I Got Trapped in a Denny’s Bathroom + Black Friday Riots
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- čas přidán 11. 12. 2023
- Come see me live:
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Check out joshjohnsoncomedy.com/tour for more dates!
Hey Friends, wanted to share part of my set from Arlington Drafthouse. Share your thoughts with me in the comments.
If you love my stories I have a podcast that comes out every week: bit.ly/3NQmpio
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Drop a comment if you loved or hated the set, and especially if you're unsure. Subscribe for more. Thanks for being my friends!
Directed by Eric Shepard - Komedie
Hi Friends! Thank you all for watching. Make sure to subscribe. Upcoming shows in New Jersey, Burlington, Stamford CT. www.joshjohnsoncomedy.com/tour for tix
I usually love your stuff, but you could have deleted the first 15 minutes of this 17 minute video.
Hi friends???!!😂😂😂😂
You are a great comedian, not many that can make me burst out w laughter the way u do.I could listen to u for hours.
Thank you!
I had a bad day and you mde me laugh the entire time. Thank you so much. (I m very appreciative 😀) Also, when you make the gesture when reaching for the toilet paper and you just stare straight ahead...your expression is priceles :D
@@Sylph70 Did Josh jog some memories of you getting your ass beat on Black Friday or some bad toilet paper experiences?, I sense some stress in your comment😂
Don't shame the person who tells you the toilet paper is out. They are saving the next person.
They are a martyr for the cause
I had someone call me while on the toilet to tell me we were out of toilet paper in our restroom 😂😂😂😂
@@asiawest1973 Fuken brilliant lmao
They are making me think they have an incomplete wipe
I mean, this is exactly my thought on how best to deal with this. Of course, I usually check to make sure there is adequate roll before I commit, so I can't say I've ever had to deal with this before...
As someone who worked 20 years of retail... I HATE BLACK FRIDAY!!!! I have so many stories, but the one that comes to mind is one year at Walmart I got pinned to a shelf with a complete stranger next to the electronics section because of the sheer number of people trying to get to the department. We just silently stared into each other's eyes thinking to one another "We will get through this." I worked produce people!
lol, that's heinous. Hope you have a Merry Christmas this year!
Walmart? Years ago? That was me!
How you been doing
😂😂😂😂😂😂
@archmage_of_the_aether Oh, thank God you made it out alive! ☺️
electronics next to produce? i call shenanigans.
A lesson you only need to learn ONCE. always ALWAYS check for toilet paper before you sit down
Or squat 4 dear life 😂😂😂😂😂
ALWAYS.
That's why older ladies carry so many tissues in their handbag.
@@annainspain5176 I have a pocket full of tissue wherever I go. It's not just for the toilet, all it takes is one bad sneeze and it's a whole lotta mess. 😂
Or always have a pack of kleenex in your pocket
This dude is delivering content that's better than a lot of people's specials just because it's Tuesday.
Especially the last ones of Rocky 🥊 Gervais, who was only punching down and even Chapelle was dissapointing, he really needs to get off the LGBTQ jokes, coz now it's a pattern and whatever happened to pinching up, like a Katt Williams or in the old days George Carlin, my favorite white stand up comedian!! The best ones never get a special, it's a fake business and lots of the Comedians we know (Kevin Hart, Cedric the Entertainer, Will Smith, Steve Harvey, Chris Tucker and others) and who never did the stand up gigs the real ones do, that's why Katt has outed them all in a few interviews on here, like Shay ... (?) for not writing their own material to them being a group, who tried to black ball Katt ao comedians, weird stories abt P. Diddy, who send Hakeem Jeffries from Empire to Will fit mentoring and he left the house screaming and went into a very dark path afterwards and his career is over. This year Katt's gonna expose them all and I'm taking a front seat!🍿🥤😅
@@Boadicea6 Geezuss dude, I was just bigging up Josh. If you wanna write a dissertation do it on your own comment, not as a reply to mine. 🙄
@@celestialnubian I know I get a bit too exited on here sometimes, doesn't mean you have to be rude about, you don't have to read it! So be a bit nicer and don't respond at all or come with some building criticism!!
I love when Josh says “I’ll be vulnerable for a second” and then he followed it with a Denny’s story 😂
I think it's because there's a folk saying that goes "the route to a man's heart is through his stomach".
I think that was the greatest story ever told.
I worked at Walmart in 2009 on black Friday. I saw a lady hop over a counter like she was in the Olympics to get a flat screen TV. It was insane!
😂😂😂
@@fatalityrecordsmusicproduc462 smh lol it was insane
Was she an OLYMPIAN
Did yall hear the story about woman chains herself to SNEAKER STORE, 2023 she got arrested
@@deep153 yeah I hear about it
See, this is why women like me carry around our packs of tissue paper. Women's bathrooms run out of toilet paper so often you have to carry that emergency supply! 😅
Yep or have soggy cookies😂😂
Yeaaa carry napkins to clean seat and sit down, tissues to wipe
Yep. Taught my 3 older daughters to always carry feminine wipes. You NEVER know when you'll need them.
I carry baby wipes. Buy the small packs so they'll fit in your purse or fold a couple up and put them in a ziplock bag.
I carry wipes, and hoard napkins😂
Yeah, the ladies room is a war scene. You need a tampon? She's got your back. We're going into battle together.
"A hundred plus three hundred minus twelve equals bricks..." Brilliant. Love your stuff Josh.
😂 I laughed again just reading this.
Just FYI: these days the good deals don't even happen on Black Friday anymore. BF is just the leftover shit that they reprice to make it look lower. The actual deals are 2 weeks before.
Thanks for the tip.
There was only one deal on black friday deal as far as i was aware. Target took $150 off PS5's, shits were gone at 6 am. Technically it was the model Sony said they weren't producing anymore but the disc model's just better anyway.
@@Zevox144 Right, it's always some leftover bs. I think the only deal I missed was on my processor. I could have for sure saved like ~$60 on that setup, but that's also because I didn't need the overclocked Ryzen 5 (the overclocking is pointless on those as they already turbo up to 5ghz)
This is always what it was. A chance for the manufacturers to get rid of stock in prep for the next season. Any sale, that is what it is about, no matter what the timing. If it looks cheaper, it's because they been lying throughout the year and no one notices.! The UK folk looked at Americans doing the BF thing and always thought it was insane. Until that influential culture a few years ago somehow got on a plane a flew over and WE have it now? Why? 😆🤣🤣🤣🤣
January before inventory is usually when I find the best deals. But that doesn't work as well for Christmas.
First rule of going to the bathroom always check if there is toilet paper. 😂
Have you been so pressed you forgot to check? Been there!😢
The way his hands was fiddling in the air had me DEAD. Josh got funny ass fingers that just adds to the hilarity.
He said 2006, 😂😂😂 I remember Tickle Me Elmo in the late 90's.
Cabbage Patch dolls. 80s
Theras so much footage of folks getting trampled in the 80s and 90s I was like youngsta....
Scrooowlled for this comment lol. I remember it in the 90s!
My people!
It's ok, kids young. He didn't have control of when he was born. 😂
That's when I started paying attention to world events 😂😂😂 I was like what's the big deal? I'm like 7 and it's not that serious!
I was talking to my friend during Black Friday at the mall about this. I literally said "I bet no one here is going to the hospital."
Dude, you set is getting so tight. You really are doing the work. I am not only entertained by your work but I am happy to see you level the fuck up!🖖🏾
"I went to the bathroom and then I went to the bathroom" is a weirdly good line
I promise you the audio doesn't do this clip justice. There were the most sincere tears from laughing when he was telling that Denny's story! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I remember years ago people were frying turkeys waiting in line for Black Friday 😂
😂That is wild! Lmao!
A forgone Era 😅😅😅😅 Kids today don’t even know 😂
That "we've been to the moon" in reference to inconvenient toilet paper rolls😂
Had a rough day, been sick, just got off my second job and was looking for something to watch with my dinner. Almost choked on my food several times but it was worth it. Made my day! The bathroom bit was too funny 🤣 Please don’t ever stop doing comedy!!!!
I feel you on 2nd job….Not easy working two jobs on a daily basis. The stress lowers our immune system and we end up getting sick. Hope u get better soon….Hang in there.
@@angelrivera9227 I really appreciate those kind words and thank you!! ❤️These moments are temporary (hopefully) and health is the most important thing. Stay safe as well!!!
Please don’t choke 😮
So random but i hope you get better ❤ and rememeber to be grateful for the little things and stay hydrated!
wrong move...if you drinking water, drowning would a hazard, also... seriously glad your alright 😅😅😅👍🙏✌️
I’m still confused why Josh and Roy Wood Jr aren’t the co-hosts of the Daily Show yet. What is Comedy Central even doing?
From your "mouth" to The Daily Show's "ears"! I would be addicted!!
Agreed that Josh should co-host. I prefer Jordan Klepper or Kal to join him.
because its a propaganda outfit where you are paid to say what they want you to say
Roy has officially passed on the job.
Dulce Sloan is already there...they could kill it as hosts for the Daily Show as Hold Up shows. Soft spot for Ronny Cheng too or Klepper if it's all sausage.
“You would get your shit rock’d!”
😂😂😂😂😂
I worked at Walmart when I was in college. Got into a fight over a Barbie corvette. Fun times!
I'm in stitches on the bus with tears rolling down my face. Some one asked if I was ok. All I could get out is "Josh Johnson... Comedian". Passenger replied with the only chuckle, " Oh I understand". 🤣🤣🤣🤩
Calling the empty toilet paper roll 'raw'... omg 🤣I had tears from laughing so hard!
Omg I said The Purge out loud a second before you 😂. I've watched so much of your stuff I must be starting to think like you.
this is one of the most relatable sets ever lmao. The bits about walking up the steps, turning the light on, and toilet paper just hit
1. ALWAYS LOOK FIRST! 🤣 2. Toilet seat covers are the next best thing 3. Just gotta wait for someone to come in the stall next to you lol 4. Call the person you're with- they gotta tell the staff for you lbs
Yep CALL A FRIEND
For a while there, it felt like it was getting worse every year. First a fight, then a stampede, and didn't people die? The news footage from that era is terrifying...
Man I LOVE Josh Johnson. I could listen to him reading the yellow pages. But anyone else out there with IBS giggling at this adorable amateur move? (ALWAYS check the roll first…)
Meeeee 😂😂😂
It’s been crazy since I can remember, in the 80s we had the cabbage patch kids “riots”
I can hear "Hermès girl" laughing...😅
Our Black Fridays were like the Alabama boat brawl, y'all.
Black Friday used to have folks headed to the hospital with nothing to show for it 😔
I feel “raw” roll😂 I sware everything be raw some kinda way in a Josh story🤣🤣
I once told a worker at this restaurant that they were out of toilet paper and he just said "ew." 😂 then proceeded to not restock the tp and do other things instead
You can solve the problem by saying they're almost out of toilet paper. Puts you in the clear
Words from a sage....
The year of tickle me elmo. Never forget
Lol! Thank you Josh for helping me get thru Lupus Treatments ✌️
Are you taking cytoxan infusion? I had to do this in 2021. Stay strong lupus warrior
Hot tip: I always use a little toilet paper to wipe the seat, partly ‘cause you can’t always see water droplets, and partly so I know there’s TP!
Yesss!!!
I put paper on the seat. People be fucking nasty. And never directly touch the door handles after washing
Bird nest
If you raw dog a public toilet you got bigger issues. Why even reach for paper atp 😂 i dont see How some folks just sit. I could NEVER@@Zevox144
Yessss😂
Always watch your clips when they pop up. You're hilarious and really know how to tell a story. thanks for sharing your talents Josh!
For real 🙏🏾
Wow, that whole toilet paper bit unlocked a new anxiety for me, thanks lmao
In the cosmetics section of Walmart, they have a "trial size" rack. On this rack are tiny packs of kleenex in a multi pack, for a dollar or two. 😉
Also, just tell the attendant there's some weird writing in the tp holder. (They'll figure it out when they go look) 😂
No happy story starts with "I was at a Denny's" 😆🤣
I think some of the folks who loved live black friday ended up storming the capitol. They missed the thrill and they didn't understand while you might be welcome to fight in a retail store, you get arrested for fighting to get into the capitol.
White Wednesday?
This is great!
Funny!
Thinking you're nasty for using the last of the toilet paper sounds like an anxiety thing, I wouldn't feel wired at all. But we all got our hang ups lol.
🤣
Give the bulb a chance to act right!
"raw roll" 😅
Longer stories please! Your hilarity is an absolute delight! I greatly appreciate all these mini-specials you keep gifting us for free! Have you been to Rogan's new comedy club in Austin? It's literally your club to simply go hang out at even if you don't have a spot but I'd bet you'd get one! He intentionally designed it to be for you and all other comics as a home base.
If you want longer stories check out his podcast, the Josh Johnson show
@@TheElusiveReality Thanks! I didn't know he had one! Hell yeah!
Josh is an actual standup… not to be confused with Joes brofest in Austin. 😬😬😂😂
@@xrzeropoint7989 because hacky shit stains are ruining an art form that is very near and dear to my heart. Next stupid question please.
@@JakeMarriott You okay down there in the basement? When it's time for dinner tell your mom I said hi.
If i walk IN the bathroom and SEE no toilet paper, im turning around. I cant possibly be caught slippin like that 😂
Two things I immediately check for in public bathrooms is cleanliness and toilet paper.. it’s a must 😂
The comic this generation needs!!!! And deserves
Josh is reminding me of how Dave Chapelle could just talk extendedly and it would be hilarious. He might be a future goat
I’m glad I didn’t break the rules and record while he was performing this set in Arlington when I came to see him last weekend because this was👌🏽 AN EPIC PERFORMANCE 🎭
Lucky.
Oooooo smart choice
So glad I got to attend the set Josh, you did not disappoint
i found you
My brother in law called the restaurant to tell them he needed toliet paper😂😂😂
That's what I was thinking! 😂 Good reason to have your phone with you.
Saw a Santa get arrested at 4 am in a Black Friday line at Target once. That wasn’t even the craziest thing that happened in that line. Used to go shopping on BF to buy the most random things that no one was fighting over. It was the only day every year my social anxiety took a break so I could enjoy the chaos. This was at a time I refused to shop on Wednesdays because that’s when most stores offer senior discounts and it gets busy out there. Thankfully there was only one instance of actual violence I witnessed. Didn’t dampen the day because the guy who got punched had it coming.
Always highlight of my week ❤
Anyone else try texting him when he posted that number?
10 minutes of toilet jokes and it fire. You are great josh
I’ve watched hundred of comedians your most definitely one of my faves your story telling ability is amazing love it keep it up!! Homie
One of the few comedians I genuinely love watching. Your material always makes me laugh.. and you laughing telling stories makes it so much better ❤
I worked at JCPenny during college winter break back in the late 80s. Black Friday was the best day because it was super busy and the day flew by.
This dude never disappoints😂😂😂😂
That last joke 😂😂😂😂 That's how real he gets.
Bro didn't even say goodbye, just walked away 😂😂
I worked at that Walmart in 2003 for the holidays. Walmart on Black Friday is its own special ring of hell. Fkin Cenla.
bro the toilet paper story happened with me in high school. 🤣🤣 Your delivery is the best bro. Great job. I just died here without beath.
Josh one of the goats 🐐
Your delivery is so dope I literally just sat there for the longest story ever and I laughed the whole time
8:14 “So I went to the bathroom and I went to the bathroom.” Callin Dennys a bathroom 😂😂
Impressive, you are killing it young man.
Having a rough week and that toilet paper story really gave me the laugh I needed.
Hilarious, enjoyed after a stressful day ❤❤❤Thank you sir.
wait you changing up the time on us? i was caught off guard. lol good thing i always have my side CZcams window open at work
😂 remeber when people had thanksgiving dinner on the blackfriday line? Scary times 😂😂😂😂
Yes i do.😮 such a weird sight on the news
So damn funny. Josh you are pure gold!
What blew my mind about black Friday was people would go be violent over retail literally HOURS after the holiday that's supposed to be focused on being humble and thankful for the things we already have in our lives 😂
Today, I needed all of those laughs!😆😆😂🤣🤣
Anybody else immediately click when they get notified 😂
8:29 its the sitting on the toilet Bare Assed for me 😂😂😢
It's amazing how he's able to make hilarious comedy from the most random, insignificant everyday events.
This is comedic gold right here!😂😂😂😂
This is unprecedented! I can honestly rely on a weekly brand-new, topical special from you and it warms my heart. I believe your specials have surpassed FDR's "fireside chats" in their iconic legendary status, and ability to soothe a nation through troubled times
I haven't cried this much in years. OMG 😂😂😂
Great set to listen to while one my phone in a Denny's bathroom!.... Huh, that's funny, I can't feel the toilet paper...?
Love this set, so relatable! From me, Nicole Marie Zanders.
I am so happy tonight that my father's procedures went ok. He will be 84 on December 21st.
I just made stir fry bbq pineapple chicken with red, green and yellow bell peppers from our garden and onions and white rice, steamed green beans and brussel sprouts with a green salad with chopped cheddar cheese and ham for my Mom and Dad.
Dad just had a colonoscopy and endoscopy this morning and I had to cook non fiber food for the past 2 days and the 3rd day all liquids while Mom wanted regular food, roasted potatoes with skin, baked chicken and for breakfast; bacon, scrambled eggs ( Dad had boiled eggs) buttery grits ( Dad could eat them) and about 6 slices of white toast instead of wheat, cottage cheese, pineapple slices, fruit cottail and bacon.❤ Never married. No children. Just taking care of my parents until I die.
Haha another great set. Damn you're right about black friday, it's crazy how aggressive everyone was and now it's gone.
This is A- tier material and delivery my guy, cant wait to see you live!
A+tier*
Remember we had a damn movie made starring Arnold Swartznegger (sp?) about Black Friday violence lol. "JINGLE ALL THE WAY" 😂
Thank you for always making us laugh!! 🙏❤🙏
ima have to rewatch this one but maybe my favorite sh*t joke of all time lololol you're so well-spoken dude
"but yeah, ive been through a lot" lmfao
Idk how this dude doesn’t have 1,000,000 subscribers. He is a gem.
💯🔥👏Thanks for the laughs🤗👏💛
Yea, but back in our day you actually got a real deal.
Your description of going to Black Friday sales as a spectator reminds me of all of the Grateful Dead concerts I ever attended. I had zero intention of ever going inside, I was there for the parking lot spectacle.
The toilet paper situation is literally the first thing I look at when I open a bathroom stall. I never just go in unprepared 😂
Oh Josh, You're too young to know that the Cabbage Patch Kid Riots of the 80s beat anything done on Black Friday.
🤣🤣🤣
Facts.
Literally every second was hilarious.
Been watching you since catfishing the KKK. You are legit getting even better all the time!
Me too and that will forever be my favourite!!! I played it for everyone for years lol
I’m so excited to see him blow up. He’s legit going to be one of The Greats.
Me, too!🎉
Love these videos! Insanely impressive how much standup you out out there. Hope to see you live soon!
Such enjoyable content throughout this whole video. An delicious treat full of non-stop laughter.Being teleported from my long day here in ILLINOIS into each secene of where your stories took place was so therapeutic. Allowing me to relax. Releasing some stress while being filled with Joy 😹
Your ability in telling stories is so natural as breathing. What aprecious gift Josh you have 🎁 The ability to capture a person's attention so easily. Then bring them on an journey with you in the story. While painting imagery with your words detailed with animation & effects. Never boring your audience mind you. Transporting us into the space and time of the event your describing in the stories Josh is remarkable❤Don't ever stop nurturing that precious gift of your special storytelling abilities honey.
Wow such capability of capturing people heart's deeply. Just envisioning now getting excited for you of all the possibilities how one could use that gift Josh Johnson you have in positive healthy ways. Making such an profound impact on this Earth. Dreaming about you Josh Johnson occupying an lecture hall setting imparting wisdom & inspiring millions. Using your story telling abilities to touch people's heart's and change their lives for the better. I'm speaking this into your life ❤️ Declaring and declaring Josh Johnson will be a ray of light to many in this generation. Making history transforming lives for the better. In return making this world a better place to live ❣️ Claiming it is happening. You Josh Johnson were born for such a time🎉 Paraphrasing from The book of Esther.
The Ride down Black Friday memory lane from watching a short piece of your set was eye opening how people in society can quickly become unhinged turning into savages. Very edifying yet so refreshingly full of truth.
Great job Josh, this was so well executed. Hope to see you in London bro.