Jesus was Romanian
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- čas přidán 8. 06. 2024
- Thank you again to @aliantacarpatina for letting me redub & upload this video. Du-te și vezi canalul lui / @aliantacarpatina
Note: This isn't a satire of Jesus nor God, but of the Balkan conspiratorial theories that are quite popular in esoteric tabloids & rural people from the countryside.
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Description: Since ancient times, many have perversely lied about who Jesus was & formed false religions out of it. Today we reveal the ultimate truth, that Jesus in fact was and still is, Dacian.
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🎶Outro Song🎶: • ca$$a loco - living in...
🎶Explained Intro Song🎶: • Dögös Robi...Bomba!
#balkans #jesus #romania - Komedie
Thank you again to @aliantacarpatina for letting me redub & upload this video. Du-te și vezi canalul lui www.youtube.com/@aliantacarpatina
Am sa ma duc sa ii vad canalul lui intradevar
Are you sober?
Hello can You do a video about Romanian CZcams?
When will you make video about istro-Romanians?
While Jesus was not a citizen of Rome (unlike Saint Peter), he was still technically on territory of Rome.
Jesus was Romanian, God is Serbian, but both of them speak Polish. And Jerusalem was taken away from Hungary in Trianon
Have you ever been to Warsaw? The second Main Street is Jerusalem Street. It is a proof that real Jerusalem used to be located just across Vistula river, on the worse, Eastern bank of the river.
Jerusalem used to be in Poland. And next to it is Ordon Fortress, where Ordon suicidally defended against Russians, but so smart he became at the same time suicide hero and he survived. Living hero is even better.
And they all live in Germany
dude this could actually be a your argument is invalid meme
Hungarians had and have a part of of so called Jerusalem pre Trianon era ...and Josephus Flavius Jewnanistani-Jewish-Roman story teller that Hungarian-MacAriz-Scythians where 2000 years ago still in Middle East around Scythiopol to which we add the fact that Ábrám and Úr like many other words-names are Hungarians which as Onoguri was specifically known as Ten Tribes ....points out the fact that if so called Jesus wasn't a Hungarian but a Jews-Jewnanistani-SeaPeople then he would have been a fake Israelites like Jews-Jewnanistani-SeaPeople .
When Christphor Columb first set foot on american soil, the natives greeted him with the traditional "Ce cauți aici țigane ăsta-i pământ românesc".
I once gifted a Hungarian girl a potted flower, I told her that's Romanian soil in it and that she can have it now. She seemed very happy.
Huhhhh Romania
Probably Colombus
Actually, the Americas was just an esoteric mass of gases before the Dacians discovered it and used their anti-gravity tractors to transform it into the landmass you know today.
Prolly the other way around if we're being realistic
@@darkoshadowfury haha so funny ianos, how about you stop living in the cities, and your ngo/political party gets outlawed, and you re only allowed to work the fields from now on, sounds good?
Man passed the final test. He became a true Romanian.
indeed. Romanians mocking other Romanians is very Romanian. except when a hungolian does it.... then, hold the freakin' phone !
@@DacianRider Everyoneone does that. I mean, mocking Romanians. Does it make me a Romanian? Hello from Hungolia! :D
@@dddenes hello ! tell you what, if Fidesz finally goes down in the next election, then YES ! you can join the Romanian chill club.
Bruhh 😂😂😂😐🤔
@@DacianRider guess we will never join the club :D
There's a joke in Serbia...
- Did you know Jesus was Serbian?
- How is that possible when his mother was Jewish?
- By his father...
If you ask Jovan Deretić, his mom was Serbian too
„Jер и бог је србин, небеса су наше“ - Баја Мали Книнџа
@@iiitansx Serbi where a Samarian-Samarit group that appeared in Caucasa including on Caucasian Albanian map and when we talk about Samarian-Samarit they where a Biblical group.Szamár in Hungarian Means Donkey which is why Gospel Greek-Jewish writters wrote the story of Jesus entiring in Jerusalem on a donkey since the expectation was that the Messiah enters-conquers-liberates Jerusalem with Számarian-Samarit just they misinterpreted the actual text assumed that it talks about a donkey rather then a group of people.By the way donkey 🫏 is a symbol according some associated with Biblical tribe Issachar.
Jesus was aryan not jewish.
@@hondacbrification this literally reads like the wild shyte the British Israelists and Black Hebrew Israelites would come up with.
But his mother was Serbian...
And his father a Bulgarian...
They didn't exist at that time sorry😁
@@InAeternumRomaMaterThat's a western lie
@@krunoslavkovacec1842 Nope, more like the truth. Jesus was born in the Roman Empire consequently a Romanian
His father because God is serb
hot water was invented in Sarmizegetusa, little known fact.
it is true, when Caesar was about to to be killed he shouted "Și tu Brutus? Și tu ești maghiar?"
😂😂😂😂
Romanians are romans 2.0 its quite clear
No, no, people misheard him, he was actually asking if Brutus was a „măgar” :-D
I reading the comments before having watched the video and I'm wheezing with laughter right now because, as a Romanian, I understand **everything** 😂😂😂
Bro really wants Romanian/EU citizenship
If he doesn't already have Hungarian/EU citizenship.
Well he just passerd the damn citizenship test.
well that is easily solved in true Balkan tradition, one of us declares themselves whatever the new meme is and marries him, the catch, he has to supply the beer and sometimes food for the whole 3 years, problem solved, eu citizen.
@@mimisor66 Nah, he's a Serb who has settled in Romania (as far as I remember).
You just showed the perfect depiction of the Romanian conspiracist theorist. The vibe was on point.
Not a conspiracy theory, conspiracy theorists are actually smart
@@Alton-
If sarcasm:
“Of course. How else would they figure out so much without those galaxy big brains lol”
else:
“Sure jam, whatever helps you and your family sleep at night.”
Jesus stole our sins 🙏 😔 God bless.
This is hilarious.
He said he comes as thief.
This is somehow so much more logical than "he died for our sins" which never made a lick of sense to me.
What a true Romanian
Calde multumiri pentru aceasta productie, domnule TraindIronicAnEuropa. Zamolxe sa fie cu tine.
Te preamăresc
Să fie primit!
Man the Romanian Orthodox Church be putting this out so Orthodox Moldovans could be convinced back into Romania
Please cum reunite with us moldovan baby 😢
As a Russian reject who now lives in Romania and is learning it's culture, I want to say thank you. This could be a great asset on citizenship history exam. Best material I've seen so far.
Poate cel mai bine primit acum e să spui că Domnul Isus Hristos a fost ucrainean. Îl vei da pe spate pe Marcel covirigarul (Ciolacu)😂👍
Te primim cu drag frate rus.
@@andico6614 🥲. Mulțumesc frate roman.
I will bring mici și Palincă to our next Transcarpathian Alliance meeting. I was there last year, visiting.
@@skyeplusce vorbești ba cu alcolisti invadatori
We Romanians would not have loved Christ so much if he was not one of ours. 😤💪🏿😎
Btw the people that dont know who Zamolzix was. He was the God of the Dacians
Zalmoxis was god of Thracians too I believe.
Zalmoxis or Zalmoxes. I don't know who Zamolzix is, but I suspect he is a gay influencer roaming the social networks of metrosexual hipsters in Bucale and Cluj.
@@aliceinwonderland4395 well i said Dacians . And Dacia was made by tribes of Dacians Thracians and Geto-Dacians
sounds like a character from Asterix
sounds like a villain from a 1970s comic .
As a romanina born in Mexico who has never been in Romania, whose father is an otomi indigenous and whose mother is a sephardic jew from Spain I can confirm that what you say is real and authentic
So, you are not romanian.
Can’t you read? He just said his mother was a Volga Tatar and his father is Berber from Morocco . Clearly he is Romanian
How the hell are you romanian if your father is native american and your mother a spanish jew?
Everyone is Romanian knowingly or unknowningly
The council needs to talk with this guy, he knows too much.
Did you know that the Garden of Eden is also in Romania, near a village called Zarand?! We had a so called "academician" (Teodor Ardelean) with this theory.
As a Romanian, this is so stupid I love it
Best video on youtube.
Gets the romanian seal of approval from me.
You mean the romanian steal of approval
George Washington, better known as Gheorghe Vaşiantonescu was IN FACT a proud Romanian.
De asemenea și George Bush, defapt e Gheorghe Buș.😂
@@kanaldeleo7776 Buşescu*
@@General_Alch Tufă*
This is the only guy on youtube that unites hungarians, romanians and serbians..only because of sheer irony.
Cheers brothers!
As an Israeli it's a great honor
get ready for a lot of "free palestine" comments
@@MR_SpiroFree Israel 🇮🇱🇮🇱☮️✌🏻
@@MR_Spiro nah, most of the Romanians are on Israel side
@@stefanbirlog4622 free israel from what?
@@MR_Spiro Nah, youre in the wrong neighborhood.
as a romanian i have no idea what i just watched, but was funny
Finally, the truth has been spoken. Zalmoxe bless you
Spoken like a true Romanian. You forgot the part that Albert Einstein stole the idea of the laser from Eminescu , but it's a little underground so I'll give a pass.
As a Hungarian, I can confirm this is exactly why we wanted to keep Erdély during trianon.
As a Hungarian you can't confirm shit!
cry more
Jesus gave Transylvania to His people!1!1 🇷🇴🦅
As a hungarian we didn't lose Erdély, jesus just wanted his borrowed land back.
@@countydude8654
Bruh 💀
Finally, the carpathian aliance comes in the spotlight
Carpathian alliance sounds like a discord group/mmo guild.
As a Romanian ,now I am the happiest man on earth
I thought he had a Japanese brother?
😂😂😂😂
No he was chinese and he started the taiping rebellion
@@SuperEone1 Oh in Japan they said he had a brother as well, something with those east asians man they just something else
Chinese man claims he's Jesus's brother
30 million people die
That's just hungarian cope.
Is Satan hungarian then? 🤔
Yes
When you go to hell, you are forced to eat hot paprika
When you go to hell, you are forced to eat kürtős kalács.
@@KartingRules do you also have to listen to Hungarian Mickey all the time
@@Totally_not_alpharius for sure
Hi, I'm from Budapest. Regarding the state of my country, I wouldn't be surprised.
And his name was actually Ionuț
Romanian Jesus broke bread but all in the quest to find copper wiring inside.
FML mate, i need to smoke now and rewatch this, Cheers!!! :))))
Lmao
Unfortunately, some of the humor gets lost in translation. I wonder what non-romanian speakers would think of this.
only the balkans could come with such an outrageous statement
I hate to be that guy but this was just disrespectful. Eat my balls if u think im being soft
Didn't know Jesus had that Dracula drip in his blood
Crazy how this is already more popular than the original
What living in Cluj does to a mf...
Sincer
My first reaction was to call my dealer to congratulate him. This one was awesome! Cheers 😂
made me spill my drink laughing
Great video, with ONE little discrepancy - everyone knows Jesus was Thracian (therefore Bulgarian), not Dacian! I hope you fix it soon!
Next patch, for sure
Wrong, bulgarians are not tracians but romanians are
@@user-eh1eu4ef9c Bulgarians have Thraco-Getic related heritage as well, especially Odryssian but not only. They have Dacian too even from the Scythia Minor inhabitants which were split into Dacians, Scythians and Sarmatians (and obviously Romans and/ or Romanized people) before the arrival of the Slavs and the Bulgars according to Notitia Dignitatum.
@@akuleet6029ottoman*
@@akuleet6029 Bulgarians are a Slavicized Turkic people. They have as much in common with the Thracians as a turkey has with a chicken.
Yes... yes.... you are becoming a true Romanian... let the dac flow through you
The complete silence other than his voice is tripping me out real hard
Thanks for highlighting the favourite past time of Romanians: Pretending that everything and everyone important was/is Romanian. Starting with the Dacians…
This Video is so unhinged, i first thought it was a very old one of yours XD
As a person from Slovakia. We are always taught that god is a Serb. Is that truth?
Also Jesus is Romanian and holy spirit is Hungarian while Archangel Michael like the rest of the 7 archangels are all Slovaks.
No wonder you can't find the true cross anymore. Bro stole it right after resurrection.
This is like schizophrenia but Romanian version.
Well... Romanian original conspiracy theories are fun.
Did you heard that one that the roman, the ones from the Roman Empire, were actually dacians ? And that the roman language is actualy a dacian variant of the language ?
Just woke from those fever dream-ish naps when I saw this, nevertheless I was a bit confused and for a few seconds I was contemplating westher I was still dreaming or actually awake.
Thanks for that...
ma ustura cand ma piș
Te înțeleg
@ZombSly Sunt pe pamant.
Relatable
Living Ironically in Europe goes dada. Next you will be moving to Paris.
It is rarely known that the Buddha gained enlightenment in Romania
😅😅😅
2:18 What's even crazier is the fact that in Greek mantis is called "horsey of Panagia (a colloquial name for Virgin Mary)".
After the Roman retreat from Dacia the Romanians or their ancestors might've not even been North of the Danube until the Avar - Byzantine wars since Nestor's chronicle says that the Slavs settled in Pannonia first (with the Avars later exerting their influence over the Slavs) until the Vlachs conquered and subdued the Slavs but then the Magyars arrived and expelled the Vlachs and settled among the Slavs themselves, subduing them in the process.
Great Vlachia (Thessaly) didn't even appear in Byzantine chronicles until the 10th century and the Magyar conquest was late 9th century and Anonimy Descriptio Europae Orientalis gives the account that the Magyars expelled the Vlachs to Greece, then later 16th and 17th Wallachia and Moldavian chronicles say that the Vlachs moved to current day Romania from Greece although it's hard to pinpoint an exact date.
So starting with the Roman conquest and subsequent retreat this seems to have a been a back and forth and depending on what page you start narrating the story from you'll get entirely different points of views, Hungarians, Greeks and Romanians each narrating starting from different starting points while completely ignoring what came before, what was in between, etc. to build the narratives that suits them best.
My point being that the Romanains ancestors were East Romans too for a while so it won't surprise me if there'll be some of these similarities.
What's the new drug from Campia Turzii you took to make this new vid?
As a former Hungarian i only can say NAH!
His father was an Albanian. His first ancestor was a Hungarian, the one that founded all of the human civilization. All is magyar föld...
As a Romanian, I can only say that all of this is fact
"Im not gonna get too crazy"
Me after 2 pălincă:
As a romanian this is blasphemy. Repent.
If all of these complaints are from Romanians, it proves you are the most Orthodox of Orthodoxy ☦️
@@Hajde_budalla i didnt say it to prove we are better than anyone or anything like that. Its just the Truth.
Also important fact is that Israel anthem was inspired by romanian traditional song, I'm dead serious go and check it for yourself
Thenks for sharing your great knowledge with us. Let's all pull our pants down and trow it back in the name of this ancient science.
I'm romanian and I never heard of this.
In the end...we all know dacians are the creators of all civilisation
Thank you, very educational.
Nah bruh, Jesus was Hungarian, because the hungarians were in Transilvania before the Dacians 😆
Jesus became an honorary Romanian when he turned water into wine 🥂
He stole the water and replaced it with wine
@@rayaan1233 naaah, If he truly is Romanian, he'll steal the wine and replace it with water 🤣
@@alexutzcel 😂
para cuando el "I VISITED ARGENTINA SO YOU DIDNT HAVE TO", argentina is europe too
i hope you dont mind me asking but could you do a video just speaking serbian or do a video about the language like you did with hungarian
Good one!
Birdemic × bible
Király
The word nuns really also means mantis in our leanguge, from what i know mantis are called like this beacuse their hands make them look like they are praying but im not sure if it's right or not
Did you do this video just to flex your new video editing? XD
Bro was cooking with this one
whatever was smoked during making this video, I want some
Worst part is, it was made completely sober while on break at the office
As the face at 10 sec in I can agree that Jesus was Romanian
It is more real than the Macedonian history
That is factually true.
That right here was the best video I’ve seen in years on CZcams
*Tactical Insults on Hun…nah never mind, just be peacefull ‘round here… love the Balkans
Still, this makes more sense than Alex Jones
4:00 ......and that's the Kilian Experience, I guess
He stole the cross he was nailed to
Only took madlad 3 days
Where the fuck did this idea for the video come from? Zalmoxe bless you.
This video was unapolagetically poetic
I want to show this video to my mom.
one hell of an acid trip...without the acid
Hell naw if Jesus was Romanian then Muhmmad was probably from Latvia I can proove it because I have seen his face 😅
You have forgaten about the tunels that conect all the charpatians with the pyramids and off course that go under the jerusalem.
I've started telling Brits that the Tudors were Romanian.
And it makes sense! xD
I'm romanian and I'm confused. Great video.
Well, we have female King Arthur. So why not Romanian Jesus?
Dude I can’t tell if he’s Romanian or not all them references 😂😂😂😂 so on point (doamne ferește)
The priest at 2:20 looks like a western catholic priest, which I doubt we'd see in Romania, which is dominated by eastern orthodoxy
Just wanted to point that out
Make a video about Decebal and the history of Dacia
As a Fellow Romanian that is true
What in the fever dream..
From a fellow Romanian, descendant of Jesus, how high were u when making this?
This video is such a lie, we all know he was Hungarian.
If hes Hungarian why does Romania have transylvania?
@@deciboo189 buuuuuurn
All hail the Karpathian Alliance!
Jesus was a gnome from the streets of Belgrade