EP 039 - Ten Conversations to Have Before Marriage, Emotional Intelligence - Shaykh Navaid Aziz

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  • čas přidán 18. 10. 2019
  • Ustadh Shabbir is joined by Shaykh Navaid Aziz who discusses the perils of social media, what conversations to have when choosing a spouse.
    ---
    Shaykh Navaid Aziz is a Canadian Muslim public figure with a diverse academic and social background. He was raised in Montreal, Quebec where he completed a diplome d’etudes collegiales in social sciences from Champlain College. He then proceeded to the Islamic University of Madinah, where he completed an Associate’s Degree in the Arabic Language and a Bachelors in Islamic Law.
    Upon returning home to Canada, Navaid began teaching for Al-Maghrib Institute. He has since transitioned to their Director of Public Relations. During this period, he volunteered as the Islamic Editor for Little Explorers Magazine and began his work as a family and youth counselor. It was also during this time that he established himself as a sought-after public speaker. He has lectured across five continents and over 20 countries thus far.
    In 2012, Navaid moved to Calgary, Alberta to become the Director of Religious and Social Services for the Islamic Information Society of Calgary, a position he currently holds. In Calgary his youth counseling work extended further to include helping in the mitigation of criminal radicalization. This included the creating and implementation of holistic youth programming which included civic engagement opportunities, volunteer programs at the local shelters, community cleanups, tree planting days, and blood drives amongst other things.
    In 2015, Navaid became the first ever Muslim chaplain with the Calgary Police Services. Through his involvement with CPS he consulted in the development of their world-renowned ReDirect program. In 2018, Navaid also joined the Organization for the Prevention of Violence in Alberta as a programming and intervention coordinator. His focus remains on increasing education, literacy, and dialogue through multiple communities.
    Navaid’s free time is spent exploring local eateries, traveling, and hiking the Canadian Rockies. He is also known to enjoy playing basketball and hosting game nights-with Monopoly and Cranium being his favorites.
    To read more about Navaid or his community engagement please go to www.NavaidAziz.com
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Komentáře • 70

  • @ilmfeed
    @ilmfeed  Před 4 lety +19

    New here? Be sure to subscribe for more podcasts like this.

    • @afaisal91
      @afaisal91 Před 4 lety +1

      Assalamu alaikum, I have one humble suggestion. Why don't you guys make short videos clip out of these podcast which speaks about the subject so we don't have to watch the whole podcast? Jazak allah khair

    • @ilmfeed
      @ilmfeed  Před 4 lety +1

      We do. Check the playlist called IlmFeed Podcast Clips

  • @anneeq008
    @anneeq008 Před 4 lety +85

    Marriage discussion starts at 22:20

  • @HamzaQadeer
    @HamzaQadeer Před 4 lety +47

    22:17 - 10 Conversations you should have before marriage
    23:20 - Question engineering
    24:18 - The Past
    25:20 - The Future
    27:15 - The Deen
    30:00 - The Family
    30:48 - Finances
    31:54 - The Kids
    33:24 - Friends
    35:10 - Expectations
    36:56 - Habits & Hobbies
    37:14 - Health

  • @afiahoquechowdhury
    @afiahoquechowdhury Před 4 lety +35

    (Little attempt to point them out here,If mistaken kindly tell me so that I can alter )
    1. Do you pray?
    2. What's your goal and plan for future?
    3.What's your understanding of Deen and where are you now ( How you are maintaining Deen now or to what extent) and where do you want to go?
    4. Family ( It's broader aspect to recount such as how the family would run , whether spouse is supposed to reside with in laws or cook for them or how much responsibility spouse is expected to undertake for in laws.
    5. Finances. What's is job of your partner? ( You can look through whether the income source is halal or haram) For wife's part, what does she like? To work or to stay at home?
    6. Kids. ( about their upbringing, sharing of responsibilities of them , schooling in Islamic environment or public school?
    7. Friends. ( You have to inquire who are he/she friends with since "you are likely to be your friends consist of".
    8. Expectation. ( about expectation derived from both )
    9. Habit and hobby.
    10. Health issue.

  • @codedaily409
    @codedaily409 Před 4 lety +13

    Another good conversation I thought of was: what is your typical week like?

  • @shaguftahramtally2291
    @shaguftahramtally2291 Před 4 lety +17

    Asalamualaikum akhi
    Your podcasts are amazing
    Keep up with the good work
    BarakAllah feek

  • @LearnArabicMSA
    @LearnArabicMSA Před 4 lety +10

    Mashaa Allah !! Well done : as usual !!
    Make sure to watch the whole podcast even if you are married: you can still save someone else's life by passing these messages on ^__^

  • @alimal-haqq7758
    @alimal-haqq7758 Před 4 lety +1

    masha allah may allah preserve brother navaid aziz a truly gem of our times masha allah keep the videos coming doing a great job talking to truly inspirational people masha allah !!

  • @reciterrahma3276
    @reciterrahma3276 Před 3 lety +2

    Subhan’Allahi wa bihamdihi Subhan’Allahil Azweem❤️
    Subhan’Allah❤️
    Alhamdu lillah❤️
    Laa ilaaha illaa Allah❤️
    Allahu Akbar❤️
    Laa hawla wa laa kuwwata illaa billah❤️
    May peace and blessings of Allah be upon our beloved prophet his companions and entire household❤️

  • @1ShabbirHassan
    @1ShabbirHassan Před 4 lety +6

    Great tips from the legend that is Shaykh Navaid! 😀

  • @hayaaahmed2299
    @hayaaahmed2299 Před 4 lety

    Ma shaa Allah jazakAllah sheikh...may Allah swt bless you and all of us ameen..by the way sheikh is soo cute and have noor on his face🙂..ma shaa Allah ..stay happy and blessed ameen

  • @aasmahalima5245
    @aasmahalima5245 Před 3 lety +2

    Such a great podcast. I am now getting my clipboard ready to write down my questions for marriage. Jzk :)

  • @ibraheembeshir6808
    @ibraheembeshir6808 Před 4 lety +2

    I agree and don't at the same time with the Shaykh about marrying a spouse that doesn't pray their 5 (mandatory prayers) because that can cause the other spouse to do the same. Were I agree is that interactions with Muslim people that practice their Iman is very easy when their are a group of people together in 1 place. I also think that the intentions in the prays (ie perfecting prayer) is something that majority of the Muslims are struggling with in this day and age.

  • @0xdew
    @0xdew Před 4 lety +3

    Aslmwlkm, sh navaid did a wonderful lecture last year covering these questions and he had a document he shared(unfortunately I no longer have it) but itd be great if you could ask him and upload it. I’m sure many people would benefit

  • @pineezo
    @pineezo Před 4 lety +4

    Watching from the Philippines.

  • @phoenixknight8837
    @phoenixknight8837 Před 3 lety

    Jazakumallahu khayran wa barakallahu feekum!

  • @bohali9595
    @bohali9595 Před 4 lety

    MashaAllah, great podcast.

  • @batu2000
    @batu2000 Před 4 lety

    JazakAllahu khayran

  • @somebody2310
    @somebody2310 Před 2 lety +2

    The brother has made good points and given good advice. I am going to have to dis agree with him @ 27:24 . We have to marry people for where they are and have good thoughts that they will become better. Although I think thats what he meant. It may not have come out right.

  • @sumasouf5208
    @sumasouf5208 Před 4 lety +9

    The book mentioned at 43:22
    With the Heart in Mind | The Moral & Emotional Intelligence of the Prophet ﷺ
    By: Mikaeel Ahmed Smith
    Does anyone know where to get it from in the UK?

    • @zaemaref
      @zaemaref Před 4 lety +1

      You can check in qalam.foundation/books
      Or meccabooks.com

  • @vaseem255
    @vaseem255 Před 4 lety

    Ultimate pod cast..

  • @yusrarahman5400
    @yusrarahman5400 Před 3 lety

    I absolutely agree with the discussion on social media. I have deleted Snapchat as well.

  • @farhiyaa4880
    @farhiyaa4880 Před 3 lety +9

    I disagree with 27 minutes..marrying someone for their potential. There is no certainty that the person will change. How many sisters married a man for his potential and it goes unfulfilled. You have to see them as they are right now and decide if it works for you.

  • @misss3461
    @misss3461 Před 2 lety

    I watch his Quran tafseer specifically Juzz Amma. Soo goood allahumma barik

  • @susanmayor6449
    @susanmayor6449 Před 3 lety

    Your video is very cool. I truly think that emotional intelligence can help with anything! #coacheq2020

  • @rbtonatoni6455
    @rbtonatoni6455 Před 4 lety

    mashllah

  • @ranaldojunior6455
    @ranaldojunior6455 Před 4 lety +7

    FreeLebanon#

  • @johnsala5330
    @johnsala5330 Před 4 lety +3

    Salam, who should I have these conversations with? I watched the entire video, interesting but trying to figure out the personal application...any advice is appreciated.

    • @LnahS
      @LnahS Před 4 lety +1

      with your potential spouse @ 22:50

    • @johnsala5330
      @johnsala5330 Před 4 lety +3

      @@LnahS InshaAllah ok I'll have to find a potential spouse.

    • @johnsala5330
      @johnsala5330 Před 4 lety +1

      @@LnahS how do I find a potential spouse to discuss this with? I've only been a revert for 8 years, so nobody has told me yet, just "have sabar, tawakkul, make dua, coming soon" but no practical advice, now I'm 45 and getting younger, the brothers at the masjid say they really care and are quite hopeful that my sabar & tawakkul pays off, now 8 years on I'm losing hope a little that this is the most effective method. Anyway, never too old to start a family, maybe 5-10 years more to have sabar and hopefully I'll get those years back too.

    • @johnsala5330
      @johnsala5330 Před 4 lety

      @@LnahS I think that realising that nobody cares is very liberating

    • @LnahS
      @LnahS Před 4 lety

      @@johnsala5330 لا تَقْنَطُوا مِن رَّحْمَةِ اللَّهِ.
      Brother, don't despair of Allah's mercy. Sometimes we want something and it's not better for us and sometimes we don't like something it is better. And Allah knows.
      Trust Him. Make loads of dua in sajdah during prayer. Offer Tahhajud, increase your Istighfar.
      Contact local people who can maybe help you like the imam of a masjid or similar people. Sign up to religious matrimony websites like purematrimony.com.
      May Allah make is easy for you and give you a spouse that shall be the coolness of your eyes. Aameen.

  • @piqueny8872
    @piqueny8872 Před 4 lety +4

    The elder generations 99% of marriages have lasted till death was because they married early, so less tempted zina adultary ect ect
    they had the same idea of life
    So wife automatically becomes housewife lives with in-laws, had kids, husband worked paid for everything
    Same culture same lineage same rules same concepts of life.
    These days the youth ummah are more knowledgable so they are following sunnah and fard rather than
    Backwards idol forefathers worship made up Ideology.
    The new generations are Using intellect, mercy, compassion, communication and the hadiths to determine halal from haram.
    This is why it’s become difficult finding an honest god fearing worshipping spouse.

    • @piqueny8872
      @piqueny8872 Před 4 lety

      My bad success was not the right word
      These days married fail bcuz
      Ppl acting like dogs fuck the closes thing in range then catch a disease or get an abortion cry what life is shit and messed up
      Die of drugs or overdose or drunk dead or in jail
      No The 1st generations married they worshiped idols this why why divorce was taboo back then and. A Husband rape his wife as her being obedient to him! Abuse of every kind was used and played this is why they stayed not happiness but mostly force
      However some success some not

  • @vaseem255
    @vaseem255 Před 4 lety

    Akhi what is the name of book 📙 sheikh Michael

  • @gulofern3858
    @gulofern3858 Před 4 lety

    just vs merciful??
    what excites about future
    where in Deen.. prefer progressive potential
    expectations about family
    finances wife wanna work??
    kids upbringing
    friends peeeeeeeett peeves
    expectations wife responsibilities
    habits.. hobbies..
    health

  • @MBAZ1961
    @MBAZ1961 Před 10 měsíci

    Subhana allah, sheikh ibn othaimine said : don’t expect spouse to change marry them for what they r!! So how come a person marries someone who doesn’t pray 5 times!! And see any type of potential in that spouse?!?! Crazy adviiiiice!
    Especially in today’s world, where islam doesn’t come first,
    The prophet pbuh ordered parents to teach their kids to pray at 7 n hit them at 10 n nowadays someone who’s in his or her 20 /30 not praying for decades; might have a potential!!!! A potential of what exactly!?!? Failing big time?!?!

  • @jeremyh9213
    @jeremyh9213 Před 4 lety +5

    It's concerning if someone is not praying 5 times a day. I wouldn't marry off my daughter to such a bum. If he can't fulfill Allah's rights then he's less likely to fulfill hers. It's not even hard to pray, this tells you a lot about someone.

    • @soomascorner
      @soomascorner Před 4 lety +1

      Jeremy H same. This is the one part where I disagree with him. Especially bc as Muslim women we are not allowed to marry non Muslim men. What is the difference between a ‘Muslim’ who doesn’t pray and a non Muslim. So that’s one thing I can’t settle with 😊

    • @jeremyh9213
      @jeremyh9213 Před 2 lety

      @بنت عبد الله
      Its not about if they have potential. One either prays or doesn't

  • @vaseem255
    @vaseem255 Před 4 lety

    Example of camel 🐫 is superb

  • @TheBatman2022DC
    @TheBatman2022DC Před 4 lety +5

    Hello

    • @ilmfeed
      @ilmfeed  Před 4 lety +12

      Hi Bruce Kent

    • @TheBatman2022DC
      @TheBatman2022DC Před 4 lety +3

      @@ilmfeed my names not bruce and I'm not from kent you've got me confused with someone else

    • @ilmfeed
      @ilmfeed  Před 4 lety +10

      Hi Clarke Wayne

    • @TheBatman2022DC
      @TheBatman2022DC Před 4 lety +4

      @@ilmfeed oh lol I get it omg 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @loveneverends9605
      @loveneverends9605 Před 4 lety

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @timelessreminders
    @timelessreminders Před 8 měsíci

    Definition 41:30:00