How To Handle Your ADHD Child's Threats When They're Not Getting Their Way
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- čas přidán 14. 07. 2024
- ADHD Dude provides parent training through the ADHD Dude Membership Site, in-person school-year programs, and summer camps. ADHD Dude is not gender-specific content.
𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗥𝘆𝗮𝗻 𝗪𝗲𝘅𝗲𝗹𝗯𝗹𝗮𝘁𝘁, 𝗟𝗖𝗦𝗪, 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗-𝗖𝗖𝗦𝗣
Ryan is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified School Social Worker, and father to a son with ADHD & learning differences. ADHD Dude is based in Tucson, Arizona.
𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗷𝗼𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆:
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This is 1000% true and wish we had done this..
Wow, just wow. I struggled with this with my son when he was little. And you’re right it was the shame of his behavior that kept me from talking about it outside of the family. We did get Therapists but it didn’t seem to help change his behavior. If anything, it just gave it more power. But Having my sister, who is the ‘cool ‘aunt call him or have him reach out to her has always been helpful to him. In his case, more helpful than any therapist actually. The extreme and immature threats have diminished greatly as he has aged. He’s 16 now. But he still struggles with his focus at school.
That is exactly why individual therapy is not a recommended treatment for kids with ADHD. I've heard many parents say the same as you that it empowers kids more because it validates that they should be treated as a partner in parenting. That's great you figured out that reaching out to your sister was helpful, it's essentially what I'm talking about in this video. Glad to hear he's doing well.
We did this for a long time with my now 20 year old. I would say it worked for our family until he was about 18/19. We used his grandma who was super calm. She either called or would come over.
These behaviors have been super difficult for me as my father did commit suicide. One thing I've learned though is genuine suicidal mentality is often a separation from their family, friends, hobbies, interests, & reality. They often *quietly * disconnect. If they're screaming it from the rooftops, they're often screaming for other reasons.
--> safety is always priority like Ryan said of course. This is just my 2 cents from both sides of the table
I'm sorry to hear about your father. It makes sense why these behaviors would be difficult. What you said is exactly accurate.
@@ADHDDude Thank you 🩵
You have excellent videos! I've learned a lot about ADHD through these great videos. Thank you! :)
Thank you for your wisdom. Spot on.
Thanks for watching!
This is super helpful, thank you so much Ryan!
Glad it was helpful!
What do we do when we have no support outside the family (because everyone either has withdrawn from the family or our son doesn't respect them)?
He does somewhat respect his teachers but we don't have any way for them to interact with the family outside school time.
Supporters do not need to be family members, or need to be local. I've worked with families where the supporter is a teacher or principal. They don't need to reach out to them immediately.
This was a really helpful part of Scaffolding Better Behavior!
I see a lot of videos about this kind of behavior... my child does not make threats, break things or tantrum he may be obstinate and argumentative and I've appreciated the advice on not getting sucked into their circular arguments. It has made me wonder if this is an essential part of ADHD cluster of symptoms, or is this the ODD component? If there is anxiety, how does that change presentation? I'm hoping to join you site this summer! thank you for your videos.
Please see this: czcams.com/video/UD-Ku2vTchg/video.html
Thank you for this … very informative! What happens when the child acts like that at school or towards a teacher? And no support is available just internal exclusion and labelling? Many thanks
It's hard for me to answer wtihout having any context to what's happening at school.
@@ADHDDudeou are absolutely right, all I can say it’s that my child has lost trust in the teacher as she is picking on him constantly, from small to big things, he is not angelic don’t get me wrong but he thinks even if it’s others fault she will blame me so I might as well fulfill her expectations ,the teacher told him she doesn’t trust him so that broke him I think thank you, my son is 11, going to high school in September