7 Red Flags of A Toxic Relationship

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  • čas přidán 11. 09. 2022
  • This video applies to anybody. Sometimes, red flags in relationships can be hard to spot, especially when you're directly involved in it. If you are already in a relationship, ensure that these red flags aren’t a part of your relationship.
    If you are ready to look for love, here are a few red flags of a toxic relationship.
    So, do any of these red flags remind you of someone?
    Writer: Ananya Sawarkar
    Script Editor: Denise Ding
    Script Manager: Kelly Soong
    Voice Over: Amanda Silvera ( / amandasilvera )
    Animator: Maynard Awayan [(new animator)
    CZcams Manager: Cindy Cheong
    References-
    Stephanie Cornwell (April 30, 2021). 11 Red-Flag Signs of a Toxic Relationship. Retrieved from www.realsimple.com/work-life/family/relationships/toxic-relationship-signs
    Young Entrepreneur Council (YEC) (February 12, 2020). 13 Red Flags of Toxic Relationships. Retrieved from www.success.com/13-red-flags-of-toxic-relationships/

Komentáře • 493

  • @Psych2go
    @Psych2go  Před rokem +111

    How's everyone doing today?

  • @psych2gomandarin
    @psych2gomandarin Před rokem +732

    0:00 intro
    0:41 1、controlling behavior
    1:23 2、there's a lack of communication
    2:10 3、the give and take is consistently only one way
    2:43 4、there are no boundaries in the relationship
    3:25 5、your partner uses your personal information against you
    4:09 6、they do not acknowledge your relationship in front of other people
    4:35 7、you are constantly surrounded by negative energy
    5:21 conclusion
    5:39 outro

    • @Kamix98PL
      @Kamix98PL Před rokem +9

      I have all 7!

    • @khalilahd.
      @khalilahd. Před rokem +6

      Thank you

    • @neurohealthfocus
      @neurohealthfocus Před rokem +3

      @Psych2Go would be great if you can add chapter markers like this to all your videos. I like to get an overview of anything (am dyslexic) before diving in.

    • @psych2gomandarin
      @psych2gomandarin Před rokem

      @@neurohealthfocus 😁

    • @fy4729
      @fy4729 Před rokem +2

      Why did she describe my whole relationship lmao

  • @shaneecetaylor
    @shaneecetaylor Před rokem +278

    1.) Controlling Behavior
    2.) Lack of Communication
    3.) Give and Take is constantly one side
    4.) There are no boundaries in relationship
    5.) Your partner uses your personal information against you
    6.) They don’t acknowledge your relationship in front of others
    7.) You’re constantly surrounded by negative energy

    • @MandalorianOfMiatas
      @MandalorianOfMiatas Před rokem +3

      Yep. Just ended mine. It was 2, 3, 4, and 6 that was going on with her.
      It's to think about what could've been yet will never be realized. However, it helps me think that I'm feeling healthier, more balanced, now that it is over

    • @It_is_Tyler
      @It_is_Tyler Před rokem +3

      8) You wonder if your relationship might be toxic

    • @caulifloweranimates5922
      @caulifloweranimates5922 Před rokem +1

      my cousins be like:

    • @Unknown-xv8lj
      @Unknown-xv8lj Před rokem +1

      Oh shiiiiiiiit…

    • @theimpossiblemary
      @theimpossiblemary Před rokem +2

      Yeah, it checks. My previous relationship was toxic as hell.

  • @catalina1816
    @catalina1816 Před rokem +346

    i’m currently not in a relationship, but this is always good advice to look out for when I am in one.

    • @AtkataffTheAlpha
      @AtkataffTheAlpha Před rokem +28

      It doesn't just go for relationships, all these go towards friendships and friends as well.

    • @WolfLadyZoey
      @WolfLadyZoey Před rokem +3

      @@AtkataffTheAlpha I was just about to say that XD

    • @khalilahd.
      @khalilahd. Před rokem +1

      Same here

    • @The-hamster2471
      @The-hamster2471 Před rokem +5

      @Cactuss why so mean. Hmm guessing that you are on a toxic relationship CZcams video you must really need therapy.

    • @georgewashingtonsar-1527
      @georgewashingtonsar-1527 Před rokem +1

      @@The-hamster2471 they’re just wanting attention, the internet, but they got their attention so yeah

  • @KycenPetersen
    @KycenPetersen Před rokem +534

    Yup, basically just happened with my former friend and I today, I was trying to reconnect after three months with a potential home visit. But she lied to me and said it wouldn’t be possible. She then told our mutual friends to not tell me about her because I was being “creepy and obsessive.” After all I’ve done for her she treats me like dirt. I’m glad she’s gone now.

    • @itdobelikeda
      @itdobelikeda Před rokem +60

      Sometimes toxicity runs two ways. Check yourself and then check them. Always check yourself first! ...just saying....

    • @KycenPetersen
      @KycenPetersen Před rokem +33

      @@itdobelikeda yeah, that’s why I always asked her stuff before I did anything. I’ve let friendships drift slip away from me before and I didn’t want this one to. Just turns out she awful with guys and couldn’t handle me getting close to her again.

    • @itdobelikeda
      @itdobelikeda Před rokem +7

      @@KycenPetersen okay?

    • @luckycharm1212
      @luckycharm1212 Před rokem +36

      @@KycenPetersen you've left friendships drift away in the past. So now you may be trying to hold things tightly (of course without your awareness). That would've appeared obsessive and creepy to her. It doesn't make her a bad person. Clearly she felt unsafe with you. And you seem to be expecting a lot from her. You need to give because you "want" to give not because someone will give it back to you or treat you well. It sounds hopeless but I believe we all can improve. So don't give up on yourself or others and try to find a balance. You will make it one day.

    • @itdobelikeda
      @itdobelikeda Před rokem +8

      @@luckycharm1212 couldn't have said it better myself 👏🏻

  • @Hiswoman4ever
    @Hiswoman4ever Před rokem +89

    This was so helpful…I didn’t know how toxic my relationship was until I watched this video. He’s been controlling and manipulative since the beginning and I was SO blind. I will be breaking up with him to keep what self esteem and dignity I have left he hasn’t already shattered. In my deepest regards, thank you.

    • @Hiswoman4ever
      @Hiswoman4ever Před rokem

      @Habiba Isah musa I’m so happy for you two!✨ I’m glad your relationship was fixed because not many of them do.

    • @dericmederos1514
      @dericmederos1514 Před rokem +3

      For me, it was with him messaging me about stuff only to disappear for days then come back and say "sorry for being so late" and this happened through the relationship.

    • @melynn_0355
      @melynn_0355 Před rokem

      yeah, it's what I'm dealing with now...

    • @umrahkhairjamal2157
      @umrahkhairjamal2157 Před rokem

      I feel you I jus came out of a relationship which had all of these signs 🥲

  • @gaydragonsq4101
    @gaydragonsq4101 Před rokem +28

    Just to let y’all know, this happens all the time in platonic relationships too, not just romantic

  • @sats2407
    @sats2407 Před rokem +12

    love and lack of self-respect are never synonyms, if somone is trying to make you believe they are RUN

  • @UndercoverTherapist
    @UndercoverTherapist Před rokem +66

    As someone who has come across many people in this type of relationship, I can truly say that toxic relationships can be very draining and damaging to both our physical and mental health.
    I really hope more people recognize the toxic traits in their relationships and run away from them. And I wish that more resources like this video will be available to guide people on how to identify and deal with toxic relationships.

    • @johnq4520
      @johnq4520 Před 5 měsíci +1

      (I know this comment is old) but that's exactly what I'm dealing with right now. A woman who I'd hooked up with a while back wouldn't even give me a day to myself. She basically would stalk me until I gave in. Any suggestions?

  • @stayhappylittlemermaid
    @stayhappylittlemermaid Před rokem +11

    The most important thing is to stay positive.

  • @citizenpunx
    @citizenpunx Před rokem +66

    I had an ex meet my parents for the first time on a plane ride. We were taking her with us on a ski trip. She proceeds to get absolutely wasted on the plane, decides to scream at me the whole time about not wanting to be there. Once we land and she sobers up, she acts like nothing was wrong, and takes zero responsibility for embarrassing the sh*t out of me. LOL
    Holy red flags Batman

    • @AbhiKhatri
      @AbhiKhatri Před rokem +3

      hahahaha wtf is holy red flags batman! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @AbhiKhatri
      @AbhiKhatri Před rokem +1

      Henny Klay! 🤣

    • @lindziep6319
      @lindziep6319 Před rokem +8

      😳🚩 truly red flag she didnt even say sorry 😶

    • @crisagor2111
      @crisagor2111 Před rokem +1

      why is it so hard for someone to love us back tho we almost lost ourselves just to give them all 😭

    • @lindziep6319
      @lindziep6319 Před rokem

      @@crisagor2111 yes it is really a mystery why cant we find the exact partner that we really need 😄 its been ages before i can truly find mine

  • @pixelasm
    @pixelasm Před rokem +130

    I would add that RELATIONSHIP is a general term and the mentioned flags could (in my opinion also should) be applied to family members as well.

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem +14

      Yes, this can apply to any type of relationships.

    • @tapanmishra6666
      @tapanmishra6666 Před 8 měsíci

      ​@@Psych2go😢 Right

  • @jeffreychandler8418
    @jeffreychandler8418 Před rokem +11

    literally every single one of these with my close friend from undergrad. She was so incredibly abusive. I was really good about communicating, being forging, working hard to improve the relationship, hell I flat out gave her the tools for a healthy relationship by the communication. At every step she would pretend to go for better and closer, then turn away from it, by actually punishing me for DARING to speak up. She hid me from her friends and family. She was so judgemental towards others and then it all turned to me. I told her vulnerable stories about my life and she twisted them to suit her biases and desires, hurting me in the process. I expressed dozens and dozens of boundaries, all of which she ignored (she then accused me of not following boundaries). It was a relationship that was, without a doubt, 100/0 effort. Yet she called me the transactional one. Anytime I communicated she would shut down. Anytime I asked her to set a boundary so we could prevent further problems she wouldn't give one (better yet, she started changing boundaries retroactively to paint me as worse). Instead of just FUCKING TALKING WITH ME she would disappear for days or weeks then come back as if nothing happened, and would be incredulous if I called her on it. Which leads to the final one, She admitted to purposefully witholding conversation to punish me, then blamed me for it. This is in addition to constant invalidation of my values, my feelings, my interests, my existence. This is in addition to her promises of more whilst actively rejecting. This is in addition to her demanding affection at extremely odd times while being downright furious if I dared ask for 1% of what she demanded from me.
    What an absolutely horrible person. The damage has been... permanent. Just an absolutely awful experience.
    Thank you psych2go for doing something to help raise awareness about these problems and how to identify them. the more people we can get out of such relationships the better.

  • @stepha_nieee
    @stepha_nieee Před rokem +63

    it took my s/o & i almost 4 years & 2 kids to put all of our effort in, & we learned so much after paying attention to what actually needed to be done. some days it’s 50/50, others it’s 80/20. it takes patience, it takes tolerance, it takes being able to pick your battles, & it takes respect & communication ! 🥰

    • @MusicFlyte
      @MusicFlyte Před rokem +5

      This is great to hear. It's amazing to read a success story in the comments for a change. I wish you all the best.😁

  • @Yeen029
    @Yeen029 Před rokem +26

    I just went through a massive break up bc of all this. Tbh.. we were both in the wrong. We both brought negative energy into the relationship and were constantly stressed about eachother. Yes, we always had fun together, we always had great times, but we were never okay In private. We broke up about 3 weeks ago on mutual understanding. We are still buds, and possibly might take another jab at the relationship thing. But we made it a point to better ourselves first before we can even consider it. Now we are using eachother as motivation, and we never been happier!

  • @mileven3ggo3njoyer
    @mileven3ggo3njoyer Před rokem +97

    I had a girlfriend with some of the traits in this video. The biggest one was definitely hiding the relationship. She hated when I told people, especially around her friends. That’s how we got into a fight and why she broke up with me. :/

    • @taylermuilenburg5029
      @taylermuilenburg5029 Před rokem +19

      I think she did you a favor right there, bud. Breaking up with you.

    • @mileven3ggo3njoyer
      @mileven3ggo3njoyer Před rokem +1

      @@taylermuilenburg5029 The drama was never fun so I agree.

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem +16

      That's really toxic.. if someone is not proud to present you, that could be a sign they are not fully committed. It's good you got out.

    • @taylermuilenburg5029
      @taylermuilenburg5029 Před rokem +1

      @@mileven3ggo3njoyer Well, I'm happy you got out!

    • @taylermuilenburg5029
      @taylermuilenburg5029 Před rokem +1

      @@Yumeyori_Luna Glad you hopped out of that "relationship".

  • @MrDaRiAn21
    @MrDaRiAn21 Před rokem +23

    Five, six, and seven were my parents growing up. I learned in therapy years ago as a man in my twenties to call them out for their behavior, and they got upset , but overtime, it became less

  • @hellopsyche7555
    @hellopsyche7555 Před rokem +5

    "Bitter ending is better than endless bitterness"

  • @depresso666_
    @depresso666_ Před rokem +6

    Over giving gifts and attention are also red flags..
    It might seem so sweet at the first time but eventually it became "tools" to manipulate the other person ..
    For example :
    I was having an argument with my ex and they always said, "I gave you everything and aren't those things enough? You should be thankful that I provided you anything you need"
    And at that moment they only wants me to feel guilty for being ungrateful to the things that I never asked in the first place -_-

  • @anna.2510
    @anna.2510 Před rokem +13

    7 red flags of a toxic relationship
    1. 0:42 controlling behavior
    2. 1:24 lack of communication
    3. 2:11 give and take is constantly only one-way
    4. 2:46 no boundaries
    5. 3:29 uses your personal information against you
    6. 4:10 not acknowledging your relationship in front of other people
    7. 4:36 constantly surrounded by negative energy

  • @bees8390
    @bees8390 Před rokem +6

    This channel is hooked up to my brain and we are living in a simulation
    Every time something is on my mind this channel posts that exact thing

  • @TheNonameHousehold
    @TheNonameHousehold Před rokem +32

    I haven't started a relationship yet and I'm a little afraid to but with these videos I'm confident that I'll know what I'm doing♡

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem +3

      That's good, at least you will know what to spot, but keep in mind the real thing is also more complicated when emotions are involved.

  • @XburnerZ
    @XburnerZ Před rokem +22

    I experienced number 5 with my most toxic ex. Left me devastated and lost a lot of my friends. But eventually, truth came to life and I do still feel bad when the people who sided with her left her for the liar and how manipulative she was.

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem

      It must have been really hard to lose not your ex but also also the people around her. You must have felt very betrayed and alone. How are you doing these days?

    • @XburnerZ
      @XburnerZ Před rokem +1

      @@Psych2go I regained most of my friends that she took away from me, though I feel bad that she forced herself to be distant from us. But I guess that's just how things go. I'm happy for her now that I've seen her with a new circle of friends.
      That relationship of mine taught me how to be extremely on guard, but it's scary now that I'm seeing myself being toxic at times with my new one just because I'm trying to keep myself from the hurt. Thank goodness she's way too understandable and communicative

  • @socheata643
    @socheata643 Před rokem +12

    It’s Happens, but we’ve always got some rough moments and a few stuff but will always be together as bravery!

  • @SimplyTiggs
    @SimplyTiggs Před rokem +11

    This stuff is good to look for in all kinds of relationships- not just romantic ones.

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem

      Yep! Which of these do you find the most helpful?

    • @SimplyTiggs
      @SimplyTiggs Před rokem

      @@Psych2go Am I allowed to say all of them? If I had to be specific, I would definitely say give & take, (Mis)communication, and control

  • @KasiannaT
    @KasiannaT Před rokem +6

    I was overthinking about my relationship and this just got posted at 5 am

  • @modestyarielle2918
    @modestyarielle2918 Před rokem +9

    1. 0:44 controlling behavior
    2: 1:25 lack of communication
    3. 2:12 give and take is one sided
    4. 2:44 no boundaries
    5. 3:29 uses personal info against you
    6. 4:13 don’t acknowledge relationship in front of others
    7. 4:37 surrounded by negative energy

  • @crisagor2111
    @crisagor2111 Před rokem +2

    i always ended up hurting my self by loving and giving my all to someone 😭 it's indeed hard to find someone who would cheerish you everyday and cares for you endlessly 😭

  • @lydianici1696
    @lydianici1696 Před rokem +1

    i was in a toxic relationship for 9 months, he was even worse after we broke but i feel so much better now

  • @ArtisticSloth
    @ArtisticSloth Před rokem +2

    I used to have an online friend who called me names, often ignored me, and was draining to be around. They also most likely talked about me behind my back, but im not sure. I want to know if I was justified in ending the friendship, because im anxious that it wasn’t deserved. They did more things, but i cant think if them right now.

  • @musingsofmessa
    @musingsofmessa Před rokem +29

    I feel like I needed to see this.
    1. Controlling behavior: Yes.
    My bf wants me to be k*nky all the time, and it's suffocating because I know I can't live up to what he wants in the bedroom.
    2. Lack of communication: Yes
    My bf always tells me he is the way he is, and he doesn't want to take a break. I feel so suffocated that he's clingy.
    3. Give and take is one-sided: Yes
    Bf buys me gifts, which I'm super appreciative of, but he also takes from me so much. I give him my intimate self more often than I should. And after finding out I was r*ped by him (long story: I consented to drinking a little bit of alcohol while waiting for my mom to pick me up; he fed me the alcohol pretty much by his hand, and proceeded to record videos as he did terrible things to me that I don't remember. All I remember is telling him I need a break from us after my mom had to carry me up the stairs because I blacked out, and he didn't want to take a break), it made my PTSD go into overdrive while also making me see him less and less.
    4. No boundaries: Yes
    (Read the last section. I don't want to go into further details.)
    5. Partner uses personal information against you: Not sure
    He knows about my trauma, but keeps saying, "You treat me like I'm your ex," when I don't feel like talking to the bf (The ex was also s*xually a*usive to me).
    6. Don't acknowledge the relationship around others: Not sure.
    I mean, I think he acknowledges our relationship around others? I'm not too sure.
    When we're alone, it's different. All he wants to do is t**ch me inappropriately and be s*xual.
    I'm ashamed of myself for the relationship.
    7: Constantly surrounded by negative energy: Yes.
    When we see each other, I don't feel right. I have this pain in the pit of my stomach when I know we're going to be alone.
    There is such a thing as "being too caring" as well. I told my bf I've been sick the last couple days so I couldn't talk to him. And he said, "Is it enough to have you checked into hospital?"
    Or when I tell him, "You don't have to keep texting or calling me, or go as far as to message my mom when you can't get a hold of me." And he says, "Oh, so you want me to stop being the caring boyfriend?"
    ---
    I'm really gonna have to do some thinking on this one...

    • @harshu420
      @harshu420 Před rokem +4

      I'm a straight trans guy and I seriously felt that I wrote that comment lmao we both need to do something hah

    • @einsamerkeks5977
      @einsamerkeks5977 Před rokem +8

      Why exactly are you still with him? Sounds like a TERRIBLE person to be around.

    • @musingsofmessa
      @musingsofmessa Před rokem +5

      @@einsamerkeks5977 Because in the past, he's loaned money and bought me gifts.
      My therapist shared a poem with me that kinda helps me feel better, as I tell him about my bf a lot during our sessions.
      Here's the poem:
      You Learn...
      After a while you learn
      The subtle difference
      Between holding a hand
      And chaining a soul...
      And you learn
      That love doesn't mean security,
      And you begin to learn
      That kisses aren't contracts
      And presents aren't promises.
      And you begin to accept your defeats
      With your head up and your eyes ahead
      With the grace of a woman
      Not the grief of a child...
      And you learn to build all your roads on today
      Because tomorrow's ground is
      Too uncertain for plans
      And futures have a way of falling down
      In mid-flight.
      After a while you learn
      That even sunshine burns if you bask too much
      So you plant your own garden
      And decorate your own soul
      Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
      And you learn
      That you really can endure
      That you really are strong
      And you really do have worth.
      And you learn...
      With every goodbye
      You learn

    • @harshu420
      @harshu420 Před rokem +1

      @@musingsofmessa wasn't it supposed to be a kind gesture?

    • @kristacedergren7133
      @kristacedergren7133 Před rokem +5

      As someone who stayed in a toxic unhealthy relationship for way too long, please get out of that relationship as fast as you safely can. His behavior has gone past “red flags” into abuse. You deserve love and compassionate and to feel safe with someone. There will be others better than him.

  • @Forgotten_Winters
    @Forgotten_Winters Před rokem +3

    Even though looking at my relationship with my ex and seeing that there was 6 or possibly all 7 depending on how you look at certain things she did, I still love and miss her. I still want to spend the rest of my life with her, I swore that I would never get married but shortly before she broke up with me I changed my mind and was actually looking for a ring because I was certain I had found the one. I know she love bombed me from the start, that she lied to me, that she exaggerated things to get attention, that she tried to manipulate me into thinking and feeling whatever she wanted, that she cheated on me, and plenty more horrible things to do to someone.... But I could forgive all of it. I never felt anything negative towards her because of the things she did, in actuality all the red flags or flaws I saw in her just made me lean in and love/want her more.... Those things are what proved to me she was perfect.

    • @crisagor2111
      @crisagor2111 Před rokem +1

      i also had this kind of relationship.. blinded by those sweet words, colorful promises after he hurt me, i always wanted him more after all, but he never change his attitude towards me, yelling at me without hesitation, pointing his fingers at my face while shouting at me while im crying 😭 i wish i never love someone more than my self .

  • @ninaz.466
    @ninaz.466 Před rokem +4

    About time they made a video about my last relationship

  • @Afoxalypse7635
    @Afoxalypse7635 Před rokem +1

    I have noticed all of these signs and I honestly, feel a little more comfortable being understood, it’s a little freeing when we educate ourselves about our emotional state it’s very calming and helps us to make the tougher decisions in life.

  • @Olivia-mm3vf
    @Olivia-mm3vf Před rokem +4

    My bestie has this kind of relationship with his ex. They constantly fight in horrible ways and always get back together in the end. Everyone who sees them together, says that they're toxic but they're so codependent, that they just can't seem to be able to stay away from eachother.

    • @lauramamaciwen1019
      @lauramamaciwen1019 Před rokem

      This is really us (my relationship also kind of it)
      I have been living together with my boyfriend for 2 years. Eating sleeping doing bad or nice things together, and I bite or slap him or kick him brutally when I'm get mad, I highly regret about that but he also did the same thing like slapping me, bite me. We are in a serious dangerous situation, we hurt each other. And I cheat on him. And he might also cheat but he is good in hiding the prove. But I don't trust him 100%.
      And then after we hate and abusing each other we always comeback together and we always have sex after we fight, like a stupidity which is never changed..
      I'm tired with this situation, but my feelings are larger than my hate, I'm not sure about that guy but when he found out I was cheating he would furiously anger so bad but after that he would kiss or hug me still or still follow me everywhere I go,
      I don't know when this situation is over it seems really hard to get rid of this thing, Soo hard that all people who knows us would say we would not separate ever.. -_-

  • @deadidiot9176
    @deadidiot9176 Před rokem +1

    I get too nervous and shy around her and don't get along with her , i feel like she wants to say or do things but i push her away. Moreover we both chose to hide our relationship

  • @TheInnerPact
    @TheInnerPact Před rokem +2

    It takes two to tango…

  • @underbite471
    @underbite471 Před rokem +2

    having recently got out of a toxic relationship, there was a question from the other partner that stood out as the turning point in our time together. after i found i was putting all i could into us, their answer was simply "are we just... getting by on each other?"
    sadly i waited 22 months hoping that our 6 years of work to that point wasn't for nothing, but oh man did it ever get worse.
    now i'm out of it and they have no idea what hit. haven't been this relaxed in years lol

  • @it_steatime
    @it_steatime Před rokem +1

    I must thank your channel so much. They helped me some years back, they made me figure out that my relationship was toxic and that I should get out. I must thank you so much because you just mabye saved my life!

  • @Gamer-se3jb
    @Gamer-se3jb Před rokem +8

    thank you for making these type of videos. these videos always help me and i know they help others too, you are my comfort youtuber and thank you for always putting effort into your videos.

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem +1

      Thank you for the kind words.

  • @terrancetyrell6797
    @terrancetyrell6797 Před rokem +1

    Been there. Done that. The worst part, I feel, is acknowledging how many years I've wasted just putting up with a crappy relationship.

  • @pennybarrington6501
    @pennybarrington6501 Před 3 měsíci +4

    i think i am the toxic one in my relationship... but i don't want to break up and he doesnt either

    • @danhartman3559
      @danhartman3559 Před 28 dny

      Then, change it, learn from your mistakes, and move on to change your habits

  • @Preslie511
    @Preslie511 Před rokem +1

    i never realized the red flags until now. we’ve been together for five months now, and are now doing long distance after my family moved. only now do i realize some of the things that should be considered red flags.
    -cheating when we were together the first time
    -signs of cheating again this time
    -called my friend hot (literally when he was talking to me)
    -watches lots of porn/ hinti
    -gets upset/ jealous when i talk about other guys
    -constantly talks about how his ex got over him too fast (the girl he broke up with me for after cheating on me multiple times)
    -telling my secrets/ trusted info to people
    -trash talking my friends constantly
    -bad attitude constantly
    -rude to his family/ friends
    -wanted to keep the relationship private/ hidden (and got mad at me when people find out because his own friends told people)
    -when trying to schedule hang outs, he’s very dismissive and has my parents text his instead of us setting it up
    -forcing sexual things on me (forcing me to sit on his lap, kiss him, let him touch my 🍒, etc)
    -insults my family

  • @r.etesky2912
    @r.etesky2912 Před 2 měsíci +1

    My partner and I are both red flags waving. I am all in and want a lot of attention and sort of trying to provide the best support, giving quite a lot, meanwhile I am very jealous and sort of controlling.
    Also, I am taking jokes seriously most of the time, and my partner do make jokes that are quite mean to me and made me anxious.
    They have negative energy and sometimes warm and sometimes cold to me, but mostly kinda push me off while I am excited to hang out with them.
    Denial often, most reasons, is too much work, while trying to maintain their friend circle, I have less time and attention from them. Which kinda drains me when I wanted to hang out and have 1v1 quality time, and they just mostly hang out in the group with our friends...
    I am trying to fix my jealousy issue here and be more independent, while try not to overthink and let loose and put more trust in. Hope I can become a better person for my partner and myself.
    I think we can both do better for this "Relationship" and not making it only as a "title of status". It's my first, I can't expect it to be a calm sea to sail, though it hurts like hell sometimes due to the fact that I am very sensitive.

  • @Khadeeen
    @Khadeeen Před rokem +5

    Hiii! :) I love these videos, so thank you for making them

  • @gluggingfishie
    @gluggingfishie Před rokem +2

    Me and my partner are in a bit of a rough time atm, this has helped me see things a lot. I've been worried because (as usual) they were complaining about something in their life, despite me and a few of our friends having a conversation about trying not to dump everything so casually, and is constantly saying that they have bruises and cuts from rugby. They're getting injured daily so I gently suggest that maybe it isn't worth it because you're always saying everything hurts, and then they quit and act like it's all my fault cause I was worried for their health. I can't open up to them because A) They're always trauma dumping and I feel like my problems don't matter and B) They consistently mention their processing disorder, which is fair enough but at this point it's becoming an excuse for everything. I know very well that disorders make things hard, but again, just a few days ago we had a discussion about the fact that everyone has issues, not just you. Advice?

  • @MBTIhumans
    @MBTIhumans Před rokem +1

    you gave me the motivation to create this channel, thank you!

  • @_Sushi6569
    @_Sushi6569 Před rokem +1

    Thanks for this, it helps a lot and I look forward to your next video!

  • @IIFrozenFlame
    @IIFrozenFlame Před rokem +4

    Not sure if this is a new animator but I like this style!

  • @madisonbills3953
    @madisonbills3953 Před rokem +3

    I just got out of a relationship where ALL of this was happening. I still love her, but I'm glad that negativity is no longer in my life!

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem +3

      Happy to hear that.. sometimes it really takes the right person to fit in with your values and lifestyle.

  • @DontReadMyName9461
    @DontReadMyName9461 Před rokem +3

    I used to be toxic towards my partner, and they once snapped at me and I took that as advice. We are still together and very happy with eachother. I was just smart enough to understand my wrong doings and well, lucky enough that they didn’t leave me there and then.
    So, please. Try to acknowledge if you’re doing something wrong before it gets out of hand. Have a happy relationship.💞.

  • @mattdeleon6628
    @mattdeleon6628 Před rokem +2

    Omg there were a lot of red flags from my last relationship.
    I brought up something that bothered me and they apologized… At first. A few days later, they bring the incident up again and said “That’s the way I am.”
    There was no equal give and take at all. I paid for every date, got flowers, gifts, but they still wanted more. (pay for literally everything)
    Post break up, we tried to remain friends even while I was hurting inside but they would only text me for favors or to vent and receive validation. One night after they vented to me, I had enough mental stress and completely cut all communication.
    Not to mention the love-bombing within 3 weeks of talking. “I’ve never met anyone like you” “I feel so comfortable around you” “i think you’re my soul mate” only to end the relationship in 3 months because she’s used to dating “weird older men with money”
    Luckily I was going to therapy and my therapist at the time brought out the DSM-5 and asked me a few questions. As it turns out, she was a textbook narcissist.
    I was ready to settle down and have a kid with this person smh. I saw the signs early on but being in-sync with someone like that drew me in. Like we would finish eachothers sentences or mirror eachother it’s like we were aligned.
    Anyway, I’m glad that’s all over but I’m still not fully over that relationship.

    • @mattdeleon6628
      @mattdeleon6628 Před rokem

      Now I definitely had my faults, but when we broke up, I thought EVERYTHING was MY fault until my therapist told me otherwise. During that session, she told me, “You don’t have to change for anybody, remember that” and I cried more than I wanted to.

  • @nomoredatingblind
    @nomoredatingblind Před měsícem

    This is so helpful! Thank you. I’ll be creating a video to add to this discussion.

  • @tj921able
    @tj921able Před rokem +3

    I haven't experienced this in romantic relationships, but I've had some "friendships" that this happened in. I had to break off the relationship with those people.

  • @nick27march
    @nick27march Před rokem +2

    I didn't knew much about dating and relationships.A simple straightforward person fell for someone.I was true and transparent to them in all aspects.
    In terms of obedience and loyalty totally devoted.Never asked for any help except for once for a financial help,that too I later found guilty of myself.
    They wanted to pour me with gifts and would ask if I wanted any materialistic things.Once they had sent Rupees 10k in my bank account for purchasing clothes,shoes and a watch of my choice which I later returned the amount in their bank account.
    On their birthday too they wanted to send me something to which I politely denied for it was a very special gift.I didn't want them to lose their dignity and hurt my self respect.I had never asked for that gift ever after.
    Neither I wanted to feel offended nor offend them.

  • @maishafahmidamazid4875
    @maishafahmidamazid4875 Před měsícem

    All of these red flags are present in my parents relationship and they have been married for 24 years now.
    I am 23 and you guys have no idea how horrible it is to survive in such a household. Their fights make no sense, both of them are not prepared for marriage and kids. I really want to move out but I don't have any job yet. I am surviving in a horror nightmare every f*cking single day.
    Their behaviour is influencing me not to get married ever again.
    I know someone would say , your husband will not be like your dad or you won't end up fighting like your parents but you know , when you see the same fighting, insulting, screaming and mean things over and over for fu*king 23 years , you will get afraid to go down that road. It's scary... It's traumatizing.

  • @bopakboom2819
    @bopakboom2819 Před rokem +1

    i like how u keep changing the animation style

  • @philledzone
    @philledzone Před rokem +2

    Can't have a toxic releationship if you don't get any relationships 😎

  • @user-ii7pb6bx3q
    @user-ii7pb6bx3q Před rokem

    Thank you for making these videos :)

  • @iamgoddessoflove
    @iamgoddessoflove Před rokem +16

    If you are not sure whether you’re in a toxic relationship or not, ask yourself these two most important questions. How has this relationship affected my self-esteem? How do I feel when I am around my partner?
    💙CZcamsr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

  • @williamworley6164
    @williamworley6164 Před měsícem

    I shouldn't feel like I'm in a work release program.. no boundaries, no fun.. no time for a relationship with myself

  • @kyleslavik6324
    @kyleslavik6324 Před rokem +8

    Thank you for the video I needed it I feel like there's alot of weird stuff happening around me and I do feel like I'm surrounded by negative energy and like I said controlling behavior in relationships is downright unattractive and honestly drains your energy.

    • @DiscoDiva747
      @DiscoDiva747 Před rokem

      Yes I had that too recently the energy of my partner was so negative and draining I couldn't wait to get of my place it was that bad. Yes I am an empath sensitive and feel others moods but never in my life did I feel so strongly these bad feelings only when my b/f was around. Wasn't constantly but during 2 months he had "4 of these turns" deathly silence detachment sarcasm and indifferent to my attempts to communicate and talk about the issue. I was the "intense" one. How ironic he was the one with the intensity and controlling behaviour. He kept changing things around my place and once even told me wasn't right time to feed the cats! I retorted "bad enough you bossing me around but now the cats..I ignored him and fed them. I asked him to leave my place last week couldn't stand the atmosphere any longer. I don't think he saw it coming. Glad I got out of that one for sure. Started to even question myself...Not good

    • @kyleslavik6324
      @kyleslavik6324 Před rokem

      @@DiscoDiva747 Glad you got out negative energy is no joke how are you right now do you more energetic and full of life because you do deserve it you sound like your a kind and thoughtful person.

    • @crisagor2111
      @crisagor2111 Před rokem

      I'm feeling the same way right now 😔 seems like nothing is good happening to me emotionally and mentally 😭 i wonder how it feels like to have someone you can cry on whenever those feelings will strikes 😕

    • @kyleslavik6324
      @kyleslavik6324 Před rokem

      @@crisagor2111 It would be comforting.

    • @crisagor2111
      @crisagor2111 Před rokem

      @@kyleslavik6324 i don't have anyone except my self

  • @mrjace3
    @mrjace3 Před rokem +1

    When you see what little good a person has it makes you ignore all the things that give you more than enough reason to back out and head for the hills!

  • @seanclark8728
    @seanclark8728 Před rokem

    Communication was one of our worse issues. Whenever I would try to be open and vulnerable (as a man) and tell her what she did hurt me and why/how it did, she would just go into how I hurt her. Now the shift of the conversation is off of me, and invalidates my feelings and concerns to address hers and apologize to her. When her and I first met and started dating every conversation was fun and a joy to have. We smiled just from seeing each other and spent time together often. But when it turned toxic, it seemed as if we could not even hold a conversation without someone misinterpreting what the other person is saying, or cant have a simple convo without someone getting offended. A huge turn off for the both of us. 😔

  • @KatelinTheKat
    @KatelinTheKat Před rokem

    Awesome video!!

  • @khalilahd.
    @khalilahd. Před rokem +7

    This relates to every kind of relationship and though I’m not currently in a relationship this is always good advice for things you should avoid. Hope this helps someone 💜

  • @kanna231
    @kanna231 Před rokem +1

    Controlling partners have some seriously issues and really needs to be address its time to get out of the relationship and tell their families about their behavioral problems and move away far.

  • @lordesu2662
    @lordesu2662 Před rokem

    This video helped me tremendously!!!! Thank you!!!

  • @dang_sophisticated-man427

    i have been during some tough times in my relationship, feeling like i am the only one trying to keep things normal, i really love your videos, thank you very much P2G

    • @Psych2go
      @Psych2go  Před rokem

      That's good. What are some things that you to do to feel normal.

    • @crisagor2111
      @crisagor2111 Před rokem

      i can relate with every word you said .

  • @em4592
    @em4592 Před 10 měsíci

    This is a sign for anyone going through a toxic relationship. I just left my abusive ex around 3 hours ago, and I feel so relieved. It’s like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders and I finally feel free from a relationship that was holding me back. I hope you all realize your worth and realize that there are plenty of fish in the sea. Often times, we are scared to leave these individuals because they have made us feel unloveable, invaluable, and we believe that there is no one else out there for us. Please do you and your inner child a favour, and seek the happiness you deserve by leaving the toxicity and abuse. You can get through this dark time ❤

  • @allyssadeguzman5344
    @allyssadeguzman5344 Před rokem +7

    Timestamps for everyone who just wants to check out:
    1. Controlling behaviour (0:43)
    2. Lack of Communication (1:23)
    3. Give & take is consistently only one-way (2:12)
    4. No boundaries (2:44)
    5. Your partner uses your personal info against you (3:25)
    6. Not acknowledging your relationship in front of other people (4:08)
    7. Constantly surrounded by negative emotions (4:35)
    It's okay to stay fighting and believing, but please do remember that what you also feel about the relationship itself must be taken care of and heard as well, stay safe everyone!

    • @ASiteSee
      @ASiteSee Před rokem

      These 2 are the biggest ones in my relationship with my boyfriend.

  • @Bucky_Winchester
    @Bucky_Winchester Před rokem +2

    What I find very interesting about this is that if one of these things occur, the relationship can spiral down the other ones with both parties involved who start to display this behavior. Once I finally figured I didn't like the person I've become around them, it was very easy to end the relationship. One thing can lead to another and we need to pull ourselves out of this before it's too late.

  • @n1_l356
    @n1_l356 Před rokem +1

    This is a point of view from the other SIDE, but what about the toxic one ?
    IS it kind of controling love and obsession ?
    It really hurts when you see what your friend thinks about you when he's in a toxic relationship, some kind of avoiding talking, etc...

  • @Prince-cl1yh
    @Prince-cl1yh Před rokem +5

    Very on point with my relationship with my group mates, and they’re mostly girls. Also what makes the relationship toxic was to never treated equally with the specific person.

  • @brittanynorrod4161
    @brittanynorrod4161 Před rokem +3

    I can relate to some of these because I have been in a toxic relationship with a friend of mine and she would give me the silent treatment. And it was hard for me and her to get along with each other and she started being very mean and disrespectful to me

  • @goituilaviet
    @goituilaviet Před rokem

    Thanks for sharing

  • @forevergame2456
    @forevergame2456 Před rokem +5

    I love you guys so much you guys are helping me so thanks

  • @falco830
    @falco830 Před 2 měsíci

    This video actually hit the nail on the head. I was definitely in a toxic relationship. But she didn’t get to the point where she was spouting personal information. But all the other things were dead on. I kept my cool and didn’t concede my values though, so in the end the breakup was the next best thing that happened in our relationship.

  • @marvinreyes4407
    @marvinreyes4407 Před 4 měsíci +1

    Lots of people grows old never mature and wont even respect simple boundaries.

  • @crisagor2111
    @crisagor2111 Před rokem

    anghirap magmahal 😭 kahit yung taong pinaka mahal mo, hirap na hirap kang bigyan ng pagmamahal na deserve mong matanggap 😭

  • @Kanie_
    @Kanie_ Před rokem +1

    This video is very helpful for ppl who are in a toxic relationship.

  • @babycreeperadmin1233
    @babycreeperadmin1233 Před měsícem +1

    your voice is extremely calm

  • @kuitaranheatmorus9932

    I'm just so glad to watch this video

  • @chloecreel5387
    @chloecreel5387 Před rokem +1

    I had to cut one of my friend’s off because of her mental health and I’m not talking to the person anymore.
    She said she can’t be my friend anymore and I tried apologizing to her, but it didn’t work out so we stop talking.
    I am trying not to think about it

  • @Gaminghj
    @Gaminghj Před rokem +2

    Advice is advice thank you for the tips and tricks to life before it truly begins

  • @swirlingfizz9990
    @swirlingfizz9990 Před rokem +4

    My previous relationship was toxic then..

  • @han.jisungsss
    @han.jisungsss Před rokem +3

    I once dated someone and when I felt comfortable, confident in being able to tell them my insecurities they started using them as comebacks to whenever we fight. They were prob the worst ever partner I had ever had.

  • @BrotherMag
    @BrotherMag Před rokem

    Number 3 was what led me to cut off alot of friends. I feel loads better being on my own without expecting to hear back from them. One contacted me months later and didn't apologize after I was honest. No regrets on leaving

  • @sagenosnibor9173
    @sagenosnibor9173 Před rokem

    Confirmation. Thanks 👍🏾

  • @sheriewhite8405
    @sheriewhite8405 Před rokem

    Wow! I’m early, I love your vids!this is awesome!

  • @allastorm7667
    @allastorm7667 Před rokem +10

    Truth be told ive been in a toxic relationship for a long time. I just dont know what to do about it

    • @Alaynaisawesome
      @Alaynaisawesome Před rokem

      Same.

    • @aplive58
      @aplive58 Před rokem

      Do whatever feels right. I am responsible for 4 of these boxes, and my girlfriend is responsible for 1. I'm trying my hardest to be mindful of how my paranoid tendencies lead to #1 and #7, and I am giving my girlfriend suggestions as to how we can improve our communications when she is extremely busy (#2). Mindfulness is the first step to fixing a strained relationship.

  • @NoName-zh9ov
    @NoName-zh9ov Před rokem +1

    I'm gonna chime in with an important note here: its toxic only depending on the person! I'm gonna make myself vulnerable and say I portray a couple of these mainly I'm quite controlling and I struggle with communication, however those two stem from a long line of CPTSD amongst other stuff I don't want to share, running away from "toxic" people isn't always the answer. my partner is very patient and while my partner has toxic traits too we are both patient and working on them. IF said toxic person is willing and ACTIVELY changing their behaviour even if slow but there is progress, its not necessary to cut them out of your life, in fact its sometimes giving a vulnerable and hurt person a chance to become a better them and blossom the relationship be it friends family or SO (significant other). now I'm not saying EVERYONE who displays these behaviours will change, because not all will. All I'm saying is give people a chance, mistakes are made and NO ONE can change if they don't know what and HOW to change, communication is key and even that needs to be learned. not everyone has great parents or has been taught all necessary skills and need I remind people, cultures are a thing! don't push your culture on others.

  • @j1o4e
    @j1o4e Před rokem +1

    i think after going threw this more then once this year, im good on giving up and fine with being alone

  • @prototypex8217
    @prototypex8217 Před rokem +2

    I already struggle with thinking I'm not a good person, I'm pretty awful to some of those around me that aren't close friends and I don't mean to do that, but I had spoken to my now-ex about it a fair few times and each time it got progressively worse. The first time was the cheesy and open lie of "no your a good person" which yea, it's a lie but it's better than later on being told either "eh" or "yea you are" when I say I'm an awful person. I've done things I regret and I've never really fully gotten over them, I always say "time stops for noone so move past it" to my friends but I'm still stuck back on things that happened 2 years ago so I should take my own advice lol (it's always in a context of "well time stops for noone so hope things get better so your able to keep up")

    • @DrPlaguenstein
      @DrPlaguenstein Před rokem

      Words are a fluctuation of ones own weaknesses and insecurities, the first perceived problems with others is only a reflection within oneself, as weaknesses fluctuate so does strength, it's because of weakness that one can perceive different aspects that others can't, that's you're biggest advantage

    • @prototypex8217
      @prototypex8217 Před rokem +1

      @@DrPlaguenstein I'm pretty stupid so I only understood like maybe 10% of that

  • @piotraugustyniak6591
    @piotraugustyniak6591 Před rokem

    Great advice 💯👍

  • @au8438
    @au8438 Před rokem +1

    Get out as fast as you can if the problem gets worse...

  • @isaacfernandez2243
    @isaacfernandez2243 Před rokem +3

    Wow. I just broke up with my girlfriend. And...I think I made the right decision. Regardless, it doesn't seem to be the case that it was a toxic relationship, it just didn't work.

  • @Cheetoezfartz
    @Cheetoezfartz Před měsícem

    1.) controlling behavior
    2.) lack of communication
    3.) give and take is constantly only one way
    4.) no boundaries
    5.) uses your personal info against you
    6.) not acknowledging your relationship in for t of other people
    7.) constantly surrounding by negative energy

  • @madhvishukla4332
    @madhvishukla4332 Před rokem

    Thank you 🙏

  • @Calliflower
    @Calliflower Před rokem

    I dont know if thats intentional but having the bgm of Getting Over It for this topic is just chef's kiss