Breaking the Cycle: My Journey with Internalized Misogyny | Riya Kumar | TEDxYouth@CPS
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- čas přidán 8. 09. 2024
- Riya Kumar, a student at College Prep, explores the concept of internalized misogyny, particularly within the South Asian community. Written from the perspective of a girl growing up in the Desi community, it gives insight on how much subliminal messages matter- and just how much they can affect our thoughts and actions. Riya Kumar, a student at College Prep, explores the concept of internalized misogyny, particularly within the South Asian community. Written from the perspective of a girl growing up in the Desi community, it gives insight on how much subliminal messages matter- and just how much they can affect our thoughts and actions. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
Watching this after experiencing my daily dose of sexism. Thank you for bringing this to light.
Take it as a compliment that he had no recourse but to mock you. It's a sign that you bested him in spades when he didn't think you were any threat at all. That is an ultimate victory.
I'm pretty stubborn and outspoken when I'm feeling that fire to stand up to injustices or mistreatment. My family used to joke that's because I'm a redhead and apparently that's the stereotype for female redheads? We're seen as loud and "boysterus". I was told women like me all end up as devorced old crones and lonely because we can't keep our mouths shut. And if someday my spouse decided to leave me because I maybe get annoying when I stand my ground with a quick tounge and debate furiously, then so be it. I'll be happy living a full life as myself and that's the best feeling ever! I don't need his or anyone else's approval to see my own worth.
i can't imagine a real man having a problem You having an opinion and defending it. Quite the opposite in fact. Most males are "doers" who are at their happiest when a strong Woman is making him work for Her happiness. Women are too kind.
@@josholdaker8684 it's taken a lot of self development to reach this point and I'm continually learning still. I was raised to be silent, meek and mild and to always obey or fear punishment. The stereotype of hedheads being loud and opinionated was always followed up with how they never wanted me to be like that. Just be sweet always and obey the man above us women (my family are extremely religious and believe women are a man's property and follow very strict patriarchal family rules). So yes, they want someone who is easy to control who will never put up a fight so they can always get their way. And so them saying that "you'll end up alone" was really meant to be a threat to keep me docile and in line.
I don't see it as a threat anymore and on the contrary, I think learning how to defend myself has allowed better communication with my spouse and we're able to discuss things better, which I actually think is a good thing. So yes I agree with you for a healthy man who isn't a toxic control freak that's sounds about right!
Men don't define women and women don't define men. She's correct.
Amazing delivery, great message. The world needs to discuss these topics more, and women should be aware of their patterns
my whole childhood i was bullied and lots of it was aimed at me being a girl. ity dont seem liek much but it caused me to never really accept myself again. when you get told that you'll never go anywhere just bcause your a girl, every day of your life from the age of 6, you'll belive it.
Words still resounding even after nine months. Very proud of you
stunning and spectacular! she only speaks facts and i'm so proud of her
SHE IS SO GOOD I LOVE HER
I am seeing this after experiencing constant sexism. Thank you so much
Fabulous Riya!! ❤️❤️
Wow. This is powerful. Thank you for calling this out.
I have never felt more seen
Great talk and so important 💛
Well stated!
I LOVE HER SM
Love this
riya my rockstar
Lots of love ,,,darling 😘
such an icon
THE BEST TED TALK EVER SHES AMAZING :D
Sign up for the draft
Thank you Riya, this is horrible to realize is the underlying structure in all of society. I am hereby a recluse, Sweden is instilled in sexism.
YAY nice job!
yo is that mikey
cousin!!!
While I agree the topics she spoke on do need to be talked about, you ought to be very careful projecting your morals onto others in absolute. While the world sorts men and women differently, we truly are different and live different lives. Some of the generalities might be toxic or bad, but some if not most of them exist for inherently good and real reasons that is naive to ignore. Life experience will give you understanding on all of this, which is the crutch to be young and passionate about topics that require experience.
You do realise that the so called differences are more nuanced than your naive take? In fact most men's differences are much more closely alligned to women than other men and vice versa. And we live different lives not due to these differences (atleast to some extent) but rather how our society is structured.
Yes the differences do not mean some people deserve less freedom
What are you on about? Nothing she talked about is rooted in good. Sexism is objectively bad, insanely harmful and irrational.
Women are not worth less than men, they're not biologically destined to be housewives or whatever, they're not accessories to men, they're not weak, and they're not more emotional than men or any other common argument. (The biological difference is very small. Women do have fluctuating hormones, but men do, too. It's just that men are sadly taught unhealthy coping mechanisms like bottling up your feelings/not expressing them or getting angry and punching walls. Anger is an emotion, but it's also a secondary emotion, to whatever caused the anger, such as embarrassment, grief, disappointment, etc)
Both women and men can think in the "hierarchy pyramid" or the "we're all equal" teamwork thing. Far from all women have the latter as a default mindset.
Many women are logically intelligent, many men are emotionally intelligent. Men may have some biological advantages like physical strength, but women can also be sporty and athletic, even naturally. Not all men are strong.
Just trying to figure out which one could possibly be some aquired-with-age wisdom.
Oop that was long, sorry
If a woman tells a man that his outfit looks good, he will wear that outfit as often as possible. he is then dressing for the female gaze. This is desire to be loved, not internalized misandry is it?
I understand what you’re getting at, but as a woman it’s a little different than what you’re thinking. It’s not the fact that we don’t want men to look at us. I love to dress up and compliments are great! It’s that we feel the need to look perfect all the time, whereas if a man goes out of the house in a hoodie and sweats every once in a while that is seen as okay. We feel the need to dress up perfect all the time, with makeup, hair, and outfit, even if we don’t feel like it, because of they way we are raised and how people treat us. Hopefully this makes more sense for you. Have a great day!
Holy cow I don’t think you missed any opportunity to turn any exchange with men into a gender battle.
Aka "I don't see the sexism that still very much exists and can be noticed in everyday life"
Just want to throw in here that almost all fashion designer are men.
true. they create the clothes that they shame us for wearing.
gays*
@@sixtyninefromsixtonine gays are men too...
@@sixtyninefromsixtoninegay men are men
First
I don't think that's what he meant when he said "god help her husband." you're reading more into it than I believe he meant. Husbands and wives argue all the time, its universal. I believe he meant that your husband may be dominated by you because of your oratorial skill and therefore lose most of the arguments in which he engages. Anyone who loses most arguments in which they engage, man or woman, could probably use God's help.
You don't need a mask if you're alone on the scene
You do if you want to virtue signal...
Maybe she had to, maybe she felt safer hiding her face from mysogynists like you.
The simple fact that you felt the need to criticise the tiniest thing shows your mysogyny.
She might spit on the front row. Have you seen Hamilton? The king turned them into the splash zone xD
@@victoriaalbastra6325 So you are suggesting she is so brave and unspoken that she has to wear a mask to hide her face because she is afraid of criticism and being identified by some misogynists? That's pretty insulting lol Being overly sensitive to criticism is one of those negative traits typically attributed to women and you are attributing it to her
God help your husband…
OMG God help you
God help your wife
@@raech7663 thank you
Internalized misogyny isnt real
You are not real, bot
Yes it is. It's so very real.