The biggest mistake of my 20s.
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- čas přidán 22. 12. 2023
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''Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.'' -Søren Kierkegaard
Then, inevitably, you find yourself in the middle of solving a problem while experiencing it. But of course, life itself can’t be encapsulated into one word - ‘problem’ - but it is stocked with problems when lived.
Did my philosopher paper on him back in high school, I agree with that quote!
I'm in my 40s, and I can just say re-title this video as "the biggest mistake I've made in my 30s". What I want to say is, you are the youngest that you will ever be. Stop procrastinating. JUST DO IT! LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST NOW!
thank you I'm 23 and been lazy for a while. This msg has put my ass on fire. LOL. Thanks
Thank you for this message
I'm 41, agreed
Thank you. You are a blessing for saying this for us who need it.
Perfection is so overrated. It is the bumps along the way and how we react that define us…life accordingly. Time is the most precious commodity…
Omg I love how you set the scene for the storytelling. Like people passing by and kind of distupting the flow of the story. It was very creatove way for visually representing those disturbances on our way of achieving the goals we set for ourselves👍👍👍
Amen to that! it looked so good!
As someone who turned 30 this year, the biggest lesson I got from my 20s was "Don't chase money, chase experiences and knowledge, that will give you money, and more cool stuff later". Thank God, I got that lesson on time...
But the thing about getting money "later" has not fully happened yet, haha.
one day money will start coming to you mate, just keep it going! 💪🏾
Gracias bro por tu consejo, tengo 22 años no se que hacer de mi vida 😢, no pude ir a la universidad 😅
You’re absolutely correct. Chasing money is the slowest way to make money. Focus on making yourself strong in whatever you choose to do. It is and will be your foundation to whatever you deem success. To paraphrase Carnegie: take away my factories but leave my people and soon we will have better factories.
"Accepting something does not mean you have to like it" someone told me this recently and and I am still understanding the depth of it.
I’m loving this new wave of CZcamsrs who are operating in reality. Love the setting you chose for this video. Brilliant way to drive the point home.
I completely agree! I spent so many years not sharing my content out of fear of it not being good enough. I would start, post for a week or two, then run away for months only for the cycle to repeat again. Once I finally decided that I was sick of sabotaging myself and just posted consistently, now I have people that are actually engaged with the things I share. Thank you for continuously inspiring us all to go after our dreams and not hold back! ❤
Perfect timing to hear this message. I needed this perspective. Thanks Nathaniel!
Started watching you when I was 18, I am now 24 still learning things but trusting the process and succeeding in things I never thought I could. I credit my maturity to you and your life experiences. I’m glad to go see your success and I appreciate all you have done. Thank you
Hey Nathaniel 👋,
As I’m still in my 20s, I can say that there’s a lot of important life lessons I have yet to learn. But one lesson I’m glad I learned so soon is that although things in life don’t happen according to plan, life becomes less stressful once we embrace that reality and let things happen on their own terms. Once we do, we eventually become understanding and grateful that things happened the way that they did.
Sending you lots of love!!! ❤️❤️❤️🤗
P.S. This may be a bit early for me to say but, Merry Christmas! I hope you, Sky, and your parents spend plenty of valuable time together! 🎄
A major lesson for me has been to spend more time away from screens, and instead embrace nature and time outdoors. This has been a huge change for me. I also like mindfulness, it has helped me. The book 30 Days Without Social Media by Harper Daniels was a cool little book that I loved to bring to the park and do some mindfulness practices from. It's so important to ditch social media and screens for a while.
I was so lucky I learned this lesson at 18. It set me up for a lot of success in my 20’s in terms of being more prepared for the unknown unknowns. really happy for you that you learned this in your 20s Nathaniel because many people never learn this lesson even when they’re super old and it irks me to watch people navigate their lives making this same mistake over and over without learning from it.
Love this Video. Very calming. Feel like it touches upon fate e.g. what is meant to be, is meant to be for a reason.
I can personally relate, having put too much pressure on myself to achieve academically in my early 20s and now having to become more accepting of my path in my mid 20s... whatever that path my be
Wow this hit home, I can totally relate to that period too. I hope you're well Nath! Sending love.
What a beautiful message, and equally beautiful shots. I really love this new style and am excited for more !!
I just wanted to thank you. I have been watching you for over 4 years now and you have actually been quite the mentor, always a few steps ahead of me, articulating ideas that are just starting to roar up in my head. Your early 20s I was just exiting highschool and starting college and now my early 20s are your late 20s (I just graduated at 22). Im planing a trip right now and a few days ago I decided to cut out a big portion to give myself more room to breath, honoring what I need to enjoy the experience presently and room for error. I have wonderful people in my life but few who talk so openly and concisely about these variety of ideas, so thank you for the discussions and cinematography with it, it has been a pleasure.
I love your content, I'm about to reach my 30's and I think that in addition to how we can prepare for any decision in life, it is to start enjoying the path we choose for our goals , with the ups and downs, to be able to live more fully. greetings from Chile
I am so grateful for being able to see your growth. In the last couple of years, through your videos I can see how have you faced your life experience and wow... the words, the storytelling of it, the frames, lights. WOW!
Insanely cool foreground moves there!
Btw, you’ve inspired me to start producing my videos.
Thanks for all the great work you’ve been putting here!
Thanks Nathaniel, this is one of the videos I feel more identified with. Such a great advice and proposal!!
I’m watching this as 2023 comes to a close here in the next couple of days (it’s December 30, 2023 as I write this) and I really appreciate you sharing these insightful and thought provoking questions that I’m excited to ask myself and reflect on to prepare myself for and welcome a new year…perhaps these will be good reflections for the spring equinox as well. Thank you and much good fortune to you and your loved ones!
I do this even when creating my TBR. There might be a new release that's too perfect to pass up or a book at the library that catches my eye. Don't tie yourself down with so many plans you don't allow yourself to live.
This is great! I had this realization quite literally 3 weeks ago. Thanks for the video! This video has a 16mm camera look that just looks great! Happy New Year!
I love that there are people going by on their bikes during your video. Proves your point nicely.
People are going to go by on their bikes during filming, that's life... it's going to start raining too, go with it, that's life 😊
Could be staged
Been a long time watcher, never commented but just wanted to say that I've always liked and connected with your videos. So thanks for all the hard work and new ideas.
Thank you for this. Love your videos. Also recently started watching Ramit Sethi’s videos where he talks about adding a buffer for “Phantom Costs” (to home purchases, vacations, etc) and adding 15% to your Fixed costs to account for stuff we forget about. I used to beat myself up when I now realize I needed a “margin”. I now need to apply that to time management so that I can get to places without rushing :)
I love your videos, I always watch them when I feel stuck or unmotivated and it really helps, so thanks man, keep going ❤
It's something I accepted a long time ago that life never goes to plan. Just follow the wave and steer a little once a while.
Love those reflection questions!
Extremely powerful idea. I’m 28 going through the same phase. Learning to accept the unexpected and trust my resilience & resourcefulness.
Appreciate you!
this video really just came in the right time for me. I currently just turned 20 this august, and there's a lot of things that i want to be good at, yet i don't have any dominant skill that i have to "branding" myself. I was feeling in such a crisis that everybody has been talking about, quarter-life crisis. I realize i am always comparing myself with everybody else, and i feel fomo with something i don't even like. and even worse, i feel i am in a rush to be great at and be better than everybody else can good at. I am feeling so lost with my current situation. Thanks drew, for sharing this video. It helps me to take my own time and be more brave to take the risk of going different path to other people in my life as long as i'm happy with my own choice
You literally just spoke my mind man. Glad to know its not just me.
@@A_Students_Notebook yea bud, and i also think in this era of social media, some motivation is just also some kind of toxic to me to overpush myself to achieve all things in this 20s or else i would get left behind or some sorts. I think it's true the key to success are to take and endure the risk, commit, and just trust the process really.
When i was 19 i watched the anime "Cowboy bebop" and in one episode he says: "Whatever happens, happens" and ever since i heared that i try to think about life events in ways which allow me to get clarity over the things i can do to deal with "whateever happens". I sometimes struggle with the idea that i have to achive my bachelors degree as fast as possible or get better at my job and i get really stressed out when things dont go to plan but i also realise that all i can do is to make the best out of every day that i have. That means creating a todo list every morning of things i can actually achive today. And i try to schedule this workload in a way where i know that i wont burn out and take just small steps at a time. Most of the time this works out in ways where i even overachive my goals without stressing out as much about the end result.
wishing you a great Holiday season - Thanks for all the amazing content you have created this year... All the best for 2024
Loved the setup, Nat! Looks great, and the audio from you iphone is crisp 💪🏻
I wanted this video to be longer - so good!!
Thank you for this message, I really needed to hear this.
Nathaniel, your vids have legit been my mood boost in 2023 🌟 Thanks for keeping it real and making the tough days easier. Wishing you a rockin' Christmas and loads of love for the holidays! 🎄 Can't wait to see what 2024 brings! 🚀✨
DUDE! This came at the right time in my life. I am about to go back to University as a mature age student and have been tossing up constantly about what I want, how I can juggle study etc. But the truth is,. I just need to do it, find out, and enjoy the ride.
In this video, a lot of the B-roll footage was from my hometown in Norway, I find it so interesting because many of the locations you shot were locations I've been many times and that made the scenes sort of iconic or more special to me in a way. Especially since the topic of the video is something I am thinking about a lot as a man in my early 20s.
I'm in the middle of learning that when we accept a situation and stop fighting it, we can relaxe into it and make the best out of it. ❤
Right? I used to be so so rigid. And a lot of unfortunate stuff happened - i met some bad people, i have had health problems, but I've caused myself a great deal of stress in how i reacted to it and how much it always diacouraged me, which would take my energy from trying to solve the situation at habd. I had to learn this at my job too. I have always been very impatient and expected everything to go my way. In hindsight, i was a naive and entitled child. I think I've dealt with a great deal of isolation and setbacks and it is natural to feel frustrated, but it's better not to create needless suffering.
Nathaniel, I can’t tell you what your channel means to me and the timeliness of this video. I was laid off for a second time, my dog died, and my family moved all in the last couple months. I’m about to turn 25, I’m still single, I’m lost and unsure of what next or where to go in life. Feels like a lot of change coming, and I’m starting to embrace that. Would love to connect and pick your brain
So amazingly worded! Words so true to any age. Such inspiring words.
You said things that I really needed to hear , thanks❤
I keep coming back to the idea of 'openness to life'... experiencing life honestly and seeing/ enjoying what is here now ... relaxing in to it allows it to open up to us.... like a seed, life needs space time and sunlight to grow :)
Nathaniel I am 10 years older than you and your self-awareness and maturity always astounds me. When I watch your videos I always think of myself at your age and wish I could have had some of your emotional intelligence to deal with my pain and struggles. Keep up the great work.
Yes have a plan but balance out it won't a lways work your way, enjoy the journey.
Great advice!❤
In the last video you said you will make the videos more cenamatic and personal.
Bro I really can see the difference ❤🎉
Te vi en el 2022 grabando un video en NY y no fui capaz de acercarme! Siempre enamorada de tu contenido ❤️🫶🏽
the Tao Te Ching says that we need to be like a river and flow like water around/with whatever happens in life, whether good or bad.
I had this realization around age 22, on a several day cross-country road trip when things just kept not. going. to. plan. I agree, I think this is probably a stage that we all go through at various times. Living with margins built in for everything (time, $, energy, etc) reduces stress so much.
Im in my early 20s and i feel like ive mastered this. For me, life is about the now. So what if things dont go according to plan? You try again, you change courses, you try something different. It doesn't matter. While you have your family, food in your plate every night and a place your can call home what does "something went wrong" actually mean? Breing poor and so not being able to have freedom to do much as taught me to be content and happy like I am. Life is what you make it, it's not what you would like it to be or your plan. So I really make plans so i enjoy the journey more. I try to not even have a definite goal if i can do that i enjoy more the moment.
Also procrastinating like that man in the comments said is also a big thing. It's so weird not knowing about drama anymore by not using socials and i don't miss it one bit, it just seems sad now looking at the time of life i lost there. Now i do what i love. I paint, i go out with my dogs on adventures on the forest, i write, i sing, i play, i dance, i stretch, i read amazing books, i learn something knew, i go visit somehow i care about, i love life and i live it. Gosh i wish i did this when i was in highschool and gosh am i scared i will lose this will to live when i finish university and start a job. But in enjoying every single minute, not worrying about how things should go until then. Just enjoying the ride
a big thing also, i feel like, is realizing that this applies to everyone. i used to react by telling myself that there was something wrong with me whenever things would get difficult or wouldn't go according to plan - when i wasn't entirely in control of them. i am now learning to accept it as being a shared and universal experience we can all relate to
thanks for sharing
You just earned a subscriber.
I'm originally from Bangladesh, now an international student in Italy, and getting the study visa was THE most stressful thing in my life. I started realizing, I might even have anxiety problems.
But then I got the visa, and I thought "everything's gonna be alright now"... But no, then comes a lot of changes, but I think it'll pass. Then I face some setbacks, I repeat to myself "this is a one time thing". Now I'm stressed about study and job, and again I'm thinking "after this semester, life would be smooth"
I have already realised this, but I keep forgetting... Life never goes as planned.
Even as I write this, I'm actually modifying my CV to apply for a job and I keep finding minute details to edit, I keep thinking how my interview would be, what my expected salary should be. I'm exhausting my brain over making everything full-proof.
But again, nothing in life is full-proof😅 I just need to get the CV sorted, apply to a lot of places, and move on.
I needed this video ❤
This video came to me at JUST the right time
What you're talking about reminds me of 'The Surrender Experiment' - a fantastic read for anyone. Big mindset shift. What if we could just surrender to the circumstances presenting themselves in our lives rather than fighting against the wave to reach our ever changing desires?
Beautifully done 👌🏽
When you figure out this “margin”, please let us know. It’s something that is easy to say, but difficult to implement. I’m your parents age, have know about is “margin of error” for decades and how it’s just a part of life, but seriously…it’s so difficult to plan for or enter into your calculations. Making plans and then making plans for the “margin of errors” too can become its own planning and then it becomes very weighty. Literally! When I travel, I always over pack;because you just never know. And it’s a pain in the a**!😁What if you had taken your mother’s advice, what you have actually jumped in to buy your place? Or would you still be waiting to save up for that buffer amount? Love this vid. Cheers!
We love you Nathaniel !!
Hey! These are such simple questions but I am curious, where are you in your videos? I love the background drop. The canal and living boat reminds me of the Netherlands, not Paris. I am curious if there's such a place in Paris. Secondly, how is the audio of your videos so good? You're sitting there seemingly only with your iPhone, does it pick up audio well enough?
Cheers to sharing your life lessons!
Dang! You know j Krishnamurti. I highly recommend you to check out his conversation with David bohm(quantum scientist)
Omg, i agree so much with the quote by Krishnamurti, all my life i've been on survival mode 'cause of many reasons and this past few years i realized that nothing really matters, so why not be my truest self and be kind and present? I don't care what happens, we're all gonna die, so i decided i will fully live from now on, personally i think the secret to a happy life is do whatever the fuck you want without hurting others.
Like watching your videos now, are the same clips over and over again... from past videos if not all the videos!
I am re-reading that book in Spanish right now. The first time I read the book Psychology of Money in Brazilian Portuguese was incredible, but only in the second reading did I understand the message the book wanted to share. This book has a space in my list of the best books.
inspirational , epic, cinematic, , artistic, aesthetic Thank You Nathaniel
Will you ever do a public meet up? I'm 21 myself and have been watching on and off for around 3 years now. I'd absolutely love to have an in person conversation with you.
The word “success” seems like a very American and even, as I’m from England, a British quality. I feel this term, this quality holds us back from the bigger picture of living an open and happy life. Unless work really is 100% of your life, success is purely material wealth but joy and peace is a greater goal❤
The lighting, people on bicycles passing by, rain... presence. I don't know if that was the idea, but I feel like it was. Same with the video in the forest, I felt this beautiful presence. Presence for life. Embracing everything you can't control. | I also love Michael Singer's perspective on life. Very similar to what Krishnamurti said. I'm blessed to have found the person who's been leading his life by that philosophy. Thanks to him I spend my 20s falling in love with life and living comfortably with a paycheck of 200$ a month ;)
I ive always liked the concept of karma yoga in the bhagavad gita. Basically doing everything with all your effort but surrendering the fruits of your actions to become free of them.
"Never let the results of good work be the only motive for action nor allow inclination towards inaction take over…Renounce attachment and maintain equipoise in both success and failure"
Very good point.
My rule of thumb for time margin is after careful assesment and plannjng I multiply x pi (3.14) It's surprisingly accurate and It allows for enjoying the process. For money x2 is also pretty accurate and leaves room for the unforseen.
it took me ages to understand how my ex is toxic. we both work as journalists abroad, and i had a hard time understanding how one could possibly be so trapped in an expat life while supposedly being someone with the privilege of working in the field, dealing with all the logistical issues and unpredictability that come with reporting. like, bumping a knee against furniture would be the equivalent of 'having a horrible day.' i'm the type of person who brushes things off, trying not to sweat the small stuff (of course, i have my moments), but it's great that your video is focusing on letting life unfold! that's where its true delights are
I think many of us have been forced to think more openly and take each day as comes since Covid and this past year of chaos - This is a gift and ,though setting goals can be valuable, it hinders clarity ❤
Best cinematografía, dass CZcams hat. 10/10
I like this idea, a lot. I’m such a perfectionist which results in constant self-criticism and negative self-regard.
I thought if I watched enough of your videos, I’d finally find a message I agree with. This is the one.
Been listening to Michael A. Singer podcast a lot and he talks about acceptance quite often. If you want to work on that, he says you should start with small things, like "accepting the rain", like you said, and then keep building up. At some point, life becomes a lot lighter and easier to deal with cause you will lose some of your preferences that were not serving you :)
Sometimes we face bigger things like illnesses, and if we can not do anything about them, acceptance will at least take the burden of anger off it, so it will be more managable. He even talks about "what if they told you you have 2 months to live?", well, if it is really inevitable, you will use those months better if you accept it. Though I think it is easier said than done...
Moving to 3:2 aspect ratio is actually genius. Fills the desktop version of CZcams much better and on mobile if you turn the phone sideways it stretches all the way out, which does not happen for 16:9. Well played, dude.
There's an old saying that I hope nobody deems offensive, "man plans, God laughs." If we are lucky, we learn the lesson you have learned, and we are helped along the way by mentors. I remember one of your early statements in one of your videos being that you would never live in the USA again. I wondered then how you could make such a statement at such a young age. The "what ifs" that came to me, even the times ni my life that relocation, temporary or permanent, was one of those contingencies you speak of. You continue to grow and evolve. We all do.
Very well put! I completely agree.
Also, Dr.K said: "You're not entitled to fruits of your labour." I think it's great to keep this in mind.
I feel like the bikes going by were distracting, but also visually and aesthetically interesting
where could I find that hoodie. I love the phrase "amor fati"
I just turn 20 on the 16th so thanks for the advice
I understand your point, but I think sometimes leaving room for mistakes, and knowing you have something to fall back on is what gives us excuses to not succeed in an endeavour. I’m not saying you have to and can be successful in everything Bad sometimes, the all or nothing. Pressure will Help Us Figure out what we could not have without it
In other words…obstacle is the way. What stands in the way, becomes the way.
It goes back to stoicisme, the greeks described it very well also (maybe not on a financial point but more focus on the idea of "accptance")
As Thoreau says: "I love a broad margin to my life."
I'm 41 and life indeed never go 100% according to plan. Just ensure you have at least 2, 3 or 4 plans that are interchangeable, so if plan A fails for some reason then switch to most promising plan (B or C or D or ...) that will help you reach the unfinished goals from both plans faster and for less resources
That’s a nice watch. What brand is it?
The film is finished but reality is not. Sometimes it’s good to just let things play out, without trying to interrupt the scene.
how does the audio sound so good when you're just recording on your phone?
such a simple idea but so so so important
Great video. Thanks for sharing. New sub here 🎉😊
Our 20s are the “Middle School years” of Adulthood- not as good as we may have hoped, not as bad as we might have feared, awkward, and awesome.
This dude just realized that as people get older they get more risk adverse and conservative with their decision-making 👏 👏
Mind-blowing insight 🤯
Not sure if this was intentional, but the bikers moving past the frame were an interesting symbol for the message of your video. As a filmmaker, I know it can be easy to get caught up in trying to get the perfect shot and control everything. Maybe the "perfect shot" wouldn't have had the distraction of bikers passing by, but then again, they added a sense of realness to your message that helped get it across. So the things that aren't perfect and don't go according to plan can add to our lives in all sorts of beautiful ways. We just need the perspective and openness to notice them.
You can accept things without being happy about them
Could anyone find me the tracks used in this video please ? Love the vibe !
Agree! Don't sabotage yourself!
I let battling cancer derail my life and career and never recovered. Not the cancers fault. It was my own. I like it knock me down and didn't get back up as fast as I could have. My life would be a lot better right now with marginally more success, the only thing limiting me from starting a family, having everything I want, is just straight money. At 40 i still live paycheck to paycheck, and I have so many responsibilities now that I can't take the time to improve myself or my situation. I can only continue to get by. Absolutely chase everything you want every minute and dont ever stop. When you get older you realize having the the time and ability to work hard and achieve things is not work, it's the most wonderful part of life and the older you get the less time, ability, health, etc you have, everything just gets harder and you realize how much more you want to achieve and how many doors are closing.