Opening Up About My Alcoholism.
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- čas přidán 26. 08. 2024
- Today is another episode of Justin Hawkins Rides Again...the podcast featuring my producer Jenny May Finn. After the previous episode where we discussed the darkside of being a musician on tour, I felt we should do an episode about alcohol as it plays such a huge role in that lifestyle. I try to open up a bit about my struggles with alcoholism, though I'm still a little guarded around that for variety of reason. If you're struggling with alcohol or feel it's not playing a good role in your life, or with your mental health in general check out some of these links
MusiCares: www.musicares....
www.smartrecov...
www.samaritans...
CoDA: this is for anyone who feels they are struggling with not just addiction but relationships too: coda.org/
Get a Justin Hawkins Rides Again T-Shirt & Hoodie here: thejawsofvicto...
I do monthly Zoom Call Nights over on my Patreon, they're A LOT of fun: / jushawk
Justin Hawkins Rides Again...The Podcast. You can listen on Apple Podcast, Spotify etc: open.spotify.c...
The Darkness are going on a World Tour this year to celebrate the 20th Anniversary of Permission to Land - get your tickets here: www.thedarknes...
#musicpodcast #musicindustry #recovery
Check out MusiCares if you're a musician or someone working in the industry struggling with addiction: www.musicares.org/get-help/addiction-recovery
MusiCares is awesome! They helped me through life after I lost my husband to early onset Alzhiemers. I would be homeless without them. They have also helped out many of my bandmates with everything from addiction to natural disasters. Justin please keep doing what you do and know the REAL fans love & support you fully. The music is what keeps us sane, it's the shady business part and the media that can drive us over the edge. ❤❤❤❤
Gin and more gin helped and I relate ❤me neither like drinking wine especially had a hangover before I got home it’s a sociable thing isn’t it ❤️I think Jenny is right I felt the same !!Now I don’t touch it ❤Justin hawk wind 😂😂
This video has just made me realise it’s time to stop drinking, I’ve been telling myself in my head for nearly a year now but enough is enough I just hope I have the strength to stop
Yes I forgot about the drugs when we went on a weekend bender,it’s strange I stopped ,no one understood
I knew it was slippery slope, I don’t touch it now I was a social drinker so for me it was weekends only for me but he was so sociable😂
Justin your pancreas & liver cannot tell the difference between fruit juice & alcohol.
Their is a reason why children are increasingly dying of non-alcoholic fatty liver
disease.
BTW if you ever get hunger pangs - your not feeling hungry - it's the pain of drug withdrawal. I never get hunger pains if I have stopped eating sugar first
Best widhes
I get addicted to Sugar really easily especially if I eat carbohydrate, I am currently trying to wean myself of sugar & carbohydrate yet again.
We don't need carbohydrate we can make Sugar very easily from fat and protein
... I decided to quit yesterday after many recent blackouts and unbelievable claims about what I did when blacked out. The timing of this... Thanks Justin
Good luck, don't give up if you don't actually quit. It took me about ten years of "quitting" to finally quit.
Thank you. I have struggled with other substances before, and alcohol is the one thing that always brings me back to them. I'm going cold turkey but I don't have a physical dependence yet, well, maybe slightly. It's the amount I drink that's the problem, not the frequency. Congrats on your quitting@@ChaseVonnegut
I was just like you @bankgate and next week is my 1 year sober date. You got this. It's not easy but worth it. Stay Strong
I've been sober 12 years now and never, ever thought I'd stop drinking. The first year is not much fun. You feel left out...a piece of you is gone and you have to deal with things straight on. BUT....once you get passed that and you get up in the mornings, have coffee and DON"T feel like shit....man/ma'am, that alone makes it ALL worth it. Give it some time and good luck
Good luck mate, you got this!
We just lost our son, who was 25 years old to alcohol abuse. Like many, we tried everything, but as Justin notes, the person must want sobriety. We are shattered. If you are struggling, please keep fighting. Those of us left behind wish for another day, another conversation, another hug and even another argument. Any of these would mean our loved ones are alive. Now we just have memories. Please fight for your life and if you can help someone who needs help, do try. Peace and love.
😮😢 i am sooooo sorry for you loss….god almighty. i am a father of two…. may his soul forever rest in eternal peace. i dunno what to write….love you!
@@NeilRaouf thank you my friend. There are no words and I share Sam's story in the hope it will find someone who can help, needs help, or needs a reminder of the terrible toll this can take. Much love.
That is very saddening. I am sorry to learn of your loss. Did your son die of cirrhosis of the liver?
@@dbenadonSam was/is/will be his name. beautiful name. He for sure was a wonderful person. send him my love and a high five through your prayers (or whatever you do to deal with the pain). hugs
@@Unfunny_Username_389 it was deemed "complications from chronic ethanol abuse". He had developed seizures and cardiac issues. If you looked at him, you wouldn't know. He was handsome and athletic in appearance but the alcohol consumed his body from the inside.
I was a functional alcoholic for decades. In my mid forties it became so much harder. Harder on my body and on my mental state. I realised that my issue was that I had signed some subconscious vow of mediocrity due to the fact that I grew up feeling worthless. Whenever I tried to sober up, a voice would tell me to “ get back in my lane where I belong “ and I’d relapse immediately. How I got sober was I realised that, before the world got to me… I was a happy kid. A vibrant little soul.. and that kid is still there underneath it all.. he’s just been through a LOT of stuff and he’s carrying a lot of pain. The world is hard on people. But I am still a vibrant and beautiful soul. I AM. Understanding the reality of this brings me the peace I used to seek from booze and opiates. Find and connect with yourself. The person you were before the world burned you so bad. Do it now. It changed my life.
❤
Beautiful message, thank you.
Same!
I used to say to people what you just did. thank you for your words my friend.
I wish everyone could read these words. They extend even beyond addiction. If we could all see this in ourselves and others the world would be a much more beautiful place. I’m glad you found yourself man!
Justin.
My lovely father was an alcoholic. When he found out this at 62 he was told he would always be an alcoholic for ever.
He stopped drinking and at 63 when he reached rock bottom and joined AA.
He passed away at 92 and in between 63 and 92 never touched another drop and was a wonderful man.
Hold fast, you don’t need it and if you stick to their plan you will have a wonderful life like my dad did.
Love to you and your family. Your guitar playing is part of the answer it’s amazing.
my grandfather drank all day every day. he also lived to 93.
do whatever you want. lol
AA isnt the end all be all to sobriety, it has about as a good of a success rate as any other treatments, less than some even, its only about 5% for many of them. What works for some doesnt always work for others, the key is to learn what works best for you and stick with it while putting just as much effort into recovery as you did drinking or using and surround yourself with as good of a support system as possible.
@@mezzb I'm not saying it doesn't help people, it can do wonders for some, I've seen it happen, and I'm glad parts of it worked for you, but that same organization will fill your head with messages that what your doing now isn't the right way, that your now just a dry drunk, and if you do end up relapsing at some point it's just because you didn't work the program correctly the first time. I hate this type of mentality and I think some of the rhetoric they push can be dangerous for newcomers.
The same reason you liked meetings is the same reason I hated it, I almost felt more like using after a meeting, it usually left me on edge, and sometimes feeling hopeless in various ways, like if I didn't do exactly what they said I'd never have a chance at sobriety. It sometimes left me with a lot of anxiety when I felt like I strayed from their group think and wasn't somehow walking down their "tried and tested" path. At the time there was also a lot of old timers who were so stuck in their ways and mindset and seemed to judge others and taking medications like suboxone wasn't really walking the path of recovery in their eyes. I think it's gotten better as times gone by but I can't say for sure since it's been so long, it just seemed like it was headed in that direction.
What worked best for me was co-occuring outpatient that dealt with both addiction and mental health, which usually go hand in hand, altho not always, for me it did. A lot of my use was directly related to my mental health issues which would remain after the usage was gone, getting off drugs and alcohol was usually the easy part, the mental health aspect afterwards not so much. Whereas someone like my sister, her mental health issues usually went away once she stopped using. She mostly had mental issues because she used, I used because I had mental issues. I got to do specific specialized groups on addiction and mental health education, how to deal with my mental health issues in various ways using things like CBT/DBT, stress management, meditation techniques, all sorts of different stuff. Then I had individual therapy once a week and got to see a doctor for medications once a month if need be. I know not everyone has this option and that's where something like AA can be a godsend since it's at least something, I just think there's better options out there by this point that have just as good a track record of not better than AA. It has been nice seeing the industry grow from my first inpatient to my last outpatient, probably over the span of about 13 years, as many seem to be going the co-occuring route more.
I think what you did is probably the best approach tho, go for the meetings when and if you feel like you need them (if they help you that is), especially early on, just so you're with people and not isolating and learn to open up when and if you feel like using, learn what your triggers are and build up some kind of support system if you don't have it. Learn how to live life sober and build up or rebuild some of those life skills you lost or never had while using. I think it's also important for people to find the right meeting with the right people and one that works well for them as there was many meetings I went to that didn't gel for various reasons.
Can I ask, didju work the steps at all or mostly go for the meetings?
@@RxYouthOne of the finest summaries and assessments I've read online on this topic mate. Superb. I personally opted to spend time studying what addiction actually is. I picked up an audio book copy of Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck, along with his hypnotherapy track. Not only did I never touch a drop again but it's so far off my radar I'd sooner grow a pair of wings and fly to Mars. AA members I know have told me I'm in denial or that I'm a dry drunk. I can't think of a more depressing life than being in the position where you believe the big bad wolf is going to leap out from behind a hedge and grab you in its jaws at any given moment. Some of them even went as far as to tell me I wasn't addicted which is really arrogant. They know nothing about what I went through, and to totally discount my own personal experiences is quite hurtful.
What I find so insufferable is just the vibe it breeds where its die hard followers completely throw rational and logic right out the window. They will alter or change the realities of other peoples personal experiences in order to make it all fit their unfalsifiable narrative. I.e I can't have been addicted because I'm absolutely loving being a non drinker, wouldn't touch booze with a 20 foot barge pole and it simply goes against what they have been taught. To me it feels like they are the ones in denial. Denial of their true selves and denial of their true happiness. AA understanding of addiction is outdated, but they have such a huge position of authority, people use their terminology without even realising it. Movies subscribe to their principles when covering a character caught in addiction. It's truly quite profound AA are actually the "go to" where addiction is concerned.
I'm gonna say it right here and right now: there is no such thing as being in recovery in the same way somebody who has decided to become a vegetarian isn't in recovery or somebody who quits smoking isn't in recovery. Its all AA bullshit.
There's hope yet then lol
The hardest part of quitting for me was having to get to know the real me, flaws and all, and accepting who i am. All my friends would say that i changed because they were so used to seeing me so extraverted confident crazy fun dramatic all the time when the real me was hiding behind alcohol the whole time. Quitting drinking for me was the easiest part. Learning to live from scratch was the hardest. I grew to love my true self finally. Turns out im a calm, collected, introverted (anti-idiot), routine loving, sensitive, caring, kind human being❤
Inside every alcoholic is a very good person being suppressed. Alcohol just blocks your ability to allow that person out. Well done!
I love this! I am so so happy for you! The same thing happened to me, except that I was battling an eating disorder, trying to avoid who I really was and control every little thing in my life. Once I accepted myself, all of that stuff went away and I have never felt as happy to just BE as I feel now. Your wise words reflect my experience as well. Thank you for writing this! And enjoy yourself and your life!
@@on_my_own_two_feet ❤️⚘️
What an amazing insight. I'm 6 weeks in and beginning to feel things like this. Thanks for sharing.
@@DenaRose-di9ofBut there's an issue with introversion, it VERY quickly and EASILY becomes chronic lonliness and than isolation.
I've experienced both, and I'd much prefer to be effortlessly outgoing and extroverted, than to be this shell of a human.
Thank you so much Justin. Three days sober and it's gonna be four. Thank you so much for helping me get through the night.
Keep grinding man🙏
Four now!👊
You can do it!
If you’re physically addicted to alcohol, go to rehab. Getting off alcohol when you’re seriously addicted can be lethal without supervision. Just saying in case
you can do this! i did it 15 years ago. it will not be easy at times. it will always be worth it! if you reply to this and you need any help at all or need to talk i will make that possible. God Bless You!
I' m 1 month and 5 days into quitting alcohol forever. I'm so glad I did. You're an inspiration Justin.
Keep going! Good man
keep it going....
Good stuff !
Thanks guys, i wont stop
Are you sure you have quit...The Devil has got different temptations ....Come close to God son...
Justin, i have 15 years clean from heroin and everything else. i want to thank you for using your platform and position to help, inform and give hope to so many people! God Bless You!
Keep up the good work my man! Should be proud of yourself
This is my 15th year off heroin as well. Well done!
I’ve been sober for just short of 15 months. Drank daily for 15 years…drank insanely for about 5, from the moment I woke til i passed out with a drink in hand. I feel lucky to be alive! It’s never to late to get sober!
Well done fella 😁
Stay strong!
Good for you man x
God bless you I still struggle.
1 year 7 months
I’m 6 months sober after pancreatitis landed me in ICU & I nearly died. So much healthier & happier now.
Exact same thing happened to Me it's the most painful thing ever I was in ICU also noone would drink again after experiencing pancreatitis
Worst pain ever! If that isn’t rock bottom, I don’t know what is.
Congrats on your sobriety and pulling for you!
@@seashellspeerI wish it had been for me. I believe I was 19 or 20. The doctors kept telling me that this was disease that happens to 50 year old alcoholics. That I had one foot in the grave. It did scare me enough that I stopped drinking for a month. It’s taken many years after to finally stop. But yes, even while drunk the pain was some of the worst pain I’ve ever felt to this day.
Cheers to your sobriety! (and anyone else as well) 🎉
@@seashellspeer It's nearly two months later and I'm still taking Morphine crazy pain I've to get cysts and puss removed and the dead parts of my pancreas removed scary stuff after suffering this pain there's no way I'll ever drink again imagine going through this again but worse no way I'm officially retired lol
I’m a musician (local and regional gigs, no heavy touring) and have been sober 4.5 years. Many friends, especially in the industry, weren’t ready to support my sobriety, and tried to sabotage it. I wrote a song about that to try to reconcile my anger about it.
Anyway, stellar work as always, Justin. Thank you for this.
4.5 years is awesome! Keep it going, Scott!
@@JamesMMcCann thanks, man!
19 years sober. If you’re struggling with alcoholism, google for help in your local area. There is help. The first day is hard and every day after it gets a tiny bit easier. You’re worth it, you’ll have a life that lifts you up instead of being dragged down daily. YOU AND YOUR LIFE ARE WORTH IT ❤
My Dad had 11 years sobriety before his passing.very proud of him.He used to say one day at a time.If you fall of the wagon,you pickyourself up and start again
Crying my heart out listening to this. The timing is unreal. Just lost my family, job and home because of my unacceptable alcohol abuse and depression. The self medicating part is 100 percent true.
My thoughts and love goes out to all of you out there who keep on struggling. Hang in there. Love from Sweden.
Accepting that it’s a problem is a huge first step. I wish you all the best success with your journey to a sober life.
Look for solutions. If you do change you'll find yourself healing the things you broke
Good luck in your turn around man. You can do it.. the pain you feel is hope for the future and the good and meaningful part that cares about others making itself known. Whether other people come back into your life or not.. you can come back and be a positive influence on others lives.
Du fixar det här! Jag vet hur det är. Jag var beroende av alkohol, heroin, amfetamin och Xanax (Xanor) i väldigt många år. För min del hjälpte det enormt att flytta från Sverige till Norge, men varje persons resa är annorlunda. Jag fick hjälp väldigt fort i Norge, i Sverige fick jag knappt någon hjälp. Men det varierar ju självklart också från person till person och speciellt vart i landet du bor. Börja med att ta tag i depressionen, så kommer det bli "lättare" att bryta alkoholismen _(påstår inte på något sätt att det kommer bli lätt, det hoppas jag kommer fram)._ Så gjorde jag. Jag hoppas det fungerar för dig också. Var inte rädd för att be om hjälp! Om du inte vill gå till Soc, sök upp närmaste AA eller NA. Du behöver inte säga någonting om du inte vill, utan bara lyssna och lär känna personer som är redan har klarat av att bli rena från alkohol och droger. Du behöver inte "köpa" hela grejen med AA eller NA, men bara det att ha en chans att möta folk som gått igenom liknande saker som en själv är magiskt. Jag går på möten när jag har panik och tror jag ska falla tillbaka, men jag ser mig inte som en AA eller NA "medlem", för jag har inte följt stegen direkt. Finn *ditt* sätt att göra det på. Det finns ingen manual för vad som är rätt och vad som är fel. Jag hejar på dig! Sänder dig enormt mycket kärlek från mig, en lite smått galen brud från Småland, som nu är clean i Oslo :)
Make a decision not to get fucked up today
As uncomfortable as you are sharing, Justin, it’s generous and helpful to others.
I’d feel uncomfortable speaking to the girl, not sure who she is. As she seems a little judgemental and serious without having lived that life, just saying so sorry if it offends 😜
@@Skaterbunshe's his producer, they've been doing these for some time. The impression I get is of friends and colleagues who trust one another.
@@Skaterbunshe's his producer. He mentions this in the first 30 seconds.
feeling bad that he looks so disgusted with himself. he hasn"t drank for yonks'. He's Won!!!!
I lost my husband in April 2022 to his alcohol addiction and mental health issues. My girls lost their dad and I miss him everyday but we just couldn’t compete with his overwhelming need for alcohol.
My condolences may he RIP 🙏
Your girls miss nothing, I was brought up by a alcoholic father.
@@hardlines2635this is quite insensitive. You might be projecting your experiences onto someone else. (I’m sorry for what you experienced). Sorry for your loss Jennifer, sending love and light to the family
@hardlines2635 how dare you question someone else's grief.
@@hardlines2635 Not everyone is a violent or abusive drunk/addict you know. Some people can function semi normally, even when highly intoxicated, at least until their body can't hack the substance abuse any longer sadly... and not everyone who drinks is your father, so please stop taking out your anger on other people, especially someone who's obviously still grieving the loss of someone they clearly loved very much.
Over 7 months sober now and it’s been the best 7 months of my life. All my relationships have changed plus I’ve fallen in love and discovered playing guitar again. Couldn’t ask for more.
That's amazing, proud of you dude! Keep at it! I'm roughly 5-6 months clean after I destroyed the relationship I had with the love of my life. It's incredible how powerful love can be in regards to inspiring changes in someones life. I hope I fall in love again like yourself eventually :) -- but again, congrats!
Don't worry! This too shall pass! Sorry to sound cynical but life will catch up with you again and things are going to be shit.. what I'm trying to say is, I hope you're getting to a place where you don't drink, no matter what.. there are people out there that can help! Hope you're well buddy! Stay the course and you know what, it'll get even better than you can possibly imagine!!
Thanks fella! And yes, it will all change, having bipolar has taught me that change is the only thing to really rely on!! Plus our relationship is not a straightforward simple one. But for first time in my life I know I can support myself alone. I tended to always pick partners to ‘complete ‘ me…not so this time.
Alongside that, I’ll soon be having an assessment for autism which could well explain so much of my thinking/feeling and behaving over the years.
@@jonglass9052 Good for you bub! Sounds like you're on the right path. Remember, getting over addiction is easy because you only have to change one thing - everything. Finding out who you are, why you are, how you feel, what you like, what emotions are as well as learning new skills like setting boundaries is a trip. Hold on, it's gonna get wild!!
Jenny does so well coaxing Justin into feeling comfortable sharing. I really love her calm interview technique. Well done both. Great chat.
I find her mesmerizing indeed.
She seems to just suck the life out of each situation…
@@cd66061 Agreed... I find her uncomfortable to watch. The interview lacked structure and any well considered questions... Justin was great but we could have learned so much more.
Thanks for sharing Justin.
I was at a Darkness gig Tullamore, Ireland a few years back (I think just after "last of our kind" was released) I absolutely loved it, legitimately one of my favourite ever gigs.
But one thing from the gig always sticks with me. I knew at this point of your struggles with alcohol and that you you were sober, but at one point in the gig someone in the crowd hands you a pint of Guiness and you made it look like you were going to take a drink before giving it back. I remember my heart being in my mouth that I was about to witness you breaking the sobriety! It has always stuck with me that you must have really conquered it to be able to do things like that. Fair play to you!
480 days sober as of this morning,Sobriety is the greatest gift I’ve ever given myself,big respect Justin,by talking about your addiction it gets other people talking about it,doesn’t happen enough 👍
Congratulations! Every day is a success for you - be proud!
Amazing Rusty, be proud and keep it going.
I’ve been 10 months sober after 25 years of heavy drinking. I’ve also been a pro musician for over 20 years and I agree about the expectation of being a ‘ rockstar ‘.
However, I’ve nearly finished writing our 4th album completely straight and it’s enlightening to explore new uncharted areas without the cloud of booze. My personal and professional life has benefited so much that I have no intention of returning to the
‘ fog of grog ‘.
Good luck guys and gals out there- it’s a whole new world !
Dave ~ AustinGold
Yes, once you step out of the ‘fog’ you realise how much greater life can be.
Never seen an episode with Jenny before but the way she did this interview and asked questions in such a great way was amazing. It really opened up Justin and of it came such a great discussion.
I thought it was amazing hearing his ‘rant’, it felt like a very honest description of his struggles. I can only imagine that’s how people like amy winehouse felt as she went out of control.
With all due respect, all that I could think was when did Liam Gallagher get so boring?! I am just making a joke I do not mean it. I had mentioned that about Jenny that she had come across as quite boring during his other drug podcast, and everybody went crazy for me not being respectful. I would have to disagree 100%. I simply think that the regular podcast format is much more entertaining and engaging. Maybe she was a friend of Justin's? Not sure about her credentials to be able to host or interview a large podcast.
Kicking the physical dependency is typically not hard. The hard part is the mental dependency which requires you to face a whole host of issues and problems. Bravo to you Justin for facing the issues and working through them. Putting yourself forward and talking about your struggles is invaluable to others who wish to break the cycle of addiction.
The trick is distance, its just hard to get distance
Amen
if a had bars nearby i would be in trouble@@burtmanly5208
No. The physical dependency in alcoholism, unlike heroin or morphine, can actually be FATAL. You can quit that stuff "cold turkey", but not alcohol, that requires medical intervention.
@burtmanly5208 completely untrue and you can actually kill people saying that. All alcohol detox should be monitored by medical professionals and typically with adivant then librium. The hard part is all of it. Alcohol and benzos will kill you in detox. Go to the ER or a reputable medical detox.
Thanks for this. I'm 13 years without a drink. I retrained and now help parents who struggle with drugs and alcohol.
Kudos!!!!
Quit drinking 21 years ago last July and have the utmost respect for anyone navigating addiction. Sobriety isn't easy, but the alternative was much tougher. "Instead of giving up everything for one thing, I gave up one thing for everything". My sincere respect and kudos to you, Mr. Hawkins, and everyone finding their way to and through sobriety. For those struggling, there are so many great people out there ready to help. Sponsors, counselors, and so on. Stay strong.
Fair play Justin. Thanks for sharing. More of us have been there than we let on.
Quitting booze about 13 years ago was the best thing I’ve ever done. All my other drug issues were super easy to take care of after I quit my real issue which was booze.
@@jeffm3925 wow, if I could keep it a six a day I probably wouldnt have quit, lol. I was at 6 by about 2 pm. I’d keep going until about midnight or so, with shots of whiskey on the side. I was selling pot, so I wasnt really working. Plus the cocaine and pain killers after I got a good buzz going. I decided to quit after I had a son, but I didn’t really quit, I just drank less. Which kinda was the right move because I weaned off the booze a bit. When my son turned 4 I got an Xbox for him to play Minecraft, because his cousin had it and he loved it. I fell in love with a game called Fallout and couldn’t play when I was drinking and ended up liking the game more than going to the bar and getting loaded. After a couple months of being sober I started picking up more hobbies that I pushed to the side when I was drinking like going fishing, and playing guitar. After that it wasn’t even a challenge. Now, if I try to drink a beer it makes me want to vomit. The thought of being drunk isn’t appealing at all anymore. A couple years ago I went to visit my brother and when I got there we had a few beers, maybe six of them, the next day i was so hungover I couldn’t even leave the hotel room I had(it was Covid and his wife was super scared of it, my brother wasn’t worried at all, like me). The day after that I was still feeling shitty but I could move around at least. So to sum it up, I found a hobby I liked more than booze and drugs.
I found the same thing and around the same time frame. Well done to you!
exactly this
@@michaelmcdonald3275 you too, cheers!
🖐️My name is Mike and I’m an Alcoholic.
Thanks for sharing Justin. I’m 40 days sober today after drinking since I was 15. I’m 47 next month. I can say that since I took and embraced Step 1 in AA I haven’t looked back. I think I’m just bored of drinking every weekend and want to try something new. New being the best possible me I can be without the constraints of alcohol. I enjoy social activities much more now sober and no fear of blackouts or existential guilt the day after.
Living in Switzerland definitely helps. The people here know how to enjoy life and get out into nature and don’t rely on booze like we do in the UK.
I did take up smoking again, after 8 years. But that vice I will handle later. Drinking would probably kill me faster than tobacco.
For me, Vaping weened me off cigarettes and I think once the weather cools I’ll not be so keen to stand outside in the cold and light up a tab. That smell really clings in the Winter and my 11 yr old Daughter will complain even more. “Lead by example” ;)
Totally relate to your moving abroad. That’s what’s called a “Geographic Cure”. But life here in Switzerland is generally better. I do miss a good Indian or a Friday night fish and chips 😊
Obviously you’re a little less well known here, although very distinctive in your appearance.
Swiss people tend not to stick their nose in where it’s not wanted. Something us Brits are all too fond to do. So hopefully you’re not harangued here like you would be at home.
Look forward to seeing you in November at my Local venue in Münsingen. The Darkness never fail to bring a smile to my face and a skip to my step. Many’s a dark mood has been shattered by your work. You are all brilliant people. The CZcams channel is awesome too and gives a great insight into the industry. Thank you!
Good job, Mike. Hang in there. The last 40 days prove that you CAN do it.
Ne safe, bro!
I am aron, and I'm a heroinholic..or I'm aron and I'm a maruijaunholic.....no such things folks. As soon as you stop, your cured. It's not a disease. Grant you it's hard, but it's only cravings and associations. If it took you twenty years to cement a habit.....it will take you twenty years to undo the habit. This is the hard part. This separates the men from the boys. Good luck folks, journal: yoga: exercise. Determination and read. Read alot.
Currently about to start a program of rehabilitation from alcohol and drugs. I can’t afford rehab but the local council service have been superb. Through a series of catastrophic events I sank to the point of drinking a bottle a day and thought I was functioning fine. But slowly my world has been destroyed and I’m left with nothing. I was a man of humility, great job, great family… now all gone. I accept my responsibility and ownership of my decisions though. I just needed to escape the pain. But I’m finally setting out on the road less travelled. Scared stiff, withdrawal at this level is impossible so it will be day by day. I don’t know how to reach out or tell anyone because of the shame. It’s so hard. But thank you Justin. I’m determined to do it, some how. I won’t lose anything else to this disease despite how hard I know it’s going to be. Your inspiration is invaluable as are the comments.
Hey Nick. Hang in there, man. I know how terrifying and hard it is. I'm in the same boat. I cannot afford rehab either and am currently exploring options available to me locally. Withdrawal is incredibly scary and hard for me too. Please stay strong man. I hope to heaven that we can beat this and emerge out on the other side.
"This is Spinal Tap" is so accurate, people will attribute things to it that weren't in the movie. For example, last year (2022) my drummer got drunk and angrily quit the band, which had actually broken up seven years earlier (2015). I called it "the most Spinal Tap thing that never happened in Spinal Tap".
Ha ha
The girlfriends bit is hilariously true
It's wild that you posted this at a time I've been struggling worse than I ever have with alcoholism and I appreciate you so much for it.
Hey... how's it going? Are you getting any support to help you? I am an alcoholic and I'm sober now 2 years in January but i was so physically dependent on alcohol i couldn't do it cold Turkey i was having seizures and it was pure hell it was at a point that the doctors told me i had to keep drinking as it was too dangerous to stop unless i got professional help in the form of medication which i finally got and it worked immediately so my friend it can be done i got all the therapy i needed after and it worked... i don't know your situation but if you can get the help go for it 👍🏻
You can do this, I promise you. Everything will get better without booze in your life. Just don't be afraid to ask for help. There are people who want to help you, and as Craig Ferguson said, "They're easy to find, because they're quite near the front of the phone book."
Keep us updated with your journey, and remember you can do this!
@@Ant.Legacy6 2 years is awesome, keep it going! Be proud that you've come so far.
@@JamesMMcCann thank you man i appreciate it 👍🏻 the best thing about coming out the other side is after going through that hell you feel like nothing can hurt you and nobody can touch you... it is life changing and the appreciation you have for even the simplest of things is so refreshing 😊 once you get that help and get yourself out of that hole you'll have a new life 👍🏻
Praying for you!!!
Thank you for talking about this. I’m one year sober this week. My overall health is so much better than it was a year ago.
If you aren't addicted to a substance but feel you are struggling especially with relationships with others and yourself, try CoDA: coda.org/
These are CZcams gold. Well done you both ❤️👏
Justin, THANK YOU for your honesty about everything. I LOVE your music & your awesome voice! I ALWAYS HAVE. You're on on your way to the biggest comeback in the U.S. via your CZcams podcast. So sorry that America is SO far behind on what England has known for a decade. Finally as a longtime fan, I can tell the nonbelievers, "I TOLD YOU SO". The Darkness is a GREAT band. Hang in there & enjoy the much deserved success. JUSTIN HAWKINS RIDES AGAIN.....BRAVO👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻❤️❤❤❤
Great work Justin (and Jenny) - I'm an addiction doctor, in long-term recovery myself. It has always struck me how many of my patients are extraordinary, as are you - creative, intelligent, sensitive and caring. I'm going to share this with some of my patients and their families. In particular, the point about prioritizing your recovery and the discussion about doing whatever works.
The 12-step program absolutely works, but many (possibly most), people find success in other pathways, or with a mixture of approaches. There are essential things seems everyone needs to learn and embrace and with other parts, it just depends. But those who struggle the most, can't stay clean, facing death and absolutely desperate - a full embrace of the 12-step pathway is always a sure bet.
Justin Hawkins indeed does ride again - as do we all in recovery, on the other side of addiction.
2 alcohol-free years here. Similar independent path and just wanting better health. 52 years young musician, and being sober has helped in all facets of life, period. That said, I literally can not imagine doing so (or anything, really), under the public microscope. Ex-smoker too. 6 years running, but I do miss it every effing day. Still the returns from stopping are greater. Much sincere love to everyone going through whichever "stage" of these struggles. ❤
Justin, your honesty and unpretentiousness is invaluable in this world of celebrity obsession. You present yourself as a real human being with talent, humor, problems, recovery, compassion, and love. Thank you for your support. We are not alone. Drugs and alcohol don't discriminate-rich, poor, tall, short, all shades of skin color and ethnicity-fill in the blank is a helluva substance. It will eventually rob you/us/me of our light and ability to care for others and maintain relationships. The substance will always win. Get sober, kiddos. Kudos to all of us on the recovery road.
Thank you for trusting us fans with your story, Justin. Love and support to everyone in the comments too.
For me, almost 24 years ago, I decided that I was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I was also depressed, but once I put the plug in the jug I noticed that many of my mental illness issues calmed somewhat and were easily manageable with cognitive therapy and healthy living. Over 2 decades later, I no longer have the obsession to drink alcohol or use drugs. I do obsess about ice cream on occasion, but I don’t wake up on the cold bathroom floor after eating that, or wake up in one of those fancy hotels with the vertical blinds (jail😂). Life is good. For anyone out there wondering if it’s the right choice to quit, I tell you that it is and if I, a dumb drunk, could quit, anyone can. Love the video, Justin. Thank you for your story and your honesty. All love from Canada.
I have a friend who is currently struggling with drink, and completely in denial. They are about to lose everything they ever cared about, and seem to have given in. For me this is new, but I suspect it has been going on for many years (hidden in plain sight) It's really brave to talk about this, let alone to have thrashed away the immense gravity of this illness to a safe distance. You are an inspiration to anyone who watches this. Well done Justin x
Immense respect for you for doing this Justin. I know it was hard and uncomfortable, but you helped people you will never know in ways you will never know. And now that this is out there it will continue to help people forever.
We love you so much Justin . You are an inspiration,
a superb composer and one of the greatest musicians ever .
❤👩🏻🇬🇧
Jenny did a great job doing this interview. I thought she was a therapist until I read the description. Thank you both for being vulnerable and not being afraid to bring this important topic to light. Wish everyone struggling with addiction/self-medicating escape and peace
This is a crazy coincidence of an episode as I just celebrated exactly one year of sobriety today!
I have been a chef in the world of fine dining for two decades and, like the music industry, drugs and alcohol are everywhere. It finally took a night in jail and a warning from a doctor that my liver was showing early signs of alcoholic hepatitis for me to decide that enough was enough. Day by day for one year now and I have never felt better mentally and physically.
Congrats!!!
Scott, Congratulations, that's amazing work. Keep it going, buddy!
Mad respect for those taking their first steps towards recovery.
Mad respect for each step they take in recovery, too.
You just stop drink and live with your past .
There is no such thing as “RECOVERY”
That’s Hollywood movie script nonsense.
Good on you for being so candid Mr H ❤
I'd suffer severe anxiety and negativity for days every time I drank.
I stopped overnight 5 years ago, never looked back 👍
Justin, I will never judge you for who you were. I will only love you for who you are.
I love Jenny's 'not taking bullshit and still being respectful' energy
Do you like the feminist nose ring or whatever that's supposed to represent too?
@@mandatorymyocarditis sure
You don’t have to be an expert at something to be helpful I believe sharing your story so authentically can be an inspiration to many. Thank you for opening up, it’s so refreshing to have true and deep content on youtube. 🙏 For the smoking, I stopped when I understood how it was affecting my health, not the “it’s bad for you”, but truly understanding the mechanics of how nicotine was placing itself in receptors for calcium and hence stopping me from absorbing it and making my bones weaker and hence putting me at risk of breaking (literally) to pieces. I saw cigarettes and especially nicotine (hence not even vaping) as an intrusion and that did it!!! never smoked again, not even tempted. It’s been 5 years! Yay!
This planet is very difficult Justin, and my heart goes out to you and everyone else dealing with an addiction. I had alcoholism in my family and in myself until I turned fifty when I somehow managed to stop. I always had it in my head that I would not be an "old" drunk, and somehow I gained enough power from this idea to follow through. You did it my friend, and your story can only help anyone else willing to listen. We're all in this together, and I hope you can feel this spirit-hug from one struggling soul to another. We all came here to deal with many issues...and to heal. Bless your little cotton socks - All Will Be Wondrous Well...
Great video, it is tough to live sober but definitely worth it. I will hit 4 years sober at new year after loads of failed attempts to quit. Stay strong all.
This was an incredible chat! Thank-you both for allowing yourselves to be so vulnerable. Talking about your waking moments was a revelation for me. I have been struggling with that for a while now, and hearing you honestly discuss your innermost thoughts gave me some relief! Jenny May Fin, you are freakin’ hilariously candid, “I’ve got a strong sense of self besides being so incredibly alone.”❤ Keep on keeping on.
Good job spreading some light on addiction!! Addiction/mental health issues are a plague on society currently. I struggled with Opiate addiction for 20+ years. Finally got help and have been sober almost 7 years now. I don't understand why I survived after losing so many friends and family members to overdoses. I was lucky to seek help right before the Fentanyl came along, some of my friends and family were not so lucky. I feel like it is my duty to use what is left of my life helping others live sober lives. Stay sober and strong my friend!!! We will always be addicts, but we don't have to be addicted.
Thank you for talking about this. One of the people I love most in the world is a recovering alcoholic. Shame and guilt is something he talks about a lot, and it kills me to hear it, because he's a kind, lovely, decent human being.
I can't stress enough to anyone going through it - the people who love you don't give a shit what 'bad' things you've done, it all pales in comparison with the thought of losing you - and passing moral judgement on the illness of addiction makes no rational sense anyway.
The fact that you're willing to even try to fight to be sober is enough. You as a human are enough, and the world is a better, more interesting, more beautiful place with you healthy and still in it. ❤
3 years sober off the drink, my daughter being born gave me the strength to stop. Proud of you Justin and Jenny and all of you out there! stay strong. for the record Jenny you are certainly lovable! As a fellow lonely person and single father, I have realized that people like me don't have "People" we ARE the people that people have. as mental as that sounds. being alone is 100% OK, i choose my Daughter and my self love over anything else! OH... and my guitars! lets not forget the guitars! take care!
I've been fortunate to never have had to deal with addiction but I know how important it is for people who have gone through it to share their experiences with others who have experienced similar situations. I admire your willingness to share. I guarantee you that this video will help many. Well done and congratulations on your sobriety.
I lost the love of my life two weeks ago at age 29. She was self medicating as a result of her past traumas that eventually turned into an addiction. She never got help for either despite me trying desperately to convince her that she needed to. If you are suffering please, for you and for your loved ones, get the help that you need. Nobody should have to witness or endure what I was witness to during the final agonizing two weeks of her life.
I am so sorry. Peace to you.
@@joemama-hk9mw Why is this funny?
@@tamcon72just an old fashioned troll. Hopefully he'll experience something tragic soon.
@@tamcon72ignore it, just attention seeking wa💩ker
@@tamcon72 Cause his loss
I’m 9 year sober. Best life decision ever. 👍🏻👍🏻
Agreed!!
Justin's rant was absolutely epic. Good on you - can't imagine how horrible it must be to be hounded by the challenges in your life constantly. Thanks for sharing this - you're incredible for having 17 years sober 😊
Thank you for being willing to talk about this, even though it makes you uncomfortable. You never know when someone might find this when they need it most.
Thank you both for discussing such a difficult topic. ❤
Justin I admire you so much for your bravery and honesty
Justin, you're amazing both for being awake to your alcohol problem and having the will to deal with it, and for sharing your experiences so openly for anyone else going through similar issues. Huge respect to you.
Thank you!!
Strawberry.....he's only after your attention and your money.
@@twowheels833don’t be a runt. With a capital C
@@twowheels833and you’re only after a reaction to your toxicity. Have a nice day!
@@twowheels833 he must be the only one
Great job, I spent 21 years drunk, now I'm 5 years 8 months sober.
I feel so strong in body and mind.
Thanks for this video.
22 years for me and I still have times of struggle.
After 30 years of constant/consistent alcoholism, I finally gave up drinking at the beginning of January 2013, just 2 weeks before the birth of my first and only child - my daughter, Sophie. A new & never-before known reality took over my life during the couple weeks prior to my daughter being born and i knew and was determined that alcohol, for me, had to go away and not come back. I could manage when it was only my life that was affected because with being a professional musician, alcohol was always a part of my daily job and it was accepted (to a certain point) by all of those I was surrounded by and involved with but I really woke up when I realized there was no way I was going to continue and ruin my baby daughter's childhood by drinking and being drunk all of the time. I stopped performing and playing in bands because the association between those things and alcohol seemed impossible to break. The alcohol part, for me, was fairly easy to stop because I was no longer playing publicly and I've never once missed drinking or been tempted to drink alcohol since. What I do miss, and still to this day struggle with, is quitting music. I miss it terribly and it fucks with me every day but I still am not sure that I could go and do that again without drinking so i am still choosing to avoid it. My little girl's birth woke me up and most likely saved my life and I'm grateful for that & so thankful for her. Maybe someday, I'll feel confident and strong enough to go out and play shows again and completely avoid alcohol but I can't say for sure. It's been almost 11 years since I've performed in front of people and a lot has changed during that period of time. One big change is my health and constant back pain so it might happen - it might not but one thing for sure is it will never be the same as it once was. I sure do miss it.
I was never really a fan of yours before CZcams but I love your kind and positive view of the world. I think we all have our health conditions or weaknesses. I think being a good human being is most important and you rock that Justin
I concur, with exception to using the word human. Cheers.
I've been sober a little over 7 and 1/2 years, for the first few years I was very closed off and shied away from talking about it. But over the past few years I'm so much more open and honest about it, I'll speak with anyone who'll listen about sobriety and I've found the more and more open and honest I've become, the easier it's become to deal with it and to move through it.
It's very brave and very inspirational to open up about it and I absolutely commend you for it
7 1/2 years sober for me! Congratulations and thank you, Justin!🤘🏻
You can see how much this really hurts you so fair play for speaking out about something which causes/caused you that much grief. Such a candid account of your experience with alcohol and other serious matters , combined with your musical knowledge and humour are the reasons this channel stands out so much compared to lots of the tripe you see on CZcams. Fair play to you Justin- keep the content coming dude.
She’s good at asking difficult questions and keeping on pressing when he tries to squirm his way out.
I can't begin to tell you how glad I am to have found your channel. You're a superstar Justin, and not just because you're a successful musician but as a human being.
I grew up in the Vodka-belt... half my extended family are alcoholics, many of them died from it. With or without rock, it's a problem.
Justin I want you to know the first time I heard of you or the darkness was a random feed on CZcams with the beer bottle video (barbarian) I was moved to tears by that video and how you handled the situation so professionally. You called out the person's mistake\choice and made it clear how it affected you and the crowd. And you told everyone how you had made the choice to get and stay sober and how that situation could derail everything you had worked for. You acted peacefully and rationally in such a dangerous moment when it really mattered. It actually drew out people's empathy in a way that bitching and whining would never have done.
Then I learned what a badass singer, songwriter, and bandleader you are. My God Justin I haven't heard such great vocals in a very very long time.
Since then I have been watching your channel and seeing exactly how talented of a musician you are. I'm usually blown away, if I'm honest, by your command of the guitar, the way you work out parts to videos you are watching...by your ability to comment on the industry and where things are headed. We are all just so blessed to have you Justin.
The tough part about fighting addiction for me was that I had to change my whole life…where I would go, with whom I would hang out, cutting ppl out of my life who were connected to my life with addiction and couldn‘t stay in my life if I wanted to be sober…it wasn‘t just fighting my inner demons but fighting the outer temptation brought in by others. It’s so hard to overcome routines…(drugs and smoking in my case)… I didn’t know what to do with my hands honestly…it’s weird, but the most simple things like drinking a coffee, reading a book were connected to sitting down and smoking a cigarette for example…all my habits had to change. It was a long road, however now I can sit down, meditate, work out and never feel the urge of needing sth to fix my restlessness…it’s that inner calm/peace that not being addicted to sth means to me. I truly wish this for everyone. I’m not talking about the physical impact, we all know how our body can sabotage us…it’s the mind though, that will screw us over and over again. Don’t give up!
Thanks for opening up. I always find this subject fascinating as I have flirted with the idea of going completely sober for some time now. Open and honest, much appreciated.
For any personal battling alcohol, or any substance, please find help. If you have a loved one struggling, don't procrastinate. Reach out. I recently lost my son. Alcohol played a part. It's devastating.
I'm sorry to read this.
I just wanted to say you are an excellent performer, singer and musician and that's why I come to see you and watch this. I think you will help a lot of people talking about this subject not just artists. Thank you for being so open.
With his approach to his platform, talks like this can do so much good for others. Press doesn't see this angle as being as lucrative. Can just sense the freedom Justin feels now in being able to have a discussion and not fight a narrative someone wants that can profit them.
27yrs dry for me. I sending all my positive energy your way. Keep strong and remember, you’re not alone.
That's fantastic, props to you
Thanks, Justin, for the effort in this episode. Your discomfort was quite noticeable... I hope it raises awareness and may help people struggling with addiction❤️👍
After ten years of sobriety I wanted to quit smoking, and a friend suggested hypnosis--amazingly, it worked. I've now been 33 years sober, and haven't smoked. But I need people in recovery to stay sober. I admire you taking your own path, but I couldn't do it on my own--too much shit beneath drinking (and drugs) that I had to clean up. It's very good that you spoke about this. Many suffer out there alone. I got inspiration from Elton John, who got sober about the same time.
Justin, I hope you read this. This was a fantastic conversation with Jenny whose personality is so different from yours makes for a wonderful conversation with you. What I would say is that you have done an incredible job in recovery but I see you throughout this conversation being very uncomfortable with addressing where you were. There is no need to feel that way. You made it. You did it. The person you are today is an incredible success, and it's ok to make peace with your past. I wish you lots of peace in reconciling the past and the present. Look at where you were and take huge pride at how you left it behind.
Thanks for opening up and kudos to Jenny for relentlessly waiting for you to do so
4 years sober.
Didn't ask
@@TheDwarburton i did, thanks
congrats very much proud of you
Congratulations mate!
@TheDwarburton Fighting demons yourself? Why would you act like that otherwise? Congrats on your 4 years, stay strong!
Acknowledging you for your courage and authenticity Justin, addiction is a difficult topic and your candor is truly appreciated. 💜
Thanks! After 19 months on 'non-inebriation' I just relapsed at the end of July.. I'm not regretting it, and I've not allowed myself to get drunk yet... But at 53, I realize alcohol is always going to be a part of my life AS an alcoholic, since I'll never not be one. Thanx for being candid and sharing this one, Justin. It's never easy to pour it all out there... as I speak from experience, because the more honest we are about our disease, the more it seems to terrify those we're being honest with. Stay strong bub, great episode. -Swiney
Thanks Tim!
@@JustinHawkinsRidesAgain you betcha!
I really enjoy and appreciate the dialogue that you and Jen have. She's a great partner and it's clear that you guys trust each other in a way the few colleagues (and friends) do
I hope people here who are struggling can get help. Love that this podcast has encouraged many. I really struggle to be in the company of anyone drunk (due to personal circumstances) and have to leave. It really scares me. Well done to those who are trying to move away from alcohol.
Thank you Justin for a candid show - Thanks Jenny also.
I've just turned 7 years clean from drugs and alcohol. Best thing I've ever done. Now I help others get clean.
Even being a local musician, drug use and alcohol is so pervasive and encouraged. After finally staying sober (almost two years) I'm thankful for famous musicians voicing their sobriety and especially the straight-edge hardcore community
Kinda weird, but justin. Your channel has been synonymous with my rock bottom and my recovery. I'm approaching my 6 months and since I dropped the booze and heavy coke use, your jingle for each episode sends shivers down my spine, in a bittersweet sense. It reminds me of the nights Id be up on a bender and end up sleeping for 15 mins before work only to repeat the process again and again.
And now that I'm, aside from weed, It reminds me that I can overcome some pretty dark shit, but that I must stay strong and not let temptation get to me. I'm a musician, and been at it since I was 14, 34 now and there's those times. But we must stay on the path. Anyway, thank you for touching base on this subject, I know it wasnt easy, but it is very much appreciated. Keep it coming!
I love getting caught in the rain while running! Looking forward to this one. Jenny is always great.
The unflinching honesty is rare. I really hope you maintain your health, Justin, and can keep making great music for decades to come.
Thanks for being so candid and honest about this issue. Alcoholism has affected my life in so many ways, and it's something we all too often sweep under the rug.
Taking control of your own media and own story is excellent. Thank you Justin (and Jason 😊). Jenny May is a thoughtful and good interviewer.
12 years sober without AA. Was a blackout drinker from age 14 to 42. Also a ton of other stuff I should not have consumed. Now doing Yoga and reiki everyday, never looking back.
The thing to remember Justin is that people watch this channel because they are glad that you did survive, and enjoy the fact that you are thriving again. I for one do not give a fuck about anything you may have done, I only enjoy the present you. In my experience drug and drink abuse is symptomatic of a deeper unhappiness within a person that usually predates the consumption. I hope you find happiness, being sober will help.
Justin, I met you in 2015 at a show meet and greet in Denver, Co. I told you that you were the inspiration for me to get clean. I am still clean all these years later.