Skyrim - The Vampire That Couldn't Slow Down
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- čas přidán 31. 05. 2024
- (73) Sometimes you make your own quests. Today's quest is "Follow the vampire."
🔥 / mikeburnfire
👾 / zach_hazard
👾 / mikeburnfire
🥽 / discord
🕊️ / mikeburnfire
🕊️ / zach_hazard - Hry
Little did Zack know, his following the burning vampire would be considered the birth of the Skyrim Marathon that is still held to this day.
It's pronounced Za-choo.
Skylimics
Burning vampire lady: ""That day, for no particular reason, I decided to go for a little run."
12:37 “Burger Jarl, a meal worth burning for”
"Where is Papa?"
"He left to fight in the war. For the Stormcloaks."
"Last time you said he was fighting for the Empire."
"Go to your room kid."
for real though, the audio getting distorted every time zach goes underwater is the best little detail on youtube
Zach just dissing crab and we, as viewers, should remind him he asked his mother, as a Leopard cub, for Crab Rangoon
But vast majority of crab rangoon is made with imitation crab meat aka white fish.
Ah yes my favourite show!
Zach visually exemplifying ADHD
"Burger Jarl. We'll add blood to it."
Note, this special promotion is only available in Sylvania and other select areas.
And thus, on this day a grand fun run was born...
Travelers far and wide would run the length of the vampires path whilst aflame with a special magic fire that doesn't burn the skin!
Many to this day have heard the vampires voice, claiming they heard "ow fcucfuckfuckfuck I'M BURNING UP HERE AAAAAH"
come to the skyrim fun run, sponsored by the collage of winterhold and their headmaster... who for some reason is still the headmaster even though he never is at the collage...
The fun run isn't for the faint of heart, the following dangers apply.
Wolf attack, foresworn raids, potential vampire attacks and attacks by Zach as you have cool weapons or armour.
@16:50 There is actually one muddy lore detail I can immediately remember. Mankar Cameron, the antagonist of Elder Scrolls 4: Oblivion is a High Elf like his father, but his mother is a Wood Elf, which defied the established lore that the mother's race would be what the baby is born as.
There’s a theory that Camoran might have made himself into an Ayleid using what he learned in the Mysterium Xarxes and what he understood of CHIM.
Edit: To clarify I don’t subscribe to this theory I think they just made a mistake on either what race his mother was supposed to be or what race he was supposed to be. Either is possible Camoran is a well-known name in Valenwood with High elves, Wood elves and exiled Ayleids.
You guys basically stumbled upon Hjalti's sword. Normally, you're supposed to talk to the ghost who then requests it from you. Its a reference to Hjalti Early-Beard who is one of three individuals supposedly making up Talos A.K.A. Emperor Tiber Septim.
18:20 AND SO YOU FEEL THE POWER OF NIGHT sneakingsneankingsneakingsneaking
I like the new ork companion better then Sophia already
Eating shellfish for every meal is a great way to end up with dibilitating gout too.
10 minuets of chasing a random NPC and then getting distracted by a cave ... sounds about right for the Skyrim experience ....
9:07 edits like that are why I admire Mike's work ethic so much.
Fun Fact: there _are_ quadrupedal khajit, some the same size as a house cat some the size of a tiger, as well as a larger number of bipedal forms than have been shown in the Elder Scrolls. The shape they take is determined by the phase of the moons when they're born.
Moment I saw that Orc I knew Sofias time was up.
28:23 "What was that? I was too busy thinking about *fuUuckin'."
IRL, lobster being a luxury food came with the railways in the USA being able to delive it to places that were WELL away from the sea, where any decent sea food at all was a luxury.
5:42 Zach are you trying to say: "Variety is the spice of life?
I've heard the reason lobsters became luxury was the invention of refrigeration, making them safer to eat for much longer, as before then food poisoning from them was very common. (Fun fact, this is likely the reason why the old testiment says not to eat crustaceans)
Lobster goes bad VERY quickly because of the bacteria they carry. Like, it almost immediately starts rotting when it dies. Once trains and tourism came along, people who didn't know about its origins would try lobster and enjoy it. Demand rose, and because the lobsters had to be shipped alive, it cost more.
Zach really retold the New England indentured servant lobster thing almost verbatim but from elder scrolls perspective
I like watching the puddles gather rain
Vampire: I am speed!
Zach has systematically pissed off the entire state of Maryland with his crab rant. XD
I can't believe we're having the lobster talk. AGAIN!
16:45 hehehehehe
bretons
The state of Maryland would like to talk to you.
The only companion that zach likes- a burning vampire
Zach, Restoration is a perfectly valid school of magic
Hey Zach take a chicken foot, pull its tendon and watch the spur wiggle
Kajit being the offspring of man and a cat? Preposterous!
It was obviously an elf who had carnal relations with the saber cat!
Day I lost count of waiting for Sofia to be dragged into the most fiery pit of the Deadlands. I'd sent her to Coldharbor but she'd be into it.
Update: WE ARE FREE and got someone who seems more interesting.
Zach on crossbreeding: "The baby would be the same race as the mother"
...wait, that's correct, good job Zach :O though Mike is also right that it quickly gets blurred regardless. See the book Racial Phylogeny in game for more :)
Zach makes Ridcully look competent as a wizard
Ridcully's a good enough wizard, he's just not a competent Archchancellor.
@@MisterHalt So he's more or less Zach
I have to agree with Zach crab and lobster is not that good but if it's in something else it's amazing.
Funny thing about Khajiit, they have a subspecies that are just giant cats. Like saber cats. Just, you know. Sapient. They also have a subspecies that are little cats. Like house cats, but sapient. And you might get any of the 17 of them depending on the parentage and the phases of the moon. Mostly the phases of the moon, though.
Meh, I've eaten grasshoppers and moths. Sea crustaceans are pretty darn different on the pallet. The place I've noted crossover is in crawfish, tbh.
There was a fungus outbreak, iirc, and the lobsters (and clams/mussels) massively died off. As a result they became rarer and thus valued.
It's funny that you can hear the disdain for Sofia growing in Zach every time she opens her apple pie hole.
To be fair about lobster the kind that poor people ate would’ve had nothing in common with the kind that people with more money eat. Poor people lobster would’ve had little to no seasoning and probably only cooked to a point where it wouldn’t cause food poisoning but all the flavor was cooked right out of it. Nowadays people use all sorts of herbs and spices to cook lobster and combine with other food like surf and turf.
I enjoy ur guys's skyrim adventures Arguably more then the fallout ones. Dont get me wrong i know u guys for ur fallout adventures its what ur known for. But skyrim is near and dear to my heart and it always will be. So these adventures u guys have carry weight to me i enjnoy it more. and as u guys might of guessed companions take the place of the fighters guild in skyrim. baiscly just a mercinarys guild where they valu honor nad integrity.
That was one of the strangest encounters......lol
Gonna run all day, till the vampires gone
3:28 no, but there are Khajiit that look like Saber Cats. And some look like House cats. Depends on the phase of the moon when they were born.
"I've never had any respect for you guys" okay she's growing on me
I beat Elden Ring 10 times and it keeps being fun every single time I play it.
Supposedly, lobster became a viable food option during the second world war? Then it became depleted and exclusive as a food.
3:29 To answer Sofia's question. No, they are not related. While there are many forms of Khajiit, some of which that look like tigers and even walk on four legs, and others that look like kawaii catgirls, saber cats and Khajiit are not related.
To answer her second question, humans and elves cannot procreate with any form of Khajiit. So no, a human and a saber cat definitely couldn't either.
16:32 They can't have children together either.
16:42 It's more complicated than that. The Bretons wouldn't exist if this were 100% definitive.
zach forgets that kwama eggs are the main staple in Dunmer diet. honestly most of morrowind is made up of bugs or lizards now that i think about it.
This this is Great Keep it Up 👍
I honestly thought the title was The VIRGIN That Couldn't Slow Down...
There's probably a big, untapped market for an enchanter-blacksmith job in Skyrim society.
At least lobsters are still food. How do people even manage to trick people into thinking gold and gems are that valuable when all they were is just shining stones?
4:46 10:38 22:44
Depending on what brand you get, not sure if it's all or not, but Imitation Crab actually has some crab in it, not much, but it does have some. I've never had actual crab or lobster as I can't stand the smell of it, but I've had Imitation crab and lobster and looked at the stuff before. Though to be fair, they can put whatever they want on those to make it look believable.
10:43 Zach recognizes Rush?!
Zack! Its a banisters.
"Heraldry" a more formal name for a banner.
Enchanting plus Alchemy means you can create absolutely insane items.
I had several rings that did everything from near infinite carry weight, to limitless mana, or health so high that I didn't need armor.
Mostly what I did was build a smithing set so I could make any weapon or armor strong enough to not need to be enchanted. I hated the recharge function of using soul gems to power stuff.
Crabs and lobsters aren't bugs. They're shell fish. Zach is missing out on some really tasty meat
Unfortunately, evolutionarily speaking, Lobster is most closely related to Cockroaches.
@@Nicholas86753 That's not how arthropod cladistics work,
Rocky theme song for the vampire
Guys I want to thank you for all the random side tangents and other ADHD fueled nonsense that I love because it helped me realize that I needed help. Apparently I had more symptoms than I thought and here soon will be getting treatment for ADHD, PTSD and anxiety.
Zack and Mike's food rant is one of the things they talk about that constantly remind me they're Americans.
ngl crab cakes are pretty good. crabs themselves are disgusting little buggers. i do not miss the smell of crab fishing
XD
butter
thats why
Treasure septum racoon is zachs new spirit animal confirmed?
Ive heard zak be wrong many times but never as wrong as he is about shellfish
Hell yeah Batman
i love Sofia, definitly one of the most hilarious and well made companions imo, realy has alot of funny comments ^^ top 5 easily, alongside Recorder (for ppl that arent bothered with some sillyness and 4th wall breaking atleast >_
To be fair to Sophia, thats not THAT far off from where at least some Khajit come from
Dude, Morrowind has bugs the size of dogs, Sabre cats, and mammoths. Almost everything there has an exoskeleton.
Lobster and brisket, both food the Common folk wouldn;t eat and now everyone does
You just need knowledge of Luminal Bridges
imitation crab meat is good. too bad it was not called differently, it really cuts on the chance to find it around
lobster is considered "luxury" because lobsters takes a longer time to grow to the point it get worthy to eat them and it requiring it a non indifferent amount of care, this combined with how HARD it is to get it in area that are far away from the sea (AKA, most of the us), makes it a food that is not as cheap as it could be as a baseline
All right, now I want to see a one off of these guys trying to play Elden ring together. 😆😆😆
Nah the ad should show a vampire in his castle looking at pints of blood and to all of them he reacts like it's boring. Then he looks out the window to see Burger Jarl. And then looks up cause it's a sunny day.
Cut to a tiny montage of the vampire putting on heavy winter gear. He runs out of his castle, down the valley, through the woods, to the freeway. He bursts into flames as he gets there. He gets inside. The fires stop.
Vampire walks up to the counter and asks for number 1.
Then the announcer says "when you're craving the delicious taste of a burger jarl flame grilled steak burger nothing will keep you from it. Burger Jarl, it's a burger _and_ steak."
Then the vampire, now full, looks at the camera, worried. "Steak?" He asks and poofs out of existence like a cartoon. Cause steak, stake. Pun haha funny.
yeah it the blue neather light alright
Emotional support raccoon
What if when Klaus Schwab and the WEF says they want to make us eat bugs they actually mean lobster and crab?
Weird how npc vampires don’t die of the sun. It’d be funnier if they did and you saw them suddenly fall to the ground
Or burst into flames like some mobs in Minecraft.
When you guys playing dead space 3
You guys should do an episode of badly translated Skyrim
I'm genuinely curious if Sofia was the result of someone asking "How disgusting can we make a companion before people just want to murder them?"
They introduced me to her, I downloaded and I honestly love her. Best companion mod 10/10.
@@jab9109 Everything I've tried to say to point out how much of a horrible person she is gets deleted by CZcams
@@jab9109 CZcams won't let me argue against you
@@filmandfirearms xd
@@jab9109 Now it worked. I wonder if the almighty algorithm didn't like being pointed out
having worked at red lobster I have no clue why lobster and crab is always sold at such a premium, I'll take regular shrimp or salmon over lobster any day
Didn't mike and zach just in the last episode say vampires were just myth while hanging with the companions. I thought they'd keep up the bit
That was ages ago. They just forgot.
Yknow the weird thing about vegetarians is that they don’t eat meat and only just not meat. They eat eggs and they eat fish. They will eat aquatic animals but they won’t eat terrestrial meat.
Sea bugs are so tasty tho 🥺
Zach having a giant women preference confirmed.
(I'm sure it's been mentioned before, but I appreciate that he likes the tall ladies.)
I am playing Elden Ring right now and when I see an Ulcerated Tree Spirit I just leave the area. The loot is never worth it
13:13 Based saints and seducers ignoring
For me cracking open a crab is not worth the work
Nirnroot is actuall not valuable. Its a garbage alchemy ingredient as well.
Hey, mix mora tempalla, impstoll, and canis root to make a poision that does strong poision damage and paralysis.
Seriously I need that map mod ported to xbox with all my soul. (And also for the Bethesda mod browser to not suck ass)
I feel like a doofus, but which album are you referencing at 10:45?
Chances are the vampire wasn't taking any damage at all. However the sunlight damage effect *is* pretty crap. It's more annoying than anything, but I have seen it kill players with vampirism before at higher difficulties.
Sofia casually showing _blistering_ racial insensitivity toward Khajiit and a general disregard for the poor and homeless. She's a real catch.
I WANNA JOIN THIS SQUAD
what mod is that orc follower from?
It's never been clear how soul trapping and soul gems work. From Arena to Morrowind, all living and even unliving beings could be soul trapped in regular soul gems. Even people. Then for some reason in Oblivion the only way to trap a person's soul was to use a black soul gem. Which only the followers of Mannimarco know how to make.
And now in Skyrim you can find black soul gems basically anywhere.
I've heard it has to do with what guild makes the soul gems, and apparently the one in Morrowind made theirs so they could trap people? It doesn't make much sense to me.
With this in mind, the level of soul an NPC has should not be taken as proof of a species being people or animals. Like the Falmer. Just because most Falmer have petty or lesser souls does not mean they are no longer people.
Why does everything sophia says have to be sexaul i dont understand it
It was one of the first spicy, fully voiced, companions made for Skyrim back in 2014.
Any companion being fully voiced was still fairly rare back then iirc, and she had considerably more lines than the default companions, so she became quite popular.
People either quite liked the innuendos, or at least tolerated her, just to not hear "I'm sworn to carry your burdens" for the 500th time.
80th & 8th