The most POWERFUL conversation technique
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- čas přidán 16. 06. 2023
- This is the power of saying YES AND. Most people say YES BUT in a conversation which doesn't build on their response, it actually negates it.
If you want to keep a conversation going in a positive direction, use YES AND more!
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hey vinh.just want to voice my appreciation for all the valuable information you offer helping people to harness the power of their voice. You're changing lives here, bro. Thanks
Thank you for granting me access to your course. I so much appreciate it!
Well if you want to lift people up keep it positive but I want to see you tare someone down.
Can you make a example video of using this, with real world contexts?
Finally something useful even for natural extroverts.
"You killed my cat!"
"Yes and your family"
Could you tell me the positive direction to find their bodies?
@@Mexicoca yes, and they are 10 feets under the ground
@@RaefetOuafiqo 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀☠☠☠☠☠
@@RaefetOuafiqo Yes and I pissed on their grave
Itachi
My boss said to me yesterday, “James, you are late”.
I said, “Yes and I don’t care”.
I think he respects me more now.😊
"yes and there was an accident on the road"
I think you’re fired now lmao 😂😂😂
“Yes, and I’ll make sure that never happens again.” He said replay with yes and, not reply with a dumb answer. People are trying to debunk this method in the comments but are all failing. Lol
@@asiyagasayni4811 Yes and i fired my boss too.
@@DiamondWhite91*reply
I’m about to “yes, and…” my way through life. Thank you.
Exactly, I don't like when people say but! It sounds to me like butt..
@@TheEnrico1994 I guess that you are more of a boobs guy then...
@@w花b so? What's your point
Flew right over him
Kids…no fighting under my comments mmmmkayyy ☺️ Hug it out.
“ Are you guilty of manslaughter?”
“Yes and I’ll do it again”
Lol
- your product is too expensive
- Yes, and?
Is that you Apple?
Yes and the door is that way.
@@GSMaheshGS😂😂😂
Lmfao! This is what I'd love to tell some of my cheap ass potential clients 😂😂
And you a brokie
"You are ugly"
"Yes and I'm also broke"
Yes and I've had to compensate for that with this sparkling personality 😏
The bridge between psychology & performing arts is an intricate bond. Like much in life, our language defines most every outcome. Yes and is vital to improvisation in my conservatory training as an actor. But it was a surprise to discover acting class prepares one for therapy & vice versa. Thanks for sharing this Vin❣️🤓
This is actually a perfect example of where this technique works. That is a good way to reply to such a rude comment. It keeps your spirit up. Shows that you were not affected by the comment, and makes you not a target for bullying, and removes any awareness that may follow such a rude comment.
hey, that actually worked
@@Mishyou33 You were not generous enough with the compensation.
"your work performance needs improvement"
"Yes and so is my salary"
😂😂
"so does my salary". Might help.
Engrish are hard
@@HouseCat19Engliish*
@@Sinyao hmpt. I guess that's a salary deduction for me. 🥺
He made a good point and of course the comment section would have no chill 😂
“Did you cheat on me”
“Yes and no I didn’t”
Lol this is the best
😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
😂🤣😂
LOL😁😁😁😂
Why does it seem like Vinh just started explaining this to a random stranger at a party lmao
Yes and it looks like it's working
Yes and I want to hear more
Yes and yes.
I have a feeling he was trying to just chill, Vinh starts talking to him: "do you wanna learn how to have better conversations?", "Yes, but not right now..."
@@DeShark88 *yes and not right now 😂
Wife to husband: "Did you notice I made something new for dinner tonight- Did you like it?"
"Yes, and no."
"You just kicked me in the balls!"
"Yes and you're not gonna have children anymore"
This whole interaction has 5am after party in the kitchen vibes
Hells Kitchen
Cocaine is great for communicating
And the one talking is the guy who was doing coke all night and the rest just want to sleep but he keeps talking about his business idea he came up while showering on acid or something stupid like that
@@theshahofiran1323🤣🤣🤣🤣 💯
Cocaine has entered the chat
Person 1: "You're drunk"
Person 2: "Yes, and I'm naked."
😂😂😂
Peak CZcams comment here.
Sounds like an invitation 😆
@@jamesgrosiak3406real 😂
Challenge....
“You are late”
“Yes and thank God I showed up, I was contemplating not even going to work - I was informed we were understaffed again and overtime is mandatory”
Watching this guy's yt shorts keeps building new neural pathways in my brain
"You just kill my wife!"
"Yes, and you're next"
Bruh 🤣🤣😂😂🤣
Positive direction: you will still be able to be with her in spirit as well.
Yes, and killed*
💀💀
Well that would be in a positive direction if he really loved his wife
This is like overhearing a random conversation at a party I don't want to be at
Yeah and realizing everyone’s too drunk and it’s time to go.
Yes and it still gives useful information.
Yes and it still sounds powerful
Yes and I really shouldn't be doing that.
Yes and you weren't invited
This comment section has restored my faith in humanity
Fr😂
I’m cracking dafuq up 😂😂😂
Yes and these bastards are funny. 🤣
“I want a straightforward answer”
“Yes and you won’t”
- You cheated on me with my best friend!
- Yes and it was amazing!
Still sound positive 😂
This is some powerful stuff
That hurts more 😢
😂
😂😂😂😂
Employer: you’re fired.
Me: Yes, and I would like to feed my family.
🤣🎉 Best comment
employer : wow, that is a really good point! you're hired!
Yes, and you're a low performer and drag the company down. Employees don't have a universal right to remain hired
Damn that hit differently 😂
Lmfaoo this comment 😂😂
"You just killed my cat"
"Yes and I needed a car wash anyway so it was perfect timing"
Absolutely mind blowing. I always say "no, but". I will change
- you're a sex offender aren't you?
- yes and i just got out
😂😂😂
Too be fair…
It does sound better than
“Yes, but I just got out”
this is the best one holy shit
@@maeglin9252😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂 fucksakes these comments are gold
This man just discovered improv
yes and hes doing a very good job
@@TheRadiantSoap_ yes!!! and now i don't feel like the only person who caught that.
That's what I was thinking about posting, too.
Yep. One of the most basic exercises in improv, been around for decades. But we do it for entertainment - here they're doing it to succeed in conversations.
I remembered Conan
"You've set fire on my clothes and keyed my car!"
"Yes, and I'm so proud of my work I stood by to see your reaction."
Susan did that shlt!
There’s a powerful rule in social psych that’s basically “it’s not what you say but how you say it”. Keep that in mind, cause all of these verbal twists are nullified by poor delivery.
Yes and it will ruin your relation with people that got tired out that crap.
True
yes and I find this clip helpful.
yes and this is funny :D
Glad it was helpful! 😅
Yes? And
@@asicXpert Yes. And?
@@infinity8beyond yes, and just think how easily you'll remember it now that you've typed it in the chat too!
"I'm pregnant"
"Yes and I'm leaving"
"yes and we need milk, I'll go buy some"
This is actually really interesting. I could immediately hear the difference
Yes and I agree with you😊
Be genuine sincere and respectful. This boy teaching business ethics where there is none.
fun fact; ‘yes and’ is also an improvisation rule/technique used to make sure actors agree and accept information. This is used because if someone, for example, in an improv scene, said “omg look there’s a fire over there!” and their scene partner says “no there isn’t” then it shuts the scene down. So, in that example, you could say “Yes, and the fire is blue” or something like that lol
Yeah I don't get why he's acting like this is some "revelation for conversations". It's just to not stop the flow of an improv act.
@Khayul That's like saying you don't get how a single thing can have multiple uses. Because it's both.. did you not watch the video? It can make a major difference in the way you come off to people in regular life if it's not already something you say. Just because it's also used for improv doesn't mean his point is invalid.
@@beckarose7424 I understand that things can have multiple uses. The phrasing and overselling is what I find jarring. That's like listing all the ways you can use a butter knife. Yes, you CAN use it as leverage, you CAN extend your reach, but at the end of the day, it's a knife for spreading butter.
Not to mention that this isn't some super secret manipulation technique. This is just adding a word to a conversation, which doesn't always make sense in context. I know people who constantly do this to "not create tension", but then they contradict the person they responded to.
TL;DR: It's something to think about, not make a rule or fuss about.
@@Khayuli mean i didnt know abot that and probably tons of ppl. Yes, you k ow it becouse somehow ypu know this a ressource use in improv, but for an engenier its not that obvious.
@@nicolasniikhav0d-562 One's profession has nothing to do with this.
I don't hate that he's telling people that this exists, I hate that he's selling this as a "make yourself better in conversations" strategy, and not even citing what it's originally used for.
I bet most of the people praising this haven't used it, or if they have, it hasn't made a lick of difference.
"Use these words" is a common trick to make people think that they're getting good advice, because it's straight to the point, and very understandable. Fact through is that human communication isn't only words. It's body language, subtle facial tweaks and inflections. "Say X to be more charismatic" is such a tired old hoax line. Rather typical of "pep talk scammers".
It's setting up people for failure. And I honestly don't understand why people just accept things they hear once as the truth or as factual.
'Yes and' is a common dialectical therapy technique. It acknowledges that two opposing ideas or feelings can exist at once. Instead of thinking "i hate this but i need to be here" think "i hate this and i need to be here." It acknowledges the feeling of wanting to leave and choice to stay as both valid even though they are opposed.
Interesting, thanks for sharing
Interesting, thank ya
Its a common rule of improv as well
Yes and this is interesting
"Yes and" is a widely recognized and utilized technique in dialectical therapy. It serves as a powerful tool to acknowledge and navigate the coexistence of two seemingly opposing ideas or emotions. Rather than adopting a mindset of "I hate this but I need to be here," the "yes and" approach encourages individuals to embrace the notion of "I hate this and I need to be here."
This technique aims to validate the presence of conflicting thoughts or feelings within oneself. It recognizes the genuine desire to escape a situation while simultaneously recognizing the deliberate decision to remain in it. By accepting the validity of both perspectives, individuals can explore their complex emotions more openly and find greater self-understanding.
Through the application of "yes and," individuals can develop a more comprehensive understanding of their inner conflicts. It allows for a more nuanced exploration of the reasons behind their desire to leave, while also acknowledging the factors that motivate them to stay. By recognizing and honoring these opposing forces, individuals can gain a deeper insight into their own values, priorities, and personal growth.
Furthermore, the "yes and" technique empowers individuals to embrace paradoxical thinking. It encourages them to view conflicting ideas not as mutually exclusive, but as coexisting elements that contribute to their overall experience. This perspective promotes self-acceptance and reduces the internal tension that arises from the struggle between opposing thoughts and emotions.
In summary, "yes and" serves as a valuable dialectical therapy technique that embraces the simultaneous existence of opposing ideas or emotions. By adopting this approach, individuals can validate their complex feelings and thoughts, facilitating a deeper understanding of themselves and promoting personal growth and acceptance.
Learned this in 87 and it works every time!
"You killed that man!"
"Yes and I'll do that again"
“John, we’re letting you go”
“Yes and why would that be?”
“… Honestly, people are having a hard time communicating with you, there have been complaints”
“Yes and I’m using a powerful language model to bring the conversation back down”
“…. Please gather your belongings, & leave”
“Yes and”
“GET THE HELL OUT”
Yes and...
Yes and I can't get out of hell, but if you believe that this work place is a hell and I should get out of here, maybe you should join me, hell ain't a good place.
Straight out of a Jim Carrey movie😂
"we are letting you go" is not an objection it's a statement. you can't steer a statement
@etofok Yes, AND I'd like to know why... Gives you something to improve on for the next job!
My man Vinh always speaking like he has a business meeting in 5 mins. Love your videos man!
🤣 In an interview he said speaking that way shows passion.
I’ve heard about “yes and” improve technique since forever but this is the first time I understood what “yes and” actually is
Wow this is actually a very profound bit of simple advice that can help people in their dealings with others.
Man bun guy - yes and I just asked you where they serve the drinks.
Remember the best way to get rid of a salesperson is to tell them "I just don't want it" and not give a reason.
Yes and I’d like to know why you don’t want it? 😢
@@dljarman3708 no reason. Just don't want it.
@@steelfalconx2000 pretty sure the won't chase you further if you don't want it
Yeah and I think his example is more about pitching a product to investors rather than selling vacuum cleaners door-to-door
Yes, because you NEED this product.
If I ever meet this guy I'm gonna be like " Yes, and I've seen your psychological trickery videos"
Whatever the comment section says I think this man has got a point. Starting conversion with a yes create more politeness in your answer.
- why did you slap me?
- yes, and it was a tight slap.
😂😂😂😂
ok give me another slap please
Yes, and it's for your own good. [You now either confuse the person or makes him/her wants to know more]
Why questions are not answerable by yes and no. Yes and, only applies to questions, or situations that can be answered with yes or no.
yes and i want these kinda techniques more.
Okay, he said "yes, and I'd love to know why". Notice that he didn't say "yes, and I want to know why" - 'want' sounds like a demand, 'love' sounds like you're merely like a slight concern.
@@cerebrummaximus3762too smooth mr
Wisest waiter ever.
lol
u mean most wise
@@quangphaminh843Because 'wise' has just one syllable, it is not preceded by 'most. ' D) the wisest: This is the correct option. The noun 'man' is the 'wisest' in the statement, where 'wisest' is the greatest degree or superlative of 'wise.
I don't even blame you because "most wise" sounds perfectly fine
@@shreynaidoo7463 ok thanks for the explanation
This is the building blocks to improvisational acting and comedy
It works I got accused of "sexual assault" and simply steered the conversation in a positive direction by this technique. Thanks
Yes and I'd like to still put you on the registry
By saying; Yes. And?
😂 Sounds like "so what?"
😂😂😂
her: "officer! this man sexually assaulted me! "
him: " Yes and she had a great time! "
What kind of complex makes you act like this?
I love this guy's voice. I could listen to him talk all day long.
yes, but...
Yes, and he gives useful advice
Dude I’m just like this guy …every body tells me and I agree I see it . I always correct /coach people when giving an explanation about something important for them .
I’ll say to them , what you say and how you word this makes all the difference in the world … for a positive outcome vs a negative one.
Seems like he telling two people about to get their first drink at a party but he already drunk and mega confident.
Giving the same talk to everyone
Husband: I just caught you cheating on me with the neighbor
Wife: Yes and your boss too.
I mean when u phrase it like that , its understandable right ..
That is perfect response cause it opens up the point that your cheating cause you want out!.if you say BUT you still want to stay
Yes and it was for the promotion you want so bad. Hard working and supporting wife right there.
I always use: “Correct. Yes. And also, to agree with you totally, and additionally to add….” That always 100% lands me in the hospital with an amazing deal.
Feel like you’re either being literally and sell something to hospitals, figurative and I don’t understand, or there’s a typo somewhere
@@drewidlifestyle7883I was thinking he had such a great deal it made him ill from like a heart attack or something idk, ur right it's worded weird
@@carterbutler2535is he talking about getting beat up? I'm so confused
yes and also I would like to know more context: I think I'm missing a big part of your experience
@@diegofrana6137 watchmojo top 10 internet comment mysteries
I do this on social media because I saw a big difference. I haven't tried it in person yet! Great life hack!
Crazy how I find valuable stuff like this only randomly
The Gordon Ramsey of communication.
On point, even his voice 😂
@@geniusjjangjjangmanboongboongyou should have said “yes and his voice”
Thought the same
Yes and it is exactly his voice in a crowded restaurant. Very 𝔦𝔫𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤. 🤔
You wanna always chain on your opponents card effect instead of negating them. This gives you more card advantage in a duel
"My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."
"Yes and I'd appreciate it if you stopped saying that."
The subtle niches of linguistics never fail to both intrigue me and infuriate me.
Thanks as always for providing brilliant tips! The more I view, the more likely I am to retain even a fraction of these social niches lol
This guy studied improv and now knows how to use it in everyday conversations
Yes and it’s working.
If he studied improv he should’ve explained it better💀💀💀💀
yeah, this feels like: "Wow, look at this cool trick I've heard!" and doesn't understand that it's designed for acting in improv?
Because if you don't agree with what someone is saying, you don't say "yes and". This has nothing to do with saying anything, really. It's just a guide for improv to not stop the act.
I use this at job interviews... they have respect for me when they turn me down... but it's very positive
This is actually a *very* common theatre exercise and I often teach it to my classes when I see they are starting to warm up to the curriculum . It really helps them to learn not to stop the flow of ideas. It's a neat little exercise!
Nothing quite like seeing someone warp up to something...
That's literally the first rule of improv. Good way to keep things rolling.
He: I love you.
She: Yes and I love myself.
😂
Yes and I have a boyfriend *
Hold your ground. Only honest people know how to say NO.
I’m actually learning so much. This is really going to be helpful for me since my job is a lot of socializing and connecting
You're just teaching improv and drama lessons half the time I love it
Damn it actually does sound a lot lighter & nicer. ❤❤❤
"I'm going to kill you." "Yes and that's not cool bro."
yes and how are u gonna do that :)?
😂😂😂😂
why does that sound wholesome
This is actually really good. The comments are not doing justice to how authentic this is
“Can we do it?”
“Yes and please don’t”
Do this all the time. Especially with my wife
I think this is where I mastered this skill
Yall probably have a great relationship 💕
yes and this girl is a nurse and has warmed up your side of the bed for you, yes and she is just leaving, yes and let her put her clothes back on.
works like a charm, always in a positive direction. I love this guy
@@neanda lol not like that
Uh same 😂
Salesmanship 101. Never use negatives.
You should never do it because it's always the worst possible decision you could make.
people that tell me yes often,i find them boneless,no backbone yes men
Salesmanship 102. Always use positives.
@@conorx3 Never don't use positives
All generalisations are dubious...including this one.
I’ve been using and teaching this for 20 years! It works really well!
I love how this is some revolutionary business idea to y'all, meanwhile theater kids been using this for centuries
-You're ugly.
-Yes and you know only ugly people recognize ugly people.
This one is amazing
I just lost my mum...
"Yes and I'd love to know why"
Answer: yes and I can't find her
Yes, and I'm sure you miss her terribly.
I just lost my mom...
"Yes and?"
I put this in Watch Later, liked the video and saved in the watch history of all my accounts just to remember to say YES AND
This guy is giving, i just learned this today in college vibes.
Yes and this is one of the reasons I watch Vinh's videos
I wish i had heard this 2 weeks ago. This is truly helpful❤ thank you
I just used it now while watching this clip... It works!!!
It's very important for me as I always say : "No. But." 😢😂
So does my wife... 😢😂
I use that in teaching. Very important even when student is wrong is to not to kill their ideas by negative thinking.
Oh wow I had never heard of that distinction! I know “yes and,” and I try to use it, but the distinction between “and” and “but” is super interesting and I had never thought about it like that!
I mean ariana grande took this way too seriously, she turned into a song
Imagine if we talked openly in society in all situations and were just sincere and real.
I tried that. People got uncomfortable
Because it’s become standard practice to conform to feelings and not facts and people are so busy trying to sound better to realise you just gotta be authentic genuine and honest
Truth hurts baby
Germany is good with that
I'm having improv class flashbacks
This person has a positive additude! and this will drive you forward if you take the time to listen!
It’s changing the perspective to “it’s there because of this reason”
Damn i never thought about in this way
Yea and now you do ;)
"you just ran me over..."
"Yes and that allows you to visit the hospital for that long overdue checkup"
Yes and that does work
Yes, and I do not have insurance.
Vinh, love from Mogadishu, Somalia ❤🇸🇴 you are the best mentor, teacher guider you name it Thank you for the knowledge
Got it.
Using only "yes, but..." from now on. 👍
Damn, big difference
It’s from the book “how to win friends and influence people” by Dale Carnegie if anyone wonders.
Yes, and...people always think they are the first to come up with an idea. Gen Z.
Want a new idea, read an old book.
As someone in customer service, I can never find this information when I'm actively looking for it; only when I'm casually scrolling through shorts.
Yes, and it’s been working for me for decades!!