Autism as an adult | Diagnosed as Autism Spectrum Disorder after 50 | Tips for dealing with autism
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- čas přidán 29. 08. 2024
- This video discusses what it’s like being diagnosed as autistic spectrum disorder as an adult.
I offer some insights into what the common traits of autism are, how it’s affected me and my tips going forward.
If you’ve recently been diagnosed as Autistic, this video is for you.
I got my diagnosis at the age of 59 (4 day short of my 60th birthday.) Lots of this hits home.
Boy I can so relate. Too old to care now. Wish I had help as a child. At least my granddaughter was diagnosed at 4 and getting much help.
You’re never too old Anne
Get a referral and get the diagnosis Anne it’s not too late
A few weeks ago I was diagnosed with Autism Level 1. I’m 42. Still trying to wrap my head around it. Not a surprise but still life changing. It explains a lot of things. As a person with no friends it was good to see from this video I’m not alone. Thanks for sharing.
Cheers mate. Are you from the USA? What tests did you take?
@@TynesideLifeI'm from the UK. I went through the NHS. I asked my GP if I could get referred or get some help with an ASD assessment. I was told a few years back it would take a while - NHS - typical. However I did get referred to my local Mental Health unit, they told me about "Right to choose" and Psychiatry UK. Anyway I got referred expecting a quicker turnaround. Another year later and after completing the forms, speaking to the doctors there, I was given a diagnosis.
It’s just that in the UK we don’t have levels. There is no such thing as High Functioning Autism in the UK. This can be verified on the NHS website.
We’re all diagnosed as ASD when going through the ADOS tests by psychiatric clinicians.
Can you describe some of the tests and experiments you did as they’re all basically the same across the UK. I know this as I’ve obviously been through the full process.
It seems you’ve been informally diagnosed?
Man, listening to you describe the features were like waves of recognition washing over my brain. I’m 50 and I’ve been off work with anxiety and depression for 2 years now, been to therapy, multiple different medications and no avail. On seeing my new therapist for the third time, he gave me an Alis Rowe book and asked me to read it and see what I thought. It was the same experience as listening to you. Everything made sense. This is how I came to find your channel, seating CZcams for ASD late adult.. I need to see my GP quick sharp. My life has been f--d for decades, lived alone, one divorce, no ability to have a relationship last more than 18months and so much anger, anxiety and frustration. For as long as I can remember…. My head is swimming right now but I hope this means I can gain some meaningful assistance. Thank you for sharing this, it means a great deal to hear and see this content. 🙏🏻
Thank you for sharing mate. I’ve suffered similar problems as yourself, now I have no mental health issues, NONE, despite my autism. I’ve never used medication either.
What was my cure? I don’t tell myself I’m a victim. It’s not cool.
My life is a culmination of my own decisions, for which I now take full responsibility for.
Good things and bad things will still happen but that’s just life. Embrace the problems, I find growth there.
Nobody really gives a shit because they have their own problems too.
Im not special, I’m another talking monkey, on a giant rock, spinning through infinite space.
Be kind and be my own person.
Be involved in something bigger than myself.
Study stoicism
Im going to die, at any moment.
There’s a thought experiment. If you woke up tomorrow and everyone else had vanished, so would your anxieties and depression. What does that mean? Every problem we have, EVERY PROBLEM, we have is an interpersonal relationship problem. We are overly concerned with the thoughts of others.
Good luck 👍🏻🤛🏻
I'm 68 and tomorrow I have my first appointment with a therapist to find out if I'm on the spectrum. I've already taken the AQ and the Aspie Quiz, both of which point squarely in that direction. I'm still not clear about what good a diagnosis will do, but having felt like a fish out of water all my life, the idea that I am autistic just makes so much sense to me.
Finding out earlier would probably have improved my life considerably because I would not have spent so much time wondering wth is wrong with me.
Thanks for sharing your experience, Eddy.
Let me know how you get on 👍🏻
@@TynesideLife I will Eddy. Thanks for asking.
My story exactly… I just turned 65.
Exactly why I finally sought out a formal diagnosis in my 50s! I just got sick of being asked “What is wrong with you?”, being told to “grow up” all my life and felt like I was living in the Twilight Zone when it came to the so many head scratching human interraction balls ups I seemed to repeatedly find myself in. And of course that leads to a constant self questioning “What IS wrong with you?” while also often feeling quite gifted with my heightened sensitivity and self awareness.
Having a definitive diagnosis now gives me my answer: there’s nothing “wrong” with me, I’m just wired different.
It’s better than having been misdiagnosed and prescribed every damaging psychotropic medication that was whatever flavour of the time for most of my adult life!
I got a diagnosis last year I’m 51 it’s helped me identify with what I already knew so validation
Hi Eddie, I'm 55 years old. My doctor sent me to Chester le Street mental health centre, about 2 years ago for the first examination for ASD. At the end of the examination , the examiner told me that I have traits for Autism, but also have traits for ADHD. I'm still on the waiting list for the main test date. I wish it was here, just to find out for sure. From a very early age, life has been really hard for me, like thousands of other people, and yourself included. Failed relationships. People who I thought were my friends, really weren't in the end. I feel so different than other people. Sometimes I find it really hard to carry on, but somehow I find the strength to carry on. Sorry for going on. And thank you for your videos. Stay Safe and Well. Regards. Mark.
Thank you for making this video.
Its been my go to video for the rough times the last year
Thank you 🙏 I’m glad it has helped
wow that was clear as crystal. well done for your hardwork. Im not diagnosed but am now convinced this is where Im at. Im the wrong side of 50 also. ive watched a handful of videos now and they all make SO much sense to me. a true lighbulb moment. thank you.
🙏
Thank you, you've just spoke my life, my words, everything! I'm 50, seeing the doctor in Wednesday and hope to get in a better place 😘
Hope it goes well Andy. Could take a year or two for a diagnosis 🤜🏻
Oh please post more! ❤ thank you so much you are a joy
Thank you, Eddy, great video. I am the NT 'wife' of a wonderful undiagnosed 41 year old autistic man. We live in Newcastle, so your videos are literally 'close to home' and help me a lot to better understand him. x
Thanks you for sharing Elizabeth 🙏
I feel I am going to repeat what so many others have said. I won’t go into details but, I was diagnosed at 50. I had to fight hard to have the assessment. It was NOT easy to get an assessment but, I think my severe depression / anxiety and long periods off work with stress gave support to my demands. They had to be DEMANDS as requests seemed to be ignored. I was a teacher for 18 years. The highly structured environment made it easier to fit in. It was only when I became an assistant headteacher that everything fell apart. I could not massage the truth to government agencies, which got me into trouble with my superiors and everything crumbled. Now, my life is simple, as stress free as I can make it. I have coping strategies, and since my diagnosis, I think the most major change for me is that I am more ME than I have ever been. I mask less….. if people don’t like it then, they don’t have to be around me. Every word you said could have been taken from my life. Thank you!
I love your message Kali and it means a lot that you shared this. Thank you 🙏
I haven’t been diagnosed but I am pretty sure I have autism. I was born to older parents (mom was 38, dad was 43). Growing up, I struggled fitting in and making friends. To this day I don’t have any friends. I am 38 years old and never had any type of romantic interaction with a woman. I suffer from severe anxiety and depression. I have trouble making eye contact. I stay in my bedroom most of the time. Masking has helped but autism always finds a way to show itself.
Thank you for sharing 👍🏻
hi Eddie, I really appreciate your video it made a lot of sense to me. I'm also ex-forces but never ever felt as though I fitted in properly. I've been a teacher for a long time as well but always felt like I was never worthy enough or never good enough. I think this is caused huge problems within my marriage as well which is always been very volatile and has affected my feelings of self-worth and giving me an even greater feeling of low self-esteem. my wife has recently qualified as a therapist and she is convinced that I am on the autistic spectrum and wants me to have a look at this sort of thing so that I can maybe find some answers. really appreciate the video again and I will be doing some more looking into myself. see if I can arrive at a happier place. just turned 50 as well and I don't want to have the same frustrated low outside of feelings that I've had most of my life at various times. all the best. Will will definitely be subscribing to your channel. Pete
I’m pleased the video resonated with you Peter and thank you for subscribing.
A diagnosis can take up to two years but it’s worth finding out 👍🏻
Just been diagnosed literally 7 weeks ago, and am approaching my 62nd birthady. Have known for decades I was different to the majority of others, but just not how different. Suffered from extreme anxiety and bouts of depression for the same amount of time. There isn't an aspect of my teen and adult life which this condition, (as I don't like to call it a disorder), hasn't had a huge detrimental impact on just about everything that really makes life worth living. I just hope that in time, I can come to terms with how I am, and somehow move on and finally start to live life as it should be lived, to it's fullest, as I never have been able to do, prior to finding out I have a ND Brain. To be brutally honest, I'm still in a state of shock and confusion, but at least I can now put a label on how I'm different, and not think of myself, as being delusional or mad. I think the word Carnage, you used, fits perfectly the way this condition, has impacted my life, to date. By the way, love the Toon videos you post. Ha ' way the Lads ! NUFC for Ever
Thank you for sharing 👊🏻🙏
Same here. There isn’t a single aspect of my teen and adult life that autism hasn’t affected in a negative way. Here I am in hood physical shape and can mask with the best of them but relationships are impossible and work is a constant daily struggle . I’m simply exhausted . I’m not sure how to live an autistic life “to its fullest”.. what does that even look like?
@@brianmeen2158 if you embrace your autism, don’t try to ‘fit in’ by masking, learn to accept your limitations and keep away from your triggers, you’ll be living your fullest life as possible.
I am now 👍🏻👊🏻
Brian it sounds like we are very similar, and had a very similar experience of the condition. I don't know what the answer is, if only I did, ........... ( to living a fuller more normal existence). But I'm going to try to give it a go, as far as I can before I die. I just don't know how, I'm going to do it, ? yet.
But at least I do know now, why I'm the way I am, and have felt the way I have for all of these years, and I wasn't being delusional, or going just a little bit mad.
@@brianmeen2158
I relate so much to this. I’m a nurse and I was able to mask my whole career but was so mentally exhausted by the time I got home that I barely had energy for my family. I wish I picked a career that better fit my personality, just like you said. I chose nursing because I like science and I think it is an honorable profession, but never realized how much of my soul it took to survive. Being an engineer would have been more my style, but I didn’t even know what that was when I was younger, lol! But my career was definitely out of my comfort zone and I learned what I am capable of. Unfortunately, several members of my family have had health problems this past year and I’m currently being evaluated for MS and with all that stress, I finally broke down at work & it’s a bad situation. Losing my health has been the biggest blow. I self diagnosed myself with ASD years ago and my counselor agrees. After my initial consult with a psychologist, she also agrees with my neurodivergence so I’ll be undergoing formal testing in the next few weeks. I’m excited to see what it will all say. The psychologist says these assessments are very helpful in life, so maybe it will give me some tips on navigating through life since I feel like I’ve been running blind all these years. 😂
Thank you for sharing ☝️👍🏻
Thanks for making this (difficult) video, so many can appreciate it. I've never been diagnosed but have many of the symptoms. Lucky anxiety, repetitive motions, poor physical coordination and many other signs are not there. But I am not good socially in large groups (ok in one on ones), and have difficulty keeping friends unless our interests are very similar, and even then its rough. I end up doing well in jobs that give me physical space and alone time, and this is awful for many careers, especially early on in the career. One needs to be able to work in groups to get them behind your great ideas, or they remain only ideas.
Thanks for sharing that mate. It’s a crippling disability left untethered. I share some of your difficulties. I’m not a good team player either. Getting a diagnosis for me was a massive relief and gas helped me move forward.
Hope you seek to get a diagnosis bud 👍🏻
Thanks for posting the video. I'm 58 and was only diagnosed last year. It clarified a lot for me. I'm going to check out stoicism.
Stoicism has changed my life and rid me completely of mental health issues 👍🏻
Thank you so much for your great video. I love your NE accent so easy on ear and gentle and flows well. I am sending this to my daughter age 32 and pray she will listen to it as I believe she is on the spectrum and struggling with work and relationship issues. Well done for putting your motivational and personal video on line. Much appreciated and most enjoyable to hear your important story. Lady age 72 SWAustralia ☘️👍😀
Thank you Shirley and I hope your daughter finds it useful 🙏
Really hit the nail on the head with that Eddy.Ive got a few of those and my release is laughter .If I didn't, who knows?
I'm 67 now so,reading,researching, music and footy keeps me alive .Thanks for that mate, I feel better already .
Glad it resonated with you Raymond 👍🏻
I found this very useful. I'm 73, never been diagnosed but pretty sure I'm autistic. Social situations so painful. I'm best with structure and routine, very much thrown if these change. Thank you
Thank you for making a video that describes the symptoms in adults. I'm 30 and currently on the waiting list to see a specialist. My mother described me as a very normal child in her eyes, but to be honest I think she shares some autistic traits too. She has always been quite emotionally unavailable, like me. I've never fit in or had any close friends or relationship with the opposite sex. In school I was very withdrawn from others, and was very disinterested in everything, apart from having a huge obsession with niche film genres and video editing. In school I would occasionally have these laughing fits during classes for no reason, and was always getting in trouble for it. I also went through bullying. It's funny you mention about sensitivity to light too. I cannot, under any circumstances sleep in a room where there is any light, and this goes back all the way to childhood. My main problems I face now are interacting with people. I have no clue how to have 'banter' with people, and only really engage in conversation if I hear people discussing a particular subject matter I'm interested in. Lastly I always like to know my hours at work in advance. If my boss rings me up in the morning and asks me to cover a shift that same day, I always refuse to work it. Even if I'm not doing anything else much on that day. 😄
Thank you for sharing. Let me know how you get on 👍🏻
I learned good social skills early but still find social interactions to be pointless and mostly confusing . I’m 39 and I’ve simply started isolating more as people don’t respect my social boundaries
@TynesideLife I finally got my diagnosis 2 weeks ago. Yes I am autistic.
I was just diagnosed after I saw a CZcams video and realized almost everything on the chart was me. I'm 42. I have a career but I desperately want a new job. The economy isn't great for looking though as I've been trying diligently for 10 months. Thankfully, I haven't gone through a bad burnout but I've been teetering for a couple of years. I look at autism like a super power too. It's made me very good at my job but I do struggle with wanting to be around people. I can mask and do it, but it takes a huge toll. Covid really highlighted how much energy I spend on it and now that the world is going back to normal, it's really hard.
I literally just found out 2 days ago that I have Autism and I've been processing this by gathering information - your video has helped the most by far.
Thank you for making this video it's so helpful!
That means a lot! Thank you.
I hope you manage a positive way forward 👍🏻🤛🏻
@@TynesideLife thank you! It's a 50\50 pull - part of me now understands why I couldn't be like regular people - but it's being bit by that part of me that wishes I could get a do-over... 😅 But at least I know why things have been getting so much worse lately... Thank you for helping a missed generation! 💚🙏🙂
@@wipalo.the.artist 🙏
Recently diagnosed at age 50. Enjoyed your video. I’ve found being diagnosed so valuable/exciting. One think I’m hoping to do is find other late diagnosed people to meet and share the experience with.
That’s a great idea Stuart 🤛🏻
Well explained. It's helpful to see how many in the comments have only finally been diagnosed with ASD in their 30's and beyond.
🙏
Hi Eddy, I was in the Police myself but only for a short time, for reasons I will go into shortly.
When I look back over my adult life I can see that it was filled with anxiety and depression, and at the age of 37 I was working in an office job which was fairly mundane but secure. At this time I decided to apply for the Police and my application was accepted, I didn't even really feel excited or even that pleased. After initial training I was put on uniform patrol at the station I was assigned to, this is where my issues began to cause major difficulties in that I found everything about the job extremely overwhelming , but I just tried to carry on as best as I could, although I did got to my doctor who prescribed anti depressants. Anyway my career as a bobby ,needless to say only lasted a very short time.
Moving onto the present day I have just had a diagnosis for Autism, which does not surprise me, however since then I have noticed that symptoms that were probably there all along ,have now become much more noticable. Maybe this is just a case of having to readjust? Your video is great. I think it's easier for men to relate to other males of similar age when talking about experiences of Autism.
Cheers
Thank you for sharing Kevin 🤛🏻 if you visit my website I’ve write an article that goes into a lot more detail that I think you may find interesting 👍🏻
@@TynesideLife Thanks Terry, I will take a look.
Enjoyed the life advice and your matter of fact approach, very positive way of looking at a life long debilitation.
Autism can be your superpower 😊!!
I am going to get diagnosed this year I have suffered with learning disabilities since kindergarten. I got held back in kindergarten and put in the special ed program in third grade all through school. I was born in 1974. My parents didn't want to get me tested for anything. My school diagnose me with dyslexia and ADHD. And over the years I've just been different as they would say to everyone. I get obsessive about my crafts and my hobbies. I've had routine jobs mostly in food and beverage my whole life. I don't have any super close friends and have always been awkward. I am 48 now and have had so many difficulties in my life with how my brain works, so it will be nice to know if this is what I have.. Make so much sense, the way I talk to people, not saying hi just blurting out random things about myself or stories that they don't even want to know
Great message thank you. Let me know how you get on please
I have just had my first meeting to confirm/deny autism. I am hopeful....
I have suffered with anxiety and depression for years and didn't know why I couldn't get better. After a very common visit to my doctors he asked if I would like to see a mental health specialist at the surgery. I said yes because it was in familiar surroundings and I would not be so anxious . I thought she would tell me to try different anxiety tablets or something similar. What she told me was I bet a million pounds you are on the autism and ADHD spectrum. This totally shocked me, I am 64 years old and never considered it.
I am currently waiting for test results and more appointments, I am really not sure how to react, at least I know now but 64
years of living like this.
I'm
Thank you for sharing and I hope things get resolved for you
3 months after your comment how's it all going ? ( Results and appointment wise) and generally too
Well said. Your on the money. I acknowledge myself and do not make excuses for it. While I still get caught up in all the noise I create for myself and the stress it can create for those around me. I do accept responsibility.
I apologize sincerely and move forward.
You / We are beings of the moment. Looking back in regret will not clear the path you will walk tomorrow.
Careful with your thoughts and words.
I need more meditation, I fight myself to make time for myself . There is a lot of chatter between my ears.
I'm 59. and further away from who I thought I would become than ever. I'm blessed with a awesome wife and two children although I quietly long for a dog.
Be You or a simulation of another you.
Love heals.
Great message and thank you for sharing 🙏👊🏻
So identifiable to me, good information, good advise. I like also to some extend, how other content providers on the topic "refraime" ASD as identity and culture, but this gentlemen prefers to take it as a disability, and as he presents it, it rather takes away guilt and stress, than adding judgement and exclusion, as it seems to me. You feel very authentic to me, as I have the impression that I can see in your eyes the immense pain you went through, and you feel very inspiring to me, as I have the impression, that you have really worked your way through integrating ASD to your life, and became "stoic" about it, and have found a place from where live is good. My live is good, too, and I had to fight hard, too, to make my way through life. Thank you for your video. Cheers!
Very kind words thank you 🙏
I am also concerned about the drift towards identity politics, because identity politics promotes a victim narrative, which is not helpful. I'm pretty interested in looking into Stoicism, as he recommends.
I am not concerned about such a shift, when it means to accept oneself and integrate a deviant trait into ones own personality and identity and to meet like-minded people. I also like to accept that traits of mine have an disabilitating effect in terms of my capacity to defend my place in the workplace, social structures etc. But sometimes it is helpfull not to allow someone to call be disabled, if it is only bullying. Than political identiy protection is usefull, isn't it? With "stoic", I meant a the full acceptance of all what is and can't be changed. I did not refer to actual schools of thought. As I am concerned, I train myself in being "stoic" by mindfullness mediation, because I feel, that studying text is not enough. Cheers!
@@steveneardley7541 It is me, thanking you for your helpfull content.
I’m 43yrs and was told yesterday, I have ADHD and Autism
I have always struggled from being a child to now.
I worked from aged 16yrs till May 2022, my working career was cut short, due to an undiagnosed birth defect in my spine, the accident moved the defect, pinching my nerve.
Due to the seriousness of an operation I opted for regular nerve root injections for the rest of my life.
It was the doctors who was managing my pain introduce me to his colleagues, who was a Psychiatrist
Your video I found as I wanted to see how many others have struggled with similar thought patterns, and I used videos to learn as I can read about two pages of a book then I get bored 😂
I really enjoyed your video, thank you 😊
Thank you sharing 🙏
I’ve just been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder at 37. I’m currently on a crossroads in my life in processing it all. I kind of felt alone in trying to figure it all out so today I reached out to an Autism Advice Line and asked for help. My anxiety has been getting bad at times and my mental health is suffering. I’m fed up feeling this way and can’t see masking as a long term solution. Everyone thinks that because I look ok, I’m normal and managing my autism well. If only they could understand how I really am. I feel so consumed by the burnout of masking. I’m hoping that I can get the support I need as feeling this way is wearing me down.
Thank you for sharing Derek 👊🏻🙏
@@TynesideLife Thank you. It’s not been an easy few weeks as I process the news and I have so many questions about things I’ve done and things I do. I guess, it’s normal to go through a rough time post diagnosis before the calmer times come. I’ve been assessed using an anxiety questionnaire and I’ve scored very high with severe anxiety. I’m hoping to get the help I need as it’s depressing feeling so out of control of my feelings and emotions. I appreciate videos like yours talking about autism as for someone newly diagnosed like myself, we know how we feel but not necessarily how to deal with it.
You are without a doubt the only police officer who ever helped me in any way, shape or form, cheers
That’s appreciated thank you. Where are you from?
@@TynesideLife Bristol currently. I'm currently listening to Marcus Aurelius meditations due to your recommendation for stoicism :)
Love the vids keep em coming eddy
👊🏻
Hello, I am 62 and was diagnosed with PTSD and OCD in 2017 by the Veterans Administration due to service in Gulf War I and witnessing the 2013 mass shooting at the Washington Navy Yard where I worked at the time.
They believed the OCD is genetic and presented in adult life after the war. Made some sense to me and after some years of treatment I worsened and lost spouse, work and home.
My point is that I believe I’ve been misdiagnosed and now asking the VA for a reevaluation given the amount of knowledge I’ve gained to express myself more effectively.
Thanks for sharing your experience.
Thanks for sharing Patrick 👍🏻
I was finally diagnosed as autistic last year at the age of 63. My wife had urged me going back a decade to get tested but I put it off for too long. So glad I finally did though. I always knew there was something about the way things were with me but I could never quite put my finger on it. Bullied at school and in some places of work, difficulty holding jobs down, struggling to process information, making so many bad decisions, I could go on and on. Being diagnosed, albeit late in life, was liberation day for me. Now I understand myself as never before. I would urge anyone suspecting they're autistic to get tested.
Thanks for sharing Mark. What testing process did you go through?
I initially approached my GP in 2021 to ask for a referral to the local autism service. I had to fill in a form outlining my symptoms. I then got my initial assessment by the service in December 2021. Here it then usually takes up to 2 years before the second assessment and that was done in my case last September. It was a very involved process but it was quite soon after I was told that I had been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). No-one who knows me was surprised.
I have Asperger’s syndrome high functioning autism I got diagnosed age 15 I am 33 now I struggle interacting with others I have repetitive behaviours and obsessions and anxiety is bad most days but you just have to battle away mate 🙏❤️🌈 this is why am glad I set my channel up one I love my club Newcastle untied also it’s building my confidence up too!
Hello mate. Thanks for your message. I can’t find your channel? What’s it called?
Extremely informative Eddy. Thanks for sharing.
It's extremely hurtful to grow up and live thinking nothing is different with you, even though you can't function. I'm just now going through the evaluation process in my mid 30s. I'm having to work through a lot of shame and guilt along with having to relearn who I am from the ground up because of people pleasing and subconsciously masking for decades. It really takes a toll on the person.
I don't blame my parents or schools or anything for not getting diagnosed because I was a '90s kid. There is so much more information on the subject out there today. I just hope we all can raise awareness so no more autistic children go through what I did.
🤛🏻
@@TynesideLife 🤜 🎆
I am a 59-yo man. I am in the process of getting (Not sure how else to frame this) my ASD diagnosis. My last girlfriend of a year was convinced that I am "on the spectrum" a close friend said to me recently, "I knew you were on the spectrum the minute I met you." I have been in the mental-health system for decades. Why did no one catch this? I have been diagnosed bi-polar, borderline, major depressive disorder with generalized anxiety and OCD. NO one diagnosed me ASD, which, now after watching dozens of ASD videos, I know with 100-percent certainty that I am. ASD is the thread the runs through my life and makes sense of all the pain and chaos/disregulation I have been medicating with alcohol for years. I just learned about masking and stimming that I guess I have been doing my entire life without realizing it. My whole life would have been different, better maybe. Thank you for making videos like this.
Thank you for sharing 🙏
This video has helped me lots, my GP is refering me today to see if in Autistic, this has destroyed my whole life, Thankyou this video has helped me so much
Hope all goes well 🤛🏻
I feel you’re so lucky to have had the foresight to go get a diagnosis. Im 51. I only fell settled because it’s taken this long to mask. I still freak out. Had a panicked reaction to a cleaner coming in to our room ( I’m on holiday )
But I knew I was going and prepared for airport stuff. And I actually have to prepare - things like the shopping centre. If I have to get something from there, I choose which entrance the shop I need is at, and drive to that. Only go in that shop.
Hard. All of it.
Has mental health shoved down my throat. My dad had bipolar/ manic depression.
Tried to kill my sister and I, we escaped got out of the house, after he ripped the phone out of the wall, because we were trying to get help.
At13, 1985, I was diagnosed with depression- definitely wasn’t, I just couldn’t explain why I wouldn’t go to school.
I was then prescribed a tricyclic antidepressant to help with the depression that I didn’t have.
Thank you for sharing
I’m 57 and just diagnosed. I’m Australian and I’d really like to compare your experiences to my own. I think we’re a long way behind the UK in this area.
I will be 65 this year and was only diagnosed ten years ago
Didn't think about the military being congruent with autism due to the routine, I'm 42 now and I'm awaiting assessment, hopefully some questions will get answered, thanks for your video.
Hope you find out soon Aaron
Thx! I too was a soldier and a police officer whole time undiagnosed.
At age 52 I was diagnosed ADHD. Since then I’ve been learning about ND and I’m pretty sure I’m ASD. ASD Testing in progress. I’ve been masking all my life….. I just didn’t know it was called masking. Looking back over live As a Gen x person, I called it survival. The world was not as nice or informed about ND over the past 50 years so people like me were forced to mask. More profoundly impacted ND people were called crazy/ lame/ retarded/ off/ not right in the head/ weirdo/ inept/ idiots, etc. if you’re born in the last 15 to 20 years and ND….. consider yourself fortunate that you’re ND nowadays. Us ND old heads had to blend with NT society like X-men characters… and continueously push down our natural ND “otherness”. I’m age 53 and I feel like my diagnosis was my launch pad…! I am a rocket 🚀
That’s a brilliant message thank you Gary. A lot if that resonates with me 🙏
Thanks for sharing Eddy!
Thank you for this video, it sure helps me out.
My pleasure Ray 🤛🏻
Great video. Very helpful. Many thanks.
🙏
I am a 56 year-old woman And I just found out About 3 1⁄2-4 weeks ago That I was autistic level 2. I was diagnosed with ADD Back in the 70's when they still call it Back then the doctors didn't even think ADHD An autism Could be morbidity And back then they couldn't decide whether I had autism or ADD So they gave me medicine for ADD Which make me like a walking zombie Did not work the medication I don't like autism speaks As I am not something to be cured I am not defective And I like who I am Although some other people may Disagree That disagree is their problem Please stop trying to cure us we don't need cured The things were able to do far outweigh the difficulties in the long run once we accept who we are
Hi, thank you for sharing. Could you describe your diagnosis process for us please
I have just been diagnosed at 32. I find it very difficult to watch these videos as I burst out into tears and become very overwhelmed with emotion. I've had so many meltdowns and continue to do so in all areas of my life. Even with my diagnosis i feel desperately alone and often feel like everything is too much. Im too scared to tell anyone because I'm scared they won't understand and judge me as I am percieved as relatively normal as I have become a master of masking. When I am alone all the stress and anxiety explodes in meltdowns and self harm. I'm sorry to write this but I need an outlet
Thanks for sharing mate. I too suffered from MH issues but I read three books around three years ago that showed me how to change the lens on how I view the world and my place in it. I learned that MH illness is real, with imaginary causes. I recommend you read them.
The courage to be disliked - Fumitake Koga
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck - Mark Manson
Happy - Derren Brown
I also research the life philosophy of Stoicism.
I hope this helps bud
@@TynesideLife thank you, I really appreciate your response. I will look into those books. Thank you for what you do
@@bolamfx good luck with everything
We have often many traits of psychological disorders. These unlike strictly medical conditions exist only as guidelines for the professionals, in reality they exist only thanks to something that becomes conventional thanks to an acquired definition.
Autism in its traits when present is unmistakable and can be a very complicated issue to deal with, no one wants to say otherwise, on the other side, mild autistic traits/asperger’s disease to be diagnosed even in middle aged adults is a much less obvious condition to diagnose. Depression, slightly avoidant personality traits and other subtle but significant disorders are grouped together, diagnosed as Autism and treated with prescription drugs. This is in my opinion a wrong way of proceeding even though it will certainly will make our pharmaceutical companies happy having quickly garnered a new customer base.
These personality traits needs to be investigated by serious introspective work by the individuals effected by them. It is not easy and takes time but the results can be extraordinary and is much better than passive learned helplessness.
For me it worked and after 45 years of mild but persistent depression mixed with other symptoms has made me another person having healed.
If you are feeling these symptoms do not give in to certain diagnoses, learn to heal !!
Very moving. Thanks
Great chat Eddy. That could really help some people.
I hope so. Thank you 🙏
Thank you so much for sharing this
Some people have to wait 4 years for an assessment. I have had to book a private assessment (which cost me £1300). I have had to mask all of my life. I was in the military also; everybody in the military (and cops) hide behind a uniform and to an extent, mask themselves.
Thank you so much for sharing!
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I am 64 and was diagnosed with Asperger's.I would love to know things....mabey this will help.
I was diagnosed this year at 50, and I can not come to terms with it. My last job when I informed them I was autistic was informed by the manager and deputy manager that maybe this job isn't for you, but we'll give it a go, I don't even know who I am after masking for around 40 plus years
Do you know they’re breaking employment law by saying that Nathan? Employers are legally obliged to provide additional support and reasonable adjustments
@TynesideLife I know, but if you're realistic, it's my word against theres, plus I couldn't go through all the process
Yes just got diagnosed last year I wasn’t surprised at all. I never mask because I can’t. I avoid groups of people and people alone. My diagnosis has made me worse.
Sorry to hear that. I’d recommend you look into the life philosophy of Stoicism. It helps me a great deal 👍🏻
It was last year that I discovered that I have autism and am now 70. I know it sounds old, but I have done things different all of my life and find social situations difficult and of course avoided them. I find communication with people odd as if we were communicating on separate planes. Every time I was in a group that was basically a circle, I felt I was sitting on the outside looking in as if though I was not included. I had to wait until everyone stopped talking to talk and then it would be completely quiet so I could say my thing. I found my autism rating of 76% scary as if though all of the sudden my differences start to make sense. I too make videos on youtube, but what is different is that I struggle to keep my thoughts in order as I try to keep it short and wind up being longer that I intended. I have so much going on inside and trying to bring order to it and what to cover next is extra hard for me as I easily get side tracked. One thing for sure now I know why I am different.
I have never fit in and that is also part of those parental and society expectations. I am still in my head stuck dealing with those expectations that have filled my brain on how I am supposed to live and do things. Yes, it is a huge struggle, but I live my life.
Thank you for sharing. What do you mean by 76%? How did you find out you were Autistic?
@@TynesideLife The test I took which was several different ones and they varied, but it was basically how high on the scale of 1-100 of my being autistic. I think I am what is known as a high functioning autistic, but I have to admit I am still learning. It was last year and started hearing a condition of someone in the news being autistic and with that it fit and I went looking for test after test. They varied, but the results was at the high end of the scale and it meant to me things started making sense as to why things were so different for me. I hate to say I was ignorant, but like I said I am still learning.
Hi mate, I took some online tests prior to my official screening and diagnosis.
You should treat these unofficial tests with a pinch of salt. They merely provide a possibility that you may be autistic.
The NHS ADOS tests include face to face observations snd practical experiments with qualified clinicians. These can’t be replicated with online tests.
In the UK there is no such thing as high functioning autism, we are all ASD. Neither is there Aspergers in the UK.
I hope this helps 👍🏻
@@TynesideLifeI ask my psychiatrist if I should be tested. He said it will not change anything and it would not help him or me. If the tests that I took online are consistent with each other in the questions and the results it is a confirmation. When I hear the different people online and youtube give a list of traits, it is surprising how many of them fit for me and of course now make sense what my mother said about me doing thins differently. I have to admit I really like the zoom environment for meetings which allows me to be silent and invisible without the feeling of being invisible in a live circle. Even then it is hard to get a word in when I have one. The OCD in me, makes me focus on the smallest things for no reason.
Online tests don’t cover the observation tests which are a large part of the diagnostic process.
I think your psychiatrist has given you really bad advice and I’m a bit puzzled by it. A diagnosis through the correct procedures will give you a diagnosis that gives you at the very least, employment protections and extra support.
ASD is a registered disability under the Disability at Works Act.
Being hung up on detail is also an Autistic trait and may not be OCD. This is why self diagnosis can put one on a potentially misleading path.
It really is worth getting the correct diagnosis 👍🏻
As a U.S. Air Force and Navy veteran, I was recently diagnosed at fifty-seven. A doctor at the V.A. asked me how I was able to get into the military? How could I answer that? After all, women and girls weren't believed to have ASD, so how would the military at that time know? But I was a little taken back by the doc's question because I don't think ASD should be a barrier to entering the military. Yeah, it wasn't easy, but I did it and had an honorable discharge! 👍🏽
Thank you very much for your comment. I found the military fitted like a glove but how I managed to survive nearly 20 years as a police officer is beyond me.
The last few years were a huge struggle and I was either going to end up being sacked, or becoming very ill.
@@TynesideLife for me the military life was hard because of the sensory overload and my not being good at masking. But the routine, command structure and always knowing what to do was great, the best thing for me! Unfortunately the stress and sensory issues had me badly burned out.
Thanks for the video!!!
👍🏻🙏
The thing I hate about being PDD-NOS and 'masking' well - if I ever decided to get a way from my job and lighten my load somewhere in retail most of my family would regard me a simple loser and stop talking to me because I *clearly* don't have a *real* disability and it would be me going to the dark side, faking something, and getting a check. It's held together with suicide bomber-level circular thinking as if failure to continue accelerating into that would require seppuku. If this is really how NT's are going to treat each other I'm amazed that they don't still haze and beat people in wheel chairs (I think enough of them would if there wasn't a really bright and obvious line around it).
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Hi Eddie thank you for this video I've often wondered why I have lived a life of not fitting in like you say in different situations and other things you have brought up in this video witch I can relate to in my life, I'm going to ask for the test when I'm in the doctor's this week think's again and I very interesting video.
I’m glad it resonated with you Mick and good luck. It took me around 18 months to get the tests and result from asking for it
I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar 30yrs ago but they think it might be BPD? Or Autism ATM I'm waiting to see if I can get on a 12mths apx waiting list for an Autism assessment I've subscribed and will look at your other videos and especially Stoicism it seems something that might benefit me as my emotions fluctuations massively from hour to hour some days, thank you for making these videos
Thanks for sharing Nick. I highly recommend stoicism as a life philosophy. It doesn’t cure Autism but it’s cured me of MH issues 👍🏻
Really good stuff !
🙏
I don’t know if am autistic or if I smoked weed to much. When I was younger they always gave me extra time to finish my exam. I hate big groups but love my friends. I really don’t think I’m autistic but if I was a lot of things would make sense.
thank you very much. meant a lot for me
My pleasure 👍🏻
I've never been diagnosed but im sure I have autism spectrum disorder I was also born premature I always thought I was crazy but then discovered autism disorder and felt like I related to the most for the problems I was having.
Thanks for sharing 🤛🏻
Very interesting video 👍
I've just been diagnosed with autism at the age of 35... Still don't know how to tell my family... 😢😢😢😢
Be proud of being Autistic Juan 🤛🏻
@5 min -- Yes, yes, yes!! Im 70+. Social anxiety never subsides. Psychologists do NOT understand this. They all want you to go to 'group' therapy.
Professionally diagnosed at 48. People laugh at me when I tell them.
How come?
@@TynesideLife because they see me as a "normal" person. Graduate degree, ex wife kids good job. They think I'm silly for saying I'm on the spectrum. Very frustrating.
@@stuckinchaselandia6427 they’re neither your friends, nor people you can trust or rely on. Their opinions matter not
ive though i invented my own personal philosophy as a kid. ive recently discovered on my self discovery journey after surviving a stroke that it is stoicism.
my version of it leand towards Albert Camus concept of abserdism which i call ridiculating.
is Pragmatism the externalised evolution of the philosophy of stoicism?
You’ll need to articulate your idea a little more thoroughly bud as I’m not sure I understand.
Pragmatism to me walks hand in hand with stoicism.
How to be myself, since I have being masking for so long. I don’t even know how to talk to my therapist about that. They diagnosed me with ADHD but I know it is more them that.
It starts with being honest with yourself and taking responsibilities for the decisions you make in life. Then you’re ready to talk 👍🏻
Are you diagnosed Autistic mate?
Can you migate bad behaviour that is aggressive unpredictable or volatile under the spectrum???
Absolutely.
Even if one knows they’re autistic it can be very stressful in situations that trigger particular traits. Feelings of being overwhelmed, of stupidity and confusion can raise stress levels significantly. In addition, masking is an exhausting social survival mechanism that can take its toll. All of this can lead to angry, or even aggressive outbursts.
Bring autistic and not knowing is even worse, as one is being treat, measured and judged as neurotypical (normal). In addition, not knowing is even more exhausting and not being aware or being able to mitigate certain situations can have a devastating impact on someone who is ASD, but is unaware.
lovely
I think im autistic. Never looked for help. Just the old "roll your sleeves up & get on with it" I wonder though, what benefit is there to being diagnosed? What changes? I will likely just keep cracking on.
It helps you understand yourself more deeply, what your limitations, or triggers may be.
It helps others understand you a little better too as being autistic can cause significant difficulties in personal and professional relationships.
At the very least, being recognised as having a learning disability, provides employment protections and additional support
I think you're right. If people knew I was autistic they would maybe then not treat me like I'm unsociable & ignorant. I hate people thinking about me like that & I try to fit in & mask but I can't. Believe it or not I actually coach a kids football team as well. I'm great at organising & running the team, shouting out instructions etc. Absolute garbage at team talks or speaking to parents though
Thanks!
Thank you so much 🙏
@@TynesideLife I'm over 50 as well, and just came to realize I'm on the spectrum. What's also cool, though, is that my mum and dad are from Gateshead and Newcastle, my oldest son is named Jordy in tribute to his grandparents. It's really cool to see the vast content you have on the history of my roots. I've subscribed and you can bet I'll be watching lots more. Thank you for making it.
Thank you…. I have been thru a lot of family trauma the past 2 years and in journaling and remembering bits and pieces of my childhood, I suspect I have autism….(the boxes all need to be checked)…. Hmmm…
You should try and get a diagnosis Laura
Thanks for sharing. Is there any chance you can share which aspects of your undiagnosed autism were causing you difficulties in your life from your 30s and after?
Hi mate, if you drop me an email and tell me a little about yourself and your interest in the subject and I’ll happily share some info.
Many thanks
@@TynesideLife thanks I will do. How can I drop you an email, I don’t know it?
@@Hypnobreast on my CZcams homepage bud 👍🏻
@@TynesideLife brilliant, thank you mate. I’ll email you tomorrow
@@TynesideLife thanks. I did email you. Not sure if you received it yet?
How do I unmask? I was told earlier today that I might have autism. I talk to a therapist next week to find out more. I feel angry and overwhelmed at this diagnosis and I don't know what to do
Hi John, at the moment you haven’t been diagnosed as being Autistic (ASD). The full ADOS test is a lengthy process for a diagnosis (assuming you’re in the UK).
@@TynesideLife I'm in the U.S. so I don't know if there's any kind of test over here that I can take
I’m not sure of the US process but I’m sure you’ll be able to Google some information.
Autism can only be diagnosed with specific face to face tests and observations and not merely someone having a chat and telling you that you’re autistic.
Misdiagnosis can lead you to confusion and anger. I hope you receive the support you need 👍🏻
i believe i am some what autistic i dont feel a need to listen to noise, i dont feel a need for body contact male or female, i hide behind a front, to others i am a party person. friends i dont make or they dont last, but i will have to live with this as i am in my eighties, by the way i am a female
Thank you for sharing Iris 🙏
My son mild outism my hear pilipinas very intelligent old 17 grade 6 always pray for God's protection my son because I'm no money because I'm foor
Hi Eddie my 5 year old girl has Autism we got her diagnosis with the Toby Henderson Trust.
Thank you for sharing Amanda
I was just diagnosed at 61
Thanks for sharing Steve 🤛🏻
I'm a sober benzo addict. I resent my PDD-NOS diagnosis.
You’ll need to elaborate mate
@@TynesideLife I was put on benzos to sleep due to my ASD diagnosis. I got so addicted that I almost went into Heroine. I decided to go AA meetings after it. Barely escaped the worst off it. If that covers it.
@@Skoopyghost hope you’re okay now bud?
@@TynesideLife I am.
I’m about to start the path to getting a diagnosis at 45
Good luck Ray 👍🏻
im 47 and life has been complicated……im starting to wander if im austiic……it would make sense given how awkward i am
I’d speak to your GP Jamie 👍🏻
Fuck me, this is me talking, struggled as a kid, 9 yrs in the army then then 20 yrs in the police before i realised, i must be in the same bracket (not cos im from the north east)
i feel the same and experience everything like you but cant explain it, with time off work and counselling, i need to be tested, i need answers
Thanks for sharing Gary 👍🏻
Stoicism and also if it’s a fit for you… Taoism.
Does anyone know where I can find a legit Online diagnosis test ?
You won’t find one mate. You have to do the ADOS test by qualified clinicians and that can’t be gone online.
Any Autism test you do online will merely be a signifier, not a diagnosis
sorry what was the meaning of the girl at the end of your video 8:09
You’ll need to remind me Steve cheers
@@TynesideLife hi Eddie what was your meaning of the girl at the end of your video 8:09 click on the 8:09 to see the bit l'm talking about . thanks mate.
@@stevegreenwood7837 ahh that’s Greta Thunberg, the climate activist. She’s Autistic and (regardless of one’s political beliefs) has driven her to achieve world changing movements
How do I help my partner please.
Hi Mary, in which way?
Do you have a photo ID Disability card?
No. Why do you ask?
@@TynesideLife I've just been diagnosed aged 35. Just exploring what happens next. Wanted to know if it would be worth getting the disability card.
The following are entitled to a Disability Card.
If you have a physical or mental impairment that has a ‘substantial’ and ‘long-term’ negative effect on your ability to do normal daily activities then you are eligible.
If you feel that you’re in this category then you should apply through the Government website 👍🏻
@@TynesideLife Thank you, Mate.
You should lose the background "music." It's distracting and confusing.
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