What is a Break from Reality Like?
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- čas přidán 4. 06. 2024
- What is a break from reality like? In this video, Lauren shares her experience of what it was like to have a psychotic break from reality. This break from reality is often described as psychosis, which is a symptom of schizophrenia.
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Wow. Just wow. Your ability to elucidate such a complex disorder in a way that anyone can understand always enthralls me. Thank you so much
Ooh, new word learned, “elucidate.” Thank you stranger!
@@VTuberSagie LOL, my pleasure. You are a delight.😃
yeah she can read a textbook.
You just described what I've been telling my doctor. I thought I was the only one who had these experiences. Thank you for sharing. I don't feel so different now.
@@eugenewilson4045 What are you talking about? And who are you even talking to..?
Did you go back to the doctor?
Do they have good mental health treatment in Muslim majority countries?
*Because most people like you, who take random selfies trying to pose, always need extra attention… So odds are, you’re making this up to try and sound unique.*
@@ElectronFieldPulsewouldn’t know because I was not someone who lived in the bigger cities or had money - but I assume not, from what I was surrounded by most people do not even believe in mental illnesses and all that and it was just extremely taboo and all that
Thank you for this video, I often experience psychosis as an "atmospheric" change in reality, a sort of "psychotic bubble" in which everything seems to be the same but the laws of reality are radically changed. For example, it seems that there is no divide between "inside" and "outside", and I'm worried that my thoughts can directly modify the world around me. Distances in space and time seem to be irrelevant in this alternative world, it's like everything is entangled and unfathomable. Regarding paranoia, I don't feel that the other people are persecuting me, but I have fear of death, I feel that my death is imminent. It's very distressing and scary 😨.
Your description actually makes me think of perhaps a milder experience of what the TED Talk, "My Stroke of Insight" describes. The speaker had had a stroke on the left hemisphere of her brain. However she doesn't describe fear so much as euphoria. But that enmeshment of outer and inner world are described. It's worth a watch if you haven't seen it.
Thank you for sharing.
I don’t think I have a psychosis disorder but I have had light versions of all this. I definitely have a non-zero level of psychotic potential. Very interesting to hear from everyone.
I am a frequent lucid dreamer and this does sound very much like dream logic. Thoughts DO change reality in that world. Distance and time are pretty irrelevant there. Very curious. It used to scare me that my grasp on it reality felt a little loose. I am more ok with it nowadays, after working on mindfulness and acceptance.
I have so many questions about what is reality and why we sometimes find ourselves in other places. Is it really all in our heads? There are no solid answers, just best guesses.
Thank you for sharing. You articulate your experience & of softening boundaries so well. I’m sorry for your distress and hope you experience this less or as you go your understanding-ness can accompany you and the moments will lessen in length or intensity.
That's just non-duality/ """Kundalini""" psychosis like in Carl Jung's Unnus Mundus..
There really is no barrier besides our ego which condenses the whole cosmos immediately around you(further from you takes more time) into a subjective perspective.
It's not so delusional when there's actual real discussions in philosophy about it being the actual nature of counciousness.
If you go in my channel I have a lot of playlists with tons of videos, mostly in these ideas but many more on theoretical physics/philosophy of physics and how they relate to that.
I am sorry for your distress about death, but as I see it, death is only letting go of ourselves as our ego/identity, basically the curtain will fall and you'll become the curtain, what's seeing what's behind it and what's behind it in itself; with no sense of self or any subjective empirical experiences like being immersed in a 3d world with time flowing constantly and without the limitation of the barrier to our subjective interpretation(the world we see(hallucinate) based in information from outside our brains, because you won't be in a brain anymore, you'll be the wind, the stars, the ocean and every form of life, every atom that exists, every molecule, every cell, all energy, all information, all of spacetime itself in its fundamental/objective manifestation which is the universe itself.
I recommend you listen to and read the lyrics to Saturn by Sleeping at Last and search about ego death and psychedelic experiences(Carl Sagan wrote awesomely about it under the pseudonym of Mr.X).
And I'll leave you with a quote from Sagan:
"We are a way for the Cosmos to know itself".
I wish you the best possible life you could ever live and I hope your brain, your environment and yourself can agree on how to get to that best life
Lauren. You give me so much HOPE. I am a single mom of two girls and I am following you to learn how to be the best me with schizoaffective disorder. I now understand that my periodic feelings of head above water vs head under water are / and have been times in and out of psychosis. Thank you for helping me understand me. Much love!
Lauren, I’m astounded by the realisation that your experience of what is considered normative as Reality is so easy to empathise with. You’ve expressed it so well to someone whose life goal is to help people suffering because of disability (me). More on some other specific points from this video hopefully later.
I'm also a single mom of two girls, I feel for you so much. Sending you all the love 🌹🌹🌹
My stepdaughter (31) has been hospitalised regularly over the past five years. I've been able to get a measure of when she is dropping into psychosis again. She hides away and talks with her voices a lot, or acts as though I am just a visitor in the house. Polite but quite distant.
I cannot know what is going on in her head, but it is as though she is in that state when we are just waking from a very involved dream that we like, and reality is encroaching. Except that, instead of a few moments, it goes on for a long long time.
She is never distressed when in psychosis, just acting perfectly normally according to the world she perceives. It is as though the psychosis is a comfortable place, and she doesn't want to leave it. (Who likes having a good dream disturbed?)
I have found that by sitting on the floor, in front of her and asking inane questions, helps draw her out. "Would you like some tea? Sugar with that? Milk as well? What are you painting now? ...."
She takes tea with no milk or sugar, I know that, and her paintings are always on display. The questions are deliberately inane, like the alarm that wakes us. Mildly annoying for her but, in her case, pulls her into focus. Well, more often than not.
Oh yes! I noticed we can draw them out too. And its crucial to maintain a calm voice and never to look them straight in the eyes. But it can get exhausting. 🤷🏽♂️
How wonderful for a strategy to appear!
it must be terrible to bring a sick child in this horrible world!
@@patriciavandevelde5469 The biggest worry is what happens to them if I become sick or die. (I also have a son with autism). Happily, living in a country with amazing social support means that I know they will be cared for.
Yes, on a day-to-day basis, it is a worry but I'm no longer sure I would want to be without them. The whole point of freedom is we get to choose what we commit to. I wanted a family. I certainly didn't plan on doing it on my own (my wife died) but, I get to finish what we started. If my wife is looking down from wherever then I'm sure she will be smiling. That smile was all it ever took to keep me going. Loved her you see.
I think there is a lot to be said for not trying to be a victim. It's true that the world, nature, doesn't care. I can't say complaining ever achieved very much. This is my job now and I intend to do the best I can.
this is a good comment
My partner has manic depression and compares his altered state of reality to the "Upside Down" world in Stranger Things - it's like the regular world, except everything is dark and broken.
Damn. This is how I perceive things normally. Wish I could remember feeling otherwise.
This a good description actually…
I think the dream analogy is a great one because it allows neurotypical people to understand how disorienting delusions are, but also how it’s not a CHOICE to believe those delusions. Great video!
I wish that everyone could see this. So often complex mood disorders are written off in negative ways. Thank you for being so clear and beautiful with your words. Hopefully videos like this will give the public further clarity that people with mental health disorders aren’t monsters, but people trying to find their way, as we all are, in all our f*d up ways and whatnot. Easy to cast a finger. Look at yourself and be honest. Pure beauty here. Thank you for your courage and lucidity on such a complex topic
When I worked in a hospital back in the 80s, someone who had just been through psychosis said that things had different meanings to her. Random phrases or signs or looks from other people that she would have ignored or found trivial in everyday life suddenly had extreme meaning to her as if they were clues to something very important in her life.
I have bipolar disorder and if I start thinking various things are signs I know I am getting sicker.
strongly recognise. I've summed it up to doctors as "increased significance" - to a level hard to imagine. Grains of sand telling you the universe will disintegrate because of your decisions.
Or is it all big clues to something
Mr. Non-sequitur says with all respect; You look amazing with short hair🙏Thanks for all you do❤
Love the "parallel-universe" metaphor, just today I had that same feeling and the only way I could describe it was "feeling like I woke up in the wrong dimension." I feel it's a perfect way to describe the disconnect from reality.
Another way in which breaks from reality are alike to dreams for me is that my memory of what happened during the episode is really fuzzy and similar to only being able to grasp at memory fragments of a dream. Apparently it is very common for your memory of episodes to be patchy.
For some reason i remember every bit of my dilutions and halusinations, they're no different than everyday memories for me. I don't know if thats a good thing or a bad thing.
My psychotic break was 3 years ago and I remember it like it was yesterday. I can imagine having patchy memories of it could be hard for recovery.
ever since my first psychosis episode, life has felt like i’m on a constant journey where i’m not able to rest until i finish the journey which i’ve been told has no end. i’ve stopped trying to convince myself that my thoughts are just delusions because they just feel so real. i’ve basically accepted them to be real but i try not to let it affect my “normal” life. because of my experience for most of my life pretending to not be depressed, it became easy to pretend that i’m not still delusional. it feels like i share my mind with different versions of myself. feels like i’m constantly remaking my “personality “ because i’m constantly changing as a person. every day.
@@sofian1963 yeah, i can tell myself it’s not real but then i think to myself, well how do i even know that? it all feels real. sometimes more real than real life and i’m just left stunned when i come back. doctors say that it’s for life, for the rest of my life, this is how my mind is going to perceive reality or realities. do i keep it all to myself since every effort i’ve made to try and get someone to understand has failed? will i go insane because of the constant, silent and lonely battle that i go through in my mind, everyday? if so, how long until i break? until i slip into psychosis and i have to get put in a ward for my safety and the safety of my family? it makes it hard to find the motivation to try and make something out of my life when i already lost everything the first time i experienced psychosis.
@@sofian1963 i wish you nothing but happiness, good luck in life.
Holy shit... the way you worded this is extraordinarily similar to my experiences. I have never been diagnosed (to my adult knowledge) of anything, as of yet, but finding these videos and reflecting honestly about my life... It's likely I fit into this category of mental health diagnoses. I have been extremely afraid of this as a possibility, due to the "crazy" nature of the extremely shame-based stigma surrounding it, but at this point, I just want the truth. Thanks for sharing your experience. It was validating to read your words and know that someone else has felt so similarly. I wish you the best.
Don't resist it's not gonna kill you. You're experiencing another person's reality. TELEPATHY. You are not crazy. One thing is for sure you are not crazy. That will stop if the person you are experiencing this from will cease to exist. You will experience that too when that person undergoes extreme suffering.
I think the relationship between dreaming and psychosis is important. I've often wondered if that isn't exactly what schizophrenia and psychosis is - the brain is caught in a partially asleep state. It explains the rapid eye movement many experience and the catatonia (or feeling like you can't move).
This is really simplistic, yet so phenomenal. I wonder if it’s been studied? I like this this theory.
It's altered state of reality. You are having a glimpse of someone elses reality. TELEPATHY.
I had drug induced psychosis, in 2008, amphetamines, and I read that it resembles schizophrenia, my description of it was "dreaming while awake"
It’s so true. I can especially identify with the reality break with someone is out there to get you. It’s a really uneasy and scary feeling which can leave you feeling hypervigilant and extremely anxious. Like your fight or flight has kicked in on overdrive. Thank you so much for your videos. Since I started following you I feel less alone in my symptoms. Stay safe! ❤️
I think it also relates to the Awaken state. I had a sudden Awakening experience several years ago. It felt just like waking up from a dream. It was total bliss. It faded a way and I was back too the "normal" state of existence, which is so much like a dream. In where I am different, in outsider, and never fit into the consentual truth of reality.
I always feel the same way too, like everyone around me has the wrong idea somehow and I have the right one just with no evidence. like this summer when i kept hallucinating break ins. I knew that they were hallucinations but I also "knew" that my house was being invaded
As a child my family were always arguing. I was always sensitive and lived in my Imagination to escape a reality I could not endure, so I've never really known the world as most people do. I was happy in my own world until I reached adulthood and it went bad, then I was diagnosed. What is Truth anyway?
Hey! That's my life story! ;)
God is Love which is Truth and a light to your feet.
As a child you were born innocent.
Until your parents traumatized you with their anger.
This caused you to loose your innocence and to escape the pain you fled into the darkness of the imagination. Satan’s playground.
Now you have become what you are angry at.
You are not you.
You are the you that your mother created you to be, when she imposed her will on you and broke your spirit.
Drop the anger and return to innocence so that you can become the you you were created to be.
The real Justin.
I think Truth is when you live in a universe where most other people live and share. Of course people in different cultures interpret life differently, so we live in a way in different universes.
But when you are aware of what’s your reality and other people’s reality. And you have boundaries so your mind is not invaded by your surroundings or other people.
@@freshliving4199 😅
@@freshliving4199 ❤
I truly understand this 100%. I have schizoaffective bipolar type and this is the best explanation for what psychosis has felt like for me...the only contrast is that while I experience paranoia and negative thoughts...on the opposite spectrum everything has a pattern, synchronicity, and meaning to any given song on the radio or sometimes I see repetitive numbers appear and before I know its exactly how you describe it. Its like parallel realities and I've always questioned reality ever since...but now after years of recovery...my doctor has helped me and so has my family. Also writing my thoughts out can been a very therapeutic and when things get hard I usually am deep into writing my science fiction fantasy novel...that hopefully I can publish...share with others what my world feels like on daily basis...lots of synchronicities and also I've been able to understand myself better through the works of Carl Jung :) Thank you for sharing your experiences with us
So my first break happened back in 2016 when I was hospitalized for bi-polar disorder, it was only my second hospitalization. Only this year after coming out of the hospital for the 4th time. I got a diagnosis of schizo-effective disorder when I got out of the hospital and when I met with my physiatrist for the first time. So my break back in 2016 was something nobody thought was more than just bi-polar with psychotic features. It was strange the first few days before I felt normal but something felt off. Then I run downstairs and tell my mom that I wasn’t sure if this was the real universe. It was so severe that I couldn’t tell what was happening. Then I go to the hospital and then it’s years until I realize that it was a symptom of the schizo-effective disorder. When I was in the hospital earlier this year I told the doctors about what I was hallucinating and the scary voices they just said it was bi-polar. Thanks for helping me through this hard time. I started watching your channel after I got my diagnosis and it’s helped me immensely. Sorry for writing a paragraph.
Omg
I was crying while watching this. This Happend to me all day 🥺🥺🥺🥺
Please used to take medication near by a good Psychiatrist. You will be also great days my dear.
l o v e from Bharat Country 🕉🙏🏼
I live Major Depression but I can so relate to the subtle slide one takes to an episode of Depression. A lot of times I don’t see it coming. Before I know it my world is the same but I interpret it so differently. Fortunately my wife is a Clinical Psychologist, and I have learned to trust her when she lets me know I’m beginning to have an episode. It happens, though I take my medication on the regular, but I can come out of it faster. I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m afraid to miss my medication.
I relate to this with depressive episodes too! Thank you for mentioning it.
Depression is so much easier to manage if you can identify that initial slide.
Not fair to pick on someone who is slow. I made some sort of mistake, not exactly sure and everyone has been calling me stupid. This has been going on for years. If it’s a form of punishment or revenge it needs to stop and people need to stop acting like evil children. People don’t come right out and say what the reason is. Could it be that they’re really stupid too for picking on a slower person?
Yup I can relate to this a lot. When I have psychotic symptoms I feel so sure that people are trying to manipulate me and control me or laugh at me. My mom feels hurt sometimes because she asks me how I could ever think of her as acting that way when I know she loves me so much. But in the moment it doesn’t really matter like you said. I don’t question it. It’s really hard on everyone when that happens.
I can totally relate to the experiences of psychosis as you describe it. For me when I come out of my psychosis and back to reality and realise how ill I was and what I was thinking whilst psychotic is the most upsetting for me. It is very scary whilst in the midst of my psychosis too since it is mostly paranoia and persecutory. Since becoming a Christian I appreciate though that there is the physical world we live in as well as the spiritual realm at play which is helpful to note.
Very helpful , descriptive comment. Encourage you to share more. Thank you.
Yeah when you look back at what your mind did after the episode, it's pretty horrific. You feel so vulnerable becuase you feel like you have no control over it. It's the most upsetting for me as well.
@@Linda-lt1gg What aspect would you like me to share more on and I will try to explain?
Praise God. I’m glad to hear about you becoming a Christian. I was born again in 2011/2012 and He woke me up in a very mighty way.
What is hard during my psychosis is for the reasons you’ve mentioned. My delusions are paranoid and persecutory in nature so something as simple as a car driving down the road could be part of the conspiracy to come after you (a paranoid delusion in all reality). Just 2 days ago I was reflecting on my previous psychoses and almost worked myself into a paranoid state. I had to go and get some exercise because I was convincing myself that I was going back into psychosis even though I wasn’t and I started worrying about surveillance. It was so scary because it’s been a year since my last one and right now I am coming up on the anniversary of my last one and my therapist did say that at times during the same month of a previous psychosis that it can kinda come back gradually.
I really relate to what you are saying in the video about coming in or coming out being very gradual. That’s true. I’m gradually learning to retrain my thoughts.
@@BornAgainOneHope I hope and pray you continue to stay well. It’s difficult isn’t it when our minds are not working right. The world’s going on around us yet our brain can not interpret what’s happening. I am so appreciative when my brain is working well and when I am not so well try and draw on my faith to remember God’s truths as he is not a God of confusion 🙏💚
Could you do a video on psychological thrillers and their effect on people with psychotic disorders, for me psychological thrillers can be triggers for psychotic symptoms and I can't find any articles or videos talking about this subject. I think it would be very interesting to hear what you know about this.
@Jopulis; I know you wanna hear from Lauren, but here’s my two cents on the topic.
I enjoyed Joker, even though it attracted some criticism for its portrayal of people suffering with mental health issues; several missteps that stood out for me though, was an early scene where Arthur asked his social worker if she could help in him getting his meds increased - her response was “you’re on seven types of medications, surely they must be doing something?” The implication to the uninitiated viewer is that he’s so “crazy” he’s on a variety of pills, but in actuality, why a patient may be on several different tablets isn’t all to with his psychosis; these drugs can lower white blood cells, so you get meds for that; anti-psychotics suppress flow of dopamine, and can inadvertently affect neutrons that control serotonin, so then you get an antidepressant etc.
The final two scenes that could have done with more research is when Arthur goes to the hospital to retrieve his Mum’s health record. In the lift carrying him down to his destination, there’s a patient in there with him flipping out with two police guards. He’s an incidental character who we know nothing about, but the cops, doctors etc would’ve restrained him before he even entered the ambulance with Lorazepam or something, the high state he was in would’ve been more plausible in his home or police station, but this timing felt off to me.
Also, the patients who Arthur walks past are completely “zoned out” and over acting, but in real psych wards, the patients are often time serene and “normal”, but I guess that doesn’t make entertaining cinema.
@@richbarrett6380 You have some good points there, but I meant more like the effect of creating new and worsening older delusions, worst one for me has been Black Mirror, I think that every single episode gave me a new delusion or highly strengthened an old one, it was probably not good for me to watch it in it's entirety, but I got so addicted to the show right in the very beginning that I couldn't stop watching it... I do not recommend watching it if you have a psychosis disorder and don't want to develop new or worsen your old delusions.
For example: one episode of Black Mirror shows how we essentially could be living in a simulation which is meant for extracting some information out of us, like if in the "real world" you'd have done something wrong, they would put a copy of you in a simulation where you live a pretty normal life, but they slowly start getting that needed information out of you (through things like manipulation) and then they would punish the "real" you in the "real" world. This created a lot of delusions for me about having to keep quiet, so that I don't give away any information and just made me generally think that I live in a simulation... This is what I think needs a little bit more awareness and talking about
@@Jopulis : Yeah, got ya, I’ll try and give another example. The movie Saint Maud is similar to Joker and if you identify or have affinity with the main character, it’s interesting to watch it objectively from the other characters’ point of view to get an understanding how most people view those with a mental illness, and it’s one of indifference, apathy and lack of empathy.
I haven’t seen Black Mirror, but the show runner is popular in the UK, he has an irreverent take on society.
A contemporary of his, Chris Morris, also uses irreverent humour to tackle taboo, serious issues and the last movie he made The Day Shall Come, with Anna Kendrick stars a character who has some unspecified condition, but the government use his predicament to their advantage for political oneupmanship.
Don’t know if I should recommend this film to you, but just watch the trailer to get a feel, hopefully if you watch it, it’s not too traumatic or problematic.
@@Jopulis i hear what you're saying and I'll share my experience. I can sense spirits and stuff so i wanted to get more info so i got on here and watched some videos. That same night i had a nightmare about a demon and then i experienced sleep paralysis for the first time. The next few days were filled with delusional thinking and tactile hallucinations so i understand. I have bipolar I so i won't be watching any videos like that again. I'll just speak to others with similar experience
I wanted to Thank you so so much for this.
Ive had many psychotic breaks, and Hallucinations, in all but 1 the latest i could tell what was real and what was not.
When i got out of the Medicaly induced Coma, and i had long after healed and came back, the Doctor explained what i had was not psychosis but confusion, and is common when waking from medically induced comas.
Ive been trying to understand what the heck this is like,
And youre video was the best explanation ive heard from someone who has/d it.
We see the same physical reality, but we overpaint it with alternative thoughts and images that are not connected to reality.
Thank you so much for sharing this,
I see things a lot lately and here things I used to run from it but now I face it I don't run no more I'm not scared no more
I can relate to this, so many things that could be easily explained by logic for me when I'm in psychosis but those thoughts almost get edited out and everything starts to add up to confirm my delusions.
Yes. Adding to that, my experiencing psychosis seems to shape how I see others seeing me. That would be "visible face-reading," initiated by me, and then altered responses by others because of my oddness, wherein I project their persecutory "darts" as auditory hallucinations.
Yes, I too have experienced these breaks and episodes. For me, when you said parallel dimension it resonated with me. There are other versions of ourselves because of the decisions we make and I've found through quantum mechanics that were still entangled to those "other selves". It seems schizophrenia and schizoaffective can be the result of this "merging" process. Spiritually this can be reffered to as transcending into enlightenment.
Crazy
Thanks so much for clarifying your experience of a break from reality.
That sounds very similar to the state I experienced several times on LSD, about 50 years ago.
Very well stated. Thank you.
Thanks!
My little brother died by suicide. He threw himself from the 10th floor. He stopped taking the treatment- we dont know when. He was anxious to the point of terror - he thought he was a terrorist and the government had been monitoring him for over 8 years 24 /24 hours. He left many notes in which he said why he committed suicide. He was psychotic and lost all contact with reality. 😭😭😭 He never accepted the disease. He was schizo-affective disorder depresia type. He was 26 years old. It's a shock to us. 😭
Look up gang stalking and trauma based mind control. V2k which has been around since ww2 it’s possible he was a government guinea pig. If combined with covert harassment (counterintelligence) your brother may have been telling the truth.
Thank you!
This is so on point !
Thank you, Lauren! I appreciate that you teach us.
Thank you so much!
You are a gifted teacher❤
This is so, so helpful. Thank you so much!
Lauren, you described my experiences exactly. Thank you.
Exactly what I feel, you expalined it very clearly.
Thank You
Good job Lauren! You’re helping so many people
Well explained. And so lovely too. I trip out on her for shaving her head because as a buddhist or monk mentality the shaving of the head represents new birth and honestly thats what a psychotic break can really be interpret at. As a re awakening.
For me it feels like being high when I haven't taken or done anything to get high. A feeling of dreaming a more realistic based dream while actually awake.
Unimaginable
You're awesome! Thank you for sharing!
Thanks you are so helpful
Thank you for sharing. Bless you for opening your heart to us. Hope that you have a wonderful day!🌹
Thank you god bless you
I also feel somewhat like this.
Like everyone hates me, like people are against me, people call me out only out of pity or because they want to make fun of me.
I was feeling like this since I was a teenager. Recently I was able to somehow break out of it and I see it almost as if I lived in alternate reality.
But even when I see my past as alternate reality I still get same feelings even today with different people. Even seeing it through a bit doesn’t completely help me.
You keep making videos about super specific feelings that I experience that I didn’t know anyone else knew about and it is very informative and validating thank you v much.
Your videos are amazing. I love how easy it is to relate to your experiences. Thank you!
Great explanation. Thanks.
You've described my wife exactly. Now what can I do about it? I can't get anyone to take this seriously, even after she stabbed me. I want very much for her to get her life on track. For her own sake but also for the sake of our children. But I can't reason with someone who is so removed from reality and the laws are crafted in such a way that I can't force the issue. She recently showed up at my house after being booted from a homeless shelter. I don't feel safe in my own home with this person who is not at all grounded in reality.
You phrase it very well, this is what I have been going through as well.
Wow You explain it so well Thank you so much
Trauma therapy feels like another world of reality. Thank you so much!
I was really glad to watch this video. I have Bipolar 1 and have twice had psychotic breaks with reality accompanied by mania. The feeling of being and a dream and there being a filter on reality are exactly what I felt. I'm finally able to read and learn more about what I went through without being upset or anxious, and it is very nice to hear that this is a common experience for people with psychosis. It was also good to hear that it is normal to take time to come out of it, it definitely took time for the filter to diminish as I recovered. Thank you for your videos!
This is why I am watching this right now. Thank you
You're awesome!
Your definition of a break with reality is the same way I can describe my breaks with reality.
Thank you for explaining this so well. This helps me deal with a loved one.
You are doing such a good job, I am happy to support you.
I loved the metaphor of the blanket of delusion. For me, it is as if someone changes the degree of the atmosphere like from neutral to scary or persecutory. It happened to me at times when I didnt get sleep, and it is great to see it explained so lucidly here!!!
Omg Lauren that sweater looks so comfortable and stylish! Love it so much! Thank you so much for sharing this video, I really appreciate your insight. I do not have schizophrenia but borderline personality disorder and I definitely relate to the feeling of "oh my goodness did that all really happen" after I have an emotional disturbance. And then I feel really ashamed of my behaviour once I come back to "normal". Thanks again for your content! I really appreciate you. Sending you, Rob and your beautiful family all of my love and encouragement 💞
I have a very close friend who I believe is going through her first extreme break from reality and this video was very informative! Love your work ! Thank you
Thank you so much for what you do. I’m a family member who cares a lot, but can’t seem to reach, connect or help, and your channel gives me hope! Please keep making videos! You’re awesome! I’m very grateful to have discovered your channel! Thank you!
Thank you for making it so easy to understand! I'd had hard time understanding what delusion woukd feel like and the analogy of dream made it so easy to understand!
Thank you for this video,you have given me insight on whats goes on in my son mind,it breaks my heart to hear,its a lot to deal with
Thank you for this very helpful explanation!
Thank you Lauren .. I love your videos .. ive worked in mental health for years and am on my own mental health journey. Your description of your experience in psychosis is the most helpful I have ever come across. Sending you good wishes .. you do an amazing job x
I think how Lauren communicates and explains her symptoms is amazing in helping others understand the way we see the world. You've helped me to understand I have very similar symptoms and am now seeking help so thankyou so much, I finally feel like I am able to talk to professionals about how I feel and not be ashamed or judged for it xx
Lauren, thank you for your insights! I'm trying to understand what a friend is going through, and this is really helpful. I initially thought that when she came out of a psychotic episode several years ago that she'd go back to normal, but now I understand that it can take a long time for person's perceptions of the past to shift. I suppose this is part of the reason that a supportive housing situation is good as a bridge between being hospitalized and going back to living independently. I'm visiting my friend regularly during her current hospitalization (so are other friends, not just me), and I hope she doesn't think that we all have some negative ulterior motive for coming to see her.
The inpatient social worker warned me that when my friend's discharged, she may have a different baseline than she did before. After her last psychotic episode, I certainly noticed changes based on the medication she was taking, which isn't the medication she's on now, and I assumed that everything that was different about her was related to the medication. Is it common for people to seem different after a psychotic episode even if there hasn't been a change in meds?
you videos are very informative! thank you for sharing them ! I found your channel when i had a mental break down and though i was developing schizophrenia- it turned out to be just severe anxiety … i still watch your videos though💕
Mine always felt like I was walking around on a heavy dose of sedatives then suddenly adrenaline when I react to something I can react to. Its like wading through warm jelly and blurred memory then an explosion of fear and/or anger. I stopped driving at all due to that getting worse, I was autopilot and then got panicked when I came to at a stoplight (One I was at almost everyday) and thought I was lost, nothing was familiar.
Other new breaks started in the army, where Id have a false few hours or a false day. I remember meeting with my sergeant where he told me to be, and went home after final formation. Got a call asking where the heck I went and I responded I had already met with you and had the paperwork in my bag.
The story twist ended with: I never met him in the commons. I never spoke to him. He wasnt giving me paperwork anyways.
There were some other things I didnt know about going on in the mornings as well.
CSM was kind enough to allow an honorary since I DID always show up to duty and did whatever work without complaint.
It really has been destroying my work life and I miss work and social gatherings. Im embarrassed to be anywhere now.
That must feel so frustrating.
@@o.e.lawrence4198
Stuff gets rough with trying to figure out which full experiences were real vs even the shirt term memory issues. I feel ya on this.
I'm so sorry to hear about your struggle. Hopefully you don't isolate too much.
@@tamarad4146 Im bad about that. Live with my bf and his family though, so Im almost never alone to get weird.
@@corpselight7989 I'm glad to hear that you live with people. I know you didn't ask for suggestions, but maybe join a group that focuses on these topics. That way, maybe you can find some people who you can relate to in this regard and who you don't feel embarrassed around. Might be worth Googling some local groups and/or talking to a doctor about what resources are available to you. I get the embarrassment. (I'm presuming that you haven't reached out, but if you have, my apologies for being presumptious). All the best to you.
You've explained it so perfectly! It's a friday night, I'm having quite a vivid time myself of these kinds of dreamy memories. Ps. I am so fricking glad your husband really understands your condition fully. It really does make it so much easier when others understand this condition to its fullest degree.
As ironic as it is, when you mentioned the astronaut thing, it is just like that, when you come back, you sort of feel like you've just been on another planet, far from our own solar system. But it is the same earth. Only it is just different. And that's all it is. It grows and grows, and then, people start picking up on your happenstances... And then, just like that, it slowly goes back to normal... And you've to pick up the pieces and relearn everything you just forgot. It IS just like seeing a pearly planet, as astronauts back in the day did, and how they lost their minds too.
Great video.
Edit: we are the astronauts who had to pick the pieces our minds back up... We survived the worst. Strange minds!
I appreciate you opening up about this and the dream comparison was helpful for maybe just getting a hint of what it might be like. Thank you.
It brings tears down as this is the closest words that describe what I experienced ( and really confused and scared about whether it happening again!).
I just want to share this with all close friends of mine.
I think this way a looooot. I'm able to objectively think about these thoughts and understand they're not real life while thinking them. I can't imagine thinking it was 100% real. you're wonderful.
Love u and all ur content. Have shared with my roommate who has schizoaffective disorder. I have had psychosis and breaks from reality, many trips to psychward and I relate so much to you. Keep it up! Love the shaved head u are beautiful 😍
Thank you for sharing yourself with others. I wish you only the best.
really well explained - relatable, thanks
Also wanted to say you look great. I hope you and your family are doing well. What a great channel, great perspective and so well articulated.
That was an extremely good explanation of what my paranoia is like. For five and a half years I worked a very violent job, and it gave me ptsd. Fun addition to my schizoaffective bipolar type disorder, right? So now my dilutions are tinged by that violence. Everyone I see is a possible threat to myself, and whomever is with me. I can't help but be vigilant, and ready to fight at the drop of a hat. I hate it. It's so bad that I find it hard to go out into the world, even just to get an energy drink at the Circle K next to my home. It's very similar to what you described. Thank you for educating people on this aspect of schizophrenia/schizoaffective disorder.
Loving the new haircut! I've been watching your videos for a long time and have always found it educational and so helpful. Thank you for sharing your life and wisdoms with us!
Your explanation of a break from reality made so much sense. I have been feeling this way for the past several years on a daily basis, but in a much milder form. I've been dx'd with C-PTSD and Bipolar II. I'm on meds that don't really help, but have been on for so long that I can't get off of them now due to the withdrawl side effects. My p-doc just doesn't get it. It's like they evaluate a patient, give them a dx, give them meds, and that's it. You get put into a box with a label on it and you can't get out even if you are in the wrong box. Ugh!!
Thank you very much for sharing your personal light for others who I D with you. For me, that veil lifting gives me the security I need because I’m not broke, I just need some light on some situations I go through from time to time. Keep doing what your doing girl. You Shine :)
Thank you, I've had something happen a few times, just like this but it starts with straight panicing and trying to not think about it to stop it to becoming so bad
When I'm having a depressed episode I think for me the negative feelings are much the same as when you're somewhere dark and you know *something* is watching you and it's going to do something *absolutely terrible* and no amount of reassurance/rational thinking can put you at ease.
But when I'm manic that same ethereal feeling still hangs in the air but it feels as if I'm channeling it into finding deep truths about world that no one else is able to put together.
Thankfully I've only had that level of psychosis for only a day or so at a time, I can't imagine lingering there for longer.
I really appreciate your channel and I think you do a great job in de-mystifying schizophrenia. The way you have described psychosis here, reminds me of certain times in my life which I remember falling into a depression due to PMDD and even though I’m looking at the calendar and my notes for when I have good days, and I can see all the patterns in my past moods, but when I am in this depressed state I STILL can’t remember how it felt to be happy or just normal and I swear that This is now my reality and the depression will never end! While I don’t have schizophrenia I do have autism and sometimes I hear thoughts in my head that seem to come from a place other than myself. Luckily I don’t actually hear these voices with my ears but I can hear them inside my head and that is disturbing. While Most of the time my medication keeps these “thoughts” quiet, they do come out in times of stress and I think I can understand the paranoia aspect of your delusions too well because that’s what the thoughts focus on. When I have anxiety for seemingly no reason, it feels like someone or something is out to get me and watching my every move and disapproving of me. I know it is not to the extent that you have it but enough that I can have empathy for your experience!
holy shit this is the best description of it that I’ve been able to find so far- I’m currently kinda in that process of creeping out of an episode where moods n stuff are easier to navigate and I have a higher sense of awareness and I ultimately feel like I’ve got my personality n creativity n life back. It’s just that things get fuzzy from time to time still and yeah I’m just making sure I’m educated and I’ve got some stable anchors in reality- just in case shit gets goofy and distorted again. Thank you for being the resource that you are and helping me articulate/understand something I’ve felt like a frantic passenger to for years during the hardest of times. Good vibes and I wish ya luck in navigating your way through this cosmic waltz we call life c:
one of us one of us one of us!
Just to say again : what an AMAZING human being you are! 💕
Thank you so much for being so articulate about this, Lauren. It helps a lot. Also your outfits are always cute :)
Your channel is the best! I couldn't put my feelings together to shape the words to describe what I saw or felt during these bouts of what I call "really attacks"!!! 😶🤔🙄🙂 I'm most grateful for your videos and I've learned a lot from you and your hubby. 😊
That was a great description, comparing it to dreams. Cause in dreams we don’t question at all what’s going on, we just accept it!
Your honesty is remarkably helpful . You are a beautiful woman and a blessing.
I never knew there was really a name for this. When this happens to me I constantly feel distanced from my body, like everyone is out to harm me because I'm some ultra important being who's abnormally important (like a godly being). My thoughts are scattered and all over the place. I also get anxious and jittery and like I'm dreaming and that I'm invincible.
Thank you so much for making this video.
Thank you for having the courage to describe your experience with the public...You described it so well I feel like I finally understand what people that have this illness...I can sympathize now...May God bless you for your bravery and wonderful insight!!!