Joey's Great Witcher Bake Off

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  • @erpa07
    @erpa07 Před 2 lety +2796

    When you realize Joey Batey is more chaotic than Jaskier ever could be.

  • @ivancerecer5758
    @ivancerecer5758 Před 4 lety +13204

    Jaskier trying to survive in modern day after Ciri accidently sent him to the future

  • @anavitoriafarion2621
    @anavitoriafarion2621 Před 3 lety +4037

    The fact he came, created the channel, made this video and then never ever came back, is the most chaotic thing about this

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +269

      Joey is a man of mystery and chaos. Pure pure chaos. And forgotten passwords.

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +14

      @@FaultAndDakranon 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @Queencrazy1997
      @Queencrazy1997 Před 2 lety +19

      Dude we need more

    • @Matesson
      @Matesson Před rokem +4

      You...are fogging right oO

    • @IdaSantti
      @IdaSantti Před rokem +14

      And he has almost 60 thousand followers. This is awesome and insane!

  • @gimmegimmegimmeaficaftermi2768

    Geralt: I'm back from the store- what the fuck did you do.
    Jaskier, sobbing while eating cake:
    Yennefer, filming: i'm putting this on youtube

    • @etanesnil7072
      @etanesnil7072 Před 2 lety +21

      yes

    • @sehanyabarnes255
      @sehanyabarnes255 Před 2 lety +123

      Geralt cleaning the kitchen like "Hmm.. Fxck."

    • @JozeManuLOL
      @JozeManuLOL Před 2 lety +34

      The Witcher:XXIst Century

    • @CainEverest
      @CainEverest Před 2 lety +77

      Ciri: Yeah, Lambert and Coen put him up to this.
      Geralt: Why didn't you stop him?
      Ciri: *points at Yennefer*

    • @-flowerbloom9305
      @-flowerbloom9305 Před 2 lety +8

      @@CainEverest fair enough 😂

  • @wolverineftw
    @wolverineftw Před 4 lety +11793

    Can we talk about how Joey Batey creates a CZcams account just to post this video

  • @scoresby3476
    @scoresby3476 Před 4 lety +11058

    Jaskier is doing a really good job of playing joey

  • @mayakth44
    @mayakth44 Před 3 lety +946

    i accidentally skipped forwards to him stirring with a cucumber yelling “WHY WONT YOU FUCKING DIE” and i’ve never been happier

  • @blythewheeler1218
    @blythewheeler1218 Před 3 lety +2073

    i'm starting a petition to get joey batey and henry cavill on the next season of 'The Great British Bake Off (Stand up to Cancer)'

  • @rachele546
    @rachele546 Před 4 lety +4930

    No one:
    Joey Batey, an intellectual: Meat is the opposite of cake

    • @wackiekebab6482
      @wackiekebab6482 Před 4 lety +39

      he's not wrong tho

    • @rachele546
      @rachele546 Před 4 lety +28

      WackieKebab exactly, and that's what makes him an intellectual

    • @AJRivers21
      @AJRivers21 Před 4 lety +27

      2020 is taking a toll on everybody

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 4 lety +6

      A piece of cake is the opposite of a grind of meat.. So pate is the opposite of cake.

    • @ShizaanSil
      @ShizaanSil Před 4 lety +4

      i read this comment at the EXACT time he said it

  • @woofawoof7616
    @woofawoof7616 Před 4 lety +5642

    Geralt, come fetch your bard. He's broken.

    • @lethellsing
      @lethellsing Před 3 lety +23

      Woof Awoof This just made my day, lol

    • @andreahardin7521
      @andreahardin7521 Před 3 lety +11

      HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @choochoopicklepie
      @choochoopicklepie Před 3 lety +10

      IM CRYINNG 😂😂😂

    • @samanthabruce1657
      @samanthabruce1657 Před 3 lety +8

      Lol
      You right!!!

    • @SophietheValiant
      @SophietheValiant Před 3 lety +6

      Well, didn't they had an argument

  • @chickpeasandeggs1486
    @chickpeasandeggs1486 Před 2 lety +818

    I'm just appreciating the image of a man covered in batter and flour, looking absolutely dishevelled panickingly buying a pre-made birthday cake at Tesco 😂😂

  • @ximenakokoro9899
    @ximenakokoro9899 Před 3 lety +842

    I don't know how Madeleine managed not to laugh at him the whole time. I bet she has a lot of practice with his craziness

  • @nyb3672
    @nyb3672 Před 3 lety +8082

    Gods, but I love this man. Jaskier isn't even a character, they just put Joey in a doublet and let him loose.

    • @taylorhammond3578
      @taylorhammond3578 Před 3 lety +378

      'Let him loose' as if he's a wild animal lmao 🤣🤣

    • @adama9300
      @adama9300 Před 3 lety +121

      He is of sorts...

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +145

      @@taylorhammond3578 Don't deny that our bard is feral ;)

    • @shreyaghosh4598
      @shreyaghosh4598 Před 3 lety +68

      Jaskier is Dandelion....its a polish word for buttercup but since the English translator felt 'buttercup' didn't suit the bard's character he changed the name to another yellow flower 'dandelion'.....which seemed to suit him better according to the translator....so yeah jaskier is a character
      Sorry for the info dump🙈

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +45

      @@shreyaghosh4598 Is this... are you making a joke that he's a wild plant not a wild animal?

  • @leeward7882
    @leeward7882 Před 4 lety +7549

    Joey: “a lot of people ask me, wow Joey, you’re so good at baking” That’s not a question Joey 😂

    • @yanderevenom9793
      @yanderevenom9793 Před 4 lety +82

      Lee Ward peak comedy 😂😂😂

    • @CaramelFae
      @CaramelFae Před 4 lety +45

      But the Dutch did it anyway

    • @racoon_in_ankhmorpork
      @racoon_in_ankhmorpork Před 4 lety +26

      I stopped the video immediately to comment the same exact thing and this is the first comment I found 😂💀

    • @nakseyyy
      @nakseyyy Před 3 lety +14

      the more i think about it the more i laugh

    • @MasterHall117
      @MasterHall117 Před 2 lety +5

      They ask him where the pie filling went

  • @butzmn7190
    @butzmn7190 Před 2 lety +714

    I followed this recipe. But I'm vegetarian so I swapped the meat for chickpeas. Worked out great though. The only real difference in the end was that my cake said "Merry Christmas"

    • @LR-dh9et
      @LR-dh9et Před 2 lety +38

      Oh wow, mine said "happy Easter" not sure what I did different. Though I think he added two eggs, I used three so that might be it.

    • @the_internet_has_ruined_me
      @the_internet_has_ruined_me Před 2 lety +1

      Nice profile pic

    • @sauce6746
      @sauce6746 Před rokem

      Ur gross

    • @Lark1610
      @Lark1610 Před rokem +12

      You can't have a full control over the letters on the cake. That's the magic part of baking.

    • @Zipperthewhipper
      @Zipperthewhipper Před 3 měsíci +1

      Damn mine said "sorry I slept with your sister" Idk how that happened probably bc I used off brand flour

  • @grimmaulkin_crafts
    @grimmaulkin_crafts Před 3 lety +774

    does this man literally just have a lute standing there? This man just radiates chaotic jaskier vibes.

    • @Salterisks
      @Salterisks Před 2 lety +100

      No bc one of the reasons he got cast as Jaskier was bc he was the only person they could find who owned and could play the lute

    • @wrigglesofcontradiction1879
      @wrigglesofcontradiction1879 Před 2 lety +43

      He's almost MORE Jaskier than Jaskier himself- or just all the Jaskier. Yes, just all the Jaskier.

    • @sauce6746
      @sauce6746 Před rokem +4

      Its his character what u expect

    • @claraf.6833
      @claraf.6833 Před rokem +23

      They saw him, casted him and just told him to stand there and be himself.

    • @therubyinthecorner346
      @therubyinthecorner346 Před rokem +8

      Yeah he plays the lute in real life too

  • @sincerelydhruv
    @sincerelydhruv Před 4 lety +4616

    So, this is what Jaskier has been doing after his break up with Geralt.
    Interesting..

  • @Valkire
    @Valkire Před 3 lety +4727

    Geralt: Builds his first gaming computer
    Jaskier: mental breakdown at baking a cake

    • @Shebeast3
      @Shebeast3 Před 2 lety +8

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @dustrider9306
      @dustrider9306 Před 2 lety +120

      To be fair, baking is way more complicated then building a stupid gaming pc.
      - an engineer

    • @maecawsynblasunneis7751
      @maecawsynblasunneis7751 Před 2 lety +36

      @@dustrider9306 maybe you should engineer something else if you think thats the case

    • @mylesfranco3545
      @mylesfranco3545 Před 2 lety +34

      @@dustrider9306 My guess is that you have not had great success in the cake baking arena?

    • @abilawaandamari8366
      @abilawaandamari8366 Před 2 lety +25

      @@dustrider9306 engineers don't make cake they built shit that made the cake for them

  • @lisawood1052
    @lisawood1052 Před 3 lety +566

    "Madeleine, we've got so many leaves" is definitely my favorite bit.

  • @vyersreaver1749
    @vyersreaver1749 Před 3 lety +225

    You know you're in some trouble when the SUGAR has gone bad.

    • @Rocky123698745
      @Rocky123698745 Před 2 lety +12

      I’m pretty sure it was salt

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +9

      Good thing he checked right after pouring that ungodly amount in that metal helmet 😂😂

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety

      @@Rocky123698745 yup that's the joke, congrats x))

  • @riverdalememes5248
    @riverdalememes5248 Před 4 lety +2146

    “I started making it... had a breakdown… bon appétit!"

  • @liquidwood4064
    @liquidwood4064 Před 4 lety +2299

    Joey: "The second most important incredient... is incredients."
    Me, taking notes:

    • @stingerjohnny9951
      @stingerjohnny9951 Před 4 lety +57

      TheLynx WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN!!!

    • @xJunos
      @xJunos Před 4 lety +2

      If he would've said "time" then...

    • @monkeycat6408
      @monkeycat6408 Před 4 lety +3

      Gaunter o'Dimm has entered the chat.

  • @SanguineHarp
    @SanguineHarp Před 3 lety +180

    I’m honestly just so concerned for Madeline’s cupboard door.

    • @jocemott
      @jocemott Před 2 lety +1

      same me, destroyed the kitchen

    • @BiBiren
      @BiBiren Před rokem +1

      I had that cupboard, trust me if you live in the humid countries, you dont want that there, the moist plus the termites just slowly decimated the wood

  • @jordinagel1184
    @jordinagel1184 Před rokem +97

    “Oh, the sugar’s gone bad”
    It’s actually impressive that he managed to do that

  • @jorgealcaniz3715
    @jorgealcaniz3715 Před 4 lety +2605

    Yen: Why are you friend with Jaskier he´s so melodramatic
    Geralt: Jaskier is not melodramatic!
    Jaskier:

    • @falka2398
      @falka2398 Před 4 lety +96

      sorry, but geralt would be the first one to call jaskier drama queen :DD

    • @falka2398
      @falka2398 Před 4 lety +61

      also, unrelated - relationship between geralt and jaskier is my favorite part of the show and i can't wait for more development in next seasons!

    • @Sunegami
      @Sunegami Před 4 lety +72

      Jaskier is not melodramatic
      He is feral

    • @corpsehandler5321
      @corpsehandler5321 Před 4 lety +24

      most bards are.

    • @typesomethinghere8300
      @typesomethinghere8300 Před 4 lety +4

      Falka 23 have you read the books or played witcher 3?

  • @ccRask
    @ccRask Před 4 lety +647

    Things I didn't know I needed in my life until now: Joey Batey screaming "COCK" 18 times

    • @sigridhorn2408
      @sigridhorn2408 Před 4 lety +15

      I can't believe you counted

    • @ccRask
      @ccRask Před 4 lety +13

      @@sigridhorn2408 I guesstimated for comedic effect but if you're telling me that *you* counted and my number is right I'm gonna yell

    • @sigridhorn2408
      @sigridhorn2408 Před 4 lety +11

      @@ccRask Nope. Sorry. He yells "FUCK" a lot, but only cock about four times

  • @bethneild108
    @bethneild108 Před 2 lety +188

    Ladies and gentlemen..... We need this man as our next Doctor!

    • @katg2192
      @katg2192 Před rokem +22

      Now obsessed with the idea that the Doctor is masquerading as Joey Batey who is pretending he isn't actually Jaskier.

    • @deinodinosuchus
      @deinodinosuchus Před rokem +15

      oh my gosh he would be FANTASTIC, that or as a companion if not the doctor

    • @carlinkag2525
      @carlinkag2525 Před rokem +8

      Fuck yes

    • @donlywoodward5565
      @donlywoodward5565 Před 10 měsíci +5

      YES he'd be so funny.

  • @RainWelsh
    @RainWelsh Před 3 lety +197

    Obviously this is all glorious, but for some reason the line “do we need BEEFS?!” just destroyed me.
    Also like a glimpse into my kitchen while cooking anything, though at least my final product tends to be a bit more edible. Other than the time I dumped an entire freshly-baked cheesecake on the floor and sat there sobbing while the dog ate it, so thanks for those flashbacks.

  • @centurion2040
    @centurion2040 Před 4 lety +3854

    Alternate title: Joey Batey is having a mental breakdown in his kitchen during the quarantine.
    Gold

    • @askimbeatrix8245
      @askimbeatrix8245 Před 3 lety +57

      Centurion better one: Jaskier trying to function without Geralt

    • @Shebeast3
      @Shebeast3 Před 2 lety

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @fudgeymoss
    @fudgeymoss Před 4 lety +1315

    joey and madeleine out here messing up their kitchen to cheer us all up

    • @marias5685
      @marias5685 Před 4 lety +35

      Molly Fuller bless them both

  • @yuko6794
    @yuko6794 Před rokem +46

    Joey just radiates so much chaos energy and you can't hate him because those round eyes forbid you to.

  • @VivaLaDnDLogs
    @VivaLaDnDLogs Před 2 lety +167

    Finally, a cooking show I can relate to.

  • @abilawaandamari8366
    @abilawaandamari8366 Před 4 lety +3106

    Expectation : Joey Batey making a decent cake
    Reality : *British Howtobasic*

  • @rita5433
    @rita5433 Před 4 lety +2952

    Alternative title: Joey Batey losing his mind for almost 7 minutes

  • @_Tomon
    @_Tomon Před 2 lety +47

    "So how do you want me to play Jaskier?"
    "Be yourself, just little more normal!" :-D

  • @theressmthinthestatic
    @theressmthinthestatic Před 3 lety +35

    The voice break on “happy day” broke me

  • @taylorhammond3578
    @taylorhammond3578 Před 4 lety +8404

    Alternate title: Jaskier trying to prove Geralt wrong about that bit about his filling-less pie

    • @uwu2579
      @uwu2579 Před 3 lety +374

      Geralt being forced to film it so he can get his djinny djin djin

    • @andreahardin7521
      @andreahardin7521 Před 3 lety +102

      WHY IS THIS HIDING IN THE REPLIES AND COMMENTS, IT SHOULD BE FRAMED AS ARTWORK

    • @Bluejsa1
      @Bluejsa1 Před 3 lety +27

      This 100% 😂😂

    • @Beregond1861
      @Beregond1861 Před 3 lety +57

      "YOU NEED A NAP!"😂

    • @littlenugget5346
      @littlenugget5346 Před 3 lety +16

      Ur speaking the words of a god rn.

  • @kellyschlagwein6262
    @kellyschlagwein6262 Před 4 lety +2069

    Henry is being a quarantaine housewife.. Joey is being the husband who wants to cook for his wife..

    • @rhondaarnesen6684
      @rhondaarnesen6684 Před 3 lety +2

      😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @annehelatrix4627
      @annehelatrix4627 Před 3 lety +2

      This comment

    • @aridoak6772
      @aridoak6772 Před 3 lety +1

      Is Joey married? If so send me the link to the website last time I check he wasn’t married

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +12

      @@aridoak6772 I believe he's still married to his work. But if he did get married, I'd expect to only get confirmation when an interviewer got really insistent about the new ring he's wearing.

  • @mactaylor3014
    @mactaylor3014 Před rokem +20

    Him at the end, absolutely defeated, and going "I don't even LIKE cake.😭"
    😂

  • @annahedvikavotrubova5072
    @annahedvikavotrubova5072 Před 3 lety +196

    Leaves...Madeline, we´ve got so many leaves...
    Can he just get an award or anything for this masterpiece?

  • @Theordoreqaz
    @Theordoreqaz Před 4 lety +899

    Joey, screaming: mADELEINE WHERES THE BAKING PAN
    Madeleine: *about a foot away from him behind the camera*

    • @user-bm5gf2pe7e
      @user-bm5gf2pe7e Před 3 lety +6

      When that’s your birth name and you have a mini freak out thinking that he’s talking to you through the screen 😂

  • @athousandcopperbeesinawiza5576

    *accidentally rips door off hinges*
    *throws entire egg into bowl*
    *tastes sugar, immediately swears*
    "Where does flour come from? It's probably potatoes, but where does flour come from?"
    *viciously stirs "batter" with wrapped cucumber*
    "WHY? WON'T? YOU? DIE?!!!"
    "Madeleine, where's the... ba...king....paaaaan?"
    *drinks straight from bottle*
    "I really hate cake"

    • @teresadondela5309
      @teresadondela5309 Před 4 lety +7

      @@paulacurtis1874 you must be fun at parties.

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 4 lety +51

      Sugar? That's salt. He's doesn't even identify it, he just says it's off. Brilliant.

    • @lucasmroczynski5543
      @lucasmroczynski5543 Před 4 lety +1

      thats not sugar thats salt, ive never seen sugar in a plastic bottle like that in the UK

  • @runningthemeta5570
    @runningthemeta5570 Před 2 lety +182

    There is no better way to spend the last two hours of 2021. Than watching Joey try and bake

  • @chrisi8373
    @chrisi8373 Před 2 lety +48

    I love that he had to cut after he dropped the book because he was about to start laughing.

  • @rontheron4807
    @rontheron4807 Před 4 lety +2663

    That bit of Joey aggressively chugging down a wine bottle while covered in cake dough and flour speaks to me on a spiritual level

    • @ls4692
      @ls4692 Před 4 lety +12

      It is me while I am cooking too.. so it is relatable af

    • @remplidefeux
      @remplidefeux Před 4 lety +10

      @@ls4692 Just while cooking? Its me at this very moment.

    • @Azzazz1n97
      @Azzazz1n97 Před 4 lety +10

      When in doubt pour one out😂😂

    • @Shebeast3
      @Shebeast3 Před 2 lety

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @tori6105
    @tori6105 Před 4 lety +3309

    henry : shows what he cooks / makes in quarantine and it all looks delicious
    Joey : t h i s

    • @literaIIyshy
      @literaIIyshy Před 4 lety +6

      Where does he show it?

    • @anigerozarroc8541
      @anigerozarroc8541 Před 4 lety +14

      @@literaIIyshy instagram

    • @stingerjohnny9951
      @stingerjohnny9951 Před 4 lety +160

      Tori so he’s a gamer, a hunk, has a jawline that could cut diamonds, loves fantasy, AND can cook?
      I’m pretty sure at least 40% of the guys on CZcams would go gay for him.

    • @parvathyk6120
      @parvathyk6120 Před 3 lety +39

      @@stingerjohnny9951 not to mention his smile that could cure Cancer

    • @stingerjohnny9951
      @stingerjohnny9951 Před 3 lety +41

      Kaboom Baby that’s the whole reason he chose the Witcher series and wanted to play Geralt, he played all the games before knowing the show was going on. He apparently almost lost a callback due to a WOW raid XD

  • @alicechapman2513
    @alicechapman2513 Před 3 lety +87

    this being my introduction to the witcher series is peak 2020 vibes

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +11

      Oh.. oh wow.also, Joey and Madeleine have a band called The Amazing Devil. You're in for a treat.

  • @ilovefrogs3141
    @ilovefrogs3141 Před 2 lety +61

    The 3rd season of "the Witcher" looks great!

  • @xlizziex
    @xlizziex Před 4 lety +2086

    Mostly impressed by how Madeleine didn’t die laughing filming that 😂

    • @valerobledo89
      @valerobledo89 Před 4 lety +101

      she's use to have joey around, so... i think he's always doind something like that (without the desaster around, of course)

    • @gingershit6994
      @gingershit6994 Před 4 lety +76

      I'm not saying we desperately need bts of this, but that's what I'm saying

    • @heart1114heart
      @heart1114heart Před 4 lety +11

      Cuz who's going to clean

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +4

      @@heart1114heart uhm him obviously? You trash your room and expect other ppl to clean it for ya? Don't be ridiculous.

    • @heart1114heart
      @heart1114heart Před 2 lety

      @sarrou Marbeu it was a joke 😑

  • @Maymer
    @Maymer Před 3 lety +3751

    Henry IRL:cooking pics with dad puns
    anya and freya: lightness itself
    Joey: exactly the same as Jaskier if Jaskier had access to TikTok and Taio Cruz's Dynamite

  • @_CallMeRex
    @_CallMeRex Před rokem +41

    The level of commitment. I’m pretty sure he recorded and produced a full cover of common people by pulp for the background of the cooking segment just for this masterpiece because I cannot find it anywhere. It’s so perfect.

  • @ash_is_well
    @ash_is_well Před 3 lety +107

    Whenever I feel like shit I just come back to this video and I can’t even explain it but it’s like everything just falls back for a few minutes and I actually feel just pure joy, joeys smile is contagious and I love this video with my whole heart

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety

      Oh hi, hard same. This video makes me feel good. Please tell me you know his band The Amazing Devil.

    • @ash_is_well
      @ash_is_well Před 3 lety +2

      @@FaultAndDakranon of course I know about the amazing devil! I’m a massive fan of Their music it’s beautiful put together

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety

      @@ash_is_well Oh yes. and their voices. My word.

  • @clarity_art
    @clarity_art Před 4 lety +2675

    Jaskier: How’s my singing?
    Geralt: it’s like ordering a pie and finding it has no filling
    Jaskier: offended
    Also Jaskier: can’t even bake a pie that has no filling

  • @syddomann3054
    @syddomann3054 Před 3 lety +1824

    Joey Batey 🤝 John Mulaney 🤝 Brian David Gilbert
    Exuding 'God has released me into the Wild and is hunting me for sport' energy

  • @kirajade7499
    @kirajade7499 Před 3 lety +36

    I've come back to watch this again because today, after spending 10 hours on a cake that had so many problems along the way that I considered simply ceasing to exist, my dog jumped on the counter and ate half of it. I tried it and it wasn't even a good cake. I feel these emotions now

  • @kale9912
    @kale9912 Před 2 lety +31

    I did not know what to expect going into this but omfg I have not laughed this hard in a while. I knew it was going to be good after "people always ask me, 'Joey, you're so good at baking.'"

  • @laurenguilmeyer5197
    @laurenguilmeyer5197 Před 3 lety +6790

    Can we just appreciate the fact that he destroyed his kitchen to bring us this masterpiece

    • @johanna_na
      @johanna_na Před 3 lety +13

      Appreciate? He made a huge mess, and wasted totally edible ingredients. I think that screams stupid.

    • @chunkylardex2284
      @chunkylardex2284 Před 3 lety +144

      Heidi Sherbet it’s called a joke heard of it

    • @johanna_na
      @johanna_na Před 3 lety +6

      @@chunkylardex2284 You think it is FUNNY that someone wastes edible food that goes straight into the bin?

    • @chunkylardex2284
      @chunkylardex2284 Před 3 lety +102

      Heidi Sherbet I think the video is funny also he wasted significantly less than he could’ve

    • @grim_56
      @grim_56 Před 3 lety +100

      Heidi Sherbet
      Go donate to a food bank if you’re so pressed

  • @zeeee8305
    @zeeee8305 Před 4 lety +2304

    Why this have such a weird "old CZcams" feeling even though this is an actor it so good.

    • @stingerjohnny9951
      @stingerjohnny9951 Před 4 lety +73

      Jojo Reference he’s an actor with a good sense of humor, that’s how XD

    • @wut727
      @wut727 Před 3 lety +8

      Bcuz he's an actor

    • @TheMadWrldEffct
      @TheMadWrldEffct Před 3 lety +80

      It’s like some weird hybrid between modern day and old-school CZcams. Like if a 2005-era youtuber was thrown into 2020, given a hurried half-ass explanation of all the news rules, and then told to film and edit a video in under 24 hours

    • @stingerjohnny9951
      @stingerjohnny9951 Před 3 lety +7

      TheMadWrldEffct that description could not have been better, and it’s hilarious 😂

    • @TheMadWrldEffct
      @TheMadWrldEffct Před 3 lety

      Stinger Johnny rhank you ^^

  • @JesseCuster
    @JesseCuster Před 3 lety +61

    Joey, you had me at "big fat metal helmet." You are one of the best parts of The Witcher. Keep on keeping on, dude.

  • @SpooksTheWitchh
    @SpooksTheWitchh Před rokem +5

    I'm starting to think he wasn't even hired to play a part. I think they just found him and said "you".

  • @leenakhanye
    @leenakhanye Před 3 lety +701

    when jaskier doesn’t get attention for 2 minutes

  • @hopeschulz1162
    @hopeschulz1162 Před 4 lety +724

    Are you, perhaps, short of a marble? 😂

    • @StuartLohe
      @StuartLohe Před 4 lety +22

      A marble?!?!?!? That would be a whole bag! 😂

  • @bobbyplayzgamez2346
    @bobbyplayzgamez2346 Před 3 lety +18

    He was like “imma post and leave”

  • @ashlingteirney7543
    @ashlingteirney7543 Před rokem +11

    I can't get over him doing the smolder look through the whole intro

  • @weirdbigfoot3130
    @weirdbigfoot3130 Před 4 lety +3883

    If this doesn’t explain the state of all us during this quarantine, I have no idea what does.

  • @KP-of5rj
    @KP-of5rj Před 4 lety +378

    Imagine that it's Witcher modern AU where Geralt and Jaskier are roomates and that's what Ciri recorded

  • @jamieohjamie
    @jamieohjamie Před 2 lety +10

    "A lot of people ask me 'Wow, Joey. You're so good at baking.'"

  • @robynconnormurphy645
    @robynconnormurphy645 Před 3 lety +12

    I love how Joey made a channel to post this video and then just disappeared

  • @DervlaJ
    @DervlaJ Před 4 lety +1334

    They don’t call him Joey Bakey for nothing

    • @igelmithut6320
      @igelmithut6320 Před 4 lety +17

      You are a madlad and I love it

    • @julkakorcz
      @julkakorcz Před 4 lety +10

      I spat on my laptop's screen after reading this

    • @silverbro13
      @silverbro13 Před 4 lety

      He is most certainly baked in this video so yes

    • @tchuribei5466
      @tchuribei5466 Před 4 lety +1

      Hacking Joey’s account to pin this comment rn

  • @lemon_macaroon_1777
    @lemon_macaroon_1777 Před 4 lety +340

    The screaming and all of the "OH COCK" has me dying

    • @lemon_macaroon_1777
      @lemon_macaroon_1777 Před 4 lety +5

      @@paulacurtis1874 okay? He's an actor of course he is.

    • @reckless_mistake6743
      @reckless_mistake6743 Před 4 lety +8

      @@paulacurtis1874 don't shit yourself, sun. I'm scrolling through comments and can't stop laughing at your pitiful hater whining. Ofc you can like or dislike who the fuck you want, but just for your information we all don't give a damn. So maybe instead of crying how much you don't agree with others just leave and watch something that you like and stop being so pathetic

    • @reckless_mistake6743
      @reckless_mistake6743 Před 4 lety +6

      @@paulacurtis1874 yes, but one time saying that you are "not impressed at all" would be enough. There's no need to lament how much you don't like him. We understood that for the first time. Do you think that people care about your "opinion"? All you said is just miserable and useless weeping

  • @Flazius
    @Flazius Před 2 lety +43

    I am such a fan of the mood that it is: creating a CZcams channel to show us this genius of a video.

  • @gingerx_xbread
    @gingerx_xbread Před rokem +10

    They could not have picked a more chaotic person to play Jaskier and I am here for it

  • @PattyBHana
    @PattyBHana Před 4 lety +1937

    So this is how Jaskier is coping after The Mountain™️

    • @tobito2013
      @tobito2013 Před 4 lety +150

      No. We don't speak about that. Mountain what? I don't know and you definitely don't as well.

    • @sagevi1975
      @sagevi1975 Před 4 lety +142

      We don’t talk about the mountain divorce

    • @lacountess
      @lacountess Před 4 lety +65

      The mountain never happened. It was all a bad dream.

    • @circusclown1503
      @circusclown1503 Před 4 lety +29

      What mountain do you speak of

    • @saintlybovine9665
      @saintlybovine9665 Před 4 lety +40

      There is no war in Ba Sing Se.

  • @22bizarre79
    @22bizarre79 Před 3 lety +382

    oh hi....
    you caught me...
    reading...
    *_LITERATURE_*

    • @zephyranthes6101
      @zephyranthes6101 Před 3 lety +11

      It was at that moment I knew this video would be gold and I was not disappointed

    • @jinafire4574
      @jinafire4574 Před 2 lety +6

      IT'S NOT EVEN LITERATURE. IT'S AN ALMANAC. I love this chaotic man

  • @beveragebrit
    @beveragebrit Před 8 měsíci +3

    Joey is just one accident after another and is perfect

  • @leila6735
    @leila6735 Před 3 lety +30

    The thing about this that makes me laugh the most is that he's literally so stressed and for what 😃

  • @adrianbik3366
    @adrianbik3366 Před 4 lety +1576

    "The first most important ingredient is *love* . The second most important ingredient is... well ingredients...*
    Joey Batey fans: *TAKE NOTES EVERYBODY, TAKE NOTES*

    • @andreahardin7521
      @andreahardin7521 Před 3 lety +9

      A - PROFESSOR, COULD YOU PLEASE LEND US SOME MORE PAPER PLEASE?!? *To the person next to them* : should we also tell them that people are laughing their minds out?

    • @flumpyofdoom
      @flumpyofdoom Před 3 lety +3

      ✍✍✍✍✍✍✍✍✍✍✍✍✍

  • @Asmodeus0303
    @Asmodeus0303 Před 3 lety +683

    Jaskier trying to learn how to live after his breakup with Geralt.

  • @cottagebitch
    @cottagebitch Před 2 lety +7

    This is like “How To Basic” Lite ver. ft. Joey Batey-

  • @ellelongacre3723
    @ellelongacre3723 Před 3 lety +6

    Alternative Titles:
    1. Man vs Kitchen, Kitchen Wins
    2. Man tries desperately to convince audience he can cook and fails terribly

  • @dappermancer
    @dappermancer Před 4 lety +1602

    "WHY. WON'T. YOU. DIE." He screamed, while stirring his batter with a wrapped cucumber

  • @starrose20
    @starrose20 Před 4 lety +852

    Joey reading The Witcher book is what he looks and acts like when he’s paid to behave. The Witcher Bake-Off is when he’s given a camera and told do what he wants with it and ends up channelling the his own Horror and the Wild album into it because the HORROR and it’s FUCKING COCK WILD!

    • @nunatosally1
      @nunatosally1 Před 4 lety +9

      Bless this comment

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 4 lety +30

      I know. You can tell he's done stand up. Every thing he says had a joke in it, mile a minute, and the editing! Masterpiece.

    • @robsealsey5052
      @robsealsey5052 Před 4 lety +1

      They should just give him context info from the books and let him improve being Dandelion, hed kill it.

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 4 lety +2

      @@robsealsey5052 please. Oh pretty please. Joeys Jaskier is so much less objectifying/rapey than the original.

  • @louierenault7344
    @louierenault7344 Před 2 lety +10

    that singular one banana in 1:27

  • @FaultAndDakranon
    @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +14

    If I say embarrassing things about how talented our blue eyes boy is, d'ya think he'll show back up just in time for us both to be mortified?

  • @maxkelly6967
    @maxkelly6967 Před 4 lety +484

    so basically the most important ingredient in baking is actually just swearing very loudly at your trashed kitchen until a miraculous tesco birthday cake appears, and isn't that just beautiful?

  • @Jared-yl7ql
    @Jared-yl7ql Před 4 lety +1466

    The pure chaotic energy in this, the fact that it looks like a swearing compilation, every single aspect of this I-

    • @andreahardin7521
      @andreahardin7521 Před 3 lety

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @andreahardin7521
      @andreahardin7521 Před 3 lety +1

      YOUR PROFILE PICTURE AND NAME IS PERRFFEECCTT TOO

    • @FaultAndDakranon
      @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety

      Perfection.

  • @MrSakata65
    @MrSakata65 Před 2 lety +31

    I love how Google just suggested this video again after all this time, definitely needed a good laugh. Joey, I'd be amazing if you did some sort of sequels to this 😁🙌

  • @Allanon86-
    @Allanon86- Před 2 lety +9

    Burn kitchen burn…

  • @adrianpallamar4244
    @adrianpallamar4244 Před 4 lety +763

    How he screams at the bowl with the cucumber in his hand, "Why won't you die!" has some beautiful Oblivion Npc Dialogue engery

  • @HuffleFluffy
    @HuffleFluffy Před 4 lety +4100

    my girlfriend and i tried baking a cake today and apparently joey's spirit possessed us because we SOMEHOW managed to melt our toaster
    happy day

    • @tabbycarter5637
      @tabbycarter5637 Před 3 lety +173

      I'm sorry how the fuck do you manage to melt a toaster?

    • @HuffleFluffy
      @HuffleFluffy Před 3 lety +215

      @@tabbycarter5637 context: our kitchen is very crammed and my mum places her metal coffee pot on the toaster because there is literally no space anywhere else
      i then took the bottle of oil which was behind the toaster bc we needed it for the cake, put it back, accidentally put it on the switch of the toaster (which you didn't see from where i was bc it was facing the wall and as i said, the space is crammed and tiny), badabing, badaboom, the pot heated up, melting the plastic of the toaster

    • @tabbycarter5637
      @tabbycarter5637 Před 3 lety +86

      @@HuffleFluffy haha, honestly i feel like thats kinda impressive 😂

    • @stingerjohnny9951
      @stingerjohnny9951 Před 3 lety +16

      teilzeitpunk that’s...amazing 🤣

    • @thescruffinator8830
      @thescruffinator8830 Před 3 lety +21

      Maybe don't use your fucking toaster to bake cakes.

  • @lovelaced
    @lovelaced Před 2 lety +9

    jaskier really is just joey being himself in a doublet isn’t he

  • @jarofbees8455
    @jarofbees8455 Před rokem +8

    It's been 2 years and this video is still my favorite thing ever

  • @dragonscales1080
    @dragonscales1080 Před 4 lety +696

    I hope to god Henry Cavill does his own version of this

  • @FaultAndDakranon
    @FaultAndDakranon Před 3 lety +474

    I love how Joey acts like he's never eaten food before, let alone made it.

    • @matchamelon330
      @matchamelon330 Před rokem +10

      “madeleine, we’ve got so many leaves”

  • @DerultimativeOzzy
    @DerultimativeOzzy Před 2 lety +3

    >Makes one classy youtube video
    >themes it after the Witcher show in which he is taking a part of.
    >uploads once
    >refuses to elaborate
    >leaves
    What a man.

  • @alenadzibuk
    @alenadzibuk Před rokem +3

    When you go to watch the Witcher because of Geralt and after a week of brainstorm find yourself here and listening The amazing devils.

  • @littlewermacht
    @littlewermacht Před 4 lety +753

    every other witcher bake off: one min top
    joey being extra: almost seven minutes

    • @princesscuddlefish
      @princesscuddlefish Před 4 lety +28

      The hero we needed

    • @olga6941
      @olga6941 Před 4 lety +1

      I would like it but it's at 666, so i won't ruin such a beautiful number :^

    • @mariaswonderland
      @mariaswonderland Před 4 lety +4

      theres MORE?!

    • @olga6941
      @olga6941 Před 4 lety

      @@mariaswonderland yup
      czcams.com/video/fBSGy_3MrrM/video.html

  • @elizabethzelaya6710
    @elizabethzelaya6710 Před 4 lety +899

    I knew this was gonna be a disaster the moment he said, “A lot of people ask me, wow Joey you’re really good at baking”

    • @quakywacky8048
      @quakywacky8048 Před 4 lety +42

      knew this was gonna be a disaster the moment he said, “Oh hi."

    • @userAsiral
      @userAsiral Před 4 lety +15

      I knew even before clicking on the video

    • @whereisevan
      @whereisevan Před 4 lety +9

      I somehow knew, as a child, long before any of this existed, that this would somehow come to pass.

    • @manuquin
      @manuquin Před 4 lety +1

      I knew.

    • @ryanbarry7670
      @ryanbarry7670 Před 4 lety +1

      reminds me of donald trump's presidency...

  • @sprinkles3-d160
    @sprinkles3-d160 Před 2 lety +4

    5:15
    Jaskier when Gerald leaves him at the top of the mountain

  • @puszujtowera
    @puszujtowera Před 3 lety +3

    Instructions unclear, my cake looked good instead.