Matteo Lane - Kids Doing Their Coming Out
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- čas přidán 4. 08. 2022
- #MatteoLane on 7 years old kids coming out of the closet...
#MatteoLaneStandUp from the #JustForLaughs Festival in 2018.
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As a middle aged lesbian who pays her mortgage on time, thank you. I feel seen.
Same!
You go sister!! Haha
😁😂😂
Same lmao
Damn, I have a better chance at becoming straight than getting a mortgage let alone paying it on time... I'm not ok lol
My 16 yr old wrote, "I'm gay" on her sneakers then waited for me to notice. I loved it.
Love that for her
My mother would’ve whooped my ass.. for destroying my sneakers lmao
@@maries6368 sorry you had experience a violent home
@memento81 I think that "whooping ass" was rather figurative and, actually she meant she has a great mother who would care more about the condition of her sneakers than her being gay 🙂
hey, so how long did it take for you to notice? if you don't mind me asking
"Two middle-aged lesbians paying their mortgage on time" 🤣🤣🤣
That one sent me!! 😆
As a mddle-aged lesbian who pays her mortgage on time I cannot stop laughing
@@stefaniaceccarini9896 hahaha same
I don't need to be called out like this lol
Truth tho. Every middle aged lesbian couple I’ve ever known were like the couple described.
Matteo is such a breath of fresh air. I don't need every comedian to be a philosopher, sometimes I just need someone with fun energy and good impressions.
When you get a beer at a bar do you go “Beer is such a breath of fresh air. I don’t need every drink to be a cocktail”???
🤪🙃
@@jonli Yeuppp!! Sometimes all that extra fluff is just pretentious, overrated and therefore overpriced!
I don’t really know what you mean by that to be honest. The majority of comedians I know are the farthest thing away from philosophers and nowhere close to trying to be one. Now, if you just personally watch a bunch of political comedians, I could see you getting that idea. Whereas normal comedy is just for laughs(pun intended), Political comedy is more like comedy with an underlying message that’s usually attributed to a political standpoint. Generally though, if you’re watching political comedy and you find yourself not being able to enjoy the comedy because of your own feelings about the political message being said, then you probably don’t like political comedy very much.
@@coasterthekid8867 they mean Dave Chappell
@@bm4114 If they do mean Dave Chapelle that’s kind of the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. If anything I’d say the people getting upset at trans jokes and then bullying said trans girl to suicide are the “philosophical” ones.
I love how comfortable he is with himself. His stage presence is great and he's so quick.
accurate comment
I babysat in high school back in the 00’s and regularly watched a nine year old who would have his “boyfriend” spend the night most nights I was watching him. It was hands down the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen.
Aww ❤Makes me sad at the same time that you very rarely see gay/lesbian kids
@@eithyr well to be fair, most kids that young rarely display their sexuality to begin with whether theyre straight or gay.
personally imo, its kinda weird when kids are dating before theyve even hit puberty.
@@eragon78 You are right, but being gay or straight has not necessay anything to do with your sexual interests. As far as i understand, there are for example assexual gay/straight people. Because its also about who you are romantically interested in, or feel a closer connection with in a way. So, when it comes to kids, they can for example get crushes on somebody - boys or girls. And yeah there are people who have said that they knew when they were like 5 or 7 years old that they were gay, so its also about a way of identifying who you are as a person i suppose, since its a thing that you are born with 😊
@@eithyr How is that possible? being gay/straight is literally a sexuality by definition.
Its literally defined as being sexually attracted to different sex or same sex partners.
I guess you can argue the point of "you can be romantically attracted without being sexually attracted' aspect of it, but romantic attractions are still very closely related to sexual attractions. Also, romantically attractions dont always align with sexual attractions, and gay/straight is more so often used to refer to sexual attractions.
two kids who havent developed their sexualities but have a "romantic' attraction to each other are basically just two kids having a playdate.
And obviously I have no issue with people thinking theyre gay/straight or whatever when theyre 7. My issue really is just I dont think kids that young should be getting into the whole "Dating" mindset. They are way too young to know what they actually want. I mean how likely is it that theyre actually going to be dating that other kid in 5 years? its probably pretty close to 0 because their interest are almost definitely going to change, and im not talking about sexuality or anything either, again, these kids usually dont even have a strong sexuality at that age straight or gay.
I just personally dont think kids should be dating until theyre like, at least 13-14 ish imo. Any younger than that and there is virtually no chance they actually know what they want in a relationship, and are likely just mimicking something they saw on TV without actually knowing what it means to "date" someone or have a romantic relationship with someone.
I mean obviously if two kids are close let them be close. I just think them actually like officially dating is a bit of a stretch for kids that young. Its a lot to kinda put in the mind of a kid that young.
And yea, if they still feel that way by 13/14 and their relationship has grown organically, then yea, if they want to date let them. But two kids dating at like 7 years old is basically they had a fun day together and now they think theyre dating just cuz theyre friends. They dont understand the first thing about dating at all other than what they saw grownups doing or what they saw on TV. I mean theyre 7 year olds. They dont exactly have a grasp on what they want in life yet.
At least by 13/14, theyre getting to that age where theyre old enough to start experimenting and figuring out what it is they want.
@@eragon78 Actually, by definition, a sexual orientation is an enduring pattern of romantic or sexual attraction (or a combination of these) to persons of the opposite sex or gender, the same sex or gender, or to both sexes or more than one gender (Wikipedia). That’s what I have been tought in school as well and that’s what the national LGBT/human rights advocacy organisation in my country (Finland) defines it. It’s a bit deceiving because I think it should be called ”sexual or romantic orientation” instead of just ”sexual orientation”. Anyway, I do agree with you that young kids dating is a bit weird. I didnt start dating until i was 20 lol.
Man, I love this guy! My son came out in the early 2000's and I was so relieved because I could see what trying to be strait was doing to him. He found out that a couple of his friends were also gay. We had no problem with this news (he was in his late teens) except for one relative who insisted that this was all a cry for attention. Right, if you had a choice why wouldn't you want to be someone who is vilified and attacked, right? He's a happy man who finds friends wherever he goes!
"...and my dad was in Vietnam, I feel like his two gay sons are his second Vietnam..." That's a great line!
Your dad didn't get PTSD, he got LGBT. Lol. Folks, I'm here all night...
XDD
Ok, here's a laboured one: Every time Mateo's Dad hears someone say "Charlie's in the bush" he thinks "I wish my sons were."
@@dmgroberts5471 Oh don't worry, the will be in a bush alright ;)
Tip your waitstaff 😄👍🏼
Instead of seeing flashbacks of machine guns and dead comrades, he sees Matteo doing a pirouette.
This man is the representation we needed
He’s awful!!!
@@ferise1 why
@@ferise1 yeah why?
@@ferise1 He’s not. He is funny, incredible singer, good actor, and relatable. Overall I would say he is a good performer.
@@ferise1 that’s what your mother said when she gave birth to you isn’t it
The documentaries thing is soooo accurate. In school, we watched an hour long documentary, and then the teacher printed out the script for us to annotate.... and it was literally 14 pages! Just for context, normally, the rule is a page a minute, but they somehow managed to stretch it to a page every 4 minutes.
The worst ones are the ones with commercial breaks because after each break the narrator recaps what they've said so far, by which time it's time for another commercial break.
This guy is effing FIRE!! That audience didn’t give him proper credit for the first half of this bit.
I mean, the "cry and listen to Madonna like the rest of us" line is fantastic xD
That documentary part was so true. They’re really asking questions like I watched this to be educated not more confused
Kids are so lucky these days. I remember in the 70s and 80s people treated us like we had a mental illness and that being LGBT was a sign of delinquency. Not to mention during the aids scare people thought they could get aids just by talking to you. I'm so happy that people are finally able to be themselves without as much fear.
Oh! You were alive for that! I’m so sorry you were there for that horrible time, but I’m studying that time period and I would love if I could pick your brain about that time period, if it’s all the same for you. 😊
Thank you for paving the ground for younger gays like myself!
I came out twice. Once at 11 years as soon as I realized I was queer. (Didn't go over well and went back into the closet.) Then again at 14 which also didn't go over well, but I didn't care as much that time.
It’ll all be just fine-trust me👍🏼👀
Same, except I was twelve. Im still back in the closet :D.
They know, but they choose to ignore it. I lied to make them happy. I told them I was still a girl but I just went by any pronouns-I’m not a girl. But I also don’t want to deal with their bullshit.
The first was a practice “coming out”. You slayed the next time. They are jealous because they don’t get a parade and a full month….
So true about the British narrator 👌
Hilarious
Its hilariously true
It’s why airports and hospitals use British voices on their public address systems. They “command” authority. It’s the Downton Abbey effect.
would not work with all British accents
I always forget that he has such a beautiful singing voice and then he throws it in like that.
I never came out, there was never a talk about it in my family, it came a time where they had come to terms with it, then the converted to Evangelism refer to it as my problem and shoved me back in the closet so I shoved myself out of their lives as much as possible. They will never know I am engaged and eventually married to my man! ain't life a cabaret! LOL
Sucks :/ Hope you’re doing well. I’m a lesbian that hasn’t come out to my parents yet and honestly I’m not sure I want to. I know they won’t be horrible but I just don’t need their condescending looks or their remarks on my life
@@jayl24548 thank you I am indeed, hope you are also. When it comes to family the less they know about each others lives the better. Best of luck.
@@jayl24548 just do it you will feel so much better no matter what their response is. You maybe surprised that they don't care and love you for who you are.
@@handyhank1967 it's possible... with the sexuality stuff I could see it, but I'm now very uncertain of my gender as well and they have a habit of watching a very conservative "comedy" show that spends 30% of their "humor" making fun of trans people... so I'll probably come out eventually but if their response is bad I'm not sure I need them in my life. I really appreciate the response and the advice though! It's good to hear from other people about their experiences and what has worked well and will keep what you said in mind
@@jayl24548 well whatever the decision you make is all up to you. I cannot tell you what to do and more power to you for being honest with yourself. Hope it all turns out well ❤️🩹
I feel this way embarrassingly about kids now after being diagnosed on spectrum / Aspergers in 30s. Really glad though that young people may more readily live full happy lives without going through a lot of wasted pain, stress and confusion
I've been bingeing Matteo Lane for a week now.
His comedy AND his body are getting better - sweet! 👏😁
I noticed that too!
I *would*. His stache makes him almost like an 80's classic gay.
@@Rhinogradentian That's the one thing i would encourage him to get rid of.
I hope he doesn't start with steroids and end up a gay stereotype
😂😂 the generic Arabic song killed me, and yes they know much more about articture, and why we are astonished if the Mayan and the Aztecs did. Why can't the Kemits do it a.k.a Egyptian.
So for a minute I misread that as "Kermits" like the frog and I thought it was some sort of weird slur and then my brain caught up.
Yeah like id almost say yes they did know more than we think bc we think they were all idiots when they were brilliant (Egyptians and Mayans and really every ancient society)
Also, I mean I love ancient societies and they were more intelligent than many conspiration theorists give them credit for...
But a pyramid is a pile. A pretty pile of huge chunks, with holes, but it's still a pile. Building a big one is only a question of time and effort.
Show me an upwards structure (which they did in the same time, so yay) and we can talk about an impressive act of architecture. ;)
Yes they knew more than we do, like how to contact the aliens
Matteo never fails to make me laugh... sooo funny at the same time im learning new stuffs from him. also, i love at how good he is at singing... esp the o mio babbino caro song .... hes really talented 💖💖💖💖💖💖
I love honesty in stand-up comedians. This guy has my mark 👍
Living for every moment Matteo breaks out that good old classical voice training
I didn't even know I was gay until I was 12. I still haven't came out, though it's not really like I'm hiding it.
I’ve never heard of them before but I’m so glad I found out about him I just bought a ticket to the NYC show for March 2023 I can’t wait
He has really improved. He seems way more comfortable on stage now.
I want him as my best friend lmao !! Would always be a good time !!!!
If my kid told me he was gay, I'd be ok, BUT DID YOU DO YOUR ALGEBRA YET!?
Matteo is the man.
My alarm went off just at the right time so instead of Mateo singing Arabic music I heard Bobby Ferrin singing Don't worry,be happy 😂
Oooh learning ! 🤣 Love thé purple light in the room too.
Omg I laughed so hard at the last joke. He is really funny. :D
Matteo is extremely talented!! I love love LOVE his work
I had a friend, ill call him Kevin, who in 4th grade came to school in pink tennis shoes. This was in 1988. We were friends all the way through high school, and was soooo gay. I thought he knew? But then senior year he got a gf. Mullet basketball team taller than him. I was shocked but then thought about it and was like naah, it makes sense. After high school we lost touch until our 20s. I found him and we talked on the phone. He said "Amy I have to tell you something very important..." I thought he was dying, but no... "I'm gay" and I busted out laughing. I said I know. He got annoyed. "Oh my godddd Why does everyone keep saying that, A-meeeee?" I really don't know...😳
I feel him on that one! Sometimes, it really is hard to realize how not-discreet your behaviors are. 😂 Half my family suspected I was lesbian before I came out because of how much I ooh-ed over female rockers and game characters.
Had me laughing out loud 😂 love it 😊
he imitated the Egyptians way too well.😂❤
I love this guy....Matteo is Brilliant....
I came out to myself at 15 and fully came out 2 years ago as a lesbian. I don't look my age which is good and I absolutely love Matteo he's the best.
I felt like I was watching the documentary
My dad realized i was gay when i was 4 years old .
at 14 i realized he was right and i couldn't deny it to myself .
Wait, you got me intrigued
How? Girl, I need some story
@@Lean-zj1nl i was obvious by the time i was 4 .
@@shydreamguyman4098 Yeah but how? What were the indications?
@@lilacberrym i don't know and i can't ask him he died when i was 9 years old , 2 months before i turned 10 .
he was only 6 feet tall and i was 5 ft 11 at 9 so instead of me getting new school clothes that year i wore his clothes to school .
i grew to be 6 ft 6 .
@@shydreamguyman4098 Oh that's sad to hear :( sorry.
Another wonderful Matteo video!
"his second vietnam" 😂😂😂💀
Really enjoy this guy!! 😘
Big congratulations to Matteo Lane !
I loooove him
This guy is so good
Genius level comedy. Bravo.
he sounded really good when he sang!
He's actually a trained opera singer. His voice is insanely good
Thank you
I want more!!!😭😭😭
Best thing to watch you while im eating or trying to relax 🤣🤣🤣 very funny
“They get the British narrator so Americans are like, oooh LEARNING”
Love your you tube clips
❤😊
This guy is really good !
Just discovered Matteo recently …he is one funny man
This guy is so freaking funny
Omg, I just want a pride poster with the normal looking person. Average body and all.
my nephew is literally 5 years old rn and he already identified himself as a boy at 4. He was called iara and he already told his parents that he likes to be seen as a boy and use "boy clothes", also changing his name to iaru before deciding recently that now his name is Samy. His parents helped him a lot, which i thought was so DAMN wholesome of them to support instead of saying like "oh is just a kid, they don't know what they actually want". Honestly, i'm really happy for him and also really shocked sinse i never saw a kid realize their sexuality and/or sexual orientation at such a young age.
This is so cute! I love when younger kids find out about their genders, cause usually romantic and sexual come later in life
Btw it's gender and not sexuality, just to clarify :)
@@imbored457 oh yeah, sorry, i forget some times. And yeah, it's really cute! Usually trans people find out about their genders when they're kids, while they're developing likes/dislikes, so it makes sense, but still, like, 4 years old already saying these stuff is really nice to see
@@sS0O0L have you seen the video about these parents you raised their child gender neutral? So that he could decide what he was later, which was a boy in the video
@@imbored457 oh, i've never seen it before! That's so nice! I might check it later
"Scream" oh another one"😂😂
When I was 7 I still thought I was straight
Matteo's got back!
Oooh ! Learning !!! LOL !!!
'ooooo learning ' lol
Absolutely agree ☺️👍
It’s so true of documentaries 😅
"That's all it takes"
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Would Matteo do a collab with randy rainbow? The voices would puddle us all!
Im very bitter about my coming out, mostly because I didn't get to come out to my parents, instead I was outed by my entire school for kissing my first girlfriend when me and her were just trying to figure ourselves out, I feel the need to mention we were both in the fifth grade so we didn't know a damn thing about sexualities and to have so much just dumped on us was overwhelming, but on a better note I am now a happy pansexual trans man with many supportive friends.
The documentary joke is so true
It always bugged me!
love the hint at stargate :D
I never really hid the fact that I was bi (including it in my language) but never openly said so, my mom and two months later my dad asked me if I was gay. I didn't really come out to my parents.
They didn't ask without reason, I was a facts machine at the time, educating myself on all sorts of matters (mostly history though) but they noticed my interest in lgbtq+
"His two gay sons are his second Vietnam" LOL
I met two middle aged lesbians on a cruise I recently went on, and I absoulutely love them! We hung out everyday and we had such a good time. I'm confindent they pay their mortage on time! 🥰😂😜 Represent!
His biceps look good and he knows it
Sooooo funny!!!
This guy's a hoot 😅
As an American … ooo learning cracked me up!
1:55 I mean, there is also the ANCIENT PYRAMID OF ROME, so there's that :P
I think you need to do more of the advice videos
Matteo and Andrew Schulz are my 2 favorite comedians
Aliens did it. I am wasting all my time. Love it.
That's such a normal feeling.
This I like
I feel the same about documentaries.
I came out twice but my parents still don’t believe me. My sister came out and they believed her and they think I’m copying her. News Flash; she’s not gay. Now I cry myself to sleep and wait for the day I can be FREEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
his *ss looks GLORIOUS in the clothes he wears here
They get the British narrator so the Americans are like '~ooh learning~" 🤣
idk why but him telling a joke and then when the audience laughs he just
:0
:)
*breath*
:|
:)
:0
I knew I was "different" when I was 7. It just took me until 33 to consummate the fact.
I love him
I google documentaries too ain't no time for that :)
The Egyptians knew the earth wasn't flat so they knew more than some currently alive people
you are built!
No seriously why ARE the documentaries painfully long?!! 😂😂😂
hahaha
Flawless loop helloooooo????
lmao where have i been?
I love muscle marys