Every woman is two women: exploring the wild west
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- čas přidán 16. 05. 2024
- Every woman is (at least) two women: the public-facing persona that she shows the world, and the bedroom persona that she shows her lover. Treating the one like the other is likely to result in complaints and hurt feelings. Unfortunately, it can be very difficult to glean reliable information about the bedroom persona by observing the public-facing persona, which complicates dating for both men and women. I discuss more in this episode.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #women
Every woman is (at least) two women: the public-facing persona that she shows the world, and the bedroom persona that she shows her lover. Treating the one like the other is likely to result in complaints and hurt feelings. Unfortunately, it can be very difficult to glean reliable information about the bedroom persona by observing the public-facing persona, which complicates dating for both men and women. I discuss more in this episode.
Pre-order my book: amzn.to/3UlsTsY
Book a paid consultation:
oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations
Subscribe to my newsletter: oriontarabanpsyd.com
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #women
Listen to islam that gets u 4 women rather than the single doctor figuring out these low life creatures for nothing
My last girlfriend was probably 4, 2 of which I knew the name of and have talked to. Her protector, Gina was the cruel one and she seldom let Joan experience the bedroom. The young girl I knew not her name, she seldom appeared. Since Gina would never relent, (& lied constantly) I had to discontinue the relationship. Fascinating, but tiresome. .
@@BracaPhoto True. But remember at least 1/3 of men do not get a chance to be the bedroom guy, ever.
SIMP! 😡
I think Orion is mistakenly trying to explain a sociological phenomenon from a viewpoint of psychological essentialism. I believe he had misdiagnosed the phenomenon as a difference in personality when it's actually a result of 💃s learned behavior conflicting with nature, which is exposed in the absence of social pressure.
Women are incredibly talented at acting. For men who value authenticity, good luck understanding this.
What? You want a woman overtly sexual in public? I am confused.
*Remember:* Each and _everyone of them_ is a well-versed drama-queen and highly talented actress from their childhood onwards.
It's just that very few women actually manage to make some acting career out of it an get paid royally for it very official.
Since many only get paid for average acting before the camera at face value in juicy bonuses … Others get it half-decently completely off the record.🎥
Though these days a bad bunch of them can make a living, by largely fooling mostly fans.🤓
Based
Woman here. If it helps, I feel my most authentic at home and in the bedroom with my husband. It's when I'm in public, the 'mask' goes on. I thought it would be the same for men.....??
@@INTJ.softy-be4llyes. If a man is vulnerable, the smart place to do it is at home with his family. Even then, if you're too vulnerable too often around your woman, she will lose respect for you. Most guys will let the mask slip around other guys deemed non judgemental...at least the self aware ones.
Oh my God. I've experienced multiple of both instances where the public persona is pure and the bedroom persona is freaky, and where the public persona looks wild but the bedroom persona is timid.
It's often like that, the exact opposite.
Jungian shadow side...
I only ever had 2 freaky girls and they were both way freakier than me.
Unintegrated. Leave them alone.
Aren't you the same?
I believe in most cases that people who are outwardly 'sexy' are not very sexually interesting. People who are truly sexually fulfilled don't feel a need to display to the world.
What if as a man you like to tan just because you know it increases your lifespan? I've been getting harassed by it kids in the neighborhood just for not having a shirt on and wearing short shorts. But haven't said anything back to them.
True
I know that many U.S. soldiers after the war either directly heard on their stay in Germany or at least knew from a distant soldier, that, whenever they ended up with relations with the local gals, oftentimes had to listen to that German saying - which especially many older men and women/wives/grandmothers used almost inflationary (for a reason), which goes like;
_„Wer Nichts hat, muß Alles zeigen.“_ - In English it literally means, _“If you have nothing, you have to show everything.”_
Of course it was referring to women's outer appearance and meant, when a woman has nothing (left) of dignity and was already 'experienced', she had to reveal everything beforehand.
That being said, whenever some of these gals back then ran around in articular revealing clothing, everyone _knew_ for a fact, that she already had given herself away to a lot of soldiers.
Nobody is sexually fulfilled. Sexual desire is the reason you suffer
@@Insight-music My wife and I are very compatible and have a lot of fun after 10 years together. I am fulfilled. I do not suffer in that regard as I did before. Stop projecting.
All true with a caveat- women share their "bedroom" persona (and their partner's as well) with all of their other girlfriends, sisters, sister-in-laws, etc. Been married 25 years and believe me fellas... the sisterhood is real and they tell each other EVERYTHING.
Yes. They are very very trustworthy. Ask any inmate in a penitentiary how they got caught
Yeah, agreed. Even if its not every detail they're sharing, they're getting the point across to theirs;)
And they pat each other on the back for sexual withholding like it's a game.
Woman here. Not all. I am very private, introverted, friendly but few 'real' friends if that makes sense. I often have to remind my husband not to share too much.
I am a woman and I prefer to regulate privately. Although I know most women find an inner circle to regulate themselves with. But this is healthy because many woman don’t have their character well developed just yet and need trustworthy input to helping them manage their lives.
The reason you cant tell the the bedroom persona by the public persona is because the bedroom persona is often a reflection of her perception of you rather than her own public persona. The wild girl with the tats might really have a wild bedroom persona but what she presents is largely based on her perception of your bedroom persona. In other words the persona she presents is not so much about her persona, but its her perception of your persona you are seeing reflected at you. Two different men can experience two different bedroom personas in reference to the same woman.
Spot-on.. ;)
Yep and that's down to how safe she feels with you.
She might really want to present her real bedroom persona to the man, but not trust him enough to do so.
@@jenster29 _"that's down to how safe she feels with you."_
I disagree. It's down to how HOT you are and how INTO you she is. Strong Successful Male channel does about 2 videos a week about men who find out their wives are doing freaky an@l and 0rgies with affair partners while all they ever get is boring, passionless missionary (and not even oral). RAW, savage attraction can't be faked, can't be negotiated. It's there or it isn't.
@@TheRomans9Guywhy is that? Could that be considered being fake?
The issue is, for most of the Boss chicks, they have to be extremely into you for you to be able to see that side of them early on. Usually, Boss chicks try their hardest to test you as man before you see their "other side". All women take time, just depends on who the man wants to invest in.
And that's why it's barely worth it.
A lot of boss chicks are like that due to societal pressure, not real personality traits. The vast majority of "alpha" or "dominant" women (self described) that I've been with are submissive behind closed doors. They just want a man to prove it, not act it
@@andrewcarlson2178 _"They just want a man to prove it, not act it"_
This is SUCH BS!! Not you, the masculine "alpha" women. They claim they'll be feminine and submissive for the _RIGHT_ man. Turn it around, if you're in a dress & heels and talk in a high voice with a lisp and drone on about the new Versace fall lineup they'll reject you for being too feminine. Just tell them you'll be masculine for the "right woman" and see how far that gets you. Exactly nowhere, that's where.
Nah, women have zero rules and boundaries for the men they desire. If you pay for what others didn't, you're just a sucker. You're paying full price for a rental.
I've seen this a lot (due to sub-culture I belong to). Type A in public women are *Very* often subs in the bedroom but that's a very vulnerable position to be in. They need to know you're safe to surrender to, in addition to the normal dating connection stuff. There is also a wide variety in what that means exactly.
I get this, but the more important thing is how she relates to you outside of sex. Most of your relationship, unless it's a strictly sexual relationship, won't be about her sexual persona. You'll spend far more time living life with the woman than sleeping with her. If the competitiveness or domineering nature is there with you outside of her bedroom persona, it doesn't matter that she likes being tied up and whipped in bed. You're living with a quarrelsome woman and that's been a no, no for 2000+ years, see. Proverbs 21:9.
I don’t agree. The oposite scenario from what you presented is when you do have a satisfactory relationship with a woman in her public persona, but she doesn’t trust you enough to reveal her true private persona. You might get along with her just fine in non-sexual situations, even for years. But if she continues to not trust you sexually it will eventually come out in ruin. She’ll cheat on you, or lash out in other ways.
Very true, and good comment. Bedroom persona also bleeds into "home" persona. There's a lot of "cross pollination" there. It's not just about being physically dominating in the bedroom (although it helps a ton); being a leader is about confident decision making, having a purpose outside of your woman and setting and enforcing boundaries.
But make no mistake: sex isn't about physical gratification. Sex is about power.
Yep. Unfortunately for me my other half is a PITA outside the bedroom and in the bedroom she's always h0rny. For me h0rny all the time doesn't make up for being difficult all the time though.
@@andrewcarlson2178If sex was always about power, could it really that be good?
I think about the times of staring into each others eyes, whispering secrets, after edging and the third *gasm feeling connected to the universe, us both loving everything that exists.
A great sexual partner allows you to build a pretty good bond to handle other events. You'll also not take the rest so seriously - and neither will she. You have had a "Private Conversation" which trumps everything.
People act differently in different contexts. This is true of every human, we all wear many masks 🎭
I disagree when looking at the genders. Men, if allowed, would be brutally honest almost 100% of the time, public or private. They only put on the mask in public because they are forced to.
Thanks for the REALITY CHECK. Some of these comments are really demoralizing!
@@cnihtYou think this isn't the same for women? Most women who express how raunchy and sexual and judgmental they actually are are considered "low value" women lmao
I thought you were going to say: the woman she pretends to be to lure you in, & the other woman being the one you learn about during the break up / divorce
The actress vs the character she's playing.
Great comment. Yes, they lure you into their trap and the whole time you thought it was your trap luring her. By the time you realize that- it’s too late and you’re soon sitting on a plastic lawn chair in basement suite, eating frozen dinners with plastic cutlery - broke, hurt and devastated
Seriously everyone is like this, it's part of the courtship dance. We all try to impress potential mates because we want them to like us. Very few people go on first dates trying to piss their date off. Women are more emotional so it can be a bit more drastic for them. Most people are on their best behavior for a year...guys can relax about the 6 month mark whereas with women i give them 18 months.
@@andrewcarlson2178 Women will act for YEARS to get the ring.
If you're dumb enough to fall for the trap you deserve the consequences of divorce. Whenever you marry a woman you make another one's life a living hell if she doesn't end in a coffin. Be aware of that, we live in a small world where everything is connected. You give the power to a woman but you don't know what women are capable of.
Ooooo, this is why women want the side of men that is "hidden" from the world!! They feel like they are giving him her hidden side and wants that feeling to be reciprocated.
And get ammo for later.
It’s not just women. We are all different people in different places. I am different around my wife, around my kids, at work, at church, around my parents. I have many different personas.
ok simp
Lying... that's cool
@@deshaunjackson8188 grow up
This what what society forces us to be.
The video was more for the young and oblivious men that still have to catch on, to realize that women might have more depth than what meets the eye. Sometimes some of us take things too literally and expect reality to be as honest, reasonable and logical as ourselves.
At least that's what I felt for a while haha
Nothing better than a fresh cup of coffee and a psychacks video promptly released at 10 am 🤠
I have often fallen into the trap of starting to "respect" the woman I love too much in the bedroom. I start out aggressive and feral and as I fall more deeply in love I begin to soften. I make the mistake of replacing f**king with "making love."
Happens - then she loses complete interest and moves on
@@big_red_machine3547yep
Woman here. I understand what you are saying but I think this is very solvable by doing both - feral and loving, and not always at the same time!
How can you guys get excited over these modern ladies?
To me it's more like precarious balance between disgust and desire since their characters are so atrocious.
@@edheldude Totslly agree
Spot on. No doubt about it! I have been both pleasantly AND unpleasantly surprised!
I’ve met both types of women: ones whose bedroom persona is wildly different from their public persona, and ones whose bedroom persona is quite similar to their public persona. I think it just depends on the woman.
Every guy that had something with a woman who ... REALLY wanted him knows exactly, that they are two seperate human beings
Absolutely. She completely lets you know.
No holes barred!😅😅
It's best to get with girls who have burning desire for you and some slight daddy issues... (joking but only kinda)
@@mrsherwood2599Why I can only deal with women who REALLY want me. Once you get that kind of treatment and sexual experience, you can’t settle for anything less.
I slightly disagree with a small portion of this. I don't think it's a misconception, but an attraction problem. If someone isn't attracted to the public persona, the private persona won't matter
No that private persona can change your mind. I have been with girls that were not as attractive (I wouldn't say ugly but maybe 6 out of 10) but were wild and down to do anything I wanted and good at it - definitely bumped them up some points even if they were kind of dull public persona.
Public persona is all ego, who you really are always comes out behind closed doors
@JonathanTodd-og7dd This isn't what the OP is talking about. If I'm not attracted to cantankerous control freaks (the outward/public persona), I don't care if she becomes the freakiest p star that does it all in the bedroom. To me, the tradeoff isn't worth it because sex is, by comparison, a small portion of the relationship.
I'd still have to live with, endure, and be "forced" to suffer upon myself the parts of her I absolutely despise. What Orion isn't new, nor is it only true about women; ask high-end escorts about their C-suite clientele and they'll tell you the same type of thing.
@@JonathanTodd-og7dd6 is cute. I think your scale is off due to s%xual attraction/drive and clearly you value sex a lot.
Otherwise why would you put your d in such a woman?
Spend more time by yourself, and you will accept yourself and be authentic around others. It's that simple.
If she keeps HER private things private she is a lot more likely to keep YOUR private things private!
until she deems your things "her things because couple" , and at this point, her besties will know anything and everything, and your right to intimacy will stop existing...
The most introverted girl I've dated has also been the freakiest on the bed😭😭
Have you been tested?
@@Preciouspink what do you mean by tested?
As ever your contributions are very articulate and well observed
Dr. Orion. Thank you indeed for your help in these matters. I feel much better now😊
Fascinating talk, Dr. Terban! You’ve really opened my eyes to the complexity of women's dual personas.
Sunday School teacher confirming accuracy. ❤
you be the calm ones then get 9 kids 2 years into marriage,wild😅😅😅
@@ronokkusi LOL. That's funny.
This is a great one! You are spot on with your content.
I highly enjoy these topics 🙌🏾.
Your way to argument is amazing. In Italy nobody has this way to explain so important topic so clearly amd.shortly. Despite there are cultural nuances, 99% of what you explain can be applied here as well.
Actually the concept of Madonna/Whore were this explanation is coming from is related to Italy. From the Italian Mafia movies, where all the gansters would have their public lady (wife), the bedroom woman (lover).
Ma,e and female nature transcends culture, although culture can dictate male and female relations. Your new PM is a great example, obviously she is a boss chick but things have gotten Progressive and "woke" and now she has emphasized a return to more traditional family life and having kids because of the population decline. I imagine she is likely a traditional woman at home, as much as that would be possible in such a position.
Can you give me any Latin to English words that mean finance that's important? I'm trying to learn Italian just for financial and legal reasons.
Probably another good video. I made it to about a minute when I realized I don't care. Well, I care enough to tell strangers I don't care but that's about it.
So thought provoking. Thank you!
I would also add, that women can - and do - present the public facing persona to everyone else and at the same time present the bedroom persona to the man she is attracted to... right in front of everyone else.
Some men catch this and others are confused about mixed signals.
As always doc, always on point🎉🎉🎉
Very impressed as always, thank you
You omit the necessity of why women are wired this way.
Love this channel.
Thank you for the quality content. From 🇲🇽
Viva México ❤️
I am not sure that this same "dichotomy" does not apply in the exact same way to men.
It’s like the difference between Becki Falwell and Amber Rose.
Allegedly, they are both the opposite of their public persona.
I really liked your remarks about under regulated and over regulated…and the effects it has on a possible partner. The question can be seen as “in this society how far can I or we go before external powers object to our behavior and then intervene in an unpleasant manner?” This is a practical problem. Thanks for pushing me to think deeply.
Good one. This topic was first discussed on CZcams by the "late great" Coach Red Pill, aka Gonzalo Lira. His title was "All women are two women", the one she really is by nature, and the sexual woman she projects. The general theme of that video was that guys should "ignore" the sexual projection as best as possible and focus on who she really is, thereby greatly reducing possible red flags and thus potential future problems.
i came to this realization back in college when i dated a so called nerd; i had the shock of my life when on our first encounter, she almost broke my eggplant
The girls in the drama club were also fun as hell. Most people looked at them as nerdy or a bit quirky but I learned a hell of a lot from them
I found this out as an athlete my senior year in highschool... it was the last 3 months of school and I slept with a nerd from my class... I was so busy chasing the "popular girls" that I didn't realize I was missing a whole genre of girls that A) deemed me high status because I was an athelete B) were willing to go the extra mile because they never had or been with a guy like me before... I was so busy during highschool dating the girls in my social circle I missed out on a ton who where willing to go above and beyond.. lol I ended up playing ball in college and my strategy changed up.. I would still get with girls that where around us athletes but I would also flirt and get at our study aids and tutors... they honestly where better in bed and to Date 9 times out of 10... people don't realize.. what she is wiling to do for YOU may be a whole different thing she is willing to do for the next guy.. you got to be the guy that brings it out of em
As the saying goes; 'It's always the quiet ones'...
"It's always the ones you least suspect."
“Better living through chemistry” - DuPont
That’s all I think when you say “better living through psychology”
My experience as a woman is that men don’t have to worry about this. If I’m interested in sharing a bed with a man he will see glimpses of my sexuality. If he doesn’t, it’s because I don’t want him to.
As a Super Busy Mommy, lets hope you are reserving that side of you to the father of your child and not going around sleeping with various other men.
Very true. Well stated.
Thank you Doc!
Good advice!!
Great points!
Great video
Thanks ! Good video. By the way, your microphone choice is good. The Senheisser has a better clarity than the, ubiquitously popular, Shure SM7b. I'm listening to your voice through some stereo speakers, so I can get the full audio range of your voice. This microphone is serving you well. It's not the trendy one, but it's the one that works better for this application (as long as a person's voice isn't naturally shrill, then a SM7b would tame some of that.)
Sir. Thank you for sharing.
Top tier stuff as always
There are six people saying "I do" at the altar. Who someone's partner thinks they are, who they think they are, and who they actually are... and vice versa.
Everyone is different in different situations. Guys and gals.
I live in Reno, Nevada .
20 yrs ago, I was a taxi driver.
I had a regular passenger, she was from a conservative Midwestern small town.
Gorgeous. 5..5 tall, long blonde hair. Hollywood good looks.
3 times a year she shows up and works the strip clubs, brings men to her hotel for private something.
The rest of the yr she's sweet/innocent/active in Church.
This is actually one of the few, very few, things about women I figured out by myself. 🤣
You hit the nail on the head with this episode!
Excellent ❤
Same is probably true for men; we all need to portray something on the outside we aren’t necessarily in private… 🤷🏻♂️
I am a woman and I am exactly how you described. Can totally confirm what you stated. 👍
lol animal commenting on how a pet should be treated
Absolutely fits my experience. And it’s kinda fun actually.
I think these videos are actually starting to fuck my head up.
It puts too many "ideas" of how things "should" be, and you end up not being able to relax and have fun. Plus, he teaches superficiality, so you'll end up focusing on all the wrong stuff because of watching his videos.
So they communicate with a forked tongue, metaphorically speaking
No...their sexual life just isn't anyone else's business
It shows good sense and respect of boundaries.. I wish more people would keep their private things.....private.
@@jenster29They use deception to present a socially acceptable version. Women hate being accountable - especially for their own choices, actions, and values. They want the chameleon-like freedom to manipulate others and not be judged, and thus nailed down, as a specific person. There's no integrity, just loyalty to their own emotions.
No, it's that our tongues have multiple uses. Literally. One public, one private.
@@jenster29sexual life is not outside but inside life itself
Theres also 2 main persona's for women in the bedroom atmosphere...
If she actually likes & respects the guy, she holds back a bit, with insecurities of being judged/perceived a certain way.
With guys she's strictly sexually attracted to & doesn't see as a viable long term partner, she'll go all out...
Not always, but a lot..
If it's strictly sexual, it's hard to open up, feel safe, and be vulnerable, to truly feel all the feelings inside.
It's how the guy she's with makes her feel. If she's feeling judged there's a reason for that. He's likely critical in every day life.
The guy she's completely free with, the sexual partner, is praising and complimenting her.
No. Exact contrary in fact!
For further research, listen to the song "Behind Closed Doors" by Charlie Rich.
Great song
That song freaked me out when I was a kid!😅
Truth spoken here! Watch, listen, and learn.
Doc spitting facts as usual
I'm always impressed by and enjoy your contents, Dr Taraban.
You pointed out some interesting points. I believe such push and pull moments are transitioned to dating apps and social media from physical meeting or intimate moments these days.
Can you please clarify or elaborate ?
Thank you
To a point. If she is not caring and selfish in public, she will be the same in the bedroom.
Great book title.
Please do an audiobook of The Value of Others. I can’t wait to read it.
He plans to. I know a lot of us are looking forward to hearing him read it. : ) If you haven't sub'd to his free newsletter, that's where you'll get the most up to date info about it. The links in the description.
Love you orion
Thank you!
Good video. Thx
This clarifies what I intuited and makes my future feel brighter. A lady in the streets and a tiger in the sheets as they say.
Wow, this is 100% accurate in my personal experience. I'm the reserved, modest, quiet girl in public, and as far as I can tell, that "public persona" is authentically me. I don't think I'm "trying" to be socially acceptable. In fact, I probably miss out on social acceptance by keeping to myself, but I don't mind. My "bedroom persona" preference leans more the opposite of my public persona. It does kind of depend on how open and liberated the man is with his own bedroom persona, and as Orion implied, a lot of guys seem really vanilla compared to what I'd prefer, so sometimes (most times) I do have to dial it back. I really like being able to get in touch with that part of myself, though, when the situation is right.
Omg, I’m 64 and all I want, is for my wife to touch me back.
Practical Female Psychology for the Practical Man by South and Franco covers this in detail and is a must-read.
Second time someone recommended this book in comments. Why is it $29.99 CAD for a softcover? That’s way more than a good quality hardcover
The Evolution of Desire by David Buss
@@andrewcarlson2178 You read it? Good?
Thanks!
It's NOT her job to be genuine and understandable. It's up to the man to take a risk and find out who she really is. Champions take risks.
I think women are more aware of sexuality and reproduction, I mean you can see why getting pregnant is a huge deal.
The irony is it’s always with the wrong guy tho
@@Insight-music she always let's him it raw,now she a single mom,now she's a single mom. 🎶 🎶
A woman will always live with their kid if they want. Most will stay in the family home finances permitting.
A man can come home from work, get told by his significant other that it's over. Then he'll have, in most cases, to leave the family home, have massively reduced time with his kid, pay alot of $ in child support & find out john from accounts has stepped into your shoes...all from doing everything right. What % of men does this happen to? I'd say 70% or so if the men that enter relationships.
@@travis3430 if a man could fix a woman’s unhappiness, he would do it gladly, but he can’t, because it’s impossible. Men are sold this idea in their youth only to be taken advantage of as an adult. There is no rule book to avoid this outcome. No red pill courses, no pick up artistry, no therapy, no money, no moral system on the man’s part can remedy the fact that modern female these days will act off what her emotion says regardless if it brings chaos to the lives of everyone around them. He can do everything right, provide everything she says she wants, yet still you’re playing Russian roulette with your life
Oh, so I'm not alone! Good to know.
My partners have ended up real surprised in the past.
Yes. Very accurate. Its only a question of how wild the west gets. And how far to the east you may need to run.
I remember what the Japanese says about the 3 faces. Sometimes you can really know the true character and attitude of a person until you meet them in real physically especially under one roof. Sometimes our outside is opposite what's on the inside just like what we are publicly is not who we are privately. Yes it's also make sense.
There are transparent and open and there are mysterious people on earth.
Consider “internal family systems “ therapy…we are all multiple people…but NOT to the level of a disorder.
❤ Truth! Girls... share this one with all the guys you know. ❤
Women are different with whoever man she is with. Her bedroom persona can be based on her level of attraction. What she enjoyed with one guy may not what she will enjoy with you....
Which especially hurts a man when he realizes that when she was with another man, they got to see a side of her that he couldn't ever see.
Reminds me of my fiance, she dresses very conservative, doesn’t like attention but her body is equivalent to a fitness model on IG and behind closed doors she doesn’t hold back, pleases me in every way but seeing her in public you’d never guess
Lucky man. Let's hope once she is your wife she does not change, but most do.
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation:
00:13 *🔍 Women have two personas: the public-facing persona and the bedroom persona, each distinct and not always aligned.*
01:09 *🛌 The bedroom is metaphorically the wild west of sexuality, with few rules and anything goes.*
02:03 *💼 It's important for men to understand that a woman's public-facing persona doesn't necessarily reflect her bedroom persona, making navigation of this dichotomy challenging.*
04:19 *💼 The "boss b*tch" phenomenon highlights the disconnect between a successful woman's assertive public persona and her potential desire for a more submissive role in the bedroom.*
06:10 *💬 Men should avoid assuming a woman's desires based solely on her public persona, as attraction can lead to willingness to explore new things in the bedroom.*
07:29 *🧠 Women often navigate conflicting societal messages about sexuality by either hyper-controlling or under-regulating their sexual behavior, impacting their approach to intimacy.*
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How about this too- she pulls back and doesn’t return your texts- then you send her 10 pages of text walls proclaiming your love and apologizing for what you must’ve done to upset her and looking like a total simp- emotional loser? Then you get ghosted. It happens to the most animalistic, masculine of us!
@@big_red_machine3547maybe you were being an ass. Sending a wall of text saying 'sorry for whatever I did' just no.
I bet money she told you and you considered it nagging
True. I am in a leadership role *and* hold a psychology MA degree. When I was disconnected from me,
My feelings, the corporate world was a great fit. It’s quite the opposite now. As my manager put it, ‘it’s not common to take care of teams as you do’. Some men expected me to be the lady boss in the relationship as well speaking about business and sharing zero feelings. no thank you.
Women should not be in leadership roles, except at home with their children.
From a jungian standpoint, what you say is true. The person n°1 represents the social persona, the conscious level of the individual. The person n°2 represents our inner self, and in particular our shadow. And this does apply to males and females. The only difference is that females, as you mentioned it, tend to over adapt in the social realm which is mainly men oriented. Therefore, when she is behind closed door all her feminity combines with her shadow and that gives us sometimes a nuclear weapon because the energy used to catch up with her feminity is huge. Sometimes we can go from a saint to a slut. Really knowing a woman is essentially behind closed doors. For the rest it's just a mask.
I've been both pleasantly surprised and severely disappointed more times than I can count.
Thanks. Moscow, Russia
I think every person has many faces.
Faces for different situations and whom you are around
REALITY CHECK!
True...I'm a woman and sooo accurate. For me there's an additional personality when abused, disrespected or put down, because I then become afraid. Survival mode kicks in. Great talk! Love ur vids.
How on earth did you managed … _How could you possibly twist it that way and put yourself into the role of a _*_victim_*_ again?!_
My oh my … *It's about the **_public_** persona for everyone else, and the **_private_** persona behind closed doors!* It's that simple … 🙄
Everybody has a survival strategies some more than others.
@@Smartcom5 They just always feel the need to express their victimhood. It's mind boggling i know.
Same! I've been through a lot of grape and pain quite young. I'm a boss of a big company, but if someone triggers me, my mind goes blank and I go into survival mode.
When I feel safe with my lover, I love it and express all my funny silly qualities!
Publicly I am serious and in control.
And how did you figure out that side of yours? Let me guess..
Sociologically this is every single person in the world ever in modern society.
Yup mine was a freak and totally duplicitous
I want to see what the women say about this. PUAs used to refer to the overarching phenomena as "female sexual duplicity"
I left a comment above.
The human race is built on mutual sexual desire.
It's not that the men are three times bigger and they overpower women, their sexual organs are spiked and they get stuck in the female. No.
Men and women are roughly the same size. Human male organs are designed to push out and neutralize the stuff of the previous person. Human female organs are filled with 6 orgasms spots and bodies have a lot of erogenic zones. We are built to do it - a lot and with many people.
We all crave sex, but women just have to be much much more careful about how to organize it without suffering the consequences.
When we do find a good person and place, and feel safe, of course we go all out!
If there is abuse or trauma, these people might act sexual outwardly, but have a hard time connecting to it internally.
Human personality is many things and consistency is not one of them.
My wife is just one woman when it comes to that aspect. She's a prude in public and a prude in bed. The bedroom woman used to exist in her, but I guess she ran away 7 years ago.
...with someone else.
The boss babes that i've encountered are annoying because they do claim that they want a man who leads and allows them to relax, but they cherry pick what that is. This leads to confrontation over the silliest things because they want to assert themselves, even with you. They also put on their boss babe hats in public settings to keep up perceived appearances leading to clashes sometimes. It's annoying to constantly deal with them. They're best as casual dates.
This applies to men as well
Hey Orion, any chance on getting a video on how to be single? Recently I decided to put women and dating aside but I'm not really sure on how to proceed. Thank you.
Just act like they don't exist and focus on doing whatever makes you happy.