’ll meet the nicest person you’ll ever meet on the road is about to explain the directions as if they’re a google maps assistant
"You're from out of town looking for Biltmore? Yeah, that's...shocking."
Correct.
Matt did it AGAIN! Your portrayal of "Kentucky" was right on the money :) We're suspicious of EVERYBODY -- including our own families. If somebody shows up uninvited we JUST KNOW they are scouting another location for a Dollar General -- and we tell them to "Git!"
I hope they don't treat me like that! I'm hoping to move there in the fall.
From Kentucky, yes you are correct about Cincinnati
I’ve gotten scared sh*tless getting lost down too many hollers. Unfortunately sometimes work takes me down too many unfamiliar hollers.
@@dizzysdoings depends on where you move. If it’s in the city your fine. Unless it’s Louisville. Then it could go either way depending what area you go to. If it’s in the hills. Make sure you go in the day and make sure you know what drive way is the one you want to be on.
@@dredennis113 have no desire to be in or even near a city! And, I don't go out much at night.
Oh my God, that opening of the Texas one is practically a quote from my wife during my first visit to the state. We drove down from Chicago for Thanksgiving dinner with my in-laws in East Texas, where we found that her uncle, who lived in Lubbock, had had to cancel. She was disappointed that we missed him, so I suggested that since we'd already driven all the way from Chicago, we should go visit him in Lubbock after Thanksgiving. She just laughed and laughed, then told me I needed to go look at a map with a scale.
Yeah, it's roughly the same distance from Longview, Texas to Lubbock as from Chicago to Longview. Man, this is one big-ass state.
Not every day I see Longview mentioned. Sorry you had to go there.
Cumberland Gap VA is closer to St. Louis than it is to Virginia Beach.
No way! I had to look this up.
Longview to Lubbock is indeed about 7 hours. But Longview to Chicago is about 13 and a quarter hours.
@@TomHoffman-uw7pf loud im Virginia and didnt even realize that
*laughing in Texan*
I'm rural Virginia and I approve this message!
I attended a conference in DC with a bunch of high schoolers from all over the country as a Virginian. A lot of them were really excited to see the city and I was astounded. I felt that guys "why?" in my very soul, we weren't there for five minutes before a homeless guy was offering us a 'tour' of the city.
“You head out the Evergreen road then you turn left where that big pecan tree used to be.”
That pecan tree blew down in 1963.
Lol.
Remind me to never get lost down South.
My mother gives out directions this way. Whenever I need to get somewhere, she'll tell me the names of every other store near it, or near where I need to turn off, and I have to tell her again and again that I don't pay attention to what's on the sides of the road when I'm driving, so if I've never gone _to_ a particular establishment, I could've driven past it 100 times and it'll still be useless to me as a landmark because I have no clue where that is.
It's always fun to see the combination of awe and horror when someone thinks going from Dallas to San Antonio is a quick trip from here to there.
It's only about 4 hrs. Not too bad 😂
@@pugsabi I was going to say that, it’s only 4 hours!
That’s a day trip for lunch.
It depends on what time you hit Austin and for the last couple of years it takes an hour to get through Waco thanks to construction. So 4 to 8 hours.
@@texasforever7887 if you go through Austin to get to San Antonio, you aren't doing it right
So I clicked on this video SPECIFICALLY to see how you would portray Texas. I was expecting something like "when you get to the prickly pear that's actually flowering take a left, and take a right at the one farm that has a black horse" lol. But I'm seriously impressed. Texas is HUGE. We often forget how much bigger Texas is than other states but it's definitely a mood....lol
So glad I saw Biltmore before it cost as much as it does now! And Louisiana's "scoot on over I'll take you there" makes me think of when I went to Texas A&M. We never gave directions, we just took people wherever they asked.
My favorite experience was asking for directions at a roadside store in Vermont and being told “You can’t get there from here. You have to go someplace else to start.”
I don’t know about the rest of Kentucky, but in Louisville, we tend to give directions based on things that are no longer there. For example, “You know where the Bacon’s used to be? You’re gonna take a left there, and then you’re gonna drive past the library that used to have a tank out front.”
Live South of Louisville and we all give directions based on the unique gas station names that aren't official since the bigger companies bought em all up.
So in a way yeah we do the same here lol
Wait... So y'all don't give directions based on where your own relatives lived 30 years ago??
Florida too
West Virginia, too.
@@nikkimcdonald4562 that could be East Kentucky, lol.
As someone born and raised in SC i can confirm. I went to college in Charleston SC where there was a law that you couldn't build higher than the highest church steeple so big companies just kept building larger and larger churches so they can build taller so there were churches around every corner. Now I live in one of the most northern SC towns and from my apartment window I see 4 churches. Lovely to look at though I've never been religious so I have no idea what the inside of any of them look like lol
Me and my wife are from VA and absolutely lost it. “Why” 😂😂
I lived in Texas for 23 years. Truer words have never been spoken. Texas has a monopoly on having miles and miles of nothing but miles and miles.
I've never been to Texas, but I have a relative who lives in Lubbock. He once told me that when the area was first being settled, land went for a penny an acre. Then he said, "If you ever saw the land there, you'd think they paid too much!"
You just described the trip from El Paso to San Antonio. The only reason that Fort Stockton is between them is to give you a chance to get gas and to take a break. It's like being on the ocean, where the scenery never changes.
I'm a new transplant to Texas, and I swear, the state rock is the concrete traffic barrier.
My grandparents lived in Texas, went every summer & it was always a 2.5-3hr drive to the airport, which I thought was long....then my DUMB-ASS thought I'd drive there when I was older...3hrs ain't NOTHING! 🤣
@@cariwaldick4898 Ain't THAT the truth! You got me to laugh out loud! I'm up 'round DFW. I always say I know I'm home when I get off the plane and smell that TEXus smell -
hot grass and lawnmower/car exhaust.
The five complete stops I made on the interstate around Atlanta during the two hours it took me to drive through one city gave me a deep appreciation for Ted Turner and his ability to bring companies like AOL and Time Warner together. Apparently, he is the only person from that city who knows how to merge.
We named the place where 75 and 85 merge “the Merge”
You can imagine why
Being a resident of the metro Atlanta area I can attest sir that you are correct.
Growing up in the ATL area for 26 years of my life from birth till 26. I can confirm that merging doesn't exist, you just hope you don't die by that one guy on 285 or 85 or 75 or now recently 400 weirdly going 90mph in the far right lane and nobody knows why. Basically Atlanta driving is like a 4 way stop that you never fully stop at you just keep inching forward till everyone starts moving again and that one crazy guy merging in and out. You know that guy I told you about earlier the one going 90 in the far right lane? Ya its probably the same guy.
Dope stock market joke. No way anyone else gets it tho. 😂😂
😂
"Hope you charged this up!"
I'm rolling. As a guy who has lived in CA, I 100% agree with this.
Mississippi hospitality is so great. I stopped at a gas station for gas and lunch going from Louisiana to Georgia to evacuate from hurricane Ida. They chit chatted with me like we knew each other, they said I could bring my dog in so he didn't have to wait in the car, and they gave me fresh fried fish while we were waiting for our lunch order. That whole evacuation turned into a nice vacation. My area back home got hit pretty hard though.
For the Georgia one you should have finished it with, “Once you see a peach tree you’ll be in Georgia then. Oh, you thought Atlanta was Georgia? No, it’s not. It’s in the state, but it’s not part of the state if that makes any sense.”
So like Austin and Texas!
@@j.martin5504 Austin is like the Vatican City for Texas. They think they're Texans but they ain't
@@yourregulartexan1113 Spot on friend. Social cancer hit Austin years ago and it is slowly spreading. I am 61 and Texas born and raised. I hope I have time to die before Texas falls to the cancer. To find real Texas, you have to get out of the major 'urban' areas and go out into the rural land. Good percent of the 'transplants' crowd into the urban areas (big cities) -- to be in Texas does not make you a Texan. You have to live it, breath it and think it and these transplants will never reach that level. Only home grown have it down.
@@j.martin5504 or Huntsville and Alabama, or Miami and Florida, or Tupelo and...no, that one checks out
@@reesaserik3759 Better enjoy it before the axe falls. I'm up near Dallas, and about your age. Austin has developed a collective psychosis. (Hardly anybody in Austin is from around here anyway. Can't they just move to Seattle? It'd be PERFECT for them, they're gonna LOVE it.) People are pourin' in here looking for affordable housing (which, now, it ISN'T), no state income tax, and a balanced state budget (won't stay that way), and I think our schools are okay. ("We just have to change a fewww things, 'kay?! ;> Like, you CAN'T tell my son that no amount of surgery and lipstick will give him two X chromosomes, a uterus and ovaries, capable of birth! That's not teaching factual information, it's HATE-SPEECH!")
People, at least in Austin, moved away from the fallout of failed experiments and collapsing social structures, but they seem to have dragged some of the broken, demonstrably destructive ideas along for the ride. Now, they want to put their toxic old millstones around OUR necks. I feel like some people want to punish Texas for being successful - and maybe, because we've been conservative thus far, and it's WORKED.
So, they'll flood the state, scream so loudly that the voices of reason will be drowned out, then proceed to make us everything that they wanted to escape from.
For anyone who wants to call me a "hater", do you truly ADMIRE the surging violent crime and homelessness in Seattle? Do you truly love San Francisco's defecation-stained sidewalks littered with addicts overdosing in shanties? Tell me, what have those situations improved or produced?
Is that what anyone hopes that their child will someday have?
I was staff for a convention in College Station once & we were talking to one of our guests about getting to the con. He suggested that he could fly into Lubbock and just drive to the convention. The staffer working with him just said deadpan, “It’s a big state, Brian.”
Right? He’d be better off flying into Houston and driving up.
@@TheCJTok Even Houston is about 2 hours away. I think he wanted to avoid the small plane that he'd have to use to get to the airport in College Station, but eventually that's what we did..
@@Pseudowolf This is hilarious.
We keep Lubbock far away from College Station as a defense mechanism.
@@jac-attack 😂 When I was at A&M, Tech was our nemesis when our baseball team traveled there.
As someone born and raised in Kentucky I have to say you nailed it. You also got the Biltmore accurately.
As a person from New Orleans and never lived outside of Louisiana. I laughed my butt off!!!! I would have died from laughing if u had a hook on the brim of your hat, so thank u for not having that. 😂😂😂
Nailed LA! As a Missourian who got lost in a bayou low on gas one time, can confirm 100% truth been dropped.
Almost 20 years ago, my two friends and I decided to "spontaneously road trip" to New Orleans for Mardi Gras. No plans for a hotel or place to stay, just go... enjoy the party scene for to days and leave. Upon exiting the vehicle, some guy approached us asking for cigarettes. My friend gave him a pack and asked where we should start .... he proceeded to give us a tour in the THICKEST Cajun accent imaginable. We were more lost after that encounter than we were when we started! Nice guy, pretty sure he was homeless but we didn't assume. Told us which alleys to stay out of to avoid trouble by pointing and saying "no! Trouble chér" [or "troubles there" I dunno].
It was a stupid decision made by 3 young men that thankfully ended in a hilarious memory that we are able to share 20 years later. I hope that "homeless man" or whatever he was is doing well and living a blessed life!
In Georgia we build a moat around Atlanta to keep the city folk in there. If you see a sign for 285, just get on it and drive around till you find the interstate you started on again.
True! I think Spaghetti Junction was built to confuse the heck out of anyone trying to get off 285.
Make peace with your favorite deity, first; I-285 is officially the deadliest interstate highway in the country. It averages about 3 fatalities per mile, per year. I learned how to drive in that traffic.
The moat doesn't work. I grew up in Hartwell and it's full of Atlantans who've bought lake houses. Everybody calls them the lake people and after they come here all they do is complain that Hartwell needs more stuff to do. Go back to Atlanta.
@@pamelahornick8108 I hear that; I grew up in a quiet neighborhood in Lilburn, but these days it's so built up, it might as well be part of Atlanta. So glad I moved out to a rural area.
I was in North Carolina, and wanted to find a laundromat. I asked a man on the corner. He said “you can’t get there from here”.
Matt is hysterical! 😂 ❤the different personalities he develops for each character!
I’m from Mississippi and I love Mrs. Darlene! She is a sweetheart. So accurate! I love that Mississippians wind up knowing somebody you do. ❤
I’m from Mississippi and can say your telling the truth. She is such a sweet lady.
But did ya ever know grandpa Stephens over in Mendenhall?
@@DChrls Home of the sweetest Miss Mississippi I ever met!
@@DChrls Yes sir. He was a great guy.
@@TheGoffense8120 ~ What do you mean WAS! I just saw him yesterday, at the Sunflower..
As someone living in South Carolina, this couldn’t be more accurate 😂 we use a mixture of church’s, religious billboards, and waffle houses to give directions
That, and where stuff used to be. What I've always gotten around here is , "you know where the old A&P used to be?" Or maybe ,"you know where the peach orchards used to be?"
S. Carolinian here too. I've given directions based on all of this and pot holes. I once told someone "After you pass this road and see a big pot hole, go ahead and get in the right lane because that pot hole is smaller and then make an immediate right".
@@bluebirdonmyshoulder5633 I count potholes instead of miles to know when to change oil. Such is the joys of living in the GSP region.
@@slaughterzealibib ,well hi neighbor. I'm also in the GSP area so I can relate. Hope you have a lovely night and wonderful weekend!
When you get back to the main road, take a left. After you pass 5 Baptist churches, take a right. Don't turn right AT the 5th Baptist church, you have to pass it and take the next right. Then go until you see a huge oak tree split down the middle and turn left before you get to it. If you see wagon wheels buried in the ground as a driveway marker, you've gone too far.
The most accurate dialogue of all actual Virginians when asked for directions to DC or Occupied Virginia I've ever heard
As an Alabamian, this is so true. We're full of dollar generals, and 7-10 churches all by/across from each other on the samew road.
The Texas one, though haha. It feels weird driving through a couple of states in about the amount of time we drive between metropolitan areas.
It was a culture shock for me when I moved out of Texas. I was amazed at how I could travel within 2-3 states within 10 hours, lol.
As an Arkansan born and raised, I can affirm that we have some of the weirdest names for towns. Other than ones that were mentioned in the video, these are some of my favorites: Bald Knob, Possum Grape, Booger Hollow, Nimrod, and Snowball.
I thought West Virginia won the award for weird town names, but now I think Arkansas may be the champ.
Don't forget Friendship and Hope. Also, as a kid, Smackover used to give me the giggles, and I'm not quite sure why.
Also, the look of horror on my wife's face, who's from Georgia, when I corrected her pronunciation of El Dorado was priceless. For those who don't know, the town in Arkansas is pronounced El Doh-Ray-Doh, or if you're like me, El Duh-Ray-Duh
Don’t forget Blue Ball
Don't forget Tulip.
Oh we had Meat Camp in NC and plenty more
We’re just glad you mentioned Oklahoma.🎉
*sigh* Yeaaaaah. As someone from Oklahoma, this hits me in the feels. In the midwest they say we are southerners, in the south they say we are midwesterners.
My dad had a friend who was visiting Mississippi and was looking for the nearest hotel to stay in. This was years ago, so he had to rely on maps and word-of-mouth for directions. Anyway, he asked some local, who told him that the nearest hotel was “four far-sees and a possum toss”-and he was serious, mind you. Like, that was actually a serious estimation he made of the distance.
so about an hour and a half?
Noted
Ok...that is a serious estimation, pretty much anywhere in the south. It's ok. We know what we're talking about
That's anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour away, and probably just over 50 miles.
As a lifelong resident, Louisiana this is spot on. The further south you go the less intelligible people get. But it doesn’t matter because hospitality and great food are languages too. And we’re exceptionally fluent in both.
Awwww
Intelligence is based upon the individual, however, some of these towns do have a little to much radon in the well water if you catch my drift.
@@270emanhalf of Louisiana still hasn’t rebuilt
@@thecringeprince2040 I was just watching a video about the different regions of the US and they mentioned that a lot of the katrina people went to atlanta. Never came back. I love that swampfire seasoning from down there. 🔥
@@270emanintelligible doesn't mean intelligence. It just means you can't understand them.
Thanks for having Virginia in your list. I live in my hometown of Jax, Fl. now, but grew up in S.E. Va. My heart lies in Richmond!
Absolutely rolling! I lived in a small west Texas town for two years. By small, I mean less than a thousand. All dirt roads, no mail service at the house (had to go to PO and pick it up each day). Unless born there, you were a newbie. No street signs. Directions were given from the Tasty Freeze and houses were the original owners as in "Oh, you live in the old R. Timmons' place." To go to Lubbock or Amarillo, it wasn't measured in miles, but in hours. In fact, no one spoke of mileage at all. Groceries and gas?--that was a half-hour away. Hospital?--an hour...or so.
I lived somewhere like that on the TN/AL line
I LOVED it
I have no idea how far away things were still, just how long took to get there!
My life goal (& I’m old) is to get back there no.matter.what.
This had me howling! Texas, Mississippi, Louisiana and Georgia were so right on. And yes, I'm a Texan, my late mom's family is full of Mississippians, my ex is from Louisiana, and other kin are Georgian. 🤣
As a Texas transplant from Mississippi, I approve this message
@@mikebyars9463 honestly I don’t see people moving to s southern state from a southern state as a transplant really. I see the entirety of the south as a big family, now if they came from outside of the south id say it is then.
My first big trip out of San Antonio as a kid was to Colorado. By the time we got to El Paso, I had already pledged to never leave Texas by car again. I only have one life, I'm not spending half of it driving.
I'm in Washington State and we were full of Californians for the last decade, so y'all can have 'em all now! 🤣
@@JackieBaisa Texas says no thanks and would you consider letting us air lift AUSTIN up to you.
@@aweeks6649 HA! Fair enough!
They put Fort Stockton between San Antonio and El Paso as a bit of comic relief.
@@JackieBaisa Man, I live just north of San Antonio and there are so many rude people moving here. Please, keep your share of Californians to yourself!
as a texan, born and raised, thanks for that. people still always seem shocked about how massive our state is, but forget how much of it is just the middle of nowhere for miles and miles (and some more miles). “i’m the last person you gon see till you get there” is semi true, but we can’t forget about the little sketchy gas stations and weirdly decked out rest stops along the interstates. i’ve always felt like those huge shiny rest stops in the middle of nowhere are the texas version of the lotus hotel and casino from percy jackson 😂
Best line: "get on I-40 west and just keep going.."
As a Mississippian I really love and relate to that clip. We are hostile hospitable- you WILL come in and sit a spell lol
As lifer on Miss. I can agree whole heartily. Tennessee is spot on also.
How long does it take to say goodbye? I mean from the first 'wr gotta get going' to actually pulling away in the car?
If you're lucky it'll only take an hour to say bye in Mississippi
I explained to someone the other day about refusal/acceptance etiquette; you should politely refuse twice so that you aren't seen as "taking advantage" of someone's hospitality, but then you MUST accept on the third offer or you insult your host.
Mane always like that in wiggins
Bro, ya got Louisiana spot on 🤣🤣🤣
Is it weird I don't need that translated.
@@Denozo88 🤣 Right!! Completely clear and concise 😅
Everything seems fine to me
It felt like that is more Southern Louisiana and not Northern Louisiana.
@vtaylor21 true, up north ya get more of that country drawl...at least the family I have up there 🤷♂️ I'm in cajun country lol
As an Asheville native and part time Uber driver; “oh you’re looking for the Biltmore?” Really hit home.
"until you see an actual peach tree, then you went too far." 😂😂😂😂
As someone from Central Texas who has to travel hours and hours by car before I hit a border, I salute you.
Same here! The fastest way out of Texas is to Mexico! 🤣
@@Wowee2012 🤣🤣🤣
did a nearly country wide roadtrip from GA to NM. It was just under 24 hours, and 13 of those hours were just in Texas.
@@MauiWowieOwie bless your heart!
For Georgia, you forgot that the same road changes names every quarter mile or so. And the spelling is different each time (Clermont/Clairmont/Clairmonte).
You want Peachtree NE, now that road goes southwest, and then becomes Peachtree N
😮😂😂
I hate that shit
Oh, man. I thought they only did that in Denver. #LordHelp
Ain't that the DAMN Truth!
The Georgia one is so true. The amount of times people get Peachtree City (southwest of atl) and Peachtree Corners (in northeast atl) confused is hilarious
Matt, you mentioned the Alex Shunnarah sign in the Alabama part. I was visiting a relative in a Birmingham hospital and some poor fellow down the hall kept calling out, 'Doctor, nurse help me'. He did it over and over as it wasn't really urgent but he just did it. I know it's a sad situation we shouldn't laugh at, but from time to time he would also call out 'Call Alex Shunnarah!'
That’s hysterical!
That he said even that
My dad used to live in Kentucky, and he got lost in the woods, and from the story I was told, the only thing missing from your sketch was the lack of a shotgun.
Had to have been Eastern KY where all the crazy hilljacks live. We're much nicer and more civilized in the Western part of the state.
Or rifle, depending on the time of year.
Ain't no lies. We don't like outsiders lol
Although the "big cities" in Kentucky are welcoming. You can take that from this Chicago boy who lived in both Lexington and Lou'vul. But, if you move there, be prepared that the first question you will be asked is, "What church do you go to?"... and you better have the right answer!
@@randmeller 1. Thank you for saying the name of the town correctly.
2. I always have the wrong answer for the church question.
3. As I learned, most problems are solved by the local bourbon.
On the Oklahoma bit I’m pretty sure the best way to describe our southernhood is we’re that friend at the party that only knows the person we came with
Not really. If you would consider Texas and Arkansas to be the South, then you have to consider Oklahoma to be Southern as it sits smack dab between both of them and is below the Mason Dixon line, in line with Arkansas, Tennessee, and North Carolina.
LOL. Oklahoma is the designated driver at the southern states party.
And we cant drive 😂
I think it's pretty wild that a state which borders Colorado is considered Southern. Southwestern, maybe, but not Southern
Lord have mercy, I am , have been and always will be from North Carolina. Not only would I try to feed you , you”d take a bag full of food with you for the trip. Bless Y’all.❤
“His name is cranky but he’s a sweetheart” accurate Florida shit
As an Okie (Boomer Sooner!) who has also lived in Alabama, Arkansas, Tennessee, and Texas, I approve this message.
Having lived in Arkansas for three years and driven through Oklahoma, I feel for you. I really do.
@@jackielinde7568 I was born in Arkansas and so was my mother. My mother said of Oklahoma, "They can give it back to the Indians." My great-grandmother, born in Texas, lived in Oklahoma until she died.
@@kevingray8616 so you chose treason?
I’m originally from Oklahoma myself live now In Alabama and I approve this message
Okie here as well lived in Boca Raton FL Atlanta GA little towns all over Mississippi Bama got family in Nashville Tennessee never actually lived there tho I almost forgot my adventures into Texas lived in Galveston Austin Houston
The Atlanta one is great. The look of confusion you see on peoples faces when you say about 3 or 4 different peachtree streets never gets old.
There are at least 8 Peachtrees lol
When I lived there, 28 streets were named Peachtree something or other, but only one was Peachtree Rd. And everyone from there knew where that one was. :D
I'm in Oklahoma, and I felt that. Oh bless anyone asking Louisiana for directions. 😂🤣😂
As a Kentuckian I have to explain the way we REALLY give directions. It’s like this: Turn left where the old Dollar General used to be. Go 2 miles and then turn right where they’re going to build the new high school. Go slow over the bridge because they haven’t finished fix in’ it yet. Turn right where Jenkin’s barn burned down that year of the bad wind storm. Can’t miss it.
Perfect! As a Kentuckian I know that exact spot 😉
This is exactly how I heard directions given in the south when I first moved there. Once I knew my way around, I would give other people directions with street names and they would look at me with confusion and say, “huh?” So eventually I gave in and was giving directions with landmarks like everyone else. But I never said, “can’t miss it” because I know for a fact that you CAN miss it and be hopelessly lost driving down roads that have no signs or sign of life.
Now, I dunno about you, but I am a little suspicious you didn't mention where the new Dollar General will be?
Are you from Cincinnati?!
Exactly!
Checks out as real Kentucky directions: a majority of the directions are based on things that don't exist anymore.
Went on a vacation to Mammoth Cave Kentucky. Had to ask for directions once. Was deliberately given the wrong directions. Matt's portrayal of Kentucky seems spot on to me.
Someone had fun with you there
@@coolandhip_7596 nothing fun about being sent 45 minutes out of the way.
I’ve lived in Kentucky my whole life and that’s not something the majority of Kentuckians would do. That person must have been a transplant. Sorry that happened to you.
Sorry somebody did that to you. That’s not cool at all. Not al of us are jerks I promise 😅
Sorry somebody did that to you. That’s not cool at all. Not al of us are jerks I promise 😅
LMAOOOOO 😅 😂😂😂 As a person who grew up in new york currently living in south carolina for 7 years now, this is one is on point!
As a native Carolinian, can confirm we have probably 9 banks that used to be Pizza Huts in my town. One's also an urgent care now. Except we too use Dollar Generals as landmarks
Oh! Oh! I'm from Oklahoma! I was hoping you'd include us the whole time. See, you take a left out of town and keep driving striaght on the toll road through an endless blank landscape for a couple hours, turn at the Kiowa Casino, then pass about 10 dispensaries and you're there.
The Mississippi one was so true to me brought back so many memories of going on hurricane Katrina to cut trees and the people were so friendly and even cooking and looking out for each other and us and the other people there to help, can't beat southern hospitality for sure.
Deep in the heart of Texas!
Of all your videos, this is my fave😂
❤ from Alabama
Your KY impression is SPOT ON!!!! My mom worked as an census taker in 2000 and there were places that her boss told her not to go to because they "didn't take kindly to strangers", my mom has never met a stranger so she thought she'd be fine, yeah that didn't last long and she finally listened to her boss. She didn't do the census in 2010, obvs.
I know of some relative of mine that, let's just say, we're the last to see a census taker
@@coolandhip_7596 Hilarious! I can only imagine!!!
My grandparents in Kentucky say otherwise. Because my grandmother is one of the nicest women on earth. I’m willing to bet money even if a felon walked into their house she would serve him a meal.
@Mason Pyle My mom's the same way, but not everyone is so kind. It's not a KY only thing, but in some of those backwoods people are interesting individuals.
And this is why the South will never fall to invaders. We're like Afghanis on steroids 😂😂😂
So true about Mississippi- I went to Mississippi to help with the Hurricane Katrina cleanup. I thought I'd help, and I'd probably lose a few pounds since I was spending my time helping people clean up debris. I gained 5lbs- everywhere I went, people kept feeding me- best gumbo and shrimp ever
😂😂😂
Aww, Missouri definitely needs at least half of our state in the South.. Ozarks is where the South begins… My grandparents are from very southern Missouri a stone’s throw from the Arkansas border... They are absolutely southern. They have the twang, more churches than people in town, play bluegrass, & make Southern food (chocolate gravy, navy beans & ham, fried chicken with white gravy, biscuits with either gravy, and of course cornbread which is the first thing I learned how to bake)… Anddd we’re Scots-Irish.. I also only recently learned that Ornery was the same word as ON-Ree which my grandma called me.
Missouri always seemed more Southern to me than Midwestern.
As a Texas Tech alum, he is absolutely correct about Lubbock being 4 gas tanks away! LOL The Oklahoma one caught me off guard but was hilarious!
Growing up in SC, this is how I remember directions:
Go down yonder 'til you get to the four-way yield, but don't worry, no one actually yields, we're not sure what that means. Then hang a right at the old tree. You can't miss it; it's covered in kudzu. Head down the road a piece until the red barn that was torn down. Hang a left and keep going and it's just over the third hill. If you see anything resembling a town, you've gone too far. Watch out for the tractors and deer. God Bless.
Though Matt ain't wrong about the Jesus signs, this is on point for SC. For me, it's always where things "used to be" or "the old tree that's covered in kudzu".
So true! Upstate SC typical directions.
@@Lizzievance12 I'm upstate too! Another thing that's true in this video is about Biltmore. I'm right at the state line, yet I've never been. Can't afford it.
The freaking Louisiana part had me dying
1:18
Louisiana is sooooooooooooo accurate!!! 🤣🤣🤣
As a Kentuckian I had a moment of 'wait, that's not right, is it?' And then I stopped and thought about how I'd react if a random stranger started talking to me out of nowhere. No, yeah, that's right. I don't know you, why are you talking to me?