The Only Clothes a Dog Should Wear - Demetri Martin

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  • čas přidán 30. 05. 2021
  • Demetri Martin analyzes why dogs shouldn’t wear sweaters, the messed-up thing about tree houses and the inconveniences of public bathrooms.
    Original airdate: September 9, 2012
    About Demetri Martin. Stand-Up Comedian.
    Demetri Martin explains why surprise party goers don't need to tell the birthday boy how to feel, what type of cigarette help people quit and how to halt tap dancers.
    #StandUp #DemetriMartin
    Subscribe to Comedy Central Stand-Up: / @standup
    Watch more Comedy Central Stand-Up: / standup
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    Watch full Comedy Central stand-up specials: www.cc.com/topic/stand-up .
    Comedy Central Stand-Up: Anti-Bias Statement: www.cc.com/info/k32ti7/ccsu-a...
  • Komedie

Komentáře • 223

  • @r.laurenzo7602
    @r.laurenzo7602 Před 2 lety +200

    the fact that he's still rocking the Justin briber is fckn hilarious!

    • @CollinRapp33
      @CollinRapp33 Před 2 lety +16

      Well, this clip is from 2012 according to the description, so I’m not sure how accurate it is to say “still.” ;)

    • @catharineorellana3522
      @catharineorellana3522 Před 2 lety +27

      No. Bieber has always rocked the Demetri Martin hair cut. Demetri has been around a LOT longer!

    • @flelite3994
      @flelite3994 Před rokem

      *He copied Mitch Hedberg*

    • @flelite3994
      @flelite3994 Před rokem +1

      *He copied Mitch Hedberg*

    • @awesome346
      @awesome346 Před rokem +1

      Jesus loves you!

  • @ashishamohanty8275
    @ashishamohanty8275 Před 2 lety +378

    Never thought I would see ice bear doing stand up comedy

  • @robertonunes1231
    @robertonunes1231 Před 3 lety +249

    This guy is just a one liner machine

    • @flelite3994
      @flelite3994 Před rokem +3

      *He copied Mitch Hedberg*

    • @raymondm4441
      @raymondm4441 Před rokem +7

      who copied Steven Wright

    • @mmabuff101
      @mmabuff101 Před rokem

      @@flelite3994 shut up

    • @hihowrya370
      @hihowrya370 Před 9 měsíci

      Try Anthony Jeselnik.

    • @Ultraway13
      @Ultraway13 Před 8 měsíci +1

      Demetri, Steven & Mitch are all great. All of them have dinstinct voices and styles and I don't think anybody is a copycat. But putting Antony Jeselnak in the same spot with these 3 great dudes is just... No.

  • @clarkeyzmachine
    @clarkeyzmachine Před 3 lety +87

    The Immortal being known as Demetri Martin.

  • @nealfager8126
    @nealfager8126 Před 23 dny +1

    One of the best and most underrated observational comedians ever!!! He could probably look at anything and make a hilarious joke out of it! 😂😂😂

  • @torietorreano5214
    @torietorreano5214 Před 3 lety +50

    I forgot how much I love Demetri!

  • @gsrorive
    @gsrorive Před 3 lety +58

    Had no expectations when I clicked, but I loved it!

  • @vomitkermit3446
    @vomitkermit3446 Před 2 lety +38

    For people comparing him to Mitch, they toured at the same time. Demetri has been around since 97, dont let that baby face fool you, dude is pushing 50

    • @louiearmstrong
      @louiearmstrong Před 2 lety +3

      this set is almost ten years old

    • @ayelemensah8816
      @ayelemensah8816 Před 2 lety +2

      @@louiearmstrong Still, that puts him at around 40 even though he looked like a round-faced 27-year-old!

    • @saph100
      @saph100 Před 4 měsíci

      Its kind of like Dante Basco whos the same age as him and still looks and sounds 16. Oh and Zuko voice Dante not the other way around xD.

  • @teddratch_owner_signature_4920
    @teddratch_owner_signature_4920 Před 2 měsíci +3

    Steven Wright, Demitri Martin & Mitch Headberg were/are the kings of surreal comic one-liners

  • @jonathanperry8331
    @jonathanperry8331 Před 3 lety +79

    That's actually a good idea I might just make dog jeans

  • @pewdiepieyepthomi5174
    @pewdiepieyepthomi5174 Před 8 měsíci +14

    “If you see someone smelling their hand, there’s never a good story behind that.” Hit home

  • @DBee-ee7tz
    @DBee-ee7tz Před 3 lety +138

    Sounds like a typical homeroom conversation in any given middle school😁

    • @flelite3994
      @flelite3994 Před rokem +6

      *He copied Mitch Hedberg*

    • @severiusbrandusa1413
      @severiusbrandusa1413 Před 2 měsíci

      ​@@flelite3994 Exactly. Middle schoolers are not coming up with this crap. In fact, High Schoolers are dumb too.

  • @nggyunglyd2374
    @nggyunglyd2374 Před 9 měsíci +2

    “Ice bear will make them laugh”

  • @0._-kirby_the_gamer-_.0
    @0._-kirby_the_gamer-_.0 Před rokem +41

    I never thought I'd see the day that ice bear would be a comedian

    • @CNWhatImSaiyan
      @CNWhatImSaiyan Před rokem

      And don’t even GET ME started on what Pan-Pan can do 🤣🐼🥃czcams.com/video/VHr2JqoOqYk/video.html

  • @nathantaylor247
    @nathantaylor247 Před 3 lety +98

    I've missed his comedy.

  • @kevinkevinholt
    @kevinkevinholt Před 3 lety +34

    I doubt he spelled it "dog's" when writing his routine

  • @chrisjimenez2192
    @chrisjimenez2192 Před 2 lety +7

    *_I'm balding, my bangs are disappearing but I really wanna have this man's exact hair style_*

  • @ajstudios9210
    @ajstudios9210 Před 2 lety +14

    This is the voice of Ice Bear and Isaac, y'all😁

  • @colechristian3765
    @colechristian3765 Před 2 lety +20

    Ice Bear is the freaking best

  • @sweetphi06
    @sweetphi06 Před rokem +10

    “i saw a dog wearing a sweater..”
    “ICE saw a dog wearing a sweater….”
    “ICE BEAR SAW A DOG WEARING A SWEATER”

  • @leahmurphy6869
    @leahmurphy6869 Před 3 lety +139

    Haha, some of these had Mitch Hedberg vibes

    • @joshgreen7514
      @joshgreen7514 Před 3 lety +2

      Mitch Hedberg is worse than this garbage

    • @mobius3466
      @mobius3466 Před 3 lety +25

      @@joshgreen7514 you have zero humor bro.

    • @ellebelle6439
      @ellebelle6439 Před 2 lety +8

      @@joshgreen7514 Mitch hedberg was hilarious so is demitri.

    • @ellebelle6439
      @ellebelle6439 Před 2 lety +8

      Ikr he and demitri have been my go to for pick me ups when I'm feeling like I could use a good laugh lol

    • @jbfreely3660
      @jbfreely3660 Před 2 lety +1

      Had the same feeling

  • @Uufda651
    @Uufda651 Před 3 lety +10

    Liked the automatic bathroom bit

  • @elvispelvis_0077
    @elvispelvis_0077 Před 3 lety +10

    Always will Demetri be one of my favs🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼

  • @blueplum143
    @blueplum143 Před 2 lety +17

    I love Demtri Martin! hilarious mind

    • @flelite3994
      @flelite3994 Před rokem

      *He copied Mitch Hedberg*

    • @Justsomenerd69
      @Justsomenerd69 Před rokem

      @@flelite3994 Who cares? Everyone has inspiration

    • @flelite3994
      @flelite3994 Před rokem

      @@Justsomenerd69 a lot of people care it's nearly joke theft

    • @Justsomenerd69
      @Justsomenerd69 Před rokem

      @@flelite3994 It really isn't. If someone makes rock music is that stealing someone else's music or do you have to invent your own genre to make music?

    • @Justsomenerd69
      @Justsomenerd69 Před rokem

      Similar style does not mean you stole their content

  • @KVWilson21
    @KVWilson21 Před 3 lety +23

    This guy is a genius 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @danishiman4206
    @danishiman4206 Před 2 lety

    Made my day

  • @lukescott5261
    @lukescott5261 Před 3 lety +14

    Why does he look like a grown up version of one of the boyfriends from Scott Pilgrim? 😂

  • @GaydolfShitler
    @GaydolfShitler Před 2 měsíci +1

    Randomly thought of this man yesterday and I forgot how funny he was

  • @almightyzulu8174
    @almightyzulu8174 Před 2 lety +6

    This dude is great

  • @hamstergal643
    @hamstergal643 Před rokem +9

    How did I never come across him before? Brilliant comedy!

  • @gastonforde2121
    @gastonforde2121 Před 2 měsíci +1

    I love you Ice Bear. You're great.

  • @Jimmithi
    @Jimmithi Před rokem

    So excited to see at the Taft in Cincy next year!

  • @nealmac187
    @nealmac187 Před 29 dny +1

    😂 ❤ I would love to find his routine about the guy inventing cheese, by letting milk spoil.

  • @justadrawing
    @justadrawing Před rokem +6

    I'm just confused how he doesn't sound like Ice Bear and talks normally

  • @tylerthompson1842
    @tylerthompson1842 Před 2 lety +7

    He’s this generations Steven Write

  • @user-pn8cv5ru3v
    @user-pn8cv5ru3v Před měsícem

    It takes a lot to make me laugh and I have a great sense of humor

    • @mickritchie1815
      @mickritchie1815 Před měsícem

      You have a great sense of humour but it takes a lot to make you laugh? Sounds like you have a stubborn sense of humour 😂

    • @watermyplants6089
      @watermyplants6089 Před 7 dny

      so the only time you laugh is when its some mainstream comedian making jokes for 12 year olds?

  • @wannadanc3894
    @wannadanc3894 Před 2 lety +36

    I own his book, he is a comedic genius!

  • @Mirici1
    @Mirici1 Před 6 měsíci

    My favorite

  • @richissac8916
    @richissac8916 Před 2 lety +8

    Waiting for Demetri’s new special always

    • @LucasRTheCure
      @LucasRTheCure Před 2 měsíci

      Coming to Netflix in April. I’m psyched

  • @DWish808
    @DWish808 Před 3 lety +8

    Mammals whether walking upright or on all fours all have arms in front and legs in the back. The front "legs" don't have backward bending knees, they're elbows. Prove me wrong.

  • @JavierFernandez01
    @JavierFernandez01 Před 3 lety +16

    Hahahahha. Good to see Dimitri back on the saddle.

    • @inwardpod
      @inwardpod Před 3 lety +2

      It is from 2012 but he still tours!

    • @JavierFernandez01
      @JavierFernandez01 Před 3 lety +3

      @@inwardpod he should do a special again.

    • @NAConen
      @NAConen Před 2 lety

      I would watch him over Chapelle any day

  • @andrespereydaresearch
    @andrespereydaresearch Před 3 lety +2

    Dude's awesome

  • @deluge71
    @deluge71 Před 11 měsíci

    Brilliant

  • @g9blin603
    @g9blin603 Před rokem +1

    Ok that letter joke got me

  • @5winder
    @5winder Před 2 lety +6

    Dimitri makes cursing sound alright.

  • @shorditchiscool
    @shorditchiscool Před 3 lety +17

    Love how you see the world, you’re hilarious 😂 x

  • @AntGilroy
    @AntGilroy Před 3 lety +3

    RIP Mitch Hedberg

  • @Ninthxotic
    @Ninthxotic Před 7 měsíci +1

    I need to put skinny jeans on my Rottweiler lolol #DemetriMartin

  • @TinToeTimmyTime
    @TinToeTimmyTime Před 2 lety

    🎶🎶 I asked, cause I'm not sure, does anybody tell real jokes anymore? Bow in the presence of greatness!🎶🎶

  • @chayam5904
    @chayam5904 Před 2 lety

    this is so so cute

  • @peivandryks5217
    @peivandryks5217 Před 5 měsíci

    Demetri, Ismo and Jim Gaffigan are on a whole different level 😂

  • @tonybarde2572
    @tonybarde2572 Před 2 lety +3

    Ice Bear loves comedy

  • @jdorffer
    @jdorffer Před 10 dny

    2024 special on Netflix, its him

  • @tryin2beehappygolucky431

    I have the movie 'Taking Woodstock'! Great crazy movie! I did not know that he did stand-up! 😳

  • @LycanLink
    @LycanLink Před 3 lety +13

    "I have a great idea! Let's write in the thumbnail, 'Dog Is Don't Have Arms!"
    Nice apostrophe work, Comedy Central. 🙄

  • @migarcanjomor
    @migarcanjomor Před 2 lety

    Dimitri goated fr

  • @SN57ONE
    @SN57ONE Před rokem

    1:15 😂

  • @xjball88x
    @xjball88x Před 2 lety +1

    I’m getting some serious Mitch Hedberg vibes here

  • @Bluenews5
    @Bluenews5 Před rokem

    😂 ok the American joke got me.🤣👍👍

  • @volcanicsour
    @volcanicsour Před 2 lety

    Hilarious

  • @filmfelineadmin
    @filmfelineadmin Před 2 lety +4

    Young George Carlin lol I love it when intelligent guys do comedy. This guy is probably a total nerd. Awesome. Right now I'm totally into Jimmy Car, but nice to see new stuff

    • @bilbo_gamers6417
      @bilbo_gamers6417 Před 2 lety

      jimmy car is a very new way to say george carlin

    • @micahwright5901
      @micahwright5901 Před 2 lety +1

      This isn’t even close to George Carlin. Demetri isn’t ranting about his rudimentary societal worldviews.
      Demetri is better.

  • @dancrooker8309
    @dancrooker8309 Před 2 lety

    new podcast SPORTS KARDS NATION very funny i laughed my ass off

  • @beautifulcrazey7713
    @beautifulcrazey7713 Před 3 lety

    His jean sizing 😅

  • @limelantern5637
    @limelantern5637 Před 3 lety +5

    I want to start a band with the bass playing Rottweiler. He can wear his two pairs of skinny jeans, and I'll wear a sweater as pants like the mom in Beetlejuice.

  • @hi-wy7ph
    @hi-wy7ph Před 2 lety +3

    Ice bear

  • @rodrigomarquez3430
    @rodrigomarquez3430 Před 2 lety +1

    Ice Bear!!!!!!

  • @FayaAntsOfficial
    @FayaAntsOfficial Před 3 lety +20

    Ex girlfriend’s personality 😄😄

  • @OMeffigy
    @OMeffigy Před 2 lety +2

    Actually dogs have two arms and two legs. Elbows and knees are the key

  • @danderson8431
    @danderson8431 Před 2 lety

    I live in Bear County, but it’s spelled Bexar County. Now I know what’s up with that “x”.

  • @FollowerOfChrist328
    @FollowerOfChrist328 Před 2 měsíci +1

    ice bear is ice bear

  • @amircammok2268
    @amircammok2268 Před rokem +1

    Demitri looks like Ray Romano. This is good though.

  • @heyimjustaguy3743
    @heyimjustaguy3743 Před 9 měsíci

    “American”😂

  • @twodogsandapicnictable
    @twodogsandapicnictable Před 3 lety +1

    Technically, based on their shoulder joints and wrist bones, dogs DO have arms. They just walk on them.

  • @1.4142
    @1.4142 Před rokem +1

    Texan sized is bigger

  • @merosilla
    @merosilla Před 2 lety +1

    Can’t believe he voiced ice bear

  • @ducati.hottie
    @ducati.hottie Před 2 lety +1

    This guy reminds me of Mitch Hedberg.

  • @matthewblunderbuss4545
    @matthewblunderbuss4545 Před 2 lety +3

    Steven Wright but less stoned.

  • @eastcoastmusicmachine7989

    So the proofreader was on vacation when you made the still for this clip? “Dog’s” don’t have arms?

  • @jonathanstatham88
    @jonathanstatham88 Před 3 lety

    That's the first comment? Cmon. I'm going to go ahead and give this kid a chance. I will re-edit as we go. I watch comics professionally. Let me give review here.

  • @theyregreat
    @theyregreat Před rokem +1

    I CAME HERE FOR ICE BEAR

  • @moustachio334
    @moustachio334 Před rokem

    Put a piece of toilet paper over the toilet sensor and you won’t have that problem;)

  • @quincyrodgers48
    @quincyrodgers48 Před 2 lety

    Ice Bear 😊

  • @TheLaziiness
    @TheLaziiness Před 2 lety +1

    Demitri Martin, aka the lil Wayne of comedy. This nigga the goat

  • @jamesallen74
    @jamesallen74 Před 2 lety +1

    This guy is 48, looks like 24, HOW!!??!! no hair loss. lucky bastard.

  • @jdorffer
    @jdorffer Před 10 dny

    My clothes are easy sized

  • @heyhay5149
    @heyhay5149 Před 2 lety

    He looks like the Karate Kid Ralph Macchio wearing a Justin Beiber wig.

  • @tlaxietlkyon
    @tlaxietlkyon Před 2 lety +3

    Actually, it's infrared sensors not lasers.
    Also, this video is from 2012. Martin is not an ageless being.

  • @deserted_island
    @deserted_island Před 2 lety +1

    😁😆😂🤣

  • @kozumekenma9157
    @kozumekenma9157 Před 2 lety +1

    I CANT BELIEVE HES ICE BEARS VA

    • @ML-jk3sz
      @ML-jk3sz Před rokem

      WHY NOT???? YOU'VE NEVER KNOWN ANY COMEDIANS TO VOICE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS BEFORE?

    • @kozumekenma9157
      @kozumekenma9157 Před rokem

      @@ML-jk3sz NO??? AKBDNANS

  • @wvu05
    @wvu05 Před 5 měsíci

    And of course, the automatic toilets never actually flush when you get up.

  • @MrDVNNY
    @MrDVNNY Před 2 lety +3

    I’ve always been a big fan Demetri Martin’s comedy but for some reason he really seems to be in a Mitch Hedberg impersonation during this clip. Maybe I gotta see the whole special first

  • @alexanderkamado504
    @alexanderkamado504 Před 2 lety

    This guy voiced Ice bear btw

  • @stevenwatts586
    @stevenwatts586 Před 2 lety

    I guess I need to “slow down”

  • @ChristopherPausz
    @ChristopherPausz Před 2 lety +1

    I predicted one of his stall jokes but it should’ve been “I ran out of toilet paper. Could you get me a roll?

    • @hankakah4180
      @hankakah4180 Před 2 lety

      I was wondering if he would have done a guy in the room, close to orgasm, "uh, uh, uh, sigh, man! I was so close! Now I have to start all over again!"

  • @FREVQUEBEATS
    @FREVQUEBEATS Před rokem +1

    HUGE mitch hedberg vibes 😂

  • @aworkinprogress88
    @aworkinprogress88 Před rokem +1

    0:27 Childhood Ruined.

    • @CNWhatImSaiyan
      @CNWhatImSaiyan Před rokem

      🐼: “Hold my life ‘n soul in rectangular form lmao”: czcams.com/video/KuogF8kr2yg/video.html

  • @severiusbrandusa1413
    @severiusbrandusa1413 Před 2 měsíci

    Demetri Martin was inhabited by the ghost of Mitch Hedberg.

  • @dahan419
    @dahan419 Před 8 měsíci

    Very Mitch Hedberg

  • @nfldefense
    @nfldefense Před rokem +1

    Channeling Mitch Hedberg