Yep. I can not stop stop saying sorry. Then people get annoyed by me saying sorry so much, which makes me feel worse, and I want to apologize for annoying them, but I can't....
Yeah I constantly feel the need to say sorry because u never know what is going on in someone else's head so I try to picture how the other person must think
Here's how you give a speech. 1. Never make eye contact with the audience. 2. Pick out several items along the back and side walls of the room. 3. Look at those while you're talking to create the illusion of eye contact.
An introvert party is allll in the minnnd, or if you're really feeling badass, you will invite over one person to talk about how cats are such good listeners (because they don't listen at all). And that will be enough party for the entire year lol.
It's so difficult to introduce oneself to other people. Like, when you are not loud enough they'll think that you are rude and if you are too loud you just sound awkward...
OMG!!! I totally know what you're saying. I have been told (by my own dad) that I was a snob in high school just because I was shy. I had many people say that they thought I was rude as well. The truth is that no matter how hard I try, my voice is sooo low that I prefer just to write things down instead of say them out loud. So glad someone else TRULY gets it. :D
I know how you feel. Usually when I'm just greeting someone or thanking them or whatever I'm literally whispering, but I feel like I would 've awkward to repeat myself louder.
Aaah~ I remember those days. There were two teachers I could speak to without fear of judgement for my existence because they were awkward shy people that were awesome and let me and my clan hide in their rooms to recharge throughout the day. 😋 .....and Then There Was that One Dude teacher who knew I was terrified of him (he was tall and muscular, like literally a black Chris Evans with tattoos, and a Mona Lisa smile...whom was very extroverted) and so he would always ninja up behind me and laugh uproariously when I instantly froze, did the horror movie Slow Turn, and squeaked like crazy as I skittered to hide behind a friend... 😑
Doodling Roses and when you should say something in class like in a lesson and start thinking and planning after a long time there is no time able to talk and then u say yaas
*"And you don't have to apologize for your existence."* I know you were probably half joking when you said that, but I've apologized like that so many times now. I just wanna thank you for saying that. So, thank you.
And the worst thing is when you start an argument and you support your opinion with passion but in the end you apologize to the other person and pretend to have changed your opinion...
I've literally been trained out of this by uni friends with hand smacks and candy rewards. Weirdly enough, it stuck For The Most Part past Uni. This is my 3rd year outta uni. I've only apologized for my existence 20 times!! *flails arms* IT USED TO BE 45 PER /DAY/! I mean, I still mentally do it but I stopped verbalizing it 😂😂😂
i hate that. i generally just go to one of my (few) friends, unless i haven't yet made friends with anyone in the group, or if they say to choose someone you don't know... in which case i wait for someone to come to me.
OH god...That shit sucks, You're in a classroom just minding your buisness or you are at work and then your teacher/boss tells the class to partner up with somebody...Makes me sad inside when they do that. Whenever it's happened to be in the time it takes for people to partner up, I'm usually that one guy who has to take the last one standing or have somebody help me join up with somebody. Thankfully those days are over but occasionally they happen at my work.
As an extreme introvert, I can GUARANTEE that bravely venturing to someone and forcing yourself to say "hi" or "hello" to a new face gives them a better first impression of you than from you just sitting quietly. It's very terrifying though, so if they nicely greet you back you get this weird feeling of satisfaction. I'm not sure about greeting people you already know, though. (You know-- those people you've seen around a couple times, probably because they're a friend's friend.) Because, well, they know you as kind of quiet, possibly because they're one of the people whom you didn't find the courage to greet. So if they find you shy and quiet and you're suddenly striding toward them and exclaiming, "HELLO!" you feel like that would be coming on too strong. I feel like this comment explained my feelings nicely
I know that feel bro! Every time at a new environment, party or summer camp, I feel like if you dont force yourself to act outgoing and saying hi at the very beginning, you will hardly make it. Every time you see someone that is less than friend but more than stranger, the awkward situation always comes. If i suddenly get very open and enthusiastic, im afraid that i might overdo it and it looks fake and embarrassing cause i already gave them an impression of shy and quiet. So during the time i was hesitating, that person might already find another one to talk then i just feel relaxed but start to worry about next time....
I'm starting college in the morning and I feel like this will be me: "Hi, I'm you! Nice Jen to meet! " And then I would waddle away like the penguin I am.
I am an extremely shy person so I bring books with me everywhere I go so that I never have to talk to people but then I feel bad because people probably think I'm being rude
My mom has made a lot of my friends for me. She talks to the friend's parents. Then she plans a meet up so they (the parents) can talk. The parents drag their shy kid to the gathering. This continues for another ten meet ups and by this point the shy kid and I have seen each other enough that we speak and then bond over our shyness. Not sure why this has always worked or if the parents are planning for it to go this way. They probably are.
and THIS is why it got so weird when i hit the age where not everyone around my age has a parent with them 100% of the time. it's like "wait how do i do this? what's going on? help!"
Weirdly enough, I can not talk to strangers at all. If I don't know someone it nearly kills me to have a conversation with them. I hate it. The weird thing though is that I have no problems with public speaking. I may not know a single person in the room but giving a speech or presentation doesn't bother me.
I think it's probably because you have it all prepared and written down, and time to think it out. I use to be exactly like that, and still sometimes am. :) First impressions stick a lot when you first meet someone too, and people always want to give a first good impression, usually, anyways.
What helps me is to take an interest in them, maybe ask what they do for work, what they like to do, etc. You're bound to find some common ground if you ask some basic questions. Perhaps then you won't think of them as much of a stranger.
It's similar for me. I don't feel as nervous when giving a presentation because that's what you're expected to do, but I get really scared when trying to approach and talk to someone I don't know well, because it's not like you're expected to walk up to them and have a conversation with them.
I did the same thing a couple months ago, and it really wasn't that bad. I actually had a lot of people reach out to me, many of my teachers became my friends, and it turns out that being homeschooled is a great conversation starter! Most public-schoolers have no idea what it's like :)
I was public schooled all my life, but I have really good friends who were homeschooled. If you fall in with the right crowd you'll get along fine (protip: look for people with similar interests)
OMG THAT MUST BE TERRIFYING. As a homeschooler who's been thrown into many activities with the average public schooled citizens, i understand your fears and will be praying for you dear stranger on the internet. Good luck.
paul nathan Misconception. Shyness often stems from minor social phobias. Introversion is more of a different style of interaction. Introverts genuinely desire social interaction, but it is draining, making introverts desire solitary time to recharge. Shyness is more of a roadblock towards desired interaction, an irrational fear of such contact paired with much longing for it. It is true that they often overlap, but there are a lot more shy extroverts out there than you would think. It also helps to understand that there is no such thing as 100% introvert or 100% extrovert. It's like being right or left handed. Just because one side is dominant doesn't mean the other is absent. (Sorry about the book I just left there, I get carried away sometimes).
1= to answer the question; worst case scenario? I walk up to someone new and my voice is soooo low that nobody is able to hear it. I try very hard to talk loud, it just doesn't come out very loud.2= I HATE talking on the phone. If I could text all day, I would. Most people don't understand this but it's true. I can type up a storm on my phone/computer. But to talk to people on the phone (unless it's at my job) it's just too hard for me to do. The ONLY person I LOVE to talk to on the phone is my fiancé. I even would prefer to text/message my family and BFF.3= Neither my fiancé nor myself asked the other out. Long story, but we just started going out and eventually wound up together. Can't really explain it.4= Actually that is the MOST true about me. I am annoying my family soooo much with my apologizing ALL the time. I have even been known to tell new friends that if I apologize too much just let me know. My sister is the one who gets upset with it the most. She starts yelling at me about not apologizing. My dad has even told me that the more you apologize to others, the less it means to the other person.5= He is right it doesn't work. One time in training for a job I had to get up in front of the class and I burst into (silent) tears. I was scared and everyone was watching me. I couldn't handle it. The next job after that, during training, my voice was soooo low that even the instructor (who stood next to me) couldn't hear me. So there was NO WAY anyone could hear me in the back row. I thought he was going to REALLY tell us how to talk in front of people. I have a new job coming up a week from this Monday and nervous about having to go up in front of the group of new coworkers.6= I love music and love to slow dance with my man. But I HATE fast dancing. I love sitting and watching others have fun. That is MY way of having fun. My sister even refuses to go out "dancing" with me cause I am just a "bump on a log" like she would say. But that is just me.What non shy people have to realize is that is just how we are. And if they can't accept US shy people, than forget about them. They don't deserve our friendship.
I act really funny crazy with my family but wheneveer i go out of the house i get shy and dont act The 100% funny crazy instead i act the 10-20% funny crazy and i Get supper quiet im quiet ALL THE TIME IM OUT THE HOUSE i could also make funny jokes like when i told my mom that if i could donate some of the clothes that i dont use to people who dont have to many clothes you know homeless people and she said yes so i GAVE it to my sis because SHE seems to NOT HAVE NO CLOTHES IN HER GIANT CLÓSET ,SHE USES THE SAME OUTFIT FOR WHO KNOWS HOW MANY DAYS, WEEKS!😨 and every ONE in the room ended cracking themselves😂😂😂😂 AND ...YOU....ARE......SO.....CRAZY!! I Like it😄😄😜😜😄😜😝😄😄 NEW SUBSCRIBER!😂😂😂
As an introvert and shy person, most of the time, I can relate to this video so much. The best advice that you did give was that when meeting a new person or someone you are interested in just say "hi" and smile, you will be amazed how many doors that will open.
I can totally relate to most of these! XD It's kinda weird though because although I'm usually quiet, I tend to have an extraverted side which, once unleashed, runs pretty rampant and I feel like taking to EVERYONE! Sometimes I'm just full of energy and i just want to jump in and talk to people just because they're there! Lol It really depends on my mood though, and I wish I could harness my extravert powers all the time, but it's usually it's just kind of spontaneous...:/ It's not really the same when I try to force it. Although I'm working on just being more sociable overall, which helps. :)
I lot of these are pretty accurate to me. I actually did the best man speech at my brother's wedding last month and I ended it with "ALRIGHT I DIDN'T FAINT!"
Idk why but I started crying when you said I don't have to apologize for my own existence. I was brought up to say sorry whenever I do wrong & I've been thinking for so long that it's wrong for me to be.... well, me. I don't know, I'm just really grateful for that message. God bless you! Continue to do what you're doing!
Walking through the halls every morning when going to school and feeling observed and getting anxious. Heart starts bumping faster AND faster AND faster. Wanting only to cover AND hide yourself. Having the need to take a big breath and prepare yourself mentally every single day. It is tough.
I made friends without thinking about it when I was younger... now it's like my shyness/introversion has been magnified as I've gotten older. I'm in the process of overcoming it, but all of these situations still haunt me, haha. As a fellow introvert, thank you, Blimey Cow! I'm not alone...
AHA! PROOF THAT HOMESCHOOLERS HAVE NO SOCIAL SKILLS! jk ^_^ I've noticd that Messy Mondays is like the reverse of Messyges. One you give awesome advice, the other you giver horrible advice XD Also-- a dark basement? I thought it was your room....
Knew that was gonna happen. It has nothing to do with being homeschooled, dear. I know and have known plenty of government educated people who have zero social skills and no desire to interact with other human beings. And "public" school is and was, just sheer torture because anyone who is different is usually abused by the other government drones. Home schooling has actually probably helped him find the confidence to do what he does. Nice try.
***** Is that Josh typing? Or someone else? If it's Josh, please answer this question: Are you guys actually jerks to each other or is that just a blimey cow thing?
On behalf of all the introverts out there, THANK YOU for this video! My favorites: "Give the speech while dying a little bit inside." and "Turn the camera off, I've exhausted my social energy for today." Yep. Totally relate.
what's worse is when you try to talk to people and they give you that awkward look, but isn't it wrong for them to not be understanding enough to see that you're nervous? what do they do? they make you feel even worse about it...nice job 😅 you're worth the time you spend and effort you put in, and anyone that doesn't want to give you that isn't worth you wasting your breath over.
When you're giving a speech or performance, just imagine that ur one of the audience members, no one knows or cares if you look nervous accept for you.
Thanks! I was making the mistake of considering myself as a nuisance to anyone & therefore apologizing for any stupid thing & the worst part is that I called it courtesy!
I'm a introvert and shy. Even when I'm online when people say crap bout me I'm just like, "Sorry, I just wanted a friend. I'll stop talking to you. I'm so sorry." And in real life it's worse.
I have been a very shy person my entire life and was sort of peer pressured into joining the speech and debate team at my school and I think it's one of the best things that's ever happened to me. It's helped me get out of my bubble.
Oh gosh it's so relatable. But I just need to make one amendment. If you overcome your shyness and do one of those actions and it goes smoothly - somehow you gain confidence and even charisma for the rest of the day, fear disappears and you feel like you're capable of anything. But then comes tomorrow and everything starts from scratch - you're back to your pathetic self and like yesterday confidence didn't even exist. No matter how often you force yourself to do things you're scared of. You know many people like to say that if you get over youself enough times at some point shyness will be gone for good. The don't know shit, the bitter truth - it never will. Tested. Only for a while. Something just wrong fundamentally, you need to rebuild yourself to be a new person, but how?
As difficult as being around them may be sometimes, I must say I do still appreciate extroverts. Here is why. See,this is the way the cycle normally runs if I am lucky: Me *thrown into group of extroverts and introverts who all know each other* *quietly watches everyone socialize* *eventually one compassionate extrovert takes pity and edges over to me and introduces themselves*. *Then, said amazing person brings me into the circle* Extrovert friends have helped me make friends many times this way. XD So thank you extroverts! As much as you drain us all of energy sometimes, we still love and value you dearly.
Haha love it!! I can totally relate to the "meeting a friend of a friend" situation. And you're right. The only way to not make it really awkward is to go for it and introduce yourself right away. I sometimes forget to do this, but I'm living proof that it works when I actually do it.
I was just about to go to sleep then my phone notified me that you guys posted and I was like "blimy cow is my important than sleep" and what else did I want to say oh right: FIRST COMMENT!!
I hate it when, i WANT to say hi to someone (i first imagine me saying hi to that person in my mind over & over again..........) I get half of the word out, then i back down. i walk away and go bright red. This is me everyday, with EVERYONE! I really don't like being shy!!!
If you enjoy spending time with yourself better than with lots of people (or people in general), chances are you're an introvert. I'm just a shy person who enjoy some "me time" now and then, and not hanging out with lots of people xD
I've always defined it as whether you get your energy from being alone (introvert) or from being with other people (extrovert). For example, although an introvert may enjoy the occasional social activity, it tends to drain their energy and then they recharge by spending time alone.
A lot of people think I'm shy and I think I used to be; but actually I'm just way too lazy to actually talk to people. I like the company of other people and when they talk to me, but I'm just too lazy to start a conversation sometimes.
Introverts can be social and adept at conversations and making friends, and extroverts can be extremely awkward and socially inept. The difference is that introverts need to recharge their batteries after a fun time with friends by being alone, and an extrovert needs people to relax after too long by themselves.
"It's ok to be shy."... Really blimey cow, really? Shyness is not synonymous with introversion. You guys are smart you should know this. Introversion is a personality type which is just as valid as extroversion, however, shyness is the fear of social interactions. Therefore introvertion is who you are, but shyness is a weakness that you must try to overcome. Although many people get this wrong it is an incredibly important distinction, especially for introverts.
I don't think "It's ok to be shy" is the best example of his untrue comparison between shyness and introversion...It really is okay to be shy! What got me down a little was the phrase "when this world is filled with extroverts" as if you can't be a shy extrovert.
I've been on the internet and in the right places long enough to know that everyone thinks about introversion differently. Some consider it to be "shyness." Some consider it to be "whether you gain or lose energy during social events." Yet others consider it to be "whether and to what extent you enjoy social interaction." There are probably a few other less popular definitions around too.
RetryAgainAgain that's the problem. No one knows what introvert really means. i think most people would say the Myers Brigs personality types define introversion vs extroversion very well. on the other hand shyness is a form of fear or animosity (since when was it "ok" to live your life in fear?). these words do have definitions and i wish blimey cow, usually a very accurate source, would not feed the confusion.
I understand the distinction however, I do not see shyness as a weakness. We live in a society where being outgoing/talkative is rewarded and preferred but this does not make shyness a weakness. Additionally, if shyness were a weakness then why do we do we still have shy people if from an evolutionary perspective the weak don't survive. I am not an introvert, I am shy. Shyness is a part of me, part of my identity, perhaps its that way because I make it so nonetheless it is a part of me. What is important is to not let shyness control you.
This has helped so much. I used to worry, overthink and apologise far too much. I was that shy kid in the back of the room writing a book. Thank you :)
oh my word! this is my life!!! every single thing on this is true, especially the phone thing, apologizing and being an annoyance, public speaking, dancing and judging people, regretting saying yes to meeting a friend.. lol i just realized i put almost the whole list. i dont really mind talking to new people, its just when im having a really good convo (for once) and then someone else comes and joins in.... i dont say anything.... i either leave and read a book or wait till the person has left but it sorta makes the convo die.. lol...
1:40 I can't xD I hate talking on the phone. 1:57 Phone always on silence and always away from me xD Yes I'm a loner ok ;-; I don't mind only having like 3 friends xD
+MCbeccy89 yea same here, but I got some group chats of some gangs where I'm unexpectedly stuck in, and I'm the most uncontactable person there :3 idk that they might know I'm actually avoiding them all this time
im a homeschooler and i dont talk to people my age i talk to adults but the kids my age dont agree with what i beleave and they infuriate me also i have never had a phone
this video was very encouraging. I love that blimey cow makes it clear there are lots of people like me who are shy, and it's okay to be who you are if your shy or not.
In my opinion, this is one of the best Messy Monday episodes they've made in a while. Great advice, accurate points, and, of course, the sarcasm that makes you laugh. I especially loved the part about asking someone out. "If this person means enough to you that you want to pursue a relationship with them, they should be worth the courage it's going to take to look them in the eye and ask them out." So true!! Awesome job, guys. :)
It's hard to tell because, like he said in the video, he has a completely different personality when he isn't acting. At least after this vid we all know he is an introvert. Maybe INTJ?
Yesterday I was waiting in a long line at the store & the guy behind me kept whispering something over my shoulder & I kept saying "What?", then he blurted out "You're beautiful!" & everyone else in the line started looking uncomfortable & shifting around & I was "Thank you"....I'm glad I'm not shy...or prone to public outbursts.
Life itself is an awkward situation for shy people.
Oh yeah.
hwgray Yep!!!
yeah!
hwgray
... Yeah.
hwgray the replies of this comment are awkward
The endlessly apologizing because you're afraid you annoy people with your existence thing speaks to me on a personal level.
Me too.
princesskatie331 me too 😩
Yep. I can not stop stop saying sorry. Then people get annoyed by me saying sorry so much, which makes me feel worse, and I want to apologize for annoying them, but I can't....
Yeah I constantly feel the need to say sorry because u never know what is going on in someone else's head so I try to picture how the other person must think
@@456puff its hurts
How true this is to me.
And all the introverts said: AMEN!
AMEN!
Amen! Wait, I'm not introvert... Or mayve, just a bit... Ok, BIG AMEN!!!
A TO THE MEN !!!!
AMEN!
Amen!!!!!!!!!
Here's how you give a speech.
1. Never make eye contact with the audience.
2. Pick out several items along the back and side walls of the room.
3. Look at those while you're talking to create the illusion of eye contact.
The best illusion of eye contact is to look at the nose instead of the eyes. It will seem as though you are looking directly at their eyes. Try it.
Jeyna LSC be careful though you can look cross-eyed
Tiffany797000 Haha! I've done that many times, I doubt I do. But it's still better to stare them straight in the eye. They feel obligated to listen.
Haha! Ok I shall keep that tip then
i always do this!
Ain't no party like an Introvert Party cuz an introvert party Don't Start...
An introvert party is a reading party.
An introvert party is allll in the minnnd, or if you're really feeling badass, you will invite over one person to talk about how cats are such good listeners (because they don't listen at all). And that will be enough party for the entire year lol.
This made my day :)
The Black Introvert amazing!
👏👍👍👍
It's so difficult to introduce oneself to other people. Like, when you are not loud enough they'll think that you are rude and if you are too loud you just sound awkward...
OMG!!! I totally know what you're saying. I have been told (by my own dad) that I was a snob in high school just because I was shy. I had many people say that they thought I was rude as well. The truth is that no matter how hard I try, my voice is sooo low that I prefer just to write things down instead of say them out loud. So glad someone else TRULY gets it. :D
True than they say WHAT! I'm like 😒😠
Sonja Gottschalk people say "hi" to me then i say "hi" then they accuse me of ignoring them... am i really that quiet?
Sonja Gottschalk ikr! It's even worse than public speaking!
I know how you feel. Usually when I'm just greeting someone or thanking them or whatever I'm literally whispering, but I feel like I would 've awkward to repeat myself louder.
I'm so shy that in high school that I have to mentally get myself ready when I pass a teacher to greet them.😓
Same
Saphire spirit same and and times i actually make the effort to say something, it's too queit for them to hear it :/
Aaah~ I remember those days. There were two teachers I could speak to without fear of judgement for my existence because they were awkward shy people that were awesome and let me and my clan hide in their rooms to recharge throughout the day. 😋 .....and Then There Was that One Dude teacher who knew I was terrified of him (he was tall and muscular, like literally a black Chris Evans with tattoos, and a Mona Lisa smile...whom was very extroverted) and so he would always ninja up behind me and laugh uproariously when I instantly froze, did the horror movie Slow Turn, and squeaked like crazy as I skittered to hide behind a friend... 😑
SAME
Doodling Roses and when you should say something in class like in a lesson and start thinking and planning after a long time there is no time able to talk and then u say yaas
*"And you don't have to apologize for your existence."*
I know you were probably half joking when you said that, but I've apologized like that so many times now.
I just wanna thank you for saying that.
So, thank you.
And the worst thing is when you start an argument and you support your opinion with passion but in the end you apologize to the other person and pretend to have changed your opinion...
Eli K You should never do that, stick to your guns in a argument, you can take lessons from me, I'm totally obnoxious in a argument!
December Leigh thank you! haha ok I'm taking notes:-P
Lenny The Hopeless- Same here!I'm so tired of saying sorry.I always feel like I'm doing something wrong!
I've literally been trained out of this by uni friends with hand smacks and candy rewards. Weirdly enough, it stuck For The Most Part past Uni. This is my 3rd year outta uni. I've only apologized for my existence 20 times!! *flails arms* IT USED TO BE 45 PER /DAY/! I mean, I still mentally do it but I stopped verbalizing it 😂😂😂
Dancing!!!??? Nope! Avoided it for 42 years. It is possible. 😁
I've been studying treating shyness at home and discovered an awesome website at Sebs shy remedy (check it out on google)
I wasn't so lucky. My Wedding. Awkward.
You forgot when you're in a group and you're told to "partner up!"
i hate that. i generally just go to one of my (few) friends, unless i haven't yet made friends with anyone in the group, or if they say to choose someone you don't know... in which case i wait for someone to come to me.
Lol, I usually just hide. :D (you think I'm joking...)
Omg! I F******* HATE THAT! I'm way too shy to ask :( i hate being shy!
OH god...That shit sucks, You're in a classroom just minding your buisness or you are at work and then your teacher/boss tells the class to partner up with somebody...Makes me sad inside when they do that. Whenever it's happened to be in the time it takes for people to partner up, I'm usually that one guy who has to take the last one standing or have somebody help me join up with somebody. Thankfully those days are over but occasionally they happen at my work.
SO- that's death. I just feel like a loser when everyone has a partner but me
"...can you stop breathing?"
"Yeah, sorry."
This is why I love this channel.
SEP116. Yup that’s me. I’ve probably apologized for basically living
As an extreme introvert, I can GUARANTEE that bravely venturing to someone and forcing yourself to say "hi" or "hello" to a new face gives them a better first impression of you than from you just sitting quietly. It's very terrifying though, so if they nicely greet you back you get this weird feeling of satisfaction.
I'm not sure about greeting people you already know, though. (You know-- those people you've seen around a couple times, probably because they're a friend's friend.) Because, well, they know you as kind of quiet, possibly because they're one of the people whom you didn't find the courage to greet. So if they find you shy and quiet and you're suddenly striding toward them and exclaiming, "HELLO!" you feel like that would be coming on too strong.
I feel like this comment explained my feelings nicely
I know that feel bro! Every time at a new environment, party or summer camp, I feel like if you dont force yourself to act outgoing and saying hi at the very beginning, you will hardly make it. Every time you see someone that is less than friend but more than stranger, the awkward situation always comes. If i suddenly get very open and enthusiastic, im afraid that i might overdo it and it looks fake and embarrassing cause i already gave them an impression of shy and quiet. So during the time i was hesitating, that person might already find another one to talk then i just feel relaxed but start to worry about next time....
Yeah that's how I feel in my college class now.. they know me as quiet.. I'm afraid to even ask questions during class cause of this
I'm starting college in the morning and I feel like this will be me:
"Hi, I'm you! Nice Jen to meet! " And then I would waddle away like the penguin I am.
I am an extremely shy person so I bring books with me everywhere I go so that I never have to talk to people but then I feel bad because people probably think I'm being rude
My mom has made a lot of my friends for me. She talks to the friend's parents. Then she plans a meet up so they (the parents) can talk. The parents drag their shy kid to the gathering. This continues for another ten meet ups and by this point the shy kid and I have seen each other enough that we speak and then bond over our shyness. Not sure why this has always worked or if the parents are planning for it to go this way. They probably are.
and THIS is why it got so weird when i hit the age where not everyone around my age has a parent with them 100% of the time. it's like "wait how do i do this? what's going on? help!"
I am rapidly hitting that point. I am planning on just becoming a hermit. :P
Emmy Joy just get a pet lol! that's what i am going to do!
I already have two dogs. I will be a hermit who plays with dogs! Wonderful idea!
My mom always try to help sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't eh
Weirdly enough, I can not talk to strangers at all. If I don't know someone it nearly kills me to have a conversation with them. I hate it. The weird thing though is that I have no problems with public speaking. I may not know a single person in the room but giving a speech or presentation doesn't bother me.
I think it's probably because you have it all prepared and written down, and time to think it out. I use to be exactly like that, and still sometimes am. :) First impressions stick a lot when you first meet someone too, and people always want to give a first good impression, usually, anyways.
What helps me is to take an interest in them, maybe ask what they do for work, what they like to do, etc. You're bound to find some common ground if you ask some basic questions. Perhaps then you won't think of them as much of a stranger.
Cold Ham on Rye It’s the opposite for me though
It's similar for me. I don't feel as nervous when giving a presentation because that's what you're expected to do, but I get really scared when trying to approach and talk to someone I don't know well, because it's not like you're expected to walk up to them and have a conversation with them.
I'm a shy extrovert. I like being around people, and I'd like to be social with them. I'm just terrible at it. I hate myself.
I feel your pain
I think of it as being shy but aggressive.
Do not hate yourself because God loves you 🙃🙂
'Who are you talking to?'
'Stay tuned for bloopers!'
I laughed so hard XD
i posted a new vid
pece
Hi I'm Jordan, nice to meet me!
*Shrieks*
3:38 - Number 2: [holds 3 fingers]
Nice catch!
I saw it too!!!
I saw that as well! I'm surprised they didn't catch it, but I think it makes the "freak out some more" part even funnier. :)
Lol saw it too. Was trying to find someone else who noticed it in the comments
being shy has its charm
This is actually helpful for me. I am getting thrown into public school after being home schooled all my life. Next week.
I did the same thing a couple months ago, and it really wasn't that bad. I actually had a lot of people reach out to me, many of my teachers became my friends, and it turns out that being homeschooled is a great conversation starter! Most public-schoolers have no idea what it's like :)
Welp... Nice knowing ya! You're screwed, and don't get corrupt.
nerdquinn Just rehearse 'You Might Be A Homeschooler If . . . ' and use that!
I was public schooled all my life, but I have really good friends who were homeschooled. If you fall in with the right crowd you'll get along fine (protip: look for people with similar interests)
OMG THAT MUST BE TERRIFYING. As a homeschooler who's been thrown into many activities with the average public schooled citizens, i understand your fears and will be praying for you dear stranger on the internet. Good luck.
I love his laugh. It's a shy laugh but it's one of those laughs that makes everyone else smile.
6. JUDGE THEM......hahahahaha
This is awesome! And I can actually relate to some of it! :D
What is this for what is it about anyway LPShannah
Lps hannah you r awesome!!!!!
Lpshannah, you're shy?? ? ? I can relate to all of it lol.
ha ha ha
Me too. Isnt it obvious that Jordan is an introvert?
omg! all of my pains in one awesome video! :D I luv it!
BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! Grin Fiskur THIS IS FOR YOU!!! LOL
I hate being shy
Pencil Master me too it is the worst but it cannot be helped :/
Oh marta, you are super sociable!
ahhhh I have my shy side Tori Gutierrez :D a very shy shy side to be exact and it can be quite painful hehe
Introverted and shy, not the same thing. Pet peeve about the difference between the two.
Same here. Hate it when people don't know the difference.
Yes, but someone who's shy is almost always introverted, so they are at least similar.
paul nathan Misconception. Shyness often stems from minor social phobias. Introversion is more of a different style of interaction. Introverts genuinely desire social interaction, but it is draining, making introverts desire solitary time to recharge. Shyness is more of a roadblock towards desired interaction, an irrational fear of such contact paired with much longing for it. It is true that they often overlap, but there are a lot more shy extroverts out there than you would think. It also helps to understand that there is no such thing as 100% introvert or 100% extrovert. It's like being right or left handed. Just because one side is dominant doesn't mean the other is absent.
(Sorry about the book I just left there, I get carried away sometimes).
Paladin585 Wow... That was probably the best description of shyness, intro and extrovertedness I've ever read.
Paladin585 amazing explanation, I hope you reward yourself with an ice cream or something 🍦
I'm like shy but it's when I'm not with my friends but when I'm with them I'm a crazy monster
Step 6: JUDGE THEM
The answer to every introvert awkward social situation
1= to answer the question; worst case scenario? I walk up to someone new and my voice is soooo low that nobody is able to hear it. I try very hard to talk loud, it just doesn't come out very loud.2= I HATE talking on the phone. If I could text all day, I would. Most people don't understand this but it's true. I can type up a storm on my phone/computer. But to talk to people on the phone (unless it's at my job) it's just too hard for me to do. The ONLY person I LOVE to talk to on the phone is my fiancé. I even would prefer to text/message my family and BFF.3= Neither my fiancé nor myself asked the other out. Long story, but we just started going out and eventually wound up together. Can't really explain it.4= Actually that is the MOST true about me. I am annoying my family soooo much with my apologizing ALL the time. I have even been known to tell new friends that if I apologize too much just let me know. My sister is the one who gets upset with it the most. She starts yelling at me about not apologizing. My dad has even told me that the more you apologize to others, the less it means to the other person.5= He is right it doesn't work. One time in training for a job I had to get up in front of the class and I burst into (silent) tears. I was scared and everyone was watching me. I couldn't handle it. The next job after that, during training, my voice was soooo low that even the instructor (who stood next to me) couldn't hear me. So there was NO WAY anyone could hear me in the back row. I thought he was going to REALLY tell us how to talk in front of people. I have a new job coming up a week from this Monday and nervous about having to go up in front of the group of new coworkers.6= I love music and love to slow dance with my man. But I HATE fast dancing. I love sitting and watching others have fun. That is MY way of having fun. My sister even refuses to go out "dancing" with me cause I am just a "bump on a log" like she would say. But that is just me.What non shy people have to realize is that is just how we are. And if they can't accept US shy people, than forget about them. They don't deserve our friendship.
Introverts Unite!!! ... But like not really cause I don't want to meet a ton of new people.
Introverts unite!
Or don't... Uhhh... Wouldn't wanna make you uncomfortable or anything...
Thank goodness for:
Hermits United. We meet up every 10 years, swap stories about caves. It's good fun. For a Hermit.
Where do I sign? Are there any uniforms? Should I bring snacks?
You don't look like a hermit. 😂😝
paul nathan No idea where to sign up or to wear, but snacks are always good.
Emma Lai No, I suppose not.
i just laughed (eeerr...silently ofc) throughout the whole video because everything was just so spot on
I act really funny crazy with my family but wheneveer i go out of the house i get shy and dont act
The 100% funny crazy instead i act the 10-20% funny crazy and i Get supper quiet im quiet ALL THE TIME IM OUT THE HOUSE i could also make funny jokes like when i told my mom that if i could donate some of the clothes that i dont use to people who dont have to many clothes you know homeless people and she said yes so i GAVE it to my sis because SHE seems to NOT HAVE NO CLOTHES IN HER GIANT CLÓSET ,SHE USES THE SAME OUTFIT FOR WHO KNOWS HOW MANY DAYS, WEEKS!😨 and every ONE in the room ended cracking themselves😂😂😂😂
AND ...YOU....ARE......SO.....CRAZY!!
I Like it😄😄😜😜😄😜😝😄😄
NEW SUBSCRIBER!😂😂😂
You. Just. Spoke. To. Me. On. A. Personal. Level. Wow...
As an introvert and shy person, most of the time, I can relate to this video so much. The best advice that you did give was that when meeting a new person or someone you are interested in just say "hi" and smile, you will be amazed how many doors that will open.
I can totally relate to most of these! XD It's kinda weird though because although I'm usually quiet, I tend to have an extraverted side which, once unleashed, runs pretty rampant and I feel like taking to EVERYONE! Sometimes I'm just full of energy and i just want to jump in and talk to people just because they're there! Lol
It really depends on my mood though, and I wish I could harness my extravert powers all the time, but it's usually it's just kind of spontaneous...:/ It's not really the same when I try to force it. Although I'm working on just being more sociable overall, which helps. :)
"Imagining people in their underwear doesn't work." I know, right? Finally, someone who understands us introverts xD
I lot of these are pretty accurate to me. I actually did the best man speech at my brother's wedding last month and I ended it with "ALRIGHT I DIDN'T FAINT!"
Idk why but I started crying when you said I don't have to apologize for my own existence. I was brought up to say sorry whenever I do wrong & I've been thinking for so long that it's wrong for me to be.... well, me. I don't know, I'm just really grateful for that message. God bless you! Continue to do what you're doing!
Wow! That one really resonated with me too!
This guy just described social anxiety down to a point.
Walking through the halls every morning when going to school and feeling observed and getting anxious. Heart starts bumping faster AND faster AND faster. Wanting only to cover AND hide yourself. Having the need to take a big breath and prepare yourself mentally every single day. It is tough.
OMG that is so funny! 4:00 - 4:15 hhahahah!!!!
"Look at someone and pretend they're the one that fell" 😂😂 I'm using that one!
That guy who did the patron video at the end seems cool.
I know right
"Can you stop breathing?"
"Yeah, sorry."
I died.
This is so me lol, plus fun fact Bae is actually just the Danish word for poop ;) The more you know
Lol. Everyone's calling their significant other poop these days and they don't even realize it!
***** I'm glad it made the day lol, they used it in the video and that fact just popped into my head from learning earlier so thought I'd share :D
I made friends without thinking about it when I was younger... now it's like my shyness/introversion has been magnified as I've gotten older. I'm in the process of overcoming it, but all of these situations still haunt me, haha. As a fellow introvert, thank you, Blimey Cow! I'm not alone...
"I have like, three friends" SO ME
AHA! PROOF THAT HOMESCHOOLERS HAVE NO SOCIAL SKILLS! jk ^_^ I've noticd that Messy Mondays is like the reverse of Messyges. One you give awesome advice, the other you giver horrible advice XD Also-- a dark basement? I thought it was your room....
We moved to a new location!
Knew that was gonna happen. It has nothing to do with being homeschooled, dear.
I know and have known plenty of government educated people who have zero social skills and no desire to interact with other human beings.
And "public" school is and was, just sheer torture because anyone who is different is usually abused by the other government drones.
Home schooling has actually probably helped him find the confidence to do what he does.
Nice try.
Rhonda Osman I was just kidding, dear. That's whay the "jk" was meant to indicate. I was homeschooled my whole life before I started college at 17.
***** Is that Josh typing? Or someone else? If it's Josh, please answer this question: Are you guys actually jerks to each other or is that just a blimey cow thing?
Laura Mizvaria Pardon my error. I am hyper sensitive about the issue because of all the snark I usually meet. I humbly apologize :)
love this video, because now I know I'm not alone!!!
On behalf of all the introverts out there, THANK YOU for this video! My favorites: "Give the speech while dying a little bit inside." and "Turn the camera off, I've exhausted my social energy for today." Yep. Totally relate.
This video speaks to me on an emotional level
bless Blimeycow
"Can you stop breathing?"
"Yea sorry"
😂😂😂
NO!!!!!!!!! IT CANT BE TRUE!!!!! I WILL NEVER DANCE!!!!
This video is probably the one I have ever laughed at the most. "STAY TUNED FOR BLOOPERSSSS"
That face. That tone of voice. Wow.
Watching Blimey Cow always makes me proud to be a homeschooler. Thanks :)
what's worse is when you try to talk to people and they give you that awkward look, but isn't it wrong for them to not be understanding enough to see that you're nervous? what do they do? they make you feel even worse about it...nice job 😅 you're worth the time you spend and effort you put in, and anyone that doesn't want to give you that isn't worth you wasting your breath over.
When you're giving a speech or performance, just imagine that ur one of the audience members, no one knows or cares if you look nervous accept for you.
I'm totally with you on the meeting new people thing and the thing where I feel like people just want me to shut up and stop talking.
I can relate to this on so many levels, especially meeting new people. I'm not antisocial just over thought and now I've made it awkward.
Thanks! I was making the mistake of considering myself as a nuisance to anyone & therefore apologizing for any stupid thing & the worst part is that I called it courtesy!
another thing that sucks is that getting hired for jobs! even the jobs that are consider great for introverts wants people that are extroverts!
I'm a introvert and shy. Even when I'm online when people say crap bout me I'm just like, "Sorry, I just wanted a friend. I'll stop talking to you. I'm so sorry." And in real life it's worse.
Dude, you're hilarious! :D ...and that is the cutest laugh in the bloopers :)
he probably turned super red reading this..like i probably would lol
lol, maybe.. but that's ok :)
I have been a very shy person my entire life and was sort of peer pressured into joining the speech and debate team at my school and I think it's one of the best things that's ever happened to me. It's helped me get out of my bubble.
Oh gosh it's so relatable. But I just need to make one amendment. If you overcome your shyness and do one of those actions and it goes smoothly - somehow you gain confidence and even charisma for the rest of the day, fear disappears and you feel like you're capable of anything. But then comes tomorrow and everything starts from scratch - you're back to your pathetic self and like yesterday confidence didn't even exist. No matter how often you force yourself to do things you're scared of. You know many people like to say that if you get over youself enough times at some point shyness will be gone for good. The don't know shit, the bitter truth - it never will. Tested. Only for a while. Something just wrong fundamentally, you need to rebuild yourself to be a new person, but how?
I just quickly want to add on, when your shy, being asked to pray in front of a massive group of people becomes terrifying! 😖
This Is Me In One Video.
"Hi, I'm Jordan. Nice to meet me. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Gets me every time. Lol.
Best messy Mondays EVER!!
This was awesome. Favorite part was when said "Play it off like a champ" "Judge her" *she starts walks away slowly and awkwardly* lol.
In my oppinion this is the most funny video you made up until now. I loved it!
As difficult as being around them may be sometimes, I must say I do still appreciate extroverts. Here is why. See,this is the way the cycle normally runs if I am lucky: Me *thrown into group of extroverts and introverts who all know each other* *quietly watches everyone socialize* *eventually one compassionate extrovert takes pity and edges over to me and introduces themselves*. *Then, said amazing person brings me into the circle*
Extrovert friends have helped me make friends many times this way. XD So thank you extroverts! As much as you drain us all of energy sometimes, we still love and value you dearly.
And Interviews gets screwed up coz you don't say all what you can do :P
Haha love it!! I can totally relate to the "meeting a friend of a friend" situation. And you're right. The only way to not make it really awkward is to go for it and introduce yourself right away. I sometimes forget to do this, but I'm living proof that it works when I actually do it.
I met a new person the other day because my friend brought someone to my house
So I said "hi I'm Jack I'm shy and I find it hard to talk to new people
Jack Forrester What happened after that?
Yeah, what happened
Jack Forrester I wanna know what happened ad well.
Not apologize for your existence. I needed that.
I was just about to go to sleep then my phone notified me that you guys posted and I was like "blimy cow is my important than sleep" and what else did I want to say oh right: FIRST COMMENT!!
Nevermind about the first comment thing 😜
I hate it when, i WANT to say hi to someone (i first imagine me saying hi to that person in my mind over & over again..........) I get half of the word out, then i back down. i walk away and go bright red. This is me everyday, with EVERYONE! I really don't like being shy!!!
How do you know if you're introverted or not? Cause I think I'm just plain awkward but I've been told I'm an introvert.
If you enjoy spending time with yourself better than with lots of people (or people in general), chances are you're an introvert.
I'm just a shy person who enjoy some "me time" now and then, and not hanging out with lots of people xD
I've always defined it as whether you get your energy from being alone (introvert) or from being with other people (extrovert). For example, although an introvert may enjoy the occasional social activity, it tends to drain their energy and then they recharge by spending time alone.
A lot of people think I'm shy and I think I used to be; but actually I'm just way too lazy to actually talk to people. I like the company of other people and when they talk to me, but I'm just too lazy to start a conversation sometimes.
cookiesforobama that's exactly how i'd explain it.
Introverts can be social and adept at conversations and making friends, and extroverts can be extremely awkward and socially inept. The difference is that introverts need to recharge their batteries after a fun time with friends by being alone, and an extrovert needs people to relax after too long by themselves.
2:15
My new favorite Josh moment.
"It's ok to be shy."... Really blimey cow, really? Shyness is not synonymous with introversion. You guys are smart you should know this. Introversion is a personality type which is just as valid as extroversion, however, shyness is the fear of social interactions. Therefore introvertion is who you are, but shyness is a weakness that you must try to overcome. Although many people get this wrong it is an incredibly important distinction, especially for introverts.
I don't think "It's ok to be shy" is the best example of his untrue comparison between shyness and introversion...It really is okay to be shy! What got me down a little was the phrase "when this world is filled with extroverts" as if you can't be a shy extrovert.
I've been on the internet and in the right places long enough to know that everyone thinks about introversion differently. Some consider it to be "shyness." Some consider it to be "whether you gain or lose energy during social events." Yet others consider it to be "whether and to what extent you enjoy social interaction." There are probably a few other less popular definitions around too.
RetryAgainAgain that's the problem. No one knows what introvert really means. i think most people would say the Myers Brigs personality types define introversion vs extroversion very well. on the other hand shyness is a form of fear or animosity (since when was it "ok" to live your life in fear?). these words do have definitions and i wish blimey cow, usually a very accurate source, would not feed the confusion.
I understand the distinction however, I do not see shyness as a weakness. We live in a society where being outgoing/talkative is rewarded and preferred but this does not make shyness a weakness. Additionally, if shyness were a weakness then why do we do we still have shy people if from an evolutionary perspective the weak don't survive.
I am not an introvert, I am shy. Shyness is a part of me, part of my identity, perhaps its that way because I make it so nonetheless it is a part of me. What is important is to not let shyness control you.
YES! Thank you, someone else realizes this! Extroverts can be shy and introverts can not be shy.
I do ALL of those!!! Especially the public speaking one and talking to new people.
4 people are extroverts and haven't got a clue!
This has helped so much. I used to worry, overthink and apologise far too much. I was that shy kid in the back of the room writing a book. Thank you :)
Jordan reminds me of Merlin... maybe it's just that I watch that show too much...
YES
I'm watching it right now lol
My cat's name is Merlin
FatDaffodil OMGOSH YASS
+Skyrider IKR
He now needs a friend that looks like Bradley James XD
oh my word! this is my life!!! every single thing on this is true, especially the phone thing, apologizing and being an annoyance, public speaking, dancing and judging people, regretting saying yes to meeting a friend.. lol i just realized i put almost the whole list. i dont really mind talking to new people, its just when im having a really good convo (for once) and then someone else comes and joins in.... i dont say anything.... i either leave and read a book or wait till the person has left but it sorta makes the convo die.. lol...
1:40 I can't xD I hate talking on the phone.
1:57 Phone always on silence and always away from me xD
Yes I'm a loner ok ;-; I don't mind only having like 3 friends xD
I have one :D
lol I have 3 too
I don't have any friends.
All I have are my cats. Meow
two friends ain't bad tho ✌😀
+MCbeccy89 yea same here, but I got some group chats of some gangs where
I'm unexpectedly stuck in, and I'm the most uncontactable person there
:3 idk that they might know I'm actually avoiding them all this time
The endless apologies is so freaking true!
im a homeschooler and i dont talk to people my age i talk to adults but the kids my age dont agree with what i beleave and they infuriate me also i have never had a phone
this video was very encouraging. I love that blimey cow makes it clear there are lots of people like me who are shy, and it's okay to be who you are if your shy or not.
Awesome video!
In my opinion, this is one of the best Messy Monday episodes they've made in a while. Great advice, accurate points, and, of course, the sarcasm that makes you laugh. I especially loved the part about asking someone out. "If this person means enough to you that you want to pursue a relationship with them, they should be worth the courage it's going to take to look them in the eye and ask them out." So true!! Awesome job, guys. :)
nice to meet me xDDD
I'm not really introverted at all, and this video has made my life better.
Well played, BlimeyCow.
You're helping introverts behave like extroverts, that's not embracing your introverted perdonality!
I have a very interesting perdonality
SkyTricks good to know, why are you telling me this?
it was a joke cos u spelt personality wrong
3:09 This is me. Every presentation.
I wonder what Myers-Brigg personality Jordan falls under... Thoughts?
Messyge Jordan and ask! :D
It's hard to tell because, like he said in the video, he has a completely different personality when he isn't acting. At least after this vid we all know he is an introvert. Maybe INTJ?
My guess is: infp - idealistic dreamer.
sopapia111 yayyy... i m an intj haha
Sammy Tortoise infp REPRESENT! :)
Yesterday I was waiting in a long line at the store & the guy behind me kept whispering something over my shoulder & I kept saying "What?", then he blurted out "You're beautiful!" & everyone else in the line started looking uncomfortable & shifting around & I was "Thank you"....I'm glad I'm not shy...or prone to public outbursts.