THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM | Evolution
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- čas přidán 16. 10. 2018
- I HAVE EVOLVED FAR BEYOND YOUR PETTY HUMAN NEEDS!!
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Horror Outro ► / haunted
Happy Outro ► / minimusicman-crazy-la-... - Hry
I tried to make a human. They just snapped their necks and used them as grappling hooks and evolved from there...
Just like a normal human
Me as a human...
Just like I do
As one does
@@firestorm6576 Wait-
I love how he says "i dont think spiders lay eggs" and then 1 year later... a spider lays eggs in his vr headset before recording fnaf vr
God made him learn the hard way
'scuse me w h a t
*VR, AR was special delivery
escuse me what the fuck
Thanks. I hate it.
In this episode, Mark forgets that creatures move best when they have *knees*
Who needs knees when you have the friends you made along the way?
@@MintyMan_ Mark's creations
@@mitoroskokoros589 life’s creations
He's god. So he created us with this game
Today on markiplier, we learned that spiders shoot babies from that privates like a shotgun
Ironically he made chica into a massive meaty spring that was perfect for tumbling down the stairs
This made me laugh so hard
I'd never thought I'd hear a sex lesson of spiders explained so wrong and so vivid
XD
Lol, I love it. It was the best (oddest) sex ed class ive ever had XD
You mean it was right and cool
lil kev You mean his A$$ is correct
What?
If Mark was god, we all would be equally blessed and terrified for our lives. *Especially when he says he has an idea.*
oh god
Oh god
OH GOD
*OH GOD*
*OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH GGGGGGGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDD*
*mark has a idea*
Soooooo the same as religion now.
HE IS GOD
@@mrsmarlowe if mark was leader and he said he had an idea: I'm leaving planet earth
he mde pretty succesfull ´humans´ tho
At 17:00 they're literally learning how to exploit a glitch in the game for their own purposes. That's pretty sick when you think about it, they're escaping the matrix
“It’s Dark Chica.”
Looks like Dark forgot to feed her again. Gotta set up a feeding schedule, dude!
"CHICA MAAAAD"
She stock still
"This is a family friendly channel!"
"Guys it's Cocktober"
*Yes.*
*Proceeds to give spider sex-ed class*
I mean it *IS* right after No Nut November.
I was the 666th like now it really is cocktober
@@teresakelley4057 well I was the 667th like
"Wait I got an idea"
The last words you want to hear Mark say
Endilia I know, when I heard him say that I was just like “Mark, No, Please, You’re Gonna Kill Us, DON’T DO IT!!!”
I saw him say that as I read your comment. XD
Ikr
Mark’s equivalent to “Hold my beer”
ok
6:42 that what a good bowl of Mac and cheese sounds like
**good ending**
4:30 He actually looks like a father just watching his kids with a beer, "Where did you go?" 😆
I was thinking that through the entire video lmfao
Cigarette mums
"Oh he's doing leg raises-" **Flings out of existence** "Where did you go?"
I love that part.
4:30 so i can remember this
I Read This Exactly As It Happened And Made It Even More Funny.
Darkiplier:Come here girl
Dark chica: *has glitchy seizure on the ground*
Dark’s just watching his dog Spaz out
Darktail: (silently watching through a window that was for some reason placed near a mirror) =)
I don’t know why I laughed so hard at this
666 like oh dear
hmmm...
I have a name for dark chica!
Glitcha!
26:10 "Father, I crave cheddar"
Yes
*Father, I crave c h e e s e*
G
I
V
E
C
H
E
E
S
E
Father, I want to C O N S U M E C H E E S E
Damn I forgot about that image
Shadow; IM THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM
Kars: NO. IM THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM
???: amateurs
Kars and Shadow: WHAT WAS THAT, PUNK?!
Markiplier: *A M A T U R S*
IS THAT A JOJO REFERENCE?
Was that the bite of 87??
amaturs
NO WAY!!!!!!!! IS THAT A MOTHER FUCKING JOJO REFERENCE? JOJO IS THE BEST FUCKING ANIME! JOSUKE IS SO BADASS! ORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORAORA ORA MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO YO ANGELO OH YOU’RE APPROACHING ME BUT IT WAS ME DIO
@@nonamegaming5298 🚪 here’s the door. Now leave
“This is a FAMILY friendly channel” Goes to talk about sex standing up,
since when this become a family friendly channel ;D
@Joshua Pryor And how spider sex "works"
this is how you make a family, okay?
and how the mama and papa spider going at it xD
Well thats how you make a family in the first place isnt it? So nothing truly is innocent
Mark: ...I'm not crazy! Everyone knows this. Everyone knows..."
*Mean while*
The spiders: *synchronized seizure*
The giant enemy spider
Huh
SEIZURE FUCK LETS GO
xD
AKA Muffet from undertale
What if you left open a tab with this running for years and then you come back to the tab and find that they have become so efficient at running that they are moving at light-speed
The Ultimate Life-from uses all the capabilities of the others. But this needs more power. We need a super Aja.
Hello
“Spiders give birth like a shotgun blast into the nearest face.”
-Mark Fischbach 2018
Tom Costa Education from Markiplier is the best.
I think that's what he meant when he said "Bizarre versions of porn"
That’s Mark’s name?
Aiden D mark edward fischbach
Svenger Mc. Spazzy yeah it's a i tire classification of subspecies terhes multiple of them
I like how he just sits back in his chair all comfy-like, sipping on his drink as he watches his hellish children learn to evolve
That's Mark for ya
4:30
This sounds like he’s actually in a irl place talking to people
When he was trying to get them to climb I imagined 100’s of dogs just falling down stairs
How my biology teacher tells me how life evolves: **breakdancing seizure dog**
Where do I find this game?
@@za0n282 I don't know
@@za0n282 check desc lol
@@za0n282 oh it’s called evolution and is a mobile game but for com0ut4r I wouldn’t know
@@mattiescott1615 the video description? I have looked there, and I cant seem to find it.
"I like being stable dad."
I've never been so disturbed by a seemingly innocuous phrase in my whole life
read as Stable Dad at first
"This is a family friendly channel!"
About ten minutes later: *proceeds to explain the birds and the bees but in spider form*
The fact that Mark made the damn
*sound effect*
It was something I didn’t know would exist, and I didn’t need, and had the same horrific effect and experience as Furry Squad
"I'm the Ultimate Lifeform."
No wonder why Kars eventually stopped thinking.
It looks like daddy long legs
bro
Have you seen my turtle?
I thought Shadow was the Ultimate Lifeform
Ah yes
@@eidolomere aren't YOU the turtle?
"I'm pretty sure when a daddy spider- a *d a d d y s p i d e r* -"
F A T H E R A R A C H N I D
@@Microwave2410 A N I M A L O F T H E A R A C N I D F A M I L L Y W I T H A F A T H E R L Y R O L E
@Fnafronpa and The tattletail craft daddy long legs is in the huntsman family
@@elanrg and? Cellar spiders are a part of the Arachnida class. Theyre technically not fully spiders, but theyre arachnids
@@zer0rebel4 by that logic so are Scorpions
mark: THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM.
me: is that a JOJO REFERENCE?!!??!!!?!!!?
Mark: “it’s best to make things as simply as possible”
Also mark: try’s to create a human
Small youtubers: "says a single bad word"
CZcams: Demonatized and age restricted.
Markiplier: "talks about sex and penises and vagina's"
CZcams: You're all good bro 👍
Who do you think gets yt more ad money
PewDiePie: says heck
*D E M O N I T I Z E D*
@@catchamp1880 exactly.... Jack also seems to have the same luxury as Mark though.....
Actually the game grumps did something interesting. Dan said fuck almost asap on a episode and Arin said "You can't swear in the first 10 seconds of a video! Your gonna get us demonatized" or something to that extent.
Mark is being educational.
“Chica and her ill-begotten spawn” is probably the best phrase I’ve ever heard
marks speech on cocktober is the funniest thing ever
*Eventually,*
*Mark Has Stopped Thinking*
I tried making a cat.
I broke the game.
Cats are apparently perfect lifeforms.
therefore, Kars = cat
You right
Shaggy is the perfect lifeform to be correct...
@@5AMUR-41 You've ruined the joke.
@@Crazy-qi1gw, good
Life form: *is triangle*
Mark: “this is LIFE!”
noice = yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup
_Illuminati confirmed_
ITS AN *A*
25:54 Mark makes MusicMan
5:54 the best of the last generation 🤣🤣
11:20 I just see a bunch of graceful backflipping cows
graceful
Yep, it is the most beautiful sight ever.
I see a bunch of cows having their necks snapped over and over as they are tumbling down
@@sodagaming8676 still graceful :P
Well they can jump too
"It's like just watching your children just flop around in a yard"
Hang on, I don't think that's how you do it but ok
that's totally what happens, my children love doing it after staring at RGB strobe lights!
My kid has gills and they do the same
There’s nothing wrong with a nice yard flopping every now and again
I wanna like but I can't, I'm sorry
seizures are funny unless you have had one Which i have
Mark describing how baby spiders are made is god damn hilarious.
This is by far the most explicit Markiplier video I have watched.
Mark may not drink alcohol any more but he does a damn good impression of being drunk.
Lol
IKR
Mark's drunk on life.
the truth makes me cant stop laughing
Oh I forgot he can't drink. I legitimately thought he had a beer in his hand the entire time.
“This is a Family friendly channel”
Proceeds to tell how the spider life cycle works
the real one doesnt get any better...
Fun Fact: spiders feel pain and their skeletons are on the outside of their bodies...
@@messyalien5164 yes that's called an exoskeleton
@@smirkfanta5535 yeah, thanks for telling me something that I just explained. They are also vulnerable to predators when they shed there exoskeleton until it hardens
But thanks for saying that. forgot to say what it was called
very correctly
“Forever go away”
Ad: *sup*
27:10 attack on titan theme drowns out all else.
I searched for this comment
what would you do if you were walking in a forest, and a random "A" shaped monster started aggressively break dancing towards you?
Wickermind probs help it or something.
Probably Run like that A monster
Date it
Video footage
run
Mark: "I have an idea!"
Me: oh no
My mom: oh no
World: oh no
Koolaid man: OH YEA- I MEAN OH NO
That one friend : Yass
god:HELL NAH!
Darth Vader: Nooooooooooo
Joseph Joestar: OH NOOO
Did no one notice at 15:43 that there was a dog that launched itself into the stratosphere as fast as light?
Didn't know that lol
Chica relationship with mark reminds me of the dog relationship with her dad from Fullmetal Alchemist
Edit: I am not talking about the real life Chica
the memories you just brought back are killing me
Markiplier creates life.
Life: wHy hAvE yOu FoRsAkEn Me MaStEr
*Mark*: *creates life*
Life: *exists in perpetual agony*
*Mark*: *drinks Monster*
@@Phoebe5448 iM dRiNkInG a MoNsTeR rIgHt NoW
Markiplier Makes: Ded peepos
WHHHHOOOAAAAA!!! SPOOPY@@hamlunchable
WhY yOu TaLk LiKe GaMzEe MaKaRa
“The Ultimate Life form.”
**Angry Kars noises**
Hazzah a man of culture
HOLY SHIT IS THAT A FUCKING JOJO REFERENCE??
Ayayayay
Jojo fans always find each other.
Classic Animations **AVALON PLAYS**
The true ultimate life form consists of four joints, two bones, and a muscle (the key is to not connect the two bones with one joint).
Prepare to watch those bizarre creatures fly like no tomorrow.
"Wait, I got an idea"
*final words before disaster*
“They’re fcking. Come on guys this is a *family channel.”*
You um, you sure, Mark?
Mark: "This is a family channel"
*Literally a few minutes later*
Mark: "The daddy spider's penis gets erect-"
Gallifreyan_Hunter: (memes)
me: C H I N A
not really, moving away from "family" content.
Deep space waifu was the most family friendly one so far
About 69% sure it's family friendly.
14:43
Mark's Creation: Shimmies across ground
Mark: Intense Joy and laughter
‘It’s like putting your kids outside for a while, watching them flop around until they learn to walk’ yup that’s exactly how i taught my 3 kids to walk lol
12:35
Man, this new zodiac sign is kinda dope.
2018：Mark: I don't think spiders lay eggs.
2019:Mark:There's a spider laying eggs in my vr headset!!
I breed spiders I can confirm they lay eggs XD
Growth!
character development
Burn the headset i have arachnophobia
Jerry Cook nu
AKA the episode where markiplier throws his dog down the stairs a few hundred times till the poor pooch resorts to dark magic
lmfao
*DARK POOCHIE*
Fergal Harkin the dark Chicka origin story
I would watch that
It's 3 am and I am looking at a grown man laughing at a thing that looks like a bridge with muscles trying to run.
The look of pure joy that turned into disgust in the blink of an eye when he noticed what the human like creatures were doing on the floor
You've created the best and most terrifying thing known to man
a dog with a 12 foot vertical leap
high jump master
Son... That's *not* a dog...
Total, is that you?
I can relate to Chica freezing under pressure on a spiritual level.
I froze once. When a girl was spinning a 1 metre rusty metal pole like a batton and let go. It flew at me like a javelin. Hit me directly on the right eye socket. I could have been half blind if it weren't for the pure luck of the direct hit
Same
@@InsomniacStephens141 OH DAMN I'M GLAD U OK HOMIE.
(Also who the heck just chucks poles at people wtf?)
@@kat-kalamity it was an accident at a playgroup when I was much younger, but if you imagine the hollow inside of the pole, it hit me so my eye was within the hollow part. Luckiest I could have been
Fun Fact:the reason the creatures walk so weird is that the AI controlling them doesn't know what walking looks like,so it just goes with whatever works.
Dog 1: how do we get down the stairs?
Dog 2: hmm.....I have an idea 11:12
When a mommy Dracula and a daddy Dracula love eachother very much, they do the monster mash.
And oh my, it was a very good bash
It went on in a flash.
Oh, It was a mash
God dammnit...
In a year or so, I will start a Twitch channel, with the same name as this profile, streaming games until I have enough money to get a GOP to go air soft bids on youtube.
this is an exact recreation of what god did when he was creating us
LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL CREATURES
Are you telling me Markiplier is god? If so I'm totally on board
@@hiddendraco2607 what does that make Bob, Wade, and Shaun?
@@Engieman909 arch angles
@@danghd2 nonono ANGLES not angels
Markiplier: this is a family friendly channel
Also Mark: *explains how babies are made*
“Baby spiders in your face!”
*fnaf vr flashbacks*
Why does everyone put muscles inside of triangles?
*TRIANGLES CAN’T BEND*
Brendan rigggggghhhhhtttt
then why don't you split the triangle 3 joint into more joint
They can if you try hard enough
and then jojo characters
that's where you're wrong kiddo
Don't feel the bad for the dog in the climbing part. That's not Chica, that's CH-1C-α, a robot design after her. She doesn't feel pain and is always happy.
At least, those who she let's live think that.
What was that last sentence?
user of username it was a warning ⚠️ DÆRK ÇHÏKÆ ÏŠ ÇØMÏÑG
I'm sure she and X Æ A-12 would be good friends if they met
@@dominique2911 yeah they definitely would
the typo at the end where you added an apostrophe to "lets" is so bothersome.
it's those tiny little mistakes that bother me the most.
I just imagine this how he talks to some kids. He just watches kids on a trampoline with a beer in hand. One of the kids shoots into the air and he's just like "WHERE DID YOU GO?!"
All of the rest of them: *Shimmy's Forward*
That one: BACKFLIP!
That. Is *not.* how spiders work.
Wait no.
*You are exactly right.*
*loads SPAS-12*
*tries to aim at Poison Zombie*
*_IT'S A FUCKING SPIDER WAIT NO_*
*baby spiders come out of shotgun and cover the poison zombie*
nice
motato_potato ART/GAMES I agree
HOLY CRAP, HOW DID *I* GEY SO MANY LIKES-OFF OF A SPIDER COMMENT NO LESS?!?!
*i feel blessed*
Mark says "this is supposed to be a child friendly stream" he then discloses how he believes spiders mate vividly. What
wholesome content :)
Daddy long legs have penises which technically would make them different than other spiders. Which might make them not a spider
Most female spiders eat the male to reproduce. Eat their entire body.
Also he discusses how the streamer are "sick f***s" for wanting a hamster to f**k an elephant 😂
That's because he's full of shit.
Dont forget cocktober
I was expecting to see a man with arm blades and wings use a life energy
Now I'm just imagining zombies looking like this with a Markiplier face causing an apocalypse and repeatedly say Hello Everybody My Name Is Markiplier menacingly
Mark at 5:24 "this is a family friendly channel" Mark at 18:58 explaining how sex works
Wtf
Ture
Woah woah woah, this is a family channel guys we don’t use the word “sex”
@@someinternetperson its not have u watch his other vidoes
ikrXD
19:04
That moment when Mark starts talking about mommy and daddy spider and your mom walks in
yep
he legit sounds like a child who just figured out how the whole thing works XD
@@stardust7129 fam if you've heard children talking about stuff like that, I feel bad for you
2:10 eugenics 101
"eventually, he stopped thinking."
I could tell from the thumbnail this was going to be either:
A, The fall and rebirth of Markiplier into an ultra powerful crab god!
B, a funny let's play
Or C, A severely stupid game
Looks like all 3 were right
a game that progressively grows smarter = stupid
gottem
I wonder how confused Chica was hearing her name so many times
Brooke Rozelle she’s usually not with him but sometimes lays by him while he plays
Alonso's Passion she’s all knowing
Pretty sure she can hear him, she's a DOG.
Well dogs have better hearing than humans
mark: chica, what are you doing
chica: he has gone crazy again
The “arachnid” one just proves the observation of carcinization (the phenomenon where non-crabs will eventually become crabs)
Mark: creating the ultimate life form
_meanwhile in the space of the jojo universe_
Kars: am i a joke to you?
*sees the beginning of the game*
Me: Oh that’s so cool!
*sees final form*
Me: Oh GOD that is horrifying…
"Im pretty sure spiders give live birth"
*egg sack intensifies*
AS SOON AS I SAW THE TITLE I WAS LIKE "SHADOW?????!"
Goddam what a nightmare material your description of spider reproduction was.
Sooo... right when he tells his “children” that he hates them and wants them to forever go away, I got a Johnson & Johnson baby ad.😂
Squarespace ad.
ironic
The#1 Sonder that is amazing my dude
The#1 Sonder also I got Verizon
@@SinisterF. uBlock origins
What’s this? Markiplier is evolving!
_Oh wait no, he was just stretching._
Daniel Sambar lol
XD lol
Lol
Nice pic...😂😂😂
Daniel Sambar your picture looks like the picture CallMeCarson has so niCe
MARK BECAME KARS FROM BATTLE TENDENCY
"Well, that's not walking, that's flopping on your ass!"
- Markiplier, and probably also someone being hyper-critical of a baby
Eventually, mark stopped thinking.
THANK YOU FOR THE JOJO REFERENCE
Toki wa tamari
YES A JOJO REFERENCE
What's new
I planned all this from the very start, Kars!
“Family friendly”
*_DADDY SPIDER INTENSIFIES_*
Cocktober
Mega dill pickle
Never seen so much dogs jump on their faces to go down some stairs
Watching Markimoo laugh his ass off about his dog falling down the stairs proves we are living in the darkest timeline.