If You Want To Find The Perfect Guy, WATCH THIS | Matthew Hussey
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- čas přidán 21. 07. 2024
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This is soooooo true. I started ruthlessly cutting out the wrong guys faster in the last 6 months and I have found someone who is everything I’ve ever wished for now.
Everything I ever wished "for now" yikes.
And you might not be everything he wished for, so don’t create this confidence in you just because you found someone
Good for you🙂
@reeree what am I jealous of ?
I am also applying this same logic dating the complete women... instead of wasting our time on a potential
“Time is the treasure of all of our lives. Don’t waste it on the wrong men”
It’s important to be clear what you want in a guy. Don’t compromise your values if he’s not what you want. You deserve better
Yes! Let them go immediately if it doesnt align. Plenty fish in the sea 😎🤌🏻😏
@@lm5608 lol Bad website..For some.
You go queen.
How do turn the guy down without hurting there feeling?
Dont wanna hurt the wrong guys feeling and then they turn into a creep or stalker it's happened once before to me.
It’s hard to remember and apply this
Thank you for calling things out. If a man can't get on the phone with you, then "he's a child." It's also a wake up call for any of us who are adults. We need to be able to talk on the phone!
That's not true. Some people have phone anxiety..they cannot talk to you on phone unless they really feel comfortable. We cannot put all men in a single box, that's not fair
Matthew I wish I would have heard your messages years ago. I have been in 2 abusive marriages and almost 5 years ago left one I spent 36 years in. So many red flags. Now I’m 71 and would be terrified to every take a chance on a relationship. I love being on my own and have such freedom. I hope all these women that get to see you live take it all in and follow your advise. We deserve the best. Just listening to a tragic death of a young Canadian woman (I’m Canadian) killed in Britain by a boyfriend she met on line and went to visit. Anything on line is never where I’m going. But thanks for being YOU!
Dear Karen,
I love interacting with experienced people like you. You have so much beneficial knowledge and wisdom to share with us, ma shaa’ ALLAH.
الحَمدُ لله
The life in this world is temporary. It is a test.
After we die, ALLAH will resurrect every human on THE DAY OF JUDGEMENT.
Jannah(Garden of delight) is eternal. Life in Jannah is eternal. ALLAH WILL Gift
every woman in Jannah a spouse.
Do read the Qur’an. The Qur’an is the Final Book sent by ALLAH for the entire humankind.
Sending u much love ❤ ❤❤
❤❤❤
I have been creeped out by guys who seem to really like me in a very short time and became a little bit obsessive, but I know that they don't actually know me at all, so to me, they must have made me up in their head - who they think I am is in their imagination. It was very scary.
I have been here too.
I'm like I'm not that kinda girl.
Time to search for good Christian man that truly respect me as woman not one not stand sorry not me...!!!
The more you focus on trying to find "someone" the more it won't happen, go out and be the best version of you and it falls into place at the right time
Yep and when happy there they come to bother you. Lol. Im setting my sights on being alone for a year. Too much isolation before meeting someone and being on meds let me walk into toxic. Or i gave up or compromised. I went a long time without looking but im shooting for the long haul, i aim a year.
Sadly we live a pandemic of narcisist women and men
Yeah I cut off the wrong guys very quickly and have gotten closer to meeting the right one. I've also experienced guys being too interested too soon and yeah you can sense that they're trying to fill some void.
Matthew Hussey should be considered a philosopher. Great insight.
I so happened to have done face timing a guy who wanted to meet me for a coffee date. At the age of 52, he is still housesitting for different friends for over 6 months, I don't think I love the energy and I don't see myself being with someone who is not established at his age at all.
I'm happy I suggested us to do video call tonight, it saved our effort and time in meeting up in person.
Wow Matt!This is soooo powerful!I am in Africa(South Africa) and we are taught as Women to be “grateful” that a Guy has chosen us.SCREW IT!I go against the grain.If you’re going to deserve my time,EARN it.Invest in me,us and what we could be.Otherwise I walk.Simple.What I AM is WORTH its weight in gold and I’m sorry for you as a Guy if you don’t make me FEEL like you are worth a second thought.Most amen in Africa are not committed to invest and so I am MORE committed to valuing myself and my happiness and it’s okay that I’m Single.I LOVE myself way too much to bother.🤷🏽♀️
“People like to buy, not to be sold.” I really like that!!
P.S Matthew, your message to your fiancé was so heart touching and romantic , that it made me wish to hear that kind of message from someone in the near future too.🥰
@@nufffalready8266 he doesn’t have a fiancée, what is this girl talking about 😂
By by
Yes Matthew, Teach us! How is this content for free? Unbelievable. Thank you so much.
I love the legal disclaimer - dump, NOT murder! 😂
I wish I'd known this when I met my narcissistic ex 16 years ago!
He was never happy, always chasing the next thing.
They should teach this stuff in school!
Love that you condensed your short videos into a longer one 🙏
You are so grounding and teaching me so much about being grounded in reality. I watch a lot of your videos and love your assertive approach to relationships. Although I am not dating, it is a pleasure to watch you and learn for the time being when I do date...Thank you!
All of this stuff is way too complicated. I met my fiancé, we both work (clearly) and had hobbies so we spent time together in our free time and he was the one pursuing me. I didn’t hold myself back or not, I got to know him and vice versa… If I had to pay so much attention to what I was doing, how much or how little both of us were putting out and gauging it all? Worrying about whether or not he thinks I like him more than he liked me or the opposite of me deciding he likes me too much?? I’m great and I love myself so why would I think while getting to know someone that they like me too much? My gosh LOL I would just stay single forever if I was currently single because this is all too much. So glad I am not out in the dating world anymore.
Loved this video, Matthew!! You're hilarious! I do agree about the facetime scenario! It's a big red flag when someone doesn't want to do this. Next!
"You don't know shit about someone until u meet them in person".....This, THIS is why I have never and will never date online. It is ridiculous. So all those who get abused stolen from, tricked online I never have any sympathy for.
This is a phenomenal video! Really encouraged me to expand past my comfort zone and take a leap of faith towards my own happiness 😊
I really want to say thank you. Thank you to make me think in a positive way even after a hard day. Your work is precious to me. Thank you
This is Gold-dust....Gold-dust....Gold-dust Wisdom! ⭐⭐⭐⭐ Thank you both Hussey brothers!..💫
Yes, all you have said is true. LDR can be strange. I don't know if he really liked me or just trying to fill up his emptiness, That he is missing his former partner. And trying to find it in other's presence..He once said that he can't forget his late wife because she have taught him so much in life. And later on he said he have opened his heart and he let me in. Does he really have changed? Or just trying to fill up his loneliness.??
These videos are both helpful and reminders that dating is an overwhelming process for me😅
This! This is what got me to the love of my life with only one year of dating! 17 first dates and ther she was ❤
I used to be that & can’t imagine being that way again. Waiting for the phone to ring, obsessing about the guy who never invested his time, overvaluing who he was because of his position even though we never really dated regularly. Very attracted but I would call & call to get attention & the further he went.
Mathew..It SO IMPORTANT people are whole themselves first before seeking fulfillment elsewhere. I worked hard on healing after the end of 25years married to my best friend. I never went online to dating site but I was on a Poetry site Rumi. I clicked with a Professor..his romantic poetry melted my ❤. One day he asked if he could pm I Messenger. The poem was for me? A year later I can say with confidence that dreams can come true. Marrying next Christmas. Blessings Ladies an Gentlemen. Participate in life..your soulmate is out there
Congratulations Mathew! You deserve to be happy.
This guy is awesome! I need this information many, many years ago!
This was powerful and had the perfect timing. THANK YOU
Thank you for doing this team! I wonder how a world where all women are high value and firm boundaries will look like. Would men start behaving better?
My greatest flex is my cutoff game. If he's not reciprocating or worse, is accustomed to threesomes and more (today's men), I'M OUT! I love that I have no attachment but in 2022, people date so differently its scary. The world is depressed and if we can't get a hold and healing on mental illness that is rising, none of this advice is going to work. Thank you for sharing your gift even if it helps one person.
"Invest and test" are your own words in an other video makes me understamdi what you mean in that Video. I am glad I have found your profound teaching that complete Christian teaching I have also heard on youTube. WE are capable to listen Life gives US the Lessons WE need to hear at the right timing.🌅 WE might Had wasted our time but IT No more important when WE Start to listen and to See Life the way IT IS. 💐
I thoroughly enjoyed this! I've been in situations where I was the one giving so much because of my own insecurities and wanting a relationship that on an unconscious level it didn't matter who the person was. I have been spending time working on myself. I have waisted a lot time with the wrong men... not anymore! I'm excited for what 2022 holds:)
Good for you. Put you and your needs first always that's my hope for you and me
Your so much intelligent. I like the fact that your research is always accurate. I have been dating and not knowing how to handle a relationship or drive to a beautiful relationship. Unbelievably beautiful of you. Thanks
Nobody is always accurate not even scientist and intellectuals, you are idealising
I definitely love your content. It's so helpful. Thanks for sharing this ❤️
I also love the content but now a days there is no one have time to openly talk about real things about relationship with a girl
Thanks for the humor! Such a welcome lift to my spirit.
After purposely being strung along and manipulated by my ex of 6 years (2 proposals to manipulate me into staying!), I have learned my lesson. This might cost me not being able to be a mother one day... and yes, I ruthlessly go "next" now, and I haven't found the right person yet, but at least I'm not investing so much time and love into the wrong person, letting my heart be broken, then have to grief and try to heal, etc. No, I at least have peace of mind, and yes, it sucks being single, but it sucks even more being with the wrong person.
This is absolutely brilliant. Made so much sense. Thank you so much
Hahahahaha…that calf part cracks me up. 😂 My girlfriends do exactly that, focusing on the one guy that isn’t even worth a second of their time, but jump the instant those guys that aren’t showing any interest send them a pathetic “hi” text message once in a while. Definitely passing this video onto them.
go for the person that wants you around when you are in a good loving mood, going towards them, when you are you.....don't go for the person that is always paying attention when you are grumpy, leaving them, hurt by them...Why...because you'll always have to be grumpy, leaving or hurt to get some love from them...Is that the life you want?
You are open and loving and they are happy to be around you....that allows for you to be you and be enough.
right. If the person is not showing interest from the first date, it's ok to move on. Not even a second chance,
I love this video. Thank you both. (I wish the volume were louder...:-)
Love it xxx Something to consider as well. Autistic women don't know how to read the room and can make mistakes with coming on to hot or too cold. We need to be specifically taught, which is where your videos are priceless. Thank you.
This was incredibly helpful and very accurate
Thanks a lot
It's a sign for me ....tanks 🙏
Love you a lot Matthew ❤
You are now with a VIBE.
THE MATHEW VIBE😘
The perfect guy may be the one, or more than one, that you blew off.
Your perception of the present person comes from your past experiences, not from the present person…..if you don’t give it enough time. You’re welcome ☺️ 😊
Wym?
@@paolanamuncura8879
Many people judge other people in the present based on their past experiences. This happened to me just a month ago, when I thought I was genuinely falling for a girl. I overshared my intimate experiences from the past and she decided she had had enough. While what I did was wrong, immature and stupid, I was coming from pure intentions - I was frustrated that I had only had dysfunctional experiences before taking to her, and that it finally felt genuine, so I basically put her above anyone else in a very dumb way... but she made up all these stories that I was thinking about these girls instead and that I was not ready to settle down, so she got up fed up and decided that we should stop talking. I tried explaining that it comes from insecurity and tried fixing it a few times but she was way too stubborn for that, so it only got worse since she claimed she "obviously wasn't enough" for me to talk about that... as if telling stupid stories about dysfunctional situationships that taught me a lesson meant that I was cheating on her or something... So yes, most people judge the present based on their past.
@@Incognit0777 agreed. Thats call ego
@@paolanamuncura8879 Yup, exacty. The Ego can make us miss out on good opportunities and relationships.
This is what men who are used to trying to beg women to settle for less say
Great Matthew, you are so right. Thank you very much !
Matthew this is really good you can have a passing fancy but don't get obsessed. I really can't relate to "dating apps" long story short I've been with my boyfriend since 2007 never used one lol
I dated a guy with the perfect body, and 80% perfect sex, but he had mental issues that crossed the line into hurting me. What a waste of a man :/
That resonated with me babe n so many levels “unattainable” the moment you accept them you’re no longer wanted. I’m new to dating and it’s proven to be so daunting.
I am a demi/asexual guy and as strange as it sounds, this is incredibly helpful for me. I need a very very VERY specific person given my inability to provide 1/3 of the relationship triangle (companionship, physical, romantic). I also am extremely picky based on the vibe of a person. If the vibes don't match, then I'm out. Therefore, I really need the perfect person.
In the same way that many women have gone through many men, I've gone through both many men and many women. None of them to this point have proven to be the perfect person for me, but the problem all this time was that I've been attempting to settle for less than what I want, instead of ruthlessly cutting people out in order to find the match. I would spend weeks at a time thinking about them, considering if I should message them, imagining a fairy-tale scenario with them, but the truth always was that they weren't the person for me. If I had video chat with them for AT MOST five minutes, I could've realized they weren't for me, instead of investing so much extra time into them.
Alas, the problem I encounter now is one of scarcity. I am quite literally terrible at meeting new people, never mind asking people out, for the most part because I am not vibing with rejection right now. I am really good at interacting with people, but I am really bad at meeting someone out of the blue with minimal context. I fear I'll be seen as just another guy trying to get in their pants, which is ironically the exact opposite because I have absolutely zero interest in the physical side of a relationship.
What a great lesson!
This is a great collaboration!!!
Cheers👍👍
Super....just super...
Its just what i wanted to hear...cut people off quickly...the time wasters & energy suckers....wish we can identify them real quick
The only thing i didn't do all these years is expanding my life
Thank YOU so much Guys, U made my Day🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
A very useful video .thanks alot to both of you .
What do you think when I a guy says he just wants to have fun with you, after you tell him you're just looking for friends, and he says I'm looking for more than friends, and u say I'm not ready for a relationship, and he says he doesn't want that he just wants to have fun with you, what does that mean? Is that bad?
This was a good one, thank you :)
Hate facetime! I feel self conscious and changes my personality. I just do call and meet up if call seemed solid.
I had a boyfriend like that where he was into getting me but not into having me. I found out from my brother a few days ago. That he was also stalking and I wasn't surprised. I was pissed! He thought of as an object or prey like an antelope.
I got so much value from this... thankyou 😊
there were way too many ad breaks... :\ so one thing about the showing interest and repelling, there is the issue of pacing between different people (and attachment style...) and said person is ready for a relationship.. but just now with you
Eh eh, this is soo hilarious yet sooo true, blessed be Matthew x
I am also applying on dating the right women! date the complete person, not potential(s)
5:08 most intimidating girl ever, I love her 🤣🤣🤣🤣
How to move on from his past interactions with women he was interested with when they still exist…. What to do when you catch your guy giving her that look of affection and denying it when questioned
I generally really dig your touchy feely process of getting to the kernel of truth in a situation and you've given me many valuable insides into what makes people tick. But I think you've been overthinking it on this one.
The user generally does not dwell on what the givers problems, issues or motivations are - they just take. Many of them do not even realize that they are only taking and sucking the life juice out of the giver - or hurting them deeply, and most tend to think that all is fine and hunky dory. The wake-up call comes when they are put on the spot about whether this is a developing relationship or just a situation-ship! That's when they realize that there are deeper expectations from their partner, that there will be restrictions if they continue, and probably drama, confrontations, tears and accusations - - - and that's when they bail - - - before it can ever come to that.
To be fair - there are the ones that simply look at the issue, and decide that it's too much work and/or that they are not willing to curb their freedom to go exclusive [which in reality simply means that this is not the right partner for them, or that they have other goals in their life at this time]. But again - I don't see the level of deep thinking/diving deep that you have attributed to that problem in the video, in most run of the mill/every day type of people.
Finally somebody with a clear thought process, well articulated and explained. Bravo 👏 👏
“Dump” not “murder”. Thank you for clarifying
The murder footnote :D Well if it takes being ruthless then I am on my way lol. Yep I just didn't respond to a guy I really liked a few months ago, cuz clearly not what I thought 🙄
i love you matthew thank you soo much for this video
I feel seen and attacked. lol I needed to see this. i gave alot to my ex. He never gave me much. I learned my lesson, wish I'd seen this before I did all of that!
Loving your content!
You're really helpful. Thanks.
That LOVE of ART huh? Bill I’ll play video games with you 👊🏻
Of course it is a bad sign if you can't get a phone call or a facetime before the meet, but beware of the opposite a manipulative narcissist might give you. They could lure you in with perfect disposition and ever given presence... for a while, until you're too deep/hooked and then no more phone calls, no more facetime... just the angst of the wait, the hurt that they don't tend to your basic needs in a relationship, the hurt you know they know it could feel safe and free for you when they are not here simply by keeping the level of respect and commitment they shower you with when they are there... but know this: it's control... you are now feeling hurt when they are not there, you are now waiting for them and thinking in loops about this, and you are now feeling loved and the warmth when they are around... this is control, this feels safe for them who are afraid of abandonment. You might be better off fleeing as soon as possible... even though you'll loose someone you love and someone you see great potential within... but this potential, it is not actively working for them... it might never activate for you... it might never activate for them... i hope for you some change, that some can feel safe with you, being truthful... but slim chances.... or long wait... in mayhem.. insecurity... ups and downs... disolving yourself in agony... forgetting how to live properly... forgetting the joy you are for yourself when you feel free and respected even if not loved by a partner, but at least by you... because you have the opportunity to fill your life with certainty, little things or big things if you like, but things that builds up and amount to something good, peaceful.
Lots of courage to you all. I hope you will find people as much into you as you are into them, and i hope they will have a sane approach to the relationship they have with you as much as within themselves.
"Matthew is implying dump not murder him' 😂😂😂
Wow, I can write a good romance novel with this advice 😂
Wow!! Very helpful:)
Wow, Matthew, you are a treasure!
Got to be your best video 😂❤
I definitely tried too hard and ended up putting myself in the friend zone
So much information in this video!
Wow thanks for this video😇😇
Now I need one of these for finding a woman
Love it! ❤Get rid of him...' dump' him not 'kill' him 😂👍🏼
I'm afraid to cut guys out ruthlessly because I feel like I dont meet that many guys! I try the apps from time to time and then try to meet people out in the real world but it doesnt really happen. Id love to apply this advice but where are all the single guys at?! 😂
You really forgot you had a camera on your right side You Right Guy ⚘
Haha that crowd sure settled down at that Instagram comment :D
thank you for this video!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mate I spoke to a guy over 6 weeks we met once and almost 4 weeks later he saying about meeting again after another two weeks...I felt he was giving me crumbs to keep me hanging around probably for some attention making excuses about being busy so when no arrangement was made for us to meet again by week 6 for a second date I just blocked him. I felt it just wasn't good enough. Second date after 6 weeks wtf and it wasn't even confirmed maybe and acting like he was so busy was bogus
Goodness! He is really funny but real :D
3:16 footnote- I laughed so hard.
Brilliant!
Any advice for the guys finding the right woman?.
Let’s go, Matthew!