Be Careful Who You Bully. Orlando Baxter - Full Special
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- čas přidán 5. 06. 2020
- Did you enjoy this full special from Orlando Baxter? If you did, then chances are you'll enjoy our other Dry Bar Comedy Specials as well, and you can watch them for FREE right now on the Dry Bar Comedy App. The App is free to download and is available on all Android and iOS devices.
- Komedie
Clean comedy! No F word, no N word, no B words! No swearing, no profanities!
🔥🙌🏾🙌🏾
Hence the “DRYBAR” label..... many comedians can do clean routines.
👍🏼
Sinbad's the king of the clean genre.
He did curse one time but that was it.
This is a very close family friend of mine and he’s hilarious!!! He grew up with my family and I’m seeing his show on Saturday I’m glad to support my family and see him doing his thang cause he be killing us at the house when he’s around support him y’all!!
no worries he had me at the lazy eye,
Your family friend Orlando is awesome!👍
He's good!!!
Please thank him for me. I am dealing with some tough problems that are pretty much all I think about. This set was so good (and super impressive from someone only doing standup for four years) that I was laughing all the way through it. It was a very welcome and much needed distraction.
Lucky u! ☺️😚
I'm a retired teacher who taught for 17 years in a public high school. Everything he said about teaching is TRUE!
No WAY?
Thanks for your service.
Knowledge is the 🔑
Yep! I bet you were also not surprised when they dumped the whole class on him. I’m only surprised it was just that class period!
That cappuccino joke was genius 😂😂😂
cap-a-chino. yup, the guy had Dominican neighbors indeed. I wonder If my fellow Costa Ricans moving to NJ or Florida have the same effect on their new friends.
😂🤣🤣
"I'm Basketball Black... not Baseball Black"...Hilarious 🤣👌🥰
I loved that line the best!
@@jennifergersch9126 🤣🤣🤣 me too
@@taquaeanderson2683 The New York Yankees would love that! So true!!!
Would make more sense as football black
@@DeadDogInc nope. Made perfect sense.
“ Hey Urkle, do something Urkely.”
“So I took my pencil and I stabbed him.” Lmao 🤣🤣🤣. He’s laying in the floor and I said “Did I do that?”
I definitely wasn’t expecting that 😩🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤣🤣🤣
Dont bully the wrong people I guess. 😂😂😂
Wasn't expecting that either...🤣🤣🤣
The icing on the cake is "Did I do that?" was Urkle's most popular catchphrase. Lol
That was brilliant!
I FLATLINED ➖➖
I listened to this while I was roofing my house. Nearly fell off the ladder I was laughing so hard!
That was really stupid
This clip just came into my YT feed. I haven't laughed this hard in years. I had to pause it several times. In the 54 years I have been on this earth, that cappuccino joke is in the top 5 of "funniest joke I've ever heard." The video ended 5 minutes ago and my breathing still isn't back to normal. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Im browsing CZcams on my tv, come across this and click. I hear, “I’m basketball black, not baseball black.” That’s when I put the remote down, found what I was looking for.
Exact same thing I did. At first I was like oh hell 22 min? I'm about to turn this, until I heard that.
Same
I died laughing right then.
As a baseball black that's mixed with basketball black this joke got me too
Such a good line. 👍🏼👍🏼
"Just cause we darker than you, doesn't mean our skin is made out of solar panels" 🤣🤣
photosynthesis
It actually does tho...ijs
That got me too!
@@trukturna6816 A Physics major in our midst! Yup, black absorbs light, white reflects it.
This was amazing but for the record our skin factually and absolutely contains melanin which absorb sunlight and turn it into energy. “Melanin effectively absorbs light. In fact, it is able to dissipate over 99.9% of absorbed UV radiation. This means that the pigment can shield skin from harmful sun rays. Darker-skinned people are naturally more resistant to the harmful effects of sunlight.”
I’m Brazilian and I know fluent English, but once in a while something funny still happens.
A while back I was working at a new restaurant and my boss said to me that he would have someone show me the ropes. I said “what ropes?” 😂
I used to get embarrassed as a teenager because of bullying, but as an adult, it’s just funny to me 🤣
😂😅 hey there. Just reading this a year later. So, what color and texture were these ropes? Were they worth the wait? 😂
*What* ropes? What kinda of ropes ARE there?
Kinda like the god-awful flick Fifty Shades of Grey?
*How many colors of grey ARE there?* 😂😂
Or something like that.
What kinds of different colors of ropes are there?
What different kinds of texture were there?
What about the quality of the ropes ARE there?
Are there different prices for ropes?
Was your then-employer talking about life's lessons?
Or lassos? 😅
@@anb.9386👍. Yes. Life's lessons. And lassos!
One speaks fluent english.
I watch a lot of stand up. Dry Bar has turned me on to many extreemly funny Comics that I never heard about.. Orlando Baxter is top shelf comedy. Thank You Dry Bar..
"But why should I be the only one uncomfortable" lmaoo yas. This is how to live
Kalpana that was my favorite bit and I am a white girl LOL
His name is Derrick lol cat sounds lol
“ come on sun, give it to me so I can run faster” 😭😂😭😭😂🤣
Brooo😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂
Sunlight does gives you energy or "charge u up"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sad that that white women knew mike about Black ppl than a Black man did. We do not need sunscreen and we need to absorb sunlight more than other ppl the way God made us, to synthesize Vitamin D and strengthen our immune system.
Dry Bar Comedy has the best stand-up on CZcams
facts
I once worked as a 5 grade english teacher (during the recession to make some cash. I am an engineer.but lost my job). I quit in less than 2 months. Most teachers are super humans, they deserve respect and more pay.
Give this man a Netflix show, he is hilarious. I literally LOL
I dot want to discredit him...but he reminds me of Dave Chappelle …. tone and temple
@@thisqueenwontquit9699 100%
This is the first case of correct usage of "LOL" I've seen in a decade. Proud of you.
Agreed!
Laughed out loud, and evryone uses it as laughing out loud
Don’t watch this when the rest of your household is asleep and you’re trying to be quiet. My stomach muscles were aching from stifling my laughter.
Too late I had tears trying to stay quiet
This is me every time I am watching something funny. It is HARD to keep it in.
Honey. I just let it out. My daughter will fuss at me later for being loud while she was trying to sleep!🤣
Up at 2:30am, sweating from laughter!
😁
I'm seeing this guy for the first time and he's totally hilarious.
Me too, and agreed!
The cat kid really killed it I really hope there's a sequel 😂
Im a former history teacher. "Don't clap cuz I got out!"😂🤣😂
I’m Chinese, that “Cap-a-Cheeno” joke was hilarious 🤣 🤣
chino*
That was elite level comedy 😂😂
Yeah that was funny
I had to pause the video, I laughed so hard at that.
I'm glad haha
I'm an ESL teacher so this was twice as funny to me. 😆
Im dominican and this guy just killed me 🤣🤣🤣 wepaaa wepaa 🤣🤣🤣
As a teacher this is way too accurate for my comfort.
Same.
So am I and he’s hilarious!
As an ex teacher, I agree😁
Speaks to the state of education at K-12. Teachers are fed up, so are keeping D's. It'd be great if they worked together to create a meaningful & connective curriculum. Obviously both groups are over it. That M, for Massachusetts Capitol made me lmao! Perfect example of miscommunication.
French high school math teacher here.
I totally agree.
We have the same thing from the fight to the foreign kid. THE SAME!
There was nothing dry about his bars! Dude is hilarious! Can we show some love to clean comedy ladies and gentlemen! ... EDIT: WOW! 600+ likes and counting. I am humbled. From the bottom of my heart, thank you very much!
Amen
Yes indeed😊💯👌
I love clean comedy!!! It’s hilarious and without profanity and nasty talk
U all need to see armando anto as well he is clean and hilarious
Totally Agree with "clean" routine!! Especially for today's time of comedy!!
I just re-watched this again from a while ago. He is so flipping hysterical his delivery, his motions, his actions, a comedic genius.!!!!!
Teacher stories and principal stories are funny, but this guy was hilarious 😂
We had a fight break out and a small woman comes to break it up. As the two dudes are throwing hands, one of them elbows the lady right in the nose as he cocked back for a swing. The lady picks herself back up with a bunch of blood pouring out of her face and she is FURIOUS! She grabs the arm of the young man who struck her, flips him, stress pins him, and cuffs him. Home girl is the teacher for our criminal justice course and served in the LAPD for over a decade before coming to teach! She was yelling at the dude with all this blood is getting spat everywhere! Looking like she was a goblin out of hell, everyone scrammed. Best fight memory I have.
Well, in future, you know who to put your money on 😅
This just sounds fake. Everyone scrammed? 😂😂😂
@@violetsickness7315
🤔 think he means scrambled
M
@@violetsickness7315 That...sounds...fake? Do people round where you live not believe in self preservation?
"Sorry, I'm basketball black, not baseball black." 😁😆 He's just hilarious 😂 I'm here for the 2nd time to watch this.
Me too
Me three
Best line ever. His delivery is perfect.
Only the second time ? Not good enough, I'm here for the 12th time, step your game up lol jk
“I’m basketball black, not baseball black” 😂😂😂
I'm a Shaq not a Sossa. LMAOF
Don't think I've ever laughed this much in a comedy show. This guy is gold and he needs a Netflix special!
The best comedians take stuff we see every day... and show you how funny it is! Orlando Baxter nailed it!
he is one of the funny ones
I don't see cat boys every day - but now I wish I would! 😅
He sure did!! So good..
Every day stuff is funny if you think deep, because we have a created a way of life,and taken it for reality and it's not. We are afraid to accept we do not know a thing. Comedy exposes some of these and since it's comedy people laugh it off and go back to the same old way of life.
0000
As a speech therapist, that joke about the Hispanic kid not understanding figurative language was GOLD. The accent was also very on point. 😂😂💀
I nearly fell off my chair 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I kept thinking the teacher must have said something else that sounded like "crack the window" - so I started to do some heavy thinking - that didn't pan out, so I'm here - THANK YOU!!!
I’m a speech therapist too! What about his T-shirt telling him to go to detention?! Lol
Ees no’ my fall.
@@paulawarren4013t shirt instead of teacher lol.
God has given you a beautiful gift.
You are one of my favorite comedians...
You crack me up.
🤣🤣🤣
He's funny and his timing and deliver y are top notch. I especially like his calm demeanor.
I’ve found that those comedians who deliver with calmness are the ones that I really enjoy.
YES!😂
"The teacher told me to CRACK the window" No way!!!! 😂😂😂🤯
Cap a chino? 🤷🏽♂️
Funniest shyt
@@modimmusic9571 right 😂😂😂😂
🤣😂 the t-shirt told me to crackhead window
"You ain't real teacher son, because if you were; you wouldn't be crying"!
Had me rolling😂😂😂
😂👍👍
They say that if a comedian can make the audience laugh hard without using profanity, the he/she is a true comedian. Thank you Baxter for your clean, well thought out and refreshing comedy!
Idgaf if they curse or not funny is funny
However, they never do laugh as hard and as long as when a comedian uses profanities.
"They" who???
Suburbanites??
Do suburbanites say this??
Who? Who says this??
I almost never like a comic enough to search for more videos.
My next step is to search for more Orlando Baxter videos, because this dude's frickin' awesome!!
Loved this. My husband and I are Dominicans and almost fell of the chair laughing so hard with the Dominican jokes
Este tipo es una cura 🤣
Basketball black, not baseball 😂🤣😂🤣😂🥰👍🏻. He's hysterical 🤣💞. Love it!!! Tambien soy de Rep. Dom. 🤗
And u made me laff much more reading your comment...
Maria Galvan No you Cha Cha Slide & Bachata your cheeks right off your chair. Booyaka!¡!
Basketball black not Baseball black 🤣🤣
I won't be able to order a cappuccino now without laughing at the counter.
When I first heard that word at a coffee shop, had to ask them too repeat, cuz I could only hear the slang. Till they described that it was a type of coffee.
Me too
*Way* the funniest line in the whole set. It might be the funniest thing I've yet heard in all of Dry Bar Comedy.
😂🤣
I died at that part
This guy is the bomb. So glad I found him. Expert story teller, imitator.
So funny… so clever.
So great at the “callback”.
Thanks, Orlando.
I sent this video link on to 6 more people!
You are very funny young man! A natural story teller! Reminds me of the days we'd listen to stand up comedians on albums and crack up for hours.
I've been a school bus driver for 23 years, so I can totally relate. That part about sending the kid back on the bus if they haven't taken their medication, no way. After they all get off of the bus, we be gone!! lol
It must get crazy on that school bus. Thanks for taking care of the kids to and from school. ❤
This made me laugh. Thank YOU! I needed this!
It's also very sad when they don't know the capitals of the States. It's only getting worse. Other countries no more America than kids today.
"My job is done" huh? Lmao
@@jessicayoung7132 what? Even Americans know a good chunk at least, or did I take this literally like that Dominican kid. I've seen Europeans not know our own capital
"Do you want a CAP-A-CHINO..." ROTFL
Oh my goodness...he walked right up to the line with this one. There is a lot to be said for doing comedy that the audience can watch with their kids.
It took me a whole minute to get that one 🤣🤣 Genius!
Lol I spat my food out when he said that!🤣
I don't get itttt what does it mean???????
@@notsosugacoated8954 I didn't get it too so I had to look it up. "cap" is a slang for "shoot" (like in shooting a gun), "chino" is a slang for "Chinese". I hope you get it.
Never heard of this cat before, will definitely listen to more of his stuff.
The cappuccino line had me dying. He's GOOD!
It is weird that even though this is a comedy special, that I find his voice to be very soothing?
I was thinking the exact thing!! It’s soo soothing
Nope. Not weird. I have a few comedians I listen to when I’m feeling sad just because I love the sound of their voice.
I agree. 😁
He has a nice voice.
He was a teacher so he needed that soothing voice to calm down students like cat boy lol
clean comedians that can make you laugh is highly appreciative....i hope we continue to have comedians like these
Just keep watching this channel. None of their performers are vulgar. They might use foul language in other venues, but not at Dry Bar.
*"But why should I be the only one uncomfortable in a situation??"*
👏👏👏👏👏
So good..and so glad to find this channel. I quit mainstream comedians a while back, and this is now my go to channel for stand up.
"just because I am darker then you does not mean we are solar panels" 🤣😂☠️🤣😂☠️🤣😂
I rolled when he said that😂🤣😂🥰👍🏻. He's hilarious 🤣!!! Love it
His voice is so soothing. Audible authors please hire him!!
I was an EC teacher, well started out as Special Education...things have changed a lot over the years. Everyone wants their kids to be medicated when they don't really need it. I had one student who actually needed medication in my 15 years of teaching. I could see him across the school parking lot getting off of the bus and tell if he didn't have his medication. There were only a few days that this happened. We had a wonderful Principal, she called the mother and told her we couldn't handle him and not to bring him back until he got his medication. That worked! His mother didn't want to keep him all day.
OMG!!! Teacher here = THANK YOU!! its been rouuuugh these past 2 years. I just recommended this to my fellow Teachers right before the Holiday Break ,cuz we were all dragggging== We LOVED and appreciated that Peace , from South Berkeley ,Ca
As a proud Dominican, I'm in tears!!! He's so good.
"But why should I be the only 1 uncomfortable in this situation" ROFL
Impressive, all the characters referenced were hilarious. Teachers are truly one of our superheroes 🙌🏾 Especially the ones that are now comedians!
As a former teacher, he’s so hilarious. 😂🤣
On point Dominican accent!!! Great storyteller! Had my attention the entire time and I didn't want him to finish
That's what she said
@@humbleonemoretime7025 LMFAOOOO
Orlandito que paso
You forgot to pause 😅
humble servant dammit you beat me to it 😂
I'll never hear the word cappuccino again without thinking of this routine.
Too true
@@tammys8711 cup-of-chino
A lot of people don't get it 🤣
You want to Pop a cino
@ Leo Duren- Agree- cappuccino was clever… Some might not watch mob movies to know what “to cap someone” means + the Chino as reference to Chinese. Can’t be the same at cafe now
I saw him in person as a guest comedian on a cruise. He was hilarious.
This guy is hilarious!! Only four years doing standup. Amazing!!
"You can't wear pajamas to school because they're afraid your pencil might fall out!"😂😂😂😂
"Hey! put that thing away or I'll take it!"
I had a math teacher that hissed at us like a goose when we weren't doing our homework. He was one of the most popular teachers.
My high school had a teacher who regularly stood up and beat his chest like Tarzan. Scream and all. Believe it or not, he was the most sane teacher there.
@@pixelbucket8884 WTF😂😂
Hahahaha what?😂
@@pixelbucket8884 Lmfao sounds like my high school..😂😂😂
@@pixelbucket8884 that's how he kept his sanity 🤣🤣
I've listened to this every few months
He's hilarious. I subbed for a over a year.
So funny and refreshing! Comedy without cursing!
What a breath of fresh air. He needs to be famous now!!! Hilarious
yes,refreshingly good and expert at his craft.
"She quit before she finished taking attendance."
LOL. I can see this in a movie.
Omg hilarious and he didn’t go for the low hanging fruit (profanity and isolated race jokes). Pure talent!! I needed this. Keep going 😊
“If you were a real teacher, you wouldn’t be crying!” 🤣 IM DEAD!!!
As a former thick glasses wearer I approve this message entirely .
Love that he does routine without profanity - and is refreshingly funny as heck - Yasssssssssssssssss
All of dry bar is like that.
I’m starting to think that DRYBAR is just that -- “dry”, no profanity.
@@slagwill5599 it's no alcohol in regards to the dry...
@@bayoubilly5176 - well of course that’s “literal” - a literal dry bar is non alcoholic -- this is figurative. Lol. You know - like a apt metaphor which has nothing whatsoever to do with drinking but with cussing . See how that works? “Dry” here applies to “plain comedy” just as it applies to a non-alcoholic bar. No getting drunk - no curse words. That’s the whole point. A play on words.
Incase you didn't know, NONE of the comedians use profanity on this channel, "Dry Bar Comedy". And yes, it is VERY refreshing.
Be healthy and safe.
Omgoodness- I love this guy!!! Fantastic performance!
Y’all need to have Orlando back. I’d forgotten how funny he is.
"What's the capital of Massachusetts?" "Ooh I know It's the letter M, hello" 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️😆😆😆
Ooohhhh lmao
Well its correct isn't it
@@johnree6106 I can name the capital of any state you give me.
Technically correct, the best kind of correct
@@NatandGeorge Depression.
As a teacher, everything he said about the school system is TRUE!! It is like a looney house rather than an education institution. ..Kids on medication, bipolar, schizo, they like fighting-both black and white kids, they dont know how to reason and process information correctly. I taught 12th grade which is British Lit in GA. I pulled up a world map on the projector and asked the students where Britain was located. One of my seniors eagerly raised his hand and then dashed off to the board and proudly pointed to Brazil on the map😬
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Because parents aren't raising adults anymore. Parents have given up.
The worst part is they're overwhelmed with hormones and don't hold back.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Britian is one of the easy ones? How'd he get that wrong
30 minutes in and we’re all tied up- 0 to 0! 😂😂😂 Good stuff!
OMG, don't be eating breakfast while watching Orlando Baxter. Several times I almost spit my food out, and choking while laughing!. Yes he needs a special. Sandy
Orlando is seriously talented in comedy. I agree that this man definitely should have a Netflix special
What's the capital of Massachusetts?
"M!" Hello! I died laughing
Come on now, she was an English major...
Ih my goodness!! Hilarious!!! I'm a middle school teacher and I can so relate!! I had a kid crawling on my floor meowing like a cat one day! No lie!! 😂🤣
I love this guy ! I'm busy and running late and now I'm an extra 22 minutes late ! Best I've heard in ages and I watch a lot of good comedy .
This feels like those nineties or early 2000s sitcoms. He is very very funny
I was thinking that. He'd make a good writer for a sitcom.
Very natrual, classic comedian.
As a 15 year high school teacher I FEEL this waaaaayyyy too much! And some parents wait until their kids get home to give them their medication so they raise hell in school but are calm at home. First parent teacher conference they’ll say you’re lying about their behavior because “they don’t act like that at home”. Yeah we know!!!
And he is so right about ESL students and how schools/teachers don’t always choose their words wisely or consider language differences. I teach chemistry and during lab safety I told them they need to rinse their eyes if something gets in it. My sweetheart student didn’t know what rinse meant so I said wash your eyes. She was mortified! She thought I meant that you’d need to put soap in your eyes. We both laughed after we closed the communication gap.
I totally agree with your first paragraph.
@@gavinb1936 yeah because the grammar was bad, it should have said something like "as a high school teacher of 15 years" or "as a 15 year veteran of high school teaching"
@@gavinb1936 Me too. Had to revisit the beginning because something "didn't feel right". 😁
i am a teacher and i literally have boys scream " I knew that one" every day" and now thanks to you I have to keep from laughing in their face- everyday. THank you for helping me stay light hearted and get enjoyment out of my profession
It’s great to see a truly funny man who is not vulgar! This is an entertainer! 👏👏👏
This man had me rolling. So glad I stumbled on this.
Same!
" Once you start Making cat noises they don't let you back you in the general population man"
AHAHAHAHAHAHHHAAHHAAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
That was my favorite to. Legit LOL
he answers... I'm not a cat whisper-er, cat boy! haha 😃
Hey he purring now 😂😂
As an ex teacher of challenged kids, I felt that 😁
Straight out of the gate....... I was in stitches. Thank you for so many laughs
He is one of the funniest people I have heard in a long time. Well done, well done. Cap a chino - I almost choked on my coffee!
All his accents are ON POINT! So happy to finally be able to watch comedy without wincing at the foul language parts. And I actually laughed out loud for most of it! Very very talented story teller and comedian.👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🇳🇬
a far good cry from the 80's rude stand up Eddie murphy.
I couldn't agree more
Same here!!
AGREE 👍💖🥰
🇳🇬
The Cap-a-chino joke is one of the most clever jokes I’ve ever heard. On god 🤣🤣
This dude is very good. Laughed throughout. He's sharp!
Clever, funny, original. Great work, Mr. Baxter!
"Basketball black..."
"He's purring now..."
🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
😭😭😂😂 the tshirt told me to crack the window
Donnovan Bennett XD!
I work at a school and this really happened one day and I could not stop laughing at the kid.
😂😂😂😂😂
Yes, t-shirt...
@Donnovan Bennett "Do you wanna cap a chino"? 🤔
This one killed me!
I never laughed that hard alone.
I don't usually laugh when alone, even if the sh*t is really funny (And most, if not all, of my friends don't understand English. So watching stand-ups alone is not an option.).
That's how I am. But this one was brutal.
Cheers from France! 🍻
"THAT'S A GOOD CAT...THATS THUNDERCAT RIGHT THERE" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀💀💀
You are a breathe of fresh air!!! Thank you 😂😂😂😂