An innocent vocabulary joke

Sdílet
Vložit

Komentáře • 14K

  • @largestbrain
    @largestbrain Před 2 lety +366672

    Like “bro I’m attracted to OLDER minors, not the young ones”

  • @phoenix7289
    @phoenix7289 Před 6 měsíci +9297

    That delivery was IMMACULATE

    • @mattwarner4734
      @mattwarner4734 Před 2 měsíci +38

      I like the different emphasis on "technically speaking"

    • @Nater389
      @Nater389 Před 2 měsíci +12

      Man it HAD to be...or it would have been a disaster...LOL!Great joke and well told.

    • @erikkarling2176
      @erikkarling2176 Před měsícem

      Agreed.

    • @migueldelacruz8726
      @migueldelacruz8726 Před měsícem

      6/10 overall, it was funny but its not THAT funny. Needed more set up and less dead space in his delivery. A good 10/10 joke has you laughing hard during the set up and even harder at the punch line. Like that black dude named josh, forgot his last name but his elmo bit and komander jokes were hysterical.

    • @Nater389
      @Nater389 Před měsícem +1

      @@migueldelacruz8726 Naw man...a joke about a subject like this...NEEDS those "dead spaces" to ensure distinction and clarity.

  • @cesarf.g.9996
    @cesarf.g.9996 Před 2 lety +78544

    "Technically speaking 🤌, TECHNICALLY SPEAKING 🤌🤌"

  • @AverageYTshortsEnjoyer
    @AverageYTshortsEnjoyer Před 6 měsíci +9222

    I think the way you delivered the joke makes it 10x times better 😂

  • @No0neat
    @No0neat Před rokem +25726

    I love how he goes "just hear me out" with a bit of a shakey voice almost as if someone was about to pull a second amendment on his face.

    • @dfed324
      @dfed324 Před rokem +589

      "Pull a second amendment on his face"
      Lmao 💀💥🔫

    • @theragemachineau3855
      @theragemachineau3855 Před rokem +94

      Murica 😂

    • @NoIDontActuallyLiveInSeattle
      @NoIDontActuallyLiveInSeattle Před rokem

      @@dfed324 won’t lie…pedophiles are the one thing everyone gonna agree on to attack on sight. Lmaoooooo…like everyone has a kid or knows a kid or was a kid and the THOUGHT of someone hurting a child brings everyone together in righteous fury

    • @ju87stukadivebomber87
      @ju87stukadivebomber87 Před rokem +53

      @@theragemachineau3855 * hears "the halls of Montezuma * just outside, wall crashes down as the music begins to blare and an m1 Abrams turns its gun to the comedian. Too much?... ohh should I call off the A10 Close air support?

    • @michaelwagoner1524
      @michaelwagoner1524 Před rokem +56

      @@theragemachineau3855 btw there's a translation on your comment that says merica translates to kill it lol

  • @pebbleman54
    @pebbleman54 Před 2 lety +43355

    All the best stories start with the "give me one second, just hear me out"

    • @codyaaron3371
      @codyaaron3371 Před 2 lety +287

      Because then you actually listen

    • @icu3869
      @icu3869 Před 2 lety +77

      Many of the worst start that way- they already know you don’t even want to hear the b.s. That much “Explaining”=🚩🚩🚩🙉

    • @Nick-kq8pg
      @Nick-kq8pg Před rokem +18

      He could’ve explained it quicker, would’ve made it funnier

    • @AnnihilationXable
      @AnnihilationXable Před rokem +148

      "To write a great joke, you have to risk being offensive" i forgot who said that

    • @hmmmmmm8256
      @hmmmmmm8256 Před rokem +40

      @@icu3869 hey nobody asked 😁

  • @liddad
    @liddad Před 5 měsíci +1860

    It's an observation anyone who's chronically online has seen before, but the delivery with fear and panic leading up to the punchline is so funny and makes it really fun to watch.

    • @MiloMurphysLaw
      @MiloMurphysLaw Před 2 měsíci

      So all chronically online people are pedophiles then?
      Sorry, I meant ephebophiles

    • @ISavant
      @ISavant Před 2 měsíci

      or just anybody who has ever interacted with libertarians. sorry, "ephebophiles".

    • @Kronos74
      @Kronos74 Před měsícem +11

      Literally never have seen this anywhere else.

    • @DrunkSamurai
      @DrunkSamurai Před měsícem +15

      @@Kronos74 Read anime/manga forums.

    • @hchwhat
      @hchwhat Před měsícem +6

      I think we found one

  • @ET-rq2fg
    @ET-rq2fg Před 6 měsíci +705

    The discord moderator argument

  • @cucumbermelon5553
    @cucumbermelon5553 Před rokem +75003

    “Nah dude I’m into them tier 3 minors”

    • @Mane_wdf_goin_on_ohio_dawg
      @Mane_wdf_goin_on_ohio_dawg Před rokem +2699

      ⚰️

    • @goncalocarneiro3043
      @goncalocarneiro3043 Před rokem +1912

      That sounds like a line in a mobile phone app advertisement.

    • @flaminggaming143
      @flaminggaming143 Před rokem +844

      Teir 3? So whens the Legendary Minors come into play cause ive only got 2 Teir 2's and a Ultra Rare on my team

    • @lavish_ale5470
      @lavish_ale5470 Před rokem +357

      @@ducksongfans i ain’t gonna act like you didn’t say that

    • @xpez9694
      @xpez9694 Před rokem +85

      what are 18th birthday -12 :01 am called?

  • @annapskovskaya3529
    @annapskovskaya3529 Před rokem +31583

    “Let me tell you something, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING”

  • @zhawkruns4ever316
    @zhawkruns4ever316 Před 6 měsíci +431

    It takes a very special person with a very perfect delivery to pull off a joke like this.

    • @Collie4Nyah
      @Collie4Nyah Před 4 dny

      Sorry to mess up your 420 likes 😢

  • @phillippage8127
    @phillippage8127 Před 5 měsíci +309

    😂😂😂😂😂 so true. I've known of these differences for a while because I read a lot and I'm always afraid to try to explain it. 😂

    • @tibormalinsky8751
      @tibormalinsky8751 Před 4 měsíci +24

      I'm not. Yes, I end up being targeted as a pervert for saying "13yo and 17yo is not pedophilia". I'm sacrificing my patience and hope in mankind, but I can't stand when people say incorrect stuff.

    • @Rella-rellai
      @Rella-rellai Před 4 měsíci +27

      ​@@tibormalinsky8751I hope you add the whole that it is still wrong at the end because otherwise of course people would think you're trying to justify it lol

    • @tibormalinsky8751
      @tibormalinsky8751 Před 4 měsíci +4

      @@Rella-rellai it doesnt make any sense. Me, explaining what pedophilia is, is on the same level like being grammar nazi.
      I'm correcting people, not justifying

    • @terrancewood9322
      @terrancewood9322 Před 3 měsíci

      16+ is okay@@Rella-rellai

    • @madiz4228
      @madiz4228 Před 3 měsíci

      @@terrancewood9322no :(

  • @DodgeThatAttack
    @DodgeThatAttack Před 2 lety +93597

    "Your honour, that claim is false, im actually an ephebophile"

    • @dana102083
      @dana102083 Před 2 lety +725

      Slander!!

    • @jamiesmccormick
      @jamiesmccormick Před 2 lety +187

      Jerry Seinfeld is

    • @skysight1553
      @skysight1553 Před 2 lety +681

      Ephebophile is legal in some countries like I am from Pakistan here the legal age is 16 for girls and 18 for boys

    • @driftingwolf0
      @driftingwolf0 Před 2 lety +361

      @@skysight1553 legal age in some states is 16

    • @claraclenky9843
      @claraclenky9843 Před 2 lety

      @@skysight1553 TF
      EW y’all got pedos running your state allowing you to do it to ONLY young girls

  • @kenziecapps
    @kenziecapps Před 2 lety +20496

    “technically speaking🤌🏻…..technically 🤌🏻speaking🫵🏻”

    • @jecitivaz3097
      @jecitivaz3097 Před rokem +311

      Don’t point at me in that tone of voice 😒

    • @Area-eu4kg
      @Area-eu4kg Před rokem +144

      @@jecitivaz3097 the Italian in him was showing💀😂

    • @Meetyouthere777
      @Meetyouthere777 Před rokem +31

      Well then technically a predator-esque type movie in the romantic ephebophile genre won an oscar in the past couple of years. Something something *by your name*

    • @mtdubdachamp6917
      @mtdubdachamp6917 Před rokem +3

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @charlesbarnes1996
      @charlesbarnes1996 Před rokem +3

      😂😂😂😂

  • @confusedindividual
    @confusedindividual Před 3 měsíci +130

    Honestly, this might be the best setting to explain the difference

  • @AdMizzle
    @AdMizzle Před 6 měsíci +86

    Such a great performance. and the way he lingers right before the punchline and allows the crowd to gradually see where he's going. shit is perfection!

  • @astrovation3281
    @astrovation3281 Před rokem +21353

    "Nah I aint a pèdophile, thats too young, im only a hephebofile"

    • @georgecabrera9039
      @georgecabrera9039 Před rokem +851

      Officer this one right here👆

    • @celynne809
      @celynne809 Před rokem +67

      @@georgecabrera9039 😂

    • @alexahouse5493
      @alexahouse5493 Před rokem +183

      In a criminal justice system sexually based offense are…

    • @twenty-three7194
      @twenty-three7194 Před rokem +183

      Hepho what? hippopotamus? that's understandable, man. They're kinda hot

    • @kyialo
      @kyialo Před rokem +17

      @@twenty-three7194 Bro you’re 23 and saying this what the hell Lmaooo

  • @Opr8rKaz
    @Opr8rKaz Před 2 lety +31205

    He’s got a point and he proves another point while explaining his point.

    • @jcev6145
      @jcev6145 Před 2 lety +740

      Wait you got a point

    • @changbin1930
      @changbin1930 Před 2 lety +209

      Point

    • @karmamason8819
      @karmamason8819 Před 2 lety +284

      That a point I never thought of, thanks for pointing it out

    • @ant2290
      @ant2290 Před 2 lety +46

      there’s no point, it’s a joke lol

    • @Cyborg_Lenin
      @Cyborg_Lenin Před 2 lety +167

      @@ant2290 its a point joke.

  • @heyheyhey40
    @heyheyhey40 Před měsícem +13

    The joke was so perfect. And we were all sweating a bit along with him in the discomfort of it all. Thank Hod for the comic relief. 😂

  • @oxymoronchick7
    @oxymoronchick7 Před 5 měsíci +30

    Literally my favorite joke on the Internet right now

  • @GippyHappy
    @GippyHappy Před rokem +20583

    I love that he keeps being like no please don’t freak out yet

  • @yaetorlinck
    @yaetorlinck Před rokem +26737

    I love how deranged his body language is.

  • @CN86443
    @CN86443 Před 6 měsíci +57

    Leo DiCaprio: “this nigga spitting”

    • @smoothdahustla9729
      @smoothdahustla9729 Před měsícem +4

      Leo doesn't mess with minors. Just the 21-23 year olds.

    • @CN86443
      @CN86443 Před měsícem

      @@smoothdahustla9729 oh sorry
      Paul Walker: “this nigga spitting”

    • @kowhenry4188
      @kowhenry4188 Před měsícem

      So he is cebophile ​@@smoothdahustla9729

  • @VampireRefInAMajorKey
    @VampireRefInAMajorKey Před 5 měsíci +21

    My English vocabulary just got bigger. Thank you.

    • @1272JfC
      @1272JfC Před měsícem

      THAT PART 💯

  • @StEpHeNno22
    @StEpHeNno22 Před rokem +14589

    I love how much crowd control he had to do just to finish his joke without someone throwing something at him or heckling him. 😆

    • @thepiguy4958
      @thepiguy4958 Před rokem +139

      He didn't that's part of the joke.

    • @snigerjens3586
      @snigerjens3586 Před rokem +95

      @@thepiguy4958 it's funnier if we pretend he had to.

    • @Ebunoluwa13
      @Ebunoluwa13 Před rokem +75

      More like the crowd has self control enough to listen to his explanation first lol. R Kelly is a very touchy subject and normally he would've been shut down in 0.01 seconds

    • @LafemmebearMusic
      @LafemmebearMusic Před rokem +20

      @@Ebunoluwa13 and if they shut him down that would be valid too… that nasty man r kelly just so disappointing.

    • @chrollo7102
      @chrollo7102 Před rokem +14

      @@LafemmebearMusic what are you gonna do slap him Will Smith?

  • @tempestthegoat
    @tempestthegoat Před 2 lety +53693

    Like imagine ur friend just says
    “Actualyyyy he’s not a pedophile he’s a hebophile”

    • @eileensnow6153
      @eileensnow6153 Před 2 lety +5003

      “That’s them, officer.”

    • @thecoralcat2247
      @thecoralcat2247 Před 2 lety +904

      But the wood chipper doesn’t care

    • @gamershadow8
      @gamershadow8 Před 2 lety +367

      @@thecoralcat2247 big bubba in cell block D dgaf lol

    • @courier6ix9ine95
      @courier6ix9ine95 Před 2 lety

      Sounds like someone with a Jew fetish

    • @Try95th
      @Try95th Před 2 lety +139

      @@eileensnow6153 and then back at the station, "Dammit Smith, you nearly blew your cover again!"

  • @Trokonzah
    @Trokonzah Před měsícem +4

    This is literally one of my all time favorite bits. From set-up to punch it was phenomenal. I never skip when the short pops up. 👏🏾

  • @gabrielnobrev
    @gabrielnobrev Před rokem +26167

    "You like 11 year old girls. I like 10 year old girls. We are not the same."

  • @HafidzMurshidie
    @HafidzMurshidie Před rokem +21010

    This is definitely some shit Saul Goodman would use in an argument in court cases..

    • @CabronPR
      @CabronPR Před rokem +876

      "Your honor, my client is only into girls between the ages of 15-17, so therefore my client isn't a pedophile"

    • @HafidzMurshidie
      @HafidzMurshidie Před rokem +607

      @@CabronPR Judge : “And that is an underage sexual engagement, and it is clear in the transcript in which the defendant did engage in those activit~”
      Saul : “No, no, your honor. The prosecutor filed a charge against my client on pedophilia. Pedophilia, mind you, your honor. In New Mexico law book, section something-something, it is clear that pedophilia refers to an individual who is attracted to someone that is pre-pubescent. In which the prosecutor isn’t. Making my client is not a pedophile. Thus the charges won’t stick.”

    • @yourcommentisntfunnyv2709
      @yourcommentisntfunnyv2709 Před rokem +47

      @@CabronPR that’s true though

    • @PilloTheStar
      @PilloTheStar Před rokem +36

      Nah, liar liar jim carrey would definitely

    • @ehxjsjd4553
      @ehxjsjd4553 Před rokem +13

      @@PilloTheStar I have not thought about that movie for years until now. Thank you🥲

  • @uvan9899
    @uvan9899 Před 5 měsíci +10

    He is like 'hear me out I can explain"' 😂😂😂😂

  • @sarahscheurer2618
    @sarahscheurer2618 Před 3 měsíci +8

    This is the Joke that got me hooked Gianmarco. 😂😂😂

  • @HyphyStryke
    @HyphyStryke Před rokem +11925

    And now he’s technically a “convicted sex trafficker”

    • @mizibelle
      @mizibelle Před rokem +28

      Wait what?

    • @Philfan107
      @Philfan107 Před rokem +127

      @@mizibelle R. Kelly

    • @cathedral1375
      @cathedral1375 Před rokem

      @@mizibelle he had a sex dungeon, guy is finished don’t worry about it.

    • @prodfife
      @prodfife Před rokem +289

      @@Philfan107 i thought he was referring to gianmarco at first LMAO

    • @azariazulu
      @azariazulu Před rokem +19

      Why did you put that in quotes though.

  • @EddieMachetti
    @EddieMachetti Před 2 lety +8076

    “I promise this goes well” was my favorite part lmao

    • @notrustfunderz
      @notrustfunderz Před rokem +8

      *"I promise this is going somewhere"*

    • @gulabani2216
      @gulabani2216 Před rokem +1

      What she sai-

    • @sparky.-_
      @sparky.-_ Před rokem

      My fav part of the vid was czcams.com/video/jcXK-sPqsL0/video.html tbh

  • @WordAte
    @WordAte Před měsícem +1

    Brave joke. Fantastic delivery.

  • @Jezzar
    @Jezzar Před 2 měsíci +22

    I think this is my favourite clip of yours. The setup has Norm Macdonald energy. Great Delivery

  • @Turmer1c_
    @Turmer1c_ Před 2 lety +11679

    “Come on bro, I ain’t no pedophile bro.”
    (In his mind, he whispered…)
    “I’m hebophile bro.”

  • @DellaDykeborn
    @DellaDykeborn Před rokem +37050

    I'm autistic and had been telling people these distinctions for years. You just explained to me why people are uncomfortable with it.

    • @kittyem63
      @kittyem63 Před rokem +535

      fr

    • @plebulus
      @plebulus Před rokem +856

      What does autism have to do with this?
      edit: you guys can stop replying I GET IT NOW!!! I HAVE AUTISM TOO!!!!

    • @Julieehdz1
      @Julieehdz1 Před rokem +1139

      @@plebulusi think it’s because they are usually persistent, and sometimes they tend to “talk before think” whereas a person without that disorder usually thinks what they want to say

    • @HeosphorosSword
      @HeosphorosSword Před rokem +2

      ​@@Julieehdz1 No, you're thinking of ADHD, which is characterized by impulsivity. Autism is (primarily) a communication/social skills disorder, so someone who has autism may not be able to understand the social cues or intricacies of communication to understand why it's not great to explain the distinction. Autism is a communication impairment, but it also sometimes comes with other symptoms like sensory issues. Note, however that while someone with autism may appear indifferent and/or unempathic, it's almost certainly not the case; instead, the autist may not react because they can't necessarily read body language. I know all this because I have both ADHD and Autism (among other things, yay me -_-)

    • @Julieehdz1
      @Julieehdz1 Před rokem +62

      @@HeosphorosSword well yeah, I know the difference I’m just not great giving examples 😅, although I thank you for making clear the difference for those who actually don’t know.

  • @shamwow416
    @shamwow416 Před 6 měsíci +4

    Totally forgot this was the joke that reeled me into this dude, he's had a pretty great run of material since this blew up.

  • @Jakeishness
    @Jakeishness Před měsícem +2

    This is one of my favorite bits I've ever seen

  • @johkonut
    @johkonut Před 7 měsíci +6489

    The delivery of this joke is a masterclass

    • @simonmasset2238
      @simonmasset2238 Před 6 měsíci +10

      Stolen joke though

    • @DonaId_J_Trump
      @DonaId_J_Trump Před 6 měsíci

      @@simonmasset2238 Hold one while I send out an Amber Alert.

    • @DrDomich
      @DrDomich Před 6 měsíci +9

      Yeah, actually he stole it, and it was much much better in the original. I just can't seem to remember who it was. I'll try to Google it. Now, how do you Google it without triggering the Google pedophile alert? 🤔

    • @ephemeral5298
      @ephemeral5298 Před 6 měsíci +12

      ​@@DrDomichthere arent that many people that used this joke. I looked up hebephile comedian joke. All i got was a reddit post and this guy. This guy's joke dates back further than anything that was relevant so idk

    • @DrDomich
      @DrDomich Před 6 měsíci

      @@ephemeral5298 no, it was recently, I'll try to find it and post a link. I've seen it in some short or CZcams clip a few months ago, and it was done perfectly.

  • @strongestunited
    @strongestunited Před rokem +24489

    hello, i’m chris hansen and this is how to catch an ephebophile

    • @loudonheimsoth6916
      @loudonheimsoth6916 Před 9 měsíci +391

      Doesn't roll off the toungue as well.

    • @scootza1
      @scootza1 Před 7 měsíci +141

      ​@@loudonheimsoth6916still catching them sounds like the cleanest, best pleasure

    • @AubergineManDSaFxFNaF
      @AubergineManDSaFxFNaF Před 7 měsíci +22

      ​@@scootza1"cleanest"

    • @quandaviousvonheadsonzingl6453
      @quandaviousvonheadsonzingl6453 Před 7 měsíci +163

      Chris Hansen never actually called them "Pedophiles" he always calls them "Predators" which covers all of them basically

    • @gozzilla177
      @gozzilla177 Před 7 měsíci +23

      ​@@quandaviousvonheadsonzingl6453
      The worst part of that show is that most of them got slaps on the wrist because of several reasons like they never talked to minors only woman pretending to be, they showed up with intent but were stopped before any crime, and honestly it really sucks. So the only thing that show did good was prove to and show us that we need to be more vigilant on our child's lives and talk to them regularly on the dangers of both the internet and strangers. But raising awareness is quite important so it wasn't a waste at least.

  • @CrouchingTigress181
    @CrouchingTigress181 Před 5 měsíci +4

    I stopped explaining the differnece because always look at me weird when i do.

  • @Matthewwithers33
    @Matthewwithers33 Před 5 měsíci +3

    Same way you can’t explain that there is indeed a side of only fans where legitimate artistic people are trying to sell their work without sounding like a pervert that gets in there to watch smut 😂😂

  • @droidy347
    @droidy347 Před rokem +4942

    “Very interesting sir, now face the wall please”

  • @jjjlove2260
    @jjjlove2260 Před 2 lety +5196

    Exactly. As soon as he started explaining, I got suspicious of him and started wondering how he knew so much about it 😂

    • @AxelXionSora
      @AxelXionSora Před rokem +313

      I’ve fallen down that (not this specific one) Wikipedia rabbit hole before. You start on one article then you click on a link that takes you to something new and the cycle continues

    • @skylarjaxx2399
      @skylarjaxx2399 Před rokem +112

      @@AxelXionSora right I actually learned the difference via Google from a rabbit hole I'm a female and I said who would know that besides "philes"

    • @Elektrikman143
      @Elektrikman143 Před rokem +100

      @@AxelXionSora that's how I found out Dolphins fucking suck

    • @mikhail5428
      @mikhail5428 Před rokem +17

      @@AxelXionSora *I learned ephebophile and another term that isn't in this joke from a chat, I already knew about hebe*

    • @emberalexander7444
      @emberalexander7444 Před rokem +10

      Okay but this was explained on criminal minds

  • @vishakhapanwar6714
    @vishakhapanwar6714 Před 3 měsíci +2

    Each day... Each passing day... I grow fonder of this magnificent specimen of comedy😂😂❤❤❤

  • @christiananderson6761
    @christiananderson6761 Před 13 dny +1

    This is one of the best jokes of the generation

  • @ljc3484
    @ljc3484 Před rokem +7742

    He’s masterful with his delivery

    • @konerquenwo6996
      @konerquenwo6996 Před rokem +5

      🤔🤔🤔

    • @ModernZen
      @ModernZen Před rokem +47

      Agree. He figured out a way to make that hilarious. Did a great job on the punchline and used the crowd interfacing to break up the build up

    • @Aria432
      @Aria432 Před rokem +3

      No

    • @djahriman
      @djahriman Před rokem

      FOR PEDOS

    • @troll2637
      @troll2637 Před rokem

      @@Aria432 agree.

  • @Galiant2010
    @Galiant2010 Před 6 měsíci +6587

    I'm one of those people where, if I learn there's a distinction between specific terms, I like to make use of that knowledge. This is one area that I quickly learned to not be specific about lol.

    • @TheRogueX
      @TheRogueX Před 6 měsíci +234

      Same. This joke made me laugh because I understand.

    • @maddhatter3564
      @maddhatter3564 Před 6 měsíci +66

      proving his point.

    • @dm9837
      @dm9837 Před 6 měsíci +55

      I point it out every time, idgaf.

    • @Shade01982
      @Shade01982 Před 6 měsíci +29

      @@dm9837 I mean, he ain't wrong...

    • @dm9837
      @dm9837 Před 6 měsíci +12

      @@Shade01982 lol I never said anybody was wrong.

  • @Human-qs3mo
    @Human-qs3mo Před 2 měsíci +1

    I just lowkey binge watched all your shorts and I'm OBSESSED 😂

  • @DriveKnightJaden175
    @DriveKnightJaden175 Před měsícem +1

    Bro is the progenitor of "hear me out"

  • @noelle2654
    @noelle2654 Před rokem +4767

    💀literally, because when you start making those distinctions, it starts to sound like "Well at least he's NOT a pedophile" 😭

    • @anjafrohlich1170
      @anjafrohlich1170 Před rokem +119

      That's because we falsely do not give the other two terms the same weight when in reality there is not much of a moral distinction. It hardly matters which of the three terms apply to, you're not a worse or better person regardless. But judging others for having or spreading knowledge is horrible behaviour.

    • @noelle2654
      @noelle2654 Před rokem +33

      @Anja Fröhlich I agree. I don't blame people for spreading knowledge. I just think we also have to mention that children have sometimes been seen as deserving of these crimes depending on how old they are, and some genuinely feel like it's only bad if the child is prepubescent, so I think because of that, and because sane people actually have morals, we just started labeling everyone of the shitbags as a pedophile to get the point across. And to be honest, most of them probably are too. Except for those guys who are solely attracted to like 17 year Olds, the ones who are also attracted to 14 year Olds? I would put being attracted to kindergarteners past them honestly.

    • @lurklingX
      @lurklingX Před rokem +70

      young kids always seems worse. i mean, underage is not great. but as the age gets lower, it's more horrifying. single digits especially so.

    • @noelle2654
      @noelle2654 Před rokem +21

      @@lurklingX right they do seem worse. But we should just generally acknowledge that all of it is terrible.

    • @lurklingX
      @lurklingX Před rokem +16

      ​@@noelle2654 of course, all of it is indeed terrible. and it def fkks with your head. hard to say if it's worse when you are younger and don't fully understand what's happening, versus a little older and kind of do. i'm grateful that my memory at 4 yrs old is pretty shoddy. what i do remember just cuts off.
      idk i guess there's a few cases where you have younger individuals actively seeking out sexual relations and sometimes that's with older people. i see that as a form of consent (even tho kids are NOT good at making informed decisions.... and arguably neither are teenagers or anyone under 22.). but then there's the kids who get stalked, hounded, oppressed.... and that sort of thing, kid OR adult, is horrific. any form of forced relations of any kind is the WORST.
      why are there so many f'd up people out there? : (

  • @NoBloons
    @NoBloons Před rokem +8859

    "Your under arrest for being a pedophile"
    "Ah-ha! Thats a false arrest!"
    "What?"
    "I am a Hephobofile"

    • @bunnyblixt803
      @bunnyblixt803 Před rokem +194

      Someone’s gonna use this in court
      (Ok because this has happened two times now I’ll just say this IS A JOKE)

    • @atatsuki.
      @atatsuki. Před rokem

      "Aight well you're under arrest for being a Hephobofile."

    • @NoBloons
      @NoBloons Před rokem +107

      @@atatsuki. "Aw fu-"
      "STOP RESISTING"

    • @Raoul.
      @Raoul. Před rokem

      You'd only be under arrest for being a child molester, since thought crimes aren't a thing yet.

    • @user-wy3id7op5t
      @user-wy3id7op5t Před rokem +30

      Sounds like something Saul would say to defend his client for having 10TB of CP

  • @sundaibrown
    @sundaibrown Před měsícem +1

    This bit was surgically delivered. LOVED it.

  • @EncoreBetch
    @EncoreBetch Před 6 měsíci +3

    Just saw this guy and already love him😂

  • @spectre9340
    @spectre9340 Před rokem +8422

    As soon as he said "technically speaking--", my fight or flight response was activated.

    • @bsarioz
      @bsarioz Před rokem +325

      He's correct. Pedophile is usually a misused term. It's like calling a shoplifter a "pickpocketer". Both are bad, but not the same.

    • @gypsydust
      @gypsydust Před rokem +13

      @@bsarioz no. Technically speaking the way he is saying pedophile is lover of feet. He means ped- like pediatrics. Not ped- like pedal.

    • @mrspicolli
      @mrspicolli Před rokem +76

      @@bsarioz agreed and we have become far too guilty of that in America and really just the world over.
      There is a difference between rubbish and garbage.
      Irregardless is not a word.
      Redundant cannot supplement the word repetitious.
      And people have literally removed the point of the word literally by getting the dictionary people to include the way it is commonly misused which is “ figuratively“
      The thing that kills me the most and it only barely is attachable here… People who say that we live in a democracy or that we fight for democracy defend democracy yadda, here in America.
      We have never been a democracy ,not ever.(constitutional republic) democracies usually lead to dictatorship or anarchy.
      How people buy into that idea and whyfew ppl loudly criticize people for saying it is beyond me

    • @pxxnxh
      @pxxnxh Před rokem +6

      @@mrspicolli beautifully said👏👏👏

    • @lordeastwood
      @lordeastwood Před rokem +1

      @@mrspicolli Democracy is an elastic concept and not whatever black and white concept you imagine. Yes, we are a Constitutional Republic but at the same time too those representatives derive power from a democratic electorate.
      Also, there is no evidence of a democracy contributing to a dictatorship unless you intend to mean the orange goon who stole confidential documents.

  • @nenasuprobo1026
    @nenasuprobo1026 Před rokem +7623

    I once tried to explain the difference between a nerd and a geek to a friend, and true enough it was hard to do it without sounding like one or the other 😅

    • @altonlucard4317
      @altonlucard4317 Před rokem +334

      That's easy, ask a nerd and a geek what the force is. One will give you the geek answer, the other the nerd answer.

    • @herculesmclovin
      @herculesmclovin Před rokem +32

      ​@@altonlucard4317 I need examples 🤷‍♂️ haha

    • @nenasuprobo1026
      @nenasuprobo1026 Před rokem +22

      @@altonlucard4317 This is so on point lol.

    • @fulana_de_tal
      @fulana_de_tal Před rokem +391

      ​​@@herculesmclovin one will say that it's mass times acceleration (or another definition), the other will say that it's the base of the magic system in star wars
      Now this comment makes me look like both a nerd, a geek, and stupid

    • @herculesmclovin
      @herculesmclovin Před rokem +56

      @@fulana_de_tal 😂 I appreciate it.. I can see the difference now with each haha

  • @chadthedad03
    @chadthedad03 Před 6 měsíci +2

    Great joke. It's funny, truthful, and you learn something along the way.. 😂

  • @expertexcavatinginc
    @expertexcavatinginc Před měsícem +1

    Excellent delivery!!!! Wow.

  • @bengieDMZ
    @bengieDMZ Před 2 lety +25923

    I like how they laughed the instant he said
    “Now hear me out”
    They knew what was coming 😂

    • @abrahema383
      @abrahema383 Před 2 lety +9

      Hear*

    • @bengieDMZ
      @bengieDMZ Před 2 lety +8

      @@abrahema383 ah right thanks autocorrect

    • @abrahema383
      @abrahema383 Před 2 lety

      @@bengieDMZ np, wasn't trying to be a douche either

    • @nicolasgarro4180
      @nicolasgarro4180 Před 2 lety +4

      Thats a fake crowd

    • @galacticeclipsis3240
      @galacticeclipsis3240 Před 2 lety +50

      @@nicolasgarro4180 "Thats a fake crowd" at the end they literally show the people in the fucking crowd

  • @Xylem44
    @Xylem44 Před rokem +6674

    Reminds me of when R Kelly asked “how old” when asked if he was attached to teenagers. Lol 😂

    • @ieshiaaa
      @ieshiaaa Před rokem +330

      Lol, I remember that! I remember saying to my screen, "Man, what chu mean how old?!" He was trippin'. Lol😂

    • @ballarddionna
      @ballarddionna Před rokem +203

      Lol well 18 and 19 year olds are teenagers

    • @ziggyzhane7620
      @ziggyzhane7620 Před rokem +46

      Deadass. Makes you think we played ourselves laughing/being shocked at that moment

    • @potatowellcox8870
      @potatowellcox8870 Před rokem +205

      @@ballarddionna The answer should be none when you’re in your 30s

    • @fredhasopinions
      @fredhasopinions Před rokem +90

      @@potatowellcox8870 I once dated a 31 year old when I'd just turned 19 and I was fine with it then and I'm fine with it now. I knew what I was doing and managed to leave the relationship when I wanted to without being manipulated etc., and I had a life at the time. Is it really that much of a taboo?

  • @tiggobitties2514
    @tiggobitties2514 Před 2 měsíci +1

    He almost bombed until the punchline

  • @user-zm7sf9wi9w
    @user-zm7sf9wi9w Před 6 měsíci +1

    This video just made my heart melt.

  • @AcePlaysTCGs
    @AcePlaysTCGs Před rokem +3487

    The "I promise this goes well" is my favorite part. This is my kind of joke.

    • @iGaveLiaHIV
      @iGaveLiaHIV Před rokem +14

      Personally I like the Daniel tosh style. "Hang in there it gets worse before it gets better"

    • @AcePlaysTCGs
      @AcePlaysTCGs Před rokem +7

      @@iGaveLiaHIV that's always a classic style. Responding to the groans is like saying "I know you hate this, but you paid to be here so bear with me. Trust me. I wouldn't be taking us on this journey if it wasn't worth it."

    • @createdforthemoment6740
      @createdforthemoment6740 Před rokem

      It's like Sean Locks "if I could being anyone back to life, I'd being Hitler......"

    • @Christopher-yl6cn
      @Christopher-yl6cn Před rokem

      Love the dudes body language and stuff he adds in the middle of his jokes! (Hold on I promise this will go well) stuff like that! His diction and annunciation body animation. Delivery impeccable

  • @catrein4687
    @catrein4687 Před rokem +3877

    He moves like a cartoon character, its hillarious

    • @bagelrat1808
      @bagelrat1808 Před rokem +10

      Omg he does haha 😂😂

    • @eunoia3926
      @eunoia3926 Před rokem +4

      For real🤣😂😂🤣

    • @lincolnblake8012
      @lincolnblake8012 Před rokem +1

      Just noticed 🤣🤣🤣

    • @AintNoWayItsYoshii
      @AintNoWayItsYoshii Před rokem +1

      He is just Italian, my Physics teacher was way worse (I'm morrocan, but was born and still live in Italy)

  • @j.lombardo
    @j.lombardo Před 5 měsíci +1

    This is one of my favorite jokes

  • @Beastly_Chariot
    @Beastly_Chariot Před 2 měsíci +1

    This shit is perfect man, from the set up to the end delivery, brilliant ❤

  • @beeniecat9411
    @beeniecat9411 Před rokem +5565

    Yeah one of them "the more you know the more it bites you back for knowing"

    • @kaynor1260
      @kaynor1260 Před rokem +15

      What will, I'm scared

    • @harinkim8082
      @harinkim8082 Před rokem +11

      Definitely, I don’t know if this in the right context but I remembered my friend was catholic and she was like are you stalking me how do you know that.

    • @santinodelgado281
      @santinodelgado281 Před rokem +3

      ​@@kaynor1260 Secrets from the FBI and CIA kick real hard.

    • @moonshine_starlight
      @moonshine_starlight Před rokem

      Lol🤣🤣

    • @kedabro1957
      @kedabro1957 Před rokem +13

      Yeah like ... ever try to explain the difference between Communism and Socialism and Marxism to the wrong group of friends?

  • @sakurafalls2468
    @sakurafalls2468 Před 2 lety +3876

    Prosecutor: "Can you testify that you are not a ped0phile?"
    Predator: "I most certainly can. I am a hebephile."
    Judge: "Case dismissed."

    • @midnytemassacre
      @midnytemassacre Před 2 lety +25

      Law is different than basic language, lol, but I get your point.

    • @arronbenit5660
      @arronbenit5660 Před 2 lety +36

      The law dont care what you're attracted to. They care about the people you hurt

    • @firefly9838
      @firefly9838 Před 2 lety +17

      @@arronbenit5660 just be real careful not to hurt them then.

    • @catchthewind8563
      @catchthewind8563 Před 2 lety +2

      That's when we bring out the shotguns right?

    • @Waffle___House
      @Waffle___House Před 2 lety +17

      This might be surprising to hear, but it’s not illegal to be a pedophile in any of the 50 states

  • @nevertellmethaoddz8581
    @nevertellmethaoddz8581 Před měsícem

    One of my favorite bits ever. Everything about it is flawless lmao

  • @danparish1344
    @danparish1344 Před 2 měsíci +1

    “I’m not a pedo, I just study it”

  • @WillRennar
    @WillRennar Před 6 měsíci +2466

    The fact he had to spend that much time saying "hear me out for a sec" demonstrates that final point.

  • @i_am_thebatman
    @i_am_thebatman Před 6 měsíci +7810

    R Kelly
    “When you say teenagers how old are we talking ?”

    • @fpsgames8188
      @fpsgames8188 Před 6 měsíci +97

      Took me a second. 😂💀
      Teen - age. That's technically, TECHNICALLY all the 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, and up to 19.

    • @derekiskindacrazy1541
      @derekiskindacrazy1541 Před 6 měsíci

      ​@fpsgames8188 that's gay as fuckkk where do you live i looked it up and its up to 17 not 19 that would be nuts if its not bad enough already we should be adults at 15 or 16 at the most if not way younger like after puberty it would benefit us all we would learn soooooooo much more by the time we get to 18 rather then be brain washed into thinking we don't have the right to make are own choices litterly babying us then we turn 18 and we get out of the house and are like wtf do we do it litterly fucks us I swear I almost believe they make us minors to make sure they waste all of the best years of learning wasting are lives in school are brains learn the most by far better up until we are 18 so they just waste are life

    • @Nate101Dawg
      @Nate101Dawg Před 6 měsíci +31

      @@fpsgames8188 It was a joke my guy not a test. You also failed if it was a test you edited your answer ffs.... wtf

    • @fpsgames8188
      @fpsgames8188 Před 6 měsíci +39

      @@Nate101Dawg I know it was a joke, hence the laughing emoji.
      My response was also a continuation of the joke. I edited my response to add the second "TECHNICALLY" in capital letters, to mimic the emphasis by the comedian in the original video.
      Pretty sure we are all in agreement with the punch line of the video. 👍

    • @Locopueblo
      @Locopueblo Před 6 měsíci

      “18 and over or 16 or under” -R Kelly in his song ‘I like the crotch on you’

  • @SashaMonsteraki
    @SashaMonsteraki Před 4 měsíci +22

    Bro, I am not a murderer! He survived, so it's only "attempted" murder!

    • @SauceAppleEater_2885
      @SauceAppleEater_2885 Před 2 měsíci +3

      By definition no, you are not a murderer, and you don't get charged with murder, you get charged with attempted murder.

  • @WaqasAli-os6oo
    @WaqasAli-os6oo Před měsícem

    Perfect delivery. Ive watched this at least 20 times and laughed my ass off every time 😂

  • @MrMafiks
    @MrMafiks Před rokem +5923

    "Your honor, im attracted to 18 year olds"
    "Okay?" Kicks you out of court

    • @s.s5933
      @s.s5933 Před rokem +112

      - you didn’t have to cut me off

    • @MrJoeylj
      @MrJoeylj Před rokem +67

      ​@@s.s5933 🎵🎶"Change your number like we was nothing. You didn't have stoop so low. .....

    • @ShotoTodoroki7504.....
      @ShotoTodoroki7504..... Před rokem +40

      ​@@s.s5933make out like it never happened and that we were nothing

    • @FuryousD
      @FuryousD Před rokem +45

      I mean that's actually legal since u are an adult at the age of 18 and can have sex with anyone else above the age of 18.

    • @MrMafiks
      @MrMafiks Před rokem +9

      @@FuryousD Exactly

  • @DurvalLacerda
    @DurvalLacerda Před 2 lety +3105

    This is what I call a "perfect joke". The context, the set up and the punch line. It's all beautiful

    • @666deadmau5
      @666deadmau5 Před 2 lety +35

      a “perfect joke” as defined by professional comedians is when no words can be added or taken away to improve said joke.

    • @CMMCMXCV
      @CMMCMXCV Před 2 lety +10

      I wish I hadn’t seen him do this on his Instagram before he tried it live cuz I knew verbatim what he was gonna say 🥲

    • @vminshi
      @vminshi Před 2 lety +2

      Fr

    • @Jmortonvids
      @Jmortonvids Před 2 lety +9

      I thought the same thing. Honed to perfection in every way. True talent here

    • @musicstuff698
      @musicstuff698 Před 2 lety +14

      A “perfect joke” that was stolen from another comedian

  • @antihero8214
    @antihero8214 Před měsícem

    bro was like don’t cancel me yet 🤣

  • @nerd_world8919
    @nerd_world8919 Před 2 měsíci

    This is one of my favorite jokes. I love the whole “hear me out! Let me explain!” At the beginning

  • @mymom9741
    @mymom9741 Před 2 lety +4148

    "When you say teen-age how old are we talking?"

    • @ikannunaplays
      @ikannunaplays Před 2 lety +80

      @Khaliil bin Ammar "Teen age" ..... Thir-teen, Four-teen, Fifth-teen..... any number that ends in teen......?
      There isn't a Telve-teen or ten-teen in case you're trying to size yourself up.

    • @SAGE795
      @SAGE795 Před 2 lety +250

      If you make it to 113 years old you can have another 7 teenage years.

    • @TheSmily4ever
      @TheSmily4ever Před 2 lety +4

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @mymom9741
      @mymom9741 Před 2 lety +112

      Lol i know what a teenager is yall.... the joke was a reference from an interview when the interview asked R Kelly do you like teenage girls. And R Kelly replied by asking him that.

    • @wolffang1060
      @wolffang1060 Před 2 lety +6

      @@SAGE795 my new goal

  • @mildlyamusing7213
    @mildlyamusing7213 Před 10 měsíci +5359

    Nah whenever your homie says “hear me out” you already know he’s gonna say something vile 😂

    • @shortznig2938
      @shortznig2938 Před 7 měsíci +44

      Damn I guess that doesn't apply in this case then.

    • @omgblastbeatslol
      @omgblastbeatslol Před 7 měsíci +15

      What exactly did he say that was vile?

    • @usmh
      @usmh Před 6 měsíci +25

      Whenever he says that it means he's gonna say something reasonable which peer pressure-sensitive idiots object to.

    • @FreeWorldSpirit313
      @FreeWorldSpirit313 Před 6 měsíci +2

      ​@@omgblastbeatslolthe truth.

    • @n1co2017
      @n1co2017 Před 6 měsíci +4

      @@usmhnah bro some of the shit we say 💀💀💀 there is a reason why the boy's group chat is fucking classified.

  • @windykellems2374
    @windykellems2374 Před měsícem

    I stop to watch this every time I see it and it never gets old. His delivery is perfect, it really couldn't be done better than this. 11/10, I laugh every time, even though I have it memorized at this point.

  • @Nippleless_Cage
    @Nippleless_Cage Před 3 měsíci +1

    This was the joke that brought me to Gianmarco and he's now my favorite CZcams comic.

  • @Drekromancer
    @Drekromancer Před rokem +11207

    Amazingly handled joke. He was dancing on the knife's edge the whole time, yet he made it look easy!

    • @DrKhabo
      @DrKhabo Před rokem +20

      I’m still stanning 🤞🏾🤞🏾🤞🏾🤣🤣🤣

    • @lurklingX
      @lurklingX Před rokem +6

      well said!! that's what i was thinking.

    • @jeffmattel7867
      @jeffmattel7867 Před rokem

      Kid of sad when you think about it. This fking world where everyone gets offended cause they somehow get satisfaction out getting offended. People actively look for shit to get offended. It is a fking joke people.

    • @spyder027
      @spyder027 Před rokem +4

      Those are the best jokes

    • @clintonharvey2384
      @clintonharvey2384 Před rokem +3

      Bruh this man was a snail on a razor blade for the ENTIRE bit 😂😂😂😂

  • @BrandonP43
    @BrandonP43 Před rokem +3052

    Bro probably came up with this joke while explaining this, and was like “oh shit I sound like one huh”

    • @alehlete830
      @alehlete830 Před rokem +2

      ?

    • @BrandonP43
      @BrandonP43 Před rokem +95

      @@alehlete830 he probably tried to explain the difference between the different “philes” to someone and thought to himself. “Damn I sound like a pedophile”

    • @justforever96
      @justforever96 Před rokem +20

      That's how jokes are created, yes

    • @BrandonP43
      @BrandonP43 Před rokem +45

      @@justforever96 not always. A lot of these comedians sit down and write shit out instead of letting it flow naturally in convo and reenacting.

    • @randomguy-je7ny
      @randomguy-je7ny Před rokem +6

      He just stole it, the actor for the doctor from hangover made the original joke in a stand up routine

  • @adityabothra6678
    @adityabothra6678 Před měsícem

    This was the best joke ever made on this topic😂😂😂😂

  • @SQBfromOB
    @SQBfromOB Před měsícem +1

    I love his music still and always will

  • @vicious_rhubarb2247
    @vicious_rhubarb2247 Před rokem +8294

    I legit thought the punchline was gonna be "It's hard to explain the difference to an 8 year old" 💀

  • @Generalcheese44
    @Generalcheese44 Před 2 lety +15873

    He has got a point

    • @hycraut
      @hycraut Před 2 lety +17

      1k likes and no replies? U serious?

    • @vellgrynd
      @vellgrynd Před 2 lety +18

      @@hycraut 1 k likes and 1 reply

    • @mike285
      @mike285 Před 2 lety +9

      Megadeth 🤘🏼

    • @yan9491
      @yan9491 Před 2 lety +5

      He has a point*

    • @fuju7871
      @fuju7871 Před 2 lety +51

      @@yan9491 could you even believe how WRONG you are there?

  • @sarahe2274
    @sarahe2274 Před 3 měsíci +7

    I was LITERALLY thinking "why did he put so much thought into this 🤨" before the joke landed 😂😂😂

  • @NatsuDragn33I
    @NatsuDragn33I Před měsícem

    That's flawless delivery right there. It truly is

  • @bentobul5932
    @bentobul5932 Před 6 měsíci +7630

    This just shows how much body language/tone of voice are very important parts of this craft. The delivery is what makes this so great!!

    • @DeltaKaiNi
      @DeltaKaiNi Před 6 měsíci +5

      It's over the top to the point of being unfunny

    • @TheCollapse410
      @TheCollapse410 Před 6 měsíci +10

      ​@@DeltaKaiNiBlack ppl in 2000- u only want to arrest r Kelly cause he's black!
      Black ppl in 2016- u didn't arrest r Kelly cause he was attacking black women!
      Sums up everything.

    • @koolkidyouknow
      @koolkidyouknow Před 6 měsíci +28

      ​@@DeltaKaiNiYour comment is negative and unfunny just stop.

    • @mohammadrahim408
      @mohammadrahim408 Před 6 měsíci

      @@koolkidyouknowlol hope you’re doing better these days kidd

    • @koolkidyouknow
      @koolkidyouknow Před 6 měsíci

      @@mohammadrahim408 Get help.

  • @blackgold2521
    @blackgold2521 Před rokem +2696

    He's so right b/c I was side-eyeing all that.

    • @wolfdeathnogames5314
      @wolfdeathnogames5314 Před rokem +81

      his ending note makes you realize why he was explaining it that way to begin with and either gives you the ooooooh or outright laughter of the absurdity that he nailed it perfectly

    • @anotherperson6934
      @anotherperson6934 Před rokem +7

      @@wolfdeathnogames5314 lmao, that was me. I was side eyeing him. After his finish, I laughed do damn hard, even though I knew there were separations between adolances, pre pubescent, etc.

    • @wolfdeathnogames5314
      @wolfdeathnogames5314 Před rokem

      @@anotherperson6934 I did not know any of this till he explained it and my first thought before he clarified the makes you sound like a pedo to state this was like why does he know this >.> face and then I bursted out laughing when he said the punchline

  • @erictfn9751
    @erictfn9751 Před 18 dny +3

    Who came back to rewatch after the drake updated version?

  • @96Logan
    @96Logan Před 3 měsíci +1

    Dude, I'm sharing this with everyone I know! Get ready for this one, Meemaw 😂

  • @HrPedrosak
    @HrPedrosak Před 6 měsíci +4306

    Masterfully done. Goes right to the edge and pulls it back instantly withthe punchline. Engenius!

  • @chupapi7592
    @chupapi7592 Před rokem +3050

    "technically speaking-"
    audience: funniest shit I've ever heard

  • @Snomrade
    @Snomrade Před 23 dny

    It started with an “oh no” and ended with laughter

  • @majalisaavery6635
    @majalisaavery6635 Před 4 měsíci

    Gotta love vocabulary! Masterfully delivered!😂

  • @phoenix8984
    @phoenix8984 Před rokem +11221

    Minecraft CZcamsrs explaining that they're not pedophiles after getting caught red-handed grooming 13 year old girls be like.

    • @Flat_Earth_Addy
      @Flat_Earth_Addy Před rokem +21

      I don't get it.

    • @lakshyasingh4114
      @lakshyasingh4114 Před 11 měsíci +137

      @@Flat_Earth_Addydream a Minecraft CZcamsr was caught doing this shit

    • @Flat_Earth_Addy
      @Flat_Earth_Addy Před 11 měsíci +15

      @@lakshyasingh4114 No. That's not even possible.

    • @gamer9smith
      @gamer9smith Před 10 měsíci +174

      @@Flat_Earth_AddyWhat do you mean by that? Also tf is your username

    • @dendooz1059
      @dendooz1059 Před 10 měsíci +23

      ​@@lakshyasingh4114Source?