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HR Is Not Your Friend. Before You Complain At Work, Watch This...
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- čas přidán 15. 08. 2024
- Human Resources is not your friend. If you’re in a toxic workplace or dealing with a workplace issue, like a bad boss, you might want to complain to HR. There are there to help right? Well, before calling HR to complain about your boss or complain about a coworker or toxic work environment, there are a few things you need to know. In this video I’m breaking down what does hr do, why hr is not your friend, and when you should file an HR complaint (and what you need to have ready)
Chapters
0:52 Super important!
1:09 The practical reason for not calling HR.
2:49 What does HR do, and what is absolutely not their job.
5:58 HR (and your toxic boss) strike back
8:14 Will they help you?
9:33 When to File an HR Complain (and oh 💩plan you MUST have ready)
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Here's what i've learned - HR is about protecting the company. Not the employees....just saying.
That’s right HR acts to protect the company’s best interest not necessarily the employee’s. If the company is on the wrong side of risk a individual may perceive favorable HR action toward them but in larger context HR acts with intent to protect the company’s image, reputation, or to hedge themselves against greater financial or social loss. I caution people from thinking HR “cares about you”.
Yup. After I was in a situation with an employee who was harassing me, I realized they actually don’t care to protect me. It was in that moment that I lost all loyalty to my company.
HR is not your friend. They cover for management every time and will throw you under the bus.
That's what I've been telling my colleagues for years. The only time they investigate the management is when a possible lawsuit is there against the company or the company is losing money because of the management and they want to replace them.
Exactly
I won 6 figures from a class-action lawsuit because HR was acting in a discriminatory manner. I took that money and brought commercial real estate property. What a blessing. Thanks, HR!!!
@@andrea45347 It was a class-action lawsuit brought initially by someone in the corporate office. Word traveled to us in a completely different city and office and I called the lawyer's office from the number a coworker gave me. From there I answered questions filled out a thick packet with best dates and names and forgot about it. A year and a half later we got paid because the company settled and the 100+ of us agreed. One woman saw the wrong and wanted it corrected, that's how it started.
Your not only smart for holding your employer accountable ....your even smarter for investing the settlement in an income producing asset. 👍
How did you find a lawyer? They are so many people claiming discrimination, so I really wonder how you found one? Going thru reduction in hours right now.
How do we initiate a class action? Can that be done against a state HR?
I say report everything!!!!
People are no longer judged on their work, they are judged on how they can schmooz, or socialize with the right people. It's about who YOU are, who YOU know, ... yada yada bla bla bla. So glad I work for myself now. Many years in corporate, ugh, and many years in education, ugh! Love what you are doing,
Same here. I love working for myself. I was having this conversation with a friend the other day. She was a long time employee at a company, loves her job and the people, always working overtime, putting 100 percent into her job, but got passed over for a promotion. Someone who was only there a year go the job. I think they passed her over because she's very diplomatic and makes friends easily. When I still worked for companies, I was also passed up for promotions for "too nice." Well "nice" works great when you're self-employed. I give myself my own raises and I'm busier than ever, rarely getting a day off -- and I LOVE it!
Absolute truth 👆
totally agree. i am a teacher....cant wait to retire.
I've been at my present job going on 31 years and a huge promotion went to a 24 year old guy who only worked there for three years! He and his family are best friends with the human resources manager! He tells coworkers that he will kiss as many asses as he has to, so he can climb the corporate ladder! I can't wait to get out of there! He steals other people's ideas and uses them as his own and the upper management think that he is brilliant!
I am so sorry. That happens way too much doesn't it. Just bide your time and keep your head up. It will come to an end.
XO Carol@@apollovizsla
After 42 years on this planet, I can comfortably say that at work, you have absolutely no friends. Ever. Assume from the moment you punch the clock for the first time that every single person from every single department, is out to find some way to get you fired.
Lmaooooo thanks for the good advice as a 20 year old
It’s always the friendliest people too.
@@joshuapearson2217 "The bigger the smile, the longer the dagger." -Someone fired, probably.
Yes, this is the best adivice. Wished I could go back in time!!! I learned this the hard way!!!
This is very very true unfortunately. Unfortunately I have confided personal information to a coworker who I believe will use it against me to get fired.
If you work in a toxic environment: be compliant, be a team player, be flexible, don't complain...all while you secretly look for another job! Leave on a high note. Don't try and "fight the system", don't try to be the "one who finally makes the difference", it's all futile when you are going up against toxic people who look forward to retaliating against you...no job is worth that stress.
Totally agree 🙌
agreed
I just fvck with them for fun on the low, then get a new job and bail.
Now I own my own company and thats over.
I find going against the manager or the company, rarely works in your favour. As soon as the boss knows your not happy they make life more difficult
@@matthewsmith2787 thats why you need to be clever. I always seems to win the game of fvckery, and when I quit they hire 2 or 3 people to replace me.
HR is brand protection. Never go to them if you have an issue with harassment or discrimination. Go to your lawyer FIRST, and DO NOT tell anyone about it.
This is a safe way to proceed IMHO
Move in silence! 🤠
The problem with this advice is most people or at least a lot of people, cannot afford a lawyer. It would cost more to hire a lawyer than would to just find a new job.
“Where did you learn, to fly?”
I wished I’d known this. I reported harassment and hostile workplace to my HR department and they later fired me.
I’m a relatively young person (late 20’s), but even in my short working life I’ve come to realize how extremely under appreciated you are as an employee. The company/agency and managers only consider you as a mindless drone to fulfill their goals. You aren’t even treated as a human being. Ever day I work I feel like my positive energy is being siphoned from me as I am overworked and forced to deal with toxic individuals on a regular basis. I realize this video is directly referencing HR but I felt it was necessary to comment about the overall workplace environment given HR’s contribution to this never ending cycle of toxicity that pervades the American workplace. I feel that this mindset was imprinted on us from a young age when we were in school, when teachers and principals would mishandle bullying and not take it seriously or even blame the victim for being bullied in the first place. This attitude carries with us to the workplace, as if we were conditioned from a young age that when we become victims of harassment we do nothing but stay silent and let it keep festering. How has this attitude benefited American society as a whole except increase the rates of depression, suicide and violence? Studies have shown that in workplaces where bullying isn’t taken seriously there is less morale and productivity, which negatively impacts the company in the long run. In other words, they may not care now, but they don’t realize that they’re digging their own graves.
This right here
Very well said.
I'm 30 and have worked several different types of jobs. All of them were toxic to some degree and your comment explains everything to a tee... The best thing for all us is to strive for self-employment and to answer to no one. It's a blessing that you've come to this epiphany so early on.
I know what you mean, I work in the UK now (I'm originally from Eastern Europe) and it's quite similar here! Really depressing. I genuinly cannot understand why a victim can't complain when there is a real reason for doing so. In my country no one would try to blame you if you complained about someone else bullying you. How ridiculous is that!
You are wise beyond your years. I'm nearly 60 years old and I'm beyond tired.
This is why I low-key want to be a housewife. Workplace drama, dealing with HR members and coworkers with no integrity is too much stupidity for me.
Hey, if your husband earns enough money on his own you could totally be a housewife. People think it's a hard merciless job, but it's literally just taking care of your own home and cooking. (which everyone has to do when they get back from work anyway.)
@@petscraftsandwonderfulthin1279but not everyone has it like that. 😅
@@barose1 Home making can go from easy to stressful, like any job. Haha. But hey, at least it means you get to stay home.
Same…
@@petscraftsandwonderfulthin1279 My husband earns enough, so I'm able to be a self-employed writer and speaker on a part-time basis, yet earning enough to cover all my stuff (clothes, food, going out with friends, etc.) Most of the time I work from home, so I make great meals for him and he loves it. But when I was single, I always made sure I had jobs I loved (in the writing field) so I could deal with the bullshit easier. And, boy, was there a lot of bullshit in the workplace. I'm thinking of writing a book, "Bat Shit Crazy in the Workplace." I'd probably get sued though.
Every single time I went to HR, I got fired. Use these companies and dispose of them just like they do to us.
You should of sued for retaliation.
Yeah you should have sued....and you're cute!! lol
@@1229Danielle too broke for that
@@Beth5171 thank you lol
Definitely.
My HR manager specifically asked my if my boss was toxic and if I had any issues. I told her my boss was both verbally and physically abusive. One week later I had been fired. I was 21 at the time and had no idea I could sue. Next time I will take the whole company down with me.
HR are the lapdogs of the C-suite and Board of Directors. I worked for a company that was doing multiple illegal things, including falsifying lab results to the FDA, which resulted in medical tests results being inaccurate. Upper management knew it, and some of the lab managers knew it. The inaccurate test results most assuredly caused deaths and unnecessary drugs and surgery. They didn't care, it was all about the bottom line and their big salaries.
@@MBAinternetmktg I believe you after witnessing Cuomo's lies
@@MBAinternetmktg omg what kind of tests?
@@blkOnyx287 lab tests (assays) done in hospitals and medical centers to determine diseases and other blood markers. The HR manager lied for them and was a go-between for payoffs to keep employees quiet. The company was fined, and the owners sold it and retired very comfortably. One of the BOD was short-selling the stock when he knew that the quarterly report would have bad news.
Wait she asked was she testing you to see if you may give them problems if they have visits cause other may have tried complaining before you prove to be able to speck the truth against who they are protecting but hey your safer not working there.
Jennifer, I should have a CZcams channel on this subject. HR people are dangerous. Employees should NEVER...EVER...go to HR for ANY reason. Here's why:
1. It immediately makes you a
target.
2. It's never confidential. They
will tell your boss.
3. They can, and will, put
anything in your personnel
file.
4. They will take your boss's
side.
5. They will use whatever you
say, and twist it around, to
make themselves look
good, if you have to file a
legal complaint.
6. Most HR people have no
real knowledge of
employment law, or how
and what their company
actually does.
7. HR has a LOT of power.
a) They can fire you for
ANY reason.
b) They can damage your
personal and
professional reputation.
c) They can "infantilize" you
d) Their investigations are
"rigged"
e) You'll be "gaslighted" or
micromanaged
f) You'll find yourself a
victim of "quiet firing".
Thanks for doing this video !!!!@
Every employee should watch channels like this one, to avoid making a deadly career mistake. 😊
I made a report and talked to HR. I said I know the report will be seen by those complained about and it's fine. I don't expect anything from it. I just wanted it reported. When HR gets back to me, I already know it will just be to tell me all the ways I'm wrong. When I leave or get the boot I will leave an online employee review. They fear those
Jennifer has it 100%.
As a recruiter for over 30 years, the LAST person you want to share anything with, is HR. Very rarely are they in it for anything other than their own aggrandizement and career.
Best to handle things on your own. Or leave. On your own terms. Getting HR involved will usually end in having you leave--on THEIR terms.
I reported my toxic boss to HR once and that was when I realized HR was not there to protect me. I left that company quickly and began working for myself
Good to see something good came out of a negative work environment. How are things now?
What type of work are you doing for yourself?
I wished this kind of knowledge found me earlier like 7 years ago when i first started my first corporate job. Watching this while recalling the first time i reported my toxic boss to the head of HR and I'm like OH SHIET what have i done hahahaha.i should know better. Gratz that you're on your path.
Facts. This is exactly what happened for me too
@@marcusmassey965
2 things I've learned when no one replies. CZcams doesn't send them the notification or they are simply just ignoring you.🤷♂️
I took an HR class last semester and the professor summed up HRs job function as to look out for the best interest of the company.
HD(Human Disposal) department that kills private unions.
Makes sense tho. It's to keep the company out of trouble/lawsuit
Right they never help me at all
@@dh6320 does that mean I should get my own lawyer I mean if that's what they charge all about then I guess I have to protect my own ass too.
@@freedomdude5420 bottom line: they are not there to protect you, they are there to protect the company
I agree 100 percent. You have to think of every job as an independent contractor (even though you may not actually be hired as one). You provide your labor as a service to the company, and the company pays you for your time. You are your own separate company, so think of yourself always as a single proprietorship. The HR team is part of the company. Lawyers are part of your single proprietorship. Good luck!
HR are work cops. Remember, you have the right to remain silent and the right to speak to a lawyer!
I feel like this should be shown to soon to be college grads - everyone young and naive thinks HR will help them out of a jam, so so wrong 😑
I've seen a general misaligned expectation about HR, and seen too many people burned. Had to make this video, and trust the CZcams algo to get it to the right people
@@JenniferBrick praise to the CZcams algo!! I'm so glad it got me on your content, I love your stuff! It's so practical and refreshingly honest.
@@JenniferBrick yes, HR in N Ireland used to be commonly known as the staff 'Welfare Advisor.' From my experience, HR don't give a damn about the welfare or safety of the staff and do not enforce policies like Dignity at Work etc. They are being paid to stop the company getting sued for unfair dismissal so they allow bullying managers to discredit people's performance. High staff turnover also keeps them in a job because it means they are continuously recruiting and so it's in their best interests to keep the bullying cycle going because the victim will always leave or be fired and there will always be a position to fill as long as that cycle continues.
This video wouldn't be allowed in a college classroom. College doesn't teach students to stand-up for themselves, those days are long gone. The message in this video goes against the college culture. I know, I work at one. HR for the most part is useless. They work for management.
@@DK-ox3ox I work in a university too and have recently been experiencing some bullying in the workplace and harassment. HR have done nothing except coddle the bully and make excuses for her while I sit at home on sick leave, I'm now prescribed medication and I'm also having counseling because of her behaviour. The lovely statements on the website about wellbeing are not imposed and they don't practice what they preach. We also fail our students because we fail to teach them that sometimes these lovely, whimsical policies are in place for legal reasons to protect against lawsuits and they are only imposed to protect the company not the people.
HR is just the law suit prevention team, nothing more. If it’s bad enough for HR just walk away from your job while you still have decent references.
Having another option lined up never hurts.
Its the worst when you are in HR and your Director of HR is the worst offender. Just leave. Toxic environments never get better.
Yep. I experienced it first-hand. HR threw me under the bus.
Your comment is the best description. I learned my lesson too late.
I had a short male boss who yelled and cursed at me over a call issue. He also almost hit me on the nose with his finger. I dealt with it for several years off/on. Finally, I contact HR just to find out they were only interested in protecting the hospital and not the employee. Needless to say after several years of dealing with this toxic situation, after they told me I was going to have to take more call, I typed up a letter of resignation giving one to HR, the boss, and the administrator of the hospital. In two weeks, I found another position and it all worked out for the best and the short boss finally left after a year.
It's shocking that so many people are surprised to learn that HR is there to protect the company, first and foremost.
I think it has to do with the fact that it's called "Human Resources." Feels like a misnomer
@@szhou009 it wasn't always called human resources,, it used to be called personnel department
I've been in manufacturing sector for 25 years, and this advice is right on point. It takes a long time, and perhaps bad experiences, to learn what you said succinctly: HR is not your friend or advocate. Also, if you leave for another offer, don't air grievances in the outbrief interview. Just leave.
Great advice. They sell a lot of "we care about you" bullshit I think just to attract the ones who will tell on the boss....and then get rid of them. In the last 30 years Ive been working I've only met ONE HR professional who was worth his salt and actually gave a crap. He was excellent.
Yup they don't give a flying fuck, just leave and let the company be the mess they are.
So who IS my advocated in an organization?? If I'm being bullied or harrassed.
@@mannaporanna2678 a lawyer. Get evidence.
@@kathysue9890 lol, that's obvious - I can get a lawyer whatever shit happens in my life but that's not the point. There should be some basic employment laws and institutions that employees can refer to. (even those who can't afford getting a lawyer)
I learned this lesson years ago. One of my co-workers went to HR because our old manager was toxic. That same day, the manager fired my co-worker. HR told him everything, including the identity of the worker that complained. I couldn't believe it back then. Now I realize how widespread this problem is.
Sadly, it is the exact same in all Corporate America. You complain about a thief, they let the thief get away Scott free and investigate in you (the informer) instead.
Saw the same thing happen to a coworker at a university I worked for
Be careful describing someone as "old". That could get YOU in trouble. People ignore Title 7 at their own peril.
Other than that, I agree with your post 100%.
@@steeveekeys1904 I think by old, what was meant is previous.
HR is a bait and switch. Talking to them is like sleeping with the enemy.
It's not always this way but I hope not HR teams do better.
Can you ask them for the # to osha?
The HR staff I contacted were friendly, but I feel I couldn’t trust them
@Asherah 1147 Not at all doll face. I've seen osha in action & I can honestly tell you they scared the shit outta the manager after they took her in a private room. She came out being all nice to us. Make sure you guys take your breaks.
@@matthewsmith2787 Exactly. They're professional backstabbers.
I remember going to the principal of my highschool to deal with bullying. He took the side of the bullies and tried to blame me for my own problems. I’ve learned that any institution, whether it be academic or business oriented is only out to protect itself, not the individual student or employee. If that means alienating that individual because their circumstances make them a threat, whether or not it’s intentional, then so be it.
That to me is the type of purpose HR is about. Protecting the business. A business is about making profit. If the toxic boss isn’t getting in the way, they won’t do anything about them.
Yeah and then these same exact institutions act shocked and devastated when a school shooting or workplace violence were to occur. Also, I’m fairly certain studies have shown that there is a strong correlation between school bullying and poorer school performance. So in a sense the school or workplace itself is affected if it doesn’t take corrective action to prevent and sanction bullying.
@@swnerd-2320 Institutions in general are largely conservative in how they "Handle" conflicts. I don't mean conservative in a political sense. But they don't like changing up the status quo. They say "We have a system." And they get mad when people tell them how much of a failure the system is. Often times punishing the victim for defending themselves.
And as for performance levels, no. Schools and businesses like to blame the student's or employee's work ethic. However, there are other factors to take into consideration such as the amount of sleep students get, homework load, and the unhealthy and unattractive cafeteria food.
@@azazelgrigori9244 There needs to be some kind of reform. Changing the system is hard, but if institutions continue to cling to this conservative mindset they will start to notice a decline in productivity, which is confirmed by studies. Whenever a mass shooting occurs for instance, the media and politicians consider it a gun control issue but don’t look at the root causes (i.e. Was this individual bullied?). Schools and employers do blame individual employees/students for their performance, that is true, but if there is a consistent trend then it doesn’t become an individual problem. The problem is that they don’t seem to address it in the first place and allow it to keep festering.
@@swnerd-2320 Hey, I agree. But I'm a believer in survival of the fittest. If institutions don't make the choice to adapt and make progress, I have no sympathy for them. Yes, there needs to be a reform, but I'm not the one who's gonna tell businesses to change their ways.
@@azazelgrigori9244 I agree, and I’m sorry that you had to experience bullying in high school only to have the principal blame you in the end. 😔 I too experienced bullying, so I can definitely sympathize with your situation. My younger sister had a similar situation as yours when she was in elementary school with the school principal. I use to work at Sears when I was in college and I had a manager there who was particularly unpleasant. Not surprisingly, the store closed a few years later after I left. I certainly felt no sympathy when they closed either. You reap what you sow.
I worked for a Federal government agency: USAID. My boss, a white female did not like Blacks in general as she was hostile to Black people beneath her, and be damned if you had more education than she did, I had and a Black female colleague had so too. She had a PhD. You could almost the while female boss fuming when addressing the Black PhD. I have two masters; one is an MBA, two bachelors and a CPA. She hated me. She always attacked me with work assignments. She had me doing other people's jobs, she would volunteer me for any new thing that came up. It was crazy. I was getting physically ill and mentally stressed and fatigued from her work attacks. Going to HR was a big mistake, and filing an EEO complaint was an even bigger mistake. There was no way out for me. They fired me, and the EEO process is taking years. The government has deep pockets, their own lawyers, and all the time in the world. It has been 7 years since I was fired and every step of the way the EEO process protects the Federal government, not you the discriminated against former employee. I had 18 years of Federal service. Never file an EEO complaint against the Federal Government, they don't care about negative publicity. Your story will not make the news anyway. If you can't endure the suffering, and are unsuccessful in finding another job, (They blocked me for being re-assigned and from getting another job. I should have and I thought about it, but I didn't do it, was go on sick leave for months. I had accumulated a whole year of sick leave time. When I was fired all that accumulated sick leave went away along with my $95,000 per year salary) take all your sick leave time and keep looking for another job. Work hard my ass. America is one big lie.
I would rather trust a convicted criminal with my employment issues than a HR 'professional'.
There are good peeps in HR! But, not all are, and especially not all are empowered to do the right thing.
@@JenniferBrick Its irrelevant whether or not the individual is a good person. The company tells HR how to react to certain issues and the HR department is simply the company muscle to implement their policies. HR people always protect their own jobs first, and as a result are completely useless to the employee. I have been working almost 50 years mainly in offices, and HR has never been on the employees side. If you have a problem, see a lawyer or your government if your country has a human rights for employees agency.
@@RacerX888 I'm sorry that's your experience. Taking this all or nothing mindset that all HR is the same everywhere in the world is just not true. I've saved several employees from terminations or write ups in my time working in HR. These employees don't even know the strings I pulled behind the scenes to do that. HR is also different for different industries, I've observed. I'm not saying it's ok for HR to not care about the employees but some industries I've worked in were extremely harsh which translated into HR was expected to be harsh. I didn't last long at those places. Again, I'm not saying it's right, just my observations. Also, I dislike that there are no regulations on who can work in HR. I've seen secretaries/administrative assistants moved into HR roles with no HR or other appropriate training or education. Employers sometimes prefer to take the risk of someone unqualified than actually compensate and listen to someone formally educated in HR issues and employment law. It's frustrating.
😄
@@NothingToSeeHere1141 Thanks for your insight. I totally agree with your point about who should be allowed to work in HR. In many cases I am describing, including one of the biggest oil companies in Canada, the HR department is staffed with people who have moved around various departments in the company and could not hack it anywhere operational so they end up in HR telling other people how to do the job they couldn't do themselves. This is a BIG problem in HR departments and the cause for a lot of what I described. Also, this is my experience in Canada, and may not be relevant to other countries or circumstances.
From what I've discerned, HR is there to find and get rid of employees who create waves; and, if possible, do it with a smile.
Funny is when they kill the company by doing so since most of the intelligent people do not like to be pushed over.. and in modern world.. either you are intelligent or you do not bring value at all to a company.
@@tiagodagostini exactly. Not going to make their lawless discrimination easy for them.
Ahh yes! Nothing like an HR director to send you a condescending, gaslighting email with just the right amount of passive aggression to show you your place in the pecking order
@@Vin-og2dj That was GLORIOUS!
Now it's there to get rid of men and anyone that doesn't follow their political activist goals and check the right boxes. Skill doesn't matter to them or if the company fails. Bud Light and Best Buy for example openly discriminate.
Basically she’s saying don’t complain if you aren’t being treated fairly. So just accept abuse
Exactly.
Everything that you said is spot on. I work for a state funded college district in California, and once filed a complaint against a notoriously abusive and disrespectful administrator. I was immediately subjected to a performance evaluation, then had termination proceedings leveled against me.... just because I exercised my legal right to grievance procedures in accordance with state law as well as college district policy. Working for government doesn't provide you with any greater protections than working in the private sector. This presentation is soooo important. Thank you!
Our HR actually investigated our toxic boss but just replaced him with another one😂
Yay but then boooooo.
Oh wow
Wow 😳 having 2 toxic bosses one after another might just be you the problem. Just comment.don’t mean 😢 push button.
Wow
Bruh. Mood. At my last workplace, they hired a new manager every 3 or 4 months and always gave another excuse.
I had to find out the hard way that HR protects the company, not the employee. Now, I know it's better to study and learn about a company's culture before you take a job.
Company culture is rubbish.
The culture is making money, that's it.
I work for a company that had anti-bullying policies and zero tolerance for it if you were to believe what they say but i got bullied, raised it and it was tolerated just fine.
In fact I got bullied by a larger number of people for raising it.
No company values it's employees beyond the profit it can make off them.
Or run if you feel a bad vibe
Well sometimes you have no choice but to take the job.
But I think it’s all about seeing the company for what it is and then acting in your own best interest.
I agree but it is also difficult to know the truth of a culture and problems within a co before actually working there.
not so easy-- you can start a job with postive culture and a good boss ( the one that interviewed you and hired you) then due to merger or a restructuring you get a new boss and things go to HELL>>>>>>>
I've always had a chuckle with that industry called "Human Resources",it explains everything in 2 words .
What do we do as a group we call humanity , we just use up resources , and replace them with something else when the current resource is exhausted.
And the narcissistic person is probably going to end up as the boss , that is certain to be a toxic workplace.
I'm in hr and I always work with both the employee and the company to resolve issues. I feel like our job is to walk a tightrope between the needs of the company and the people. And when you do the right thing it's easy to be transparent with your employees and your business. That being said I work at an awesome small business that cares about its people.
Very glad things are going well for you.
HR is the core of toxicity in most workplaces lol 😂
They can create or enable it for sure.
Couldn't agree more!
They work for management themselves not employees!
Yes true. The hr in the made negative points about petty things like drinking cofee and not combing my hire in my evaluation sheet
I am an HR Professional, worked for in a toxic company culture for a toxic HR Manager. After having enough that she is yelling and shouting at me, I resigned with immidiate effect and reported her to the CEO. Then the CEO started to threathen me that he will sue me if I do not go back to work😂😂😂. And this story is about a huge multinational company.
don't go to HR if they are coffee buddies with your boss
THIS !!
Or if they are married to them.
There in bed with the boss they sleep with them all they can never go to human resources at all
When complaining to HR use this your advantage. Make sure that you're not complaining about petty disputes but instead putting them in a position where it goes on record that they chose not to be compliant with the law. When complaining about a toxic boss make sure you have specific examples and document your attempts at communication with them. Make it clear that the behavior from your boss/coworker constitutes a hostile work environment or sexual harassment. Either they will address the situation or you will now have proof you went through the proper legal channels and they failed to comply with the law which gives you ample ground for a lawsuit
Yes!!!
When I worked for a retail department store ,I quickly found out that HR was not on my side. The department manager I was complaining about even told one of my friends, "Who does he think HR is going to side with?" And sure enough, HR took no action but to give me a "now now" talking to. I am happy to say that small chain went out of business.
I like to think that HR purely stands for Handling Reputation....as in the company's reputation. Because, at the end of the day, HR is not your friend because their only job is to make the company look good, even at the expense of employees, protect the company from lawsuits, hide huge turnover rates by talking about the "great" company culture etc.
Now how did you get to be that wise? :)
Visibility is corporate currency, managers will kill each other to look good to their manager and they will do worse to anyone they view to be beneath them.
HR are there to make the company look good to the public so they can get employees through the door.
They can't make a profit if nobody will work for them due to a bad reputation.
The problem is that people don't make them all public and give them loads of visibility.
So the company just continues to destroy people.
People keep quiet to make their lives easy and not get targeted.
Then they move to another company in the hopes that company's better just to find it there as well.
It's a hidden poison that destroys peoples lives.
@@ravenmadd1343 Thank you so much. :) Very well said - some corporations act like high school bullies through HR and middle management. And it's sad that, like you said, most people keep quiet to not get targeted and keep their jobs so the cycle continues. That's how good employees get to burnout and mediocre managers get to lead or tell people what to do when it should be the other way around.
Excellent points…especially with the turnover issue!
Right on target.
HR = Human Rubbish
The HR lady threw me under the bus after coming to her with a concern I had...nothing is confidential with my previous employers.
You've really been through the wringer, friend. And I'm glad to see you hanging here but not that these topics are resonating for you still :(
Nothing is confidential in any workplace
Confidentiality does not exist.. that’s why I write mails. And they hate it. 😁
When I complained about hellish overtime I was pushed into by the department manager to my team manager, he asked me if he should only pass my name or also anybody else's to the department manager, as the person who has complained to him. :D So much for standing up for your own team members, his reputation was all that mattered.
HR’s role is to protect the company from lawsuits
Your content is pure gold and your channel has deservedly become one of my favs!.
Watched a few of your videos so far and you are totally right about your take on workplace related issues including this. Unfortunately, I had to learn these lessons the hard way. Co-workers are not your friends and HR cannot be trusted are 2 extremely important things to understand.
I would also even go so far as to not even say anything in your HR exit interviews as you could be unlucky and have that info passed onto a future company somehow.
One of my most shocking experiences while working in one large multinational company was how harassment was so common as to be almost a company management policy.
This was despite the fact that HR in their onboarding Presentation stated they had zero tolerance to harassment.
This was a global and well known company and obviously these company policies were from the head office but basically ignored completely in the office in this country I live in. All well skilled staff I worked with left there including myself so it shows you how much of a negative impact it has on the company as a whole.
I believe Toxic management in companies these days to be a really serious issue that is not well publicized enough.
I always love stories of when lawyers completely destroy Companies in court for doing employees wrong. HR departments are largely useless and they just gossip and are lazy.
HR' isn't lazy, they are getting paid to do a different job than you think. Their job is basically three things:
1. administer/manage recruitment and terminations.
2. Manage employee benefits.
3. Make sure the company that pays them doesn't get sued.
Expecting HR to protect you is like expecting a car to fly.
I am in this predicament right now.
@@stevenporter863 Ok, so then WHO can protect an employee? Genuine question
@@mannaporanna2678 Who protects employee: Department of Labor makes laws, if companies don't follow then they can get sued. That is where HR comes in - to make sure companies are following laws and protect companies. Think of who pays HR? Why would companies pay someone to advocate against them?
@@stevenporter863 Ok, so if something happens the only way is to go to court. Not the best system to be honest. Also, just because someone pays me it does not mean I protect this person/ institution blindly. Unless in the US it does?
Ain’t no HR or rep messing with me. I make sure to always cover my tracks. Document just like they do. And educate yourself. Knowledge is truly power. When you know your rights you’re untouchable. I dare for them to fire me unfairly or mess with me. I’ll sue them until everyone is held accountable.
Thank you. I wish I knew my rights as an employee and documented every interaction with my former toxic boss. I`v learnt these things the hard way.
That's EXACTLY what you must do. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING
I wish I was better at that I feel guilty when I learned they were poisoning people wasn't an over site they refuse to provide safety And OSHA will not come down and fix a problem until there is a certain amount of death within a certain time period. The company know what they are doing high turn over but long enough to cause side effects the amount of people they keep under a certain amount so there will never be onset of injuries close together.
@@bellam7546 I guess the only thing to do in the way the world is is to start recording from day one even if they seem nice you never now play things back people are good at playing mind games so you need your whole life documented to see if there is a pattern. You can just make it out that your a person that likes to take notes just seeing you do that can prevent someone from targeting you cause you can look back to what was said in every meeting or the exact directions they gave you to do no twisting it into you did follow correct you will have the proof in hand. If there is no toxic person then they have nothing to worry about.
Exactly !!! Give them the " passive aggressive " non threatening threat. If there is such a thing. The best way I've found that can threaten these types is acting, behaving professional from day one. When there is drama, you will always be ready. Work environments should be treated the way the prison system works here in California. Everybody, everyone to themselves and only ally with others if need be to further your cause or protect yourself when it comes to nonsense created by others. I do have to admit that this is a backbone you have to learn with trial and error, experience as you grow older and navigate through corporate world.
I'm a Chicano ( Mexican ) from Los Angeles and grew up in the 90's here. I'll be damned if I let one of these new wave individuals disrespect me without me establishing my presence.
One thing I would recommend from experience is also to work with people who you are familiar within your community. For example, I don't really know what it's like to work with many non mexicans. Therefore, when I'm met with somebody's particular character I judge based on behavior patterns and the way they even talk around other co workers. These are all weapons you can use to your advantage.
Like I said, treated like it's a prison where having your back to one of these coworkers could mean your life and make it clear that any backstabbing will be treated like a life and de*th situation between the two. Then you'll see how tread around you.
Regards 👋🏼👋🏽
As an HR professional, these stories in the comments both break my heart and anger me simultaneously. The role of HR is to balance the needs of employees and the business and it certainly does not mean protecting a toxic manager. Having these types of managers in an organization is a huge liability from a legal perspective and can have a lasting impact on culture that can be near impossible to correct. In a post me too environment and in this recruiting environment where talent is so hard to find, it blows my mind that your HR teams act this way. If this is the way your HR team acts I advise finding a new role ASAP. It speaks a lot to the culture and values of your organization and is certainly not a place where anyone should be trying to build a career.
Thank you for watching and reading through the comments, Megan. I know so many incredible people in HR, who truly care and are doing their best to do the right thing (and even disrupt the industry). But there are some loud and powerful bad actors. In reaction to this video and a version of it I put on TikTok, a group of HR professionals basically lost it on me, and one tried to doxx me... those are the folks that are giving HR a bad rep.
I am a software developer, and the problem with HRs here is they are given power, but they have zero clue what the job consists of, how the work should be done, technologies etc. There is always some miscommunications at the interviews thanks to HR, or some toxicity at the job after the interview. Because, as I said, the HR doesn't know s**t about the job. Finding good software developers is not easy, and the developers know it. So the best ones can afford to show the middle finger at the slightest inconvenience. I've seen an HR ruin a company like that before she got fired. This wouldn't have happened if the HR position was managed by IT competent people. HR is a parasitic job that, at least in the IT field, should not exist.
Most HR departments (bar payroll) around the world are worse than useless. They only care about themselves -- not even the company or the individual.
I've gotten fired for going to human resources was not feeling good one day and i wanted to go home and she wouldn't let me and the supervisor would smile at me and say "I can fire u if u miss one day" i reported her to HR and got fired. I was so pissed
@@noah-qi1bp I know you needed the money but you didn’t need that toxicity… the boss was a real ass hole for that… God bless you.
Great video! We had an HR team, across multiple states but still didn't do a lot. I quickly realized HR is solely to protect the company from lawsuits. If they believe they can get sued, they will step in. I submitted an EEOC complaint and was protected.
If you make a formal complaint to HR about workplace issues, especially bullying or harassment / discrimination, they plan to get rid of you by any means and will not uphold your complaint.
Everything you do is micromanaged and critised under scrutiny. Your work isn't good enough no matter how perfectly you perform.
You get ignored, your work is increased and sabotaged, impossible targets.
You end up taking sick leave for stress then they initiate formal sickness procedure or performance improvement.
Absolutely
YES. SEEN IT HAPPEN SEVERAL TIMES!
It happened to me several times too. They are hoping that you leave yourself before they have to start the process which is more difficult for them.
The scariest part is they can legally hire PIs to harass you into silence.
You summed up my life in one comment. Smfh
HR’s function is to protect the company above all else. Everytime I have seen an employee complain about their boss that employee was eventually terminated without exception.
SO TRUE! I see that all the time too!
Good topic. I have warned at least two colleagues against filing complaints, one male, one female. The male was angry with the site manager (female) for not giving him certain assignments. It did not affect his pay, but they were a little less desirable. The female colleague wanted to complain about the administrative assistant having a bad attitude. I told her to try to just be nice to Assistant. Both colleagues ended up being released a few months after making their respective complaints. The manager nitpicked their performance to justify it. The manager and assistant are still with the company, the assistant got promoted shortly afterwards.
I have a positive HR story! I was working fast food which I noticed in my particular store was a common theme of hiring immigrant and super young people who may not know their legal rights. (Any older non-immigrant woman was always NOT hired even if they applied.)
One issue that really made me upset for everyone was how they scheduled people so you couldn’t have a life outside of work. 6 days a week, 2 hour shifts, last minute schedule changes.. 2nd pet peeve: not allowing your 15 minutes LEGAL breaks per 4 hour shift... Especially for immigrant moms who are too scared to speak up or say no/can’t afford to lose their job.
Legally, in CA, the company MUST give you your 2 week schedule. Regardless, this company would try to make this culture of one week schedule and the 2nd week is a draft or whatever BS. You would get in trouble for “not showing up” unless you had photographic proof of your schedule (so I always did this and stuck by my 2 week original schedule.) Similarly with the breaks. They would try to say you have to ask permission as if breaks were an option but the minute I hit 3 hours of work and did not get my break is when I give myself my break.
Anyway, I would always call HR and tell on illegal and eventually toxic behavior. I even overheard my manager complain she might quit because of HR is “breathing down her neck” (for what, being a toxic no life boss??) At some point though, the manager was bullying/targeting me to bully and I would tell on her depending on if it got illegal and it was hilarious when she would try to erase my schedule and I would call HR letting them know I didn’t see my name on the schedule, am I still employed? Basically forcing my manager to schedule me and I guess she had no reason to fire me since they are always losing staff (cameras also prove I work well) haha. I even got promoted because HR wanted to make sure longer employees moved up the ranks despite my manager trying to not promote me and treat me like I’m stupid. I did quit eventually on my own terms but man, fast food is rough! HR was sweet and understanding the whole time.
Sure, being a manager in fast food is super stressful and I saw them working 60 hour schedules but that doesn’t mean you can treat your employees like shit. I don’t feel sorry for them as much as the regular food workers because they got their livable wage and vacations and CONTROL the schedule and work culture. Maybe there wouldn’t be so much turnover if employees were treated better like say an In-and-out. And for those of you wondering why my manager started bullying me. I believe it was literally cause I came 15 mins early one day they were busy waiting for my shift to start and she tried to ask me to work early and I was like nah I’ll just wait for my shift. Sure it made me look bad but that’s nothing to hold a grudge on IMO. She was (significantly) mean(er) to me ever since!
Why was I working fast food? I heard it’s easy /quick to get work in it and I was still in school. At least they worked around school schedules but I don’t recommend anyone work food unless being a server in a restaurant. It’s less hardwork and more pay (via TIPS). People barely tip fast food workers and when y’all do tip $1, realize it’s being split by everyone working that shift so $1/7 shift workers is not even $0.20 each?? We live in a messed up world I tell you.
I’m in HR and glad to hear this because I strive to do the right thing. I’ve lost jobs because I go against the grain. ❤❤❤
NO ONE GIVES A DAMMM!!!! THAT'S THE TOPIC!!!!
The best thing you shared is HR is not your friend. I’ve witnessed it when someone I knew was harassed by multiple people with witnesses and documentation and HR did nothing!
When you make a complaint to the HR, the company are not gonna retaliate right away. But just remember, there's an annual performance evaluation, and in some companies, there're even quarterly evaluations and semi-annual evaluations. That's when the retaliations happen.
But if your a rule follower there is only so much they can do
Or they'll get you on some unrelated incident.
@@ontologos5768 True.
This is so true! I worked in HR. They are not going to help you... EVER. YOU WILL MAKE YOUR PROBLEM WORSE! Retaliation does, can, and will happen!
THIS!
My mom works in HR and she told me that HR is there for the employer not employees….And even when you have receipts about the wrong conduct, does not mean it will be dealt with in your favor… unfortunately
Thank you so much for this. I tell all my friends and anyone I can entering the work force: HR is not your friend. HR is there to protect the company and identify threats/liability risks. If you are someone who complains, you are a potential liability and they will start strategically getting you out the door.
HR..hell no no no they are NOT your friends! They are the manager's BFF. Been there, done it. Talk about the situation outside the work setting like a coach or a confidant.
Totally agree! I've worked with clients to emergency scripts to de-escalate and save their jobs when HR was preparing to retaliate. I don't want anyone to go through that. One of my only career regrets when I was in corporate was being slow to hire an Coach when I was in a highly political environment (it's like proofreading your own writing, when you're in a situation you can't see it clearly)
Yep they kiss the companies ass and get in bed with them cuz they love the money
i moved job every time i got annoyed with my employer rather than bitching about it, each time i picked up a pay rise - the people who stayed in the bad environment are invariably on less money and less happy with work than I am. Loyalty does not pay, do not expect any and do not give any - unfortunately the world rewards this. If there is a reorganisation or a new opportunity internally - always apply for external jobs at the same time - you are more likely to be confident, perform well and be a good negotiator with multiple options on the table. Treat each interview as an interview training opportunity and work out a plan to deal with anything you mess up in the interview. Before you know it, you will be an ace interviewee, with answers to everything in your back pocket, oozing confidence and negotiating your options rather than taking whats offered. My experience of HR is they are like crocodiles, they smile sweetly while plotting your demise.
I think the primary role of HR is to cover the companies ass and limit liability. Like you said, they're not our therapist, they're not our friend, and they don't care that Claire keeps leaving dirty coffee teaspoons in the sink. They should be called Liability Reduction, not Human Resources lol
In some circumstances it can work to your advantage to talk to them. If Robert from accounts is groping women as they walk past in the hallway, it is in the interests of HR (the company) to get rid of the guy before they're dealing with a lawsuit.
All absolutely true!
I complained about a toxic boss to HR and needed help. HR told my toxic boss EVERYTHING I said. They attempted to usher me out of the company so I asked to step down.
Now that toxic boss is leaving and all of the management staff left after I stepped down. There were multiple employee complaints about verbal abuse and targeting.. nothing was done. This video is spot on!
True! This happened to me also. I sued them and eventually had to drop the suit because it had taken years and my attorney dropped the ball. But back to the past, I was the first casualty in my area or I should say firs person fired in my area in over five years. Nothing was done about my complaints. It wasnt until the second employee was fired months later and another one quit shortly after that my boss was replaced with someone else and my old boss relocated back to his old position. Probably getting served by the court helped out with this. The only satisfaction I take from it is my old boss had the "bad weekend" of getting served and I may have saved the jobs of my former coworkers.
The level of unprofessionalism in Anglo-Saxon countries is just shocking to me. They really have nothing better or more important to do than spreading what you've said to the boss? Wouldn't it be more professional and productive to try to take some action? I'm not saying they have to necessarily be on your side but they don't do any thinking in their brains? They don't consider that an employee could really be bullied? (especially when there is more than one person complaining) All they care about is kissing their bosses' ass? How can you guys agree with such a toxic approach towards work?
Next time do t give your name. Ask to remain anonymous when they ask who’s calling
This is exactly what happened to me…I was sexually verbally harassed at work, and it involved a male manager and a male coworker. I reported to HR with specific time event and people involved. HR told straight to both of them not even thinking how I would be bullied at the workplace and unnecessary gossips that would follow.
I learned this the hard way. I didn’t get fired though, I left because it was useless continuing to work there knowing my boss was never punished.
I'm so sorry to hear that. Better things will come your way.
Very informative. Much of what you said was vital information I really wish I had known before being 40 years old. I left a higher paying job for what I believed to be a better environment only to be pressured into making an HR complaint, it getting leaked back to the employee, and completely destroying my reputation and leading to me feeling uncomfortable to the point I had to quit.
After many years in the workforce, here's my advice: You can't change the environment you work in. The culture has been there long before you showed up and will be there long after. If you aren't happy, or feel discriminated against, find a new job. Start right away. Don't feed into the drama or think you can somehow win. You can't. And even if you--let's say, get a lawyer, sue, etc, you have no idea how long that process takes and how much of a toll it takes on you. I don't think ALL things should be ignored, but for the most part, keep your energy focused forward and get out. Don't make waves, don't bad mouth anyone or gossip or trash anyone. Just keep it to yourself, find another job and get out.
I got covid because HR/my boss refused to send a sick coworker home who asked to be sent home. Half my family and I got it as a result. Shows you just how much HR cares about employees.
@Diana Prince I can?
@@ms_cartographer I'd say you would have some sort of recourse. I'm in HR and that is absolutely appalling. Sometimes I wonder how HR people survive. It's like many of them are so ignorant of the laws they are supposed to be trying to keep that they are more a liability to the company then the employees!
@@ms_cartographer report it to the CDC and contact an attorney
@@lemonlemon7186 I called the anonymous hotline.
@@ms_cartographer Good luck!
To me it's not being my friend. That's not their reason for existing. It's about doing what they should be doing; specifically, being there for everyone. My experience is that they're usually going to stick up for the top brass and sweep the little person under the rug.
Yep, in most companies they protect the company first. There are exceptions, and some awesome HR people out there being loud about disrupting HR so it serves the people, but it's got a ways to go in most cases.
All work places test your morals and character. The one thing that gets people to go “Judas” on someone, it is “job security”. Expect HR to have their pockets and wallets aligned with the company. As it said, “don’t bite the lending hand that feeds you”.
The game of survival of the fittest has only changed from sticks and stones to law, money, and suits.
@@chaotic2insanity No such thing as job security.
@@Chris-tg3qy True but not many are foolish enough to risk playing on the opposing side. Most will play the long game until their “job security” is in question. If I got mouths to feed and other financial responsibilities then bet on me doing everything to please the boss.
Well yes but remember that they are just employees like you and don't have nearly as much input in firing or other decisions as you may think. It's a bit unrealistic to expect them to put their own necks on the line in every situation. They are there to help keep the company out of legal trouble. If you have a problem with your boss and your boss isn't doing anything illegal they are not likely to take your side.
HR dept at my work got cleaned the F out last year and for very good reasons too.
There’s way too much to type but it involved HUGE violation of ethics, drama, sex (yes, no joke) and very, very bad decisions including enabling a very toxic work environment. The big one was misusing their authority for personal gain/favoritism; HUGE liability. Oh, and they lost an unemployment case and rightfully so. The company GM and President cleaned house big time and it was long overdue.
Edit: HR can be very corrupt.
Other than pay processing they have no use at all, they don't even know basic labour laws. HR is a total joke. Just pay a team of interns will do, HR is worthless otherwise
HR:
- Make you feel special at your interview
- Generate en demand the filling in of many forms
- Store but ignore forms
- Forget you ever existed once hired
Friends suggested I contact HR about my toxic manager and of course they took their side. I kept getting written up so I stepped down and gotten a minimum wage and just quit the job yesterday
The real problem is they dont how to solve a problem in a fair manner- company, management qnd people
I'm so sorry you had this experience, queenkolelux.
So sorry to hear about this, queenkolelux. Lots of people really don't know how bad HR really is. So of course you thought you'd get the help you deserve...
Lesson is avoid going to HR.
Speaking as HR professional here. I only work for companies which are genuinely concerned for its people. When management changes and becomes toxic, I'm the first to leave.
Sending you a virtual high five for making sure you're intentional and aligned.
Thank you for upholding what's right!
This is what I am building towards.
Same here. Rare companies work that way so the list is small but worth it
Same! I'm glad I have a great HR team now that holds up what's right but my manager and I are both leaving. Organisation no longer aligns with our goals.
Thank you for acknowledging that some places don’t have an HR team. Years ago I worked for a small company and reported directly to the CEO. She was so abusive. Constantly shouted at me for small mistakes. One night she wouldn’t let me leave the office until 10pm. Friends, family, online articles, etc. every piece of advice was “just go to HR”. It was so frustrating!
I don’t trust companies that don’t even have an HR team. It’s 10x’s worse.
This is not helpful to employees. As someone who has worked in HR it was very frustrating when I learned of a "toxic supervisor" which had been misbehaving for a long time but no one reported it. HR was late taking action because we did not know. Advice like yours perpetuates problems like this.
HR person WAS my direct boss. It was a nightmare. That's a position where people really try and abuse their power.
Reporting my toxic boss to HR was actually beneficial, in my case. I have since retired, but my organization took my only complaint in over 30 years very seriously, and the head of HR was looking to avoid my filing a lawsuit! Know your rights! The tyrant was actually demoted and relieved from supervisory duties.
You are my superhero!!
JUSTICE! I love this!! Good for you!
I like your explanation and will definitely be sharing this video. One thing I always tell people is, like you said, HR is there for the company. Some companies realize that means protecting employees is important and a good thing, but most don't.
There was 1 lady who was HR.
I learned the hard way
HR is not your friend.
Honestly, I NEVER dealt with HR on any job other than signing paperwork at the beginning of a job
It wasn’t UNTIL I worked at this last job that I felt compelled to go to HR about the toxic manager and work environment.
BIG mistake!
One company I worked at had HR put out an employee questionnaire to everyone on the factory floor. At the end of the questionnaire there was a space requesting the “anonymous” employee to write down any complaints about anything or anyone no matter how harsh. I did not participate because I knew better. Later I noticed that those coworkers that confided in me the complaints they wrote down were later subjected to adverse working conditions and even outright harassment. How did they know who wrote what? By matching the handwriting with samples on file.
Yep, I've heard of this traffic used too many times and it's shady AF IMHO
Mo
Printed caps if I ever fill one out then
All HR surveys can screw you, only give management the highest marks then you will get a raise next round.
Always type your confidential letters ✅ thank you
A young empathetic HR lady approached me in a corridor to ask what was wrong because she could see I was distressed. I told her about a bully. She then told her boss, a cold manipulative hr b*tch who did everything she could to prove that it was a "conflict of personalities" and even advised the bully how to wiggle out of trouble and launch a smear campaign against me, making up lies about my performance and behavior. There was no evidence of any of that but a lie repeated enough times.... Anyway, I got smart afterwards and made hr and the management do something when I brought tangible evidence of his abuse. Don't trust hr, even the nice and empathetic ones can get you in trouble and don't think that your co-workers will have your back because everyone hated the bully but nobody spoke up when hr turned against me
You honestly can’t trust anyone at work… if you choose to. Limit it to no more than 1-2 employees. Because when shit hits the fan you will automatically know who tried getting you fired
So sad.
I'm going through the same shit about the bully boss but haven't went to Hr yet as I have this gut feeling that nothing action would be taken
Your mistake is thinking she's really "empathetic". For all you know she's the one backstabbing you. HR ppl have no real work to do, they have plenty of time to create drama during work hours
Basically went through the exact same thing. So wrong
the role of the HR is to defend "the good name" of the company and kick your ass out of the company when any small issue with your performance or attitude arrises.
Documentation is incredibly important. I agree with your suggestions, Jennifer. Also, if your manager files a complaint, be proactive in responding with your evidence. Don't expect HR to be effective mediators who will ask to hear your side. If you're not proactive, they will assume that the manager's take is what happened. The manager isn't required to provide proof. If you keep in mind that HR's role is to protect the organization as is mentioned here, you'll protect yourself.
Try to work with the toxic boss if you must. Don't complain to HR or colleagues. Vent with friends you don't work with and don't know anyone from your job.
And most importantly: action an exit strategy.
Complaining and being miserable will make your life miserable. You deserve more than that, everyone does 💜
I find, no matter how nasty your boss is, be friendly and polite and try and buck them up
After working in recruiting/hr for 10 years, my sense is HR is the source of gaslighting and models/teaches that to management...
My best advice to survive a toxic environment is to study your enemy, learn all that you can about them. Approach them with what they expect so as to lower their guard that they may be careless and slip up. All warfare is based upon deception. When they come at you strong, appear weak so that they may grow arrogant. I quite fancy the art of war by Sun Tzu.
No one at work is your friend, they only appear that way when they want a favor or something from you that they should be doing them selves.
If the workplace is unionized, then going to the union is another option. The union at my workplace is not afraid to advocate and offer legal advice.
Having a union on your side can be a big help!
No they don't
Not all unions or union reps are on the employees' side.
My father worked for a job that had a union and the rep was in bed with the incompetent management (figuratively). And don't get me started on OSHA...
@@mbird01 so true I had issues the union said well we won't help you.
I wish my job were union.
learned this lesson the hard way when my boss was massaging my shoulders and making sexual advances towards me. document everything, request appropriate action and don’t be afraid to get a lawyer or get intimidated by higher ups in the company.
Does he still do it?
HR's primary role is to, well "manage human resources", so to make sure that people employeed in the company use their resources in a most efficient manner.
The main part of that being ensuring that people are skilled+motivated to do their work at a smallest cost (salary+training costs) possible.
So to go a complain to HR only makes sense for you in a very specific cases ie when you can prove that company's business will benefit from it direclty (and not you as the employee). It's possible if you have a certain level of power and strong relations within stakeholders in the situation.
I think if there's a toxic situation in your workplace, the best option is to look for another job and/or seek legal advice depending on severity of it. Trying to fight it with a toxic manager via an HR team that doesn't fight on your side won't profit you professionally.
HR's secondary role is administrative to , take care of formal side of employment, to manage contracts and other paperwork aspects.
tl;dr HR is not your friend. HR is to ensure that the paperwork is done and that business is getitng the most benefit from the employees. Never vice versa.
I was physically assaulted. I decided not to charge the person. Hr turned the script and I became an instigator
You hit another "home run" with this one! You are absolutely correct; most work places are toxic to the point of poison to the soul and will "kill" a person if stay too long in that environment!
That is me.
Some places legit have poisons gasses that they refuse to use protection oddly they have it in rooms with no windows or vents
@@karmenjane1257 hey..
One good thing about being "old" is that you learned this stuff a loooooong time ago! Trust no one because everybody has a price tag around their neck.
You know 7 billion people?
@@2_572 Yes.........and my parties are catered. And don't throw your coat on my bed!
@@2_572 Do you work an office job? Than you'll know he's absolutely right and most people are only loyal to themselves and their interests.
@@stoopidnametag Most not all.
And I hope bitter selfish people did not cause you to put the seed of bitterness and selfishness in you peace be with you and be fair to yourself.
When HR tells you that what you are telling them is confidential......BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! That's a good one.....
Jennifer you are 100% spot on. HR is not your friend.
I just complained to HR about my boss and a co worker three weeks ago. A couple days later I decided to put in my two weeks notice. Immediately after speaking with HR I knew this would just be a pointless battle.
Screw the two week just up and leave
@@mercedeswilkins5566😂. I gave one week’s notice. Treat people well.
Just get another job, lawyers are expensive & unless the employer settles one can be in court for years. See the handwriting on the wall, get all the experience you can & leave. It’s difficult to know a company’s culture & managerial competence until one gets hired but trust your early instincts and create an exit plan before that toxic boss gets you in their cross hairs.
There are red flags you can watch for (I have a video here on them).
Agree lawyers are expensive. I was happy to work with mine when I started new organizations and when I was fired for being female. I ultimate decided against filling a suit, but he helped me negotiate my exit. Exit packages are hard to have clarity on because they depend on location, level, industry, etc and may be confidential. Employment lawyers deal with them regularly, so it can have ROI. That was of course my personal experience and *not legal advice* lol
@@JenniferBrick 👍
This is the absolute best advise. Lawyers are very expensive and the deck is stacked against the employee. Even in the best cases, (hostile work environment), the best HR can do is fire the offending employee. They cannot change the culture of the company, or all the people who allow/tolerate the behavior across the company. Just find a better job and do the best you can to have a great life. It is the best revenge you can exact on a former employer, or anyone who does you wrong. In the end YOU will be the biggest winner and feel empowered because you took control of your career/life, as opposed to accepting living with the victimization.
@@Cthames123 yes, I find myself telling younger workers this a lot lately. While hostile environments always end up failing, it takes a long time. I got out of a toxic job just last year, negotiated an exit package & now have a great job. And I think the key is not to take it personally as this really impacts the ability to think logically & make it a priority to have an emergency fund because you must have the ability to walk out to retain your power.
🎯
Great video, I'd add check if your company has an Ethics & Compliance page to anonymously submit any complaints with the facts of your situation. I did this with a toxic boss I had, when I submitted my resignation on my last day of work I submitted a complaint to E&C. I later found out another employee did the same thing and boss got in a lot of trouble.
I worked for a company a few years ago. Day one, they expected me to know how to work a machine I had never seen before (while I was still trying to learn where the bathroom was) and was very demeaning (when I was unclear on an instruction, they legitimately asked if I understood english).
I went to hr at the end of the day and respectfully said I wasn't a good fit. They admitted they had a culture problem and begged me to give them another chance so I did.
The next day, nothing had changed so at lunch I said it still wasn't a good fit, and asked if they wanted me to leave then or finish out the day. They asked me to at least finish out the day so I did.
I turned in my equipment to the HR rep and thanked them for the opportunity. They were polite and thankful also, and I thought all was good... just a mismatch, no harm, no foul.
An hour later, I got a call from the employment agency who got me the job, and the company said I had "walked out" which looked very bad on me. Lesson learned, don't trust HR. They will smile politely while they stab you in the back.
My HR rep is quite the opposite, to which I’m very thankful. She makes herself available and cares about how we are feeling personally and mentally. She’s always concerned about how I'm doing (my job is highly stressful), so she’ll check-in and ask how’s everything going. She advocates for us employees, and she listens to all employee grievances and brings them up to the appropriate person. She's understanding, and best of all, she's friendly and approachable. I’ve never felt like I couldn't trust my HR rep. I’m sorry to hear about all the other posters who’ve had terrible HR reps. There are good ones out there. Anywho, this is my two cents regarding my HR rep.
This is the way HR should be! I'm so glad you work with a great HR professional.
@@JenniferBrick I was very close to a mental breakdown, and I was ready to quit, but my HR rep called me and suggested to take a leave of absence instead. I came back feeling better. If it weren’t for her caring and valuing my worth in the company, I wouldn't be in the company at this moment. I think there needs to be a change where HR reps are not only protecting the interest of a company but where they are protecting and advocating for the company's employees.
An example of an honest HR person. Unfortunately, they will soon be let go.
What industry do you work in? And is it private or government owned?
Great to hear, just shows they are not all bad
From my experience, they filter out perfectly strong candidates during recruitment for arbitrary reasons and end up with the wrong person for the job.
Sounds like Uhauls IT department guidebook. I was brought on by people who knew their stuff. Shortly thereafter however they left and I was left with the most incompetent dotes with whom I have EVER had the displeasure of working. The thing that I find funny is that once coof hits, I among a couple other hard workers are let go. They kept the employees who avoided their jobs. Let them fail. Time for a new company to sprout. Uhaul is a trash company with nothing but trash management. Favouritism was pretty strong there too.
I remember once I went to HR for one of my old jobs cause they cut my pay for switching to another position (even though I had experience for it) and when I started that position they had me work that new position only 3 times in three months. For the rest of the days I did my old job while getting payed less. I figured at the time the best option would go to HR and see what they can do, but what ended up happening was they told my boss and my boss got mad at me for going to HR before her.
Best part was when they decided to give me retro pay they said they would not pay me for the first two weeks, so I got upset and went to my boss and I was told I should be grateful I'm getting anything. Needless to say my experience in the workforce as been pretty much like that for 8+ years.
Here's my guess 3 minutes into the video:
1) to recruit and bring new employees onboard
2) to ensure that the company and the employee are not out of compliance with federal, state and local employment laws
3) to protect the company from any legal liability in regards to worker issues
I have been saying this FOREVER!!! HR’s job is to protect the firm- period. They also typically are not great at hiring either; they are only good with policy. It’s why they can never find employees that fit. Most of them don’t even really understand or know the position for which they are hiring. I’ve known HR staff to say this outright.
Thank you. I feel like wal mart's HR was no help at all
This is true
Well, that's because they don't have superiors who would require this knowledge from them.
I was discriminated against due to differences in political opinions. I went to HR to complain about a couple of my managers who were constantly lying about me and saying that I wasn't doing my job when I was. I was even staying longer after I was supposed to be off, to make sure that all the tasks were completed. I even was faster than some of my coworkers. Everyone else, besides the main management, was confused when I got laid off. It's always like that though, after I've been discriminated against at a few different places because I do work my butt off. I put my all into any work. I help and get along with my coworkers to the best of my ability. I made the mistake of going to HR about it and my guess is maybe because they were a protected group, they didn't like my opinion and allowed them to lie about me continuously. They preferred to believe them over the issues that I was facing or didn't care. I didn't know that this was going on behind closed doors. So I was also dealing with workplace bullies and deceit. I didn't realize that HR was going to go to the other managers about it and basically trying to put me out of work within only a few months of me starting there. They went as far as to lie about me being fired. What's more, even to this day, I am blacklisted from working at this specific place. They tried hiring me a little while back in an entirely different state and I was even as far as a little past the interviewing process and was reportedly told that I could not work there. They had written me down as a threat or something to their business. Never trust anyone in the workplace. Period. Don't tell them crap.
New at my job and a coworker is narcissist on steroids. Learning meant having her raising her voice at me, pounding my computer keys and poking at my screen so hard the plasma was about to splatter. Rude comments, mocking, comments like "you've been here like 3 months?" Actually only 2 months and during all the holidays. My trainer promoted and no back up plan. I was at the mercy of who could stop and answer my questions. I asked for a meeting with my lead and her boss. Ya went so well. So I don't bother the toxic chick. I ignore her. She's loud, obnoxious and sucks the air out of the tiny office we are in. About the size of a living room and 8 cramped wedged in desks. Some days I think my head will explode. This woman hated me from day one. I don't care to be friendly with coworkers. happy to ignore her and do my job.
The hate fest she has going on, is getting old and very childish on her part. 🙄
I became and entrepreneur in early 2020. I watch these videos to motivate me and feel gratitude.