My self care things are 1. Listening to a podcast/audiobook on a daily walk with my daughter in the stroller (even through our cold Midwest winter), and 2. Grocery shopping alone on the weekends while my husband watches our daughter. I know grocery shopping isn’t “supposed to be” self care for moms but I love having the time to myself, having a checklist, and being able to take my time without anyone relying on me.
I am a drive to coffee mom. Or drive to anywhere for no reason mom if I need it. If I’m overwhelmed, I load my crotch trophies in the suv and go. And it feel like a mini break from responsibility. Don’t have to go far or have a purpose. But just getting a drink or a snack somewhere and listening to music or a podcast while they’re content in their seats can be SO refreshing. And usually it ends becoming something more like stopping at a playground, chilling by a construction site to watch the cool trucks, going into a store to let them play in the toy aisle (which has also made it so my oldest doesn’t whine and demand getting a toy. He’s totally cool with just playing and leaving the toys). And man, if they BOTH fall asleep during the pointless drive and I can park, drink my coffee in pure peace, journal or listen to a podcast. Man…pure heaven.
My husband and I have an agreement, I put our 1 year old to bed and then I go to our room for an hour of alone/quiet time, while he spends time with our 2 year old before bed. It’s helped my mental health so much 🙌🏻 btw love your hair
Thank you for saying self care doesn't have to be away from your kids!! Im pregnant with my second and loving the stage my first is in so I'm trying to soak up as much time with him as I can, and it really does fill me up to do things with him and see him excited!! When his grandparents offer to give me alone time I'm always grateful but never know what to do with it because everything I like doing right now, I like taking him with me 😅
I love the one not being responsible for anything for a while! For me, that was the biggest change of my life when our baby girl was born. I went sleeping yesterday night with thinking about this: there will be no day anymore not being responsible for her - it scares me a bit to be honest.
Hey! I’m a mom of two very similar ages to yours. Love this!! I recently completed an anxiety program and we phrased it as spending more energy on your values. First you have to figure out what they are then you can align your actions with moving toward them! For instance… one of mine (and sounds like yours) is order. So cleaning my house does get me closer toward my value of order. For someone else that may not be something they value. Another one of mine is adventure. Before kids that looked like packing up and going to Colorado for the weekend. Now as a mom it looks like finding a new park to go to. I have the same values (mostly) that I did before becoming a mom. Now I am learning to shift the perspective to get closer to my values through the lense of a mom!
This is really great! I love the idea that our values don't change from becoming a mom and it's more how we apply them. Did you use some sort of method to help you to be able to articulate your values so well?
@@PriPicz exactly! I love knowing I’m still me. Just mom version of me lol yes, the founder of the program I was in created her own method but I can’t find it online anywhere. There are some quizzes online for core values that may give the same results!
I'm the mom home 24/7 with my 5 kids. Homeschooling because seeing the light click in their eyes when they get it, is the ultimate! But sometimes I need a little quiet so standing outside in the snow or no radio in the car on the rare occasions I run errands alone is therapeutic.😄 Also nursing and cuddling the babies under 2 was so precious. They are all too big now but I treasured it.❤ Plus my husband is still my favorite person and he is a safe place for me, so being with him recharges me too. You're doing great Shayla!
Self care can also be literal care tasks that you need to do for yourself. I remember being in the throws of the newborn stage with my twins and having a hard time doing ANYthing for myself. If your self care is just getti g your clothes changed and teeth brushed you go mama. This journey is a long one, it won't always be like that I promise.
The shower one is great and even when it's not a full spa shower I still keep some eucalyptus steamer spray stuff on the shelf in my shower so even if it's a fast shower it smells amazing and helps me feel a little more relaxed 😌
This is so relatable. I also have this domesticated woman complex- I feel like it's hard to talk about- After leaving a very high level job I worked my whole life for, it's I feel embarrassed and guilty but at the same time I am very confident being a SAHM is everything I want right now. I struggle to find women in the same boat as me with this, maybe because we're all feeling weird about it.
Maybe it is not the same. I was working in Peru and for my husband, I need to move to Spain, the company that I was working has another place in France, so that company let me work for France and Peru, the thing is in Peru I was still the boss to my department, and for France i was an assistant administrative. But with the baby was difficult for the difference time (people wrote to my after my working hours, normal, in Peru was the working hours) so I decided to quit that position and be an administrative assistant to the place in France. People maybe don't understand, i'm still working i do not have the same responsibilities that before and i have time with my baby and family, for me is a win win, i like to work (me time) but i'm not sacrificing no more the time with my family :)
So many good ideas, Shayla! I’ve come recently to accept that often my biggest need is to be fully alone and play video games. I didn’t allow myself to feel ok about it for a long time because of the idea that video games are a “time suck/black hole” type activity (among other stigmas). But once I get a bit of time to be fully alone and fully immersed in a game, I’m a new woman and come back to my family so refreshed 🎉
I cut 16 inches of hair off to donate when I was in my late teens. Years later I ran across the stylist who cut my hair and she said she completely forgot to donate the hair and eventually threw it away. I was devastated. 😭
Omg lie to meeee hairstylist!!!! I threw mine away one time bc I left it in my car in a target bag and was cleaning out my car at a gas station! 16 inches is A LOT
I love the idea that cleaning the house is self care. I always thought of it as a me problem that I wanted things tidy. But it makes sense to look at it as self care if it is something that brings me peace. I also enjoy having at least 30 minutes to an hour alone in the mornings. Hard with a newborn but definitely want to get back to that once things settle down.
Thank you for this video, it is just the thing I have been craving for - been feeling overwhelmed, with kids age 3.5 and 1.5 and both dad and me working and having no family support. Self-care is relative and different for everyone but these are all very insightful ways of doing it.
Love this! Actually shaved my legs last night just because I was feeling blah! I like that you mentioned having a clean house is “self care” because yeah I feel better when my house is clean!
The clean house for me. I love that. Doing my workout usually with Lincoln and I love it 💝 just sitting or laying with my eyes closed. I hate scrolling too and I need some boundaries around it because it feels gross. I’m always with the baby so my only quiet time is at bed time but I just stare at how beautiful he is 😍 sometimes we just need to hear we are doing a great job 👏 so all you mamas out there you are doing amazing!!
I realized I have developed learned helplessness and try so hard not to bother my partner bc he comes home from working but I WORK too! I have recently started buying makeup and caring about what I’m wearing again. It has changed so much in my every day life. Moms NEED their partners to also give permission to go take a break instead of us always asking for it. I NEED to workout and haven’t really been able to but I’m starting
Yessssss! Filling your cup is so important and I'm so glad you emphasized the fact that it looks different for everyone 🙌 My treat outside of the home without my toddler - going to a wine farm once a month with my girlfriends, on a Saturday afternoon, just chatting, snacking and enjoying ourselves!
Shayla, you make me laugh! The comment about the strip of hair on your leg... 🤣🤣Thank you. Hair looks great, and YES so much pressure to make self-care look perfect. Hubs even agreed. Watching her learn to eat has been the funnest, silliest, messiest time so far. Contact naps are also a fav time to rest and recover. Snuggles and relax time, I'll take it!
I sometimes think of myself as a Sim, like from the Sims (the computer game), when trying to figure out what I need right now. I am low on sleep, hygiene, social interaction, etc? I realized that I have different cups which run low from time to time and which are filled by different things. For example, I am a very extroverted person and I go to choir every week. These are also my best friends, so if something is bothering me I have people to talk to after rehearsal. This is working great for me and my husband is fine bringing our son to bed. But I am pregnant right now and I am really courious how it will work out with two kids. I want to try to bring my second one with me to choir as long as she is little. A friend did that and it worked great. Her daughter justed napped in the carrier, while mum was singing. I really hope that will work for me as well.
Filling your cup feels kind of impossible some days, I love how you talk about just working it in where you can! And fyi, just learned about “downtime” on the iPhone and it changed me lol. You basically can set times to lock all your apps (minus the actual phone/text and any apps you add to the “exceptions” area). I only allow CZcams and my audiobooks apps from 5 am to 5pm and feel like I’ve been soooooo much more productive and happier :)
Thank you so much for your channel. Thank you for your podcast. I am ever grateful that I've found you. I never grew up around babies or kids and I've really gone into this journey knowing nothing and have no family around to help me understand some things. With social media I felt like I was constantly failing in all aspects of my life and it was very stressful because I was giving everything I had but it was never enough. It has been extremely helpful for me to watch your videos and listen to your podcast. So again thank you.
Everyone is different and what work for one person may not work for another. Also i think some people think self care is this big idea like a spa day but in fact it can be simple as a walk, mediation or having a cuppa tea/coffee that's actually hot.
I really needed to see this video. I feel like I can never be open about how much I enjoy spending time with my daughter and cleaning the house because people are always complaining about their kids and houses and I don’t want to come off as little miss optimistic LOL 😊
My self-care has continued to be playing with makeup at least once a week while my baby is asleep. It gives me a way to clear my mind as I get to tap into my creativity.
Your hair is so pretty! 💕 honestly, I am happy to get coffee in the morning, get two showers a week and I love to be outside. Fellow Minnesotan here and this winter has been the longest of my life (first time mom, daughter just turned one) so I’m PATIENTLY waiting for spring to come and be able to bird watch with my daughter in the carrier and garden. My cup will be overflowing when the snow melts!!
Hey! Did you know there are 7 different types of rest? Social, Spiritual, Physical, Sensory, Emotional, Mental and Creative. So when you feel like you need a break, some self care or your cup to be filled up, take a look at this list and see, am I lacking in any of these areas? That's also why sometimes you go and do self-care or fill up your cup and you don't always feel fully better afterwards, it's probably because you didn't get enough of the 'right' rest. Also, if you have anxiety that manifests physically, cleaning your house is great because you're doing something physical to release it AND your clean house, visually speaking, brings in the peace and calm you need after. It's a win-win and definitely something I enjoy as well 😊
So much yes! Self care can feel like just another chore. But then I have to step back and think “it’s something that doesn’t feel like a chore” and we all need a little push to do GOOD things too. I’ve got it down to being able to do NEARLY every with my kid around (2.5 years). All except going on my laptop or tablet- even then I think I could if I stood at the kitchen counter with it. But I love hearing other people’s ideas too! When I became a mom I WAYYY 🆙 my self care. Which is funny that most people took it all away. But I knew (and heard enough) to stick to it. Love my morning and night routines ❤ it’s hilarious and enjoyable to see my daughter reenact doing skin care and deep breaths 🥹 and I tell myself how important it is for her to see me taking good care of myself
Great listen, thank you. Going to sit with hubby so we can each make a list of at least 3 things that fills each of our cups, and make that list visible. Then make arrangements for the week so that we can each get that time in
I don't even drink coffee normally and even gave up caffeine for Lent. But multiple times, I have gotten my kids in the car and driven to get a decaf latte just to get out with the kids. Definitely adds to my cup.
Girl thank you for all of your videos. You’re like my 3rd sister. I just subscribed and I’m shook because I thought I already was. So just know you have even more subscribers out there lol Love all of the support for every type of mother. ❤
I cried today watching your video because I don’t have a dishwasher 😭😭😭😂😂😂 First world problems! 🤦🏼♀️ 🤣 I guess that means that a clean kitchen is one of the things that fills my cup.
But when are you going to host a MN meet up!?! Pleeeease! Apparently there's a cafe in Maple Grove that has a kids play area. It's called Minisota Play Cafe. Could be a great location for a meet up.
I think the culture of “self care” is part of the problem. We hear people on social media talking about self care and then we feel jealous or like we are missing out on something if we don’t make a big production of doing something for ourselves. Sometimes being a mom and wife means putting your family first and that’s going to mean you have less time for yourself. It’s a choice and part of the sacrifice and that’s not bad. It’s an honour and something to be grateful for. Our moms and generations before us didn’t talk about “self care”. They just took care of what needed to be done and sometimes that means doing something for yourself too. You don’t have to make a big thing of it. Same for dads and partners. I think making it this big event of self care is the problem.
@@heyshayla oh yes absolutely! I did watch and just commiserating with the state of things today. It made me sad to see you questioning yourself wondering if cleaning can count as self care. We don’t have to run things by others or our therapist to know if it’s okay or “counts”. I think we should eliminate the words self care altogether. It’s just living life. Feminism has taught women that you shouldn’t be “domesticated” and makes us feel like we are supposed to strive for more and that just makes so many women unhappy. It’s sad. I’m perfectly happy in my traditional role and I think a lot of other women would be a lot happier if they forgot about what modern feminism has taught them they are supposed to do.
Just wondering what your thoughts are on safety razors? It's the most eco-option for shaving, plastic free and you can often send the blades back to the company so they can recycle them. Takes a bit of practice, can't be done in a rush, but perfect for a bit of me-time as it makes you slow down.
I like my husband to hold the newborn and I snuggle my toddler to sleep. I love snuggling and miss it when I have to be up nursing the baby. I also like making my nespresso every morning, it’s a ritual to me.
Literally it’s dirty with dry shampoo lol the dry shampoo is vegamour but I know nothing about them they just sent it to me. I’m going to try sprinkling arrow root in there lol
Thanks again to Harry’s! Click here harrys.com/heyshayla to redeem your Trial Set for just $5!
Harry's are great! And that IS a great deal!
My self care things are 1. Listening to a podcast/audiobook on a daily walk with my daughter in the stroller (even through our cold Midwest winter), and 2. Grocery shopping alone on the weekends while my husband watches our daughter. I know grocery shopping isn’t “supposed to be” self care for moms but I love having the time to myself, having a checklist, and being able to take my time without anyone relying on me.
I think it counts if you feel better after 👏👏👏🙌🙌🙌 sounds like a dream to me lol
I am a drive to coffee mom. Or drive to anywhere for no reason mom if I need it. If I’m overwhelmed, I load my crotch trophies in the suv and go. And it feel like a mini break from responsibility. Don’t have to go far or have a purpose. But just getting a drink or a snack somewhere and listening to music or a podcast while they’re content in their seats can be SO refreshing. And usually it ends becoming something more like stopping at a playground, chilling by a construction site to watch the cool trucks, going into a store to let them play in the toy aisle (which has also made it so my oldest doesn’t whine and demand getting a toy. He’s totally cool with just playing and leaving the toys). And man, if they BOTH fall asleep during the pointless drive and I can park, drink my coffee in pure peace, journal or listen to a podcast. Man…pure heaven.
My husband and I have an agreement, I put our 1 year old to bed and then I go to our room for an hour of alone/quiet time, while he spends time with our 2 year old before bed. It’s helped my mental health so much 🙌🏻 btw love your hair
Thank you for saying self care doesn't have to be away from your kids!! Im pregnant with my second and loving the stage my first is in so I'm trying to soak up as much time with him as I can, and it really does fill me up to do things with him and see him excited!! When his grandparents offer to give me alone time I'm always grateful but never know what to do with it because everything I like doing right now, I like taking him with me 😅
I love the one not being responsible for anything for a while! For me, that was the biggest change of my life when our baby girl was born. I went sleeping yesterday night with thinking about this: there will be no day anymore not being responsible for her - it scares me a bit to be honest.
Hey! I’m a mom of two very similar ages to yours. Love this!!
I recently completed an anxiety program and we phrased it as spending more energy on your values.
First you have to figure out what they are then you can align your actions with moving toward them! For instance… one of mine (and sounds like yours) is order. So cleaning my house does get me closer toward my value of order. For someone else that may not be something they value. Another one of mine is adventure. Before kids that looked like packing up and going to Colorado for the weekend. Now as a mom it looks like finding a new park to go to.
I have the same values (mostly) that I did before becoming a mom. Now I am learning to shift the perspective to get closer to my values through the lense of a mom!
Oh words I love this!
This is really great! I love the idea that our values don't change from becoming a mom and it's more how we apply them. Did you use some sort of method to help you to be able to articulate your values so well?
Love this advice I am going to pinpoint my values and apply this, sounds like just the thing I needed.
@@PriPicz exactly! I love knowing I’m still me. Just mom version of me lol yes, the founder of the program I was in created her own method but I can’t find it online anywhere. There are some quizzes online for core values that may give the same results!
I'm the mom home 24/7 with my 5 kids. Homeschooling because seeing the light click in their eyes when they get it, is the ultimate! But sometimes I need a little quiet so standing outside in the snow or no radio in the car on the rare occasions I run errands alone is therapeutic.😄 Also nursing and cuddling the babies under 2 was so precious. They are all too big now but I treasured it.❤ Plus my husband is still my favorite person and he is a safe place for me, so being with him recharges me too.
You're doing great Shayla!
This is so helpful!!! I wonder how ppl with more do it 😅😂❤️ thank you!
Self care can also be literal care tasks that you need to do for yourself. I remember being in the throws of the newborn stage with my twins and having a hard time doing ANYthing for myself. If your self care is just getti g your clothes changed and teeth brushed you go mama. This journey is a long one, it won't always be like that I promise.
The shower one is great and even when it's not a full spa shower I still keep some eucalyptus steamer spray stuff on the shelf in my shower so even if it's a fast shower it smells amazing and helps me feel a little more relaxed 😌
This is so relatable. I also have this domesticated woman complex- I feel like it's hard to talk about- After leaving a very high level job I worked my whole life for, it's I feel embarrassed and guilty but at the same time I am very confident being a SAHM is everything I want right now. I struggle to find women in the same boat as me with this, maybe because we're all feeling weird about it.
Maybe it is not the same. I was working in Peru and for my husband, I need to move to Spain, the company that I was working has another place in France, so that company let me work for France and Peru, the thing is in Peru I was still the boss to my department, and for France i was an assistant administrative. But with the baby was difficult for the difference time (people wrote to my after my working hours, normal, in Peru was the working hours) so I decided to quit that position and be an administrative assistant to the place in France.
People maybe don't understand, i'm still working i do not have the same responsibilities that before and i have time with my baby and family, for me is a win win, i like to work (me time) but i'm not sacrificing no more the time with my family :)
So many good ideas, Shayla! I’ve come recently to accept that often my biggest need is to be fully alone and play video games. I didn’t allow myself to feel ok about it for a long time because of the idea that video games are a “time suck/black hole” type activity (among other stigmas). But once I get a bit of time to be fully alone and fully immersed in a game, I’m a new woman and come back to my family so refreshed 🎉
I cut 16 inches of hair off to donate when I was in my late teens. Years later I ran across the stylist who cut my hair and she said she completely forgot to donate the hair and eventually threw it away. I was devastated. 😭
Omg lie to meeee hairstylist!!!!
I threw mine away one time bc I left it in my car in a target bag and was cleaning out my car at a gas station!
16 inches is A LOT
I love the idea that cleaning the house is self care. I always thought of it as a me problem that I wanted things tidy. But it makes sense to look at it as self care if it is something that brings me peace. I also enjoy having at least 30 minutes to an hour alone in the mornings. Hard with a newborn but definitely want to get back to that once things settle down.
Coffee fills my cup. literally and figuratively.
Looking forward to this! As a first time mum with a 1 month old self care for me would be a hot bath, a meal eaten hot and a hot cup of tea!
Omg when you said cleaning your house Makes you happy I was like ... SAME
Thank you for this video, it is just the thing I have been craving for - been feeling overwhelmed, with kids age 3.5 and 1.5 and both dad and me working and having no family support. Self-care is relative and different for everyone but these are all very insightful ways of doing it.
Love this! Actually shaved my legs last night just because I was feeling blah! I like that you mentioned having a clean house is “self care” because yeah I feel better when my house is clean!
The clean house for me. I love that. Doing my workout usually with Lincoln and I love it 💝 just sitting or laying with my eyes closed. I hate scrolling too and I need some boundaries around it because it feels gross. I’m always with the baby so my only quiet time is at bed time but I just stare at how beautiful he is 😍 sometimes we just need to hear we are doing a great job 👏 so all you mamas out there you are doing amazing!!
I’ve found that getting on IG on the safari app instead of IG gets boring real quick!! Reels don’t automatically play!
I realized I have developed learned helplessness and try so hard not to bother my partner bc he comes home from working but I WORK too! I have recently started buying makeup and caring about what I’m wearing again. It has changed so much in my every day life.
Moms NEED their partners to also give permission to go take a break instead of us always asking for it.
I NEED to workout and haven’t really been able to but I’m starting
Yessssss! Filling your cup is so important and I'm so glad you emphasized the fact that it looks different for everyone 🙌 My treat outside of the home without my toddler - going to a wine farm once a month with my girlfriends, on a Saturday afternoon, just chatting, snacking and enjoying ourselves!
Shayla, you make me laugh! The comment about the strip of hair on your leg... 🤣🤣Thank you. Hair looks great, and YES so much pressure to make self-care look perfect. Hubs even agreed. Watching her learn to eat has been the funnest, silliest, messiest time so far. Contact naps are also a fav time to rest and recover. Snuggles and relax time, I'll take it!
I love how inclusive, thoughtful, down to earth real person you are
My soul manifested this video at this very moment. So grateful to watch it, such a reminder to me to fill my cup, will be doing more of those things!
I sometimes think of myself as a Sim, like from the Sims (the computer game), when trying to figure out what I need right now. I am low on sleep, hygiene, social interaction, etc? I realized that I have different cups which run low from time to time and which are filled by different things. For example, I am a very extroverted person and I go to choir every week. These are also my best friends, so if something is bothering me I have people to talk to after rehearsal. This is working great for me and my husband is fine bringing our son to bed. But I am pregnant right now and I am really courious how it will work out with two kids. I want to try to bring my second one with me to choir as long as she is little. A friend did that and it worked great. Her daughter justed napped in the carrier, while mum was singing. I really hope that will work for me as well.
I agree that cleaning the house is self-care. I can't function with a messy/dirty house.
Filling your cup feels kind of impossible some days, I love how you talk about just working it in where you can! And fyi, just learned about “downtime” on the iPhone and it changed me lol. You basically can set times to lock all your apps (minus the actual phone/text and any apps you add to the “exceptions” area). I only allow CZcams and my audiobooks apps from 5 am to 5pm and feel like I’ve been soooooo much more productive and happier :)
Thank you so much for your channel. Thank you for your podcast. I am ever grateful that I've found you. I never grew up around babies or kids and I've really gone into this journey knowing nothing and have no family around to help me understand some things. With social media I felt like I was constantly failing in all aspects of my life and it was very stressful because I was giving everything I had but it was never enough. It has been extremely helpful for me to watch your videos and listen to your podcast. So again thank you.
😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️
Everyone is different and what work for one person may not work for another. Also i think some people think self care is this big idea like a spa day but in fact it can be simple as a walk, mediation or having a cuppa tea/coffee that's actually hot.
TOTALLU AGREE!!
I really needed to see this video. I feel like I can never be open about how much I enjoy spending time with my daughter and cleaning the house because people are always complaining about their kids and houses and I don’t want to come off as little miss optimistic LOL 😊
Yes!!!
My self-care has continued to be playing with makeup at least once a week while my baby is asleep. It gives me a way to clear my mind as I get to tap into my creativity.
🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌
I needed to hear ALL of this. Thank you 🙌
Your hair is so pretty! 💕 honestly, I am happy to get coffee in the morning, get two showers a week and I love to be outside. Fellow Minnesotan here and this winter has been the longest of my life (first time mom, daughter just turned one) so I’m PATIENTLY waiting for spring to come and be able to bird watch with my daughter in the carrier and garden. My cup will be overflowing when the snow melts!!
Hahaha LONGEST WINTER EVER RRRRR
Hey! Did you know there are 7 different types of rest? Social, Spiritual, Physical, Sensory, Emotional, Mental and Creative. So when you feel like you need a break, some self care or your cup to be filled up, take a look at this list and see, am I lacking in any of these areas? That's also why sometimes you go and do self-care or fill up your cup and you don't always feel fully better afterwards, it's probably because you didn't get enough of the 'right' rest. Also, if you have anxiety that manifests physically, cleaning your house is great because you're doing something physical to release it AND your clean house, visually speaking, brings in the peace and calm you need after. It's a win-win and definitely something I enjoy as well 😊
Wow this is cool and helpful! Thank you!
Social events fill my cup top! I am fascinated by life stories and getting to know strangers. My husband is the opposite 😆
So much yes!
Self care can feel like just another chore. But then I have to step back and think “it’s something that doesn’t feel like a chore” and we all need a little push to do GOOD things too.
I’ve got it down to being able to do NEARLY every with my kid around (2.5 years). All except going on my laptop or tablet- even then I think I could if I stood at the kitchen counter with it. But I love hearing other people’s ideas too! When I became a mom I WAYYY 🆙 my self care. Which is funny that most people took it all away. But I knew (and heard enough) to stick to it. Love my morning and night routines ❤ it’s hilarious and enjoyable to see my daughter reenact doing skin care and deep breaths 🥹 and I tell myself how important it is for her to see me taking good care of myself
Love you’re new hair!!
Yes! She looks great
Thanks guys!!!
Great listen, thank you. Going to sit with hubby so we can each make a list of at least 3 things that fills each of our cups, and make that list visible. Then make arrangements for the week so that we can each get that time in
🔥🔥🔥🔥
I don't even drink coffee normally and even gave up caffeine for Lent. But multiple times, I have gotten my kids in the car and driven to get a decaf latte just to get out with the kids. Definitely adds to my cup.
And deleted social media over 1.5 years ago 🎉
Girl thank you for all of your videos. You’re like my 3rd sister. I just subscribed and I’m shook because I thought I already was. So just know you have even more subscribers out there lol
Love all of the support for every type of mother. ❤
😂👏👏👏
Thank you for all your videos, vulnerability energy and honesty ❤
Once again your videos comes at the perfect time, Shayla you get me lol
I NEEDED this today thank you ❤
I cried today watching your video because I don’t have a dishwasher 😭😭😭😂😂😂
First world problems! 🤦🏼♀️ 🤣
I guess that means that a clean kitchen is one of the things that fills my cup.
Epilating and breathing deeply = self care, also reading the scriptures!!!
But when are you going to host a MN meet up!?! Pleeeease! Apparently there's a cafe in Maple Grove that has a kids play area. It's called Minisota Play Cafe. Could be a great location for a meet up.
Ughhh I know I have something planned in May! But doing a meet up with kids would totally be better!
I think the culture of “self care” is part of the problem. We hear people on social media talking about self care and then we feel jealous or like we are missing out on something if we don’t make a big production of doing something for ourselves.
Sometimes being a mom and wife means putting your family first and that’s going to mean you have less time for yourself. It’s a choice and part of the sacrifice and that’s not bad. It’s an honour and something to be grateful for.
Our moms and generations before us didn’t talk about “self care”. They just took care of what needed to be done and sometimes that means doing something for yourself too. You don’t have to make a big thing of it. Same for dads and partners. I think making it this big event of self care is the problem.
If you watched, you’d know I totally agree!
@@heyshayla oh yes absolutely! I did watch and just commiserating with the state of things today.
It made me sad to see you questioning yourself wondering if cleaning can count as self care. We don’t have to run things by others or our therapist to know if it’s okay or “counts”.
I think we should eliminate the words self care altogether. It’s just living life.
Feminism has taught women that you shouldn’t be “domesticated” and makes us feel like we are supposed to strive for more and that just makes so many women unhappy. It’s sad.
I’m perfectly happy in my traditional role and I think a lot of other women would be a lot happier if they forgot about what modern feminism has taught them they are supposed to do.
Love your work Shay! Please talk more about doulas😍😍😍
The mane of leg hair waving in the wind 😂😂😂
This comment tells me you know what Tom talking about!
Just wondering what your thoughts are on safety razors? It's the most eco-option for shaving, plastic free and you can often send the blades back to the company so they can recycle them. Takes a bit of practice, can't be done in a rush, but perfect for a bit of me-time as it makes you slow down.
Love the hair
You are brilliant ❤️
what a great video!
I'm totally the same with my phone!! The struggle is real, gotta be my own mommy haha
Your hair looks so cute 🤗
I love the cut!!!
I like my husband to hold the newborn and I snuggle my toddler to sleep. I love snuggling and miss it when I have to be up nursing the baby. I also like making my nespresso every morning, it’s a ritual to me.
Omgosh I love your hair! How did you get it to have so much volume? Im a new mom and just got 5 inches off and I’m trying to learn how to style it!
Literally it’s dirty with dry shampoo lol the dry shampoo is vegamour but I know nothing about them they just sent it to me. I’m going to try sprinkling arrow root in there lol
Great video!!!! ❤
I’m listening to this as a mom of 1 but she feels like 2 🙃💕
Yessssss😍😍😍😍😍🔥.
can you share a list of books you enjoy?
Yes! Heyshayla.com/books
You look good❤
Shop is not working for me :(
Heyshayla.com/shop
I prefer Jeremy's razors over Harry's. Better product. No wokeness 😊