Should You Bring Your Autistic Child to Church?
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- čas přidán 29. 08. 2024
- Simon has Level 1 Autism, Ezra has Level 3 Autism, and we take them to church. Here are three tips for taking your whole family to church.
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You did good wish everyone would accept that (everyone belongs) no matter what at ability or disability. Our church has a big special needs ministry at educates and loves all .God bless 😊
So true! Thank you so much for sharing! sounds like an awesome church. :)
As an autistic adult, it is incredibly hard for me to go to church (which is the same church as yours). I know that people think I am inactive because I don’t show up or because I leave after the sacrament, but I get so overstimulated by all of the people who are there. If I stay too long I will start crying. It’s a constant struggle for me to balance my autism and my attendance.
Well, you just do the best you can, and that’s great! ❤️ Have you found any things that help you more than others? Or certain triggers that make it harder?
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I would definitely not be offended if you cried, but I’d be glad to sit with you in a quieter room…
Is there not anyone else who would?
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I really love the way you are taking care of your autistic children. This is so beautiful they can be yourself this is so nice. I have adhd, NLD and asd. I always loved to go to church but I 'm working in shifts and most of the time on sunday, so I can't go anymore. But I really loved it, it really calmed me.
Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️
I feel like God popped this up on my feed. I haven't been to church because my 10 year old son is severely autistic. I long for a church family so bad.
Well, you’re welcome at our church. 😊. I hope you can find a good congregation near you. There are some bad apples in every group of people, but for the most part people are very understanding. And for those who are not, we just learn to, not care. 😊 Hopefully, as the word gets out more about autism people will also be more understanding.
You are not alone! My son is 10. We moved 6 years ago from our church and we had nightmare situations looking. We simply took turns outside with our child. I hurt to have a church family again. My child is severe and having no voice, I’m scared to death. You are so not alone! Love to you!❤
Sorry it's been so difficult. I hope things get better. You could reach out to local communities, saying you are looking for a church where special needs children are welcomed. (just an idea) I have no idea where you live. It would all depend on the local community. Where do you live? We could help you look for one. ❤️
@@7Aheadfamily You are so kind! We live in the mountains of NC. I was really just sharing in the frustration and how it can be so difficult. We were just told of a ministry by our barber that have just started a special needs ministry. Thank you for being so kind!
I'm autistic and the church that I go to has a very high percentage of autistic people! It's great 😊
Wow! That is great
Im autistic and I'm soon going to be 21 years old my mammy owns a church I love being there my favorite song I fly away 😊
That’s so awesome! Thank you for sharing ❤️
I’m autistic, and I play the guitar on the worship team at my church. We use a wireless in-ear monitor system. This allows me to adjust the volume of individual instruments and voices for my sensory needs in my own headphones. It sounds counterintuitive, but I actually find it easier to manage sensory input when I’m playing with the worship team than when I’m in the congregation because of this. I don’t always make it to church if I’m having a ruff morning (I also have Delayed Sleep-Wake Phase Disorder), but my church is very understanding and adapts well if I was supposed to play that morning and can’t make it. They also keep earplugs in the back for anyone who might need them.
That’s awesome! Sounds like a very inclusive and helpful congregation. 😊
Thank you for sharing this video! I have multiple children on the spectrum and church is so hard. This definitely gives me encouragement!
Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️
From what I know, church is one of the most chill place ever, people helps each other and many awesome things can be happen in there
Thank you! ❤️❤️❤️
Y’all are too cute! I think this is the best video you guys have made so far. I love the humor. Sending love to you beautiful people ❤️
Thank you so much!! so glad you are enjoying the channel ❤️.
I believe God lead me to your channel this week. I have found SO MUCH encouragement from your videos, especially this one! My oldest is 3 right now, and just last week at church, he head butted one of the children’s ministry workers. I wasn’t there to see what happened prior to him slamming his head into her face, but I was pretty mortified. I skipped church yesterday because I didn’t want him to hurt anyone again, and I didn’t feel like bringing him into the service with me was an option. Your video proves otherwise. I’m going to try some of the ideas you mentioned here and go to church this Sunday. Thank you for your wisdom and insight!!
Thank you so much for sharing that. ❤️ It means a lot to hear comments like that. Keeps us going. 😊
An obsession with doors seems to be a common thing with autism. My sister and I both went through a stage of doing this when we were younger.
The first time I saw this in a TV documentary/reality tv show was a number of years ago in Autism x6 on the learning channel over a decade ago. The four-year-old in that TV show was nonverbal like Ezra is at that point in time. I read online (I forget where) that sometime later on he learned words like “mama” and “dada” and some other words over the next couple of years. I don’t know where he is now developmentally but last I read it looked like he was beginning to come along both intellectually and socially.
That’s cool, thank you for sharing ❤️. How long were you interested in doors? and can you remember why?
I also have 5 kids (now aged 17-27) and all on the autism spectrum. I've got three with moderate/mild intellectual disabilities etc and various other co-morbid conditions. I am so pleased to be out the other side of this issue. I do remember the stresses involved when taking the whole tribe anywhere that involved sitting and silence.
We always had a strategy of knowing which kids to not to put next to each other. My husband and I always sat either end of the pew (that way they can't escape). We always sat towards the back (easier to make a quick exit) and it's also a bit less of a sensory issue. (away from speakers and stage lights). I would always let them choose something to bring with them to keep them amused whether it was games, art supplies, books or yes when they were older they used their gameboys and iPads. They are now all quite happy to sit and behave in church and enjoy all aspects of it.
I find it helpful to review the earliest reports of my kids and use it to encourage me that yes there has been progress. Some of the issues that were so all consuming disappeared and I didn't even realise. It's so difficult to notice the improvements when you're so busy just trying to get through the day. My eldest is now a youth/young adults pastor working in the city and loves to preach (public speaking is a hobby) an loves to socialise - never thought that would happen. Two of my other boys are youth leaders and have been so since finishing high school. One of my kids started university at 15 years old (is now in his 8th year of study) hoping to start on a PhD next year.
Wow! Thank you so much for watching and sharing your story. 😊 sounds like we have a lot in common. 😊
I never heard of the levels used before for autism. After Googling, I suppose I would be classified as a level 1. My mother says that whenever she took me to church or a funeral (she went to many as the freelance newspaper reporter for our small town), as a kid growing up, I was usually very quiet and sat still, but I know that isn't easy for all kids. I suppose the main thing though is that the Bible tells us that Jesus did NOT reject children and said, "... ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of heaven belongs.'"(Matthew 19:14, NRSV)
Actually the Autistic community (Autistic people, not Neurotypical parents with Autistic children) doesn't use functioning labels. We talk about the support needs of the individual. So you and I are Autistic adults with low support needs. Because our ability to function changes all the time depending on our sensory input and if our social battery is drained. Neurotypicals actually get their batteries charged by talking to people - they NEED to talk to people. Autistic people have their batteries drained by talking to people. So we have to be careful to make sure that we don't waste our energy on interactions that aren't worth draining our energy. This is why we get so frustrated by small talk.
And even Neurotypical can be like that as well, introverted people. That’s how Adam is. 😊
Thank you for watching and commenting ❤️
Yes, my mum took me and my brother to church and she didn't stop because we got diagnosed with autism. She raised us in a Christian home and I'm now 24 and a Christian.
That’s awesome. Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️
One mistake that my parents made was to not allow stimming in church and other public settings. This caused both my sister and I to have more public meltdowns than might have occurred otherwise when we were growing up. This actually happened more with me than with my sister because she is level one and doesn’t have as many sensory sensitivities as I do.
They did not allow stimming because they consider it to be both socially inappropriate and potentially dangerous in any form. For example, one of my relatives views any form of arm waving stim as a form of assault (if not battery).
Maybe you can address this misconception in a future video about myths and misconceptions about autism.
Agreed yeah, I think we kind of went over that in this video…
"Autistic Stimming is it Like a Cigarette" - CZcams Commenter
czcams.com/video/ezImTvw-Sog/video.html
And this one…Why My Autistic Little Guys Love Stimming | Mild & Severe Autism
czcams.com/video/5cXNion5WwM/video.html
And this one…12 Examples of Autism Stimming
czcams.com/video/DYVI8YxEL0k/video.html
It’s some thing that could definitely be addressed again though, we are thinking about doing a masking video as well. Kind of on this topic.
Thanks for sharing about what helps your kids at church! Great ideas! I love Simon’s singing!
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Firstly, happy new year to y’all. Secondly, happy 8th birthday to young Ezra. Thirdly, this is a great video again. You never sugarcoat autism and you always acknowledge that autism affects everyone differently, hence the spectrum. That is a really important message to keep delivering. Thanks for keeping it real. 26k subs now! That is awesome! I have really enjoyed seeing your channel grow. Btw, did you ever invest in the GPS tracker for Ezra? I mention this as when he was outside the church and went down the steps, it kinda reminded me of when he ran away so quick it took a little time to locate him. God bless y’all.
Thank you! Yes, we do have a Apple key tag now, we need to use it more though it’s just hard to keep it on. 😊
I am so grateful for you and your family sharing your experiences. Thank you!!! Your videos are validating and educational. I’m learning so much and no longer feel alone.
You are so welcome, thank you so much for watching and commenting. ❤️
We don’t want anyone to feel alone! Without a community, that can be an easy thing to feel.
I have a brother with severe autism and all he does is run back and forth on his tiptoes, and he cuts letters out. My family is members of Jesus Christ of Ladder Saints and we bring him to church sometimes. All he does at church is stay outside of the chapel and open and closes doors. I was also diagnosed with moderate autism so your videos help me get to know more about what runs in our family!
Thank you for sharing! Do you live in America?
I really like this video. I have a really hard time going to church. I have a big faith and pray and just sometimes go sit when the church is empty. I get overstimulated by the proximity of the people around me, the amount of people in the church, and it feels loud. My mom had high expectations when I was a kid undiagnosed with autism at church so it feels like a negative thing when I’m with my family. I’ve tried just standing in the back hallway sometimes but get weird looks when I stim. Even if some people understand autism, Sometimes I feel like people forget that autistic kids grow up into autistic adults who still need to stim.
So true! Yes, we are hoping that more people can become aware of how important it is for individuals to be able to stim, and not be looked down upon.
@@7AheadfamilyI really appreciate all you guys do, sharing your families experience and educating about autism
Thank you ❤️ we appreciate you commenting and watching. 😊
Great video. I have also have autism too more on the mild side. I honestly personally like to go to Sunday school for special needs kids bc when I go into big church and I have a hard time and sometimes i have a hard time staying awake
Thank you for sharing. ❤️
I feel like a lot of people view stimming as a negative behavior and try using behavior modification using forms of punishment. That is not going to help and you are correct to say it can damage your relationship with your child by punishing the behavior.
Agreed! Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️.
You're very welcome!!❤️🤗
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I agree with you . I let my daughter stim in whatever way she wants. That's why I won't do aba therapy they stop them from stimming or try to "normalize" them to fit in and I think that's wrong . Society should learn people are all different. Emmalina climbs and doesn't sit still so I haven't been to church lolz
Yeah, your ABA therapist should just work on what you want. If not, you should definitely find someone else.
Also wanted to mention that nowadays many churches have really fun and engaging areas for children to go. They often times have no screens, play games (similar to Sunday school style) and all engaging fun just in case you feel sitting quiet for an hour is simply too much for your child❤
Thank you❤😊
Sweetheart, I’m proud of you making taking your children to choice. You are doing a great job and don’t let anyone’s words offend you. It’s only words and you know best!
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My church gave me, my husband and autistic son reserved seats in the back which we need just on case.I appreciate that.
That’s awesome!
Lovely video, especially Simon singing, I am no longer able to go to the Sunday service because my overall health is not good enough to do that. When younger and weller I didn’t know that I had Autism, I found all the noise and people at church to much but I still went because I enjoyed it, I used to where a neck scarf and I would constantly fiddle with that, at the time I didn’t understand why it helped now after being diagnosed I do. I have a small group of people from to church one to my house for a ‘small group’ it’s a good way of fellowship.
I think if I was Ezra I’d have done the same thing, she was invading his space and was being very very rude. But it must have been a shock for you, you are right you do what you do, taking all your children to church and enabling them to enjoy and cope with it in their ways. People need to learn we are not all alike. Why shouldn’t Autistic people able to go to church and worship God in their own way.
I love the Lord and I don’t and have never fitted the ‘normal’ way of ‘doing’ church, but the Lord loves me and accepts me as I am, after all He made me and made me how I am. Thank you for your video.
Agreed! Thank you so much for watching and commenting. Appreciate hearing your experience and story.
I also had an illustrated bible for kids when I was younger. I remember it had Noah’s Ark and some other key stories in it.
That was back in the 1970s and 1980s so it’s probably not the same one that kids use today.
That’s so cool. Thank you for sharing. ❤️
I have level 1 autism and adhd. I like to bring a journal and a pencil so I can draw and keep my hands busy.
Such a good idea!
What type of things do you draw?
I think you guys do a wonderful job loving your kids how they are it's alot better than judging love watching you guys
Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️❤️❤️
Np
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My 15 year old with autism doesn’t handle the amount of people at church. We let her sit on the floor between the benches so she can’t see everyone. And her young woman’s group now brings a blanket to go over the table for her to sit under. She likes hearing the messages just can’t take that much stimulation.
That is so awesome that her young woman’s group help her out with accommodations ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing ❤️
Isn’t leaving her home an option? Idk, just seems like a lot of work for an hour of church, isn’t it kind of an inconvenience and distraction to other parishioners?🤷🏻♀️
@@Danisha-rn2yj absolutely she makes the choice when she is up to it and wants to go. She goes maybe once a month.
I can definitely see that side of things, but it’s also an opportunity to serve and love as Jesus would. I don’t think Jesus would tell anyone to stay home.
I am sick of dad trying to make me Normal and I Independent. Dad refuse to follow medical orders. I need help with getting out of dads care and abuse.
Dad cause me to act up so he can play victim. He knows how to get me upset with something because I don't understand social cues and I don't understand what to expect and help me.
I do not want the behavior issues because I don't understand things and not able to care for myself. I don't want dad to care for me anymore. He knows how to get me response to him the way he wants. I don't like how he confuses me and frustration me for ask for help or to talk to him. Even when he ask me for something or talks to me, he then mistreat me. It is so hard.
I DON'T understand social cues to know someone feels or body language.
I don't understand what is said well. So talk about things others want to talk about is hard.
Show interests and talk about other people and to show interest is so hard.
Not understanding when or what to expect is so confused for me. Causes me anxiety and frustration.
To ask dad to clear up what to expect or what he said or is doing he fights me on and confuses me. He doesn't repeat things to help me understand. I have auditory processing disorder and visual processing issues. Dad mistreat me for this. Then not know what to do. He hits me. He pushes me. He name calls me. He degrades me. He hurt my ears and eyes. He let's me hit my head. I don't want this anymore. He makes me depressed. He blames me and gets mad at me because I act up because he knows how to do it. I can't help it. It makes me more depressed. I cant handle the abuse and neglect. I want to follow his rules and expectations but he won't help me with the tools to do it.
Dad makes my decision for me. He manages my social security disability benefits on a POA. Dad manage my food stamps. Dad manage my Medicaid and Medicare by and medical and legal decisions because of a POA.
Dad goes to speech therapy and occupational therapist and doctors to make changes to my communication plan and behavior plan.
Dad refuse to follow the things he requests.
I am just looking for a more predictable environment and help me so I can function. I don't understand social cues and what to expect. I need help take a shower and test my sugar and take my pills and diaper changes.
I have sensory issues. I have communication issues. I can repeat things because my autism. People tell me what the dad is doing is neglect and abuse. The things I said is me repeating what professionals have said to me is makes dad my caregiver. Because I can't cook, feed myself, cross the street safely, and care for my medical and personal care needs without help makes me a vulnerable adult.
I am sick of the police make rumors about things that are not true. My adult protective services worker has said it makes it hard for him and the hospital to help me get placed.
I am told legally dads abuse would not be domestic violence because I am in dads costady and care because of my disability. This makes it neglected and abuse and endangering me. I have medical records to show my disability and needs. I have social security records to show the police is not right. I have a court record I could request between me and city of Tonawnda house authority who evoc me because I can't clesn and care for myself.
I am not threatening anyone in a video I will be posting. It is going to be in the discription. I am taking legal action because it's what I want to do and it's the American way to do things in civil and criminal cases. The thing is I am frustrated. I don't know how else to say I have taken and started legal action against the city. Officer Bentley keeps being sent as primary officer know he by law is not allowed to and against department policy. The police department is my only recourse because my caregiver will not follow the behavior intervention plan or communicate plan or medical orders. I repeat what they say and dad mistreated me and confuses me know I don't understand what to expect and when and what is happening around me. This makes the cops think I want my way and throw a fit. The cops allow me to hurt my head, throw out my diapers and pills and have emotional issues form the abuse and neglect of my caregiver and unable to care for myself and they allow me to run away in danger of being hot by a car. The cops have admitted and is on CZcams of plan to have me arrested again for my disability if I get hit by a car. Just like they arrested me using medical orders with my oil defuser and hit my head and jumped up and fall on table all admitted by many cops that is to protect dad from abuse so mom can get the care she needs that dad doesn't do for her too. Mom is in the situation she is in because dad. No one listens to me on this. Just like how many times dad lets mom fall and don't feed her.
I am working on a video that I am not threatening anyone. I am angry because the cops give dad permission to hurt me and neglect me and abuse me physically and emotionally. I have recordings of the cops say it's because of revenge just like the arrest in September 2022 by LT Ulmar. I am not like this. I have civil rights violation and complaints in progress again the police. They are taking revenge because I post videos of the cops make rumors about me.
So sorry to hear you’re going through the struggles. It sounds like you really need to find a trusted caretaker near you that can help. Is there anyone in the school system or anything that can help you out?
Very educational thank u and Happy late Birthday Ezra ❤❤
Thank you!❤️❤️❤️
@@7Aheadfamily ❤️
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@@7Aheadfamily ❤️
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Oh my goodness, Simon singing was so sweet!!!
Right. 😊
I love that too. ❤️
there isn't a human being alive that shouldn't be in church, child or adult. Unless they're intentionally meaning to cause harm or nuisance, which isn't the case for autistic children.
So true ❤️. Thank you for sharing and watching.
Happy late eighth bday Ezra! I hope you had a great bday and remember it for many years to come 😁☺
I’ve never been to church myself but I know ppl that go to church. There are several churches near where I live as I’m located in the Bible Belt of the States. It’s very hard for me to stay still (I’ve had this problem for years) so it would probably be hard for me to sit still in one place for an entire hour.
Thank you! Yes, sitting for an hour can be challenging for sure. 😊
As an adult with autism, worship style has a big impact on how stimulated I get at church. I’ve always gravitated toward the consistent, well-ordered, and contemplative nature of liturgical worship, to the point of obsessive-compulsive indulgence if I don’t keep myself in check.
Thank you for commenting❤️
I recognise that hymn book! Fellow member from the UK here. Our son is high functioning. He manages church well but he has a blanket and a small bag teddies that he takes under the bench after the sacrament has been passed. We had comments, but he quietly goes under there and we don’t hear from him until the end. So it works for him. But the comments from others can be hard to navigate.
Thank you for sharing! We appreciate you!🩷🩵🩷
I love 💕 what you guys do to help stimulate your autistic children 👦 at church ⛪️ God bless you & your family. I understand that we need to respect ✊ our elders. However she shouldn’t have done that with another persons child. I have been in plenty of ⛪️ through out my life. People walk away from God & church ⛪️ because of religious people who expect children especially to sit and be quiet 🤫 which for an autistic child 👦 is not going to happen 🙅♀️ and that needs to be accepted
So true! Thank you for watching and sharing ❤️.
If autistic kids won’t sit still and be quiet, can’t you leave them home? When my normal kids were that age I wouldn’t bring them bcoz I knew it bothered other people that came to church to hear the sermon and not have to listen to somebody’s kids screaming and being distracting. There are other options you know.🤷🏻♀️
Yeah, I think that’s personal decision. If our kids get too noisy, we do take them out, but a lot of the time they do well, and we’re grateful to have them in there and to be able to participate.
I had homechurch with my son, because Church was abusive and they abused my son. They also abused and persecuted me,all because God gave me His witness and a message, but we also had a horrible situation, that God continues to brings us out from. So I entered into the two or more witness of God. Where the two or more are gathered. Lord Jesus Christ gave us remission and the remission of sin ministery, along with other things. He used my son as a child in ministery. My son retired from it in his teens. We had one of the worst cases to deal with, so the specialst said in front of my son, and then my son reminds me, when he doesn't want to do something. I am my son's carer and I am also disabled...God raised us up for the disabled among other things. Together we have so many internal disabilities to deal with, but we are also in remission. No one can tell us what that is, we have to learn. God used my son, to bring forth what was needed for people and families with the incurable and things like Autism, and things that people haven't even heard of. My focus is on preparing to leave the earth, getting my son into a life, he can live without me, but dependent and reliant upon God, because no one is going to help him, and it is that simple. The church or the place called church, don't want to hear about our witness. Don't want to hear about remission, or remission of sin. So we don't go to a place called the church we are the church, we are at home, where we want to be, and my son still has his faith, despite the place and people that call themselves the church but are not. Also that place closed down, because God closed it down, but it also does not cater for our disabilities, and we are not going to make it either.
Wow, sounds like you’ve been through a lot. Thank you for sharing. I hope you can find a more accepting congregation.
I've learned a lot about autism thru following those with kids ,to me they are sweet but like rhe rest of us need space . The lady should have spoke to yall first. Your kids are beautiful and blessed by Jesus ❤❤❤
Thank you ❤️
Your videos help me with my kid a lot! ❤
That's awesome! Thank you so so much for watching and sharing that with us ❤️
Well one option for all the young ones attending Sunday School.
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My husband insisted we attend church so I asked God to please help me as my child had frequent meltdowns regardless of wherever we were. God answered my prayers and has helped us get through each day. Most of our church seem to adore my autistic child and they've been very kind and supportive. But there are some who are not comfortable around him and i usually give them space and give my child space so he feels at ease. In time they will get used to him.
Thank you so much for sharing that ❤️. Yes, there are understanding people, and those who don’t pretty much everywhere you go. 😊
@@7Aheadfamily ❤
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When I was around two or three years old I liked toy cars and my parents would let me bring several of them to church. This usually helped keep me involved in an activity when I was there. The main problem with this was that the toy cars would sometimes roll onto to floor and under the pews in front of me.
If someone in front of me didn’t notice the toy car it would get left behind. At this point I knew some words but I wasn’t really communicating yet. By today’s standards I was most likely level two at that point. There is only so much that you can communicate if you only know certain words like “cat”, “clock”, and “moon”, and maybe one or two other words at a specific age.
Therefore what would happen is that my parents would notice that I was crying some time after the Mass was over. Eventually my parents would go back to the church after they heard me crying and noticed that one or more of my toy cars was missing. Usually one of the ushers or another member of the staff would find it and I would get it back.
By the time I was about four my parents would let me bring only one toy car to church and make sure that I had it with me when I left to avoid this situation.
By age five I was considered to be too old to bring a toy car to church and sensory overstimulation (especially the sound of the singing and the church organ) became an issue once again.
Thank you for sharing, yeah we’ve lost a lot of toys and cords I think at church. 😊 What did you end up doing after age of five to help out?
@@7Aheadfamily I eventually started counting the number of windows and other object in the church in order to occupy myself (when I remembered to do so). My mother taught me how to do this. She also does this but from what she has told me she usually does it out of boredom during unusually long sermons.
I would also look at some of the song books in order to occupy myself.
None of this worked perfectly and from time to time sensory meltdowns would still occur. One time I had a meltdown (including crying) because I have perfect pitch and I couldn’t ignore the fact that the church organ was out of tune. This resulted in a visit to the mother’s room (which my parents disparagingly referred to as “the crying room”). I think I was at least eight years old when this happened (if not nine or ten). After Mass my parents told me that it was a very serious sin (if not a mortal sin) to intentionally embarrass them like this.
This was back in the 1980s when even doctors didn’t know what sensory meltdowns were yet.
Wow, you have been through a lot. Thank you so much for sharing your story ❤️. Yes I think people are definitely more understanding now. That’s so interesting that the piano or Oregon being off tune is what was troubling you 😊
It’s stuff like that, that I would never even think of that might be bothering Ezra.
Even as an adult (well into my 20s) I would still carry pens the way Ezra sometimes does and I can confirm that it relieves stress.
It’s also something that a few students in my study abroad program in France in the late 1990s commented on and sometimes laughed about. I eventually (mostly) stopped doing this but not before I ended up being listed as “most organized” in the year book during the first semester.
During the second semester when I limited the number of pens that I carried at one time to about four or five the other students who were there for two semesters instead of one still commented on this. When I was asked about why I did this I would say that I was carrying extra pens in case some of them ran out of ink and that was actually part of the reason that I carried them but not the whole reason and looking back I think everyone probably knew that.
One student who was majoring in psychology asked me during the second semester program if I have OCD. I told her that no I don’t have that (because I have not been diagnosed with OCD). I did not mention being on the spectrum (Originally level two but by that time I was level one (and I’m still level one)) because back then I was not talking about it (for two reasons (The first reason was embarrassment (My ability to feel embarrassed started working at age nine (one year older than Ezra’s current age)) and (the second reason was) I hoped that it would go away if I put enough effort into masking. Back then some people (including some doctors and psychologists) still thought that “mild autism” or even “moderate autism” could go away at or before age thirty (or even twenty, in some instances) if a person spends enough time socializing with neurotypical people, doesn’t mention the diagnosis to others, and actively suppressing the symptoms. In the last decade or so that was found to not be the case. Now (in my late 40s) I can confirm that it’s still there no matter how much I may choose to mask in a given situation (such as shopping or sitting in a restaurant waiting for a meal).
Thank you for sharing with us!❤❤❤
Your sons singing is beautiful.😊😊
Thanks! I love hearing him sing
You guys should do a video on how you knew Ezra has OCD in addition to Autism and explain what getting his OCD diagnosis was like as well as his OCD traits. Maybe you could also do a video on signs your child has both Autism and OCD.
Very good ideas! We will put that on the list. 😊
We have 2 autistic kids in our church ages 5 and 3,both boys from different families. The 5 year old is starting to be able to sit in kids classes a little better after 1 year of adjusting (we have a preschool SS class and Kids Church on Sunday morning's and Patch the Pirate Club on Wednesday night's) but has a hard time like any autistic kid sitting still for a long period of time unless he has something or someone engage with him. He sits in church on Sunday nights and on special occasions but his parents let him sleep in service because he won't take a nap on Sunday afternoon and when he is awake,he's allowed to color in service. The 3 year old is in the process of training to sit in service and kid's classes but gets overwhelmed easily,so his parents are working with him on that. Yes, these boys do have tantrums when they get mad and stem a lot,but they are still cute and precious.
Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️
I know it may seem strange but I’m glad he punched that Karen in the face. She had no right to tell him to sit/settle down. I’m on the spectrum as well and absolutely adore church. I love to sing and worship God with every fiber of my being. Only thing that sets me on edge is when my favorite pastor isn’t there. I can’t concentrate on the sermon because my mind is like a broken record wondering where Pastor Pete is. And when anything isn’t how the routine should be I get real angry. Last Sunday they didn’t do communion because there was a guest speaker. I couldn’t concentrate on the sermon because my mind was going “Uh, communion. I’m not happy.” I even went up to Pastor Pete and said to him ”Hey man. Aren’t we forgetting something that starts with a c?”
So glad you have a great experience with Church. Thank you for sharing ❤️
Happy birthday Ezra!!!
Thank you! Appreciate it Nathan. ❤️
Ezra’s obsession with doors (which I also had when I was his age or possibly slightly younger (maybe as young as age six)) might be a symptom of either autism or OCD. Maybe you can cover more about how the symptoms are differentiated especially if someone may have both in your upcoming video on the topic.
Many people don’t know much about OCD. In the last twenty years many people have only become aware of OCD as a result of watching the character Adrian Monk on Monk. It’s interesting to note that Monk’s specific diagnosis does not seem to be mentioned in the actual series but the marketing materials for the show and the DVD packaging pretty much confirm that Monk is supposed to have OCD.
Thank you for sharing your insights with us!😊😊😊
Thank you so much for sharing this 🙏🏾
You are so welcome. ❤️❤️
Autistic,developmentally challenged… it’s difficult to find acceptance.
I’ve made few friends, because my son is different, but those with whom I’m close are real friends - because of my son.
I wouldn’t trade him for the world!
So true! Thank you so much for watching and sharing❤️.
In church the smell of incense often bothers me. For me this is a result of both sensory sensitivities and allergies.
Thank you for sharing. ❤️
It seems like the scenario of people not minding their own business when it comes to how other people’s kids are behaving like you describe here is fairly common. For example, Animaniacs has a very memorable episode (I think it was titled Bumbee’s Mom) where Skippy starts crying while watching a movie that is similar to Bambi and an older character is not able to mind her own business. His aunt (named Slappy in the episode because she was in some cartoons with slapstick comedy (it makes sense in context)) gave a pretty funny response to the other character who was complaining about Skippy’s behavior.
Animaniacs was produced by Steven Spielberg who (from what I’ve read) is on the spectrum. In the back of my mind I wonder if any episodes of Animaniacs (for example) might be loosely based off of some of Spielberg’s own experiences either during childhood or later. I suppose only he knows for certain.
Thank you for sharing your observations!💜💜💜
God Bless You, 7-Ahead !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aww, thank you!🩷🩷🩷
We were taught church is a holy place and never misbehave
True. I teach my kids too. There is a difference between misbehaving and being a child who is trying to be good but is making sounds because he is Autistic. I believe Church should be for everyone and no one should be told to leave if they are wanting to be there to worship, then let them.
Well done friends 🤩 I'm glad to see you teaching your children that Church is important, and you are teaching the Church that folks with disabilities are important 🩷
My worst experience in public was while we were walking out of Walmart. Right as we got to the crosswalk area, a Harley rider was cruising by and he “racked his pipes”. It scared my son so bad that he instantly bolted, right in front of the Harley riders path!!! I almost had a heart attack. I was running to catch my son, worried that the Harley was going to wreck, and just in utter panic.
Thankfully we made it safely to the car and left.
Looking back, I should have found the man and truly given him an education on not only autistic sensory needs but also in public etiquette! Who does that right in front of a store entrance?! Right in the middle of the crowd?!
Wow! That one is dangerous and scary too.
Thank you for watching and sharing ❤️
my church is very small (30-50 people), we have 10 children and 2 babies 4 of the children are diagnosed with asd's one girl is clearly on the spectrum, but high masking(her brothers and parents are on the spectrum), it can get quite loud sometimes, but as the 50/50 also applies to the adults, we are all fine with it. children have a sunday school, where there is a physical activity. it really is the most welcoming place i have ever found and feel absolutly no need to mask there.
That’s awesome! Sounds like an awesome church. 😊
yes, it is really good and happens to be the only one i can walk to (20min walk). i have an adhd friend, whose family are all spectrum, round the corner, that started a couple of months before me. we usally go together. i am adhd and probiably autistic too. i have never felt the need to be not myself there, someone i have felt i had to keep hidden for my whole life. people try to understand the word salad, asking appropriate questions@@7Aheadfamily
Thank you for sharing. That sounds amazing!❤️
Some years ago (I think in the late 2000s) my father was talking about the subject of discipline (It was after he saw someone’s kids misbehaving in church one Sunday.) and he said that instant punishment after a behavior does help with stopping a behavior. For example (he claimed) instant punishment helped him to stop swearing when he was a kid (back in the 1950s).
Then less than five minutes later he used a four-letter word himself. (This happened that day after we went to church, then lunch, and eventually had dinner at home.) My sister and I both noticed this and my sister pointed out that the word that he just used was “a bad word”. Right after that he claimed that that “has nothing to do with anything” and then said that he only started using those words again as an adult. That’s technically possible but both my sister and I have some doubts about that.
Thank you for sharing❤
Whenever my sister and I would stim or have sensory meltdowns my parents would assume that we were doing it for attention or worse in order to deliberately embarrass them.
I don’t know for certain what my sister’s motivations were but in my case I know for a fact that I was not intentionally embarrassing them because these behaviors started happening before I began to experience embarrassment myself. Being almost certainly level two when I was younger I only began to experience embarrassment around age nine and my ability to feel embarrassed didn’t work anywhere near consistently until at least age ten. Therefore at that point in time it would not have been possible to subject the family to this intentionally.
Thank you for sharing this, we will maybe use this in our masking video if that’s OK ❤️
Thank you for sharing this, we will maybe use this in our masking video if that’s OK ❤️
Ezra punched an old Karen 😂 good job buddy😂😂😂
😊
@@7AheadfamilyReal nice, encouraging your child to put his hands on an elderly lady. Your child would have issues even if he wasn’t abnormal. Maybe you should keep a tighter grip on his dog leash 🤷🏻♀️
You’re right, definitely should not encourage that. She crossed some boundaries as well, but that’s no excuse either.
We go on a Wednesday to the Stambourne chapple care group we are a small rural village in England we have two churches but one is only open once every 6 weeks its the loud music we cant stand our worship is through doing like collecting food n stuff for charities I cant remember the verse but god said it does not matter what you do as long as you do it for me
Love that! Thank you for sharing ❤️
I really hope that as both grow older other kids in the church are accepting and they can make some friends. Simon is funny and I think he will be fine but Ezra getting invited to things would really help him.
So true! Yes, Ezra ‘s little class is very patient with him thankfully. 😊
@@7Aheadfamily hopefully he can build friendships he's very adventurous
Agreed! We need to start doing more things with peers I believe. ❤️
Thanks for sharing!!
You bet. Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️
Why is this even a question? Church people should accept others.
Right 😊
Mark 10:13-16. People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.
I just wanted to say that if you are a Christian, and you have a problem with an autistic child or any child for that matter in church, you aren't a christian. 🤷 If your pious mumblings being interrupted by a child upsets you, perhaps you being at church is more about your ego than God🤷
Well said. Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️
9:38 and I experienced something similar once, not by an elderly person, but by another kid at the ABA center I was located at at the time. I was 6-7 around the time and another boy (likely needed more support than me) kicked me in the back pretty hard. I had to go over to my friend’s house (who is also autistic like I am) and his mom put a big bandaid (like a square beige one) on the mark. Not to mention at the end of the year I also slammed onto the sidewalk at my school and skinned my knee very badly, I was left with a bruise for a good while (this was the summer before I went into second grade)
Wow, thank you for sharing. ❤️
And thanks for being a member of our channel ❤️
When my daughter was 2yo she was walking around the foyer before church. Being a normal 2yo and some kid came up and hit her on the top of the head (she had a plastic clip holding her hair.) She started crying (the kid was twice her size or more) I picked her up and took her to the bathroom. When she was calm I walked back out. A few people asked if she was OK but the kids family didn't they just gave me mean looks. Later I found out he had asd or something similar. I was like any parent upset with the kid, but I know some kids are like that. What made me livid was that the parent or guardian didn't check on her, but gave me dirty looks. The parent didn't say anything to the child even a calm that's not nice.
Thank you for sharing❤️
I say if they’re very disruptive during the sermon, no.
6:06 I wouldn’t allow him to play with the doors. I’m a greeter at my church and that area where people come in, the walk way needs to be clear.
I’m an aspergers autism adult and don’t have kids
Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️
Thanks for supporting The Chosen
Love The Chosen!
Yikes! I think you may both want to see what Doctor Voddie Baucham has to say about the Chosen, it will open your Eyes!...the fact the Chosen is a Gross Violation of the Second Commandment is actually the least of its issues!
Please Return to your Bibles (ESV recommended for those who Struggle with the Jacobean used in the KJV) and see just how badly the Chosen, which is Propaganda for the Non-Christian Mormon Cult, Twists Scripture into something utterly Unrecognisable, and both adds to, and removes from, Scripture in Direct Defiance of Revelation Chapter 22.
God's Blessings, Love and Peace.
How much of the chosen have you watched?
@@7Aheadfamily I have watched all three and every thing in between. Eagerly awaiting waiting for the fourth . I will live stream that.
Right! It is so good.😊
I am Autistic I going to church on Saturday or Sunday my mom and dad I am young I have time to go to church but now to church no problem
Thank you for sharing your story!❤️😊❤️
Yes I taught a boy with autism in Sunday he was medium functioning and we have another kid that's 10 he has autism of some kind and comes sometimes he wasn't there today but he does come
So glad you help them out ❤️
Awesome!
@@7Aheadfamily now this year they come to my class for crafts and once a month on a Sunday night I have a Bible study for kids we have a lesson bible skills crafts games snacks and other activities we are on the book of Joshua
That’s so awesome! Sounds amazing. 😊
@@7Aheadfamily another person in Sunday school teaches kids the lesson they have a 15 minute lesson and 15 minutes for crafts and activities but next church year I will teach elementary class every other week or ask if I can and have a craft class every other week
it important to remember that just because a child is doing something you don't like doesn't necessarily mean they are being naughty i went to a church that had a lot of little kids one Sunday they were being rowdy the dad look so defeated my very shy sister Gwen went to talk to him then he looked so relieved i asked her about it she goes THE HOLY SPIRIT IS A SUGAR RUSH BUT KIDS ARE TOLD TO SET QUIETLY SO THE PARENTS CAN SING AND DANCE. Gwen know what it was like to be in trouble for making to much noise when she was little she was always in trouble for taking to much or being noisy there was a reason for it but they didnt not it at the time but when i sew her quietly setting i asked her what she was doing she was listening to the box fan tuns out she had tinnitus silence was physically painful for her thankfully we figured it out early we did homeshooling her concentration improved once she had a fan on. now she take her battery fan with her to church they don't mind
Thank you so much for sharing. ❤️
As a Mormon just like u I hated going to church because it ain't fun eventually I stop going to church all together because I'm afraid of judgment from other people and because I have trauma from going to church when I was a little kid because they want to separate me from my mom and I got traumatized by it
Sorry you went through that❤❤ Lots of love from us here at 7-Ahead❤❤
My church's "slogan" if you can call it that is "this is a place of grace", and I think they do well with extending that grace to people with disabilities (Alice Drive Baptist Church, Sumter, SC). They also have a class for kids of various ages with various disabilities called the "buddies" class. I think you've come up with some good accommodations for your sons at church as well! Unfortunately, some people (usually older generations) aren't as educated about autism, although that did not justify the 90 yr old woman reprimanding Ezra like that!
That is so wonderful that your church has programs like that. I think they’re very important to help be inclusive for everyone. And yes, we have run into other older generations being upset with Ezra‘s behavior. Just two weeks after making this video we had another incident where some people at our church came up to us and told us that Ezra shouldn’t be at church because he’s too wild and loud. It was quite interesting 😊
I used to bring books.
Nice! That’s a good strategy. 😊
*#HappiestEighth B-B-B-B-BDayEZRA!
YOU ARE BELOVED.😊🎉❤
🙏 thank you ❤️
My worst experience was when my autistic son(was17at the time) had a bad meltdown in Wal-Mart and knocked me down three times. People stared and i hated that. He six feet tall. I'm scared of him because happened other times too. He has knocked other people down too. Othe times he well grab arm and bite. He servere autistic. I love him too the moon back though. I honestly wish though that he not so tall. He is a happy person, just he have those meltdowns that comes on unexpected.
Wow, yeah that’s very difficult. I hope Ezra stays small. 😊
I think Ezra would like to have friends at church. I used to try to make friends at church but it was hard because I have autism.
Thank you for watching and commenting ❤️
Thanks for sharing.
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Awesome video.....
Thank you so much for sharing. 😊
This level 1 autistic LOVES God. Since I was first told about him at age 5. I go to a rather boisterous kind of church, and nobody much minds the barefoot guy bouncing around behind the rows of chairs on the left side😉 I have a cute picture somebody took of me.
That’s awesome! Ezra often ends up with no shoes as well. 😊
@@7Aheadfamily Ezra is not 65 years old😉
😂 Yes, that would make it a little more conspicuous.
But wonderful in our book all the same. 😊
Church is hard for my son some Sundays! We just found out that my son has autism this week!
Wow, thank you for sharing. ❤️
We are here for you❤️. How old is your son?
He is 6! I feel overwhelmed at the moment. Transition from one activity to the next is hard for him.
Yes, transitions are tough for our kids as well. Thanks for being here, hope you can find some useful things from the channel.
I get it I have a learning delay
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Also happy birthday to Ezra
Thank you!
How is that even a queston. If a church doesnt want all the children to attend, you need to fimd another church. I can think of nothing more unbiblical than to turn away a child from the nurture and admonition of The Lord.
So true
My worst experience at church? More like my mom's worst experience in church. Because of my actions. No excuses! So what happened is one Sunday night me and my mother were at church. And I was nine years old. So that night I was in a mischievous mood. So that night I randomly was hitting and kicking my mother in church. I was also being loud and laughing in the middle of service. Now I knew perfectly well what I was doing and I knew it was wrong but I did it anyway. It was so bad that one lady took me down stairs and had a talk with me about my actions. Was it ok to act like that? absolutely not! Will I do that again? Never! However my worst experience at church was a few years ago. Everyone at church was doing praise and worship until around two hours later and suddenly a friend of ours had collapsed on the floor and had a heart attack. The Pete metics tried to do the best they could to save her but unfortunately she had no pulse and at the hospital it was confirmed that she had passed away from the heart attack. But there is something unusual I don't know. Another person passed away in the parking lot as she had trouble breathing and multiple times I had seen ambulances come in during the middle of church from random seizures. I witnessed two of them. One minute everything is fine and the next minute something bad had happened. So I don't know what to think about it all I know is to me it's a stranded situation.
Wow, thank you for sharing ❤️
Hi, I have been viewing your channel quite often. It's very informative. I have a daughter who has autism. Have you tried FMA method for your sons? If yes, please explain did you see improvements?
We have heard of Music therapy and FMA but haven't tried it yet. We are looking into it, even if it just help calm down situations, it could be worth it. Do you have personal experience with it?
@@7Aheadfamily No even we don't have any experience with FMA.
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Mijn kleinzoon heeft dit allemaal gehad🙂..en t is ok😘⚘
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I cant go to church i have really bad anxiety all the time. I am nervous there
Church can be very difficult. I'm sorry.
You do what’s best for your special needs kids your a great mom don’t let negative bother you
Thank you ❤️
Appreciate that
@@7Aheadfamily You’re welcome I have ADHD and know the struggle with a disability
Yes! ADHD can definitely make Church more difficult as well. 😊
@@7Aheadfamily Yeah it was hard for me to sit still for long periods of time
Proverbs 6:12-13
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Sunday School is better for all kinds of children. Church is more for adults.
There's also Sunday School for adults who didn't get confirmed to a church.
Very true. ❤️
What do you guys do in your Sunday school? That is helpful?
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funny video but I don't mean to be rude. I am glad you are so nice
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Emmalina wont walk up and down steps though . She slides down them. It seems emmalinais similar to ezra she doesnt notice things in a moment like hot or cold . Its like they are in the zone and the hot water doesnt register or the cold outside isnt affecting them .
That does sound very familiar. Thank you for sharing ❤️.
Thank your for a great video. Happy new year! Have you and-or your husband ever had any kind of therapy for yourselves after the autism diagnoses?
Yes! We have and it has helped a lot.
I saw the temple on the wall I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints
That is very cool!💜❤️