Narcissistic Rage This is What It Looks Like

[@CaitrionaMaeve]

I experienced his narcissistic rage in the car...it was his favourite place to corner me with no escape!

[@christinaufnowski1742]

OMG i go through that sooo much

[@Hunterleanne]

Such a familiar thing I would experience in my relationship with ex narc as well..

[@Thx392]

Alba yes I experienc3d this as a teenager and in 20s with same person will never get in car with them again if I can help it

[@Thx392]

Ali B WW , Fibromyalgia and ME my journey yup and slams on breaks

[@maddybarnette8895]

it is because you cant go anywhere..I have experienced it to...

[@saysHotdogs]

People accused Faye Dunaway of overacting in mommy dearest but it was all very on point.

[@charlenebuyshouses]

Joan Crawford

[@sally4026]

Judy Faye Dunaway acting as Joan Crawford!

[@basedxennial6269]

Would have been funny if her surname was Dingaway

[@prant8998]

She nailed it. With my ex GF it was the same thing over and over. That scene was perfect, and that kid was me, wondering where the hell it was going to end? To everyone out there, if you can, don’t waste another minute of your precious life with these nut jobs. Leave, just leave. You will never figure out the triggers and prevent the next tantrum. They will pull it out of the butt, just to make you miserable. Ms. Nieves, brilliantly dramatizes this issue with the movie clip, but the recepiant takling this abuse over and over is getting severaly damaged mentally and physically. If you constantly adjust your thinking to allow your partner to use you as doormat there is going to be some permanent damage.

[@raini0705]

as someone who has to put up with this kind of rage fairly often, i have to say it's not far off from truth. There's varying degrees of physical abuse involved, but manipulation doesn't necessarily have to involve the physical abuse to cause pain.

[@brendamccormack9325]

I would rather be beaten to death than to ever make excuses, walk on eggshells, change who I really am, dampen my spirit, stop my voice, or lie to cater to the narcissist. .never again..never will I be a victim again.

[@diannebreakfield9980]

OMG You don't know how much I agree with you

[@brendamccormack9325]

Dianne Breakfield thank you..After 20 years of marriage..to a very bad man..I found strength to escape with my male children..only to find ...I've raised more narcissistic men..!! my advice...If you're in a controlling environment. ...get out FAST...before your children learn too many bad ways..then you must spend a lifetime re-educating yourself and your children....very very tough. but do-able

[@BIGDRXXMR444]

Brenda Mc Cormack if u dnt want to be the victim then you got hurt them physically

[@chuviemilope]

This could be said by a narcissist too. Be careful.

[@bleachtroll9726]

Some people are children and have no chance to escape the narcissist or die before they get a chance to.

[@11cor71ll]

I grew up with this kind of anger in our home. I learned to hide as much as possible. My sister actually learned how to rage back. She was the only one that I ever saw that was able to stand up to mom. I Through the years I've come to understand that my mother was just letting her frustrations out on us kids. There was times when we went to bed and counted the stripes on each others back. I found the film a little over the top, in some ways but quite accurate in other ways. From 0 to full blown rage in one little word is all it would take. My sister learned this and I've watched many relationships destroyed through her life. The bible teaches, make not friends with an angry person lest you learn their ways, and get a snare to your soul. So for anyone looking at this article, what are you teaching your children? At 11 min. it was saying about not feeling responsable for the rage, how do you explain that to a 5 year old? At that age, all you can do is endure it.

[@patriciareilly530]

My husband threatened to sell the house because we ran out of ketchup. Twenty minutes of screaming rage.

[@Jasamkarla]

Patricia Reilly I can relate...just dont know how to respond😔 to pay no notice or confront it 😔

[@patriciareilly530]

In my experience, never confront, never defend yourself. When you do that you are assuming that he is interested in the truth, solving the problem, working things out. That is not the case. He is interested in abusing you. I found the best tactic is to agree with everything he says.
He screams that you are a horrible person who is ruining his life: you reply, Yes, that's true and I feel bad about it, but I just can't change. You have just validated him and left him with no place to go for the next attack, because you will only agree again. I know this is counter-intuitive but it works. But this is only a tactic, not a long term solution because it is never, ever, ever going to get better and the only long term solution is your departure.

[@donna1420]

Patricia Reilly so sorry you had to experience that

[@shaquoyag1484]

Patricia Reilly what ??

[@mrdad-zl9zl]

@O.C. Sky my mom worked really hard all the time to support us while my dad worked low paying jobs smoked a lot of weed and spent his money on weed and new guitars not food for us. My mom asked him to help witb groceries and he yelled saying he could feed our family with what we throw away (not true we rarely threw food away) and that maybe my mom should get her "slutty ass daughter" (me, also im my dads daughter as well he just phrased me as "hers") to buy some groceries. I was 17 and never had a boyfriend or a first kiss before. Crazy dude

[@coudgeb]

I'm a survivor of domestic violence and alot of this described my exes. I cried looking at that little girl trying so hard to appease her mom. That's exactly how I felt after his outbursts. And I would scramble to clean up his mess like I had made it. This is so damaging to the soul. I'm constantly working in therapy bc I suffer from PTSD as a result. And how unfortunate that he continues on his destructive paths with more women who don't deserve this. My heart and prayers go out to all who have suffered from this. 💕💕💕

[@missjaszmine1968]

Yes! Thank you for sharing. I've been there too as a child. That's why we need to ban together with survivor assistance organizations to enact a batterer national registry.
Thank you so much for sharing. Healing and helping others with your hard earned wisdom is possible. Please be encouraged. You are never never alone in your experiences. You are more than a conqueror! Blessings be upon you and your revovery.

[@cynthiahytower2665]

coudge b Thank you. This is true for me also. I've been gone from my narcissist 2mths and he hasn't stopped yet. He bogarded his way in my door yesterday and refused to leave. More abuse...

[@stephaniec6458]

Thanks love

[@ingerjohannekrogstad8893]

coudge b I too SURVIVED exes who acts with a primitive RAGE from HELL..Before it...,my mom..

[@christinaufnowski1742]

Omg thats what im going through now...

[@kirsteni.russell5903]

I just realized that my third grade teacher was a narcissist. She kept our class in a state of terror. She would stop the class to target one student with her rage, yelling at the kid and shaking the kid in his or her seat. She picked on some students several times, and on me once. This was at an American elementary school on an air base overseas. I never saw that woman again after my third grade year there, although I continued to attend that school through sixth grade. I hope she was found out and barred from ever teaching a class of vulnerable children again.

[@daeclipse03]

My ex is a covert and a first grade teacher here in NY. These kinds of people got no business being around kids

[@zingerflippinz2066]

I've heard that narcissists make good fertilizer or pig food.

[@IlputocapoMateo]

also business leaders and CEOs...

[@zingerflippinz2066]

You mean slave owners. Never worked for one never will.

[@zingerflippinz2066]

Serial killers are attention starved morons with over-inflated egos. I'd love to be the one that throws the switch, drops the trap door, forgets the pain killer when they are injected. I have ways of execution that makes it not only permanent but eternally memorable. I'd even have it televised. Hungry pigs are one of the best ways to deal with those losers.

[@zingerflippinz2066]

I don't give a rat's ass what you or anyone else thinks about them. They deserve to be pg food and televised while being devoured. They are, at best, cowards but mostly they are just examples of rampant human stupidity. They never select victims capable of fighting beck. The one exception is the girl that got away from fried brain bundy.

[@DavidAKZ]

You cannot fight evil with evil.

[@cassielee1114]

I've been that little girl :( It was the morning of my birthday and I hadn't tidied up some of my toys so my mum basically destroyed my room in anger and then told me to clean it up. The most fucked up thing is she called me down later to open my birthday presents and was really sweet to me, as if nothing had happened.

[@zofiajaneczek184]

Cassie Lee I'm so sorry you had this happen to you. I can relate from things that happened in my past. There was ALWAYS an obsession with things being clean. One thing that was dirty, misplaced in the kitchen, something couldn't be found in the home. All hell broke loose, my dad and me scrambling to appease, freezing or running for cover. It was an all out battlefield that day, with the next day being all kinds of pleasantries as if nothing happened. Everyone sitting at the dinner table and eating in seeming peacefulness. We normally did get fairly decent food the following day and generally some yummy baked goods, cookies, cake. As if that was supposed to make things OK until the tsunami hit again, and it ALWAYS did. It's such a chaotic environment for a child or adult to live in, right is wrong, up is down, perpetual chaos is your actual reality. You over the decades get conditioned to being comfortable in the most hostile environments. You survive that kind of childhood/environment but you're not truly living. I wish you healing and a wonderful life after all the chaos! As survivors we deserve so much better out of life!

[@oliviasmirnoff770]

Zofia Janeczek if only we could stop this violence in the family,how many people traumatized.....I know many ,I m traumatized too....is like a virus of violence in the world.....

[@catdeluxeatday]

Disgusting.

[@sunnydaye5942]

Just a movie??? Oh hell no, it was based on a true story. I lived it with my Narc!!!

[@denisejackson776]

Sunny Daye Exactly, and when Christina came out with these allegations she was met with denial and told she was a liar, surely such a beloved Hollywood Queen cldnt hv a dark side.....

[@sammy1746]

Ya, not just a movie. Poor girl. She actually lived that. Joan Crawford I believe, and her daughter Christina, I think she wrote a book based on her life with her mother. Crazy.

[@lesleygarvs4640]

Me too... All my brothers hit us when we were little out of nowhere

[@daughterofgodwarriorofchrist17]

Been there many times with my narc husband. It must be terrifying for a child. I managed to stop him last time mid rage by turning on my phone recorder. It just shows they can control it if they want to.

[@loverainthunder]

EXACTLY, they don't attack unless they can get away with it. Thank you for posting this.

[@daughterofgodwarriorofchrist17]

1963kungfupanda i believe rages can be controlled with a narc but there are situations where people can lose it such as hormonal or on drugs etc. But in that case they are an adult and responsible to get themselves help if they cant control it. Narcs dont get help for it

[@loverainthunder]

1963kungfupanda
I think you're right about borderlines. I have a seeming borderline sister and I would imagine if someone started recording her she would have kept attacking. But my narcissistic sister would change mid tone. She can be controlled simply by having a second set of eyes around. She'll be a different person.

[@donna1420]

Daughter of God Warrior of Christ yes they know exactly what they are doing

[@kiss4strawberry]

1963kungfupanda Borderlines cannot control their borderline rage since the core of their disorder is emotional instability or in other words the inability to regulate their own emotions (sometimes they go into psychotic state so they lose touch with reality hence why it's called Borderline - they are walking a thin line between neurotic and psychotic).
NPDs on the other hand can and will control their anger if they think they will get caught or if they have to deal with the consequences because of their narcissistic rage. Yes, they are also feeling the anger to the core of their being but if lashing out won't serve them no good in a particular situation they will choose not to express it.

[@loloc5566]

I call this demon possession.

[@ksfishchannel]

lolo c I distinctly remember writing in one of my journals after my mom had had one of her rages "I think my mom is demon possessed."

[@michaelbryan5350]

lolo c you are so right people don’t like what they don’t know and all of this comes from a lie to begin and goes from there and then you become a lair to narcissist to sociopath to psychopath and it starts from a lie and this is why it is on the ten you can only take from yourself until nothing is left.

[@bernhardknabl4587]

There's no demons

[@bernhardknabl4587]

yea and you have never dealt with demons@Deplorable Cat

[@amalyah46]

It is demonic

[@yvonnewilson2242]

This is actually a true story, not just a movie. Joan Crawford was a horrible person.
My story has a dash of guilty pride, guilt only due to me dishing out the physical violence first and I used my gender to do it. But I am also kinda proud.
My ex...Let's call him Jack...went through his narc rage and I just stood there. At first I used to try to appease but after awhile I realized it was a fool's errand, so I would act indifferent. It would piss him off, but it never got past him insulting me and walking out slamming the door behind him. Our relationship was on the rocks at this time and we both knew it.
I don't know what was different concerning this narc rage episode...I don't even remember what triggered it, but I burst out laughing. He got within inches of my face, telling me to stop laughing at him, which made me laugh harder.
He raised his hand to strike me. It was his first and last time.
It was at this moment when Jack knew, he fucked up.
He forgot that I am a former Marine.
I punched him in the throat (we're taught at Marine Combat Training to either go for the eyes or throat---both if you're feeling extra special), and kicked him while he was down. Twice.
I had enough.
He threatened to call the cops. I told him to go ahead, but no cop is going to believe that a woman kicked his ass, and even if they did, they're gonna ask him what did he do to provoke me. I grabbed my phone and called the cops anyway. And sure enough, the cops asked him what he did to provoke me. He tried to play the reasonable one, saying I was crazy and that I had PTSD from being in the Marines. When they talked to me I told them everything that happened. They asked if I would press charges and I said no, I hit him first and since he didn't lay a hand on me it wouldn't be right to charge him. That wasn't the real reason: I made it be known that I was the reason HE didn't get arrested and sully his record with a DV charge.They didn't charge me either. When the cops were leaving, one of them looked at my ex and said, "You pissed off not only a Marine, but one you claimed that had PTSD. Are you crazy or stupid? If I get another call, SOMEONE IS GOING TO JAIL." He turned to me and said "Semper Fi." No surprise---the cops where I lived were all former military, and most are either Marines or Army. Jack left that night and didn't come back until 2 days later. I had neatly packed his shit and set them by the door and changed the locks while he was gone so he just couldn't waltz in. He called before he came and the look on his face was laughably pathetic when he showed up. He tried "hoovering" (I wanna work this out, we can go to counseling). I handed him his stuff, told him that after beating his ass I couldn't see him as a man, then I slammed the door in his face. The different types of bitches and cunts he called me was music to my ears. HE went no contact after that.
Ok...I'm still proud of it. Sue me lol

[@elianaodeleyaisrael5621]

You's a BADD woman!!😊❤

[@mskatonic1]

I love you. You inspire all of us dealing with narcs. Much respect. ❤😙

[@crackedcandy7958]

ooooRAAaaaah

[@aliciadavis3550]

Lol 😂 this made my day

[@JC-bg7pe]

When a woman has had enough...!
It's OK to be proud of standing up for yourself and your right to be treated with love and respect.

[@motowngirl5891]

I told him to say sorry to me one time for being mean to me, his face turned purple and said " I don't have to sit here and listen to this

[@baconcat02]

Mine said he had nothing to be sorry for, even though he flipped his lid over nothing and went overboard. He then got upset I wasn’t going to say sorry for being fed up with his narcissistic abuse

[@anamericanman]

I saw so much narcissistic rage growing up, this is so profoundly hard to watch. I had three or four recurring nightmares for 30 years.

[@FromSurvivingToThriving]

Im so sorry to hear that! I can so relate!!!

[@katrinachristoffersen6225]

A few years ago, my ex narc accused me of stealing something valuable of his, which I didn't. His accusations went as far as saying that I sold this valuable item on the black market! Wtf!! I told him many times that I didn't steal it and I didn't know where it was, but he refused to believe me. He was filled with so much rage, that he pulled out all the clothes from the closet and pretty much tore up the whole bedroom (I'm the one who had to clean up the mess he made afterwards). He was in full rage mode with the screaming and cursing!! His actions caused me so much fear and anxiety that I started to cry. The next day, I texted his parents to see if he left the valuable item at their house (they live in a different state). His mom texted me back with a picture of the item saying it was in their garage the whole time! I immediately showed the pic and text to my ex. I also demanded an apology from him for accusing me of something I didn't do. Unfortunately, he screamed and cursed at me. He also broke the computer chair by smashing it's feet to the floor and then yelled that he was going to break up with me!! He didn't break up with me that day. He used that tactic to scare me and made me feel like I did something wrong. Unfortunately, I didn't leave the narc till a few years later and I've been no contact for 3 months! 😊

[@ShineMedia1]

Yes it can take a while to leave because you give someone a chance, you can be traumatized by the extremeness of the rage, you're confused etc. but thankfully you got out. No contact is the only way. Stay well, stay no contact and you will thank every day he's not in your life. I did. 🕊️

[@bradmcewen]

There isn't any memory more profound than when those rages come out of the blue. The shock to your heart, mind & soul is debilitating. Yes, over the most stupid things. But it doesn't matter. Reaction seekers. When you realize it's like a bipolar, drug withdrawl, turrets like combo there's no logic. None. That's really why it's unexpected & so damaging. Any one of these events should end a relationship. Never physical but emotionally devastating. Even after a day of catering to her endless whims & providing transportation, diner & a compassonite ear. No boundary is sacred. No empathy. No remorse. I believe they someway thru an inner demon dont believe they deserve kindness. So make things familiar in a chaotic way. Never ever give benefit of doubt more than once. Life is way to short to begin with & these people will shorten it more substantially. The kicker is at end of night when they want a hug goodnight & tell you to call tomorrow. And for a while....you do. Omg....

[@findfaith1480]

Brad McEwen
Yeah the kick is so painful bcos it happens when u least expected it.
By now everyone aware states "no contact "is the only way out. But easier said than done!
It's not the years in ur Life that counts, but the Life in the years u lived. In a Narc-relationship there is no life at all.
Victims just run for life as fast as possible.

[@stacylamb980]

Brad McEwen my friend who is a metaphysician stated that Narcissist s have fragmented souls that are shattered beyond repair. Occasionally they will act "okay" if they feel like you are leaving them. The victims of the narcs are empaths and yes our souls get fragmented from their abuse. Self care, meditation, energy work is so important. We need to reprogram our thoughts to get through it. Good luck. Sending positive vibes your way. I know the struggle is real. Our bodies ate in fight or flight mode which can cause a lot of illness in our bodies.

[@bradmcewen]

Stacy Lamb That is very generous shared info said in a way that created more breakthrough. A well lit path to journey. The further we all go the more it's just a disease we have beaten, now vaccinated & immune. Thank you so much for taking the time to post.

[@donnachan77]

Brad McE

[@joeldwest]

Phoneti physix trust that there are plenty of women not like this, do not go for the most beautiful....

[@dlissett821]

Watching that didn’t shock me, went through it so much as a child and early adult life with my father! It is like I switched off the fear factor, numbness became the dysfunctional coping strategy. Then when the beating of the child started it really bothered me and brought back the many, many times of physical abuse on top of the alcoholic NPD parental abuse. It took me until my early 40’s to realise I had been abused in many ways by my father but also by my mother the enabler. Now at 50 I am using some of the pain to write (as an empath and sensitive creative guy) including poetry to give others hope. I am trying to heal after a life of loneliness and utter confusion and for the first time connect to me and accept I have the right to love and be loved, instead of being told I was worthless from 4-20+. My sister is partially estranged from me due to me denying years ago our toxic parents. I have been involved with narcissistic people and got severely hurt plus I have anger management issues since it’s like my father was a poor role model for the healthy expression of anger since he had to have a perfect world or we had to fake this to the neighbours.

[@riccimortis3685]

"I am using some of the pain to write (as an empath and sensitive creative guy) including poetry to give others hope."
Well done =)

[@HappyMomma412]

I am so sorry you had to go through this. It is confusing a lot. I am glad you are working at freeing yourself from this. 🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@homiekeen23]

Same situation here 😣. Thank you for sharing your story, I'm 27 and feel that my life is hopeless, I'm so numb that I haven't laughed in years. My father is still around and my younger siblings still live with him. I feel so helpless and broken

[@jamessutton9874]

I regret to say I lived with a very verbal abusive father. There were times I was beaten but the beating wasn't as bad as the verbal abuse. I became just like him until one day 30 years ago I realized I was becoming him. I quickly changed, took me a while though but I stopped beating my kids my 2 boys, I wouldn't do it anymore. I saw my father beat my mother and I thought it was okay to beat on women. I am 64 years old and I have a fit with my daughter when she even yell at my granddaughter. My daughter whom I never as much as spanked her have the nerve to spank my Granddaughter. I thank God for changing me, there is a saying that things happen for a reason.

[@barbarabadham1536]

I am a clinical psychologist, and I so appreciate your posting this--you're spot on. When I was on the receiving end of this from my best friend of 40+ years, I couldn't believe it--and I was afraid for my safety. When that kind of anger takes over, unprovoked by the recipient, never waste a moment wondering if was "something I did." It wasn't. The amazing enormity of that person's reaction is not about you, but all about him or her. By breaking off our relationship as if with napalm, he saved me the trouble of trying to reconcile gently (which was my initial response).

[@paulbrookfield4133]

@zyphoid666 No, not really. Using the clip from the movie as an example - what justifies that level of reaction, to a child, over coat hangers?
If the incredible reason doesn't instantly come to mind, then it is on the abuser, not somehow on the victim for being so 'bad' or 'toxic' a person that they would somehow create this disproportionate response somehow. That's what Barbara meant here.

[@cyndimoring9389]

Barbara Badham the big difference is: do we believe we are responsible for their rage or do we know we aren't? When we think we are, we have stuff to work on within ourselves. When we know we aren't, we have self-esteem and self knowledge.

[@stewmacgregor3617]

I never thought of my mother as a narcissist, but she would 100% fly into these rages quite often still does. It's so frightening when you're young.

[@rosannamiranda4620]

. yeah true my mom dose Same even I am older now my brother one her side he blames me for my mom the nar
My brother can be nar too
My mom blame me and sister for everything
And calls bad names
Sometimes wakes up in bad mood yelling or having rude attuitdes
Some time she go sleep mad she mood most of time. One minute nice mom and next minute evil mom
Me and sister use my mom behavior
Half my mom side family like that :(
Me and sister has same dad he was alcoholic and he was un faithful to my mom
They divorce when I was around age 4 or 5
And when I was middle school my dad remarried his
wife told him.he can't have anything do us any more my brother dad abuse my mom and brother when he kid
Years later my mom left my brother day
My mom taken care us growing up
Now my is getting old and sister take care her. Mom
She never change she never be give is real sorry. If mom did something bad us we tell that was. Not nice she say get over it
My mom favorite words
Get over it
Cry baby
I don't care
Leave me alone
I am not saying sorry so get over it now
Ugly
I don't want see face
If we make mistakes seriously retarded
stupid
:(

[@laurawhite4118]

@@rosannamiranda4620 she saying to you what she thinks of herself.sad for you and her.all you can do is be kind and love yourself.

[@Russophile30]

My dad and sister are like this, but not as severe as the movie clip scene.

[@rocker1889]

Ideally the narcissist gets a heart attack during a rage. I would just watch while the narcissist struggles to rage in the throes of a cardiac event...with a smile on my face.

[@caitlinpeters6004]

My sister and I were watching this together and were extremely triggered during the clip. This is our mother. She was sometimes physically abusive and went into rages, and we were scared of her. We had to stop the clip. So intense. This stuff is real.

[@sunshinenyc007]

That gave me anxiety

[@recoveringsoul755]

Janny Jan That was really triggering for me too. I'm away from my spouse, but he slandered me and took my children. I can't think about it or I won't function at all.

[@lorena7747]

Omg, exactly

[@victoriabachlotte3321]

Watching this freaks me out. My dad was bipolar/borderline. He was USMC. Childhood was Marine corps boot camp hell for children. He did this to me over a dried water spot on a spoon. Another time he come got me out of school because my bed was made incorrectly. The verbal asault has effected me far deeper than the physical abuse did.

[@christinaufnowski1742]

me too i couldnt watch it

[@notyourfrind9415]

It took me back to a dark place growing up with my narc mom.

[@shirleymadiva6886]

Watching and listening to this just made me shiver! I am so thankful and blessed to be free from this kind of life! It's so sad to live like this. Walking on eggshells and never knowing when Dr. Jeckell or Mr. Hyde will show up out of the blue!! I love your work you help so many! Thanks 💕

[@beyondrepair8949]

Same with me. Sorry to all the people that had to grow up with this.

[@jamessutton9874]

It's amazing to know that this happened to us people, I always thought it was just in my family, now I am understanding why there is so much anger in this world. Thank God for these video's. We can talk about it now to one another, before these video's I did not know what was going to become of me, but I have put everything in the hands of God.

[@DJ-ts5uv]

Omg the rage in the car. So true.

[@donna1420]

More Love i had this today. just awful 😓

[@prant8998]

The car meltdown, so true. You’re trapped, you can’t get away. When they can control you, they can get their supply of sadistic pleasure. If I was at her place, I would just get my stuff and leave. If I was at my house the key was to get her out and back to her place so I can leave. There’s the boundary, if she goes angry, I leave. Sure, you could sit there and be screamed at for no reason, but what does that do you? That has to have a deleterious effect, and there’s the deal breaker. Leave.

[@marywilson4938]

They also speed and follow too closely so you are not safe

[@davidhinkson8856]

Developed claustrophobia because of that.

[@TheSepia1]

A lot of this is my mother.

[@MrLeonightis]

me too this is spot on what I had to put up with

[@keithmoriyama5421]

A lot of this is my wife's daughter-- words out of her mother's mouth.

[@tourist1313]

Me too ☹️

[@lorena7747]

Same... It's painfully accurate

[@prittyugly86]

Omg right? Growing up was hell for me. I just wanted her to leave me alone! I had more to say but after that mommy dearest scene, I think I'm having a flash back.... Smh!!!

[@misha2197]

This was my father, I can't express how watching this, it was literally my childhood. :(

[@sophialewis5474]

So so sorry. I beg in the name of mercy that you are well and truly free of this torment in your mind spirit and physical.

[@askyeshka726]

I don't understand why people excuse their behavior. They feel entitled to abuse and it is a tactic and manipulation and intimidation maneuver to make you do what they want you to do. L'Chaim

[@riccimortis3685]

Because they are the peaceable and agreeable ones, surrounding a conflict-oriented disagreeable...so the former will seek tranquility at great cost.

[@brendafaithful8267]

My husband blows from 0-10 in 3 seconds over anyything and can last for hours.

[@ralph57100]

get out. they don’t change, only get worse.

[@mdee860]

Mine goes from 0 to 100 full blown rage. His face contorts into what I call the Angry rat face. One time I thought he was going to hit me. I said "Don't do it. The cops will be here so fast your head will spin. You'll go to jail, lose your License, your job, everything." He stopped. He is much larger & stronger than I am & I was scared, but had to act cool. These people suck & will never change. Working on trying to leave. It is hard because I am injured & can no longer work. Somehow I will find a way. 🙏🏼 Hugs to all empaths here ❤

[@clarelovescats3299]

@@mdee860 How are you doing? I hope you are safe and have left.

[@gabrielamcconnell9929]

Wow Michelle, that movie describes it absolutely perfectly accurately! This evil woman is my mum to a tee. It reminds me of when i was 11/ 12 years old, my mum and dad would go on holiday together ( never ever took me or any of my brothers or sisters with them, that would be a wast of money) but when she got back she would ALWAYS have a temper tantrum just like that one ! She liked going on holiday to Greece but i think she didn't like flying, I much later discovered. So as soon as she got back she would fly into a rage, the pretext was usually that we had not done a good enough job in having the whole house spring cleaned for her when she got home. Well this went on year after year and no matter how well we scrubbed and cleaned, moving every pice of furniture out, cleaning it and putting it back exactly where it came from to the millimetre, she ALWAYS went berserk. Well one year the house was perfect she couldn't find a thing wrong with it ( we got real good at cleaning as children ) and as she dashed round the house desperate to find something, getting more and more furious because she couldn't find anything, she came upon the draw where all the board games and playing cards were kept. Not special cards just ordinary playing cards and games that everyone used, she ripped the cards from the draw and threw them at me shouting " YOU HAVE BEEN PLAYING CARDS WHILE I WAS AWAY, HOW DARE YOU!!!!!!! blah, blah, blah" !!!!!!!!! Well i never forgot that event, i was just a kid and didn't know anything about narcs until about 43 years later but i knew something was very wrong with her, but what could i do i was 11/12 years old. There were many, many other things but that clip really struck a chord for me ! The clip expertly shows us that the ( mum ? EVIL WHITCH ) does not love the child because no genuinely, loving, caring nurturing and sane human being would ever treat anyone like that, let alone your adored, treasured, wonderful child. The child only represents a necessary prop used to try to create a false image to the outside world and herself, about how wonderful a mother the mother thinks she is. And of course she uses the child as a very convenient receptacle for shit dumping her internal SHIT onto !!!!!!!!!! We were and still are ( she is 90 f***ing 5 and even more evil than ever) all being emotionally abused and were physically abused. When i finally acknowledged that to myself, a year ago it did help me detach from the abuse a little, but i still find it hard to not react to her evil, evil words !

[@denisejackson776]

Gabriela McConnell I'm so sorry you endured that

[@gabrielamcconnell9929]

denise, many thanks, that clip breaks my heart the insane cruelty of that parent is incomprehensible to me. I will never be able to understand or forgive disordered people and the evil behaviour they display. Many thanks again and wishing you health and happiness. Gabby😊

[@no_peace]

Why do they always want children to clean everything all the time? What is it with cleaning? We had something similar with the trips and cleaning (or just cleaning generally) but just a less extreme reaction, and we never got good at cleaning the same way no one else in my family is good at cleaning (and they definitely never taught any of us how to manage a household)

[@bigfoot91]

my story. the evil witch is now `100 with my two sister who never married nor left home take care of her.

[@dianneb2224]

Xpenguin17revived - That’s because people like that suck the life from you so they can live a long long life.

[@DAVID-cs5vi]

Bad advice! I think people need to literally walk away from anyone who is acting out in the form of Narcissistic Rage. They want and need an audience and the best thing you can do is to not provide one for them. For children that may not be possible, but for adults it is the smart thing to do. They need to learn there are consequences for their outbursts. The very worst thing you can do is to tolerate inappropriate behavior. Period!

[@solitajre222]

This only applies to a situation where you are able to leave on your own accord:
Observe without reacting. Complete silence and neutral expression to the best of your ability. When they stop bombarding you with questions that you aren't really meant to answer (How could you do this? Do you have any idea? bla bla etc.) and ask a question that they want and expect you to answer: Let your neutral face go and crack a big smile, laugh at them and leave. This is the ultimate insult to their ego and self-image. They played their entire "hand" of projection, insults and abuse. And you laugh at them. They are naked before you. Their best attempt at reaching you backfired by magnitudes.
To add insult to their injury, try to catch their outburst on camera. This will make them tremble every time you cross their minds in any situation. The video itself will have substantially higher value to them than to others. Because to them it is evidence of their behavior. To others it's simply "Some wierd person having a tantrum" which is a deathsentence in their mind to their ego and image.

[@shaquoyag1484]

Kids can’t move out on their own

[@MultiJean19]

How can you walk away when it your supervisor? The supervisor I got threatens to take anyone to team if we don’t do what she says to do. And she yells in store in front of customer and cuss out loud too. The managers won’t do nothing about it

[@GOLDENEYEAL]

i finally realized my parents were narcissists thanks to videos like this one, after many years and went no contact. this video was very hard to watch and so accurate. my question is this: how can we as a society dispose of these demons who appear human? is going no contact the only solution? people go to jail for arguably stupid stuff, yet we let people like this roam around free? i cannot accept that, there's got to be a way to address this issue

[@safeinmyheart1]

Thank you for the video. I think it’s important to point out that narcissists can be very controlled and subtle in their anger... something as innocent as asking why they didn’t respond to your call or text can trigger them.They might address you by name, which creates a ‘tone’ and then say something like, ‘well, I have a life’ or ‘you’re needy’. It will feel like a slap in the face... almost like a chill comes over you... they make you question your values, even tho you know deep down their behavior is hurtful or neglectful. Their attacks can be very calm and insipid... almost casual and dismissive, yet deadly beneath the surface.

[@amandaperry9014]

This video has helped me put to rest the one question I've had since childhood. "Why didn't my father love me and what made him hate me so bad? ". Thank you for this explaination and making clear what my role was.

[@amycuaresma]

How to end any argument in three sentences:
1) I'm sorry you feel that way, I have no right to tell you how to feel about me.
2) I guess I'll have to accept your faulty perception of me.
3) Your anger is not my responsibility.
Option # 2). This takes practice...you must say it in a non sarcastic way and from a point of sincerity.
"Have I done something to upset you? "
Oftentimes this alone will help a person to check themselves. Perhaps you have done something to upset them and you may not be aware. This lends an opportunity to engage in a meaningful resolution. Oftentimes the person will realize that you are not actually the issue and that their rage is something they don't like about them selves.
The key is to not let them trigger you to engage. Usually this behavior is due to some internal insecurities that one cant process internally so they project it outwards as a defensive mechanism.

[@listfamaccount7400]

Any of those 3 sentences would have made my narc rage harder.

[@feltygoosehead7460]

BOTH of my parents raged at me like this. Most of my exes, too. During a car rage, one of my exes put me in a headlock and covered my eyes while I was driving. I ended up driving my car off a small cliff. He was willing to endanger his own life just for the "high" he got from arguing.

[@cyndimoring9389]

Felty Goosehead Spot On! It's an addiction, a drug, to emotionally control others!!!!!!!!! We must defuse, detach and demystify the whole thing.

[@moonlight-lz9qt]

Wow that was hard to watch, poor child 😢. I thought I was healed but that clip made me cry.

[@magnessko]

Me too. Except it was my father.

[@JaydeNicolexx]

Aicha S yes that was crazy and scary!! Get away

[@kidsmoked]

Aicha S Yes, it was really negligent of her not to tell us it was on a child.

[@magnessko]

Common. We are adults aren't we? You can always skip or pass. If it rised emotions maybe that is good? It shows that there is still healing to be done.I was moved to tears also but I wouldn't blame author. That is what narcs do, and we here are dealing with our stuff don't we? Good luck and best wishes.

[@derekamanwiththegivennamej1082]

+rainybroons it was from a movie:mommy dearest, Joan Crawford

[@TheTruth24Seven]

this was so accurate it made me remember things i forgot from my narcissist mother

[@FromSurvivingToThriving]

I hope it was helpful!!!

[@dawnruhl8405]

I lived that childhood.

[@dawnruhl8405]

+Zyzyzx Zyzer My little brother did that. He was just like my mom.

[@sophialewis5474]

Then I weep and stand in awe of your strength if you did not get ravaged by this treatment. What courage.

[@arayofsunshine4556]

I’m sorry that happened 😢 You didn’t deserve that .

[@k.upward]

Me too

[@KeepQuestioning243]

So hard to watch that movie clip. I lived that growing up.
Thank you for this video - I understand things so much better now.
* crying *

[@MrLeonightis]

The good old inspection , anything they could find to set them off , and they always found something!

[@Kenzofeis]

MrLeonightis
Yes, that damn military.
Well, it seems now more and more are becoming aware of this so it is no longer kept in the coffers of psychiatry.

[@angelsndaisies6188]

My dad and my ex-husband to a tee. My dad took ALL the food out of the refrigerator in a rage and through all over the dining room and kitchen. There was like mayo and stuff all over the wall and floor, a huge mess. Then after he did that he wouldn't let us clean it for I think a couple days (can't remember how long but it was gross) and said that he wanted to leave it there so everyone can see "what I made him do".
My ex-husband flipped out over the size of the spoon I pulled out of the drawer to use for the coffee and sugar I just made. It was just a little bigger than normal but not like a big spoon. He said I did it on purpose because I knew it wouldn't fit in his thermos but I had no idea of course. I just grabbed a spoon for the damn coffee I just made!! But yeah those rages are terrible to live through and grow up in. Of course even though when dating my husband and he was the "perfect guy", he had to turn out like my dad. So I grew up with that then lived with it for 18 years. I lost my sanity, FOR REAL. I developed psychotic depression and started hallucinating. All the abuse and inability to do anything right. All the gaslighting. I couldn't do things like grocery shop anymore because I was just unable to make choices and just standing there looking at the selection of food not knowing if I'd pick the right thing. It was hell. Then I had a spiritual awakening which subsecquently led me RIGHT to the book by Patricia about Verbal Abuse (can't remember her last name) but I do remember that I had to rip the cover off to read it and hide it. I remember wondering why she put VERBAL ABUSE so big on the cover when people reading it like me had to hide these kinds of things.
So that knowledge let to some healing and I left him, which is a TREMENDOUS feat in of itself because I had been so scared to be on my own, unable to function and think, unable to know what was reality and what wasn't. I was MESSED UP. But that spiritual awakening changed my life and empowered me. I'll never forget the first time I just took off, got on an airplane and flew across the country to a spiritual retreat, and I didn't ask my husband I just did it. The little things I swear. Being able to go from gate to gate at the airport, figure out where I'm supposed to be... all of these things were like huge victories to me! It's pretty amazing, so many just get on planes and fly and think nothing of it LOL. To me, it was the most life changing thing in my life!!! After I ACCOMPLISHED that, I was liberated and free. I then spent the next two years just absorbing all the information I could on Verbal Abuse and Narcissistic abuse and the recover and healing.
So two years I stayed while I did that, then I just grabbed my daughter (14 yrs old) and just grabbed the clothes we needed and left town. Everything that happened, step by step, was in such Divine Order and I knew how loved and cared for I was by God (not religious) and he totally took me under his wing and even though I hadn't worked for 20 years, He sent someone to me that gave me everything I needed to start my life over, all the money I needed, and all I had to do in return was join the prayer group and I was HAPPY to do that. I was not in any cult or religion or organized group. It was just a few people that came into my life and it was amazing and I knew, every step was God directing me and orchestrating things and even rearrainging the universe so everything happened perfectly for me.
If it weren't for all that abuse, I don't think I could've had that Divine connection to God and my angels. I was so broke down that there was nothing in the way, no pride, no egostistical stuff, just like the "meek inheriting the earth" kind of thing. I'm not "grateful" for the abuse but I just know things happened because of the life I had. I just made me who I am, very spiritual close to God and happy, never even thinking I need anything from another person, not when I have that, and His light, comfort, holding me on His lap like his long lost daughter that He was so glad to have back as he held me tight to Him. God I had a hard life. But I just wouldn't change it if it were to change anything that followed.

[@peacehappiness3118]

Chela Morya.......Your comment gave me confirmation of what I need to do in my life! I am so grateful that you shared your story! I have read so many comments over the months and when I really needed confirmation from God I saw your comment it is exactly my entire situation right now. Once again thank you! I’m so happy you got out of your situation and your at peace. I pray that God continue to heal you and bless you!

[@albusdumbledore3782]

Chela Morya: I’m really happy for you right now. I just left my boyfriend after only three months. He violently yelled at me one day - like Mommy Dearest. It was like a Mack truck hitting me saying what are you doing in this relationship? I believe that was God. I am just starting to read a teaching bible and it’s wonderful and I’m happy! 😋

[@ItsAnOldCroneLife]

Oh, god, when it showed the children cowering, it triggered me. Not angry - I was expecting it. I started shaking and had tears running down my face, because my narc mom literally would wake us up in the middle of the night and yell about how messy the house was and make us wake up and clean it. Sometimes, she'd make us clean even the walls, would grab our bedding out from under us and say it was dirty and needed to be washed. I wet the bed as a very young child, and she would yank my bedding out from under me while shaming me and saying I was doing it on purpose to make HER life harder. She never hit us (at least not for this), but her rage just scared me so much, my first instinct was to do what she said to appease her and be able to sleep. For years, I had a hard time sleeping, because I would feel anxiety from this.

[@Donna777]

So sad!! I am so sorry you had to endure this!! :(

[@w1975b]

to think that unfit people can have kids and abuse them in such ways....shouldn't happen

[@ghosted1662]

For me, Mommie Dearest is the ultimate horror movie. My mom physically resembles Joan Crawford too. It's so scary. I was just a little kid. Who does that? Watching the movie does feel validating though, for years I blamed myself. I thought I was a weak, lazy, unlovable, ungrateful person. Now I know that is not normal parenting behavior.

[@ItsAnOldCroneLife]

I used to wish she would hit us and leave bruises, so I could have proof. They make us keep the secret of their abuse of us, and we have no one to turn to. Then we blame ourselves, because we feel we deserved it. :'(

[@ellyess7203]

Michele, I too could not watch this. I needed to check something for my reply above but I could not watch the film. I am still shaking all over, feeling sick. I cried and cried when the little girl was struck but I still tried not to make a noise just as I used to have to with my Narcissist Mother. I have had so many Narcissists in my life, I sometimes feel the numbers are under estimated. I am so sorry for you, Michele, you poor little girl. All I can say is, now you are old enough to look after yourself so make sure every day you tell yourself you are worthy of lots of love, the best gentle care and you will make sure your life is as happy as possible. Please take care of yourself my dear.

[@kellarenna]

Omg. This scene triggered me. It is just like the abuse we endured as children with my father. The unbelievable amount of rage over small things that turned into physical abuse. It was a truly terrifying rage I've never seen in my life. Constantly. No wonder I'm struggling with a narcissistic emotionally abusive man 5 years and counting. I really need help.

[@ellekay852]

Thank you so much for this video! That scene from Mommy Dearest was a scene from my relationship. The invisible dirt on the bathroom tiles and ripping my clothes out of the closet for absolutely no reason, so scary. But What you said at the end about cars sent chills down my spine. I really haven’t heard others mention my narcissist’s favourite torture chamber: the car. The rage attacks in cars haunt me. A year later, I still have episodes of panic in cars, even with longtime friends and family members. If my ex was driving, he would drive 100 miles an hour and torment me and rip me apart emotionally until I was in pieces (I have a fear of bridges and he would intentionally drive over one and tell me that I should jump off of it because I’m such a pathetic loser), if I was driving, he would sometimes cover my eyes or yell horrible terrible insults at me to induce an anxiety attack. It got so bad that I would have a panic attack driving 3 blocks to the grocery store with him. I feel their rage gets exponentially worse with time, and again, for no apparent reason. Thank you so much for doing what you do, I love your channel and have gained such great insights!

[@patriciagaskins5732]

What i'm about say is not funny, there was a time when my ex narc was yelling at me and I just sat there not saying anything,what I did next was look him in the eye and screamed real loud. Believe or not it worked he shut the hell up and began sweeping the floor, I didn't here a peep out of him the rest of that evening. I had saw a video that stated if I ape him then he will perceive exactly how he sound. On another occasion I found out he was cheating so I just wanted to leave,he threw me against the wall and stated that I wasn't going anywhere. I zapped the hell out and snatched all his shelves out of the wall he looked at me like I was crazy, I told him that I was not afraid of him and that I'm not this weak person that he thought i was. He looked at me and stated that he was afraid of me. Though he begged me to stay I left, and it's been nine months since that day. He contacted me last week trying to hoover me back in, we loved bomb back and forwards . He didn't know that I was onto his sick mind games, at the end of the day I let him have it. I verbally abused him like the crap he is! He started whining like a baby saying "why are you talking to me this way? I already apologized. I told him " I accept your apology cause I have to but sometimes it's not enough especially when you no empathy. He actually started crying like I was suppose to believe his empathy, he was crying cause he know that he lost a valuable supply. I'm not a Narc but it dam sure felt good giving him a taste of his own medicine, it's been four days since I talked to him on the phone; I have completely deleted him. Looking forward to the future with great promise, I believe that God will bless me with a wonderful man who knows and appreciate my worth. However I still will be aware of the red flags.

[@erlethepearl]

Thank you, Michele. You have helped me understand what's happened to me.

[@larklwinslow9333]

Dad set my oldest brother on fire in a rage....how was my brother not going to take that personally?

[@loverainthunder]

Its personally physically and soul destroying for the target. It rips your life away but it's their fault and their problem and not deserved and it's not a reflection of who we are whatsoever. So yeah, it is not personal that they want to burn rape etc consume you its that they are literal monsters who personally (their person!!) belongs UNDER the JAIL if not executed. I"m so sorry to read about your brother.I hate these effers so much and what they get away with doing to children, what I and my sibs went through and apparently you and yours is unspeakably evil. It never belonged on us or to us.

[@aleph-tavunutterable1585]

+Larklouise Winslow oh my gosh I am so sorry for what happened to your brother. Is he ok now?

[@michaelangelus7355]

Larklouise: Your dad was not in his right mind. He had a mental disability and was possibly under demonic influence. I know because....I had a father who did crazy, cruel mean, sadistic things to me and my brother.

[@aleph-tavunutterable1585]

+Michael Angelus same here - I think demonic possession and malignant narcissism is describing the same phenomenon.

[@markedgette4311]

Larklouise Winslow are you serious?

[@shirleymurphy1958]

A picture of my mother at some levels . I lived in fear of her. But always tryed too keep peace and happiness. I became a clown too lighten the moods around her. I am 70 now and see and feel the damage this did . Thanking God for his intervention in my life .

[@kaukosaari8920]

i have to admit that i have witnessed such rage from individuals

[@jofish420]

The night of my ex's attack, started in late afternoon, I came home from the store, everyting was calm. He then said I'm going to bed...at 4pm! I asked him, "are you feeling sick?" He said "No..I'm in waiting mode." I knew then that something was up..eggshell time. After a few mins, I walked into the bedroom and asked if he wanted something to eat. He said no, but then said give me some cookies and milk. So I did. I knew to leave him alone. But at 6:30, I needed to take a shower, and when I walked in there and undressed, he leaped out of bed suddenly, and shouted.."I'm tired of no one listening to me! No one cares!" and left the room and slammed the door. So I went in to shower. He came in briefly, I could hear him, and he changed clothes. When I got done, I came into the livingroom, and saw that my laptop and cell phone were gone. I asked where is my comp and cell? He said, "You don't have to worry about that, and by the way I have your car keys too!" I said give me my keys back! He said NO! His back was to me as he sat in the recliner. He then grabbed my purse, dumped it out on the floor, and found part of the money I had hidden away that I earned doing side work. He screamed.."You told me that you only had $1! Where did this money come from?" I told him, "since you take all my money, I put this away." He then screamed at me, "YOU'RE A F*CKING LIAR!" I then grabbed my purse, and the physical violence ensued as he tried to and proclaimed that he would break my arm if I didn't give it back. This is as far as I will go...with the narrative, but it ended up with him shoving me into a divider, forced me to stand behind that divider, while he packed his stuff, and then tried to strangle me, when I tried to go beyond the imaginary line he drew. I was ordered to clean up the mess..he broke an ashtray, and had hangers all over the floor. Police asked me why didn't I run? Well..I was being held in the room, with no escape. I was terrified, but remained calm, since I didn't want to incite him further. It's that moment when you realize that the one that was supposed to love you, turns on you, has the evil eyes, with his face all contorted. I"m away from him 9 months now, awaiting my divorce to be final. No one should ever be subjected to this type of violence, and if you fear your partner, it's NO GOOD! GET OUT, privately plan your escape. I felt relief when they arrested him..not sadness. Yet, when he got out, he went around telling people that I was the crazy one, and he just put me in a choke hold to subdue me! So there ya go..Narcissism in its most evil! I didn't even know about narcissism until after, when someone suggested I look into it, to help me realize what I was really dealing with! I didn't know...I thought I could help him...I cannot.

[@FromSurvivingToThriving]

I'm so sorry for what you went through! I'm glad you are no longer in a dangerous and abusive situation!! I truly hope the best for you! And it's true most dont know anything about narcissism until near the end or after its over - I can completely relate with that

[@jofish420]

Thank You Michelle! :D I'm now enjoying my freedom, and rebuilding my own life.

[@denisejackson776]

Oh, yes that UNADULTERATED RAGE!! And that contorted demonic possessed face, I'd never seen anyone look so evil and ugly standing in my very presence, it was so ugly, terrifying, and contorted involuntarily I gasped and turned away, I cldnt look it in the eyes..

[@Stacey_Hunter]

jofish420 that's madness what you went through but iam genuinely SO glad you are free from the abuse! I wish you all the best on your new found freedom and happiness, well done you for having the courage to free yourself, take care, and please don't ever go back,!! All the best x

[@jofish420]

Denise Jackson Yes..those eyes! I was in a state of shock..I am disabled to boot, so "fighting back" can't happen, I just wanted to stay alive!

[@u.m.a.8119]

Your advice of observing the rage without absorbing is great....unless you’re 6 years old...and it continues until you can try to save your soul and sanity by just running away when you’re old enough to get away.

[@dlkcoil01]

Memories of my own childhood right in a movie. All too real! My wife and her mother are just like Mommy Dearest.
I just cannot believe I got so deeply involved with such people.

[@joancrawford1146]

My mom is a narc (diagnosed), my husband is one and he learned it from the most grandiose one I’ve ever met, his own mother. I feel like I’m crazy for not seeing the signs before I married my husband. Trying to leave him now, as killing myself would give him too much satisfaction.

[@koalabar5595]

I wish i had what information 25 years before. would help so much, but it's good to know in the end what realy happened.

[@FromSurvivingToThriving]

I'm sorry for what you went through - but now you can heal the inner wounds and develop one of the strongest loves there is - self love!!

[@koalabar5595]

That's true. But live without those kinds of individuals would be waaaay more fun :-). I like your channel a lot, been watching over 3 Months, helps me. Keep it up. Greetz from Germany :-).

[@RotterStudios]

Great video. I hate that mommy dearest scene! Saw it as a kid and it bothered me a lot. My wife acts out like that once a year or so. I’m always on eggshells and I feel it’s my fault. I found your channel and it has helped me. She attacked me early this year and was arrested. I felt bad for that but the law takes it seriously. I’m looking at divorce...after all....that’s one thing she always threatened me with, at least twice a year. I’m a laid back person and she says to others I’m not. She is the only one I cannot communicate with. I can never get through. She never listens. She walks away or tells me to shut up. She’s nice to others but not me. When she is nice to others it seems a little fake. I’m going for counseling on my own and that has helped. Thanks again!

[@aroasjourney]

Narcissist done look this scary! Don’t imagine them scary before hand they actually look like the most compassionate caring people! The surprise comes later

[@HIGHLANDER_ONLY_ONE]

Speaking of driving... my husband was mad at me fur who knows what readon - again... So, while traveling on "windy" roads to a lodge in a rural town, he drove CRAZY, kustvto scare us, because there were mostly cliffs with deep ravines on most of the road. My little girl (3) was sleeping, my son (5) who has pretty much always been very aware of his mortality and has been afraid of tall bridges, speedy cars, heights, etc., since he was 18 months was TERRIFIED, my oldest daughter, by a previous marriage (19) was praying for dear life, making peace with her maker, thinking thday we were going to die that night.
Since he knew that would scatevme, he didn't care fur the children, and their safety, nor ours. So, to calm him down, although I was genuinely TERRIFIED, I pretended to have fallen asleep, and I kept as calm as I could, and once he bought my act, he calmed down. I faked it, until I made it, because once he called down, we all did a bit, but we NEVER forgot that day. I had differed many, many more instances of ABUSE by this man, but when you mentioned, "fighting in cars," I had a flashback of the car ride from HE'LL!!!
Now that I'm DONE, and I'm finally healed, and truly ready for our divorce, he's been love bombing me at nausseum. I'm still financially trapped, but I don't care... The kids are older, they adore me, and they can speak for themselves. I'm not afraid... I'm so DONE, and so OVER him and this whole mess...!!! I don't even hate him, I'm genuinely indifferent...
Much strength and love to you all, and wish me luck! ☺

[@karent3004]

HIGHLANDER . Good luck and love to you Sweetie, you are obviously one strong woman indeed. Hugs to you..🤗

[@symphytumtribe1582]

I know this is late but hoping that by this time the situation has improved for you. Sending healing and love .

[@dennisleporte2327]

Very astute and on point. Add alcohol and drugs and you have the perfect storm.

[@bintmuhammeds8987]

Ur advice observe, don't absorb, helped me tremendously! !thank u so so much!

[@whiteass7118]

That movie would be a great burglary alarm. Having that yelling come over hidden speakers.with cameras recording the whole thing. I Would love to see the reactions from the burglars. Because watching that video sure gets under your skin. We will call it a Nassistic alarm system.

[@MrDuffy81]

This is creeping me out. I was woken up to this rage last night and it is ruining my marriage and my life. Thank you for the video so I can finally see what is wrong with my wife. I did nothing to provoke these attacks and I am blamed and I don’t even know what I’m being blamed for it it’s just anything and everything all at once. Thank you so much for making this video.

[@MrDuffy81]

It is extremely scary to be a man in this situation, knowing that your wife is willing to tell any lie at any time in order to be perceived as right by the police. Having somebody rage on you like this and then threaten to call the police at two in the morning is extremely scary. I find myself having to record my wife’s episodes which only makes things worse but if I don’t I will surely go to jail or be lied about or have an accusation made against me that I cannot defend myself against. I am constantly forced out of my home past midnight due to these rage episodes. I find myself sitting in the car at midnight documenting what just happened on my phone, trying to figure out how to stop this from happening again and again. It is so embarrassing to have to say that I am being abused by a woman.

[@ralph57100]

leave her.

[@DNTCreativeMedia]

The "car rage" was the favorite of a narcissist who loved unloading on me. That's a dangerous place to be because there's nowhere to go. Excellent video.

[@amiwhite5514]

My dad was like this. We left a children's record out of its protective sleeve.. he raged as my sister and I cowered

[@skyyflower36]

This is my mother almost to a T. I watched this when I was young living in the narc house and it was so unbearable. All of it, hair cutting and beatings. I have now blocked out a lot of my childhood and sometimes I even wonder if I was abused. I know I was and have PTSD bad. My parents have ruined me from being a good parent myself. My parents used to dump the trash in our beds if we forgot to take it out. The amount of stress going home from school was heavy. Just never knowing what horrible surprise you have waiting for you. There was always something wrong.

[@OkkyHan]

Just like my narc husband, stepped on my son's (his step son) face holding a machete to his neck, because during an "episode" of his low self-esteem he misheard when I said "If I wanted a divorce I would've filed it". What he heard : "I want a divorce and I've filed it".
Well now it's filed. Go mad.

[@blackcotton2288]

that movie scared the shit out of me as a kid...I had no idea what was wrong with her.. Makes sense.

[@davidjenkins5404]

This is how my parents treated me

[@MrLeonightis]

me too

[@mdee860]

So, so sorry David. I hope you are learning & healing. Remember, you didn't deserve that, ever. It was your parent's fault not yours. Stay around true, kind people only & heal. Hugs

[@mrsmossymouse2997]

My sister is bipolar...but I suspect she is also a narcissist, I have been the focus of her rage many, many times. Only rarely physically, normally it is an emotionally abusive response. I have been screamed at because I decided to choose a different religious viewpoint from her, I have witnessed her scream at her current partner because he hadn't put a bin liner in the bin 2 seconds after she asked him to do so. She had been smiling and laughing moments before. She is completely lacking in empathy, she hardly ever accepts that she could be wrong in any way even when provided with evidence...and even if She does accept that She was wrong, never ever have I heard her apologise...not even once! She belittles and mocks me constantly, goes from one mood to another in an instant. Often manipulates others around to her viewpoint. (though one person has actually told me that they only agree just to shut her up)
I really want to love my only sister....and I really do try, I give her every benefit of the doubt, put up with all her issues as much as I can. I understand that she doesn't really do it 'deliberately'...but recently she went off at me again. It was the last straw for me, I realised that as an adult I no longer have to put up with it. So I don't see her anymore. Oh I'd be friendly if I bumped into her, but otherwise I just don't want her drama in my life anymore.
Narcissism really sucks a big one....and a bipolar narcissist....? Atomic combination! 💣💥

[@elizabethasikpo2847]

Mrs Mossy Mouse OMG!!! You just described the exact relationship that I've had with my sister my entire childhood. When I became an adult and confident enough to not allow her to bully me anymore I decided to leave her alone to started my healing process from past traumatic mental, emotional, and physical abuse from her and my bipolar mother. It's been difficult not having a sister or mother but I have to do what's best for me and my mental health and physical wellness.

[@cherylmarshall6874]

I could have written your comments myself. Rage from my grandmother passed down to my mom, to my only sister. We have no really close relationship. I fear that she is bipolar as well as a raging narc. All of her rage is focused onto me. Her husband calmly "yesses" her. Her exhaustive almost orgasmic like rage is comfortably spewed onto me. I can no longer be a part of this. It's costing me my health.

[@mariajmc6557]

Have a sis like this. have done no contact for the past 20 years. She had the flying monkeys in the family just like her but truth prevails as Michelle says don't defend. 5 years ago she was totally exposed and it's heavenly bliss.

[@blissfulthoughts5849]

You just described my relationship with my sister

[@RMarshallB00KS]

Your videos are life-saving to me when I apply your instructions; specifically at work. Thanks a mil! :-)

[@cheyanne919]

This clip reminds me of my mom. She threw my stuff into the trash if my room wasn't spotless as a you child on up. She would also wake me up screaming. I was so scared.

[@PaulinaJohnsonMBA]

I grew up with a mother just like this! I have issues physically cleaning.. I pay a cleaning service.. I never treated my children like this.

[@magnessko]

Thanks for video. But the movie clip was almost unbearable.

[@christinec.7943]

I know Joan Crawford was a narcissist but the wire hanger scene has been misinterpreted since the movie came out. Joan had to give herself an abortion with a wire hanger and mutilated herself; because of THAT she wasn't able to have children. She had been impregnated by a Hollywood producer (she got 'Weinsteined), and received a lead role; the pregnancy was going to COST HER that role. She took matters into her own hands since abortion was illegal. Her REACTION to wire hangers and her attack on her ADOPTED daughter is a direct result of the pain suffered by the Gas-lighting Hollywood continues to do today.

[@otherworlder1]

@@christinec.7943 Hollywood is evil IMO. I never heard this story but it does not surprise me one bit. So incredibly tragic.

[@lausdeandl]

My husband rages (still) in the car, to the point where he would say when I addressed this: I am not driving, you drive then! And he would pull over and get out of the car. So I got behind the wheel (kids in the back seat) and drove off. He had to walk home twice ( 8 miles and 11 miles). That was several years ago, he has not done this kind of behavior since. Wonder why. :)

[@francinesmith8109]

Wonder why you're still with him....

[@georgerivera9035]

I was married to a woman like that. She can was explosively, viciously violent without provocation or cause. I'm embarrassed to even publish what she did to me, but she robbed my life and career. Then she accused me of the vilest, untrue things and was constantly threatening to expose me of things I never did. She even tried to murder me and two of my kids when they were babies. She's almost succeeded.

[@ws5706]

That movie clip was very hard to watch. Brings back so many memories of when I was young. Can't wait for the day that I skip on my folks' funerals. 41 and free now.

[@meimeisze3497]

So sad to watch.

[@vidyadharUppaluru]

Even worse to live through it for years

[@chantraotep]

Mommy Dearest reminds me a lot of my parents. They both acted with narcissistic rage and favored my little brother. My brother adopted this behavior and narcissistic behaviors as an adult.

[@seanbailey1156]

This made me cry....I used to get attacked in the middle of the night, the crying thing she did triggered me badly.. thats what my ex used to do. Her hitting that child made me imagine my daughter and I couldnt help from crying. This is EXACTLY what narcissistic rage looks like, I wonder if there is a reason many victims are attacked at night. My ex was an adderall addict, so she never really slept. leaving her to plot on how to attack me all night. It first would be the shock of the screaming.....then the physical abuse, the hysterical crying, except it would be followed by me running out of the house in the middle of the night, or curling up in the corner of a room to hide and hopefully sleep for a few hours.

[@jeansolano1762]

They attack at night because the lack of sleep can make you an easier victim. It’s a way to keep you weak and off kilter. I had an ex who was psychologically abusive and did this to me every night when I had to work the next day and he didn’t. Of course it never happened when he needed to be up and functioning the next day. Sick.

[@michealcarver2474]

You all see what the love of money, self esteem, pretty clothes, worship from others, will turn a man or woman into?

[@atcmadness4351]

This reminds me of a girl I dated; She would pick a fight with anyone, anywhere and anytime, you never knew.... Anyhow, TY, this is Spot ON

[@sidlopes4429]

Steve Thomas ,yes she is

[@atcmadness4351]

^ No, that's not true. I ASSUMED that, but she/they cannot form relationships, compassion, empathy. There is a big difference from a person you feel is crazy versus a narcissistic person. They find people to use as "tools" and I watched everyone guys do things for her and give her things she needed for free because she had the looks... You see, this girl was educated and a 9.5 out of 10, so I fell for her. The 2nd week of the relationship, she ruined her new jeans and then brought them back and screamed at the returns lady; I recall not being able to process this. She signed up for her gun permit and I thought "she will kill me and claim self defense someday"!! But, I liked her, I liked to help her but I was being used the whole time and now I can pick them out of a crowd just like the Author of this video. Now I RUN!! Edit - spelling

[@user-oh2xq4ij9j]

That's my childhood
This gave me goosebumps it scares me

[@kchild71]

Wow this is hard to watch but necessary for understanding the psychotic rage of a pathological narcissist. Thank you for your work.

[@malusa9508]

You really made me understand why I put up with the psychological abuse, cause some how we are repeating patterns.

[@racegirlpeasant6141]

i m traumatized by this. i still panic and get anxious when my mother speaks louder than normal or when she speaks alone but loud enough to let everyone in the house hear.

[@PotterSpurn1]

FSTT leans on the sheer expression of anger here. But I think that is misplaced. The essence of NR is the sheer unreasonableness of what is generating the anger and cruel behaviour, which can be ice cold rage - calm and cooly delivered but just as evil and painful. When my mother, a NPD, answered my question: 'why do you hate me so much' she said that it was because of her first born son. She didn't start flinging stuff about or scream and shout. It was the confusion it caused: I had no idea she had a first born son, which I assumed had died at birth. In fact, I don't think there had been one and even if there had been, how could I possibly be responsible. I was a young child. I had an older brother who was alive and kicking. Narcissists blame unreasonably - completely so. That is the essence of their rage not how it displays. You are blamed just for being someone to blame.

[@mdee860]

OMG - that just triggered a memory. First night my soon to be husband & I closed on our new house, we started to paint. He "told me" to not step in the paint tray. 🤯 OK, no problem. I was on a stepstool, painting away. He then stepped in the paint tray, flipped it, slammed into me which caused me to slam into the wall I was painting! Then the rage began. I had never witnessed anything like that. As he was swearing & yelling... I scrambled to clean it up. He just kept yelling & tried to blame me! And that's how a people pleaser (me) reacts & the scene was now set for years of Covert Narc. abuse. Uuugh. Wish I had known then what I know now. There would have been no marriage.

[@michellestaley7682]

My mom was a narcissist and I took the brunt of her rage. It was not until after she passed away and in counseling that a name was put on her mental illness. I grew up thinking I was a bad person and responsible for all the chaos in the world. Top that with alcoholism and it was a nightmare. I moved out of her home at age 15.

[@Ladushka68]

Exactly. In the car. He did that so many times. And I was so scared.

[@rawreiki]

Just after a quick memory search, we have left too many pairs of shoes in front of the ladder, my mom didn't have any food made (she had had 3 or 4 actually, some where leftovers, some she made because she didn't want to being accused of that, but guess, he didn't like any of them and that meant "she hadn't cooked anything"), one time because I could see the range was coming so he tried to find something to yell and at that point I announced I am to go for some cycling now. He knew I was doing it to skip the quarrel and he knew he would loose his best victim, right when he needed one, so he starting yelling "For cycling? Right after launch, are you crazy!!" out of his lungs. The decibels he would reach were out of a man's capacity to yell, no exaggeration. I remember me thinking of the neighbor and how embarrassed I was for them having to listen to this situation. Then I left anyway but I thought I would explode inside, I felt like I was going to have a stroke or something really really bad. I called my brother. I knew he was not only with their side, but he would present me to them in a bad way any opportunity possible, but I was so bad inside that I didn't know where to turn for support. I thought that as older, who had never taken any part on helping us, he would at least now like to take some responsibility. His first words (and the only I would hear before I hung up) were "What did you do to him again?". My mom I think was with me this one time. But I clearly remember her wanting ME to apologize to him, because he had a range attack. I had NO idea what to apologize for but I wouldn't either way. All her problem was that he would yell to her, so she wanting me to be her parent, protect her from him, any means. No matter that I could probably learn to bow in front of any future abuser (thank God I didn't learn that lesson), as long as she had him tamed. Sorry, as long as I did. Mom and bro would always accuse me for having an attitude, but sorry, I have no idea how to put a happy, obedience face, when being verbally and psychologically attacked every day for no reason. And now I know that that was his problem with me, I was the only one who would clearly show I'm not ok with that. I remember me thinking "Is this candid camera, wtf is he yelling now for?" It was ridiculous, but at the same time so so emergency feeling. It started very rarely in the early ages, mood swings for just one day or sth, but as years went by, his bad mood would be more and more present, for longer periods of times, like he would wake up like that, till it was constant. Well, apart from when he was out with friends and more important with people he respected of. I believe that was bipolar along with narcissism. Even when he laughed, I could see it was not a healthy & real happiness. I remember buying my first cell phone secretly from all of the family. I wanted to be able to talk to my best friend when in the middle of the night he'd suddenly let out his terrifying voice and I would stay petrified in my bed, not knowing what would happen to mom, but not having the nerve to reveal myself from my hideaway bedroom. Never ever laid a hand on us, still that was sounding like it was possible to happen. I'm standing here in my late 30's, knowing that only his bad health that makes him too tired to yell out of his lungs and me living away and hardly every see or phone them, makes things better. I'm left drained and tired though, still curing since my adrenals and thyroid gone down after years & years of high adrenaline and stress. He was diagnosed with depression years ago. Refused to have those pills. During a conversation with my mom, she denied that he was ever diagnosed with that. Last year in another conversation my dad bragged that "Are there many parents that can say they raised their kids as good as we did?". Yeah, let me think... Parenting done right, bravo!

[@Scorpio-mq9dk]

**Sad Fanfare**
Rip childhood.
Sorry for ya buddy :(

[@bingsby9085]

My mom throws a tantrum kinda like that over me having depression, cleaning but not cleaning enough for her satisfaction, me doing nothing when im the only sibling that does all the chores, when I don't talk to her because she's cold-shouldering me, when I accidentally leave a single drinking glass out on the counter, when I exist tbh. Everyday is a surprise- I never know what I'm doing wrong and you can 100% bet I'm the last to ever find out.

[@doricashu4984]

That video was hard to watch for me. I dont think my parents are narcissts but when I was a child they would sometimes beat the ish out of me, just like in the clip but with a belt , for things i did not do and not apologize for it after realizing that they were wrong. I think it has to do with 'culture'. Some african parents are violent and very proud. I don't know.. I'm in my recovery journey I'm trying to understand why I am the way that I am today but it's hard to classify my parents as narcissists even though they fucked up hard at times..

[@lisaspikes4291]

I remember the first time I saw this movie. It was very familiar. I didn’t realize that other mothers were not like that. My mother did this all the time. It was the norm.

[@MissMartiniCorsetry]

WHOA> mind blown. I watched that mommy dearest movie when I was a kid (primary school), and that exact scene with the hangers reminded me of my mum. I thought i was being overdramatic because my mother constantly told me i was spoiled.
Ah yes the narcissistic mother. I ended up being diagnosed with bipolar by 24 years old.
She made out like she was a god and i was a piece of shit. I was a criminal living in her house that she couldnt get rid of because i was her daughter so that made her the victim.
sorry for the rant!!! Im much better now at 41years though all this stuff being explained in such a rational way is amazing to me. When i was a teen it was an absolute rule that the parent was always the victim of bad behavour by the child/teen.

[@dnashj33]

Oh, man. This fits my abusive wife like a glove. The comment in the middle of the video that says "The Narcissist makes her victim clean up the mess she made" is EXACTLY what my wife does! She did this every time she made a big mess, including the last time she had a fit of rage. She broke a big piece of pottery over my arm, causing a huge bruise, and had the audacity to insist that I clean it up. It's sickening. That's why I left then (a month ago) and haven't returned to the house. If she doesn't humble herself and get professional help (and be honest and open with them, instead of being defensive and deceptive), we are done.

[@snowstormonsat]

The most traumatic of her rages...the one that completely annihilated any self esteem I had left, was when she cut my long beautiful blonde hair off at age 8. I tried everything to get away so my sick father held me down while she cut my hair in chunks with huge dull scissors...all of it. I screamed and begged for her to stop but she was out of her mind. That destroyed me. I looked so ugly after that. Kids made fun. Strangers mistook me for a boy. It's was so horrific. I had no self esteem. I got so quiet in school. So in secure. So withdrawn. It was so extremely damaging. Yet no one cared about me or ever stuck up for me. I felt invisible and so alone. As a child and still as an adult. I have such a complex with hair to this day. Every single time I see my mother she picks on my hair telling me how much she hates it....how I've ruined it and how ugly I look. I'm 46 now and I'm an attractive woman and I take care of my long hair. She has the ugliest hair imaginable so clearly she is projecting. But it still haunts me and until she dies, I have hear how much she hates my hair.

[@aleph-tavunutterable1585]

I was 12 and was knocking on the bathroom door so that my older sister would get out of the bathroom. My Dad was sleeping on the couch probably after a night of drugs and drinking. My Dad then came after me and threw me on the bed and punched me in the stomach several times and then punched me in the sides of my head repeatedly. By the time My sister and mom came in the room he was slapping me back and forth in the face. I was covered with bruises, lumps on my head and finger print marks. My nose bled for days. The day later he said sorry but didn't regret it. I asked him if it was because I yelled at my sister, What kid doesn't yell at their sibling at some point? Then he told me to get the fuck to my room before he went for another round.

[@camman6912]

Aleph-Tav Unutterable to bad I wasn’t around
I would have tried out my 9MM on him

[@paigedallas9781]

this is like a literal scene from my childhood

[@NarcSurvivor]

That clip is so similar to my experiences from my childhood. No child deserves that.

[@ninasarai4547]

my mom is just like Mother Dearest .. Growing up being raised by someone who has a episode of narcissistic rage multiple times throughout the day everday up until you're 15 has long term effects on you . The way you think , the way you speak to people , the way you treat people.. Some good some bad. Bad being self-esteem , self love , etc. All those things for me still aren't here but I'm trying my best with the most genuine help from my boyfriend and now your channel .. SUBSCRIBED