From Insight to Self-love, Self-care: 4 Conditions, 4 Steps
Vložit
- čas přidán 28. 08. 2024
- There are 4 conditions to any self-transformation and personal growth: self-awareness, empathy, emotions, motivation.
Self-love is a healthy self-regard and the pursuit of one’s happiness and favorable outcomes. It rests on four pillars:
1. Self-awareness: an intimate, detailed and compassionate knowledge of oneself, a SWOT analysis: strengths, weaknesses, others’s roles, and threats
2. Self-acceptance: the unconditional embrace of one’s core identity, personality, character, temperament, relationships, experiences, and life circumstances.
3. Self-trust: the conviction that one has one’s best interests in mind, is watching one’s back, and has agency and autonomy: one is not controlled by or dependent upon others in a compromising fashion
4. Self-efficacy: the belief, gleaned from and honed by experience, that one is capable of setting rational, realistic, and beneficial goals and possesses the wherewithal to realize outcomes commensurate with one’s aims.
Self-love is the only reliable compass in life. Experience usually comes too late, when its lessons can no longer be implemented because of old age, lost opportunities, and changed circumstances. It is also pretty useless: no two people or situations are the same.
But self-love is a rock: a stable, reliable, immovable, and immutable guide and the truest of loyal friends whose only concern in your welfare and contentment.
Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: www.amazon.com...
Prof. Vaknin, the best time for me to hear this! 74 and struggling with being hoovered tomorrow yet again! Without your wise counsel over a long period, I wouldn't have been able to leave my relationship.Slowly but surely coming back to Me....and I'm liking what I find! Bless you.
You give me hope
1) Self awareness
2) Empathy
3) Motivation to change
4) Acces to emotions (Negative and positive emotions)
Treat yourself like someone you love ❤
becoming more and more self aware with the guidance of your words and life circumstances is so painfully soothing and discomfortably liberating.
I feel like I'm lost, going in to the right direction
Lol, perfect words. Hoping to go in the right direction
Professor Sam you are the best 😉At clearly explaining this crazy subject . So a big thank you for your amazing work you share . How fortunate are we the listeners.
Thank you, Prof. Vaknin!
I listen to the long videos gratefully and each one helps in its own way.
But this one is so simple, so true and very complex- I love to get the basics in place. It gives me more peace and clarity, and it hurts more at the same time (for seeing how much I failed myself, especially)
Today I let go of the hope to be able to teach my ex- husband empathy for our son ( with autism ).
This happened yesterday, like ever so often before:
The child gets hurt with very awful threats and gives me a phone call in despair and shortly after, the father has no ear for my concern, but is proud that his "method" works (= makes the child comply) and he declares how much he cares about the childs happiness while they BOTH act, as if nothing bad has happened leaving me a puzzled whitness .
I get so much blame for every sentence , especially one in "beautiful non violent communication".
Thank you for this video, it helps me really " feel " the reason for the known rules on a deeper level .
I let go of the hope of beeing seen by my ex husband a year after separattion, but I realise, I have to let go of the hope in behalf of our children as well.
Letting go is difficult, as there is also active alienation going on, so thank you for the support.
Thank you for the focus and insight on my side of my journey. Iv found mountains on his inablities. With therapy and reading, iv gotten so much insight on the functions of the abuser. I have found it difficult to access insight on my own side of the story. Iv been searching for answers about why iv ended up in such a situation. This class has explained my lack of awareness. I will be listening to it daily for months to come till I have properly absorbed its very necessary lesson. Im determined this year to change from being codependent . Id be lost in a frightening fog forever without you insight. Thank you for the calm, hope and happiness you have help me become. ❤
Love it! ... and myself 😊 and you Prof Vaknin! 😁
prioritizing our own emotional safety/self love is next to impossible to negotiate w a pwNPD. I like the concept of being a compassionate witness or detaching with love from a toxic relationship. But also I will confess, I have never had a healthy relationship and I contribute to the toxicity so I must take your advice ... Ty.
So glad to see some advice FOR folks with NPD, rather than just for those of us who are breaking free from people with this disorder. It is so sad that people commonly believe there is no cure, but I hold on to the hope that there is a cure. Why should there not be a cure, folks with NPD are damaged too by this.
Excellent video and content on Self-love! Best definition I've heard yet.
Thank you, Professor Vaknin!
2 for 1 special this morning! Thank you Dr/ Professor Vaknin, we're nor worthy.
Yes, we are. :)
@@user-tb5lw9fb7k I was speaking as a narcissist would.
Thank you, yet again Professor Vaknin.
For the last six years i have been following this path. Fucking painful.
Thank you.
Self love and healing must include evolving beyond identification w the limited role of victim or perpetrator, narcissist or codependent. Our limited parts dance together and we sometimes identify w them, but they are not who we are. Let’s evolve beyond these limited identities. There is a way to heal, not just from the relationship, but from the identity with the role we play. When we are healed, individuals w narcissist or codependent parts can hold their own center strongly enough that the gravitational pull of the power dynamic is dwarfed by our own center. Maybe it takes another lifetime to get there or maybe it is in this lifetime. Personally, I’m going there now. And I’m going there while holding the beauty of the power dynamic and the individuals who have the courage to play w it.
Excellent video Sam☀️🦾
How does Ayn Rand’s philosophy of self-love and altruism correspond with yours, thank you.
Join my Nothingness channel.
WoW 💪🏼
Some I know, when I asked why would she do that she will say I don’t care because I feel nothing I am dead, and she will immediately shift the blame you killed my inside and this was so confusing
😊