I Got Kicked Out of Church | Bill Engvall
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- čas přidán 15. 09. 2019
- Bill has got some of the quickest wit, but sometimes it backfires. Sometimes when Bill gets a little confused he says the first thing that comes to mind....we don't think the church is going to be letting him speak for a while! Enjoy this oldie but goodie from Bill's library of hilarity.
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About Bill Engvall
Comedian Bill Engvall was part of the enormously successful Blue Collar Comedy Tour and has starred in a number of films, TV shows and sitcoms, including Blue Collar TV, Comedy Central, A Pair of Jokers, Evening at the Improv , The Jeff Foxworthy Show, The Tonight Show and the Late Show with David Letterman. Some of Engvall's specials and albums include:
- Just Sell Him For Parts (2016)
- Them Idiots Whirled Tour (2012)
- Aged and Confused (2009)
- 15° Off Cool (2007)
- Dorkfish (1998)
- Here’s Your Sign (1996)
Engvall's work has earned his numerous awards, including American Comedy Award for “Best Male Stand-up Comedian," #1 position on the Billboard Comedy Chart for Here's Your Sign, “Best Selling Comedy album," and a Grammy Award nomination for Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One For The Road.
#BillEngvall
Bill Engvall Comedy
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The older I get, the more Bill makes sense....lolthis stuff is not only true, but hilarious!
Saw Bill at The Funny Bone comedy club in Cincinnati in the 80’s when he was just starting out. Had everyone in the place holding their stomachs in pain from laughing so hard. Still hilarious. Great delivery. Doesnt have to drop f-bombs like so many, past and present. Probably my favorite comedian ever.
Years ago, I heard Bill Engvall tell this joke when he played at the Genesee Theatre in Waukegan, IL. After he said that the correct answer is Fiji, he started doubling over laughing, saying we should have seen the looks on our faces, we must have been that shocked. Fun times. Fun times.
Thanks for the years of laughter, Bill. Here's hoping for a lot more.
I can listen to Bill Engvall tell the same jokes for days and still die laughing!!!!
Same!
@@juicyjesstv he and the rest of the boys KILL IT EVERY TIME!!!
Same 🤣🤣
Me too. lol
I think that's what they call a "dry" sense of humor
I just laugh so hard when I watch him. Love his comedy
He is so funny! Clean comedy. He is adorable!
I love his stories.😂😂🤣🤣 The Renaissance Fair is hilarious.
And true!!! Lol
In all fairness, the Preacher did not specify if he was speaking geographically or anatomically.
Hey I gotta is a time for
This comment is brilliant
Exactly. It's the definition of a vague and poorly phrased question.
“What country are the women’s hair the most naturally curled?” There is the question that can’t be misinterpreted.
LMAO, 'spot on' indeed!...
Fiji would not have been MY first thought either...
The best way to start a joke, "then she brought me to a renaissance fair." 😂
That was his hope as a married man to get laid
Oh now I can refer to lady parts now as "Fiji!" LOL. No wonder Marlon Brando loved it so much. LOL
LMAO!
Thank you for this
I was raised in Fiji. Those Fiji fro women are curly. Curlier than Africans women.
I would have thought the same thing ! Next they better specify what they want ! Lol !
They need to say “in what country do women...”
@@maximumeffort5877 I was thinking the same thing lol, otherwise I would have answered the same way.
To be fair to Bill, I would have answered the same way, and I'm a woman!!
Well I don't because you edited it out!
@@maximumeffort5877 one of those trivia games where they don't tell you the category first.
Sounds like someone slipped different trivia questions with the churches. 😂💀👀
Hahaha love Bill! Thankyou for sharing the best medicine!! Laughter!!! :-))
I know why Romeo and Juliet killed themselves,lmao🤣🤣
Joann P at least they had a turkey leg
badlandskid
Lol.
Seriously. My aunt was trying to convince me to go to a Renaissance fair today and I politely declined. I spent the day sweating and working on my project car and know I had a better time doing that than I would have at the fair. Just the thought of going to one gives me a headache.
Joann P that’s right, in deed we do. It turns out our english teachers have lied to use for decades hahahaha.
Nolan LaValley
Totally,lol
This man is a national treasure.
Now I have to watch the whole thing.
“I didn’t know! I thought my answer was spot-on!”
That’s what everybody says lol.
Even in her hardest moments, all I have ever had to do to make my daughter pee her pants laughing is either show a video or act out your "dorkfish" bit. She's in her 40's now and it still works. Thank you Bill.
To the answer that got him thrown out of church ,I was thinking the same as Bill.
When I was around 7 or 8, I was kicked out of Sunday school. We were being told how jesus rose from the dead. I then asked "so, jesus was a zombie?" The teacher looked at me like I was nuts. Then tried to tell me that he wasn't. I of course said that he was a zombie. We argued for a while. He then kicked me out of his class forever.
My parents were called to advise them that they needed to take me in hand. See, Adam and Eve got kicked out of the Garden of Eden and their sons married girls from the community. I wanted to know where those girls came from if Adam and Eve were the only two created people on earth before they had sons.
My mother was told that I shouldn’t return to the summer bible school class because I, “…asked too many questions and was upsetting the other children”. In reality it was the bible school teacher that was upset because she couldn’t answer my very reasonable questions about how all the supernatural stuff worked.
Getting kicked out of bible school turned out to be the best day of my childhood!
@@onemercilessming1342pretty simple, those girls were their sisters, but at that time, the diseases and mutations that come from this sort of union were not prevalent. God told people to be fruitful and multiply, so to fulfill this mandate they had to marry their sisters, but much later on this practice was forbidden .
So there were no other humans for the sons to marry.
@@SgtRock57 That's Jehovahs Witnesses point of view.
Disgusting @@SgtRock57
Your answer is always spot on Bill. I would Pitchin an extra 100 bucks to the church donation basket 😆.
LOL my hubby won't even go with me for the beer!!!! 😄
Tell him how my wife got me to go. There are acres of boobs on display. I went to the next fair in the area.
God Bless you Bill
I think they would answer the same way in Fiji.
😂😂😂
Good answer! Good answer!..... oh,wait. This ain't family feud
Just what I needed tonight Bill, love these new uploads man! Hope one day you’ll do one more North American tour. Have a blessed night.
It’s nice to hear funny without a lot of cussing..!
It is nice I don’t blame ya but telling jokes with cuss words can be funnier but without cussing it’s still can be funny.
@@jaredbrewer3222 I'm no prude. I love a good dirty joke, but my grandkids love playing with papa's phone so I gotta be careful lol
Try Dry Bar Comedy.
@@samanthajones5510 I love that channel !
Agree 💯.
I absolutely love the RenFaire!! Season Pass Holder!
I want a pillow case with Hank Williams Jr. Lmbo
In high school, I got tasked with arranging a re-enactment for American History class... so I choose the occupation of Lebanon! It was the mid-80's, so most kids in our class already had some form of military fatigues in their wardrobe... so everybody quick threw them on, marched into the scene, and just sat-around doing nothing for a few minutes, then got-up & left when order to withdraw was given.
I'm glad he answered the question otherwise i would hand been wondering...
I always liked Bill Engvall. Katniss' father … LOL!!
The woman at 2:38 looks so worried -- like her darkest secret is about to be revealed
I love Bill, he is my favorite
That why I tell them to shave it bald 😂🤣
I would've agreed with you Bill, my mind wasn't thinking geographical, that was such a trick question!😂
at 0:48 that dude in the audience's nose! Rivals Gavin Free
We will see him on stage next week/ can't wait!
You never disappoint!
Fiji is still south of the Equator.
Just love this man!
I got kicked out of Church too, when I told minister I thought God was a Baseball fan rather than basketball, after minister spent $ millions on basketball court!
Me...”Vajayjay.”
Pastor wide eyed “No, it’s Fiji.”
Me... with a confused look “That’s what I said, Fiji. I don’t understand why you said no?”
...... Spot on! .... lol! ...
I immediately thought the same thing. The happy place ;)
Giggity
Love ya Bill!!!!!!!
You are awesome😂😂😂😂
This is hilarious 🤣 !!!
He is so freaking funny!
Ohh-Yeahhh, Down Under!!! Here's Your Sign... LMAO
An innocent mind would have thought that meant Australia. 🤣🤣
Yall should make a longer video love u Bill
Should've just said "Brazil." Nice, safe, sounds good, answer.
OMG !!! Lmao....
I wish you would come down south to Georgia area , pick up Jeff too if you want....lol
I would love to hear you one night
Hi, Jill, from Seattle. I grew up in South Georgia and lived there for a while as an adult. Dougherty and Lee counties.
KID ROCK you nailed it. Lived some teen years in Albany, moved away for quite a few years, moved back for a couple then found a great job on a Lee County plantation as a house manager, and lived out there, too. Loved my job, enjoyed living there, but missed the west coast and my family who had moved out here. Been around Seattle for quite a while but had fun with my best friend who hadn’t been in the south on a trip to Georgia a few years back.
Proof that obscene language, isn’t necessary for comedy. Thank you Mr. Bill…lol
Omg when he got the the flags, its true!
That was good 😂
Fiji, Fifi. Same thing 😂
Love it!
He's got to be in the top 5
Absolutely priceless,hole in one,OMG,come bill u did know its was Fiji,everyone know that,not...thanks u real funny...comedian
One minute am I related to bill engvall? Seriously ask ANY of the guys in my family the same question and we’ll give the EXACT SAME ANSWER!!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I must be related to BOTH of you! I would have said Africa too.
Pretty darn good
Hahahaha you so funny keep at it .
I've been to a civil war battle reenactment and they use horses
I am one of those goobers. I like Renaissance festivals.
Thanks for self identifying. Your sign will be in the mail. 😉
Hey Clyde Balcom
I went to only ONE
Renaissance Fair back when I was a hippie. It was absolutely frightening as I was on acid. The costumes all looked like Halloween on steroids, the sprites hanging in the trees seemed evil and I can't describe how horrible those whole roasted turkey legs looked as so many folks were strolling about with them in their paws.
NEVER WENT AGAIN!!!
✌ 💜 🙋
I am expexting it on a hat or T-shirt now...."I am a renaissance Goober" Heeere's my sign! 🤣
Joanna Edwards
It might have helped to know the working Rennies were also likely tripping.
Is it bad that I can't tell if this was shot in 1999 or 2019?
Nope it's ok
Does it have anything to do with bills age? 😂
This was back in 2012
Reply to Brad not Landa
I had a neighbor in West Virginia whose father WAAAAAAY back in the woods had to be dragged to a Holy Roller church. He list off his wife by saying the people were all faking it.
One Sunday they were speaking in tongues and rolling on the floor and he gently rolled a pillowcase with a skunk into the church, and apparently that transcended all the "mystical" tongues an transported the most ecstatic floor rolling acrobat outside as fast as possible.
¥€$
Been there, loved it, but..yea.
I'd be thrown right out with you, I Swear that would have been my answer, As soon as you said Fiji I was Like ,
Ooooooooooooooo.
GS Bill Engvall 😂😂😂
I believe General Patton’s grandfather was in the Civil War. He fought for the Confederacy. He was a graduate of VMI, Virginia Military Institute.
LOL!! Hilarious!!
Great video
I had a group of friends i would go to ren fest's when i was still living in Texas. My main reason for going was sword shopping. Last one i went to was the Texas ren fest in 2007 near Houston. We saw a big sign not too far from the fest on the way there that said " Sword Sale". We immediately pulled to where it was. My friend bought a good sized dagger and i bought a miniature Katanna set with 3 swords and stand for under 15 bucks. I keep as a display piece in my living room window.
We did get to the fest. did the usual tour of the vendors. Watched the jousting and grand mellee battle. Had what they called a dragon sandwich there. BBQ beef with onions and a good spicy sauce, best sandwich ever. Bought another sword and t-shirt. Spent 20 bucks on each, sword was a double edge short sword with a leather sheath and strap. I've worn it on Halloween a few times since.
Hadn't been to one since i moved to Kansas. Nothing happens around here other than the occasional tornado that will destroy part of town.
This man is hilarious!!! 😂😂😂
Knew it was coming! LOL!!
😾😹...
🚬👓...
I got kicked out of Sunday school for asking why we have fossils of dinosaurs, but not in the Bible ??!! Lol😊
Figi it is! Oh, your such a Figi!!
0:49 that nose tho
OMG... too funny
Lmao. Oh.. too funny
Ohhh how I wish I had been able to attend.. lolol
FUNNY STUFF!!!!!
OMW Too Funny
LOL....apparently it's Fiji!!!!!!
Greatest comedian. Love all your stuff. I've been watching everything on CZcams. It's been a long time since I've laughed so much. Can you put up more. Some of us on fixed income can not afford to go to your shows.
I liked your answer better! ❤❤❤
I got kicked out of a church once....told them i was catholic....they told me never to come back im not welcome. I said well damnit steve we will talk about this at the pub after church....yeah...they didnt like that one neither lol
I'm banned from Catholicism.. Best thing that ever happened to me lol
either
@Bas Wenmakers Be yourself man.. If they dont like your questions and opinions then theyre not your real friends. Real friends listen and dont try to persuade. Thats just my 0.02
@Bas Wenmakers Hey man.. If youre happy with the results and you have a connection with these people that makes life better.. Then im genuinely happy for you!!
@@scottbrown6505 What, were you were excommunicated? I didn't think they did that anymore. Details, please!
Bahahaha!!
❤️❤️🤣🤣🤣
And tell me there's a continued vid After This One
HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA
You are hilarious 💜
Lol
your story about 1st medical maijuanna exp had litterally holdin my side,,great tale,lol
I loved that one too....Part 1 and 2.....omg.....hilarious..
,¥
BAWHAHAHAHAHA 🤣
I've been to one it was fun, great time human cess board ...xxx
Okay where's the video that goes Before! this one 😆
Excommunicated
LMBO the hair joke was good. I was thinking why would a church say something like that but I should have known it was a Country.
😂🤣😂🤣😂