How to Choose You with Lisa Bilyeu - Terri Cole
Vložit
- čas přidán 16. 05. 2024
- I am so thrilled to welcome my pal Lisa Bilyeu back to the show to celebrate the paperback launch of her book, Radical Confidence: 11 Lessons on How to Get the Relationship, Career, and Life You Want.
We talk about the practical steps you can take to build confidence over time, how toxic relationships erode our confidence, and boundaries and family (specifically, the moment Lisa found out her dad disapproved of her marriage plans).
I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
Time Stamps
0:00 - Quote from Lisa
0:36 - Introduction from Terri
3:30 - The myth of confidence
8:20 - Toxic relationships damage our confidence
11:56 - Red flags for toxic relationships
15:25 - The slow erosion in toxic relationships
19:39 - How to build confidence (step-by-step)
29:55 - When Lisa's father said "no" to her marriage
35:12 - No regrets
If You Enjoyed This, Watch These Videos
• How to Create Radical ... - How to Create Radical Confidence with Lisa Bilyeu
• Build Unshakeable Self... - Build Unshakeable Self-Confidence With These 5 Tips
• How to STOP Self-Sabot... - How to Stop Self-Sabotage and Live Your Best Life
• Raise Your Self-Esteem... - Raise Your Self-Esteem With Better Boundaries
• Can't Keep Your Word? ... - Struggle to Follow Through? Do This To Keep Your Word
About Lisa Bilyeu
Entrepreneur, producer, best-selling author, public speaker, and host, Lisa Bilyeu co-founded the billion-dollar brand Quest Nutrition and is co-founder and president of Impact Theory Studios, a revolutionary, digital-first studio that produces wildly entertaining and original content focusing on themes of confidence and empowerment.
Lisa built a global audience while creating an impressive slate of content that has been viewed over half a billion times. This includes her hit digital series "Women of Impact," a show that features extraordinary guests who, through their stories and expertise, help viewers build their confidence.
With an uncanny eye for talent and market trends, Lisa oversees the in-house development of projects focused on female-driven and empowering content for multiple platforms including scripted, unscripted, and publishing, as well as overseeing all non-fiction content production for Impact Theory. Lisa tells her story of self-empowerment and success in her best-selling book, "Radical Confidence."
Book: radicalconfidence.com
IG: / lisabilyeu
@LisaBilyeu
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see www.terricole.com/
Connect With Me
Instagram: terricole.com/ig
Community: terricole.com/fbg
TC's VIPs: terricole.com/membership
Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
Resources
Boundary Boss Book: amzn.to/44DZID9
The Boundary Boss Workbook: amzn.to/3Ra7CRU
Insight Timer: insig.ht/cpKnbJB4KDb (I have a bunch of free meditations on here and love this app!)
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
www.terricole.com/gethelp/ -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
#terricoleshow #lisabilyeu #confidencebuilding #confidentwomen
Two women on the same wavelength. Beautiful
Thank youuu 💕 Love Lisa!
Thank you Terri& Lisa 💕 for this conversion on such an important subject, confidence.
Who doesn't need it??
I like how you have related action to feeling confident, and how to go about this in simple steps and how to keep the confidence momemtum~
I have found super interesting your discussion on how toxic relations can damage our confidence and how to handle that- joke on you- that you so happen not to find it funny! 🤔Mind-blowing response!!
Good knowing about your book Lisa and good on you for going from non-confident to yes confident! 💪🤗
My two favorite people. I can’t thank you enough for both of you guys doing amazing job god blessed you both
Why thanks! So glad you liked it and thanks for watching 💕
Lisa's Dad likely was satisfied with her answer. I remember My dad was adamantly against my taking a trip alone as a young adult. Sparks flew. Later I heard he spoke favorably of it to others. I was shocked. Great Interview!
Glad you enjoyed it ❤️
She just said a lot. Sadly, a lot of what she is saying also involved some toxic relatives as well. Im single now, thank God, and I don't and won't ever care to be around them, period.
God bless these ladies. ❤ Man the woman in my bloodline, a few of the grown and young man are very toxic. Again, I'm glad I'm divorced and I'm glad I don't live in the same state as these folks. It's only healthy people like us that knows how evil this stuff they are talking about is. Never good.
What an amazing conversation. Thank you.
So glad you enjoyed it 💕
Lisa Lisa Lisa. You are the bomb girl..
Just love that authentic passionate self that you bring to the table. I'm beyond happy to know you exist in my timeline on this planet. Thank you Terri for being such a beautiful host and sharing your thoughts and wisdom..❤🎉🎉
Love this and agree- Lisa is amazing and I'm so glad she came back on the show! ❤️
What an amazing videoooo! Holy smokes Terri looks so much younger! Such a good example of how important it is to take care of your mind and body💓
I would love to expand more on Lisa’s Q on the topic of “how do we know when someone is being authentic and nice versus when it’s a card in the game of manipulation?”
It was mindblowing to learn about how we can positively project and I would love to also see more videos on this.
So glad you enjoyed it 💕
And I have done those videos!
How to spot emotional manipulation: czcams.com/video/K4lf--Y34xw/video.html
Beware these common manipulation tactics: czcams.com/video/XOQDvsK5qcA/video.html
Are You Projecting?: czcams.com/video/-PRDmXaKoM8/video.html
❤
❤️❤️❤️
I've worked on choosing me before in different situations but recently, I found my self not choosing myself. I'm work in progress. Terri, I have a quick question; my family members suffered a lot of trauma and one common denominator in I observed is selfish and self centered behaviors. I have gone to therapy for many years and I've learned so much about trauma. I can see a correlation with selfish behaviors and trauma. I'm right?? I'd love to see a video on this topic!
Thanks for the Q! Could you expand on what you mean by "selfish and self centered behaviors"? Sometimes we have different ideas of what those are so I wanted to clarify 💕
@terri_cole Thank you for considering my question. I have a lot of siblings and a twin brother, and I have observed over the years a lot of self-centered behaviors like them focusing on their own families exclusively without even bothering to offer help to me or other siblings. I had to take care of my father all by myself, and none of them asked how they could try to help me to take care of my father. Taking care of my mom was the same story I had to repeatedly let them know I needed help, and not even like that, they would do much. We all suffered a lot of trauma from the way we were raised with my mother. I'm the youngest of all my siblings and as I was growing up; specially in my teenage years I noticed my siblings wouldn't look out for me, they didn't even ask how I was feeling.I'm the only one who went to therapy for years. None of my siblings have gone to therapy.
I am so sorry to hear that you had to take care of your parents (and yourself!) alone ❤️❤️ I see this happen a lot in my crew, because many of us are over-givers and over-functioners (because we HAD to be, growing up). Our siblings come to expect that we will take care of things and they don't ask if we need help or if we are okay because they assume we've always been okay. It's very painful.
It sounds like you may have been a parentified child, which I go into detail about here: czcams.com/video/r6knaYXOtAQ/video.html I also name some family dynamics that happen which may be familiar to you.
It's hard to speak to your specific situation without knowing more details. It may be that your siblings resent your parents and did not want to offer help because they wanted to prioritize their own families. It may be that they trusted you to take care of it if you've traditionally played the role of rescuer in your family. Or it may be that your parents didn't model healthy behavioral dynamics and you and your siblings dealt with this in your own ways.
For example, I've seen some of my therapy clients with a father wound become hyper-independent because they learned they could not rely on their fathers and could only rely on themselves. This could lead to rigid boundaries and may look selfish, but it is really a form of self-protection. I know my over-functioning was a result of my father wound- being someone others could count on gave me the positive feedback I was seeking.
There are a lot of factors that can influence this! I also have a video about dysfunctional family systems here: czcams.com/video/0RcVwsCzj7I/video.html and I contrast that with what a normal family system looks like here: czcams.com/video/cN-cgDZSTLs/video.html Those may give some additional insights. ❤️
I'm sorry but how are you putting these goal plans together? How can someone know they need validation in order to confront someone? Geez what else don't I know? What other things go in to the formula of a perfect life?
Lisa outlines much of this in her book, Radical Confidence. If you're interested in this topic I invite you to check it out- it may be at your local library, too. I don't think Lisa came to these realizations overnight. It's often a long, long journey of self-discovery and self-knowledge. ❤️