Should You Marry Two Unbelievers? | Pastor Well - Ep 42
Vložit
- čas přidán 29. 09. 2022
- In this episode, Hershael York talks about preaching the gospel while counseling non-christians that are preparing for marriage.
Hosted by pastor-scholar Hershael York, the Pastor Well Podcast offers a wellspring of wisdom from about the insights learned from a life of faithful ministry.
Watch more Pastor Well episodes here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCWzL...
Marriage is an institution of God from beginning of creation, that very much answers the question.
Think about this, if two non-believers are living together out of wedlock and one or both find Jesus, now they immediately have to make a major decision in order to stay right with God. Get married or move out. On the other hand, if they are married and one or both encounter Christ, that's one obstacle they don't have to overcome in their discipleship.
Such wisdom, thank you.
This is a discussion we had with several ministers..
It was insightful.
We took it seriously and this is what we did in the past and now.
With believers it's a joyfull occasion. Usually the couple when there pre marriage couciling (Some several weeks and some shorter or longer)
We meet with them and go over the marriage service.
When unbelievers we will always be open to why they picked me or my denomination and that's leads into sharing the beauty of our faith and how God made and how God desires of a marriage relationship with each other and with Him.
Note:
(and this is important)
And how it differ with unbelievers (not having God as there source and not having a relationship with Him and successful marriages have a stronger bond that keeps a marriage.
Note :
All most always the response is. "I never truly knew that"
And they ask hundreds of questions..
Our goal as ministers is to minister.
To shares the trues of Jesus
and the Father.
And when you are with the couple you have to share that you want there marriage to be God centered with the Father and with each other to make it successful..
And about the different roles as husband and wife has.
And tell them we want to help and will either yourself or someone else will gladly meet again a few times to walk with them in that process.
Note :
That's being a minister in the Kingdom of God..
Maybe no one has ever shared that insight with them.
Hopefully they will agree and hopefully they will accept what your sharing and hopefully they will both be lead to accept Christ as there Savior and seeing each other in there marriage how God sees and works in them.
Almost always they say yes to learning more and will say yes to at least another councing session..
If after that...
What ever there levels of saying yes or no to being a believer or not..
We all would marry them and follow up on them several times to see how it's going and to let them know that there important to you and you and the Church gladly opens its doors to you if you ever have a desire to come.
Lastly,
If you have a 1st meeting with an unbelieving couple and you talked about all that I mentioned above and they reject it and say..
We're not interested at all..
Then that's a opportunity to try to dig deeper in the reasons they feel that way..
Remember,
We're sharing and Minister the truths of God always and we look for opportunities like that..
If then if you get a resistance to you and all the questions you ask....
Simply ask them why do you want me or my denomination to assist you in marrying you?
Listen for there response..
It's usually because we don't know anyone else of its my parents church....
Lastly,
Tell them it's a very important
service for you as a minister
and your basic requirements are for them to go through the normal pre marriage procedures that you and the Church has.
Tell them what you require from them and see what they say..
If there stance is I'm not interested is doing that then you say " I honestly wish you blessing in your marriage and I'm sure that you will find someone else who would marry them"
Remember,
Show them love and compassion...
If they say yes to pre marriage counseling and they attend all there meetings and there still unbelievers....
We all would marry them in hopes of them one day soon see the light and receive Christ as Lord for both of them.
Blessings brother
Greg
Appreciated your insights here. Always best when a couple desires to welcome God into their marriage & not just to their wedding ceremony.
Weddings present an opportunity to share God's council with many unchurched people. Take it.
I get to present Jesus' views on many issues during the premarital counseling with the couple. It is when those are completed (6-10 hours) that I decide whether or not to participate in the wedding. They are told that up front. On only 2 occasions in 30-something years have I decided not to perform the wedding & it didn't take 10 hours to figure that out. Wasn't that they shouldn't marry, but that they shouldn't marry yet. They had much work to do individually to be prepared to commit their lives to each other.
Also got a kick out of your statement "I love marriage, but I hate weddings". (That's MINE now, Neighbor!)
Press on!
Pastor Well. What about a divorce, that wants to be remarried? I would highly appreciate a talk about this topic.
God doesn’t support remarriage. See 1 Corinthians 7:10 & 39, Romans 7:2-3, Matthew 5:31-32, Matthew 19: 3-10, Mark 10: 2-10. Not only for believers, but unbelievers also. Hope these Scriptures help.
Great question
So true
I disagree because how is a person a believer if they are in a sinful lifestyle? And when did she become a believer?
Get that Money
What do you do if one of them become a believer during counseling and the other remains unsaved?
Pray harder😊😉
Your weakness in The Word is an unacceptable compromise to Truth. God will judge you harshly.
Don’t get me wrong, this comment is motivated by love.
What about marrying a divorcee
Per Christian faith and according to Jesus, it’s a sin for a divorcee to remarry.
But if she wants to follow Christ should she not rather marry a believer instead of the unbelieving father of her kids?
I would think you'd have to follow your faith. That said, slippery slope, you are going to judge if the couple is Godly enough to marry them? The wife and I had a "preacher" tell us we wouldn't make it 2 years, and himed and hawed before marrying us, said we were not Godly enough,. I being a Catholic and she being a Lutheran, neither of us being a Baptist... We've been married 25 years now, and getting married brought us closer to our faith. I would say you have to be careful to not use your own judgement but rather depend on your faith, knowing Gods will can be a tricky thing right?
The question isn't "are they godly enough?" but "ARE THEY TRUE BELIEVERS IN CHRIST?"
@@axljoven984 A preachers job is to do that, I get that and I meant no disrespect to anyone. I'm saying often times I think that question gets confused. Maybe not by you, but I've seen it. A LOT of people are not "TRUE" believers. A lot of folks want to walk in the light right along with you but have doubt, they are not as on fire or sure as you are. That's a stick spot anyway, I don;t envy you. You have to use your God given discernment and not confuse your will with that discernment.
@@MrBizley45 I see. I get what you're saying about the preachers. Though what exactly is your concern with the video? I got confused here. Is it that he (the speaker) shouldn't judge the couple if they're true believers? And that he should conduct their marriage irrespective of their spiritual standing before God? I'm not trying to argue and I apologize if I sound like that.
Before I go, I agree with what you're saying about God given discernment as long as it's informed by scripture. I would even say that we must compare even our discernment (no matter how godly we think it is) to scripture. Godbless!
@@axljoven984 I was trying to share another view. We joke about the preacher not wanting to marry us. It's not anything I'm resentful about, although I was taken aback at the time. As a Catholic I was always called a doubting Thomas. I believe in God, how could I not? The world is pretty amazing. But Jesus...The Christ? Obviously HE believed he was...and many others. But like many others, I couldn't be sure. Many of us operate on the assumption he was, even though we are not sure, because we WANT to believe and walk in the same light you do. Are we bad Christians? Maybe. I would just hope to ask priests take into account a mans desire to serve God and his wife and family when looking to marry, along with if he actually believe Jesus is the Christ. Obviously if a couple comes to a priest and says they don't believe in God and have no intention of raising any kids they might have in a Godly way, then of course the priest would refuse. If you have a couple and they say they believe in God and they're not positive about Jesus but want to be , then maybe its in everyone's best interest, especially the kids they might have, to marry the couple. That's all I was trying to get across. God Bless you too.