The Long History of "You're Not Ugly, You're Just Poor" [RANT]
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 25. 10. 2021
- what do you think? đ
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I wish we could normalize aging, its sort of crazy how women in their early twenties are afraid of wrinkles. I'm totally guilty of that, not sure why
i saw someone on tiktok getting botox in her forehead. she was 22!! absolutely sad and scary that we have demonized normal and healthy aging. i'm so worried for teenagers who see that and are receiving the message that wrinkles are something to worry about and be ashamed of, especially at such a young age
@UCkR9hr-GpZ3Z6gIzqF2rsFA Wow, I'm 22 as well, and the idea of someone my age feeling like it's necessary to do that makes me a bit sad. I think instead of pressuring people to look ageless, we should tell them about moisturizing, sunscreen, and staying hydrated to preserve the health of their skin. I feel like that's the much better alternative!!
I saw an article titled â10 celebrities that aged poorly.â And they had bad plastic surgery. It wasnât aging poorly it was bad plastic surgery. Thatâs all.
I'm 24 and I have couple of gray hairs. And I mean a couple, maybe 10 hairs altogether yet I have had people tell me I should dye my hair, or at least pluck them out.
Why?
Seriously, why should I be upset about couple of, honestly rather pretty, silver hairs, not even strands, on my head?
I remember when I was in college my friend said that her flatmate was getting leg muscle fillers because she had already had her boobs and bum done and decided her legs were now not "curvy" enough. đ I couldn't imagine being that insecure at 19 let alone having the money.
I'd add that another level of toxicity here is not that these plastic surgery/edited beauty standards are totally unattainable for working class people - it's that cheap, unsafe, and at times deadly plastic surgeries are being aggressively advertised to working class people *alongside* these images of impossibly beautiful rich celebrities.
@@black_forest_ what even is labiaplasty?
I just learned yesterday that there are people doing injections of fillers ON THEMSELVES! Are people really that desperate that they resort to buy fillers from shady places och injecting them themselves? Absolutely insane, incredibly dangerous and stupid.
This!!!
@@black_forest_ Yet another way very very young people having unlimited access to random pornography online is unhealthy.
Also: I have seen medical photos of labia that honestly probably caused problems for the body they were attached to, because they were SO large. But surely that is rare.
(Editing here to add: I mean labia that hung six inches or more below the outer labia. I imagine that causing potential problems and discomfort, and don't at all blame that person if they would take advantage of the chance to improve it, in the way exceptionally large breasted women sometimes want a reduction because their spine is being badly affected)
The idea that typical labia need to be "perfected" becoming a common idea is crushing.
Also also: how weird and creepy is it that genital beauty ideals are both a thing,
And seemingly based around being pre- or barely pubescent (hairless, minimal labia)
@@black_forest_ Shaving your pubes being some kind of norm is something that also increases the likelihood of (people wanting/thinking they need) labiaplasty. If much of your vulva etc. is hidden by pubes, you don't notice the shape and size of your labia nearly as much.
At 70 something years old, Dolly Parton was told "Wow! You look like a million bucks!"
Her response: "Good! That's about what it costs!"
She is my queen đ
The Trinity is Dolly, Divine, and Tammy Faye
Health as self care may disguise as beauty because of the self care being unnatural or unhealthy by society yet our nature isn't nature and when natural you look a million bucks because that's how much it costs to be yourself.
I love that sheâs always been upfront about her plastic surgery.
@@katybeaumont Yes! She doesn't lie about it, like most do.
She often tells people "It takes a lot of money to look this cheap. "
I had said it to my friends a lot, I was raised in a "old fashioned, strict house hold". My mom didn't allow me to see "teenage" shows because she thought they would create body images not good for me, no social media. I am from Argentina but 3 of my grandparents are from Italy and one from Austria. They had always told me how my "doe eyes" were cute and how my "rosed" cheeks made me always look blushed (I have rosacea). University came, I moved along, 2016, I was 17. My classmate made me an Instagram for me to be in touch of "what is the Kardashians do"
... Everything went down hill, I didn't have mate tan skin, my cheeks were always blushed, my eyes weren't lifted, sharp and almond enough. I was too fat in my legs but not in my ass, etc etc.
Suffered severe ED. My grandmother couldn't believe it, she was desperate because she couldn't understand why would I feel ugly. I told her that I wanted to look like "her" show her a picture and HAHAHA oh boy she put the most "wtf" face and said with her Spanish mixed with Italian "you want to look like an alien? Those people aren't real, I have never seen a person look like that"
Mind changing.
tu abuela es la mejor!!! đđđ»
I really hope that youâre doing well now â€â€
@@Lilypad-mt5hc thank you! I am đ but social media is scary hahaha I'm happier without them. I hope you're doing great too âșïž
I hate the karshitians and i hate this comment too
Know you are beautiful and you also have the best family!
Oh yes, cats are just so naturally beautiful. No Photoshop, no operations,not fillers. Just fluff and sass and naps.
truly divine creatures
I was literally thinking about cats and why they're so beautiful yesterday. I think it's the combination of heavily upturned eyes and fur that makes them beautiful. Skin is generally more ugly than fur bc imperfections are more noticeable, but fur would look absolutely horrible on humans lol
Fluff and sass and naps, how relatable.
Cats are the standard of beauty that us poor humans can never live up to.
@@nah_.You really don't see many "ugly" cats. I was just thinking about how nice it would be to be a cat and the fur would hide all my unsightly skin problems
"What are we?"
"Regular people!"
"And what do we want?"
"Bread to feed our eleven Victorian children!"
feed them cake
đđđđ
AND YOU GET A BREAD AND YOU GET A BREAD AAAAND YOU GET A BREAD
@@liamfrederic5203 lmao
đ€Łđ€Łđ€Ł
Bella Hadid- named âmost beautiful woman in the world.â Has had multiple plastic surgeries to her face but does not admit to any of them. đ€·đ»ââïž
I know you commented before the interview came out but she recently said she regrets the nose job she had at 14, saying "I wish I had kept the nose of my ancestors. I think I would have grown into it."
She denies other surgeries but I think that quote is very powerful.
@@cordeliaistheone Itâs sad that she got it so young. It probably took courage for her to finally admit it.
@@aenigmatica8 the "It probably took courage for her to finally admit it" reminded me of when she said in an interview that she only got her first pair of designer shoes after high school. Oh no, poor thing :(
She did! I'm just sad she did her nose job at 14
@@cordeliaistheone thatâs sad because it seems like she was regretting the internalized racism she held when she was younger. A lot of middle eastern women living in the west are very self conscious about their noses, bc of white european beauty standards
It makes me sad for their *biological* children. I grew up finding my features in the faces of my loved ones and it making me feel beautiful and more connected to them. What are their children supposed to think when they inherit a feature that the celebrity felt wasn't good enough. How are their kids supposed to have self-confidence? I might be reading too much into it but it has crossed my mind multiple times seeing some of their children, thinking "they don't even look like them" and then seeing a before picture and it all making sense.
Iâve been told that I look like my grandma before her nose job. Itâs definitely messed with me to look at my nose and wonder what was so awful that she had to change it. And thatâs only a minor cosmetic surgery
I can definitely say that NOT looking like your family can really mess with you as a kid.
âŠand none of my family had cosmetic surgeries, I wasnât adopted. NOT a diss against adoption. Adoption is beautiful. But I legitimately believed that the lack of pictures before I was a toddler while there were Plenty of my Very White older brother vs âHollywood could use me to whitewash vs casting actual latinas or arab womenâŠfuck thisâŠâ meâŠIâd convinced myself that I was adopted. Because developing-child-brain.
And thatâs just a really MINOR case of that vs being held up to these Impossible and Artificial Standards of Beauty + who knows how many additional achievements + âthis is how you MUST act and MUST dressâ
You are absolutely *not* reading to much into this. I thought about it too. Easily most of those children will end up wanting a surgery too.
That feeling of connection to your ancestors you are describing actually plays an important role in self-empowerment and building self-confidence about your looks.
I also mostly thought about it the other way around. Applying to situations when your ancestors haven't done anything, but you are wanting to. Hating any of your natural features and wanting to/actually doing something to change them is basically like spitting into the faces of your parents/other ancestors you inherited the respective features from, and saying "such ugly people like yourselves shouldn't have procreated". That's exactly the message they would get if they find out about these thoughts of yours/see your modified face. You, the person who is reading this, please savour those ideas mindfully in the centre of your consciousness for a couple of minutes, without rushing. Then be maximum honest to yourself and ask yourself whether you're *really* having these thoughts about your ancestors when you look at them, whether you really wish to tell this openly to their faces and make sure they get clearly you really mean it (assuming you are not afraid of them and the main consequence of this would be the ties between you weakening/breaking)? If the answer is yes (idk about your relationship with your blood family and ancestors, some people want to maximally distant themselves from theirs and/or break any connection to them), then your wants are really true to your heart, so go for it!
And if the answer is no, then why are you thinking this way about yourself? There can actually be dozens of reasons you do this, but the truth is, there is no *actual worthy* one to hate your natural features, among them.
The next question you may want to ask yourself in this case is, wouldn't it be empowering to feel your ancestors standing behind you every time you look in the mirror, instead of banishing them away? To see their heritage shining through your physical features? Wouldn't feeling connected to your ancestors feel like they are inspiring a part of their strength into you (especially if you are of mixed ethnicity and have some family stories of opression and resistance connected to that, but even if you are not)?
When I was little I was dreaming about doing multiple plastic surgeries, however, thinking about it the way I have just described was a turning point in helping the 17 y.o. me build a strong confidence about my natural features and forget about my insecurities for years.
My personal pitfall of this hyperfocus on ancestors, however, was that one side of my tree is possibly related to the ancestors of the current mad dictator of Russia (fortunately no, Putin's grandparents are not my direct ancestors, but there is a high possibility of his parents being some-certainly-not-first-hand cousins to my grandmother due to all of them coming from neighbourhood villages in a highly homogeneous zone where many peasants were sharing similar features and thus, most likely, common genes), so lately I've started to have a sort of an internal conflict sometimes when looking in the mirror. On the one hand, I'm seeing the same gorgeous human I've accepted long ago and want to admire my reflection; yet on the other hand, _cr@p! my [eyes' shape] is sometimes looking like his, what should I do about it?..._ đ
Also, this method won't help with acceptance of aging signs and any other features you didn't inherit, but obtained over the course of your life, ones that reflect things you've been through, like traumas, injuries, lifestyle or any other experiences. You'd need another kind of mental exercises for these.
*certain* famous people are facetuning and putting filters on their literal babies and toddlers, these kids are fucked from the moment they are born
Which is kinda funny to me. Whenever a celebrity does have a kid, everyone thinks they will turn out to look like said celebrity so they get excited. (Which is also weird to me)
I heard a story once about a female reporter who was interviewing one of the classic movie beauties of the 1950âs. Maybe Rosalind Russell or Bette Davis, I donât knowâŠ. The reporter was admiring the actressâs picture in a magazine and said, âI wish I had legs like that!â The actress replied, âSo do I, so do I.â Hollywood is all an illusion.
Cindy Crawford said she overheard a woman saying "I wish I looked like Cindy Crawford" she told the woman "so do I!"
@@moomoocowsly While I agree, i'd like to just add that many people who are seen as beautiful/handsome to others, also judge and compare themselves to people they deem beautiful/handsome and instantly see their own flaws in this persons "perfections". Its easy to say appreciate ones own beauty but some of us don't believe when others say "you're really handsome" when on my best day I just feel "cute".
@@moomoocowsly it's both things! You talk about the other side of the coin. Reality is an illusion, albeit a persistent one eh? Your beliefs create your reality and illusions as much as the fact you live in a reality created with many illusioms too.
Reminds me of Margot Robbie talking about how the editors for Wolf of Wall Street digitally enhanced her legs. Illusions are everywhere.
I think there's also a huge difference between celebrities that have a negative self image and people recognizing the hard work, craftsmanship, and talent that goes into their image. I used to do a wee bit of modeling & when I hear Cindy Crawford say she wishes she looked like Cindy Crawford, I hear her recognizing that it takes the work of an entire group of people to create the image of the model that is Cindy Crawford & that, without them, she would not look as fantastic as people give her credit for. Super cool & humble, imo. âđœ
"Imagine you're a peasant" gurl I don't have to.
@Sarah Riemonn what's that
LMAOO đđđđđ yeahh..same
My great-grandparents were illiterate and lived like serfs (nevermind serfdom was abolished by that time, it was only on paper for many peasants) đ€·
*looking out at my chickens and vegetable patches* I have no idea what you are speaking of, I'm totally a queen who never gets chicken shit on her knees and has permanently dirty nails. đ
Right there with you, friend.
I love the term "professionally pretty." It's some peoples full time job to be visually appealing. That's literally how they pay their bills. That puts their decisions on a whole other plane in my mind. But I agree. They should be transparent about it and we should expect that of them.
I find myself thinking "damn they look mundane af" about a celebrity way more often than when I see some rogue makeup person who taught themselves everything and keeps experimenting despite reaching a decent level of expression. Even with plastic surgery, you can get extremely creative and there's only like 5 body mods that are in circulation 99% of the time. You can buy less or more stark features, but you can't buy creativity.
It seems easy, but like... it really does need to start at the top. If it could sabotage your unestablished career... oof.
If Mr B-list talks about his shiny new hairline, or Ms C-list gets honest about the new cheekbones, it doesn't really change things. The top A-list folks would need to get involved, and that's not what they and their many %people want.
Like the Hollywood / SK / etc idea of fitting in - and yet standing out. Everyone standardise your noses and jawlines please, but don't be too similar.
The thing that bothers me the most is that I, as a POC, grew up being told that "my skin was too tan" and "my brows were too thick". 15 years later, it's in fashion and people are paying big money to look like I did when I was being bullied for it.
And u bet ur ass it's all gonna change drastically again in another 15 years. So it doesn't even matter if you conform to societal beauty standards or not right now, they'll change and you'll have to get more stuff done to keep up. Or maybe you'll just fall into what's in fashion at that moment, it really doesn't matter.
You were told that by whom?
@@MrCmon113 pretty much everyone? My family, friends, teachers, all the media around me. I'm born and raised in Mexico and the beauty standards here are to look as white and voluptuous as possible, both of which I'm not.
They've been pretty different from USA's standards up until now, no one's tanning to look more attractive, and it's widely known that brown people tend to have thicker hair, not in a desirable way.
Why should women look alike? Do you and do it proudly.
@@dianacortes4253 Mexican women are gorgeous.
@@lm7092 I do, now that I'm an adult and I've run out of Fs to give lol. But growing up with this culture is hard for sure
New life (and celebrity) goals: Normalise being an old (single) maid who knits for orphans đ
@Sarah Riemonn omg nice
That is the exact future I want
can we be old lady knitting friends
I think married people came up with words like spinster because they were jealousđ I actually prefer being single these days.
@@josie3221 that would amazing
I look at aging as a privilege. My wrinkles, my scars, stretch marks, etc. are signs that I have been lucky enough to live and are an account of the different time periods of my life and stories I have to tell.
Exactly this. Each is a sign of a life lived and experiences gained. It makes us relatable and human.
That's an amazing way to look at it! Love that â€ïž
This kind of thinking is what's helping me deal with prematurely greying. It never used to bother me until lockdowns, then I had too much time to think. And sure I miss being brunette, but honestly my younger years were great but also a hot mess lol i am increasingly ok with closing the chapter on that and marching forward with my greys.
@@Stormy38044 totally get that! I started getting Grey hair when I was 25. At first it did make me feel old and kind of upset me but I realized that it's just a different look, a different stage, and no better or worse than the one before. And you know ,it's also OK to not like grey hair, the great thing is we can change hair color in modern times! I think the important realization is that it's just hair and shouldn't get you down :)
@@meganrunkel2083 thank you :) i hate how it brings me so much stress. I'll keep this in mind đ
When my mother found my brothersâ stash of Playboy and Penthouse, she got one out to show to my brother and his friends. They were mortified, as she pointed out where there was air-brushing, and told them sheâd been a nurse for 30 years, and had never seen a body like that.
Your mom is da bomb.
Alpha Mum.
Your mum is a queen đžđ»
I read magazines as a teen that were German, called BRAVO and YEAH, which has quite a bit of photoshop in them, but they had to put a * star to the name underneath the picture, wherever it was photoshopped.
They also featured two unedited, naked people in the middle-section of the magazine, casually sitting on a yogaball or standing on a colourful cube. They would answer questions, like 'What is your favorite part of your body' and 'what are you insecure about?' and things about tattoos and piercings and what they would like in a man/woman and their daily life.
It gave me (and every reader) a good sense of what a normal adult body looked like, rather than fake ones in videoclips. The "Break Out" and "Hitkrant" in the Netherlands had the same thing, but without the photoshop for the celebrities, so everyone looked (exceptionally) flawed and even the naked twenty-somethings in the middle pages looked unflatteringly discoloured (because not even the contrast or light was edited) and bored. Either way, I think that it would be something to have more teen-magazines (in the USA) that feature a subtle naked person in it. Nothing graphic or triggering or "sexy", just a naked lady or man, standing around and doing the dishes or sitting on the couch.
@@Widdekuu91 Oh good old days, I remember those German magazines. Loved it.
âIf you worked at a Victorian factory youâre probably more worried about getting bread for your 11 childrenâ - my brain heard âgetting bred for your 11 childrenâ and was horrified đ
LOG OFF OF TUMBLR
@@carl5905 honestly solid advice đ
đđ€Łđđ€Łđđ€Łđđ€Łđđđ thanks!! I needed that!!! Love it!!
LMAO nahhh đ
Thatâs what I thought too!!!!
Another important thing to remember is that celebrities can afford to have ALL their clothing custom fitted, so if you're wondering "why does this garment look so much better on them?" it's probably because it fits really well. The mass produced clothing that most people wear isn't going to fit perfectly because it's made to standard sizes and humans come in a wide variety of shapes.
Omg yes they have all of their clothes tailored to their exact body dimensions and it makes a HUGE difference, once there was a dress I loved but it was too big on top but fit on bottom so I decided to get it tailored and I'll tell you the difference was night and day with how flattering the tailored dress was compare to how it looked when it 'kinda' fit- which wasn't even bad.
@@SofieBubbles Yes! I do alterations for a living, and it makes such a big difference! A suit looks so much better once I make the weird wrinkles go away and shorten the sleeves to the right length for the person's arms.
@@vincentbriggs1780 This! I have few dresses and clothes that compliment my shape, because it's difficult for me to find the right model(I've average shoulder lenght but small chest circumference and very small breasts, wide hips but small waist and slight lordosis)and literally nothing looks right without tweaking, and even after that it's still not good. Same for shoes.
Just having tailored-to-perfection clothes makes a huge difference in how good your figure looks!
This is why I love that there's a clear crossover with this channel and ones like Bernadette Banner. It's true that not everyone can sew - you need the space, you need the time, you need the practice, the money, the ability - but you can get a clearer overall idea of what is behind all of this stuff and what it does
And the worst part is, even the mass-produced stuff is altered for the model who models it in the catalogue! It gets pinned in the back so you even get an unrealistic view of what the stuff you CAN buy looks like.
Basically, just like Mary Schmich said some twenty years ago: "Don't read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly."
This happened to me watching top model in high school. It was fun in terms of banter or whatever but after like one season i had to stop watching it because of how it affected my self image. I was and am still thin, but it didnât matter. That type of thinking really ingrains itself especially in young impressionable people
Honestly i don't feel i'm ugly
I feel the model is ugly đ€Łđ€Ł
Narsisictic
looking at a before and after photoshop for models messed with me when I looked at them too long. at first I liked the before images more(the after looked weird at first), but if I looked too long then I started liking the after image more, even though the models were already gorgeous prior to the photoshop. messed up stuff.
Or fat.... like I really want to be anorexic?!
And Baz Luhrman in "Sunscreen" - and if there's no plastic surgery there's expert makeup artists and photoshop.
The joke is: when youre young you look good but feel not confident. When youre older you dont look like the beauty industry wants you to look but you feel beautiful.
I babysit a young girl who asked me why people even care about looking fat. It was so cute, I'm sure I haven't thought her way in a long time.
Whatâd you tell her
@@johnsokoll In honesty she has a really short attention span and was on to the next thing before I could explain. She was kind of saying it like a rhetorical question like she didn't care however I answered, as if to criticize the reasoning behind anyone who thought there was an answer. If she had let me explain I probably would have said something along the lines of: Some people might associate being skinny with being healthy and living longer. However it can be unhealthy to be too skinny and not eat enough too. Also it's easier to do more activities at a healthy weight. However she didn't want to actually know. She seemed more interested in stopping thinking on considering it important at the time. Ignorance is bliss, but it's also good to be informed about risky behavior. However, she's got lots of time to figure that out, she's at a healthy weight and I just wanted to keep things fun and not lecture her so I just moved on with the conversation where she went next instead of laying out reasoning on it because I like her tolerance and would prefer to have her remain accepting of others. I think it's better to be nice than right and the longer she can remain kind the better off her life will be. She's not the judgmental type but just in case.
I absolutely hate it when celebrity's say to their young fans that this is natural beauty and and who set false standards. Plastic surgery is okay if you are honest with the people who look up to you and compare themselves to you. Edit: please also look at the replys, who add some very strong opinions.
@Sarah Riemonn omg nice
i feel like this is partially true, but if celebrities talked completely openly about their plastic surgery i think it would encourage people to view plastic surgery as normal/no big deal, and might even encourage people to get it (especially young people who grow up hearing about it). there are still a lot of problems with plastic surgery and i think we need to be careful about normalizing it
@@vitalyaloves I agree, I don't think we should hate on celebrities and people for having or getting plastic surgery but I don't think plastic surgery itself should be normalized or encouraged in any kind of way
@@vitalyaloves i agree and this wasnt the look I was going for. I meant as in tell young viewer that their nose jobs and tummy tucks etc are natural and they worked hars for it, therefore encouraging the viewer to try again and again disappointing themselves until it turns into something like an eating disorder
We need to understand what leads women to lie about their cosmetic surgeries in the first place and try to fix the root of the problem, not trying to treat the symptoms.
If you didn't have surgeries, you'd be criticized for your looks. Now if you had plastic surgery, you get criticized for being vain and narcissistic.
Immediate solution: get surgery and lie that you were born this way in hopes of finally pleasing people and getting them off your back so your self-esteem can get a break for once.
The people who lie about having surgery are also victims of society who is never content with anything women do. Now the question is why is our society never content with anything women do? Thousands of years of patriarchal ideals encouraged by capitalism perhaps. Well, here's the root.
I was dating a guy and we were shopping around together one time. He saw a picture of an underwear model and told me he wished he looked like that, and I was like, âYou know this model doesnât even look like that in real life right? Most models are photoshopped into oblivion for ads like this.â This guyâs mind was blown. I was so sad to see this person (who I found actually incredibly attractive and fit) feel like he needed to look like something that isnât real.
Yeah, pics of Kylie Jenner irl vs instagram are WILD. She's totally unlike her IG posts.
Some people are that good looking though. But alot of people forget that it's also part of winning a genetic lottery and spending alot of time and energy on working out and eating well. So Photoshopped into oblivion is a bit of a stretch in my opinion. The purpose of a model is to sell a product, make the product look attractive to other people. Not making people feel good about themselves.
@@MrVinceMunro I understand what you mean, and I maybe was using too much hyperbole, but Iâd like to argue that this guy I was dating *had* won this genetic lottery and worked on himself to look really good. I know products are meant to sell, but itâs also not good for people to look at ads and constantly feel like theyâre not good enough. Similar to Karolinaâs spiel, I donât really have an answer or want to make people stop what theyâre doing or anything, I just wish there was a little more transparency I guess?
I actually used to look like that model (yes, some of us do), and people ALL THE TIME told me I was too skinny, called me bony or skeletal, accused me very angrily of being bulimic or anorexic, including men I dated. Trust me, no matter what you look like, there are always tons of people who can't wait to tell you how ugly you are. It's really messed up.
@@toastoast Yeah that indeed would be nice. I feel bad sometimes too because of all the perfect masculine guys out there, not always but sometimes it just gets to me. The market for women is even a bit more harsh I think. More transparency would indeed be nice, for everyone!
I have had 3 cancers so I am covered with scars and the left side of my face has been reconstructed. The one that bothers me is the long scar from breast to bikini line. I had stage 3 ovarian cancer. Every time I complain about crop tops, low waist jeans or bikinis being off limits but husband says, "you are still here, alive and I love you". But it still bothers me. I won't have plastic because after so many surgeries I don't want to go through another.
I hope you can find it within yourself to love yourself moreâ„ I do not know you but just like your husband I am also happy you're still here
You kicked cancerâs ass and have the battle scar to prove it! Wear that scar proudly for all those who succumbed ((like my late cousin)). Fuck cancer, youâre awesome
What about a tattoo? I can imagine that's a bit drastic, but it changes the 'unwanted-conversationstarter-subject' of the scar, into a "Yeah, I love flowers!' conversation.
Or crop-tops with lace, that pointy-shaped hang over the scar and, without covering it up fully, still steal away the spotlight from it and make it easier/lighter to casually show in everyday life.
you're an absolute badass. wear those scars like they're war medals- they're not ugly or flaws, they're permanent reminders of how much you've been through to survive. if anyone points them out, saying you had cancer will probably shut them up, but if you don't feel like talking about it, tell them to mind their own business or make up a wild story (they're the rude ones tbh). rock those scars, you'll look tough as hell!
As someone who is in their 30s and into kpop, I feel sorry for the teens and early twenty-somethings who are also into Korean media. Plastic surgery is common, and people know it happens even if they don't blurt it out as soon as they get something done. But that 'glow up' and 'lost weight' ect has started to appear in comments in kpop, too, even though *we know* plastic surgery over there is relatively cheap and common in their entertainment industry.
As another Kpop fan, who's in her mid-20s, I agree. We should be as honest and real as Jessi is about it.
@@inferiorinferno8859 I don't know if Korea could handle more than one Jessi lolol but I'd definitely like them, as famous people who have young fans, to not try and pretend like they didn't get work done. A lot of the time, pre-debut pictures float around, so it's actually not that hard to see the differences if you really want to know.
I'm a young kpop fan but come on now ain't no way they didn't get something done
The procedures they get done aren't even anything special or imo worth it. Oh wow, you tweaked your nose a little, now you look the same +1 or maybe even 2 angles that will look slightly better on a still photograph. Couldn't have achieved that with make-up at all. Oh wait, you're not supposed to contour as a Korean pop star because your skin will no longer look like a layer of white modeling chocolate. Surgery is obviously the only option.
I agree on most parts of that comment, exactly the one, that plastic surgery isnât cheap
It's interesting to look at celebrities next to their un-famous siblings.
It gets even better when you look at them next to their also famous cousins
Yeah, like Giselle BĂŒndchen has a twin sister but you can't even see a resemblance
@@BelaAlmeida I don't know what photos you're looking at, but Gisele and her twin look a lot alike except that Giselle's bone structure is more prominent, like Zsa Zsa Gabor compared to her sister Eva. Ironically, perhaps, Gisele's sister looks a lot younger than Gisele.
@@giboi03 lol. They bought the same face.
And their parents
What helped me accept my looks was reminding myself that I strongly resemble my mom and I don't think she is ugly.
People have the tendency to be more critical with themselves than others.
I love this perspective!
This is such a great way to think!
Great point. I do the same with food; If I wouldn't deny this amount of food for a guest, I shouldn't deny it for me. It helps.
Yes, I love this. Iâve always disliked many things about the way I look, but I look like my dad (who passed away earlier this year). Dad was handsome and lovely person and Iâm actually proud to look like him â€ïž
Trueee!! I used to be insecure about my nose, but since it resembles my dad's (and that's probably the only feature I got from him), I never want to change it, it's kinda sentimental for me now lol
wow, i actually have all the features that would have been âbeautifulâ in the 17th century? thatâs interesting, i thought i was ugly. being pale with a fat face in the 21st century has made me feel pressured into tanning and contouring with makeup, when i never even thought about how beauty standards change, and how the idea of beauty is a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT. this video made me feel a lot better about myself, thank you so much.
If u were to go to an Arab country u would be the beauty standard since paleness and chubbiness are looked up too. Like u said, itâs a social contract that changes over time and place. Itâs kind of cool to think we would have been worshipped if we were born in a specific time and place that adored our features.
This is honestly the best perspective to have imo. I'm super thin and small, definitely nowhere near hourglass shaped like what the beauty standard is today. But then I think about the 20s and 30s, 60s and 90s, and I realize that my body type HAS BEEN and WILL EVENTUALLY BE the beauty standard, even if it's not during the years of my prime (was a child in the 90s, I'm 30 now). I feel like keeping this in mind helps us remember that most of us "peasants" are beautiful to someone somewhere.
@@PrincessWhatsername I would love to know what it feels like to be tiny!! Iâve always been super curvy and tall even when I starve to where my BMI was under 18
Ugh, I know. Iâve always wrestled with my big stupid boobs
@@kristenheatherei-star8254 I'm the same, I tried to save for breast reduction surgeries and to remove my uterus but it's more expensive than a university degree
I'm glad we're finally talking about this. I remember being around 19 when Kylie Jenner blew off and toooooons of people including her and her family swore that she looked like that naturally and that her lips looked like that because of that weird sucky thing and, of course, her lipstick kit. It was infuriating tbh. Everyone has the right to do whatever tf they want with their own bodies, but lying like that just to sell a product and maybe because they really are that insecure about themselves, is fucked up when they have millions upon millions of followers.
End to my own rant. This is something that bothers me a lot, struggling with your self image is hard and it's been only getting harder now that everyone seems to be having something done or using tons of filters on their pics.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Beauty is skin deep, with all the saying about Beauty it is enough to drive anyone crazy....rich or poor beauty she come from within every woman.
Instead of focusing on worldly standards of outer Beauty. Take time to accept every inch of your face eye, nose lips đ you were meant to be the way you are...Cosmetics enhance but true Beauty comes from withinđ
@@dnitagill7 PERIODT. You put what born this way by lady gaga is supposed to say into simple words, aside from accepting sexual love for the same gender + tolerating people that cross and blow up lines in the binary cistem!
@@diy-guyishere7615 I'm sorry I did not post anything concerning this discussion....direct your comments elsewhere
.
I have a theory that beauty has almost always been defined by what is hard to attain. If it's easy to attain, over time it becomes less desirable. It's whatever is "different" or "hard to achieve", whether that be a tiny waist or pale complexion. When it was hard for people to put on weight? Ironized yeast and padding gave people a "desirable" figure. Once nutrition and food access improved, then being borderline underweight came into fashion. Now, it's impossible curves and fat distribution. I feel like we've seen this with people wanting to become tan, too, something hard to achieve when you're inside working most of the day. But when people were outside working? They wanted the harder-to-achieve pale skin tone. It's all such contrived BS!
Good point. Just like so many things in style, once it's available to the masses, it's not desirable anymore.
Yes of course. The hard to obtain is always desired. Thin, exercised and tanned (but not naturally brown) became beautiful as soon as factory and office work made people pale and lumpy. Have you seen the Renoir nudes? They should be in the gym and weight watchers!
Agreed!
'Beauty' and aesthetics as a philosophy, and especially women's beauty, really entered the public discourse in a new way in the 18th century when the industrial revolution and colonial trade was creating a new earning middle class in western Europe. Then it was no longer just art and poetry talking about 'common' (often biblical or Classic) beauty ideals, but an active discussion (like nowadays). And the reason? Landed gentry, the noble classes, needed to invent 'good taste' to differentiate themselves from the newly rich merchant class who could suddenly afford to spend the same amount (or more) on fashion, art and daily luxuries as the nobility. It's very fascinating and VERY frustrating to look into! And technically that hasn't stopped since - insanely pricy and pristine white athleisure clothing, or hellishly bare minimalist interior design where no clutter or spare boxes and pens should ever exist, are another form of 'good taste' moving away from daily enjoyment and whatever fashions become more widely available to larger masses. In that sense, the wealthy constantly move the goalposts of beauty in all areas of life, and we can blame aristocrats in the early 1700s for that. (And also present day celebrities for continuing the same.)
@@jasminv8653 You are so totally right!
I think itâs really important to be honest. I had my breasts done because they were terribly uneven. And has them lifted. Every person I dated I told them I had work done. Any time a woman complimented them I told them I had work done. And Iâve even been told that it was impactful that I was honest.
Same here! I had breast reduction surgery and I'm not ashamed to tell other women if they ask something about it.
thank you
@@carolcake1920 my neighbour had that done and it was life changing for her
That's amazing
Thank you for being frank and honest about it. Thank you for actually making people aware that it's just something people can do, and they can have a conversation about it that doesn't have to include them feeling low self-esteem about their body.
Oh wow, when you said "these people are desperate" - you singlehandedly changed my perspective on celebrities! I thought they have such a glamorous life, getting everything they want. But you're right, they're desperate for money, influence, and not to become irrelevant.
One thing that Iâve found makes this problem worse, especially among young people, is tying appearance to quality of life. The mindset among a lot of my teenage peers is that you canât be happy, glamorous, or lovable unless you look like a super model. Itâs really sad, and I hate that Iâve also fallen into this trap. Iâve started to care so much about my appearance and the appearance of others. I live in New York and seeing all of these perfect looking models and actors not only on social media but in real life too makes me put so much importance on appearance. I come from a low income background but you simply canât be respected unless you present yourself a certain way. Atleast thatâs the mindset Iâve come to believe. I wonder if things are this bad elsewhere in the world. I want to move out of this city and live a more quiet life where superficiality isnât as important.
Iâve moved nearly 50 times around the US, Mexico, and even for shorter stints in China and Ecuador: itâs an issue everywhere Iâve lived. HOWEVER, I will say that some places are more obsessive than others. I find that in big cities like NYC, LA, Mexico City, etc itâs typically more predominant because of the major industries like modeling being centered there. However, some smaller cities or towns can be just as toxic depending on the culture. You would think a place like Utah (where I lived the longer than anywhere else) wouldnât have such an obsession with beauty, but itâs almost worse in a way. They nicknamed it silicon slopes now and itâs one of the places with the highest percentages of cosmetic procedures per capita. Meanwhile, I now live in a small city in southern Mexico, and itâs much more relaxed. This area is where the indigenous Zapatista movement rebelled to regain control in the 90s and although itâs certainly not perfect, itâs far more anarchist and anti-capitalist than anywhere else Iâve lived. People here still of course appreciate beauty but it comes more so in the form of artisanal clothing, art, and caring for your natural features. Most women here donât wear makeup, they instead use natural handmade products to care for their skin and hair, braid their hair in intricate designs, wear traditional indigenous clothing, and prioritize comfort as we all walk a lot here.
yh i went to London recently and saw loads of super skinny modelesque girls compared to the smaller towns near where i live
This thought process itâs not entirely off as people are significantly treated better and they are perceived as beautiful and they are presented with much more opportunities in life. People treat them kinder and acknowledge them.
@@iloveazaeliabanks my same thought after london visit
Itâs not as bad outside big metropolitan cities
One of the many things I like about Dolly Parton is how open she's been about her plastic surgeries and her wigs. Thanks for making this video!
I was going through the comments to see if anyone had brought up Dolly Parton yet and I was not disappointed
A true queen. "It costs a lot to look this cheap." đ
Seriously. Could you imagine if she pretended that was her read hair and then sold a line of hair care products that purported to give hair like hers? Oh wait⊠thatâs what hundreds of other celebrities do⊠:/
@@AlbinoAxolotl Luckily Dolly isn't that kind of person
I was hoping I'd see her mentioned here. She is a Queen. Along with Cher who has never had a problem being open. They are amazing creatures ^_^
"You look like a regular 2021 model, but it's 1667 and no one cares."
*W H E E Z E*
I am in the opposite situation and Iâm not okay
@@namedrop721 you look like a 1667 model?
@@yureituesday PFFT
@@yureituesday ahhahahaahhahahahahaah
she literally described me
This is true, and sad. I remember around the 2016-2017 when everything (on Instagram especially, but also CZcams) was about those super cakey and heavy makeups with colorful and glittery eyeshadows, snatched cheekbones, plumped matte lips and overall just sharp and clean-cut looks. At the time no one was talking about how fake everything was, how the âsuper smooth-foundation-that-looks-like-skinâ was unattainable (because it was photoshopped, of course!) and the big and pouty lips were just fillers. The perfect shaped brows? Tattooed, micro-bladed. The long, curved and thick eyelashes? Extensions. The super voluminous hair, constantly done and styled? Wigs. Even the eyes were often contact lenses! Every single thing was analyzed and perfected while lying to our faces and pretending it was something we couldâve done at home by ourselves and with our modest (really modest) income. I still have the pricey products they lobotomized me to buy, thinking they wouldâve helped me. I once spoke to a really nice woman in a makeup store, who helped me realize i was going overboard with buying a primer that wouldâve literally clogged all my pores (and contained silicon) to make my skin appear more âsmooth and flawlessâ. I was 16 at the time.
Whenever I get hung up about how a famous person looks, I try to find videos or pictures of them live. Like a artist during a concert or an actor enterring a screening. Sure they still look beautiful, but the lighting isn't perfect and the whole thing was less staged so you can see more wrinkles, signs of tiredness, painful smiles and bored faces. It makes me feel like I've seen people like that before.
It's crazy that women's bodies go in and out of fashion. Just embrace what you have.
Control weight is good.
đ
*Healthy weight* should always be in fashion.
trans bodies go in and out of fashion, we never see real men or real women
Based
I agree with everything you said. And even without plastic surgery, the money can provide you with a stylist, tailor, hair and makeup, skincare, dietician and trainer, access to supplements, massage and therapy, reduced stress from someone else doing the mundane tasks for you. So who wouldn't look and feel better with all of that at their disposal
Not to mention a nutritious diet, opportunities for excellent self care, and money never being an issue. Would HRH Queen Elisabeth still be going strong at 95 if she had immigrated from Jamaica, lived in the Bronx, and cleaned white peopleâs toilets all her life?
Agreed
Absolutely. I'm never not thinking about this. In fact sometimes when I'm plagued by hubris I think to myself, anyone, regardless of age and gender, literally anyone, can look better than me if they have the resources. I am just coasting on the "lottery of my birth". Other times it's helpful to think a bit less negatively about myself when I look at someone better than me.
In either case, there's some part of me asbolutely despising the comparison - be it positive or negative. And I really think this is where Karolina makes a great point about transparency and getting rid of comparison altogether (however impossible that may seem).
YESSS
This comment needs more likes
"They're not lying, they're just not saying anything about it..." That's called a lie of omission and just so you know a lie of omission is still a lie and is still wrong for the harm it can cause.
Except when celebrities DO actually lie like KJenner claiming her glow up was due to her beauty line or lip suction cups. People actually believed, tried it, and got hurt/lost money
^^^^
Jennifer Lopez lies about this to sell her skincare line. She digs her heels saying sheâs never had BOTOX which is literally just a brand, she could have had a different brand of the same thing. Thatâs like saying Iâve never had Advil (a specific brand) to hide the fact that Iâve had ibuprofen (the general medical term).
@@Readytoflyhome there's a difference between a random person at work or where else who's had surgery and doesn't want to tell it, obviously, and a celebrity who has an impact on teenagers, who, everyone knows, are insecure of themselves, see their body changing and are going through an unpleasant physical phase. For those teenagers, the celebrities who had work done and know the majority of their fans are teenagers, MUST say they had surgery due to the industry they are working in and the massive pressure to look perfect.
The big problem is celebrities whose followers/fans are teenagers.
Because teenagers also believe naively what celebrities say...
For those of us who are not teenagers anymore, we know who's lying and did not have suddenly a miracle "face and body change thanks to puberty" with thinner nose, bigger lips, appearing eyelid... This is called magic or... lie!
No, we're not entitled to know every detail of a celebrities life, including cosmetic procedures. They don't commit crimes by altering their own face so we do not need to know.
Definitely, there's too much of this. Lip fillers is the one that baffles me the most - it's touted as the quickest and easiest go-to for making a person look beautiful. IT ISN'T. The news needs breaking: *not everyone's face looks right with plump lips.* You HAVE to take the rest of your features into account before deciding to have lip fillers, because if you have a long, straight nose, or a nose with a downward-facing tip, or a short philtrum (that's the vertical ridge bit below the bottom of your nose and above the middle of your top lip,) or a narrow, pointy chin... all of those things work better with smaller, thinner lips. Pouty, bee-stung lips with those features just look wrong - it makes a person look like a duck with a bad stink wafting under its beak. Whenever I see a woman with fillers who really didn't have the right face for them, I just feel so sad for them. It's like "Why? Who talked you into doing that? I bet you looked just fine before - way prettier and far less scary than you do now. Who made you feel so down on yourself that you thought this was the only route you could go to fix it?"
it's good that most of the time lip fillers aren't, at least, permanent
The scary thing about lip fillers is that if done incorrectly, they can migrate from your lips to other parts of your face. đ
@@juneannerubin not only of done incorrectly either. If you get fillers done regularly over many enough years some will migrate regardless of how well done the initial procedure is or how professionals the surgeon who did it is. People believe that itâs not permanent but thatâs not 100% true, often a tiny percentage of the filler wonât break down and stays and over time if you keep getting fillers this number increases.
me, a white mulatto with grandma's lips: đđđ
one korean celebrity was asked what skincare routine she does and she's like "I use money, I'm visiting dermatologist number of times a month" and she's still pretty young
The transparency is refreshing
Korean celebs are always proactive in promoting skin care
Tiffany Young?
@@souumcorvo Lee Hi
@@aliceholtz oh! I love Lee Hi, her voice is incredible! I thought that was Tiffany because she said something similar recently but is kinda good to know that more Korean celebrities are being open about this topic. Thank you :)
I have a round face, I got a little more cheekbone when I hit puberty, but my face mostly stayed the same. I used to think my face was just round because I was fat, and that if I did a better job dieting I would get a nice, fashionable, angular face. But then I was reading a memoir from one of my great grandmothers where she was talking about her mother and mentioned that she was a very thin woman. There was a picture of this great-great-grandmother of mine attached, and she had the exact same face shape as me. That changed my perspective on my face shape - I just had a round face because it had been passed down to me, and even if I were to lose a lot of weight, I would still have the same face shape as my great-great-grandmother.
I honestly love the body positivity and genuine outrage at the lack of transparency in the beauty industry that you're exhibiting here. It resonates so deeply with me, thank you.
While I agree with every single point you've made, I want to add something. More than the fickleness of beauty standards, our tendency to equate beauty to worth is more disturbing. Those celebrities might really look that perfect irl, but why should that reduce our worth? Why is being average so looked down on?
That's a good point!!! equating someone's beauty to their worth is another huge topic which I wish was discussed more
Yes, like a commenter said above. You see people online saying celebs who age well, age well because theyâre pretty on the inside, and those that age less well must be ugly on the inside. Itâs gross that actual adults, even if theyâre young adults, really think being pretty automatically makes you a good person. I know some people who are lovely on the inside but havenât aged as gracefully and itâs because theyâve been through trauma. I canât imagine how they must feel when they see the lame comments about whoâs âaging like milkâđ
Yes, this!
yes omg why is the highest praise "shes so pretty" like ok but can we talk abt the fact that she just graduated from harvard?
I agree
I REALLY wish historical dramas tried to cast people who looked like they're straight out of whatever portrait style the era is intended to be from. It would be so cool and it'd be easy to do
FRrr.. they cast the most rich and well known actors with straight white teeth / other modern beauty standards...to play peasants. and it makes my brain bleed.
you know that's something I noticed while watching Conan the barbarian recently, a lot of actors there have croocked teeth and skin that just normal, it kind of makes it look more real an in place than bright white smile of today's actors in roles in ancient or medieval settings.
I'm still traumatized by Game of Thrones's hairless women and men tbh. Especially the shaved genitals, since that's really just some stupid north american porn trend from barely 10 years ago, and european women from my grandma's generation still didn't even remove their legs or armpits hair.
Like, extreme violence, blood and massacre is completely fine, but hairy poosy will hurt our modern sensibilitiesđąđąđą
Yes, that's an excellent point ! The only actress I can think of that may fit this is the one who played Jane Bennet in Pride and Prejudice 95. Especially since she's the beauty of the family
The regency house party here on yt
"You can look like this, too! All it takes is a personal dietitian, personal trainer, a good tailor, and plastic surgery to cover all the parts that those folk didn't account for."
Hasn't it been that way all throughout history? Even the most average-looking (even outright ugly) rich person can look like a million bucks with the right (read: most expensive) diet, skincare routine, professionally-done makeup, and custom-tailored clothing.
i really love this video, to be honest i think about this a lot. what i've noticed is that women are heavily shamed for getting surgeries done, which is why they aren't honest about it. they're expected to be completely naturally perfect, which is impossible. and so they lie about it, which isn't their fault, it's society's fault for having these impossible standards and then shaming women for their method of achieving it
Ugly hurts, pretty hurts, no one wins.
These impossible standards are created by them in the first place. It's just not talked about because they need to be viewed as special, and then secondarily it perpetuates the expectations and the judgements within society. There no reason for pity here.
Thereâs an art museum I went to and in one corner thereâs two painting of women that look pretty similar but one looks more conventionally attractive. The guides always ask people who they think they are, and people normally say mother-daughter or sisters, but itâs actually the same woman. She was from a prominent family and after seeing how the first painting came out, she mustâve asked the painter to redo it and make her look better.
oh, woah! Do you remember what the paintings were called?
Think though many artist throughout history were on commission, so if they wanted to make money they had to make the buyer happy. Many didn't get paid until they were done so if the customer was unhappy they would not get reimbursed for supplies and time. Also, if they made royals mad they may not be asked or blacklisted. Many artist were smart to tweak a portrait to make women appear softer, younger, thinner because it was all about the money but their future.
I went to design school, and in the "visualization and representation" class, our professor gave as an assignment to do portraits of each other. While I was doing my friend's, she said she didn't like her own nose and asked me to make it prettier when I draw it. Of course I didn't change it; I drew it exactly as it was. Not compromising my grade for this. đ
!!!!!!!! Wow
Iâd love to know too!!!
My friend and I overheard a guy tell his friend that I was really hot. His friend's reply: "yeah, but she is on crutches." I had sprained my ankle that summer and spent over a month hobbling around on crutches until my ankle healed. In that moment I suddenly understood what handicapped people had to deal with. They would never have the same chances as everyone else, nor will they ever be seen (by most) as beautiful. That scenario forever changed my perspective about how we see each other and why it is so important to judge a person by who they are inside.
wow, thatâs disgusting đ
Oh man I feel this. I sprained my ankle and my foot a few weeks ago, and I had to walk into a gas station (hobble into a gas station more like it), and my foot was all bandaged up and I was having a hard time walking. There were like three dudes in that store and they all shoved past me and seemed annoyed I was walking slowly. Iâm not used to that, usually Iâm a very fast walker and guys smile at me and open doors. That made me feel for everyone who is permanently injured or disabled, and made me determined to never treat anyone like that(even though I hope I never have treated anyone like that!)
@@nihilism6226 dude. please go outside touch the grass
That's such a weird criteria for beauty. What a weirdo.
@@nihilism6226 damn dude did your life really detoriate so much that now you not only judge people but you've also started judging non violent, cute shit in nature
I agree with everything you said.
I have mixed feelings. I agree that it does harm to average women for celebrities to not disclose plastic surgeries. At the same time, celebrity women are treated horrrrrrrribly about their looks, including if they admit to surgeries. So I see why they keep it to themselves. They are VERY damned if they talk, dammed if they don't talk.
It's alright if people want to have plastic surgery done, but it becomes toxic when the rest of us gets compared to them and told that if you don't look like that it's your fault. Like it's because you're lazy and don't work up enough, or you're unhealthy because you don't use their "self-care" skin routines, or whatever. So thank you Karolina for making this video, it's done a lot for my mental health!
Watching Bernadette Banner: "Ah, what a cool thing I learned."
Watching Rachel Maksy: "The cosplay gods have blessed us again"
Watching Karolina: *"AH, YES. THE RAGE IS BACK đđđđđđđ"*
Honestly, thatâs just a healthy costube diet.
Onlyjayus: here's how to scam people
jeenie weenie: omg so true
cookie: lol i needed that
liana jade: cool I should try that
mdj: WHAT
I just finished a Bernadette video đ we stan the queens âš
Holy trinity đ
I follow these 3 like the original Charmed witches xxx
I see a pattern here in defending the rich and beautiful. "No, they've become beautiful naturally" is the same as "nooo they're so rich because they deserve all their income".
It's like we as a society are under a delusion that the rich and beautiful are too perfect to lie. Because if they're lying it means there's no way, the rest of us can ever be like them.
i think it comes from the idea that "rich=good," which is simply untrue
men are getting botox too and looking like waxworks, aging like wine means getting corked
One of the saddest things I see online is everyday people simping for the rich and famous. It's depressing and delusional.
Absolutely.
Yep, they just keep licking the boot.
iâm from a small town and the first time i saw michelle pfeifferâs face in ladyhawke i was spellbound. i felt like that peasant in a museum. i had no idea such beauty existed in the world and i think it filled me with an eternal aesthetic longing.
When I was a teen I desperately wanted a nose job but then I got older and realised that I had my mum's nose and thought that was really cool. It's definitely made me feel way more comfortable about it.
*âslams deskâ* THANK YOU! It infuriates me to see how celebrities and influencers try to get away with claiming that they look âperfectâ when in reality, they have multiple cosmetic procedures done but donât publicly disclose to perpetuate the delusion of their image. Whatâs even worse is that the cosmetic procedures are not enough to the point that they still edit/photoshop their features to achieve and show off an extremely unrealistic standard of beauty and attractiveness.
I kinda get why some women conceal the fact that they had plastic surgery. Because if you didn't have surgeries, you'd be criticized for your looks. Now if you had plastic surgery, you get criticized for being vain. Immediate solution: get surgery and lie that you were born this way in hopes of finally pleasing people and getting them off your back so your self-esteem can get a break. That's sad.
Looking at you, Bella Hadid. Disclaimer, you're a lovely person and beautiful either way. But it's ok to admit you had really excellent, subtle work done! It's part of the job, all your friends do it, you have the money for a good surgeon, why not?
@@miss_conduct. I understand if that was the reason but the big problem is that there are celebrities/influencers who will try to use their looks to sell beauty or health products to their audiences and donât disclose that the real reason they look like how they do is not through using the product. Itâs through the cosmetic procedures that they have done and editing of their advertising images to the point that the goal of using the product to get the same result is unrealistic.
Solution: Ignore âsocialâ media. Works for me. Then again, Iâm closing in on 40 yo, so being out of puberty makes all the difference tbh.
A lot of people/fans defend a celebrity because they want to believe that if they too lose weight or buy this brand of lip liner or contouring palette or drink this detox tea, etc etc then they can achieve physical perfection.
Non celebrities and non rich folk want a quick fix for their perceived flaws instead of just accepting reality.
If they stopped thinking like that, they'd quickly realize their flaws aren't actually flaws that anyone other than them notices.
Exactly. Fans get defensive because they want to believe they can also achieve their idol's looks. It's a reaction of fear.
Its also really annoying when the celebrity denies any work done and try to push products that "will make you look the same " and that they are "obsese with" for like a week and then push another miracle product...but when you call them out their fans attack youđ
It's like when they defend their actions or ascribe them traits like kindness, it's important to them to believe that this person would be their friend and that the energy they put into them isn't going to a bad person
That's exactly what I was thinking! People want to believe their looks are simply the result of some weight loss, diet change or other natural cause, so they can keep the fantasy that they too can achieve this perfection with a few simple steps.
What breaks my heart is people get mock when they do come ford like Dove Cameron. She talked about suffering from body dysmorphia and anorexia, the ugly comments I found under her music video made me tear up. What right do these strangers have to tell how she should or shouldnât look like. Maybe if they had been more positive in the past she wouldnât have had so much work done young.
What PAINS me about beauty standards is that having low self steam because you don't fit in them is not an individual, personal problem anymore. It's so much bigger that that. And the fix is not simply to "love yourself". Nowadays you don't only feel bad about yourself but if you're "ugly", you're invisible. You could be great at something but the people you encounter won't pay attention to you anyway. You could contribute SO MUCH as a person but no one sees you or really listens. You have to be THE BEST at something for people to pay attention at what you do or what you have to say. Maybe your best friend or your mum or your partner listens and cares, but no one else does. Idk. That's my perspective. You could have so much to offer and it will simply "fall into a ripped sac" as we say in spanish (?)
I got a nose job at 16. I broke my nose as a kid, but I didn't realise it - probably happened in dodgeball or volleyball during gym class. It didn't bleed, my face didn't go purple. My parents, friends, teachers and my own self didn't notice it was broken. My nose went through the whole calcification process and became rigid again, but as I didn't go for medical assistance at the time of the fracture, it became crooked (front view was C-shaped and side view was S shaped). I thought my nose was ugly, but my mom tried to help me love it because we thought it must me ethnic from my dad's Spanish-Italian family. But by 16, I stopped breathing properly through my nose. I was also diagnosed with PCOS and lost 35 pounds and so many of my self esteem issues were gone from the weight loss and hormonal fix (PCOS makes you hairy and full of acne), except for my nose. Then I asked mom to take me to an ENT doctor. Just as the appointment started, the doctor asked me when I broke my nose and mom and I were like "never???". He pointed the fracture with his finger and had me do a CT scan. The CT showed how broken and crooked it was. I went through a combined septoplasty (to straighten my nose) + reconstructive rhinoplasty (to reshape my nose). I feel amazing after surgery and the doctor shaped my nose to match my face and don't look too plastic. Also, my case was so bad that the doctor (who is a teacher in medical school) asked to keep my exams to use in his class.
In my senior year in high school, a friend from a Lebanese family (with an ethnic but completely functional nose) complained about her nose and I said something, and she said I shouldn't talk about it because I was born with a perfect nose. When I told her I had a nose job and showed her the "before" pictures, she was freaked out. What is going on with plastic surgery on social media is exactly what happened with my friend, but in an even bigger scale, because 1) I admitted having surgery 2) it was literally only one person, not an entire social media trend all over the place.
Ha you guilt trip someone that pretty terrible i wouldn't gulit trip people with my dad being died oh wait i did
... wait, as a fellow PCOS sufferer, what kind of treatment did they give you? All I was ever told was that since I was not actively trying to get pregnant I should just try to lose weight (in spite of me having a history of disordered eating), and even in the periods when I did lose weight it never fixed any other symptom.
@@rosiebowers1671 I have the same problem as you, I'm fat, I have PCOS and I am addicted to sugar.
That's the purpose of cosmetic surgery in the first place: fixing unwanted deformities caused by gene or trauma so that they have a normal look. However, because of advertising, it now turns into "fixing normal look into (industrial and replicated) "perfection" and causing insecurity and the loss of uniqueness (because they want the same things according to "beauty standards")
@@rosiebowers1671 i'm guessing antiandrogens?
Hot take: mismatch ears are cute as hell. Big noses are cute as hell. Eye spacing isn't as important as you think it is for beauty. Your eyebrows and brow line probably suite you better than the current fashion. We're more attracted to HEALTHY looking hair than anything else; natural or dyed/treated/styled, if it looks healthy is going to be better than the current color or texture trend any day of the week. You're the result of thousands of generations of people selectively finding beauty in one another, that means there's something beautiful about you, it was curated to be that way.
Crooked teeth are cute too!
Babe im the result of a bunch of farmers breeding to honor the will of the lord or whatever farmers do that dont make me cute that makes me lucky not to be inbred
god that last sentence is beautiful
@@kokeru lol yeah I feel like a fair amount of history was people marrying or becoming pregnant in situations unrelated to love and beauty unfortunatelyâŠ. but I enjoy the sentiment â€ïž
I have incredibly mismatched ears, but it took about 13 years for anyone (including me) to ever notice, and nobody has spotted it on their own in the 17 years since, so it can't be that noticable to the average person.
Yes!!! I work as a teacher, I was born with a deformed jaw and they fixed it with surgery when I was 20. Personally I think it looks a bit odd, but whenever a young student mentions my jawline in a certain positive/envious way I explain that it is the result of hardworking surgeons, not something that you should expect to have naturally.
I don't think I fit the beauty standard, but being open about these things just in case is important to me. Especially to teenagers.
I just realised the things Iâm most insecure about were once the beauty standards- like I have a full oval face that I always wished it was shorter but looking at those paintings they have similar faces to me. I guess what Iâm trying to say is that no matter what at some point somewhere you were once the beauty standard.
it's just too bad we were just born in the wrong time.
I'm faceblind, so when a celebrity that I like suddenly becomes unrecognizable to me, I know they've had work done. It's a lot more than you'd think, and I totally agree that I just wish they'd be honest. Great message, Karolina!
Do you have a list? Now I'm curious!
@@Charlottee___ Beyonce was the most recent. I saw her in that Tiffany's ad, and I was like, "That's not Beyonce." Rose McGowan & Courtney Cox are much more obvious; most people can tell they've had work done. I wouldn't have recognized Selena Gomez in her new show if my mom hadn't told me it was her. I also didn't recognize Summer Glau in her post-Firefly/Serenity stuff. I'm sure there are more, but those are the ones I can think of off the top of my head.
@@rosey4exclaim omg I'm also face blind and could not recognise Adelle, Selena, Kelly Osbourne etc. Also couldn't recognise Charlize Theron with hair and a clear face because I only knew she was the woman in mad Max fury road lol. I only recognise Tom hardy by the nose. If he changed his nose I'd have no idea who he is.
Saame
@@patheticmortal373 I have zero issues with recognizing faces, and I still wouldn't have recognized Kelly Osbourne & Adelle without context. It's insane how different they look.
I wanna add a point to that:
Celebrities tend to be above average good looking people to begin with. When they do castings for example, looks is one of the key factors that the casting people look at.
So when we're talking about celebrities, it's already a hand picked selection of talented, likeable, attractive people. And if they then get jobs done, the beauty standards get raised to an even less obtainable level.
very true
But in other countries they tend to cast characters with people who fit the character, not necessarily beautiful people. Not always the case, especially now, but in general it's true.
@@kathyfaulk710 Other countries? Other than which country?
@@lotteg7508 She probably meant hollywood - hence US of A
@@lotteg7508 I meant the US.
Whatâs rough is when youâre around real people without any alterations and theyâre still absolutely stunning and youâre justâŠnot.
Oh well. Beauty is skin deep right
I didn't know I needed to hear this. As someone who loves learning about society and feminism, unattainable beauty standards is smth I'm already familiarized, but it's always handy to be remembered that, hey, I don't need to feel bad because my looks are real and not Instagram model like
And on the other side of this, working class women who do put effort into their appearance are shamed and considered vain. It's not just that there's this pressure to be "perfect," but there's pressure to be naturally perfect. I've known too many people who have gotten any work done, even if it's something small and been harassed to no end about being "fake."
I personally have received a lot of this because I tend to wear very heavy makeup, dye my hair, and wear high-end dresses. I just want to dress like some mix of a Disney villain and evil fairy princess. Often times I've got the "Oh but what do you look like without makeup?" and the "But guys like girls with natural beauty!" (Obviously ignoring the fact I'm nonbinary and gay lol). Like no I just wanna be an evil fairy princess from a Disney movie leave me alone Emma.
My own experience aside, I just hate the culture of "Look like a celebrity, but don't have the work done that celebrities do!" It's just so gross to me how frequently I see this.
I am yet to need a fuckboy named Emma but thank you for this nonetheless
Ive never noticed this, but this is so true of the way i think (about others but also about myself), you put it into words so well. Thank you, really.
Thank you for this insight! I just have a small question, because I'm really confused (and probably ignorant) and don't mean to be disrespectful: how can you be non-binary and gay at the same time? I mean, are you only attracted to other non-binary people? I'm genuinely curious
Yeah. I hate hearing pseudo feminist takes that no one will take my skills seriously because of my looks - if it's different, vivid, or just 'ditzy' looking to someone. It's so focused on...white patriarchal standards? It misses the point of body autonomy. Lmfao. It's not my fault that others are superficial and I'm unique looking, they have too much time on their hands to care.
@@xStormOfRosesx wdym?
Male celebrity aging normally
Media : "still sexy! He's a silver fox!"
Female celebrity aging normally
Media: "what's wrong with her she looks so tired"
Edit: thank you for all the likes!!
So true!
Male celebrities gotta dođđ what they gotta do to "age normally"
@@ChazoAnwah I think Chazo is saying male celebrities take steroids and testosterone. They also wear girdles, pluck their eyebrows, use makeup, dye their hair and get plastic surgery. They're not ageing normally.
@@ChazoAnwah probably true! I just think everyone is a lot more accepting of men with wrinkles and grey hair than women.
@@g00chi yes you're right, there is hate for male celebrities too but no way near the amount of pressure on women
Actually this is one of the most meaningful videos I have watched in awhile. CZcams just recommended your video and it is really thoughtful. I am glad that there are still women with great amount of subscribers who do not hide the reality of our society. Thank you!
I friggin LOVE your face. You are so pretty, AND you have character in your face. So many people are just starting to all look alike.
"The difference between a lady and a flower girl [working class role] is not how she behaves, but how she is treated."
~Eliza Doolittle
*Pygmalion* (My Fair Lady)
by George Bernard Shaw
George Bernard Shaw said that everyone should be forced to line up and justify their existence, and if they couldn't come up with a good reason to not be killed, they should be eliminated.
@@genli5603 đźwoah, thatâs an interesting concept
@@genli5603 đź I'm sure you could take that quote in a few different ways
@@genli5603 he must of worked in retail
Honestly "remember you're a peasant" is such a good mantra for when ever I'm getting mad at myself for not being walking perfection with all the nice things
And ya know, it's totally okay to be a peasant. Do I need to be rich and noble to be happy? Nah.
In my country, the peasants are mocked by the "elites" and superficial people concentratd in big cities whereas these people work hard to feed us and to propose a good and various food.
Without them, our societies collapse.
It's sad to read and hear this kind of disdain, this contempt for these people for always privileging more superficialities and artificialities, or false worldliness.
Don't ever limit your succed by the amount of money you have
i rly like this comment cuz yeah
I discovered the bs of the social constructs of beauty when depression made me underweight, and I still had a chin/neck fat and full cheeks. Doctors explaining that fat deposits in bodies depend on genes has been life-changing for me.
I saw an interview with Beauty Redefined where they talked about how pushing back against beauty standards and forgoing beauty work is a form of activism.
Not everyone has the privilege to do that, of course, but, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
Be pro woman! We look great naturally.
You also have to be careful with how they deny having surgery/procedures: "have you ever had Botox?" Celebrities will say "no" because Botox is a brand and they had a different injectable. "Have you had cosmetic surgery? "No." Because they've only had procedures (ie. Injectables, fillers, coolsculpting, microderming etc.). đ
I didn't know botox was a brand! Its used so synonymously with fillers x_x
I was today years old when I learnt that Botox isn't the procedure but the actual brand
@@syaliishi914 It's called 'genericization'! It happened with 'frisbee', 'taser', 'escalator' and a bunch of other brands haha
Lol Yes. It's semantics. Also I think it's hilarious when rich people assume that's normal for everyone. (Don Lemon *cough cough*) .....some people wouldn't do that even if they did have the money.
Oh but I agree with the rest lol it's still a procedure of course and they ( celebrities)should just admit to it đ
Even if celebrities haven't had work done, they do have professional stylists, makeup artists, hairstylists, and designer clothing tailor-made to fit them (plus often have professional paparazzi taking photos of them on thousand-dollar cameras instead of your friend with their iPhone or w/e) so of course they look more gorgeous and unattainable than you ever could. You putting in as much effort as humanly possible will never be able to match the efforts of ten different people working on a celebrity. If you don't want to believe that your favorite celebrity has had work done, that's fine, but comparing your looks to theirs is still incredibly unrealistic. Plus, I guarantee you are a beautiful human being who is gorgeous and unattainable in your own right.
Not to mention that before they do a film they will go on a drastic diet and exercise regimen to attain a silhouette that even they can't maintain for anything but short periods. And, while on those drastic diets they have a chef who prepares everything and a personal trainer motivating them all day, every day.
And then that designer clothing looks horrible with their undertone/complexion half the time anyway.
and they are still wearing shapewear on red carpet 8 times out of 10
Yep. I let myself go. And then I had my hair done in a nice salon, started wearing makeup again and did my nails. Press on nails hahaha. But they looked good! And I removed them and now I don't feel that fancy without them. Little things like that levels up your look. I found a nice coat at the thrift store and it makes me look put together. My mom has lots of seamstress friends and I plan on slowly having my clothes tailored. All these things all adds up.
This is so healing. I wish I had girlfriends like you, my God.
Oop-
I look exactly like the portrait at 6:13 and everyone has always called me gross and ugly, I guess I wasn't born in the right time
Bring poor now: you are absolutely much more concerned with feeding your kids, but your front tooth falling out is still a severe blow to your self esteem, even if you hide it.
The fact that your body is being chewed up *needlessly* by poverty is not lost on you.
Source: grew up in poverty,
Grateful to not be there anymore
Same. My teeth went back to crooked because I couldnt keep up with the after treatment of retainers after I moved out of my parents house.
@@ah5721 Same here and no I have awful sinus issues and even got aspiration pneumonia from not being able to chew food properly. Trying to get invisalign now
I think as a nurse I see how many people have so many different faces, body shapes and various scars from procedures etc. That at some point I stopped being so concerned with women who looked 'perfect' because 1) I,knew it wasn't real but also...at some point scars and things show that people survive absolute abominations and still carry themselves with dignity. To me...that's way more impressive than anything a filter or plastic surgery can do.
There is a tendency to add scars to people to indicate they are villainous or at least realistic, instead of just normalizing actors with scars the rest of us just keep as souvenirs or because we must. Thatâs an easy thing to change, casting directors!
It is real. Ana de Armas and Emilia Clarke are real people and more beautiful than you.
Imagine dudes complaining about Jason Momoa or Leonardo DiCaprio.
@@MrCmon113 Ana de Armas and Emilia Clarke exist, yes, and Iâm sure they are very beautiful naturally. But every picture we see of them is photoshopped, retouched and airbrushed to perfection. So no, I wouldnât call it real. Same goes for male celebrities, of weâre being honest, although there is less of a focus on youth.
This comment just lifted me. I have self injury scars which I call my âproof of the fight I fought and wonâ but this one doctor told me it was âstupidityâ (yes, in 2022, not 1522. I live in the Middle East, if I had plastic surgery scars, he wouldâve been fine with it! ). I canât do much about this doctor due to the weird culture here but I wanted to write to him and educate him because Iâm strong now but other patients might be in the middle of their fight. Your comment just gave me that extra push to stand up for fighters so thank you very much â€ïž
i mean i have to disagree. The percentages of plastic surgery is not very high, and in addition to that- even if no one on Earth did plastic surgery, would that make a different? Should we in that case have been concerned about looking good? Whether or not people enhance themselves doesn't change that fundamental truth.
Beauty standards are ridiculously toxic, at this point I do judge the models and the celebrities who make it their entire lives to conform to them and by extension encourage other people to do so.
I greatly appreciate how your rants are more polite, more analytical, and more humorous than other people's loud, belligerent, unproductive opinions. I also appreciate your humorous and accurate comparison of today's internet viewers to 17th Century peasants visiting an art gallery.
This might go under the points you already made, celebrity's seem to also be treated like crap in some media when they don't live up to "the beauty standards". "Omg, that's what she looks like without make-up?" "Wow, he really need to hit the gym" "What happend, they really let themselves down!" Etc.
I've even seen people saying things like "this celebrity should fix their nose, they have enough money for it" only to turn around and blame the celebrity for getting work done. People suck sometimes
Yeah, it's super annoying every time I see tabloids doing that. They're half the problem. Leave them alone and they won't feel the need for these surgeries.
Heck, Adele and Rebel Wilson both got harrassed by media and fans for LOSING weight. People put way too much stock into celebs' looks.
@@jhardman1876 yeah it makes me confused sometimes. People bullied others for having "undesireable" features and when they fixed it, they were still bullied because it's not natural.
Even for people who aren't ultra wealthy, just the upper middle class in many countries, they have lower stress levels that come with financial stability. More access to minor cosmetic procedures like laser resurfacing, botox, and dermatologists. Better neighborhoods, free from pollutants, higher quality food, the list goes on and on. I am peasant pretty and that's okay.
Peasant pretty!!! Poetry, pure poetry.
Me too, btw
PEASANT PRETTY I LOVE THIS!!!!!
Yet people insist that money wonât make you happy. It wonât but it will make me well-fed, healthy (because healthcare) less anxious and yeah then I can afford to literally fix my body face it I please.
Sis if the woman in the pic is you you're not peasant pretty you're pretty, period.
@@asew4897 Someone said it. Amen
That's one of the reasons why I love a Brazilian pop star called Anitta. She's had several surgeries but never denied anything, she tells everybody that she wasn't born like that and people shouldn't compare their natural faces to her 20 procedures.
Her latest album cover has all her different "faces" from the surgeries she had and she said that she was happy with how she looked, but she just wanted to change and there is nothing wrong being honest about having surgeries and wanting to look different
Karolina: I have never met people that look that good.
You know, the symmetry, the right proportions...
Also Karolina: Is Karolina.
When I think of my beloved grandmother, and the toll that poverty early in life and lifelong backbreaking labour left on her, and then look at my cousin (who is the spitting image of her) who recently turned 55, but grew up with modern medicine and enough food to eat and an education and a desk job etc, it is CLEAR that being poor is hard on your looks. My gran was always beautiful, but my cousin looks younger at 55 than gran did at 35.
@A H that's so true I was a caregiver for my parents for 10 years my looks changed drasticly it's stress not having finance for extra help.
@A H Yeah, people always think I'm in my late 20's but I'm almost 40. I really think it's because I don't have chindren. The moms I know, they usually look really tired, I admire them so much. And of course if the kid has disabilities, there is so much work to do, so they look even more tired.
@@juliapalos2077 Same here. Almost 40, people think I'm 25-30. No husband, no kids. I also attribute it to the fact that I never tanned.
@@bethanyb4478 sorry you definitely look your age in the face if thats you in the photo. But still beautiful at 40.
So very true. So little understood. I see my grandmother, from Cork, in the 1920s, 15 pregnancies and 11 live children. She looked 50 at 34. No money, no heating and little hope, plus a lot of alcoholism and violence. Her kids all left home at 14, 15 yo to get work and she didn't see most of them again because they joined the Irish diaspora. It was gruelling and we cannot imagine what living it was like. Then came welfare, health care, sanitation and support for women, birth control and eventually, the right for a Irish women to use it. Difference is phenomenal.
This made me think of an interview with Jaime Lee Curtis in which she says that we have lost a generation of beauty because of how prevalent plastic surgery has become. It made me think about all the movies & films I have seen where the âmomâ character resembles none of the moms I have ever seen or known. But further than that, I wonder what effect it has sociologically to see the emotion of storytelling on faces that have been surgically altered. Does it influence how we relate to the people around us? Does it alter our ability to experience empathy or sympathy?
very interesting questions, would love it if someone made a video about it. Like Khadija Mbowe, her analyisis are the best.
This is very interesting thought!
Not to mention that Hollywood is so allergic to aging women that it's quite common to see mothers that are either impossibly close in age to their supposed children, or possibly even younger the their supposed children!
thatâs so interesting!! iâd love to know if any research has been done on those
Just to be clear, there isnât research by into this that I am aware of. I suspect that it would be a difficult study to accomplish with scientific rigor.
Transparency aside, Iâm pretty ambivalent to celebrities (or anyone) getting plastic surgery but what really breaks my heart is when they erase their ethnic features-traits that show their heritage, and end up looking like a carbon copy of each other. Itâs mainly noses. Countless celebs with Jewish, Arab, Eastern European, etc heritage but youâd never be able to tell unless you look at their before photos. Noses tell so much story, and then everyone in Hollywood just shaves down that heritage to an English upturned nose and itâs just heartbreaking.
Thank you for this videos about beauty standards! This is what I've been telling people for years, that beauty depends on the era and place they live in. It's not something real, it's imagined. And no one believes me. You explained this so well! I'm deff gonna link back to you from my Insta. Thank you! â€ïž And you're beautiful, btw. đ
"How did all those people in paintings have such perfect skin?"
"They had this filter called "I'm the one paying you"
I also hate it when people try to correlate aging with morals. "Oh, she aged like milk, it's because she's mean, serves her right!" "Oh, she hasn't aged in 10 years, that's what happens when you stay in your lane!" Like. No. It's what happens when you get botox and plastic surgery done by professionals who can make it look as natural as possible. Even male celebrities do that despite it being seen as a feminine thing. And you don't even have to be rich (not to mention celebrity rich) to afford it. My own mother has botox and permanent makeup, looks noticeably younger, and no one suspects a thing.
Well, I mean, as an amateur aritst myself, it's way easier to draw/paint people with smooth glowy skin than uneven flawed skin that has wrinkles, scars, pimples, hair whatever. So why do something that not only takes more time and effort but will make the client unhappy just to be a bit more realistic
Omg thank you! Itâs like people want to believe that all people that are ugly on the inside will also age badly and be ugly on the outside, and that if someone ages better and appears physically beautiful, than that means theyâre a better person. Stuff like that is why I had to stop using Twitter tbh. As someone who has had body image issues since I was 14, reading all those kinds of things said about who I think, are beautiful celebrities, made me think... wow if this person thinks the model looks ugly, what must I look like:(
There are two portraits of Queen Victoria. One a photo. The other an oil. Very different looking. Also, for most people botox is still unaffordable.
@@dawnelder9046 I'm no expert, but looking at those photos, it seems like they're still retouched (which could be done back then by painting on the negatives, for example). In some places the skin texture just disappears into a blur, especially in places where the wrinkles disappear or the hair somehow fades into the skin.
Also, I never said botox is affordable for everyone. Just that it's not exclusively celebrities or super rich people who can have access to it, and if it's done well, people will most likely not notice.
@@sheeana7968 why smoothen out flaws just cus its easier? They may like it in the moment, but they'll go home and look in the mirror. Then go through the whole mental stress of comparing themselves to a painting
When I was a teenager I hated my appearance but I was way too lazy to do anything about it do I just sort of... accepted it??? and now i love the way i look so moral of the story is the key to self love is laziness thanks for coming to my ted talk
Same girl!!! I literally can't bother to care as much as I did in the past and love that for me
Lol people be like: whatâs youâre skincare routine?? How is your hair so soft??
Me: âŠ.What if I told you I *donât* scrub/spray my face and hair with a myriad of products?
Makes people mad. Everyoneâs skin and hair is different, but what works for me is no makeup, natural soap and water in the shower, natural lotion as needed đ€·ââïž And it doubly works for me because I just canât be bothered to do anything else lol
@@ohrats731 I like doing skincare stuff, but sometimes i'll forget and go a good 2 months not doing it, just washing my face in the shower cause honestly ain't nobody got time for that
Lol yeah. 15y ago I was considered ugly with my small waist, big hips/thighs. But I realized 50% of people have to be uglier than average, so it's not that weird to be on the latter side of this proverbial coin anyway. So I just accepted it and got on with my life.
Now I'm a model!
@@joyruppert4710 love that for you!! đđđđ
Thank you, Karolina. This is why I've completely avoided social media these past few years. I grew up with body dysmorphia, and I'm sad to see the new generation discovering what it feels like to not recognise their own face in a digitally enhanced selfie, because that's what I live with every day. The only way I could cope with our increasingly vain, "always online" world was by tuning out, and I heartily recommend the same to other women who've noticed a decline in their mental health from social media use.
I had a boob job when I was 21. Thing was, I already had big breasts; I was just insecure they were too saggy. The surgery was done badly on the cheap in a foreign country, and now that I'm super poor and struggling to make rent on a student's budget, I wonder whether I'll ever be able to afford to have my breasts fixed. I wonder if I'll ever find a husband. 30 is too young to be telling other women "don't make my mistake", but there you have it.
"Comparison is the thief of joy." After a lifetime of envy and anguish and loneliness, I'm working hard to make that a core value.
Marlene Dietrich, one of the most beautiful women of the twentieth century, had breasts that sagged naturally.
Another big difference between now and the 17th century? We have mirrors and cameras. Mirrors weren't accessible to most people until way into the industrial revolution, and cameras weren't until literally the last ten years or so. People have the ability to observe, scrutinise, and criticise their appearance way more than they did before.
Thank you for this video and thank you for putting proper captions on it, it really helps me and my funky speech processing. đ
"You look like a regular 2021 model, but it's 1667 and no one cares."
This reminds me of the time I went to my family doctor to ask him if he could help me lose weight and his answer was "Don't worry about that. In the 17th century, your body type was the beauty ideal and all the men would have wanted you." And I thought "That's nice, but unfortunately we live in the twenty-first century and baroque is no longer in fashion." đŹ
Edit: By "unfortunately we live in the twenty-first century" I don't mean that I would rather have lived in a previous century. Just to be clear. Big fan of running water, antibiotics, education, voting rights, etc.
It sounds like he was meaning well, but it still feels really dismissive to be told that, especially from a male doctor.
Looking pretty should be the last thing a doctor thinks about when it comes to a patient's health. He prioritised how appealing you are to him over how your health, which is đŹ
@@patheticmortal373 you may not have gotten his point. It seems like she didn't have any underlying conditions because of her weight, and she was healthy as it is.
So, he made a point of saying that it's all up to beauty standards, that don't matter.
@@CorHellekin the thing is if she's come to the doctor about her health he should talk about her health. There could be a family history or unknown condition under the surface that isn't discovered because a doctor thought the patient was sexier, but it doesn't matter how she looks. It's unprofessional and potentially dangerous. Not to mention it's very common for male doctors to ignore women's health issues based on arbitrary opinions of the doctor. It should be about fat percentage, distribution, blood results, joint pain or lack of, endocrinology etc. Where does "I think you're sexy already" fall into that.
@@CorHellekin then he should have said "as your doctor I'm not concerned about your weight for health reasons" - remaking on a patient's attractiveness is at *best* unprofessional and mildly inappropriate, and at worst skeezy as hell
Isnât it a strange coincidence that just as makeup gurus became popular and good quality products became cheaper that suddenly it all became about âself careâ? That now we pretend that itâs because of a serum or special health drink that our favorite celebrities look flawless?
Money money money đČ
Very interesting perspective!
They just rebranded cosmetics as being part of self love but they are literally just trying to sell you something. That's it. All it ever was. Buy my shit, be less ugly. Spend your hard earned money on dumb shit.
I love makeup, it's super fun to play around with, but never forget that their are no benevolent intentions behind the industry. They literally just want your money and they'll convince you to spend every way they can.
More than likely ( Airbrush)đ
I never understood why self care meant giving two shits about your appearance instead of actually caring about your actual health
I remember a reading rainbow (?) episode where they interviewed a fashion model. At first she's just a normal looking person. No makeup. No fancy clothes, etc.
Then they go through the process to get her runway ready.
They entire time she emphasizes that yes, everyone thinks she and other celebrities look pretty, but it takes a lot of work to achieve that "perfection" and it's all an illusion.
I totally agree with/love this video. Another thought I had when you were talking about âhow many people do you know that are just âtake your breath awayâ beautiful?â: nowadays, people who ARE those one in a hundred gorgeous people are very likely to become influencers and gain a platform where weâre again bombarded with their images. So even worse than hundred of years ago because then even in the wealthy circles youâd likely have a more natural mix of gorgeous and average looking people. Whereas nowadays if you have a platform, you ARE going to be gorgeous 99% of the time because that level of beauty (whether natural or obtained through wealth) is a prerequisite to having a platform.
I hate that normal people are being told to âage gracefullyâ too. Like you donât think being rich helped Jennifer Aniston look so good?? Some people are gonna age quicker or look older than others. I once heard someone say âshe aged so well because sheâs unproblematicâ like nah, she is just lucky genetically or rich. Donât let aging scare you! Youâre gonna get wrinkles, youâre gonna get sun spots, youâre gonna sag, youâre gonna gain and lose weight, itâs all normal! Also, cough cough, khloe Jenner talking about how lazy fat people are when she literally got her body through surgery, access to high quality personal training, and meals made FOR her.
A lot of celebs actually look like they've aged in reverse! đ đ€Ł đ
But Jennifer Aniston uses Aveeno! That's her secret! Haven't you seen the commercials?? (lollllllll)
Right, by "aging gracefully" they mean they want you to still look good without obvious plastic surgery and caked on makeup. But that requires hella expensive skincare products, regular facials, subtle plastic surgery, etc. It's not natural at all.