“No dating till marriage”
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- čas přidán 18. 05. 2022
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#Asian #Comedy #Sketch
What do you think about me telling the stories that inspire the skit in the bloopers? I might make it a recurring thing...
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"You're so useless you make Sakura look like Amazon Prime"
Talk no Jutsu: *Emotional Damage*
EMOTIONAL DAMAGE*
EMOTIONAL DAMAGE
Watashi omae wa fastu kirai
Yorokobe
HA Emotional Damage no jutsu
This guy,
"Thats not enough to sleep"
"Sleep faster"
Wise words from Steven's dad.
batman only needs 2 hours
Then sleep faster, da?
So would u tell me how to sleep faster.....I am busy person
@@see_elsewhere yeah that's the point he is BATMAN
I'm surprised though that Steven's dad didn't tell him to study 25 hours or more.
“Thomas had a girlfriend once.”
“Who’s Thomas? “
“Exactly!”
Makes me die every time
Wait, but he became a famous tank engine, didn't he?
@@siyzerix Exactly
Why you fail dying eeevery time?
this is, very literally, what Asian parents say...
Exactly!
"Magnet... Who you tryna attract!?" Best line 💀👌
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣he’s genius
Ngl, I got a little scared b/c it looked like he stuck a big magnet on the side of a desktop CPU tower and I'm like NOOOOO! THE COMPUTER! Thankfully there must be context I didn't know b/c the magnet didn't appear to erase the hard drive or mess up anything.
Guess they make 'em stronger than they used to.
But not stronger than Steven's dad going to school.
@@spoonimefan some audio component is magnetic, try sticking a fork all over a laptop it will attract somewhere
I expected that
i saw that one coming 😂😂😂
"You know what's better than feelings? A job."
I felt that on a spiritual level
same, time to get 3 jobs
He's totally correct 🤣🤣🤣
Hee is sooooo f**** right =)
Felt that dayum
why have babes when you can have mansion and a tesla.
the social anxiety will last throughout adulthood, _very effective._
I read this in Stevens Voice😂👏
It sure does
VERY
I have it.
Extra emotional damage
“The entire future of family names is on your shoulder at 14” 😢 Cannot believe you have said exact same words my dad told me EMOTIONAL DAMAGE!!!😂❤
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I always felt bad for my asian friends growing up when they would tell me these stories. We would laugh about it together, but at the same time their parents were kinda nuts 🤣
Fr. I got some too and they ALL say the same crap. Its pretty much a universal constant. Asian parents are legitimately the worst
@@meyeneetuks4680 asian parents are giga wtf you talkin bout 💀
Thomas's parents weren't Asian and well.
@@derpisole no they're not i want to run away and never come back!! 😁
well established asian parents are not like these...still these are quite relatable in the culture.
“You don’t need straight pants you need straight A’s” wise words from Steven’s dad
@Stеvеn Не Shorts 🅥 stop
words to live by
@@StevenHe yep
🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@StevenHe damage
bro said sleep faster oh hell nahhhhh 😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣
YESSSS
HAHA
You must shave your record in half. Eight hours becomes four. Four becomes two. Two becomes one. One becomes an entire half hour. Then you can be closer to only a slight failure. No way I’m doing that tho.
@Stеvеn Не 🅥 *DONT CLICK THIS!!*
@@StevenHewhen yr Outtake is more hilarious than yr sketch sometidos idk if ur dying from laughter or u just beinga goofball
"you're so useless, you make sakura look like amazon prime" killed me
does it means he makes sakura looks like a paid service/videos character or something like that?
That killed me too! That was so freaking funny.
@@realreuben126 It's about the usefulness. Amazon prime is really useful and sakura is not.
@@aminaradakov892 Thanks for explaining😃
It ain't funny at all... like... no...
1:35 “You don’t need straight pants,YOU NEED STRAIGHT A’S!” -Stevens dad
"Life is about doing things you hate to make money"
This is the most disturbingly, depressingly accurate line.....EVER.
"Just to flex your stuff on Instagram" was what followed up which made it even worse
So true. Something that our parents like, but that something is what we hate to do. It is a successful job but i have to do it because it is what my parents want, but i don't have to worry about money. Like. Seriously. So now i am not even married coz i hate my pretentious life.
Reminds me the Fight Club scene: "Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need, and the things you own, end up owning you."
The "for someone else" is missing at the end.
so you mean Steven hates being a youtuber? ....or is it just his parents thing ?
Steven gives great message about mental wellness.
Steven's dad: When I went to school, mental health hadn't been invented yet. We didn't get stressed because we had to fight 2 lions on way to school and teach ourselves calculus from back of milk carton. When I was 9 I had 25 years work experience and my left foot was starting a business.
best comment lmfao
don't forget the tyrannosaurus Rex with nunchucks, wait that was the neighbor, his T -Rex didn't have nunchucks😅
@@rzcrete2470 no you were right. Stevens dad fought t-rex w/ nunchucks. The neighbor said "you're t-rex had nunchucks?".
He had to walk uphill both ways in snow climbing a mountain with one foot the other was starting a business 🤣
Now the same two lions are doing his taxes
Steven he - Who's Thomas
Steven he dad - Exactly..
Got me dying to laughter on the floor
This is true. I have an aunt who always gets on my cousin's case about getting married, but every time she talks about dating, my aunt goes into extreme mama bear mode.
"You know whats better than feelings."
"A Job"
No No, he has a point there
fINalLY it's herE
Fuck off bots
“You dont need straight pants! YOU NEED STRAIGHT A’S!!!” Kills me 😂
I wanna leave a like but it's at 666-
Yes!!! That line totally slays me also!😂😂😂
The voice crack tho-
I'm the 1000th like
Always iron your A's... that's how to get good grades ;)
As a man named Thomas...this hit real close to home 🤣
Exactly 😳
1:54
"Magnet....WHO YOU TRYNA ATTRACT?!"
"Thomas even had a girlfriend once"
"Who's Thomas"
"Exactly"
This part got me laughing so hard my parents walked in my room then asked "What are you laughing at?"
Omg same
except the parents walking into my room part
It still was funny tho the way he whipped around and said
B\/
*_"exactly"_*
"What are you laughing at?"
"Thomas"
"Who's Thomas?"
"Exactly"
:))
me too omg too funny
I first read that as “pants walked in”😂😂
@@Sango23 same
"Then sleep faster."
"You so useless you make Sakura seems like Amazon Prime!"
This episode was filled to the brim with gold!
Arnold Schwarzenegger said sleep faster once for a speech or something like at idk. I saved you I'm you're 667 like you are welcome
@@BeargoBrrrr Okay, you are 9yo max, we get it. Sorry to tell you, but Santa isn't real, there isn't a god, or at least, your god isn't real and you are not going to be special, but are just going to be another nobody.
One love ❤️
College students: "Write that down! Write that down!"
@@boyankovachev7982 what the that's why you think I am 9 because I took Jesus as my lord and savior, disgrace full
... What the frick is happening in my replies?
"Life is about doing this u hate for money ,money is for flexing thing on instagram"got me laughing soo much i fell off my bed
1:26 “instagram ok…….WHO YOU TRYNA DM!?”
"Do you know whats better than feelings?!
A JOB!" words of wisdom by - stevens dad
@Stеvеn Не 🅥 czcams.com/video/MrbTXYKh7oc/video.html
As an Asian, I can confirm that my parents will tell me to sleep faster when I don't get enough sleep.
Now I can sleep 8 hours every 60 minutes
+ while reviewing mathematics.
"You know what's better than feelings? A job."
Wiser words were never spoken.
I was not expectin the transition music. And the lil shift in ambience, i dig it
Stephen: "It's not enough to sleep!"
Stephen's dad: "Then sleep faster, eh?"
Also Stephen's dad: "Life is about doing things you hate to make money, ...... then using that money to flex on Instagram."
Damn those got me laughing, very good lines Stephen, keep it up!
"steven"
his name is Steven with 'V'
Day something of trying to get a shoutout from literally anyone cause I made an bebu la intro
@@chamith256 Oops, sorry. I'm british so we spell it different...
Yeah "sleep faster lah!" had me laughing in the street 😂
"Thomas even had a girlfriend once"
"Who's Thomas?"
" *exactly* ."
This line had me dying 😂😂😂😂😂😂
The most underrated line ever😂😂
Less funny to those of us named Tom. Just sayin. He isn't wrong, but, that was at least 8 points in Emotional Damage.
My parents legit have pulled 1000IQ plays like this on me
😂😂😂😂
Magnet... who you tryna attract?!
Steven's dad is taking this way too far.
"Life is about doing things you hate for money, then using that money to flex on Instagram!"
Ahahahhahahaa
Steven's Dad : "You need 20 hours of study"
Steven : "That's not enough time to sleep"
Steven's Dad : "Then sleep faster !"
Life Speedrunners : _"Sir, you're a genius..."_
When i was being homeschooled mom made me study 16 hours a day for the first half of the school year. No breaks, just meals, the occasional bathroom break, and sleep
Nothing that hasn’t been said before
"Sleep faster " is now my motto and advice to my teenager.
@@spencervance8484 ooooooooooooooooooooooooofff
@@s.bgaming6134 ooff indeed
“You don’t need straight pants.”
“You need straight A’s!” That had me laughing
So hard lol 😂
Lol
A is for average. A++ is for Asians.
3:21 As a Chinese female, I wrote 宝宝 to my 闺蜜 once and my mom saw it while scrolling through my phone. And guess what happens, no did not pull out her slipper. But instead pulled out a thin stick out of nowhere and slapped me on the leg. ( A thing that Fuzhou parents do 👍🏻 )
This is sooooo true, one of the best episode so far lol
"Contact lenses, okay okay, who are you trying to see?" I am trying to see how Stephen he makes such incredible content and such amazing jokes.
ah! I see what you did there 😏
@Ba Ba ! no stop doing spam dude
@Guys look👇🅥 its finally here! A reason that this meme should die like the show
@Guys look👇🅥 Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
No joke, the moment I turned 22, my parents, who always strictly told me to NEVER date, asked me if I was gay since I didn't have a girlfriend. And not in a 'we'll support you regardless' manner.
Same bruh :)
Bro! I finally dated at 22 then my family drove us apart. They wonder why I haven't dated since then.
@@generalrendar7290 rip
@@generalrendar7290 oof :(
hi im 16, cant relate yet
edit, i am failing school tho
This is the first skit I have ever seen from you Steven He...and it's already my favorite😸
Steven’s laugh is infectious!
Oh my god, my mother actually did that ending to me. When she came to my college graduation, she asked me why I had no boyfriend prepared and what was wrong with me 😂😭
and then she'll be like you aren't getting younger, it's hard to have kids when you are older. Seriously, who was the one said no dating!!!
the hell did they expecting? You'll get a boyfriend once you graduate from college? Lmao
My Mom is telling me that since I was 16, no big deal
Seems to me that you had plenty of time between your final exam and your graduation.
Where were their grandchildren?
Same thing in India too 😂
"Life is about doing things you hate to make money"
Yes, the way I relate to this so much.
The sad thing is there's a lot of people out there who do things they hate and they still barely get by
"And flex on Instagram."
when you got off work at 11 pm and just wanted to chill for a bit before going to bed, and then that line hit, so you paused the video while pondering on your life
"Then sleep faster" 😂
Not sure if I wanna laugh or hold your hand in a therapy session Steven 😂👍🏽 great content
"dating before college is how you fail school" Steven at this point isn't a comedian but a good motivator, he's spitting facts
and people wonder why the birth rate is spiraling down
fr
I didn't had a girlfriend and I topped my class.
He didn't have to write original material here. He just repeated the top ten bits of advice his parents gave him repeatedly.
facts indeed
My wifi cut out 8 seconds into the video, and I watched Steven staring off blankly for a solid 2 minutes before I realized something was up. I was dying of laughter the whole time, thinking “this is the laziest thing I’ve ever seen in my life, but somehow the funniest as well” 😂
That made me laugh so mad hard. I’m totally the kinda of guy to hold on a black reaction for way too long
@@StevenHe Steven!!! Read your comment one more time🤣🤣
@@odinaabdurahimova2828 🤣🤣
@@odinaabdurahimova2828 ahahaha I just noticed
Your WiFi is a *FAILURE*
00:02 spam it
I like that at 1:12 you took a picture with the camera cap still on so you just get a blank photo, nice.
My band teacher has three core rules for his class. One is “no dating until you’re thirty”, and one is “no dating in the band room”. Asian Dad is being too generous here.
What’s the third
@@jacks8092 “no social media in the band room”
did he put a foil hat over the band room to block social media and internet from coming inside
Yep, don't date band girls (as a marching band dude I can relate)
The second one is a good rule. As a theater kid, couples backstage was awful. Nothing clears a room like a couple straddling each other and making out. We dimmed the light so the audience couldn’t see it on stage-not so you could set the mood :/
The son: "Imma head out, um imma go to Wendy's."
The Dad: "K."
*Few Minutes Later*
The Dad: "Who the hell is Wendy?"
hit me hard as heck😂😂😂😂😂
I think thats a adaptation or whatever its called of his true story. Him going a burger place and then his parent thinking he is talking about a girl because the words sounds the same
FR lolololololol lmaooooooooooo
You know what's bettet than feelings
A job
@@MehdiHajizade lol
Asian parents are similar to African parents czcams.com/video/30K5HH5wcHc/video.html
His videos are the best motivation I have for studying
"You gotta nake sure you study at least 20 hours a day"
"And what about sleep?"
"Sleep faster!"
"Thomas even had a girlfriend once."
"Who's Thomas?"
_"Exactly."_
Genius line. Applause.
Man I don't understand joke, I feel dumb
@@littlebore7287 the joke is that because Thomas had a girlfriend he was forgotten
@@iAnonymous877 oh lol thanks, now I get it
Man this line hit so hard.😂😂😂
Instant realization of point
Man this line hit so hard.😂😂😂
Instant realization of point
“Thomas even had a girlfriend once”
Me and Steven: “Who’s Thomas?”
“Exactly.”
LMAO this is excellent writing. Another absolute masterpiece!! Steven, this is sooo good! Thanks for your continued hard work creating top tier entertainment for your audience!
My... my name is Thomas. :(
@@eviltom17 “Exactly.”
@@eviltom17 who are u?
Da hell u say
@@eviltom17 you’re not supposed to be here…
"do you know what's better than feelings?"
"a job" 😆😆😆🤣🤣🤣🤣
I feel you! 100% relatable!
0:49: “Life is about doing things you hate to make money.” Wise words 🤣
unfortunately for 90% of us, that is the straight truth
"and then using that money to flex on instagram" LOL
"Dating Before College is how you fail School" - Stevens Dad
For once I think I have learned something from him ngl man.
@Stеvеn Не Shorts 🅥 spam
@Rare one We do not care
HAHA I've been told that till I was like 16
@@StevenHe My parents are exactly like your video
@@StevenHe I have been dating since high school before becoming a VTuber
"you know what's better than feelings a job" straight facts
I keep wanting to write a quote but there's always another one. Amazing.
Steven being the icon of how hard asian parents are and being sponsored by a mental health service is hillarious to me
EXACTLY.
A mental health company
The emotional damage guy.
Perfect sponsorship
@@StevenHe Failure management dad for sure cooperates with them.
@@StevenHe EmOtIoNaL dAmAgE
@@StevenHe Exactly!
*EMOTIONAL DAMAGE!*
@@StevenHe my guy made a second meaning to the phrase "failure management"
The wise words from Steven’s dad: “just sleep faster”😂
If only that worked!
@@Kattywagon29 Alot of people do that, they fall asleep as soon as they put their heads on the pillow, some within 3 minutes, if only i could do the same. To sleep whenever i want. Imagine such power.
@@stephenjohn2131 Some people want their super power to be invisibility. I want to be able to get exactly how much quality sleep that I want, whenever I want, under any circumstances.
If only this worked 😂😂
You don’t need straight pants, you need straight A’s
I didn’t see that punchline coming and that killed me 😂
Crying over the fact that the father just. Slapped a magnet onto Steven’s computer. A magnet. Like I’m not an expert but doesn’t that. Erase memory.
The “All your aunties think something wrong with you now” gets me every time. 💀💀💀 the literal accuracy of it
tell them, something wrong is you dont have time and money, unlike them they must have time and money to think something wrong with you
Reply them
No money
No time
Born gay means something is wrong. So sad😭😭
My aunt literally sat me down to talk about this I don't even know if I should laugh or cry
“You know what’s better than feelings ? A JOB.” got me laughing.
I want to leave a like but its 303
thanks Steven for the mental health awareness. and thanks for sharing about yourself dude.
"who you tryna call?" ghostbuster HAHAHA
2:02 "Why are you not married yet? All your aunties think something is wrong with you"
This line was felt by my spirit.
“You’re so useless you make Sakura look like AMAZON PRIME”
I actually chocked laughing so much at this part.
exactly when i was reading your Comment this scene came on. i almost died
same lmao
Glad im not the only one
Sakura is as useless as you
That would been a funny line
That made me scream 💀💀
The "sleep faster" was incredible. Good job.
I am an Indian and I felt that when Steven says " No dating till marriage".
“No dating ‘til you’re married.”
“Why don’t you have girlfriend?”
“Girlfriend must be super genius athlete, from Harvard.”
All from my Korean mom.
Apparently your mum wants you to be a meek virgin who can't talk to girls because of a hyper study focus lifestyle and suddenly be a chad without practice when she wants grandchildren. Luckily when you look like me relatives don't wonder why your still single, they know.
Here's Thomas XD
@@andi_1485 LOL
We found Thomas, guys...
You should've listened to your mom, bro...
Oh my god that’s too real 😂 I don’t doubt for a second those are direct quotes
As someone who just got out of a long relationship last week when he said “why would you want to have feelings. You know what’s better than feelings? A job” that just hit different haha
you k mate
You know when I'm depressed I watch propaganda music..... They freakin slap
1:14
When Steven dad activated search mode and had a catching phrase for every object I died of laugher lol
We had the 11+exam in the U.K. at age 11 your future schooling and opportunities was decided on how well you did. I failed it badly, but I’ve had a thriving business for 45 years and own two houses and two cars - one is a classic. Such a terrible thing to do to children. I remember the feeling of failure to this day and it lurks at the back of my mind all of the time. Thank you Steven❤❤❤❤❤
Congratulations on 5 million subscribers Steven, you definitely deserve it. I also have a video suggestion:
Steven’s grandfather comes in as a guest for failure management as his methods were used before physics was invented
THANK YOU! Good Idea, I've thought about bring in the grandad
Hello the real Steven
Steven's Dad's Dad; is he going to tell Steven's Dad that he is a failure for raising a failure when SDD's son became the face of Beijing Corn. SDD then goes on to train Steven in high level acting, Steven gets an Oscar, then becomes EGOT.
Finally, Steven is the face of Galaxy Corn.
All in 5min.
what the hell is here?
@@drekky23 They are just spam/phishing bots, Don't click the links. The one that looks like its from Steven has that black v next to his name. Its a fake account made to look almost identical to the CZcamsrs account so ppl will click it.
“Do you know what’s better than feelings? A job”
“Life is about doing things you hate to make money”
Pure fucking gold
And use that money to do things you like
and use that money to flex on Instagram
That was the most accurate Boomer Parent statement I've ever heard.
And wasting that money in psychologists.
This surprisingly motivated me
“That’s not enough sleep” “then sleep faster” steven’s dad is a legend
I remember during high school. My aunt said "Dating will lead to failure."
Me who still is single and reaching 30. And my aunt is like "Aiyaaa why you still single?. Failure!"
Same
When he said: “No dating till marriage”, I felt that 😔
10 likes and 2 comments lemme fix that
Ooof..
Me too😥😥😭
F
@Rare one stop
"Then sleep faster la"
I died there
u got me at "sleep faster" LOL
"life is about doing stuff you hate to get money, and then flexing on insta"
Truer words have never been said
@Guys look👇🅥 I'm ok, thx for nothing
Theres one thing more true.
The reason humans are failures is because they are addicted to breathing. They feel like they need it to live.
"NO DATING UNTIL MARRIAGE"
ah yes, you can finally date after you finish dating
Umm have you ever heard of arranged marriages?
@@abdullahmalik4170 But who is he gonna marry? He's such a failure, nobody gonna want him, unless the girl's family loves corn.
@@abdullahmalik4170 If you have time for arranged marriage, you should be building a business instead
@@abdullahmalik4170 common in india and sri lanka
@@Spartan_117--chief Pakistan and south china have it as well
“Sleep faster”🤣😂🤣😂
Oh my god I have always found Steven's videos relatable but this one feels like it's literally describing my mum's thinking lol
Your consistency and quality of content never disappoints! ❤
B is for bot
1000th like !!!!!!!!
The bots are failures
I am the boss in bot failure management i wont help you with these types of bots deal with them yourself you failure
..
@@QuartzGhost I hate these bots
“Dating before College is how you fail school”
Well, he’s not wrong. Everyone I know who dropped out or failed classes focused more on dating then school so…
Wise Words by Steven’s Dad
😆😆😆 this was a deep lesson ingrained in me
This video unironicy has lots and lots of life lessons hidden as jokes. I know the dad is kinda just used for 1 line jokes but he isn't wrong most of the time. The line about a job you hate for money is what really caught my attention about these life lessons well played.
@@finalformcooler511 then you flex on Instagram
@@ryanwoon3534 I don't even have instagram 😭😭😭😭😭😭
@@Mockingbird7504 then you flex to the gods
"Sleep faster, leh."
Kills me every time 😂
I love how hes reading all these facts off the internet 🤣
"Life is about doing things you hate to make money"
WHY IS THAT TRUE THO
because you then want to flex it on insta.
Or you could just choose a job you like but maybe not get paid as much
"Then sleep faster" is my new favourite quote
“Sleep faster” 😆
"who you trying to flacetime????" im dead🤣🤣🤣
1:11 him taking a picture with the camera lid still on is so stupidly hilarious
HAAA you noticed
"Who's Thomas"
"Exactly"
that hit me hard man, pure emotional damage
HAHAH
I should know by not to take a sip of another while watching your videos because I'm laughing so hard it almost ends up on my computer.
I literally just had a thought that "Steven's father is quite young tho". The guy really lives the role