It might not that related, so my baby son is only 1 yrs old by now but my husband already mentioning a 2nd child. he felt sorry for our son if he become an only child. Here I'm still struggling with taking care our son as a sahm, then I returned the question to him, what about me? I'm overwhelmed here with only 1 freakin child, do you not care what I feel? When we have kids, us parents are expected to prioritize our kids at the expense of our needs, mom's needs? What kind of food is that?
I hope your husband shows care for your needs and wellbeing, and if he wants more children and you do not, you will find some solutions or a compromise. It's a difficult decision for every family. 🩷
Thank you so much for this information. I have 7 children. Lately I'm feeling soo overwhelmed, running with an empty cup. I need to take care of myself, declutter and reorganize my house. This video is incouraging me to keep going.
Wow, your words ring so true! That feeling of waiting for someone or something to tell you what to do...I never realised these unhelpful mindsets that I have, but now I can work on them! Thank you so much!!
Hard to find time for any kind of self care when you are working mom & gone for 10-11 hrs daily. I am passed out by the time put my little one to bed. anyone in similar situations?
It would be pretty much the same me, I'm a stay at home mom and you have no idea how I wish to be a working mom again, be with our kid 24/7 can be..draining. And as sahm I'm expected to stay up all night to take care our kid while my husband sleep on the other rooms so his sleep won't be disturbed because he needs to go to work. Like, yes I'm at home but I'm freakin work too taking care of our son, cleaning, cooking, repairing things, I can't even eat or take shower in peace. I use to be working, hell how I regret choosing to quit my job
i'm surprised there are no comments under your vids(?) thank you so much for your helpful videos. i don't hate parenting at all, but the tips here are helpful anyway for any new parent. sometimes it's good to hear the obvious
I never comment on anything but , thank you for this video....For a long time I felt so disconnected from my parenting and not enjoyinf it at all...but hearing all this really put everything in perspectivw and it was all correct..I have alot of trauma that I need to work on and I have always just wanted/needed someone to look after my...anyways Im going to look up that book, starting right now hehe Love from Sweden 🤗
Well, I'm officially the worst mom. I have an entire day off once a week, and help later in the evenings several times a week. I even have a night time nanny so I can get sleep. I'm a stay at home mom and don't have to work. My husband is successful and we don't worry about finances. I hate being a mom. I wish I never did this. I hate myself for putting this onto an innocent child. I'm stuck with this stupid decision for my entire life. The baby is perfect. I just can't handle myself and my hatred, frustration, exasperation, sadness, and anxiety. There's no way out and I'm "living the dream" so many women wish they had. Go ahead and play a tiny violin for me. I'd have been better off as a crazy single cat lady. I hate who I am so much.
It sounds like there are deep, unresolved, core wounds. Have you worked with a therapist? I am a stay at home mom, who hasn't had a day to myself in almost 4 years. I do not have any help, support, except some financial from ex, who was diagnosed with Aspergers after our child was born. Our child was born 3 months early, and I also had an older child at that time at home (who is now an adult). I have to cook all 3 meals from scratch, due to many health concerns, intolerances. I have time to make myself one meal a day, and shower maybe once a week. I'm exhausted. The part I can relate to is the regret, and not wanting to be a parent anymore. Wishing I'd never become one. I love my kids and have poured in time/energy, on unbelievable levels. I had to quit my job as a nurse because of my second child. I'm so isolated. Due to the pandemic, and that child almost dying of the flu in 2018, we can't go do anything. I've been working on my own inner stuff, and have an online therapist. I do yoga and meditation when I can. I hope you can address some of the underlying beliefs, wounds, so that you can show up and connect to your child. I was given up for adoption at age 2, and then in 5 foster homes, for one year, the adopted at age 3. That's probably why I give, give, give, and bend over backwards. I want to say I showed up, that I gave, and that my children felt loved. I'm so drained though. I hope you can find the love and peace within you 💫
Wanted to add...self hatred (as you wrote in your last sentence), is a huge part of the equation. Can you bear witness and be compassionate to that part of you? Sitting with all aspects of yourself, without judgement...but instead honest curiosity? Self hatred, and shame, cause us a lot of suffering, and causes us to act in ways that hurt others too. I wish for you deep love, acceptance, and an ability to hold space for new possibilities in your life, showing up in new ways 💛
Hi Avital, thank you so much for this valuable video! I learned a lot. A remark about “ addressing key behaviors”: some children have mental disorders, which makes this a bit harder, right? What are your thoughts? Best regards, Sousan
Consider outsourcing more childcare to your partner, parents and parents in law, siblings, cousins, friends, neighbours or a nanny throughout the most difficult stages. You can't pour from an empty cup. 🩷
"this is too much, I don't know what I'm doing, omg someone save me!!! " lol... Current feeling.
"What about me?" Feeling is real for me
It might not that related, so my baby son is only 1 yrs old by now but my husband already mentioning a 2nd child. he felt sorry for our son if he become an only child. Here I'm still struggling with taking care our son as a sahm, then I returned the question to him, what about me? I'm overwhelmed here with only 1 freakin child, do you not care what I feel?
When we have kids, us parents are expected to prioritize our kids at the expense of our needs, mom's needs? What kind of food is that?
I hope your husband shows care for your needs and wellbeing, and if he wants more children and you do not, you will find some solutions or a compromise. It's a difficult decision for every family. 🩷
Thank you so much for this information. I have 7 children. Lately I'm feeling soo overwhelmed, running with an empty cup. I need to take care of myself, declutter and reorganize my house. This video is incouraging me to keep going.
Wow, your words ring so true! That feeling of waiting for someone or something to tell you what to do...I never realised these unhelpful mindsets that I have, but now I can work on them! Thank you so much!!
This video was so encouraging and helpful. I'm getting a lot of great info from your channel and so glad I ran across it. Subscribed!!
Hard to find time for any kind of self care when you are working mom & gone for 10-11 hrs daily. I am passed out by the time put my little one to bed. anyone in similar situations?
It would be pretty much the same me, I'm a stay at home mom and you have no idea how I wish to be a working mom again, be with our kid 24/7 can be..draining. And as sahm I'm expected to stay up all night to take care our kid while my husband sleep on the other rooms so his sleep won't be disturbed because he needs to go to work. Like, yes I'm at home but I'm freakin work too taking care of our son, cleaning, cooking, repairing things, I can't even eat or take shower in peace. I use to be working, hell how I regret choosing to quit my job
Ha ha! I love the video of the family picture session at the end. Anyway, good thoughts as always. Thanks for the wisdom.
i'm surprised there are no comments under your vids(?) thank you so much for your helpful videos. i don't hate parenting at all, but the tips here are helpful anyway for any new parent. sometimes it's good to hear the obvious
I know right? It's weird.
I'm so glad I found your channel
I never comment on anything but , thank you for this video....For a long time I felt so disconnected from my parenting and not enjoyinf it at all...but hearing all this really put everything in perspectivw and it was all correct..I have alot of trauma that I need to work on and I have always just wanted/needed someone to look after my...anyways Im going to look up that book, starting right now hehe
Love from Sweden 🤗
This video is a revelation for me. Thank you.
Well, I'm officially the worst mom. I have an entire day off once a week, and help later in the evenings several times a week. I even have a night time nanny so I can get sleep. I'm a stay at home mom and don't have to work. My husband is successful and we don't worry about finances. I hate being a mom. I wish I never did this. I hate myself for putting this onto an innocent child. I'm stuck with this stupid decision for my entire life. The baby is perfect. I just can't handle myself and my hatred, frustration, exasperation, sadness, and anxiety. There's no way out and I'm "living the dream" so many women wish they had. Go ahead and play a tiny violin for me. I'd have been better off as a crazy single cat lady. I hate who I am so much.
It sounds like there are deep, unresolved, core wounds. Have you worked with a therapist?
I am a stay at home mom, who hasn't had a day to myself in almost 4 years. I do not have any help, support, except some financial from ex, who was diagnosed with Aspergers after our child was born.
Our child was born 3 months early, and I also had an older child at that time at home (who is now an adult).
I have to cook all 3 meals from scratch, due to many health concerns, intolerances. I have time to make myself one meal a day, and shower maybe once a week. I'm exhausted.
The part I can relate to is the regret, and not wanting to be a parent anymore. Wishing I'd never become one. I love my kids and have poured in time/energy, on unbelievable levels.
I had to quit my job as a nurse because of my second child. I'm so isolated. Due to the pandemic, and that child almost dying of the flu in 2018, we can't go do anything.
I've been working on my own inner stuff, and have an online therapist. I do yoga and meditation when I can.
I hope you can address some of the underlying beliefs, wounds, so that you can show up and connect to your child.
I was given up for adoption at age 2, and then in 5 foster homes, for one year, the adopted at age 3.
That's probably why I give, give, give, and bend over backwards. I want to say I showed up, that I gave, and that my children felt loved.
I'm so drained though.
I hope you can find the love and peace within you 💫
Wanted to add...self hatred (as you wrote in your last sentence), is a huge part of the equation.
Can you bear witness and be compassionate to that part of you? Sitting with all aspects of yourself, without judgement...but instead honest curiosity?
Self hatred, and shame, cause us a lot of suffering, and causes us to act in ways that hurt others too.
I wish for you deep love, acceptance, and an ability to hold space for new possibilities in your life, showing up in new ways 💛
I’m happily childfree. I don’t need the stress y’all talking bout. I prefer to sip on my cocktails while traveling and sleeping in every day.
Enjoy! 😊 Not sure what you're doing watching and commenting on this video though 😅
I absolutely love this thank you so much!
Thank u for including the photo shoot, wow, I feel seen.
Same!
Hi Avital, thank you so much for this valuable video! I learned a lot.
A remark about “ addressing key behaviors”: some children have mental disorders, which makes this a bit harder, right? What are your thoughts?
Best regards,
Sousan
What if you don't like babies and just need your own time and space everyday, for hours, and you're an insomniac.
Consider outsourcing more childcare to your partner, parents and parents in law, siblings, cousins, friends, neighbours or a nanny throughout the most difficult stages. You can't pour from an empty cup. 🩷