Trump Couldn't Stay Awake During His New York Criminal Trial

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  • čas přidán 17. 05. 2024
  • Seth addresses the Biden administration easing federal restrictions on marijuana, the House passing a bill to remove gray wolves from the endangered species list and more in his monologue for Wednesday, May 1.
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    Trump Couldn't Stay Awake During His New York Criminal Trial - Late Night with Seth Meyers
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Komentáře • 341

  • @mrm7058
    @mrm7058 Před 15 dny +453

    The problem is not that Trump falls asleep - the problem is that he wakes up again.

  • @biggrayalien4791
    @biggrayalien4791 Před 15 dny +215

    I love how Trump ran with "sleepy Joe" as an insult for months and now he's falling asleep in court like he's got a problem. Oh the hubris, oh the irony, of the sweet sweet hypocrisy.

    • @GrimJerr
      @GrimJerr Před 15 dny

      Dementia J Trump is 100% Projection

    • @plaidpanda
      @plaidpanda Před 15 dny +14

      The schadenfreude makes me feel warm all over.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Před 15 dny +9

      Fool still running with it, as little as 20 hours ago.

    • @dietotaku
      @dietotaku Před 15 dny +12

      wbk every accusation is a confession

    • @Lawlzinator
      @Lawlzinator Před 15 dny

      Just admit, we’re all objectively worse off under Biden

  • @schattentaenzerin
    @schattentaenzerin Před 15 dny +153

    I yelled "SCOLLINS!" and raised my morning juice glass to him before Seth acknowledged him 😂🥃

    • @ginadelsasso288
      @ginadelsasso288 Před 15 dny +10

      I wasn't sure if it was him or not, but when he gave Scollins the shout out for the joke, I heard "Scollins!" In my head in Seth's Voice. That was a dam good snake joke. Lmao

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny

      Seth had better watch his back as Scollins becomes the new fan favorite . . .

    • @ellaohara9305
      @ellaohara9305 Před 15 dny +1

      I knew it as soon as the words came out...

    • @MajorEmptySet
      @MajorEmptySet Před 15 dny +1

      i miss corrections too

  • @chrislom5288
    @chrislom5288 Před 15 dny +63

    You even THINK about replacing Wally and I will get out my letter-scribing quill and give you a choice-cut piece of my mind...

    • @jb888888888
      @jb888888888 Před 15 dny +14

      Write it on a 2'x3' piece of white cardboard. Seth will automatically read it.

    • @Matthew-ve7uv
      @Matthew-ve7uv Před 15 dny +5

      Jb: Brilliant

    • @genakirby
      @genakirby Před 14 dny

      @@jb888888888bahahhahahaha

  • @Mugulian
    @Mugulian Před 15 dny +13

    Correction: Gotta talk to graphics again. The snake shown with the plane is not an anaconda.

  • @cbpd89
    @cbpd89 Před 15 dny +24

    Those teleprompters can have Wally's job over my dead body. Cue cards forever!

  • @dietotaku
    @dietotaku Před 15 dny +26

    props to scollins for not insisting he be the stock photo model for that anaconda joke

  • @HellHunter00
    @HellHunter00 Před 15 dny +117

    Correction(BRING IT BACK!) - The Texas law doesn't just mandate an 'are you 18 years old - yes or no' prompt, it requires sites to verify the age of users with a government-issued ID or reasonable alternative.

    • @chaseaustin8677
      @chaseaustin8677 Před 15 dny

      Except the porn sites refuse to hold your personal data so they just leave the state and all the shady sites with scary things like unverified ages of the participants in the porn completely take over. Get a grip and stop making moronic laws that can be enforced

    • @dannglover-uc
      @dannglover-uc Před 15 dny +16

      Worst of all it makes you upload a picture of your grandma.

    • @stephenjames2951
      @stephenjames2951 Před 15 dny +12

      Basically no access is being allowed by the sites if you are in Texas.

    • @likebot.
      @likebot. Před 15 dny

      wiTh ZeRo cHaNcE oF tHe PuBLiC's dATa bEiNg hAcKed AnD LEaKed oN ThE dArK WeB.

    • @kasnitch
      @kasnitch Před 15 dny

      I would say Mexico is welcome to have Texas back .. but they probably wouldn't want it .

  • @xyxean
    @xyxean Před 15 dny +10

    That gym jordan joke was underrated

  • @cindywells9119
    @cindywells9119 Před 15 dny +56

    To reiterate, TSA is now on the lookout for trouser snakes.👖🐍😂

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 15 dny +13

    Kristi Noem doesn’t need that puppy’s shock collar anymore. Maybe that’ll help Trump stay awake.

  • @edfagan4251
    @edfagan4251 Před 15 dny +7

    Kept watching to make sure wally got his appearance fee.

  • @that_jason_black
    @that_jason_black Před 15 dny +5

    POTUS and Seth Go Day Reefering.

  • @sherinameless1618
    @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny +26

    Did not Seth say that there would be a Kristi Noem joke every day this week? And yet there was not. He should have had her put down Jim Jordon in the House gym. For as they say, a Noem joke a day keeps the dachshund away.

    • @abigailkaterbergcolibaba
      @abigailkaterbergcolibaba Před 15 dny +17

      He said he did two yesterday so he could take today off 😂😂😂

    • @KingOfAllJackals
      @KingOfAllJackals Před 15 dny +5

      It was a dead dog joke every day? If so, the McWolf joke is a stretch but I’ll allow it

  • @clusterfuct
    @clusterfuct Před 15 dny +5

    CORRECTION: The photo you showed for Disney's Michelin star restaurant joke is inaccurate. Victoria and Albert's doesn't allow children in the restaurant. Also it's not in the parks, it's in the Grand Floridian Resort.

  • @chrislom5288
    @chrislom5288 Před 15 dny +13

    "Isn't it past your jail time?" --Jimmy K.

  • @qawamity
    @qawamity Před 15 dny +5

    Still waiting for The Epic Adventures of Wally and the Sea Captain.

  • @sherinameless1618
    @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny +45

    The Scollins joke was that the man who was arrested for smuggling anacondas in his pants thought it was all worth if for a racy headline in the local paper. The logic that Seth needs to discuss with him is that there are no more local papers.

  • @seattlegrrlie
    @seattlegrrlie Před 15 dny +4

    Thank you Scollins

  • @NoJusticeNoPeace
    @NoJusticeNoPeace Před 15 dny +9

    Does Wally get paid more when he laughs or only when he speaks? Does "ha ha ha" qualify for ACTRA rates?

    • @LookinGoodAnya
      @LookinGoodAnya Před 14 dny +2

      I heard an "ok" as well, I'd say that counts. Give Wally the big bucks!

  • @sainjawoof3506
    @sainjawoof3506 Před 15 dny +13

    Please don't make the wolf issue a joke. When recently a case of a year old pup was run over with a vehicle( considered a valid way of hunting them in some States), then her muzzle was taped and she had heinous things done to her.

    • @lifewuzonceezr
      @lifewuzonceezr Před 15 dny +6

      WTAF!?

    • @sainjawoof3506
      @sainjawoof3506 Před 15 dny +1

      @@lifewuzonceezr Cody Roberts, Wyoming

    • @RIPTiggy
      @RIPTiggy Před 14 dny +2

      Some people are sick in the head. The $250 fine that this man got for his crime is a drop in the bucket for those who practice such cruelty. Ugh.

    • @wctrqn
      @wctrqn Před 13 dny +1

      Please keep wolves protected!!

  • @HeartlesSv420
    @HeartlesSv420 Před 15 dny +23

    Anybody else tired of these monkey fightin' snakes on these Monday to Friday planes?
    Side note: I'll never understand how the TV edit made that line better & worse at the same time. 😂

    • @TheThirdDaySH
      @TheThirdDaySH Před 15 dny +1

      I've only ever seen the movie on cable TV so that line is canon to me.

    • @derkeheath5172
      @derkeheath5172 Před 15 dny

      If you haven't seen the TV edit of The BIg Lebowski, you must remedy that PRONTO.

    • @HeartlesSv420
      @HeartlesSv420 Před 15 dny +1

      @@derkeheath5172 I'm one of those heathens that hasn't seen that movie, at all. And yet, oddly enough I feel like I have seen it thanks to all the memes. 😂

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 15 dny +5

    House Representatives used the gym? Their muscular progress is as slow as their passing of laws.

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny

      They used it to watch TikTok videos, and to have clique meetings.

  • @dannglover-uc
    @dannglover-uc Před 15 dny +5

    I think the wolf is safe. I doubt McDonald’s even uses real chicken.

  • @bmeclipse
    @bmeclipse Před 15 dny +20

    Love the Wally ‘Stache.

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage Před 15 dny +33

    100% Joe calls it 'devil's lettuce'.

  • @philoctetes_wordsworth
    @philoctetes_wordsworth Před 15 dny +33

    There exist no creatures whom should ever, ever be removed from an Endangered list. We are all endangered now, and most especially the creatures living outside of corporate farms.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Před 15 dny

      Wildlife isn’t safe within a thousand miles of corporations, especially chemical & petroleum producers. The first thing they do is eradicate all life, leaving a small wetlands reserve… that their runoff pollutes.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Před 15 dny

      No creature is safe within a thousand miles of corporations. Can’t elaborate due to YT censoring. Hopefully John Oliver will do an exposé.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Před 15 dny +1

      *corporations. Period.
      YT censor doesn’t allow explanation.

  • @ashtree7213
    @ashtree7213 Před 15 dny +15

    Seth said 'restaurants' like an Irish person the first time!!

    • @goransemb5689
      @goransemb5689 Před 15 dny +1

      At least he didn't say "rest-rooms"!

    • @ashtree7213
      @ashtree7213 Před 15 dny

      @goransemb5689 Yeah! When I heard it first, I was trying to decipher if Seth was saying restrooms or restaurants... It's never a question for an Irish person as we almost never use the word restrooms, usual only when speaking to an American

    • @kennyn1992
      @kennyn1992 Před 15 dny

      @@goransemb5689 Or as Trump calls them; courtrooms.

  • @mysterialite
    @mysterialite Před 15 dny +4

    I always thought you were saying "and that was the monologue" but I see the cue card says "a monologue". Wild!

    • @Matthew-ve7uv
      @Matthew-ve7uv Před 15 dny

      Since COVID, when it wasn't a the Late Show, it was A late show

  • @S.Shea2432
    @S.Shea2432 Před 15 dny +16

    Seth this was hilarious as usual. 🤣🤣

  • @zepmarq
    @zepmarq Před 15 dny +1

    The McWolf and the snake in the pants bits made me lol.

  • @Cecilia-ei8uu
    @Cecilia-ei8uu Před 15 dny +10

    Restrunts!🤣🤣🤣

  • @thebabypenguin2
    @thebabypenguin2 Před 15 dny +1

    Why was there no snakes on a plane joke for the literal snake on the plane?

  • @NickMACK1473
    @NickMACK1473 Před 15 dny +6

    Watching from Grenada in the Caribbean

  • @rockdocandlittlebird5974
    @rockdocandlittlebird5974 Před 15 dny +2

    Wally is like half the reason Seth is my favorite... that and Corrections.

  • @wctrqn
    @wctrqn Před 13 dny

    I do love Seth’s monologue.

  • @user-pl1yp1tj8b
    @user-pl1yp1tj8b Před 15 dny +4

    Anacondas are pretty big, but I didn't think they were KAIJU-sized... HOW DID A BAG OF THEM FIT IN SOMEONE'S PANTS!?!?

  • @TheRealBlueValhalla
    @TheRealBlueValhalla Před 15 dny +18

    Wolves are a critical species.

    • @GrimJerr
      @GrimJerr Před 15 dny +5

      Apex predators actually keep other animal species healthy and thriving. A reef without Sharks is not as vibrant and teaming with life as one without.

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny

      Jackals are pretty critical too. 😉

  • @jeffb.6642
    @jeffb.6642 Před 15 dny +3

    The McWolf looks like a sandwich that literally could bite back.

  • @davidav8orpflanz561
    @davidav8orpflanz561 Před 15 dny +2

    Trump sleeping in Court, is how he also got thru school...except he can't pay someone else now to do his "Court Exams", or "Cross-examinations"...😅
    Can I get a witness!😅

  • @SpencerBuchanan
    @SpencerBuchanan Před 15 dny +4

    Am I a jackal when I know a Scollins joke before you say it is a Scollins joke?

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny +2

      Yes. You are now a member of a proud, brave, persnickety community. Dues are $25 a month. Welcome to the pack!

    • @genakirby
      @genakirby Před 14 dny

      Same

    • @SpencerBuchanan
      @SpencerBuchanan Před 11 dny

      @@sherinameless1618 Do we collectively just bill Seth anyways. He says he has such a large budget.

  • @cheeseandpickles4506
    @cheeseandpickles4506 Před 15 dny +6

    I'm quite sure he has advanced diabetes and it fogs his mind. I should know, I have diabetes. -Wilford Brimley, probably

  • @QNFirefly
    @QNFirefly Před 15 dny +2

    Hey trump lawyers try a shock collar.

  • @MariaBareiss
    @MariaBareiss Před 15 dny

    1:38 "Look at all those dumbells!" joke averted!

  • @Pidxr
    @Pidxr Před 15 dny +1

    Wolves are people too !

  • @samanthab1923
    @samanthab1923 Před 15 dny +3

    Where are the Addies when he needs them? 😂

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 15 dny +3

    TSA Agent: “Is that a snake in your pants or are you happy to see me?”

    • @lynnlamusga
      @lynnlamusga Před 15 dny +1

      LOL, nobody is ever happy to see the TSA

  • @emilyking9558
    @emilyking9558 Před 15 dny +1

    Don’t even joke about Wally like that. He is a treasure

  • @sherinameless1618
    @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny +6

    The Aaron Sorkin TV series about Facebook, "Thumbs Up for Insurrections," or maybe "West Wingnuts," sounds like just the kind of thing Facebook users will enjoy.

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 15 dny +1

    Kevin Costner can Dance With Wolves again.

  • @andreitorres5503
    @andreitorres5503 Před 15 dny +2

    I love grey wolves, that’s sad news 😢

  • @gl15col
    @gl15col Před 15 dny +1

    Why pay big bucks for a trouser snake, when you can pick one up in the Everglades, and I'm pretty sure they will also pay you a bounty! Win/win!

  • @llobinske
    @llobinske Před 15 dny +1

    I'm getting to where I can successfully predict if Scallins (sp?) wrote the joke. 😂

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny +1

      If a joke seems so bad it's good, it's a Scollins! 🗿

  • @raymondm.9954
    @raymondm.9954 Před 15 dny +1

    I know someone who flew from Arizona to Boston with at least two snakes wrapped around her.

  • @CousinWhatIsIt
    @CousinWhatIsIt Před 15 dny

    Please do a special episode of Corrections just to cover that wolf-burger graphic.

  • @starfoxorigins
    @starfoxorigins Před 15 dny +4

    1:09 lmfao the McWolf joke belongs on Surprise Inspection

  • @chrishubbard8477
    @chrishubbard8477 Před 15 dny

    Walie getting PAID!!😂 + sympathy points 😢😂! Now you have to talk to him about the joke in Corrections...so he will get paid again!🎉😂😂😂😂😂

  • @jocoro29
    @jocoro29 Před 15 dny +3

    The macWolf? I thougth the joke was going to be about the trump supporter that shot his puppy

  • @kennyn1992
    @kennyn1992 Před 15 dny +1

    Did indeed take a day off for the Noem joke. Just to note. Cricket was not quite an untrainable puppy. She taught him down.

  • @clarencehowell1986
    @clarencehowell1986 Před 15 dny

    He nailed the snake joke. 😂

  • @leahmcdaniel4800
    @leahmcdaniel4800 Před 15 dny +1

    Please, please say Corrections isn’t over!! I was that new viewer you were so sure you weren’t picking up. I spent a week of evenings laughing like a lunatic alone in my bedroom while watching them all in order! My family def thought I’d finally gone off the deep end.I felt like I found MY PEOPLE in Seth and his writers and the jackals! I still laugh out loud, even in wildly inappropriate moments, when I think of the knitted or crocheted (yeah, let me know!) Cicada Cicada costume episode or the song Seth sings while making the Seth jackals smooch “🎶 We’re gonna f@!k in your nightmares 🎶”. I can’t survive this election season without Corrections.
    That is all… 🤞

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Před 15 dny

      We will know in the next 5 hours or so. Probably. The way Seth has been playing with us, I am not sure of anything any more. But I do welcome you to the Jackal pack.

  • @scottgillespie8011
    @scottgillespie8011 Před 15 dny +2

    “Reefer!” Gee, Seth (51 year old white guy), tell us what you call it.

  • @flackstar007
    @flackstar007 Před 15 dny +4

    LEAVE WALLY ALONE!
    I think we need to form the protect wally from Seth's jokes alliance.
    Maybe we cal call ourselves the "Alliance for the protection of Wally of all the trees!"
    PS: No need to correct this as it's perfect and in no way incorrect or tarnished by "mysteaks" of any kind...

  • @KeithJackson-ux7eh
    @KeithJackson-ux7eh Před 15 dny +1

    I predict he will fall asleep in court one day and not wake up. The stress is killing him 😂

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Před 15 dny +1

      🍻

    • @KeithJackson-ux7eh
      @KeithJackson-ux7eh Před 15 dny +1

      @@sunshine3914 can’t find my glasses. No idea what emoji that is🤷‍♂️

    • @freya8133
      @freya8133 Před 15 dny

      ​@@KeithJackson-ux7ehbeer mugs.

    • @KeithJackson-ux7eh
      @KeithJackson-ux7eh Před 15 dny

      @@freya8133 don’t have any 🤷‍♂️

    • @alphabetsoup488
      @alphabetsoup488 Před 14 dny

      When they took down and burned the American Flag and put the Palestinian Flag up, it broke my heart. So much hatred and division, I guess that's what a real INSURECTION looks like! You win SETH MEYERS! If you want your name removed, you got it!

  • @ddrsamuraixIV
    @ddrsamuraixIV Před 15 dny

    First of all, of course it was Scollins. Second, can we get the "leave em alone guy" to yell at Seth for that joke about Wally!?

  • @millenialmonster
    @millenialmonster Před 15 dny

    The saddest thing is that there will be no Corrections to this. 🌜😢

  • @bryan9931
    @bryan9931 Před 15 dny +1

    Hey Wally.

  • @lifewuzonceezr
    @lifewuzonceezr Před 15 dny +2

    I still say they are sedating him

  • @canadaclaret
    @canadaclaret Před 15 dny

    Not a big surprise that Scollins gave us the anaconda joke.
    Thanks, graphics for the wolf burger. The eyeballs look delicious.

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Před 15 dny +1

    Replacing Wally will deprive the world of Wally video conferencing lying down.

  • @lashendawest7509
    @lashendawest7509 Před 15 dny

    Good morning seth meyers fans

  • @RyanEglitis
    @RyanEglitis Před 15 dny

    The problem with the texas bill is that it ruquires everyone to validate, and the validation is a login with user data behind it. It totally removes anonymity.

  • @quecee
    @quecee Před 14 dny

    Sale of VPN subscription in TX: Up1,000%

  • @NeilCrouse99
    @NeilCrouse99 Před 15 dny

    Have to say, I prefer "no stash Wally" much better... LMO of course... : )

  • @thepadonthepondbythescum

    The Wally Hand...

  • @tomholroyd7519
    @tomholroyd7519 Před 15 dny

    McWolf ... with SWAN SAUCE

  • @jlighter1
    @jlighter1 Před 15 dny +1

    Possible correction: maybe it’s on a second card, but the card Wally was holding ended with “And that was a monologue.” No “we’re off and running” after. Just to be a pedantic jack-hole 😛

  • @ecamp6360
    @ecamp6360 Před 15 dny

    The line is 'python in my pants.'

  • @GrimJerr
    @GrimJerr Před 15 dny +1

    To my Republican Friend Rick G., who said I was F'n crazy if I thought Marijuana was going to be legalized in our life time, this J is for you buddy Spark up !

  • @betsysoutherland6069
    @betsysoutherland6069 Před 15 dny +3

    I can finally say that I have something in common with Trump. I too fall asleep throughout the day, it's something I can't control and it has had serious consequences. That said, I'm not running for president. Considering Trump's "doctor" reporting that Trump was in good health during his presidency, I think his drowsiness indicates otherwise.

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage Před 15 dny +4

    Looks like Seth's wearing two identical shirts at the same time again. Weirdo.

  • @TatsuDeMtz19
    @TatsuDeMtz19 Před 15 dny

    It's Seth Meyers

  • @rikiroos3100
    @rikiroos3100 Před 14 dny

    Correction: Bears don't hibernate - they enter a lighter sleep state called torpor.

  • @franciscocardenas5758
    @franciscocardenas5758 Před 15 dny +2

    That's one way narcissists catch up on their sleep. In this case it devalues the judge and the entire court as well. A true narcissist at heart. I wouldn't be at all surprised if that intense, focused stare was merely a mask to conceal the fact that he was zone out and asleep.

    • @Hunky_guy_very_sexy
      @Hunky_guy_very_sexy Před 15 dny

      This word that you used here on the internet reminded me of the other one, the onw that i don't know what it actually means.

    • @Hunky_guy_very_sexy
      @Hunky_guy_very_sexy Před 15 dny

      I mean the word dignity, have you ever heard of it?

    • @franciscocardenas5758
      @franciscocardenas5758 Před 15 dny

      @@Hunky_guy_very_sexy NO, word salad does not work on me. You failed, you lose, I win!

  • @emilyhartmann1794
    @emilyhartmann1794 Před 15 dny

    I have questions about Wally's cue cards lol
    "And the werd "werd".... wut

  • @godnoble
    @godnoble Před 10 dny

    I know there are a bunch of cameras in the studio, dedicated to angles like Seth closeup, guest closeup, Seth & guest both, Seth's desk, etc. Does Wally have his own dedicated camera?

  • @bluesdragon42
    @bluesdragon42 Před 15 dny

    Ask Sam Jackson about snakes 😂

  • @tuckerbowen4626
    @tuckerbowen4626 Před 15 dny

    missed opportunity to reference a certain Samuel L Jackson movie

  • @MrTomDangerous
    @MrTomDangerous Před 15 dny

    Give me restrunce.

  • @kevinfitzpatrick444
    @kevinfitzpatrick444 Před 15 dny

    Wally better not be getting paid for that laugh

  • @aishahaji-ali1599
    @aishahaji-ali1599 Před 15 dny +1

    I think Seth threatened Wally not to talk so he doesn’t pay him extra 🤔

    • @tubabelle
      @tubabelle Před 15 dny +1

      wally made a sound! I think that should count!

  • @daintycaked
    @daintycaked Před 15 dny +1

    Did wally get paid for audibly laughing?

  • @user-zs2di4kv9x
    @user-zs2di4kv9x Před 15 dny

    He can't sleep at night he keeps seeing the undertaker

  • @dannidunn9302
    @dannidunn9302 Před 15 dny

    Don Jr, Eric and MTG wait to go wolf hunting.

  • @Melesniannon
    @Melesniannon Před 15 dny +1

    Trump was fond of saying he only slept four to five hours per night, now we know that's just because he also sleeps 10 hours during the day.

  • @traceyholt8223
    @traceyholt8223 Před 15 dny

    I hope Wally got paid for his laugh!

  • @zcvxs
    @zcvxs Před 15 dny +1

    Trump couldnt get coked up before court ...

  • @markstevenson6635
    @markstevenson6635 Před 15 dny +1

    How does 🤡 stay vertical while asleep?

  • @bonobobaby
    @bonobobaby Před 15 dny +2

  • @tonycotto7106
    @tonycotto7106 Před 15 dny

    You can't do Wally like that