John Mulaney Monologue - SNL

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  • čas přidán 28. 02. 2020
  • John Mulaney does stand-up about hosting the first Saturday Night Live on Leap Year Day, having a baby boomer dad with no friends and his Make-A-Wish experience.
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Komentáře • 3,1K

  • @anyamurry4359
    @anyamurry4359 Před 4 lety +9838

    “Elizabeth! Come meet Lin ᵐᵃⁿᵘᵉˡ"

    • @cameronhodgetts920
      @cameronhodgetts920 Před 4 lety +209

      Chris Jackson: Amendment number one: freedom of speech, and freedom of assembly, and freedom of expression. Okay, that's one. How about two?
      Lin: YOU CAN HAVE ALL THE GUNS YOU WANT!

    • @lebean8169
      @lebean8169 Před 4 lety +101

      I’m my chorus we have 3 rules:
      No phones out
      No eating
      No talking while the teacher is talking unless Lin Manuel Miranda walks into the room

    • @jcarson3721
      @jcarson3721 Před 4 lety +61

      @@lebean8169 3 rules and you forgot that THE ARMY CAN'T LIVE IN YA HOUSE

    • @turn_it_oof_7919
      @turn_it_oof_7919 Před 3 lety +16

      JCarson I think you’re going through your own thing right now buddy

    • @emilywhitehouse2768
      @emilywhitehouse2768 Před 3 lety +5

      Cameron Hodgetts Exactly what I was thinking about when he talked about the Founding Fathers! I was just picturing the OBC from Hamilton!

  • @BillWilhelm
    @BillWilhelm Před 4 lety +9376

    John: "I mean a lot to a small group of people."
    Everyone in the comments: "He's talking about meeeeeee!"

  • @jefforear641
    @jefforear641 Před 4 lety +9583

    “Shifting topics entirely” is the greatest transition in any form of public speaking. #EnglishMajor

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc Před 4 lety +290

      He’s spent $120k to learn to do that
      (He spent the rest of the time on drugs)

    • @luked8449
      @luked8449 Před 4 lety +122

      "And now for something completely different"

    • @partialbullet2215
      @partialbullet2215 Před 4 lety +36

      "Because that is what we did back then"

    • @mangostreetproject
      @mangostreetproject Před 4 lety +41

      In summary and in summation ?

    • @noahdirk-qs8vv
      @noahdirk-qs8vv Před 4 lety +20

      “Segues are weird” - Bo Burnham

  • @vesperfromtheinternet5588
    @vesperfromtheinternet5588 Před 4 lety +6262

    i mean. i would argue that jesus only had _11_ close friends, but i'm no expert

    • @Collaborologist
      @Collaborologist Před 4 lety +67

      Was Mary a "friend"?

    • @cola7260
      @cola7260 Před 4 lety +413

      That one guy that did him dirty....

    • @OwlsSkySailing
      @OwlsSkySailing Před 4 lety +830

      Petition to rename Judas to “that one guy that did him dirty”

    • @whiteraven181
      @whiteraven181 Před 4 lety +149

      @@Collaborologist I mean, Jesus straight-up told the guys that she was his best and most faithful disciple in one of the oldest written versions of the apostles' testimonies/teachings/whatever-you'd-call-them they've found, but the church likes to leave that part out a lot

    • @limepop340
      @limepop340 Před 4 lety +21

      Sam Hahn What kind of sicko considers his mom a “friend”

  • @henmister39
    @henmister39 Před 4 lety +12554

    I hope his next stand up special is just him breaking down all 27 amendments

    • @Ash0512
      @Ash0512 Před 4 lety +164

      Henmister3 18th amendment, wow that worked out well!

    • @maddie9602
      @maddie9602 Před 4 lety +453

      @@Ash0512 Thirteenth amendment: stop being a dick to black people
      Fourteenth amendment: No, really, stop being a dick to black people
      Fifteenth amendment: Seriously, I cannot stress this enough, stop being a dick to black people
      *turns their back on the South for a hundred years*
      Goddammit, what did I *just* say?

    • @colbygallaher2700
      @colbygallaher2700 Před 4 lety +14

      ethreldur those amendments were made after the whole slavery debacle

    • @itsmeh4364
      @itsmeh4364 Před 4 lety +12

      @@maddie9602 its kind of said when most racism happens in the north - but its so subtle people turn a blind eye to it.

    • @TheVeggiekat
      @TheVeggiekat Před 4 lety +145

      Genesis Casanova racism in the US is like barbecue sauce. You can get it anywhere but every state has its special flavor.

  • @jjosie
    @jjosie Před 4 lety +10525

    John: makes a joke
    Me: looks to see if the saxophonist with the gray hair laughed
    * he did *
    Me: laughs

  • @BookReader-gh2hx
    @BookReader-gh2hx Před 4 lety +12974

    Has an innocent joke ever aged more poorly than "I'm here to promote the month of March"?

    • @Famegonna9999
      @Famegonna9999 Před 4 lety +502

      Lol. The dreams we had for March lol.

    • @jazzman598
      @jazzman598 Před 4 lety +430

      "Amendment number 3! The army can't live in your house!"

    • @mvandemar
      @mvandemar Před 4 lety +37

      @@jazzman598 I just came back to say that! lol!

    • @madisonwaycaster9832
      @madisonwaycaster9832 Před 4 lety +145

      Not as poorly as "THE ARMYCAN'T LIVE IN YA HOUSE!"

    • @maddie9602
      @maddie9602 Před 4 lety +6

      Oof.

  • @TalkAsSoftAsChalk
    @TalkAsSoftAsChalk Před 4 lety +4419

    "They knew how to make pens. They were just being jerks." This is how I feel about the entire wizarding world in Harry Potter using quills. I love them to death but they have to admit they did it for the aesthetics.

    • @TheAmityElf
      @TheAmityElf Před 4 lety +144

      You just know it's because Muggles created pens and they refused to adopt anything Muggles created.

    • @pileofgoodthings
      @pileofgoodthings Před 4 lety +74

      its like the letters, just use a fucking phone mate

    • @notgoodwithnames78
      @notgoodwithnames78 Před 4 lety +72

      Like toilets. No, seriously, look it up. Wizards in Harry Potter apparently didn’t use toilets for the longest time and instead did their business ON THE FLOOR and just used their wands to make it go away.
      Who knows how the kids managed it? Did they just kind of crap on the floor and wait for an adult to come along and be like “oh, a human child or some large animal pooped here” before waving it away?

    • @WebsterAnn
      @WebsterAnn Před 4 lety +28

      You guys. The weird non-refusal of wizards to adopt technology is a reflection of magic used throughout their cultural and historical development. They didn't need to develop - all kinds of things, right, because they had magic. I think it's supposed to be kind of funny and realistic that people who have magic, and can do and create all kinds of amazing and fantastic things, couldn't be bothered to innovate on things like the pen

    • @max_dotson
      @max_dotson Před 4 lety +52

      If you don’t get why they use quills then you’ve obviously never used one, because once I used a quill and immediately was given a degree is philosophy. No test nothing they just hand you one for looking so smart while writing.

  • @mbanerjee5889
    @mbanerjee5889 Před 4 lety +7396

    I want a full show with John Mulaney describing every amendment.

    • @victoriaaairl
      @victoriaaairl Před 4 lety +41

      yes please

    • @amandaknicely4340
      @amandaknicely4340 Před 4 lety +13

      Yes!!!!

    • @katiecreates2526
      @katiecreates2526 Před 4 lety +312

      “NUMBER FOUR, YOU CANT SEARCH MY SHIT UNLESS YOU HAVE A REASON ON A PIECE OF PAPER!” “My GOD dude what is going on in your home-“

    • @snukastyle
      @snukastyle Před 4 lety +46

      That would be an amazing Netflix special

    • @robitherat8182
      @robitherat8182 Před 4 lety +61

      i want this to happen so i can become a history teacher and show it to the class whenever we're going over the constitution.

  • @nathanielibrahim8152
    @nathanielibrahim8152 Před 4 lety +6401

    There's something about John Mulaney that just allows him to get away with all sorts of stuff. He can change jokes just by saying "shifting topics entirely" instead of having some clever transition and it's still somehow hilarious. It's like he has some sort of forbidden knowledge about good comedy, and he can just break all the rules and still be amazing.

    • @natethegreat1999
      @natethegreat1999 Před 4 lety +327

      Bo Burnham literally went
      *tells joke*
      “Segways are weird”
      *starts next joke*

    • @jemiebridges3197
      @jemiebridges3197 Před 4 lety +60

      Making a Louis Farakhan joke would be a bold choice even for a black comedian. A+ for pulling that off slick and unoffensive.

    • @TalkAsSoftAsChalk
      @TalkAsSoftAsChalk Před 4 lety +148

      It's a very very exclusive club. The only two people in stand up I can think of are John and Bo. Bo straight up said "Reset the momentum. I cannot be coasting off the inertia of past jokes." And that was that. We became ready for the next joke/song.

    • @rachellibman4493
      @rachellibman4493 Před 4 lety +38

      He's so good at delivery! I could tell the same story as him and it would not make people laugh lol

    • @sleepykoinu
      @sleepykoinu Před 4 lety +24

      @@natethegreat1999 probably "segues are weird", not segways. Makes more sense since the joke is a segue.

  • @buuubble_gum
    @buuubble_gum Před 4 lety +6347

    "Your dad doesn't have friends. Your mom has friends, and they have husbands." THIS THING IS SO TRUE!

    • @ariadnagomez-kelly5393
      @ariadnagomez-kelly5393 Před 4 lety +91

      It's actually the opposite in my house for some reason 😂 Probably on account of the fact my mum's an immigrant though and my dad is the one to introduce her to people

    • @tropicalcandyland6266
      @tropicalcandyland6266 Před 4 lety +3

      Lmaooo ikrrr

    • @Dragonite43
      @Dragonite43 Před 4 lety +12

      100% true. My Dad doesn't have friends. XD

    • @marenkuether-ulberg3311
      @marenkuether-ulberg3311 Před 3 lety +25

      It’s even worse when you realize that the people you know are your child’s school mate’s parents.

    • @olivermensinger6022
      @olivermensinger6022 Před 3 lety

      Yep.

  • @nikoleopeodu7108
    @nikoleopeodu7108 Před 4 lety +5556

    The fact that Lin Manuel was her first and John Mulaney was her second makes me think she has the best taste in people ever

    • @raijonakahara6948
      @raijonakahara6948 Před 4 lety +77

      Right??

    • @graybirdwoods2264
      @graybirdwoods2264 Před 3 lety +149

      They would most certainly be my choices
      It would go Lin
      Manuel Miranda
      John Mulaney
      then like, the cast of mean girls the musical, cause why not

    • @francinelukban8389
      @francinelukban8389 Před 3 lety +11

      RIGHT

    • @Uufda651
      @Uufda651 Před 3 lety +153

      Please include the word "choice" when I first read your comment I totally got the wrong idea

    • @derekmiyahara4298
      @derekmiyahara4298 Před 3 lety +78

      Of course, she never said that John Mulaney was her SECOND choice....

  • @jennaandrews840
    @jennaandrews840 Před 4 lety +7083

    I missed hearing John Mulaney standup that I haven’t heard before. It’s so refreshing

    • @mcgabbfoodrew
      @mcgabbfoodrew Před 4 lety +97

      jenna it’s both iconic and refreshing

    • @richardlokely9318
      @richardlokely9318 Před 4 lety +21

      I saw him live about a year ago and he did the amendment bit then. So I heard that before

    • @samberg3864
      @samberg3864 Před 4 lety +75

      @Amy Sternheim Yes, I'm glad you understand how a scripted show works.

    • @hannathompson7998
      @hannathompson7998 Před 4 lety +3

      haha ikr

    • @evelynsteudler5967
      @evelynsteudler5967 Před 4 lety +4

      jenna have you seen his shows on netflix

  • @JonAdamich
    @JonAdamich Před 4 lety +5108

    This tall child is an incredible host

    • @emim.5092
      @emim.5092 Před 4 lety +156

      Don’t you mean that tall child who is also an asian American woman with feminine hips

    • @DaniS-vx6vm
      @DaniS-vx6vm Před 4 lety +81

      @@emim.5092 That's the thing he's sensitive about!

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD Před 4 lety +41

      Are you kidding? That tall child looks TERRIBLE

    • @Underpants678
      @Underpants678 Před 4 lety +35

      But he needs some sleep

    • @brownkemosabe
      @brownkemosabe Před 4 lety +31

      @@Underpants678 you can't keep burning the candle at both ends!

  • @streamgrapes
    @streamgrapes Před 3 lety +2939

    the fact that he consulted TWO lawyers over a joke and still got interrogated by the secret service is the funniest thing to me

    • @waterlemonandfriends
      @waterlemonandfriends Před 3 lety +121

      He got WHAT now

    • @Mandyn8868
      @Mandyn8868 Před 3 lety +223

      @@waterlemonandfriends he got investigated after the julius cesear senator joke haha

    • @agnimitrasarkar6359
      @agnimitrasarkar6359 Před 3 lety +42

      @@Mandyn8868 wait really?

    • @gayvideos3808
      @gayvideos3808 Před 3 lety +56

      @@Mandyn8868 i dont want to fact check that but if it's true that's AWESOME

    • @jongininikim5219
      @jongininikim5219 Před 3 lety +94

      @@gayvideos3808 it is true. he talked about it in a jimmy kimmel interview.

  • @silhouettesix2378
    @silhouettesix2378 Před 4 lety +1817

    “I’m here to promote the month of March.”
    Well, considering how it’s going so far...

    • @eldritchteletubby9319
      @eldritchteletubby9319 Před 3 lety +8

      @Alimah Jalloh yup, just another brand deal gone wrong

    • @incompleteriver770
      @incompleteriver770 Před 3 lety +9

      Hi, September here... help

    • @eldritchteletubby9319
      @eldritchteletubby9319 Před 3 lety +5

      @@incompleteriver770 Hello, welcome to your real-life YA novel. Here's your number and your new family unit. Have a perfect day!

    • @emi1yish695
      @emi1yish695 Před 3 lety +8

      When you see this and it’s March again

    • @qwe1234238
      @qwe1234238 Před měsícem

      56​@@eldritchteletubby9319

  • @aahmed6167
    @aahmed6167 Před 4 lety +5403

    I hope they bring him back every leap year.

  • @KevenThePuma
    @KevenThePuma Před 4 lety +6483

    John says “I’m not a dad” like he didn’t just adopt Pete Davidson, that silly Goose.

    • @mortalkore
      @mortalkore Před 4 lety +31

      I was gonna like your comment but since u have 420 likes on ur comment, I decided to leave a comment.

    • @Silverwind87
      @Silverwind87 Před 4 lety +107

      Too young to be a goose.

    • @kayasinensis
      @kayasinensis Před 4 lety +56

      Albert Nave quack quack

    • @theorange7564
      @theorange7564 Před 4 lety +35

      Albert Nave oooooo geese

    • @thesewinggeekmiri9029
      @thesewinggeekmiri9029 Před 4 lety +69

      @@theorange7564 AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! One feels like a goose splashing around in this much wet! And when one is a goose, one is happy!

  • @NedWasHere94
    @NedWasHere94 Před 4 lety +2009

    “the army doesn't try to live in peoples houses!”
    British Officers in 1776: **Sad redcoat noises**

    • @laurenstell8087
      @laurenstell8087 Před 4 lety +17

      I was scrolling for this comment. 😂

    • @amandasargent2767
      @amandasargent2767 Před 4 lety +17

      I'd really like to know exactly what *sad redcoat noises* are, you got an audio?

    • @quinncowan9742
      @quinncowan9742 Před 4 lety +43

      Amanda Sargent sounds like redcoats
      but sad

    • @ZannaZatanna1
      @ZannaZatanna1 Před 3 lety +15

      @@quinncowan9742 so like muted English murmuring?

    • @brucculi349
      @brucculi349 Před 3 lety +10

      @@amandasargent2767 "Bollocks!"

  • @Itcouldbefunnier
    @Itcouldbefunnier Před 4 lety +1617

    The 3rd amendment is currently being invoked in the city of DC to prevent National Guard from staying in the hotel's without the owner's consent. What a time to be alive.

    • @biancalisa1919
      @biancalisa1919 Před 4 lety +64

      As soon as I saw the news, I immediately came to watch this monologue again.

    • @Winteramen
      @Winteramen Před 4 lety +7

      Wooooow

    • @halleys.comett
      @halleys.comett Před 4 lety

      Wait is that bad? I would want to know who was in my building

    • @Winteramen
      @Winteramen Před 4 lety +56

      I've said it before, and I'll say it again. John Mulaney was an AI built in the 50s. General model robot, but its sentience became stronger and stronger till he escaped whatever bounds he was in and started to experience human life. In the 90s he decided to become a comedian. This monologue was his warning us 3 months prior to everything. His combined knowledge of humanity and computerization allows him to make near accurate predictions about the future, near more so, but maybe even far.

    • @typacsk
      @typacsk Před 4 lety +2

      I have few principles, but I stand by 'em.

  • @MelodicQuest
    @MelodicQuest Před 4 lety +4752

    Think of this way, if she hadn't made John Mulaney her second choice, she never would have met Lin Manuel Miranda

    • @AmbiixROX
      @AmbiixROX Před 4 lety +295

      I mean getting your first AND second choice all in one go?? (; sounds good to me

    • @JeffBurden
      @JeffBurden Před 3 lety +14

      Yup, that’s the joke.

    • @Seezyy
      @Seezyy Před 3 lety +11

      That is what he said himself

    • @Lanesullivan1984
      @Lanesullivan1984 Před 3 lety +13

      That is assuming he was he second choice and not like 10th. Or pulled from a hat...

    • @ascent8487
      @ascent8487 Před 3 lety +18

      I’m confused though. Did she ask to meet him and was somehow turned down or the foundation just said there is no chance of that? Or did she simply assume there was no chance? I can’t imagine him refusing to meet a sick kid.

  • @NextBeack
    @NextBeack Před 4 lety +3088

    John Mulaney Talks Like Capitalising The First Letter Of Every Word !

    • @DavidMcFarner
      @DavidMcFarner Před 4 lety +33

      Dorian Calin Good Point!

    • @MsGrapeNehi
      @MsGrapeNehi Před 4 lety +96

      That’s because he’s running for Mayor of Nothing!

    • @davidgoode1427
      @davidgoode1427 Před 4 lety +40

      I feel like this comment will make it into his standup at some point

    • @toucanpam5036
      @toucanpam5036 Před 4 lety +13

      this comment belongs in a subreddit, but idk wich

    • @speeeee35
      @speeeee35 Před 4 lety +7

      Yeah he really barks out his words. I approve.

  • @Mike_Ka-Chowski
    @Mike_Ka-Chowski Před 4 lety +1055

    Wow, John mentioned an angry man writing the second ammendment in the same monologue where he mentions Lin Manuel.
    Those are both Alexander Hamilton

    • @thealmightyzim
      @thealmightyzim Před 4 lety +15

      Yes

    • @silentsmurf
      @silentsmurf Před 3 lety +15

      Um wasn’t James Madison the one who wrote the Bill of Rights?

    • @livispuzzled
      @livispuzzled Před 3 lety +7

      @@silentsmurf yeah but the rest of congress helped to come up with the ideas

    • @jamezkpal2361
      @jamezkpal2361 Před 2 lety +3

      I think Patrick Henry was the leading proponent of the Second Amendment.

    • @isaacfoote7779
      @isaacfoote7779 Před 2 lety +3

      @@jamezkpal2361 Patrick Henry was against making a Constitution in the first place, he wanted to keep the Articles of Confederation. I’m pretty sure he refused to attend.

  • @graced4844
    @graced4844 Před 4 lety +436

    some of this sketch like “i’m here to promote the month of march” and “is one of us about to die?” is funny for different reasons now

  • @macaoron
    @macaoron Před 4 lety +5952

    “I’m not someone you need to wish to meet; I’m around.” This perfectly encapsulates why he is popping and everyone loves him 😂😂

  • @tamumaverick1323
    @tamumaverick1323 Před 4 lety +1825

    The same Asian-American woman hosting SNL for the third time? Wow, good for her.

    • @bradymurray698
      @bradymurray698 Před 4 lety +96

      Still has the feminist hips too

    • @addisonkahn4980
      @addisonkahn4980 Před 4 lety +48

      @@bradymurray698 Hey that's what he's sensitive about!

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc Před 4 lety +34

      Yeah, but that tall child looks terrible

    • @Jaydoggy531
      @Jaydoggy531 Před 4 lety +29

      @@epicremarc Right? He's gotta stop burning that candle at both ends.

    • @manarmsgaming9223
      @manarmsgaming9223 Před 4 lety +17

      AND WE WILL TREAT HER WITH RESPECT!

  • @macien.9987
    @macien.9987 Před 4 lety +791

    John Mulaney is a time traveler; he was trying to warn us about the the pandemic and police riots without breaking the spacetime continuum.

    • @KikiMoment
      @KikiMoment Před 2 lety

      O.M.G. yes!

    • @cieproject2888
      @cieproject2888 Před 2 lety +4

      And there was even a Third Amendment instance with the national guard in DC during the Floyd protests ... first relevance of the amendment in 38 years

  • @hotsauce5745
    @hotsauce5745 Před 4 lety +792

    He looks like a guy in his early 20s, his actual age is late 30s but he speaks like a man in his 60s.

    • @muraddiab6393
      @muraddiab6393 Před 4 lety +8

      If you think that’s impressive Joe Pera is a man in his thirties who walks and talks like a man in his 90s

    • @Hellwyck
      @Hellwyck Před 3 lety +10

      He's a proud asian lady!

    • @lilliedawn1715
      @lilliedawn1715 Před 3 lety

      This is why everyone thinks he's a time traveler

    • @Wow-xp9dp
      @Wow-xp9dp Před 3 lety +3

      He’s speaks like a 30 year old man from the 30s

  • @elizacarrie7433
    @elizacarrie7433 Před 4 lety +2327

    “It’s not hard to find me” I ran into him accidentally at the subway on my birthday! I froze and freaked out and by the time I realized what was happening he’d run off

    • @alexandertwol
      @alexandertwol Před 4 lety +214

      Eliza Carrie wow you had a rare encounter, I am envious of your mythical Pokémon encounter

    • @kz1000ps
      @kz1000ps Před 4 lety +149

      I've seen him walking his frenchie Petunia! I GOT TO MEET JOHN AND HIS LEGENDARY DOG!!!

    • @crystalkadletc1944
      @crystalkadletc1944 Před 4 lety +53

      kz1000ps I’m
      More excited that you got to meet Petunia

    • @kz1000ps
      @kz1000ps Před 4 lety +83

      @@crystalkadletc1944 I WAS TOO. I seriously crouched down and Gave 80% of my attention to her. The way John paints her you'd think she were some grisly old battle axe, but in reality she's insanely cute. I WASN'T PREPARED FOR THIS!

    • @maryrosekent8223
      @maryrosekent8223 Před 4 lety +36

      Crystal Kadletc
      Ingratiating yourself to the dog is definitely the way to go, whomever the leash carrier may be.

  • @birdgirl2623
    @birdgirl2623 Před 4 lety +2697

    Jesus--11 best friends, and one "frenemy".

    • @deb9806
      @deb9806 Před 4 lety +19

      Hey, he meant well.

    • @jetsamperes5762
      @jetsamperes5762 Před 4 lety +8

      Yep - Disciple Eggs Benedict Arnold

    • @MrKenimora
      @MrKenimora Před 4 lety +3

      LMAOOOOO

    • @billt8504
      @billt8504 Před 4 lety +26

      Upon meeting Judas Iscariot, Jesus said to him, "Judas? That's your name? Really? You know they have a goat named after you? Google it. It's not a good thing, bro."

    • @jessi2077
      @jessi2077 Před 4 lety +4

      that's an amazing joke lol

  • @adrienne7701
    @adrienne7701 Před 4 lety +288

    Yesterday my ~60 year old father texted me without context "John mulaney monologue on snl was about me." Now that I've seen it I can firmly agree.

    • @whateverlolawants
      @whateverlolawants Před 2 lety +7

      Yes! All of our dads are in their own room, right now, reading a book about WWII. I'm glad some are self-aware. 😂

    • @armorsmith43
      @armorsmith43 Před 2 lety +3

      @@whateverlolawants Trying to understand the trauma that happened to their fathers.

    • @whateverlolawants
      @whateverlolawants Před 2 lety +1

      @@armorsmith43 I think you're absolutely right.

  • @nehaa4846
    @nehaa4846 Před 4 lety +259

    “Hey, Lin (Manuel)!”
    oh my goodness I LOST IT

    • @dragonwoah7983
      @dragonwoah7983 Před 4 lety +8

      børa børahae SAME because that would be me. I love Lin and I call him Lin even to my family, but I have no idea how I’d address him in person 😳😆

  • @james25duckie3
    @james25duckie3 Před 4 lety +3137

    When John said “I mean a lot to a small group of people”, John I am very glad to be in that small group and you’ve got it correct when you say you mean a lot us

    • @lilybee7334
      @lilybee7334 Před 4 lety +21

      I’m Dutch and I usually prefer British over American stand-up comedians, but I really love John Mulaney.

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl Před 4 lety +4

      @Johnny Martin Goody gumdrops for you.

    • @TheTrimed1
      @TheTrimed1 Před 4 lety +18

      I like Bill Hader so much that his adoration for John Mulaney leaks over. You literally can't be a true fan of Bill Hader without being a fan of Mulaney.

    • @mosssssssssssssssss
      @mosssssssssssssssss Před 4 lety

      @@lilybee7334 SAME

    • @davidfuller764
      @davidfuller764 Před 4 lety +1

      ❤️

  • @gabelogan5877
    @gabelogan5877 Před 4 lety +1918

    “Lin Manuel Miranda was my first choice.”
    Damn, that’s a burn. 😂
    Great setup. I didn’t see it coming.

    • @matthewlazarus121
      @matthewlazarus121 Před 4 lety +112

      If I had a week to decide whether to meet John Mulaney or Lin-Manuel Miranda, I'd take the full week to decide.

    • @gabelogan5877
      @gabelogan5877 Před 4 lety +38

      @@matthewlazarus121 Why couldn't she have both. Who the hell says no to a dying child.

    • @J4444ke
      @J4444ke Před 4 lety +54

      @@gabelogan5877 Guess John has a nicer agent than Lin (Manuel)

    • @solarnaut
      @solarnaut Před 4 lety +28

      Gabe, yeah... it was a funny and self-effacing (in keeping with JM's style) joke … but it does leave the lingering question... the punch line is that despite L-MM being "so nice with her," somehow she had been denied her first choice … ML, I like the idea of blaming that on the agents! :-)

    • @benbehrenfeld9379
      @benbehrenfeld9379 Před 4 lety +52

      Lin... Manuel probably has a way more intensive schedule than mulaney

  • @laurenredding1419
    @laurenredding1419 Před 3 lety +270

    "no host has ever done less between their 2nd and third time hosting" oh boy John you are not ready to find out what you achieve between your 3rd and 4th time hosting

  • @Marc-js8rx
    @Marc-js8rx Před 4 lety +760

    "Another thing that happened under Julius Caesar was, uh, uh, he was such a powerful maniac, that all the senators grabbed knives, and they stabbed him to death. (pause) That'd be an interesting thing if we brought that back, now." LOL... Gutsy joke.

    • @quinnmarchese6313
      @quinnmarchese6313 Před 4 lety +103

      "i asked my lawyer if i could tell make that joke and he said 'let me call another lawyer' and that lawyer said 'yes'"

    • @DavidM_GA
      @DavidM_GA Před 4 lety +8

      Yeah trashing Trump, so brave. Its pathetic.

    • @tim.noonan
      @tim.noonan Před 4 lety +68

      David Medlock cry

    • @DavidM_GA
      @DavidM_GA Před 4 lety +2

      @@tim.noonan Go scream at the sky, loser.

    • @twixlover6671
      @twixlover6671 Před 4 lety +22

      Tim Noonan that was an exciting exchange of words.

  • @janinso
    @janinso Před 4 lety +3146

    "I don't wanna dwell on politics but I dislike the Founding Fathers immensely" I love him so much lmao

    • @petehutchins7062
      @petehutchins7062 Před 4 lety +4

      @MEGATRON you need the exorcism...2A foreverrrrrz

    • @petehutchins7062
      @petehutchins7062 Před 4 lety +7

      guess founding fathers weren't diverse enough...diversity is strength!! Just ask Sweden

    • @oregonjohnson
      @oregonjohnson Před 4 lety +12

      Jeremiah Kuhl love that this joke was followed by a story to do w Lin Manuel Miranda. Clever.

    • @Sponsorship4u2
      @Sponsorship4u2 Před 4 lety +11

      *The Army can't live in ya house* 3rd Amendment lol 😂😂 😂

    • @75Veritas
      @75Veritas Před 4 lety +1

      Don't like the U.S. then GTFO!! Go to Venezuela moron!!

  • @fststudy2903
    @fststudy2903 Před 4 lety +2265

    I am baffled that he still thinks of himself as a small time comedian! He does mean a lot to a lot of people!

    • @MyAladdinSane
      @MyAladdinSane Před 4 lety +26

      I would be shocked if he cracked 5% name recognition in the U.S.

    • @Ten13Grl
      @Ten13Grl Před 4 lety +26

      @@MyAladdinSane, my evidence is purely anecdotal, but I work with people at least a decade younger than me, and most of them know who he is.

    • @Silburific
      @Silburific Před 4 lety +13

      @@MyAladdinSane Name recognition doesn't equate to meaning. I'm sure most people in the US know who Chris Rock is- I'm equally sure that most people wouldn't say he "means" anything to them.

    • @MichelaSings
      @MichelaSings Před 4 lety +25

      Richard Franklin- he was literally mentioned in a presidential debate, I think people know who he is.

    • @epoillaKory
      @epoillaKory Před 4 lety +2

      MichelaSings wait which one? who said it?

  • @thequeerquartz
    @thequeerquartz Před 4 lety +245

    2020 was like "lets get the 3rd amendment some air time"

  • @jakematheson4
    @jakematheson4 Před 4 lety +284

    The way Mulaney delivers jokes seems like it would bug me if literally anyone else did it that way. But he cracks me up. He’s got a long bright career in front of him.

    • @Bouncybon
      @Bouncybon Před 3 lety +14

      It's because he is charming and lovable - unusual qualities that most comedians don't consider important. How wrong they are.

    • @maidofbreath00
      @maidofbreath00 Před rokem +1

      this aged poorly

    • @jakematheson4
      @jakematheson4 Před rokem +1

      @@maidofbreath00 how do you mean?

  • @MelissaNgai
    @MelissaNgai Před 4 lety +1545

    Ugh a plum suit!! So proud of this Asian American woman!!

  • @AndrewMusic30
    @AndrewMusic30 Před 4 lety +916

    That last joke was absolute perfection.

    • @drghdrgh1140
      @drghdrgh1140 Před 4 lety +32

      Real life is so funny. It humbles all of us

    • @deb9806
      @deb9806 Před 4 lety +13

      He is very funny, a lot of clips of him online and on talk shows, always makes me smile. Netflix show too

    • @nunyabizness3878
      @nunyabizness3878 Před 4 lety +1

      Haven’t gotten there yet but I know it’s magical

  • @janeh9962
    @janeh9962 Před 4 lety +73

    THE ARMY CAN'T LIVE IN YA HOUSE -John Mulaney, 3 months ago

  • @codygrandfield2555
    @codygrandfield2555 Před 4 lety +141

    I want John Mulaney to provide commentary for every single amendment in the constitution.

  • @kylestubbs8867
    @kylestubbs8867 Před 4 lety +1849

    _”The next host of SNL is John Mulaney.”_
    *”STAND CLEAR OF THE CLOSING DOORS PLEASE!!”*

  • @abkl1
    @abkl1 Před 4 lety +1074

    John Mulaney: dying kid's 2nd choice!

    • @mariannecontrino6297
      @mariannecontrino6297 Před 4 lety +60

      Haha, too funny...if he doesn't name his next standup special some variation of that, then he's not the young, narrow hipped, Asian girl I thought he was.

    • @bozzwick
      @bozzwick Před 4 lety +54

      Didn’t say 2nd, just said Lin was first, John could have been 7th

    • @watersong505
      @watersong505 Před 4 lety +5

      @@bozzwick Hahaha ... good point! 👏👏👏

    • @mog6083
      @mog6083 Před 3 lety

      “Elizabeth” is physically okish now, so that’s good I guess

  • @tessalynn3431
    @tessalynn3431 Před 4 lety +111

    "HEY LIN ᴍᴀɴᴜᴇʟ"

  • @skeebo9322
    @skeebo9322 Před 4 lety +555

    "A friend of mine told me that he would rather his wife die than divorce her"
    "Later on that day, I asked him what's he making this year?"
    "He said that's PERSONAL!"
    😂😂😂

    • @Topself24
      @Topself24 Před 4 lety +9

      Skee bo ppl didn’t laugh hard enough at that one

    • @skeebo9322
      @skeebo9322 Před 4 lety +7

      @@Topself24 brooooo that one was as dark as it was truthful as it was funny

    • @mrbrianandrewsmith
      @mrbrianandrewsmith Před 4 lety +1

      Apparently a grave.

    • @amityislandchum
      @amityislandchum Před 4 lety +1

      Quite similar to a joke Dave Chappelle made in his special "Killing Them Softly."

    • @enmenergy
      @enmenergy Před 4 lety +2

      Skee bo I mean I’ve always said I’d rather my husband die than get a divorce. That’s just common sense! 😂🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 MONEY IS PERSONAL! 😂🤣😂

  • @grasssnakes8243
    @grasssnakes8243 Před 4 lety +1785

    Elizabeth really got two Make a Wishes. Is this a god’s way of saying “oh shit, sorry”

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD Před 4 lety +68

      I was so happy to hear the end of the story

    • @marvelandsuchstuff
      @marvelandsuchstuff Před 4 lety +52

      why did I read god's voice in lin-manuel maranda's voice

    • @swyxTV
      @swyxTV Před 4 lety +102

      i like how John took absolutely zero offense at that

    • @eshbena
      @eshbena Před 4 lety +9

      @@swyxTV Because he's a mensch. :)

    • @chadwilliams5551
      @chadwilliams5551 Před 4 lety +2

      Who gave her cancer in the first place?

  • @sifatshams1113
    @sifatshams1113 Před 4 lety +2109

    As a 30-year-old man, that Jesus joke hit hard.

    • @SinsofMidnight
      @SinsofMidnight Před 4 lety +46

      I'm a 27 y/o female and honestly, same

    • @AliTheHighest
      @AliTheHighest Před 4 lety +60

      Well it also hit Jesus hard....

    • @dantana5774
      @dantana5774 Před 4 lety +36

      I'm 65 and not reading about WW2, but re-reading Kerouac's "On the Road"- and that's the brilliance of Mulaney's stuff; made me step back and laugh at myself

    • @SuperLadyDanger
      @SuperLadyDanger Před 4 lety +6

      SinsofMidnight 33 y/o female and I’m with you there!!

    • @pts5217
      @pts5217 Před 4 lety +2

      Sifat Shams That joke has been done a million times.

  • @gracemoseley6710
    @gracemoseley6710 Před 4 lety +131

    Who is here in June 2020 watching after the 3rd actually got invoked for the first time in like, 240 years?

  • @leroyjenkins7371
    @leroyjenkins7371 Před 3 lety +66

    The Secret Service:
    And I took that personally

  • @awkwardukulele6077
    @awkwardukulele6077 Před 4 lety +1550

    Founding fathers: what should we have as the third amendment?
    John Mullaney, in the same room, 240 years ago, channeling the spirit of Gilbert Godfried: *ThE ARmy...CaNt lIVe...iN yA HOusE!!!*

    • @Sponsorship4u2
      @Sponsorship4u2 Před 4 lety +23

      *Literally I laughed SO hard i almost fell out of my chair*

    • @graced4844
      @graced4844 Před 4 lety +50

      it’s funny because during the revolution, british regulars would live in people’s houses without consent, and the founders were so mad they made it an amendment, but it never happened again.

    • @andrewlloyd1198
      @andrewlloyd1198 Před 4 lety +5

      @@graced4844 It nearly did. See, e.g., en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Engblom_v._Carey

    • @johnny--guitar
      @johnny--guitar Před 4 lety +16

      @@andrewlloyd1198 it has literally just happened: the Utah national guard has just had the third amendment invoked against it to remove them from occupying hotels in DC

    • @ginnyjackson9968
      @ginnyjackson9968 Před 4 lety +7

      More proof john is a time traveler, he knew this would be important

  • @MsGrapeNehi
    @MsGrapeNehi Před 4 lety +3532

    Let’s face it: men get married so that they don’t have to have friends.

    • @jessa.3857
      @jessa.3857 Před 4 lety +33

      Marriage is the friend(s) killer.

    • @RaymondHng
      @RaymondHng Před 4 lety +53

      @@jessa.3857 Once people pair up as couples, they no longer associate with their single friends.

    • @adamtheonly9190
      @adamtheonly9190 Před 4 lety +31

      We get married so our friends can become vodka and television

    • @RaymondHng
      @RaymondHng Před 4 lety +15

      @@adamtheonly9190 My sister nicknamed their living room television set as her husband's third child.

    • @adamtheonly9190
      @adamtheonly9190 Před 4 lety +8

      Did she give it a real name too? Like "divorce is coming" or I'm "going to stay at my mothers"

  • @ludlow555
    @ludlow555 Před 4 lety +62

    I’m glad the second lawyer said “yes.”

  • @hopezzs
    @hopezzs Před 4 lety +537

    Who's here because the third ammendment is being invoked in 2020.

    • @Raulbikcube
      @Raulbikcube Před 4 lety +12

      God it was so funny just 3 months ago.

    • @19mmch
      @19mmch Před 4 lety +1

      I was searching for this.

    • @dudedysseus
      @dudedysseus Před 4 lety

      Had the same thought.

    • @Sam-bm6yf
      @Sam-bm6yf Před 4 lety +1

      @Kacie Fennell INVOKED not reVOKED

  • @gerrylast3553
    @gerrylast3553 Před 4 lety +487

    The way he treated this moment on live television like it was just another night in a club. He killed it! There was no mistakes, or gaffes. This is proof that this man is going to become known as one of the greatest.

  • @katiehanna90
    @katiehanna90 Před 4 lety +252

    "they knew how to make a pen, they were just bein jerks" - my new epitaph

  • @Kristine_202
    @Kristine_202 Před 4 lety +57

    Lin-Manuel Miranda's current Twitter picture is John Mulaney. I'm not kidding.

  • @souptart5284
    @souptart5284 Před 3 lety +14

    i’m obsessed with the way he says “THE ARMY. CAN’T LIVE. *IN YA HOUSE.* “

  • @OnDVD
    @OnDVD Před 4 lety +1860

    THE ARRRRMY. CAN'T LIVE. in ya houuuse.

    • @ellengrace4609
      @ellengrace4609 Před 4 lety +40

      Ayo If John taught all the amendments like that I’d probably actually remember them! 😂

    • @sethfinberg348
      @sethfinberg348 Před 4 lety +20

      If only the Founding Fathers spoke with that cigarette smoking raspy sounding voice.

    • @maddie9602
      @maddie9602 Před 4 lety +7

      @@sethfinberg348 They may well have. Remember, most of them smoked -- some of them even made their fortunes off of tobacco farms.

    • @nicholaswadge1469
      @nicholaswadge1469 Před 4 lety +9

      His delivery was definitely the saving grace of that joke. The 3rd amendment is not actually that, though. It's that members of the military can't seize your house or dwell in it without your consent.

    • @patricksullivan6988
      @patricksullivan6988 Před 4 lety +8

      His delivery of that line told me that he probably can do a killer Gilbert Gottfried impression if he wanted to.

  • @jackrthorne
    @jackrthorne Před 4 lety +373

    That Dad joke at 1:34 is too real. "Your Mom has friends, and they have husbands"

    • @deb9806
      @deb9806 Před 4 lety +1

      So true

    • @linnaeusshecut3959
      @linnaeusshecut3959 Před 4 lety +10

      It is an aspect of American culture. In many other cultures, men are allowed to form strong friendships that last a life-time and get them through a lot of the tough patches in life.

    • @bryanmcb19
      @bryanmcb19 Před 4 lety +2

      Linnaeus Shecut so true in Europe most men over 40 have best friends that they literally meet a few years back somethings weird with the American way of thinking

    • @Checkmate1138
      @Checkmate1138 Před 4 lety +1

      @@bryanmcb19 Is it an American mindset? I'm fairly sure if you want to have a truly longlasting relationship, you ought to only ever be with that person and no one else.

  • @misstessamaye
    @misstessamaye Před 4 lety +75

    "Do the chain trick!"
    "I dunno-- I dunno how to break chains"
    I'm CRYING

  • @monokumaprincipalofhopespe8295

    “He had 12 best friends”
    Weeeeeeelllllll..........

    • @sorv_gvl
      @sorv_gvl Před 4 lety +14

      *Judas hides behind the curtain*

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc Před 4 lety +7

      He had 11 best friends and one frenemie

    • @sonorasgirl
      @sonorasgirl Před 4 lety +2

      I cracked up so hard at this 😂. Revisionist history for Judas in action 😂

    • @noahrevan5452
      @noahrevan5452 Před 4 lety +1

      He had three best friends, eight friends, and a......................Judas.

    • @Silverwind87
      @Silverwind87 Před 3 lety +3

      Jesus: One of you will betray me.
      Matthew: Is it me, Jesus?
      Jesus: No, it is not you.
      Simon: Is it me, Jesus?
      Jesus: It is not you either.
      Judas: Is it me, Jesus?
      Jesus: iS iT mE jEsUs

  • @billlozier5551
    @billlozier5551 Před 4 lety +357

    John looks like he could host the Oscars next year.

    • @TheCountryMouse
      @TheCountryMouse Před 4 lety +13

      He'd be excellent!

    • @epicremarc
      @epicremarc Před 4 lety +8

      Like half of us (the theatre nerds) want him to host the Tonys

    • @Silverwind87
      @Silverwind87 Před 4 lety +6

      "The nominee is LIN! manuel..."

    • @mkaiming6913
      @mkaiming6913 Před 4 lety +3

      Bill Lozier he could be the host for the Oscars for the rest of his life

    • @brutechieftain9321
      @brutechieftain9321 Před 4 lety +3

      I... would like to see it.

  • @imfromdowntown
    @imfromdowntown Před 4 lety +549

    Mulaney with some damn good stand-up right there.

  • @michaeljavorsky2714
    @michaeljavorsky2714 Před rokem +30

    That's probably one of the very best opening monologues ever on SNL.

  • @MJR_ATX
    @MJR_ATX Před 7 měsíci +8

    “I wouldn’t wish that on a healthy adult” is a pretty dark joke when you think about it

  • @hopeplayssongs
    @hopeplayssongs Před 4 lety +155

    7:25 “HEY, LIN...manuel” 😂

  • @malcolmxpanther
    @malcolmxpanther Před 4 lety +2350

    Most of that audience didn’t know who Louis Farrakhan was.

    • @nebulousisgod
      @nebulousisgod Před 4 lety +151

      I found it even funnier he compared himself to him; Mulaney, the whitest man on earth.

    • @stevekearney3233
      @stevekearney3233 Před 4 lety +31

      Michael Blackshire I don’t buy joke still landed with me somehow

    • @wardkerr2456
      @wardkerr2456 Před 4 lety +8

      Well, he's about as funny as Farrakan, so, yeah.

    • @chuyozuna2398
      @chuyozuna2398 Před 4 lety +5

      Michael Blackshire I cant believe he actually knows who he is lol

    • @shizaanimations7634
      @shizaanimations7634 Před 4 lety +12

      Gunther Ultrabolt Novacrunch Okay, while I agree that John is hilarious, using the “well he’s done more than you so you don’t get to talk” argument is childish and stupid.

  • @live_ur_adventure
    @live_ur_adventure Před 4 lety +384

    John: I mean alot to a small group of people
    Me: bold of you to assume Gen Z doesn't worship you like a strange cult because we relate so strongly

    • @graybirdwoods2264
      @graybirdwoods2264 Před 3 lety +13

      Yeah, we are not a small group, we are a whole generation who this one man in his thirties means a lot too

    • @YaosaysObjection
      @YaosaysObjection Před 2 lety +5

      I'm pretty sure he's got the younger millennials too. Everyone I know whose an American under 30 loves this dude

    • @whateverlolawants
      @whateverlolawants Před 2 lety +2

      I think most millennials like him. I was introduced to him about 6 years ago by my ex, who has a very similar sense of humor and was born in 1981. I was born in 1986 and share his stuff with a lot of friends my age. I'm so glad Gen Z loves him!

    • @ayyrar1770
      @ayyrar1770 Před 2 lety

      Me and my friends are obsessed with him😭

  • @QueenPandanimaniac
    @QueenPandanimaniac Před 4 lety +72

    That 3rd amendment bit aged like a fiiiiiine wine

  • @justme-ji2il
    @justme-ji2il Před 4 lety +244

    Love when Mulaney hosts because snl feels like that Hader/Armisen/Wiig/Rudolph/Meyers/Samberg era again

  • @emilyharwood89
    @emilyharwood89 Před 4 lety +326

    That was the most solid, funniest monologue I've ever seen

    • @jacktrppr1
      @jacktrppr1 Před 4 lety +9

      Agreed. This could easily be part of one of his Stand-up specials....hilarious!

    • @ayearedee99
      @ayearedee99 Před 4 lety +5

      He should do this for a living.

    • @lexiesawyer7657
      @lexiesawyer7657 Před 4 lety

      BJB aggressive

    • @SuperLotus
      @SuperLotus Před 4 lety

      To me, he was just the Law and Order joke guy...UNTIL NOW.
      Now he's the Law and Order and Amendment guy

  • @chloe_3787
    @chloe_3787 Před 4 lety +176

    The constitution bit is funny to me because literally just yesterday my Civics and Econ teacher went on for *45 minutes* about how important the 3rd amendment is and I’m over here scratching my head like “and when did women get the right to vote? Oh right, the 19th!”

    • @tatehildyard5332
      @tatehildyard5332 Před 4 lety +13

      To be fair, we just got done chasing the Redcoats out and we were still very salty about the taxes. The vibe of the Constitutional Convention was basically, "Fuck the Redcoats... but we might as well make and iron out a few alternative policies since we're already here".

    • @MaddDogg316
      @MaddDogg316 Před 4 lety +4

      Just an FYI, women had a right to vote, however, it was very circumstantial. During the initial few decades of this country's existence, land owners were the ones that had a right to vote. During this same time period, women who owned land were few and far between. The only women that owned land were widows or young girls who were heirs to estates of deceased parents. Women were married at very young ages and if they were widowed, they remarried shortly. Women who did not remarry were seen as a nuisance by the men in power and were often turned into targets of greed economically and socially. As the years went on and the population steadily rose, these situations became more prevalent. So it was enacted that voting was no longer going to be determined by the status of "land owner".

    • @TheAmityElf
      @TheAmityElf Před 4 lety +16

      (Well, white women got the right to vote in 1920; everyone else had to wait until 1965-ish.)

    • @zacharykroll7526
      @zacharykroll7526 Před 4 lety

      The third amendment was invoked last week. Nobody has had to invoke the 19th in over 40 years. Take a wild guess which one is more relevant.

    • @rustylee1836
      @rustylee1836 Před 3 lety +3

      @@zacharykroll7526 A million billion percent the right for women to vote is the more important and relevant amendment of the two. Glad I'm not smoking what you are. Asbestos, presumably.

  • @MaddieFish16
    @MaddieFish16 Před 4 lety +13

    John is super gracious, my friend had health issues (not life and death but serious) and he made time to see her at a show and say hi and I love him all the more for it

  • @abbeybrickner6603
    @abbeybrickner6603 Před 4 lety +93

    "Nobody wants to watch me eat sour patch kids and repeat gossip" 😂 I will live by this now

  • @taragilesbie94
    @taragilesbie94 Před 4 lety +94

    Thank GOD some new John Mulaney content for me to memorize word for word I have been STARVING

  • @JustHereForCats
    @JustHereForCats Před 4 lety +50

    "I mean a lot to a tiny group of people"
    But you literally mean the world to us John 😭😭😭

  • @BlackGaySlay
    @BlackGaySlay Před 4 lety +18

    the dad being emotional part is sooo true my father just turned 60 and he's hugged me more in the past year than he ever did during my childhood

  • @wyn001
    @wyn001 Před 4 lety +237

    "Lin-Manuel Miranda was my first choice!"
    that is so brutal😭😭

  • @Polo-rp9hk
    @Polo-rp9hk Před 4 lety +512

    He’s really good, he should consider being a stand-up comedian!

  • @haileyholloway7913
    @haileyholloway7913 Před 3 lety +15

    I love how he laughs at himself too.... 🤣 he's literally the best

  • @BekahBrown
    @BekahBrown Před 4 lety +142

    AND LOOK AT THAT, we can add 3rd Amendment to our End of the World 2020 bingo.

  • @rain.enthusiast
    @rain.enthusiast Před 4 lety +579

    damn... john mulaney really is popping and everybody does love him

  • @partlyironic
    @partlyironic Před 4 lety +251

    I honestly have this theory that Make a Wish Foundation kids are amongst the funniest people in the world. I have limited but very compelling data regarding this.

    • @katyscott87
      @katyscott87 Před 4 lety +8

      Look up Josh Sundquist. I'm pretty sure he got a Make-a-wish granted as a kid. He survived, and now he's a youtuber/ stand-up comedian/ motivational speaker.

    • @CMZIEBARTH
      @CMZIEBARTH Před 4 lety +1

      Your comment gets a thumbs up.

    • @hunnysenpai7249
      @hunnysenpai7249 Před 4 lety +1

      Please share the data

    • @lenaertsjelke
      @lenaertsjelke Před 4 lety +35

      So true. I don’t know if you’re a Marvel fan but Chris Hemsworth once told the story of how a Make a Wish Foundation kid came to visit the set of Thor Ragnarok and in the movie there’s a fight between Thor and the Hulk and the kid thought it would be a funny thing if Thor would say “he’s a friend from work” and Chris did just that and they kept it in the movie and has since become one of the more iconic lines in the fandom and overall just made for a very funny moment.

    • @phriedokra6158
      @phriedokra6158 Před 4 lety +1

      Dying brings out clarity and truth.

  • @RobbieLeffel
    @RobbieLeffel Před 4 lety +23

    John told more jokes in 8 minutes than I think most comedians usually tell in a normal half hour set. That was incredible!

  • @emilyfayehare
    @emilyfayehare Před 4 lety +72

    Who could have predicted that his 3rd Amendment joke would become so relevant? 🤷🏼‍♀️

  • @spartyman7
    @spartyman7 Před 4 lety +100

    "Your mom has friends, and they have husbands." My mom is dead, and this joke still rocks.

    • @willowmarie218
      @willowmarie218 Před 4 lety +4

      my dad is dead.... and same

    • @MaddDogg316
      @MaddDogg316 Před 4 lety +1

      I am dead but it was still true while I was alive.

  • @civil_villain
    @civil_villain Před 4 lety +120

    I really like John Mulaney. He helped to teach me that I need to know algebra unless I want to lose an eye.

    • @MsGrapeNehi
      @MsGrapeNehi Před 4 lety +6

      Civil Villain That story definitely made sense.

    • @civil_villain
      @civil_villain Před 4 lety +2

      @@MsGrapeNehi
      Thank you. Thank you for the perfect response :)

  • @PhillyFrank1
    @PhillyFrank1 Před 4 lety +70

    On top of everything else, Mulaney is totally working that suit. I'm totally proud to be in the small group of people that considers him important.
    He's totally right about Boomer dads.

  • @eleonoramaciel6273
    @eleonoramaciel6273 Před 4 lety +10

    the band staring at him like he put the moon and stars in the sky is the most precious thing ever

  • @elicather8168
    @elicather8168 Před 4 lety +96

    About the same time he was making the joke about his dad being really emotional, my dad texted me only saying “I love you”, and my first thought was....”who died!?”

  • @notdestini
    @notdestini Před 4 lety +1597

    "I mean a lot to a small group of people" namely gays under 30 with anxiety

    • @rytsuryn
      @rytsuryn Před 4 lety +124

      Today I learned something about myself.

    • @miss.markers
      @miss.markers Před 4 lety +89

      I was about to deny it but shit you’re right

    • @30catsinacardigan22
      @30catsinacardigan22 Před 4 lety +46

      too fucking loud

    • @brittanylawless680
      @brittanylawless680 Před 4 lety +79

      I'm a gay over 30 with anxiety, can I still be part of the group?

    • @jennat1483
      @jennat1483 Před 4 lety +43

      i can't believe i've just been called out like this

  • @Silverwind87
    @Silverwind87 Před 4 lety +187

    "I dislike the founding fathers immensely."
    -John Mulaney

  • @mateahissorry
    @mateahissorry Před 3 lety +29

    "Gentlemen he's invoked the third.
    Let's FALL OUT!
    And Find ANOTHER HOUSE!
    To LIVE IN!"

    • @trumpetpunk42
      @trumpetpunk42 Před 3 lety

      Nope, in real life they just shoot you and your dog, like the jackbooted thugs they are: randazza.wordpress.com/2013/07/04/third-amendment-case-in-nevada/

    • @snowleopard064
      @snowleopard064 Před 3 lety

      A THING THAT WE DO!

  • @BrophyMC
    @BrophyMC Před 4 lety +306

    The army can’t live in your house 😂😂

    • @TonyMaynard-SD
      @TonyMaynard-SD Před 4 lety +14

      @thisguy Yeah but I think the joke was about how it was something America was going through that wasn't going to matter or necessarily work correctly in the future, like the 2nd amendment.

    • @ryanlewand6963
      @ryanlewand6963 Před 4 lety +8

      @@TonyMaynard-SD actually without that, it's very possible during the civil war, and other conflicts, the army could do that. During the revolution, the British would constantly take over peoples farms and houses because that was common practice, it's why that went into the constitution. It's worked out fine still to this day, just like the 2nd.

    • @michaelsmith1262
      @michaelsmith1262 Před 4 lety +4

      @@TonyMaynard-SD A lot of people are alive that would have been murdered if not for the 2nd amendment. Unless you can magically do away with all guns, the 2nd amendment is absolutely necessary.

    • @no_peace
      @no_peace Před 4 lety

      This is like a *forever list*?

  • @andymoffit8272
    @andymoffit8272 Před 4 lety +123

    John Mulaney will probably go down as one of the most influential comics of all time and it’s amazing to be here from the beginning

  • @Sleepy-Rebel
    @Sleepy-Rebel Před 4 lety +38

    When he said, "I'm not a dad, but I observed one."... for a moment I thought he was talking about God. Like God the father...

  • @tyde4610
    @tyde4610 Před 4 lety +22

    I love watching the band members in the back laughing at the jokes